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#im sure people feel they may align better with other cards but
nahalism · 1 year
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What suggestions would you have for someone who feels like they're blocked from achieving the life they want because reality seems intent on exiling them from opportunities to connect with people on their wavelength? I.e: If they are placed in a class it will be the class with poorly motivated, unambitious, introverted students while the other class has high achieving, extroverted students who go on to connect with each other and make waves in their field
hey angel. quick disclaimer, i only give suggestions i would give to myself & im aware what im about to say can easily be misinterpreted which would lead it to cause more harm than help and thats the last thing i want. so disclaimer lol, im not saying this so you feel like you brought misfortune or unfavourable circumstances on to yourself, but rather to encourage you to rise to the occasion. id rather be blunt and to the point, cause i feel like clarity is the first step to fixing things, which is a better result than me trying to pacify you with soft words yfm?
so, on the one hand, life could be handing you shitty cards, yet on the other it could be challenging you in a way that brings out character and grit you didn't even know you had. — theres a principle i base a lot on called the law of correspondence (basically, the idea that the reality we experience around us is direct reflection of what is in us). its possible that deep seated beliefs you hold about yourself, or how you perceive yourself in relation to others, are being mirrored back to you. — ill give an example to make what i mean a bit clearer— (idk what its like where you went to school) but, who's to say that despite the fact they werent in your class you couldn't have made friends with the extroverted students? or that you couldn't have exerted that high ambition and drive to make your own waves? sure the road would have been lonelier, but you may have found more people similar to you as a consequence, or experienced alignment with your goals and expression of your character. being the only one may also have been another call to rise to challenges around you. it may have made you stand out, or even encouraged you to be a leader/forerunner for your class, and in turn inspired the other introverted people (who may have also felt like you) to aim higher and achieve more.
what im getting at is that life isnt out to get you and unfortunate circumstances cant stop you being who you are. there are so many people who do great things without support, acceptance, and despite great resistance. so trust in that, trust in yourself, and dont let the fact your undertaking your journey alone deter you. go against the odds and do it for yourself. the grass always looks greener on the other side where its been watered and tended to. but rather than running over to where its already green, its good practice to take up your own tools & learn what it takes to make your own grass thrive. that way no matter the circumstances you know u can stand.
hope this helps. sending love 💌
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zyonsay · 3 months
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Wildfire, Chapter Seven MV1
Fem aligned people may read but not f3tishize my work!!
Summary: The white room glares at you tauntingly
Reader: Male
Warnings: Injury, Hospitals, Slightly angsty
Now playing: 'Ultraviolence' by Lana del Rey
AN: Hey dears, this one is tiny bit angsty, im feeling devious pookies. Send help. Sorry for the long wait! I was overwhelmed with requests and private events >:[ I hope you enjoy though!
Comment or dm me to be added to the tag list!
(Here is the previous chapter)
(Here is the next chapter)
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“We’ll need to keep you here for two more days, until your condition improves. I’ll keep you updated!”, the grey-haired doctor smiled brightly, but you didn’t feel happy at all. The cold, sterile light gave you headaches and the get well soon cards on your side table mocked you silently. ‘I hope you’ll get well quickly!’, yeah right.
You hated the hospital. You hated the white walls, the white floors, the white curtains. You hated the forced smiles, the shaky hands of the underpaid nurses and that disgusting sanitary smell that crawled up your nose and into your brain. The bed was comfortable and warm, but if you closed your eyes, you could feel the imaginary straps tying you to it like you’re some lunatic in a mental asylum. Tick, tock, tick, tock. The further the hands of the clock wandered, the more irritated you got. You were pretty sure that this is what it feels like to go insane. Steps hallowed out in the hall and then even those disappeared and once again, you were all alone with yourself in this glaring white room. As if you’re going to torture yourself by staying awake, you thought while closing your eyes to nap. Maybe you’ll sleep through this whole thing.
A light knock danced over the door and your eyes fluttered open. A quick look to your right showed that it must be some time in the evening, the sky was dark and the city alight. A sweet, pale face peeked through the lightly opened door, which was soon accompanied by a much more tanned visage. For the first time after the crash a faint smile tugged at your lips. “Hello there mate!”, the older of both practically stormed in and rushed to your side to give you a hug. Oscar, though much slower than Lando, also shuffled towards your bed. Lando risked a quick glance at your leg making him wrinkle his nose, not in disgust, but rather pity. “Shit, that looks bad. Does it still hurt?”, the concern in his eyes was apparent but you really couldn’t bring yourself to give a shit. “I’m high on the pain meds they pumped into me, so no.” You winced at how rude your tone sounded; you really didn’t mean to come off as mean. Not to your best friend. Although he didn’t mean to show it, his expression visibly soured at your words. Oscar’s concerned gaze landed on your face. You looked tired and, just like Lando, bitter. If he didn’t know any better, it would look like you’re laying on your death bed. The aussie couldn’t stand the tension in the air and decided to do something to lighten the mood and shoo away the threatening, lightning filled clouds above your head. “Me and Lando brought you a little something.”, he gently handed you a paper bag. “You shouldn’t have.”, the little whisper escaped you subconsciously as you fished an object out of the bag. It was a light blue Nintendo, one of the older models. When you looked back up at Oscar, a slight grin adorned his lips. He then gestured for you to explore the bag further. Blindly fumbling around in the bag, you pulled two square, plastic cases out. Turning them over, one depicted a picture of a tiny dachshund puppy and ‘Nintendogs’ in broad white letters. The other case looked almost identical, but instead a chocolate labrador crowned the cover. You couldn’t help the small smile from creeping onto your face. They remembered.
“I used to love that stuff as a kid. I could never get a real dog because of my mum’s allergies, so I was obsessed with these.”, you shoved your phone into Oscar’s face, a picture of the Nintendo’s game cases on the screen. “She would have to take away my Nintendo, so I wouldn’t be playing it through the whole night!” Lando’s face lit up. “Ohh, I remember these! I always chose the shelties”, if you squinted you could see the tiny stars glow in his eyes as he rambled on about his own experience with the game.
“Thanks.”, your voice was hoarse, and the words almost got stuck in your throat as you choked down tears. This wasn’t the moment for you to cry. They would only pity you more and you definitely didn’t need more of that. Oscar’s smile faded, he felt incredibly bad for you. An Achilles tendon rupture was serious, and you had barely started your Formula 1 career. He didn’t want to pity you, he knew you’d hate him for it, but he couldn’t stop the sad sigh leaving his lips. Your thoughtful expression hardened again, and your lips formed a straight line. “It might be best for you guys to leave. Thanks for visiting though.”, with glossy eyes you mustered up a small, dishonest smile to appease the two boys. Lando’s eyebrows tugged in an annoyed manner as he moved from your side, towards the door. “Get better soon, we’ll see you around.”, he whispered before messing with the handle of the door. Oscar winced at the venom in Lando’s voice and offered you a gentle smile and a court ‘goodbye’ before heading out too. Seconds after the door closed again, you heard Lando’s awfully offended sounding voice outside. ‘We come to visit him, bring him gifts and he still can’t loosen that fucking stick up his ass?’
That one stung.
Now that you were once again alone, you let out the sobs you’ve been holding the entire time. Your chest heaved and sunk with sad little whimpers and your eyes were puffy from the salty tears that streamed from them. The light flickered and the aggressive, sanitary atmosphere caught up to you again. Your shaking hands clutched the Nintendo tightly, pressing it to your chest. What have you done?
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taglist: @velunis , @ares10156 , @ineedhelp-takethatanywayyoulike , @leosxrealm , @erinleclerc , @badblondebisexualboy
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asphodxlos · 3 years
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𝒘𝒆 𝒎𝒂𝒚 𝒂𝒄𝒄𝒆𝒑𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒇𝒂𝒕𝒆 𝒐𝒓 𝒅𝒆𝒇𝒚 𝒊𝒕, 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒘𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒏𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒅𝒆𝒏𝒚 𝒊𝒕.
▮FFXIV ― THE MAJOR ARCANA ‘ ( 1/2 )
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Hermitopia AU Masterpost 1 [COMPLETE]
This is a gathering place for the events of the Hermitopia AU, as well as art and writing resulting from it (art and writing listed at the bottom). Please read the AU introduction and rules here before submitting! Feel free to join the discussions on the HCHC discord server!
(Disclaimer/PSA: All points are asks contributed by the community, the mods take no credit for the ideas within them)
If you would like specific credit in the masterpost, please sign within the text of the ask! (A dash and a signature at the end should do.) Asks not signed will be treated as anonymous.
Summary posts:
Not all elements of plot and character will be summarized, but here are a few basic things you may want to be familiar with before submitting an ask! (Unless you are purposely aiming to create an [ALTERNATE] idea for a Hermit)
1 - Starting positions and each Hermit's powers (based on the submissions from Day 1)
Summary post 2 - Interpersonal connections (based on Day 1 and 2 submissions)
Make sure to check out the second masterpost here for more up to date information, including newer art and writing!
Asks:
- (copied ask) [summarized mod comment]
- Hermitopia | Scar was experimented on by Cub. He gained dangerous powers and wings that resemble a dragon’s, but he keeps both hidden. Unless someone makes him angry. He has no idea who gave him his powers. Eventually he and Cub decided that they wanted to control things beyond their corporation, so Scar ran for mayor. (there are things to fill in but im lazy) [Scar assumes he got the powers in an accident during research. He enjoys having them but has no idea that they were intentional.]
- Hermitopia AU team ZIT is a superpowered crime-fighting trio!
- owing to a very particular set of guidelines he put in place, Joe can now copy powers if he sees them in use and can reverse-engineer how those powers are used. needless to say, this is massively overpowered in the right hands.but it got worse. at some point, there was an... incident... on ConCorp grounds, something to do with a mass amount of entities causing time dilation -- and Joe was caught in the thick of it, unable to be rescued for a while.the problem is, he got out by piecing together how the time dilation worked.needless to say, Joe... has a ridiculous powerset. so he chooses largely not to use his powers anymore unless it's absolutely dire or petty enough to shrug off as a random occurrence. nobody needs to know that one of the most powerful Unaffiliated in the city is standing right in front of them... especially not ConCorp.
- doc was a former high ranking employee of concorp before he volunteered for an experiment and it went horribly wrong. since then, the company has tried to erase any evidence of his existence. doc is now seeking revenge for all that the company did to him and is determined to tear it apart
- HI ok follow up asks will be sent later when my thoughts are coherent but concept: cleo has like super messed up healing powers where she can make healing go Too Far. also i pin her as unbound, considering, like, everything - shovel-shuffle
- So, his power was meant to be super-regen, right? except things don't always quite go to plan. Someone volunteered for the powers surgeries and is arguably dead. Etho is a name shared by the many many clones that developed themselves out of the leftovers. They're not quite individuals, not quite a hivemind. Any one of them has no fear of death because the others will continue, but they all act independently around their overarching goal. (which I won't snitch about) - DragonKay
- Bdubs was a hero. Key word? Was. He climbed the ranks through the government, he was a loyal and dutiful member of society, and he used his plant manipulation powers to subdue evil-doers without hurting them. But he’s always been a friendly guy, and he couldn’t help himself—talking to the Unrestrained, especially those in custody, was interesting! ...but it’s a slippery slope to walk, being friendly with the enemy and not sympathizing to their cause. Nobody knows where he is now, but there are rumours of a vigilante with similar abilities, and his three compatriots, two of whom he helped escape from ConCorp... They call themselves the nHo. - slimetek [Bdubs deserted Concorp while helping Doc escape after his experiment went wrong]
- Concorp managed to make a device that allows animals to speak or translate their thoughts into writing. This means that the good old mayor Scar has a certain cat giving some advice on how to run the city.
- Iskall is an assasin/mercenary against their own volition. An accident they'd rather forget almost killed them, and in exchange for their freedom and free will they got to live as a cyborg. Though its hard to forget with the implant that covers their eye and the limb of cool metal hanging at their side - @ghastly-ghostie [Iskall works for Concorp off-books, bound by the debt owed to them for the life saving experimental modifications]
- so I think grians original powers could be like cloning, but something goes wrong and the clones are different people. as a result of the duplication process, some funky magic rocks are made. the clones decide to take most of the funky rocks and run off, leaving grian with one rock that gives him some new abilities and the clones' rocks give him others. also uhh mechanical wings bc yes. so grians plot is him trying to find them while also causing problems on purpose. infinity stones. update to my grian ask from earlier, I had better ideas: the rocks are old like magic things that grian finds before the cloning and ends up collecting, but his clones snatch them - simplyskipper [some of the alternate Grians are aligned with different factions in Hermitopia, while the locations of others are farther or unknown]
- Hermitopia- Impulse has solid-light powers. He has golden crystals implanted in his hands, which he can reflect light through to solidify it into all sorts of shapes. This can be used to make barriers, projectiles, and much more, though more detailed constructs take more time.- @mleemwyvern
- Hermitopia AU Poultry man is a well-known chaotic neutral leaning towards good, as a one of the unrestrained.
- I think Team ZIT should be a little be wild card-y, that's how they act after all! [they are employed by the government for standard crimefighting, but they don't always take Scar's word at its intended meaning and often play a bit on the chaotic side when given instructions]
- [Hermitopia AU] False is an antihero/vigilante type who's specialty is not defined by powers or the such, but just... the absolute skill of being able to dual wield two (more sci-fi era) short swords. Maybe someone upgrades them to be "enchanted" (electrical, fire, etc. something that tech could do well probably). She's willing to be paid-for-hire, but if you go past her moral line she's also willin' to backstab you. -- @cheshire-vex [she's a free agent who sort of drifts between Concorp, the government, and whoever else will pay her on a job-by-job basis]
- Hermitopia impulse has more connections then one may think. He has ties to people pretty much everywhere, for reasons unknown. There is a 100% someone will come and greet him wherever he goes. [the greetings are usually friendly]
- Hermitopia Au! Keralis is a hero who most people wouldn't expect to be too skilled at fighting. His power is similar to hypnosis so he has no need to get very physical. Yeah, that changed when some bastard villain decided to attack his friends shop. [that incident caused his employer Scar to realize his untapped potential for protecting people and assign him to a few more high-stakes jobs]
- Hermittopia!TFC was one of ConCorp’s first experiments and as such his powers are a bit less...refined then the others. He has geokinetic powers, allowing him to psychically control rocks and other earthen materials. He used to be one of the VEX programs top graduates, but has since parted ways with them for unknown reasons and now operates his own plans of keep crime in Hermitopia under control. -lechairpourriedegrianri [he is considered Unaffiliated and both Concorp and the government largely leave him to his own devices, since he is helping to keep the city together]
-Wels doesn't have powers. He does have a super-suit made of fire and heat resistant carbon fibre (like the material used for the space shuttle) and has a built in hologram projector. One time, he used the hologram projector to project an image of himself, which everyone thought was a clone. He didn't have the heart to tell them otherwise. (AKA everyone thinks Wels has powers but he doesn't) -Silverwolf53 [he got the suit in Project VEX]
- To follow up on the Impulse ask- Team ZIT are a space-themed superhero team. Government-aligned, at least for now.Tango has meteor-like powers, he can shoot fire from his hands and feet and often uses this to propel himself at high speeds. Zed has gravity powers! He can increase or decrease the density of any object, to the point of making small black holes. They all have space-themed costumes, and it was probably Zed's idea. - @mleemwyvern
- TFC was the first participant in project VEX
- Grian was an attempted success. It fixed some problems with Etho's unintended cloning, but at the same time created some problems of its own, seeing as the clones appeared to have a life of their own.It's fine, though. It's probably fine
- I would say Grian is unrestrained, a bit like Etho, Chaotic in his own way. Does not activily Try to hurt people, but does mostly what he wants for fun.-Ciara
- Xisuma is a civilian- he has hero friends, but despite all their teasing he’s never wanted to go through VEX training. But in the night, the unrestrained Void walks the streets [Void is a symbiotic creature made of nothingness that uses Xisuma's body as a substitute physical form]
- Bdubs was such a good man... he could be trusted to look after Doc, couldn’t he? Somebody had to oversee him, somebody who was reliable and would never, ever consider betraying the mayor and ConCorp...They let their guard down, and Bdubs got curious. Bdubs made a friend.And then they lost him.- Slimetek
- The hels hermits are considered evil by default. How do you spot these clones, how could you protect yourself? Well in the past it was a lot easier, just look for their red eyesNowadays contacts exist but that doesn't stop people trying to call the police on tango, calling him a hels. Hes netherian, they have unnatural eye colours and their iris fills the entire eye, hes not evil but if people keep doing this hes gonna be!
- Beef woke up from his brain surgery to receive telepathy powers, took one look into the mind of the overseer, and noped put of there as fast as he could go.He's on very public record. After all, the mind control he may be capable of is a very convenient explanation for anyone who turns against concorp... ~DragonKay
- Hypno can’t control minds.They say he does. It’s why he’s named Hypno, after all.In reality, he can’t control people like that... but he can control what they see.Your best friend might look like your greatest enemy. A pit of lava might look like solid ground. A 100-foot drop might look like a step down.It’s a good thing he’s a hero, and a good thing he keeps his true powers hidden beneath a guise of low-level hypnotism. There’s no telling what he could do if they let him go. [he works for Concorp, helping to protect VEX trainees from people trying to harm them before they get a chance to finish the program, as well as keeping other resources safe]
- The 9th Street Incident [referring to an earlier Impulse comment] was a friendly greeting. That particular version of Etho just thought that drawing weapons would be a friendly greeting for Impulse, but Tango and Zed seem to disagree
- They still don’t trust Bdubs. He was with the government for a long time, and things are hard out there on the run. Besides, they don’t know what he got up to there. ConCorp could have any sort of information on him, something that might scare him back.Bdubs understands this. He doesn’t want to go back. He’d hate to go back....but they think he will, and maybe there’s something he’s not telling them. An ace that ConCorp has yet to play.- Slimetek
- Mumbo works for concorp as an engineer specialising in robotics, most recently taking on the task of maintaining Iskall's cybernetics that somehow they just keep damaging. Iskall assures him they're just.. very clumsy. So far Mumbo hasn't caught on.
- Ren's power is that hes a werewolf, but he only found out when he was in his late teens with his childhood friend Iskall. He still feels guilty about it, he did kill his best friend afterall. Or so he thinks.He's lived off grid ever since, too overwhelmed with grief and guilt to rejoin society. Most assume he's dead too - @ghastly-ghostie [Ren dropped Iskall off to Concorp as a last ditch effort, running away before he could see whether they took his friend in or not. They did, starting Iskall's plotline. Iskall told Concorp about Ren's abilities, triggering a panic in the Concorp ranks at the fact that Ren is a superhuman being created by some force other than their own project]
- Where does Void come from? The same place all powers come from.Little did they know, something survived the crash and has taken a human host. Maybe it's not the only one...No, that place is not Concorp. Concorp's original goal was to develop technology by reverse-engineering from a crashed alien spaceship. These aliens did gene-editing the way some people do nose jobs, so they adapted that technology, too.~DragonKay
- i've already said a bit about it in the discord but i have hermitopia cleo brainrot. joe being there was able to save her by giving her the regen powers along with her puppeteering telekinesis power. anyways cleo is presumed dead, sent by concorp into a mission as fodder basically until zit could arrive. but now there's is one (1) bitter undead vigilante against concorp that is presumed dead
- Stress’s name has a few meanings in relation to her. Whenever she gets too angry or /stressed/, she transforms into the StressMonster, a monster that feeds off of other people’s stress to become more powerful. Luckily, the monster is rarely seen, but does terrible things when she is. She’s one of the most feared creatures in Hermitopia. Stress hates her and tries her best to hide her from her friends, but it can backfire sometimes. - @guster-animations
- to follow-up on Joe being presumed dead: remember the time dilation incident he was stuck in? ConCorp figured it was best to cut their losses and not try to send anyone in to rescue him -- it would be a pointless mission. so they abandoned him, quietly announced that he had died in the line of duty, and put the affected area under high security clearance in order to prevent any future accidents. they figured he was already dead. and Joe figures, given that they up and abandoned him, maybe it's for the best that they continue to figure just that. he changed his last name to "Hills" -- a joke about the biome containing the time anomaly -- and otherwise proceeded to stay under the radar. he still uses the time dilation area as a base of operations, sometimes; it's very useful to have a hideout that people physically cannot get into/out of without his direct assistance. is he nursing a grudge, coming up with some convoluted scheme to get back at the paramilitary group for abandoning him? or does he just want to live a relatively normal life off the grid? who knows. that's the Joe [REDACTED] Hills difference. -@betweenlands
- False has some big scary power that is almost Eldritch she just happens to prefer a sword and doesn’t really care for who she works for as long as they’re paying... (they don’t need to know of the power that had harmed the ones she loves the most)
- Keralis once encountered Void sulking around where Xisuma worked. So fearful for his friend’s safety, he used his power on Void and told him to go away. Apparently the charm is still active, because if Void spots Keralis anywhere, he’ll turn tail and run. No, it’s not because he’s scared. Absolutely not.
- Grumbot serves as a sentient supercomputer created by Mumbo for Grian. Grian is using Grumbot for... various activities, all of which harmless, but a certain evil clone [Helsknight] has reverse engineered the technology. Concorp would like for Mumbo to give them the tech, but mumbo stuck some eyes to the computer, got emotionally attached, and refuses to give up his baby boy.
- When Impulse hears his friend/colleague Bdubs has been "taken over" by the mind-controller [Beef], he wants to go on an off-the-books mission to rescue him! Just giving up like they were told to isn't in his nature.Of course the rest of ZIT are with him. Heroes save people! It's what they do!~DragonKay
- Hermitopia is a mixture of sleek futuristic and cyberpunk in terms of style. It really depends on where you live and work (ik this doesnt include any hermits but whatever) - @ghastly-ghostie
- I wonder if Cleo's overactive healing powers affect herself and if any injuries she receives immediately heal over like wolverine or deadpool
- Ren used to be friends with Cleo too, but then she died. Strangely enough, she died on the same day that Ren killed Iskall. Ren’s lost all his friends. It’s hard living in isolation when there’s no one left that even cares about you. (Unless— no, that’s impossible.)
- I was thinking about Biffa, like you do. And Biffa would totally be some robot that was created by Project VEX in its early stages, however they realised fast that it was easier to use humans and give them powers, maybe its not their strong suit with robots. But Biff went sentient and glitched and was scrapped so hes just out there doing his thing. Hes a wildcard and plays for which side he wants at the time, sometimes he'll help or sometimes hes the one causing trouble. He looks pretty similar to a android like in Detroit:Become human but hes a bit uncanny and eerie, maybe its the eyes or the blood red armour. Powerwise, he's got more strength than a human does, mainly because he isn't limited like others are. try not to get punched by him, it'll hurt! [He's convinced Concorp will destroy him if they find out he's alive and Unaffiliated] -lucodak
- Going off of my thing about hermotopia impulse having friends everywhere....this may include the nho. Okay, they beat him to a pulp on one of his solo patrols once, but theey felt bad n patched him up! He has to keep it a secret. He brings them dinner alot. And checks in on them.
- Beef is the perfect cover-up for Bdubs’ desertion. ConCorp doesn’t want any other employees getting bright ideas, now, do they? Nor do they want employees getting nosy and trying to figure out where Bdubs went. They don’t have to tell people what Beef’s powers are. They just release that he developed powers after brain surgery, and a rumour that he was spotted lurking around before Bdubs suddenly betrayed ConCorp... and people draw their own conclusions. -Slimetek
- xB is pretty sure he’s supposed to be evil.I mean, that’s what sentient AIs usually end up being, according to a quick internet search. And yet he’s... not. Or maybe he’s just on the wrong side. - Slimetek
- Yes impulse is friends with the nho....what he doesn't know? He's....easily susceptible to hypnosis. Very easily.......Of course, after impulse is basically a very tired n warm cuddle bug, so, cuddle piles tend to happen after all information is spilled. He must've fallen asleep at their apartment again! Whoops! But it's okay.....they take good care of him if he does! [Beef is using his mind reading ability on Impulse without his knowledge, to make sure that he hasn't spilled their location and to predict the government's next moves. He feels slightly bad about it but feels that it is necessary for the nHo's survival.]
- So far, Grian has only ever encountered two of his clones, NPC Grian and Robot Grian. Technically three, if one were to count Ariana Griande. Grian doesn't really, but some do. [Ariana Griande is a popular musician in Hermitopia who is building a career using the magical stone of voice enhancement she recieved through the cloning process]
- To handle the two Grumbot issue: the one working with Helsknight can be Jrumbot, a legion of robot drones meant to work as Grumbot’s physical form that ended up being hijacked by Helsknight and turned against ConCorp
- There...aren’t a lot of “normal” animals left in Hermittopia. ConCorp took one look at the animals populating the city and decided that, hey, they could make some improvements. Species after species, they modified their behavior, appearance, internal structure, whatever they could fix, tweak, or add. They were just improving their lives and the lives of the citizens of Hermittopia, after all, but the new animals quickly outcompeted the old for resources and habitats. And if it makes it easier for ConCorp to stick a camera in one or two of them, or set up robotic animals to keep a better eye on the city, no harm, no foul, right?(Bonus: there is one (1) singular cat left in Hermittopia, resulting in a spy movie-style heist where two teams of Hermits attempt to “rescue” the cat simultaneously. The cat keeps wandering away from both teams. Shenanigans ensue)- Adonis [the cat is Jellie, who orchestrated the competition between Team ZIT and Cleo and Joe for her own entertainment, getting away from both parties in the end]
- The Leak:Not all mutations are the result of controlled experiments! If some alien tech got away from the crash site, concorp never would have picked it up. It might have got into nature, not as refined as they made it in the labs but causing little changes here and there. Ren may have become a werewolf from being bitten by a mutant wolf~DragonKay
- Impulse is able to use his powers to create illusions or male things appear invisible! Sort of. After all, light dictates what we see. It takes a lot of focus, though, so it's not that practical. -@rayveewrites
- The one thing Hels wasn't able to steal was the cloning technology, hence his hostility with Concorp -- he needs the cloning device, because how else is the void going to get a body of their own? - SilverWolf53
- *glances at the hermitopia werewolf ask* okay but what if the same mystery people who made ren into a werewolf also created jevin, and maybe Etho? idk if either of them have been given any hermitopia headcanons yet lol. but im sure the same people who made a werewolf could make a sentient slime (or perhaps rescue one) or make... whatever etho is. [Since the "second organization" is an incorrect assumption believed by Concorp, Jevin was created when he came in contact with a waterway contaminated by The Leak. Concorp assumes he was created by an opposing organization and not by accident, and therefore would like to bring him in along with Ren.]
- hermitopia - mumbo and grian were friends back when cloning experiments were still happening (or . as friendly as you can be with someone who's treating you like a lab rat), but after everything went wrong and grian escaped, mumbo has his memories wiped nd thats why he's trusted w iskall's stuff? bc he inherently remembers working on high-level things without knowing where he learnt it - muscle memory, yk?anyway massive angst with grian maybe recognising mumbo, but not the other way round, and trying to rekindle their friendship? and that's where grumbot comes in? -gin [Mumbo's memory was wiped so that he would forget the deadly purpose of Iskall's cybernetics, which he was working on at the same time as the Grian project in the background. Mumbo does not remember creating Grian's mechanical wings or Iskall's arm and eye, and he has no memory of either individual previous to "meeting" Iskall as the person assigned to his repair and upkeep.]
- Etho doesn't so much have powers as he is powers. All the powers the ‘original’ had went into creating him; now he just exists, as whatever sort of being he is. Not a human one, that much is obvious. ~DragonKay [Etho has no powers beyond the hivemind and his training, due to the error in the experiment that caused the clones]
- Mumbo started the button as a joke. A nonsense social expirement to see how much people want worthless signs of status. Unfortunately things got out of hand, and violent too. But hey! It's not his fault that the five special anomalous stones were misplaced into the prize dispenser! It was just chance that they fell into the hands of the clone of the worst gremlin in the city! Don't fire him! [He was not fired, but Cub was Decidedly Unhappy with him for a good long while]
- Void mostly trashes ConCorp facilities- trying to figure out if any of his siblings survived the spaceship crash, but occasionally he’ll pilfer from a bakery, because X is a health nut and Void just wants a gods damned cookie [Void very much dislikes unseasoned chicken]
- If the Stress Monster gets too big, too dangerous, Cleo is sworn under oath to Stress to zap her with her healing powers. Cleo doesn’t like to do it, overhealing a stressed Stress makes her so calm she gets knocked out for a couple of days, but Stress can take a small comfort in the fact that at least one person out there can stop her
- Ooh with the self healing Cleo she'd be able to develop a small amount of super strength, with how the mind keeps from going full throttle because it would destroy the body once she gets over it it's hysterical strength whenever she wants [it is quite painful, but a good backup plan]
- Being a hive mind of disposable clones that can spawn new copies at will, it can sometimes be hard for the Etho Entity to remember that it is indeed a big deal for other people when they get hurt. This can make him come off as callous to those around him, placing him firmly in the "villain" category in most citizen's books, but he really doesn't intend any harm!
- Grian used to be tall, but then the cloning happened. With each clone they stole a little bit of his height making him the short man he is today. He needs to capture those clones and get his height back. [Grian isn't entirely sure how to accomplish this, but he's dead set on trying! He misses being tall!]
- While Grian was perfectly fine with Ariana Griande living her own life, he did insist on one thing.Her "older brother" getting backstage access whenever she was on tour. He's very proud and supportive of her and her music career.
- Mumbo is perfectly content working in tech, watching the other hermits get up to crazy shenanigans. Except of course, there was that one time he was out testing some new gear and accidentally saved a crowd from some villains... and there were all those times after too...But hey! It’s not his fault that people like him, and he certainly isn’t going to get caught by Concorp during his after hours activities. [Mumbo considers himself an accidental hobbyist, not thinking he has the nerve or the skill for proper hero work. Time will tell if he's right about that or not...but unfortunately, he probably is. This should be fun.]
- There’s still some people overseeing VEX, even over Cub. They’re the ones that push Cub to do certain experiments or to scrap one. They’re the ones to give Cub the decision for Iskall’s life debt. Scar was under them too for the longest time, but eventually he wanted out. Cub still wanted in. They were still in the right, right? That’s what they tell him. He’s starting to doubt it. [Cub is way too invested in everything he's built to even think about going rogue now, but he does resent and occasionally question the judgement of his superiors increasingly as his project begins to fail more and more often. He also fears that Scar's shift in career will be seen as a betrayal, rather than as a tactical attempt to gain the company influence in the government.]
- Been thinking about the impulse + nho asks and just,,, what would happen if concorp/the government found out? It cant be good with interrogation/hypnosis on both sides (incase you cant tell,, the brainrot got me as well) (apologies if this is a mess im excited) [Hypno is assigned to set up an illusionary conversation to make Impulse reveal nHo location to Concorp and government agents while thinking that he's actually talking to the nHo in a random encounter]
- The one mind Beef can't read is Etho's. Their hivemind is just too weird for him to comprehend. If he ever tries to listen in, it sounds like just a bunch of static from an old TV.
- for hermitopia au!: Out of most of the heros, the most reckless may be team zit. sure they tell themselves they'll plan out missions but it's hard when they share a braincell and tango just runs in. impulse and zed share a look everytime and have to run after him to make sure he doesn't get too hurt or overwhelmed by the enemy. in their defence its hard to plan ahead against an enemy when you dont know what they are thinking.-lucodak ["You might not have known what they were thinking, Tango, but we'd generally like you to know what you're thinking!"]
- i bet ConCorp really wants to make it out like theres some secret shady organization creating all these people with mutations, rather than their own operatives deserting and their own failure to contain dangerous chemicals... whether its malicious coverups or just ignorance to the fact they messed up, wonder what would happen if that sort of thing came to light...? [If they found out that the unintentional superhumans were a result of the poorly-contained crash site? Cub would lose his job...maybe worse. If Cub found out (and he hasn't, yet) he would do everything in his power to keep that information from his superiors.]
- (paraphrased) Impulse accidentally walks in on heroes and agents breaking down the doors of the nHo's hideout and confronting them. Scar claims that they did so on information Impulse himself provided and thanks him for his service. Impulse, feeling confused and betrayed, resists Hypno's attempts to illusion him back to Scar's side and flees the scene with the nHo, knowing very little other than the fact that he doesn't want to be manipulated by the government any more (and still not knowing that Beef has been reading his mind)
- Impulse may have been labeled a traitor. But do you really think that Impulse, secret rebel, starting to learn how dangerous and corrupted Concorp really is, wouldn't let his best friends know about the danger they might be in? I think Team ZIT is more loyal to each other than to the government. - @mleemwyvern [ Impulse's first stop after escaping with the nHo is to find a place to secretly meet Tango and Zedaph and tell them about the way he was tricked. It takes a lot of explaining and a lot of trust, but they eventually decide to believe his claims and are left with a choice: will they openly go rogue and become a target along with Impulse and the rest of the nHo, or are they better off using their established image and reputation to keep an eye on the government heros' movements from the inside?]
- (two asks combined, paraphrased) Ren runs out of supplies and decides to head back into the city, confident in his ability to stay off the grid after so many years of experience and such a long time away. Once there, he runs into Doc, and they hit it off quite quickly. However, the more Ren talks the more Doc realizes - with his ex-Concorp knowledge - that Ren matches the description of Iskall's main target exactly. He warns Ren, who is then faced with the knowledge that Iskall is alive and assigned to kill him...so many questions and so many tears to follow...
- Why did Hermitopia start needing heroes? When the Unrestrained started to appear, if course. Why did the Unrestrained start to appear? A question asked a little less. When did the VEX program start? When did they start taking more risks? When did they stop caring about certainty and safety and shift towards trying to push boundaries they weren't ready to? People can be so enamoured with the concept of superhuman abilities, something bright and glorious and good- and perhaps they could have that too- they don't ask all the right questions. It's all an elaborate game of damage control, don't let the flashy heroics fool you, they've made mistakes, terrible, terrible mistakes, and now there are villains running loose with powers they fooled ConCorp into giving them. Are they villains? Are they victims? Does it matter? They're causing problems. [Project VEX has developed into a solution to its own problems, a self perpetuating cycle...one that Cub, as a businessman, is very familiar with. It's what keeps the wheels of industry turning. It's what keeps innovation creeping forward. It wasn't intentional, not this time...but if it keeps his project alive, he'll take it.]
- One time, Jevin had narrowly dodged being captured by Concorp. He was laying low in the forest out of town, when he had a run-in with some sort of wolf creature. Thankfully, claws and teeth couldn't exactly hurt him anymore, so he just played dead until it gave up.When the moon set, the wolf-thing slowly transformed into a human being. Ren was horrified at the thought he'd lost control and hurt someone- again- but Jevin assured him he was fine. Jevin got the feeling that the werewolf needed a friend, and Jevin himself needed a place to stay for a while... -RayveeWrites [Ren and Jevin are not currently in the same location, but they each have a means of contacting each other for help if needed]
- Worm Man wasn't a well- known super, but plenty of people have noticed that he seemed to vanish at the same time Team ZIT first started active duty. Those people have also noticed that one of the members has a very similar power set to WM.Officially, that's just a coincidence. Officially.-RayveeWrites [Zedaph was trying to get some unofficial practice while still in training in the VEX program]
- A common misconception is that Bdubs conjures up his vines from nowhere. He can't.Like any plant, his vines grow from seeds. They grow unnaturally fast, when Bdubs wills it, but they have to come from seeds. Where do these seeds come from, you may ask?Well, a long time ago, Bdubs ingested some strange fruits. Somehow, in wild defiance of human biology, the seeds contained in those fruits worked their way into his muscles and germinated. Some of the roots worked their way into his brain and fused into it; the rest spread through his muscles, grew beneath his skin, coiled around his bones. Thanks to the way the vines connected to his brain, Bdubs is able to command the vines, and their magic, at will.The vines produce seeds; some stay in his body to replace the old ones when they die, and most work their way into a pair of 'seed pods' in his wrists. Bdubs provides the nutrients, the energy; the vines provide the seeds, the magic. As an extra bonus: if the vines were to be totally removed from Bdubs' body, he would be at best extremely weak, and at worst dead. The vines have grown into his muscles, to the point where they've essentially replaced them in some areas. It's fortunate that they connected with his mind so early on, otherwise he'd be dead. -RayveeWrites [Concorp developed the fruit, and the fact that Bdubs is evidence of the unlikely success of that experiment makes them all the more angry at his betrayal]
- A lot of excellent xB information (it's too long to copy but please read it it's very good)
- Iskall has exactly one (1) failed assignment. That assignment? The kill or capture of Stress. Stress and Iskall have been, or should it be were now, friends for a very long time, since before Iskall even met Ren. So one can imagine the stress this causes Iskall, to be told to kill his one remaining friend that he knows is alive. Of course, this stress is quite enough to to Stress's Stress Monster into one it's strongest yet seen forms, allowing for Stress to then get away. (1/2)(2/2) Of course, Con Corp doesn't- and can never- know the true reason that Iskall cannot kill or capture Stress. If they knew, if they subjected Stress to the same hell he's in- no, that cannot happen. So Iskall hires False to protect Stress, to interfere whenever they send him on a mission for her. Luckily, False is good at keeping secrets when she wants to, and this one she'll keep. But as far as Con Corp knows, Iskall has severe stress and trauma from being a cyborg, and that's why he fails. [This all adds up to a monumental waste of Concorp's time and money, which also results in False getting payed, so all parties involved are happy except for Concorp >:)]
- Impulse would take a bullet for his teammates, and he knows they might be about to take one for him, keeping him updated on what's going on government side of this... slander. Still, Tango and Zed are great actors, and if he didn't know better, he might be a little worried they would *actually* be hunting him down in the name of justice [Tango and Zed are now being sent on missions to retrieve Impulse, which they must pretend to lose believably. They occasionally overestimate their friend's abilities and give him a few more close calls than he'd like, but overall the ruse is holding up.]
Writing:
- Wels, Hels, TFC, and Grumbot
- Bdubs Concorp promotion and desertion
- Joe Hills in his time dilation hideout
- Etho clones, ZIT, and the nHo
- Keralis and Void
- [ALTERNATE] Reveal of Impulse's situation with the nHo
Art:
- Impulse suit design
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syubub · 3 years
Text
Yoongi birthday reading/energy check!!
It's sweet sweet tangerine bois birthday!!
I wanted to do a cute little energy check up to see what's up and ask some fun little questions!!
I'm excited so let's just do this shit!!
Disclaimer: this is for entertainment purposes and not to be taken as fact!!
---
I want to apologize for the absolute shit pictures but what's new lol
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So, let's start with the platform. First thing I noticed was the blue was brighter but the platform was darker? It was like someone cranked up the contrast to 100. Ngl it looked pretty cool. Yoongis platform doesn't typically have a barrier like some of the others do so I just kinda walked in and did the whole, "happy birthday, I have questions" His energy seemed a lot more... vibrant? And playful I guess? It was really nice. Now. The actual connection was intresting because the cord was blue again and like, real thick. (I don't think my perceived thickness of the cord has and real correlation with how strong the connection is. It was just thicc) this time though, the cord was connected at the chest instead of the third eye. So i was like, ??? But my guide didn't give my any sort of helpful input (my guide likes to watch me suffer in my confusion. I'm sure of it)
Anyway, cord like that and then yoobi gave me a headbutt to connect at the third eye. Idk why he gotta be like that :( istg next time he's gonna flick my forehead or something.
I was like "cool cool cool. I want to do the reading now pls" and idk how to explain the energy other than sassy. You know? Blah blah blah I'm thinking, "I don't remember him being so cheeky but maybe I've been gone long enough for him to level up into his final sass monster form"
Anywho, this was intresting because after the little strings were connected and stuff, we plopped down on the floor. And it was like everything I was doing irl was being mimicked infront of yoons energy? So we were sitting facing eachother and I was putting the cards down between us?? Usually that doesn't happen but it was kinda fun!!
Moving right along. I first asked if there was anything he wanted to say or needed to get across and it was 11. Now, 11 has come up before and I'm still not to sure what it's in reference to? My best guess is possibly he's been seeing 11:11 or that it's 2? Idk let me know if you have any clues lol. Other stuff was just kinda banter and stuff.
So so so.
The reading. First thing I asked was how he was doing. And I shuffled his preticular way (when I ask a question I always ask for the energy to tell me how much to shuffle or when to stop. For yoongi it's always 2-2-2. So 2 bridge shuffles, 2 hand shuffles and then split the pile in 2. That's why I think 11 might be 2 to him?)
The cards we got are ace of swords rev, justice,the heirophant rev, the empress.
So based off this I was like okay. I want to pull clarity cards for the two rev cards to get a better picture so I pulled the emperor rev for ace or swords rev and strength rev and wheel of fortune rev for the heirophant rev.
Starting with the ace of swords rev, and the emperor reverse. It seems like yoongi has been re thinking his relationship to control in his life. That's he's possibly noticing any unhealthy needs to control his life and the situation around him. It could also refer to his judgment being clouded by a rigid approach.
With the justice card it makes me think that he's possibly considering a big choice in his life or that he's really doing some deconstructing of his own views. This second idea fits in well with him getting clarity on some possibly unhealthy control issues in his life.
Now. The heirophant rev, strength rev and wheel of fortune reverse. This was intresting to me bc they are all major arcana. The heirophant rev can really talk about no longer needing outside approval and making your own way in your own time bc you are your own teacher. Strength in rev I kinda read as self doubt and feeling down in this case. Like a lack of confidence in himself and his abilities. And the wheel of fortune in reverse I took to mean as his breaking cycles. All together these cards kinda paint a picture about wanting and trying to break a cycle of self doubt and self limiting beliefs and learning more about himself and why he think what he does about himself and searching through everything for truth. It's really good!! In short he's doing some nice soul searching and trusting himself to guide his own way through this self discovery!
The empress! This card seems to pop up for yoobi a lot and I think it really speaks to the abundance that surrounds him! Not just money but the abundance of creativity, love, friends ect.
Now now now. I asked him if there was anything that he wanted to tell us about himself or bts or what's happening in the near future. For that I got 2 of cups, king of wands and 3 of coins.
So the 2 of cups is partnership. Usually romantic. Could be pertaining to the may 13th thing that is ever present lol but I'll get to that later. With the 3 of coins talking about teamwork, this could definitely hint at collaborations coming up!! That's the vibe I get. No one crush my dreams. And for the king of wands it could be talking about taking the reigns on a new project and starting to get it done. Like a new opportunity. This could be a new bts project like starting a new campaign or new venture or maybe personal like the a mixtape or doing more songs for other groups ect.
I had to ask him how he was feeling about the grammys. I had to. Had to. The cards were ace of wands, 2 of wands and death reverse. When these came flying out I could help but smile. Yoongis energy was almost giddy too!
Witht he ace of wands
It's that spark of creativity and inspiration. It's that feeling when you get super excited over some new thing. I think this is the perfect example for feeling reinvigorated. The 2 of wands takes that spark from the ace and tries to funnel that excitement and newness into something directional. Using that burst of creativity to start planning for future progress!! Its so nice to see that! If they don't win (IF) you bet we're gonna get some bangers about a corrupt system. If (WHEN) they do win we'll get bangers about how thankful they are to have gotten where they are in spite of a corrupt system. I just want to hear an uncensored version of yoongi being like, "HOLY FUCKING SHIT, WE DID IT BITCHES. FUCK ALL YOU BASTARDS THAT SAID WE COULDN'T."
I can dream....
What a nice dream.
Now I asked if there was anything yoobi wanted to say to us as in advice or comfort or anything like that and I got, Clearing negativity, make time for self care, when I'm tuned into the energy of abundance I become abundant. when I'm in a state of appreciation im in vibrational alignment with my true love nature. The world rev, 2 of swords rev and that project, that person, that idea is waiting.
Awe. Take care of yourselves!! Make sure to take time to enjoy what you like and try not to let any negativity get in the way of you enjoying your days. The world rev to me seems to be talking about seeking closure on the things in your life that have been impacting you. Tie up those loose ends so you can move foward without triping over yourself and 2 of swords rev I think talks about information overload and being kinda indecisive bc of that. Take a sep back to evaluate the situation at hand because sometimes it's so close you can't see what you're looking for. Those of you who are studying and getting frustrated because you just can't seem to get it, try taking a step back and doing something to take care of yourself and come back to it so you can approach with a clearer mind. Try not to get stuck or paralyzed by choice but if you do get stuck, take some time to detach yourself from the situation and come back later!
A fair few people wanted an update on yoobis soulmate as well. If you need a refresher here's the run down. Yoongis soulmate is impossible for me to read, yoongi is a smug ass and I'm nosy and probably a little dumb.
Now that that's cleared up
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I asked, "am I missing something?" (As to why I can't connect and why yoongi won't give me answers.)
I got queen of cups, magician and the high priestess. I read this as him being like, "yeah dude, you aren't woke enough"
YOONGI just give me answers pls. The high priestess is intuition and sacred knowledge, the magician is manifestation and the queen of cups is also intuition.
At this point I was like, okay you little shit, can you at least tell me how your soulmate is doing? Can you do that for me?
2 of cups, 2 of pentacles, 9 of wands and knight of wands. 2 of cups is partnership usually romantic, 2 of pentacles is priorities and managing them, 9 of wands persistence, knight of wands motivation for a new thing. His soulmate last time was in the process of going through some shit and figuring it out and it seems like now they've got a better clue of how to move foward and are currently heading towards good things/ important things in their life (possibly like working towards dream career or had an idea for a business the want to start or field they want to go in.)
I was thinking about the next question when this popped into my head, "if you know about your akashic book, do you know about your soulmates? Have you read it?" I used my pendulum. No movement at all. What so ever. "Are you listening to me?" Yes. "So answer my question please" No. "Do you like to watch me suffer?" Maybe. "Do you know the answer to the question" yes.
YOONGI WHY
This cheeky son of a bitch.
Now I was like, fuck it. Imma ask him the big boi question.
"Is your soulmate present when I do these readings?" Yes.
WHY THE FUCK CAN I NIT PICK UP ON IT???
I had to take a deep breath dude. Yoobi is testing my nerves.
"Are they hiding their energy?" No.
I was actually gonna combust. This makes no sense.
I asked yoongi if he would tell me what I'm not getting. Silence. So i ask my guide.
"lol ur dumb"
Watch me Google "how to fire your spirit guide"
Istg this feels like some dumb prank. Maybe I'm just genuinely oblivious to his soulmates energy or maybe I'm just doing something.
What do you want to bet that his soulmate is just hiding under the platform and I'm too stupid to notice or some dumb thing like that.
yoobi, sir, why must you do this?
I decided to continue.
"What message or thing have you learned from your soulmate recently that could be valuable to us?" I got healthy communication in relationships and deep replenishment.
Good to know you can have a nice communicative relationship with your soulmate bc I CAN'T.
I'm petty about it, sue me.
The message does stand though. Good communication and taking proper rest to replenish yourself.
Now I had to ask yoongi directly what he thought of may 13th.
I got the lovers, 7 of swords, the magician and judgement. The seven of swords was intresting and it makes me think there's some extra stuff at play here too. 7 of swords is about getting away with something and deceit. The clarifier was the magician.... this could mean a lot honestly. It could be that maybe yoongi will have his relationship exposed or possibly that maybe him and his soulmate meet but yoongi is disguised? Idk how that would work at all but I'm stumped. There's a lot of variations that this could be. The magician is about manifesting and having everything you need to create what you want. This could possibly mean that maybe he gets a sudden idea that's like, "oh I have to go here right now. Its super important" eventhough he has practice scheduled. So that would let down his team but he would be following his path and it might lead to him meeting his soulmate? Maybe vice versa? Idk let me know what you think??
With the judgement its about inner calling and kinda like the peak. Like shit has been leading up to this moment. With the lovers too it does seem like a union?
I asked him, "but like what's gonna happen on the 13th thought and I got the 10 of cups. Divine love, bliss, alignment, happy mushy gushy shit. This is why I'm so inclined to think that they'll meet on the 13th or things will get serious or their paths finally cross. The cards seem to heavily suggest that.
My dude. Yoongi is really sappy, pass it on.
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For the last question I asked yoomgi if there was messages/ advice he had given to his soulmate that we might benefit from.
First step, open your third eye, open your heart, sign from heaven, open your arms to receiving.
A lot of opening lol.
It's good advice though learning to be open and receptive and taking that first step in tackling life or any situation.
Oki. Now for the disconnecting. It was not nearly as strange as it has been in the past. I was just like thanks dude. Again, happy birthday blah blah and I got up to leave. I noticed it looked like we were in sitting in one of those old plastic hoola hoops? Like the pink and yellow ones lol. As I was looking at and and like??? Off to the side the numbers 13, 28, 54. Obvi 54 isn't a date and then I the last yoongi check up there was book pages and I feel like 54 and 28 were the pages?? I'm not actually sure as I'm writing this so I'm gonna check.
Yep I checked. They are the page #s.
So that's intresting.
Other than that though I just kinda left and he was like, "bye" and that's all.
Not as cool as other yoongi adventures but equally as frustrating.
TLDR
Yoongis doing pretty okay and he's a cheeky little shit. My guide like to watch me suffer and yoobi is mushy gushy squishy.
Happy day of birth Syub!!
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attic-witch · 3 years
Text
☿️ Mercury Retrograde in Gemini   ☿️
aaaaaannnddd im back... sorry for my short absence, the Lunar Eclipse got me all kinds of busy n hectic last week. As if that wasn’t enough chaos, here we are at the beginning of Mercury Rx season in Gemini. Considering that Gemini is the sign of witty banter and our connections with others, let’s first remember to be extra careful with our words while the ruler of communication is travelling backwards!!! Now for anyone who isn’t sure what retrograde means, it’s not that Mercury or any of the other planets are physically moving backwards, it’s just that our perspective from Earth creates an optical illusion and so as a collective, we receive a planet’s energy reversed while it is in retrograde... I like to think of it like pulling a reversed tarot card, this is not always a negative sign or energy, though it may be the opposite or extreme version of it. 
Mercury, as the ruler of the mind, communication, technology and travel, may bring many complications in these areas while he is in Rx from 29 May-22 June. EXPECT DELAYS!!! Mercury Retrograde is like getting a permission slip from the universe to slooooooow tf down. Your plans may get delayed or cancelled, your car or laptop may break down, you will definitely become prone losing things or forgetting to hit send on that important email so double check everything and take your time!
Mercury is the fastest moving planet in the solar system, going retrograde about 3 or 4 times a year. Each year, he travels through a different element of the Zodiac (Aquarius at the beginning of this year and Libra will be the final Mercury Rx of 2021) but! Mercury has not been in Retrograde in Gemini since 2015 which was the last ‘air year. The sign and elemental group in which the Rx takes place shows us where we should focus our energy during this time of turbulence. Introspectively, Mercury Rx in Gemini asks us to focus on our creative talents and intellectual interests. Outwardly, we should be expressing our energy and feelings towards our social circle and psychical engagements with the world. Like the twins, we need to honour our sense of duality in an ‘as above so below’ kind of approach. Equal and opposite. Not one without the other. 
Thanks to Gemini being a mutable sign, this retrograde will fly by like a gust of wind and will be over before we even realise what the hell just happened! But this will still have a huge impact on our lives and especially our personal relationships with others. Any relationship which is not secure or has tendency to be problematic will be put to the test, however, with such a buzz in the air, we will be more drawn to strangers and casual small talk with people we don’t know so well. Make sure you keep your communication with others open and honest but remember to have boundaries and express when someone crosses any of these. One of the most important practices during retrograde season is self-care! 
There is no way to escape change during Mercury Rx so looking more deeply into ourselves, doing the shadow work and identifying what needs to go will be much more beneficial than just letting the universe do the work for you. You may lose something important to you but Mercury will reward those who have put the work in to better themselves. Mercury is the ruler of Gemini, so having this retrograde happen at home is really just hitting the reset button on our lives. Have faith that the changes ahead will bring you back to your core self and help you be better aligned with your highest purpose. Resisting change over this next month will only make things more difficult and uncomfortable for you in the long run- especially in relationships! 
Hold no expectations for the next month! Accept what the universe has in store for you and get creative in your forms of communication! Sing, write, dance, paint, scream into the night when it all gets too much. Let go of what you think and be open to new ideas! 
Blessings on you all. Stay Safe out there ! xox
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tarotnoob · 3 years
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Hello, been reading through your posts for the past few days! If Im not too late, can I get an individual reading? thank you :-)
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Okay, I’ve already read up on most of the cards, so I’ll try to make all the potential messages as concise as possible.
I was so uncertain about the archetype oracle deck for some reason. I just wanted some cards to describe you so this is probably the fourth pair that came out - I think first was visionary/engineer which come out so much, I was like hmm SUS. But similar cards came out anyway, so Midas and Priest sound alright because there was always this tendency of one spiritual card and then one creative or potentially “negative” card but since Midas and All that Glitters both came out from separate decks, I feel like there’s a message there.
The tarot cards:
Page of wands Ace of swords 9 of cups
To me, this looks like you’ve recently set your eyes on some type of goal/wish/desire. Something new. There’s even looking to be like (because of ace of swords and the 8 of swords peeking at the back under Chariot), that maybe in recent past there... wasn’t this sense of confidence or direction, but now there is. It could have only recently started as an actual situation or simply an idea or desire in your mind. The page of wands is enthusiastic, creative, filled with that sort of childish delight - it can even be about receiving a message. The ace of swords is determination to set out toward a goal, possibly after recently experiencing the end of a harder lesson or tough time. Nine of cups is usually related to a wish or desire, something you are or want to manifest and even good luck. IMO, this has good vibes and the feel of starting something new in life that you want and are excited about, even determined to get. 
All that glitters worries me because I could read this plus midas as starting an endeavor that will be successful, likely in financial regard or material, etc... but the meaning of that card is more about things looking better than what they really are and being wary of status. The shadow side to midas is also - hoarding money or emotions and being obsessed w/ a loss of status. So, I’m obligated to say something like - if this concerns the future goal, just make sure it’s really what you want, your intentions are aligned, that, I guess, it’s spiritually beneficial to you. However, this could also be about the past circumstance you went through in which something you had/wanted/a person/situation wasn’t what you thought it was or it turned out not to be as good as you expected, you learned from that, and now have a new goal or I guess the cards could be describing this whole journey in which you went after something only to realize it wasn’t as good as you expected... but that would be kind of lame, so I think it’s more maybe this is in the past, you learned a lesson that made you realize what you really want and now you’re set on a better path that you’re already manifesting.
The fox oracle is like that, as well since it talks about not being able to understand light without darkness - so again a sense of having to go through shit or... having to discover what you DON’T want or desire so that in the future (or now) you can manifest what you DO want that’s right for you.
Priest talks about being a channel for spiritual messages - this can be that your intuition is pretty sharp (this also fits with ace of swords), or even that you could have some type of... creative talent or discernment that’s kind of a divine talent. IMO, you may have a creative talent but I feel like you’re learning more when it comes to people... who they really are, like you’re able to read them. I’d also guess that you have some type of life purpose that may involve helping people through... your existence or a talent... you could just be a person who frequently helps others. I do think it’s possible you have a talent... or skill that could lead to a very successful career... but I do want to advise you not to let anyone take advantage of you. 
Estafania oracle “chains, bondage, release” - this could also be about the past thing, b/c it also feels like the 8 of swords card, which is a lot like mental bondage, anxiety, fear, limitations you place on yourself. I feel like you have or are on your way to busting free of this...  and you have/need to release that where it belongs: the past, so that you can move on toward this next goal - but do so with more discernment than before - or well, you probably already will/have anyway. 
Energy oracle - also gives me this idea that some sort of new inspiration has hit you that’s putting you back onto the path where you belong, and toward a goal...one that’s more in line with your purpose/path.
Welcome - limitless magic can be about manifestation and guides showing up can be all kinds of messages or people who show up at the right time to teach you various lessons and put you on a path...
Chariot was back of deck, and that also gives me the sense of... feeling a lot more focused on something. Usually it’s a career goal, it’s determined, driven energy. It can even represent travel or sometimes home.
So intuitively I feel a couple things strongly - so all that glitters keeps nagging me and it makes me feel this is mostly about being discerning about people... I do think you’re also being asked to trust your intuition, as well, as in let it guide you to your right path. Maybe some goals seem good because of xyz (more money?), but perhaps they don’t/won’t feel right. Like, say this job pays super well, but it’s not a satisfying job, perhaps the cards want to say... if it doesn’t feel right, don’t let the superficial/materialistic veneer of whatever sway you. This goes for jobs as well as people. I feel strongly compelled to tell you that what you need to do most is trust your gut, trust your feelings, feel pulled to what EXCITES you and brings you joy, and when you go after it, you need to be determined and focused... 
The other message is again to acknowledge that any struggles or darkness have been there to teach you something about yourself - to discern what’s good for you or what you want or to prepare you to be strong enough or skilled enough to get exactly what you desire. I think that rn you are probably seeing some type of synchronicities or signs or even people are messaging you or being used as a means to convey certain messages to point you to the path, as well... 
To me these are good vibe cards so I would read these and think you aren’t particularly gloomy, that you are relatively optimistic and upbeat and when things do go off the rails, you typically get back onto your feet fairly quickly. The only thing I worry about is if there’s a type of pattern involved there if it’s people where the same thing keeps happening over and over again in some way, which is why you’re being taught discernment so that instead of it happening again, you can use your intuition to learn from it and avoid it, but maybe you’ve already done this - 
I do think midas/all that glitters are related to the goal tho... like the goal seems to be about... money or finances or nice things...  which nothing wrong with wanting... stable income and such...  just, yknow... be careful and make sure it’s really what you want.
i really really get a strong sense that you’re being guided and watched over at this time. like i know we all should have guides, but i feel like they’re super close and loud rn and really focused on putting you in a certain direction and have been working behind the scenes in very specific ways to put you exactly where you are or about to be in the near future...  like maybe there’s a particular song you’re attached to rn or keep hearing that gets you pumped about this goal? Or... music is part of the goal...  or maybe I just need to say they’ll especially speak to you through music.
What else can I say. Tarot numbers are 1, 9 which to me would be a message about the self and... spiritual philanthropy...  so again... it seems your intuition and relationship to spirituality or doing good in the world are part of this message. There’s also a 7, which is about lessons and searching for deeper meaning and connection, understanding about life... so it could be that you search for deeper understanding through... spiritual... the lifestyle or in particular you’re just a naturally spiritual person who finds connections to people and things in a spiritual way... sees deeper patterns in all sorts of relations to ... whatever. You might also be fairly lucky. 
In terms of color/chakras... well there is some yellow/gold, so solar plexus... maybe a bit of orange (sacral) tho it’s mostly yellow...  there is some indigo and purple so third eye and crown (your intuition and spiritual juju). And then a big blot of green in the midas card (heart).
This reiterates your strong intuition/spiritual abilities or connections... the green makes me think of the 9 in that... so you have spiritual talent or serve as a channel like priest card says but you may have quite a big heart (hopefully not blocked), but when we get hurt by people, we can close off. However, I think this shows that you’re rather compassionate and giving toward people, which perhaps might be way some of them can fool you from time to time.
And the yellow may be blocked or open as solar plexus is will, determination, confidence, well balanced emotions and health...  
You can look up those chakras online and see if they seem blocked or not, but the point is these particular chakras/qualities will be important to your path.
I would say it’s something like... your search for personal empowerment (solar plexus) and your path will revolve around your spiritual/intuitive side... and that you’ll also be led in the right direction by your big heart. Though this could also lead you to getting hurt or taken advantage of and would affect your solar plexus or heart chakras... so... anywho.
I feel like your solar p is actually okay b/c i get the sense from the tarot that you have the ability to get back on your feet and keep going forward as opposed to being like wow that past thing sucked so i’m going to live in a cave forever, always afraid to try that again bc i might get hurt... i don’t really see that here. But that’s not to say you haven’t ever or aren’t currently doing shadow work or haven’t experienced tough times. I just think you have a better mindset/stronger mindset than others to get through it and not be as negative.
In conclusion, keep up with that focused energy... if the goal feels like it’s in line with your intuition, go for it. Use your intuition on people and situations to make sure it vibes right. Be careful of situations or people that seem too good to be true or just... doing stuff for the wrong reason... and be really open to signs right now, particularly through music... and I think try to keep positive and stay high vibe, stay away from folks who aren’t... 
And that’s about it :)
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hiraethiisms · 3 years
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                                                   𝚃𝙰𝚂𝙺 𝟶𝟶𝟸
THE BASICS:
Full Name:  elena marie salvatore (nee; gilbert)
Label:  the healer
Nicknames:  lena, gilbert, doppelganger.
Birthday:  june 22nd
Birth Place:  mystic falls
Gender:  female 
Sexual Orientation:  bisexual
Occupation: doctor 
Moral Alignment:  true neutral
Tarot Card: the sun 
Goals / Desires:  since she is already a doctor and happily married, the only other thing is to have kids of her own but in a world and place that isn’t as dangerous as theirs 
PHYSICAL:
Height:  5′7
Weight:  121 pounds
Eye Color:  brown
Hair Color: brown
clothing style:  whatever is cute but also comfortable. lots of boots, tight fitting jeans and oversized sweaters when its cold and sundresses when its hot out
Left handed or Right handed:  right handed 
Distinguishing Features:  olive skin, long dark hair 
Tattoos:  n/a
Scar:  one on of her shoulders from when stefan was compelled to bite her, a scar on her palm from accidentally breaking a glass while doing dishes after she took the cure
FAMILY:
parents: miranda and grayson gilbert (john gilbert and isobel flemming)
siblings:  jeremy gilbert
children: n/a
others: husband, damon salvatore
FAVORITE:
Book:  the alchemist 
Movie:  pretty in pink
Food:  pizza made in a brick oven
Flower:  lilies
Season:  summer
Animal:  sea turtles 
THIS OR THAT:
Cats or Dogs:  dogs 
Mornings or Nights:  nights 
War or Love:  love 
Smoke or Drink:  drink
Coffee or Tea:  coffee 
Writing or Reading:  writing 
THOUGHTS:
On the dead coming back? well, without the dead coming back i wouldn’t be here. while i’m worried i may hurt the people i love i also am grateful to be alive again or.. undead? i don’t really know the proper terms here
Enemies coming back ? that part i could do without, there’s a certain doppelganger i’m sure is out to ruin me one way or another, it’s all she does since she learned of my existence 
Love At First Sight ? i believe that is very possible, yes
One True Love / Someone You Will Always Love ? well i’m married to him, so. i’ll always love damon he is everything i needed before i even knew i needed it when i was younger.
QUESTIONS:
What is their family history like? How does it affect them? How do they feel about their family? How does their family feel about them? my family history is insane. i literally come from a line of doppelgangers, every 500 years theres been someone born with my face and then my other families side is hunters of vampires. throw in some birth parents, adoptive parents.. that’s just scratching the surface.
who were their first love and do they feel the same now as they did then? my first love was stefan, he was there in a time when i needed it most and i wouldn’t change a thing about that relationship besides hurting him the way that i did in the end, but we’ve moved past that now, i do still love him but more so in a family kind of way now
Do they believe that a person can redeem themselves from mistakes of the past? absolutely, most people are able to redeem themselves and i’ve seen it with people i’m close to. however, some people choose to stick to their toxic patterns
How do they feel about death? Have they been significantly affected by it? i’ve lost literally every singe person i’ve loved at one point or another. both sets of parents died, brother died, husband died and came back, his brother did as well, i died myself. death surrounds me and it never gets better
What is one thing in their past they’re ashamed of? One thing they’re proud of? ashamed of burning my house down to the ground, i was grieving but it still wasn’t my best moment. im proud that after i took the cure that i took my life into my own hands and became a doctor like i wanted.
Pride, envy, gluttony, lust, anger, greed and sloth. If your character was a seven deadly sin, what would they be and why? i think i’d be a mixture between pride and gluttony, i indulge too much into things and do not like to admit when i am wrong.
PICK TWO:
lyric that describes your character best : I'm criticized, but all your bullets ricochet. shoot me down, but I get up. i’m bulletproof, nothing to lose. fire away, fire away. 
quotes that your character lives by : nothing is impossible, the word itself says im possible - audrey hepburn
fictional characters that your character can relate to : peyton sawyer
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Dear LGBT+ Mormons (especially youth),
I was in your position not too long ago. I know it’s hard and confusing and may seem the whole world is against you, but I promise it is and will be okay. You are taught families can be together forever, as long as they follow the exact rules and teachings of the church. You are taught that marriage is only between a man and a woman. You are taught that if you experience, how they put it, “same sex attraction” you can either remain celibate or get married to someone you will never be attracted to. You are taught to pray these feelings away and seek counsel. You are taught not to transition. Even simple things like coffee and tea or how you dress are restricted. Every aspect of your life is controlled.
I am here to tell you that that is bullshit. You are not eternally damned. You are not going to hell. You are not restricted to love who they tell you to. Mormonism is not the only way. You are not destined to an eternity of sadness. You are able to get away from the church and be yourself. You are totally valid. Your sexuality and your gender identity are so valid.  
I remember when the Supreme Court legalized gay marriage for the whole country. I was ecstatic, a step in the right direction and toward acceptance. Come that Sunday I was sat in church with the youth for a “special meeting about the recent decision”. The bishop sat up there and read a statement from the First Presidency saying that God’s word never changes. They did not support gay marriage before and they still do not now. “Same sex attraction” is a disease and they can help you get better. My first thoughts were rebellion and that it was bullshit but then I felt a pit of shame. What would my mom or church leaders think if they found out my sexuality or gender identity?
After this, I fell into a pit of shame for who I was. I spent countless hours trying to pray the gay away, quite literally. Days and days of hating who I was, begging God to change me. If I followed what they said, surely he would change me. About a year later, I met a girl. She was wonderful and we became best friend’s fast. She was the only person at church that I could talk to about anything. We were both very depressed and in general hating ourselves. Through our friendship we learned and grew from each other. I started to have a crush on her as I started to accept myself more. Eventually, she told me she thought she was bisexual and then later that she liked me. We spend months kissing behind the church and holding hands in church (which a leader later told us that she knew it “wasn’t a lesbian thing” but we had to stop because it made some of the girls uncomfortable.) The shame slowly went away and we both found ourselves, we broke up because she was moving across the country and we both found ourselves not believing in the church anymore.
Through this whole two years it was a whirlwind of shame then acceptance. I share this story to let you know this: you can’t pray away who you are. You can’t change who you are. You shouldn’t change who you are. You can’t achieve happiness when you are shaming yourself and in an environment of people who shame you or don’t accept you. Accepting myself and leaving the church has been the best decision I ever made for my own happiness and self love. I have learned to love myself through accepting myself, surrounding myself with people who love and accept me for me, not excepting myself to change, and believing what I believe in and not what my parents expect me to believe in.
You are valid. You are you and you can’t change that no matter how hard you try. Embrace your flaws, quirks, sexuality, gender, everything about you. We can improve ourselves as people, but we should not have to nullify or turn down who we are to suit other people.
Some of the things that make me the happiest or that I simply enjoy are “bad” or “sinful” according to the church:
- drinking coffee
-kissing girls
-being trans af
-being bisexual af
-believing in a different belief system than the church
-tarot cards
-premarital sex (oh no!! they think im going to hell!!!)
-dressing how I want
-supporting my friends decisions that don’t align with the church
-having friends outside the church
-loving myself for me
There’s so many more things I can’t think of, but feel great. If you read this and don’t get anything from it, please take this: don’t try to change yourself for the church it won’t make you happy. If you believe in God or any other deities great! You are accepted. A great page to check our for queer Christians is @queerchristianaffirmations ! You are loved and there are people that love you. Keep being you and loving who you wanna love. You can always create more love. It’s what makes this world a good place.
Love,
A salty LGBT exmo.
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simpstyle · 5 years
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January Tarotscopes: New Year, Better You !
Instead of a New Years Resolution, let’s see what the cards have in store for you!
ARIES
MARCH 20 – APRIL 20
CARDS: 3 of Swords Rx / 5 of Wands Rx
This month you're seeing the importance of tending to the seeds you've sown. Your investing in your emotional growth and grounding yourself into them after making an effort to completely disregard your true authentic feelings. You're in a phase where in order to level up, emotional maturity and investing in your well being is essential. This is the time to pay attention to your passion projects and investments to see whats working and what isn't. What seeds are sprouting and which ones seem delayed? Think about whats missing, and what gets to be added?  
This Month's Advice - Take a look at how your emotional wellbeing changes your perspective on what you put effort and time into. What would you put time into if you knew it would thrive and bring you the emotional fulfillment you've been hoping for? 
TAURUS
APRIL 20 – MAY 21 
CARDS: Strength/ 4 of Swords
Your strength manifests in the faith you have that things will work out for you this month. Don't buy into negative emotions and conflicting thoughts that show up this month as fears and insecurities, you've overcome them before and you will again. This is your moment to reflect, reset, and rejuvenate. Trust that the Universe has your back and that your struggles are there so you hone your power. Your stillness and you ability to stay calm through the storm is powerful, this is accelerating your transition and showing you how to better handle tough situations as they arise.
This Month's Advice
Transmute your triggers by staying non reactive. Thats your level up, and its time!
  GEMINI
MAY 21 – JUNE 21
CARDS: The Lovers/ Eight of Swords
Although you feel like your stuck between a wall and a hard place, understand that you have the power to make a choice. Will you continue to play the victim and give your power away or will you choose to come from a place of empowerment and do what feels right to you? Don't allow others to keep you stagnant and stuck, your intuition is giving you signs that theres more to the situation than what it seems. Choose your higher self and what your hearts desires are guiding you to do, if you feel like you need to leave a situation the cards say "HELLA YEAH!"
This Month's Advice
When you honor your intuition you honor yourself, the more you do it the more you learn to trust your inner voice. Theres something bigger and better waiting for you to see you're worthy. 
  CANCER
JUNE 21 – JULY 22
CARDS: The High Priestess/ 9 of Cups
You're being acknowledged this month for all you've created for yourself. The source of that has been your willingness to trust your intuition and understanding of the law of the Universe. You've had a feeling of anticipation for a while now as if something good is going to happen and it will! This month you get your wish fulfillment, and you're rejoicing in happiness and a feeling of peace and calm. "I made it, and I knew it is all I hear, so if you've been waiting for a confirmation this is it.
This Month's Advice
Stay optimistic, and trust your gut instinct.
     LEO
JULY 22 – AUGUST 23
CARDS: Knight of Cups/ Ace of Coins
Take a look at the duality of life and find the time to be gentle with yourself even when you're feeling intense and stuck in your moods. Embracing the duality of who you are is the key to abundance. No matter what happens in life you understand there is value in the trials and tribulations. The lesson learned through the struggle pave the way for new beginnings that stem from new ways of being that might just change your life.
This Month's Advice
Be careful with being overly self-critical this month.
VIRGO
AUGUST 23 – SEPTEMBER 23
CARDS: 4 of cups/ The Lovers
You've been dissatisfied with life because you're unaware of the blessings and whats been working. Work through your self loathing,  and choose your higher self, your heart. When you are living in alignment with your mind and hearts center, you'll uncover the zest for life you've struggled finding. The key to feeling better and working through your lessons is presenting yourself in gratitude for the little things.
This Month's Advice Focus on whats working in your life, let the sun shine in if you want to feel inspired.
LIBRA
SEPTEMBER 23 – OCTOBER 23
Cards: 7 of Coins/ Ace of Swords
Your patience has been tested but with purpose, you have so many break throughs this month and you've been waiting for this clarity for a long time. Emotional grounding comes from being non reactive, and understanding everything will happen at the right time and at the right place. The AHA moment happens when you surrender to the natural cycle and the ebb and flow of life.
This Month's Advice - Look out for synchronistic events and encounters especially surrounding career and personal advancements.
SCORPIO
OCTOBER 23 – NOVEMBER 22
CARDS: 9 of coins/ 7 of cups
This month you're trusting the power in your decision making skills. You're no longer doubting how capable you actually are and its showing through in the opportunities that are showing up for yourself. This is happening because of your commitment to how you want to feel and what you are working on creating for your life. Abundance and stability go hand in hand and its stemming from how you feel about yourself. You are capable and worthy!
This Month's Advice- Start believing in your ability to manifest, and manage positions of leadership. See how gracefully you juggle what used to overwhelm you.
  SAGITTARIUS
NOVEMBER 22 – DECEMBER 21
CARDS:Four of Wands/ Ace of Coins
There's something you haven't been wanting to acknowledge but the little voice in your head wont go away. Your intuition is telling you to look within and check your thoughts. There's a fine line between the illusions, and what is true and sometimes it isn't always clear but getting through the gray areas will help you make a decision this month. Learn to differentiate when you're afraid things will fail, and when you're absolutely sure of it. Success comes from courage and facing the fears around failure.
This Month's Advice -Assumptions and fear based mentality wont manifest the result you seek. Change the perspective.
CAPRICORN
DECEMBER 21 – JANUARY 20
CARDS-7 of Wands/ Page of Wands
What you're experiencing this month isn't happening to you, its happening for you. Don't take things so serious this month and learn to go with the flow. Im getting you guys will see opportunity where you were once met with adversity and that changes your perspective around the situation. You'll enjoy how you feel working through the process, and being okay with how everything is unfolding.
This Month's Advice Release the need to control and go with the flow of things. What is this moment teaching you when you release the need to be right.
  AQUARIUS
JANUARY 20 – FEBRUARY 18
CARDS: 9 of Wands/ King of Cups
Yes Aquarius!!! You're acknowledging how you feel this month instead of brushing it under the rug. You're maturing emotionally and are accepting how you feel about this significant individual. Despite the journey and how tough its been, you've pushed through and are finding yourself at the top. 
This Month's Advice - You're feeling good, and its oozing through your pores. If you don't have a certain person in mind, look for possible suiters because you're on the radar!
PISCES
FEBRUARY 18 – MARCH 20
CARDS: 10 of Cups/ Ten of Coins
You're seriously committed to your family, commitments and your long term goals. This month you're aligning yourself with the individuals that inspire you and keep you motivated. Congratulations you've met your soul family, and the ties are strong and loyal. These are the people who are here to show you everything you'll create for yourself and support you along the way. You've been consistent with staying positive in life, and the Universe is acknowledging you this month for all your dedication.
This Month's Advice Pay attention to the signs, and how it changes depending on the crowd you keep around.
  For more check out  @opalsaura
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February 24, 2020
Good Morning. 
I have been good. I talked to Slavik this weekend and he was saying I am the happiest I have ever been and this has probably been my best year in a while. Despite covid and everything, hes probably right. Were there some set backs with people and what not, of course, but I am better and my relationships are better. I don’t hate my job, I have met a ton of people through my hobby. I have been turning my hobby into a business. I found spirituality.  I have been feeling a little overworked this week, but I know I will feel better once I get these images uploaded and this week is over. 
I pulled some cards the other night asking about love, the card that came out made a lot of sense in terms of the process. Im not quite sure if I am there yet, but I have been feeling okay with physical touch, like I have been craving a hug, or as weird as it sounds, just resting my head on someones shoulder. I downloaded hinge, been talking to one guy I get along with well, so I added him on Instagram and we have been talking there, so I deleted hinge. Last night I finally admitted to the girls that I found this one guy attractive that our mutual friend is friends with. Turns out he already tried hooking one of them up with him, but hes not looking for anything serious, plus if I were to get at that, I would need her to say shes not interested and to go for it. He has a lot of videos online, as he has a podcast, so I have been watching those and learning about him, there has to be more than just a physical attraction. I am obsessed. I spend all night manifesting this dude into my life. Even continued into my dreams which was wild. I have put it into the universe. Spoke it into existence and now we see. I really want to do a follow up reading from last year, with the same lady, Need to see if she will do a package deal for the three of us. She said I wouldn’t get into a relationship for another year minimum and when i did I was going to have two options, so I want to see how my path has changed and where its now headed. 
I am happy with where I am right now. What would make me happier? Having someone to share time with, seeing my friends and family, and finding my true career path. There are all things that will come in time. I guess wish I could also expand my snake stuff. Again though, time. 
I have a shoot today, so I am going to go get ready for that. I will do a breakdown of my cards that I pulled later hopefully. I really want to dissect it. Okay so the cards I got were:
Cat Spirit: Claim independence and leave space between you and others in your life. The way to grow in relationships is to  have a healthy sense self-respect and self worth. When you walk with dignity, knowing who you are, self aware and willing to grow, trysting the value you bring, the world will mirror all this back to you in kind. Whether you say no to co-dependancy and enmeshment, live and let live, and practice taking risks as you wonder into new territory. Cat Spirit urges you to let your independent spirit roam free. Get ready to jump into something new, don’t worry because you will land on your two feet. Trust yourself. 1
Scarab Beetle Spirit: We can bring forward something extraordinary, seemingly out of thin air. Whenever you let your creativity flow through you, spirit reminds you that you have infinite potential. Spirit works with you so that you can feel replenished and vitalized as you make magic with what is at hand. Now is time for great optimism, for you can accomplish anything you desire nad your creative endeavours will come to fruition, miracles, opportunities, abundance and love will appear seemingly out of nowhere as you allow spirit to work through you and magically manifest what you need. 
Koala Spirit: Reminds us that life is not a race or competition. Chasing around every distraction can keep us from recognizing that we have all we need and that spirit will always be there with gifts to sustain us. Trust that by moving slowly, with faith in the abundance that is everywhere, surrendering to a power greater than yourself, you will be able to experience the manifestation you desire. as you take your time enjoying the riches available to you right now, sitting peacefully you begin to radiate the joy and abundance you seek. Spirit is here to help you discover happiness, pleasure and contentment - all gifts that are your now and in the future. Have faith in Spirits plan for you, know that you are loved and cherished. The things you are afraid of are no more, everything is temporary. 
Armadillo Spirit: Learning to set healthy boundaries.You may need to start saying no for to be in alignment with your intentions, even if they have been okay for you in the past. You need to learn where you end and other begin, what is your own, and what is not. Know your limits and understand that it is an empowering choice to say no to what doesn’t feel right. Be honest with yourself and what you really want. Be clear on what you are agreeing to, declare what your needs are, and say no as a full sentence. These are acts of respect and kindness to others, as well as yourself. Trust your body’s signals and you will know what to do. Spirit guides you in making good decisions that are grounded in a strong sense of what belongs to you and what does not.  
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survivorsunsetrodeo · 3 years
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Ep 9 | I’d Rather Make Moves When I Need To - Emma
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Okay, I am so sad Brandi is gone, but at the same time, it's not the worst thing for my game.  The good part of it is that we tried to make a move on Emma, we flushed an idol, and we weren't detected. I think this twist is actually super helpful in these moments because if you try something, and it fails, no one knows unless it gets leaked.
Another good thing is that Taylor's closest ally is now gone. I know that Taylor is super close with Ari, which is good, but I also want her to be super close with me. Not just for strategy reasons. She's also super cool and I like talking to her! Apparently she did tell JABARI of all people the vote was on Emma, so no wonder they knew how to idol tonight lmao.
Idk I feel pretty okay about my position in the game playing the middle rn I just need to not spread myself too thin and keep the targets in front of me. 
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Soooo Tribal went off without a single hitch. brandi went home despite playing both of her advantages and Jacob wasn’t even near getting voted out. The main clownery of the night happened right after tribal. Ali started going on about how he felt like Brandi didn’t deserve to go home, when there were people currently in the game who didn’t care. If you think she deserved to stay, maybe you should’ve given her your immunity? Or better yet, volunteered to go home? And while we’re on the topic of who cares, haven’t you either flopped in or just not submitted in multiple challenges? Since I was still on the tribal call, I asked him who he was talking about, even though I kind of had a good idea of who it was already. He said Emma. and since Emma wasn’t there, we are aligned, and I know she was going through some things, I felt the need to stick up for her. I found it pretty disrespectful that Ali would say that so it did make me a bit mad. I of course alerted Emma right after it happened because I feel like she deserve to know, and she confronted Ali about it in the call after tribal. I’m sure everyone knows Emma and I are working together now, but I couldn’t let her be dragged through the mud like that. I’m really worried Ali and Taylor, who I know are aligned, will try to target me now. I understand where Ali was coming from though. I’m also a person who is driven by my emotions and I tend to say stuff without thinking about it first.
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WELL all things considered that vote went pretty alright! i didn't manage to mist emma into using an idol for jacob so they could get blindsided, but other than that, things worked out pretty much how i hoped. jacob was saved, an idol (and lots of money) was flushed, and i can plausibly tell both sides that i voted with them even tho actually i voted ali for insurance purposes >:~) also we got major info about the location of the other idol when brandi didn't play it and it didn't go back into the shop, i.e. jabari MUST have it because there's no other possible place it could be. i know none of my people have it, and nic was so convinced that me/jacob did that i have to believe none of that group have it either, which leaves little old jabari who's been asking soooo many questions about everyone's funds and where items could possibly be. color me a little shocked but honestly kudos to her! now she gets to stay alive another round since that gun is an idol again.
other shop updates are that taylor's gonna buy something next round and so is dan probably, which will be great for getting them out of other people's hands and knowing for sure where they are. i can't believe i own shares in 2 of the 3 items currently in the game, how cute of me honestly. everyone else is now broke so that's delightful, i prob should've extorted myself for even more money so they'd think i was fully broke too but ah well what can you do.
i am a little worried about how ali's antics last night could potentially reflect back on me this round but i think i've done a pretty good job of covering my tracks there - i talked to both nic and emma immediately after and was like yeah i don't condone that behavior, and josh knows i wanted ali out over jacob because i got him to throw a vote that way with me, and obviously none of taylor/dan/jacob are gonna let me get targeted for that either sooooo i think i'm all good. once again, jabari is a wild card but i think i trust her a little more after my call with her yesterday and i don't think she would have the pull to do anything anyway.
so at last i can have a day of peaceful rest while i await these awful touchy subjects results! me taylor and ali are making a music video so that'll keep me busy for a while. overall feeling very grateful and blessed to not be stressed at this current moment in time!!!
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Not mr ali making me regret voting off brandi out should of been ali oh well no point in voting him out now tbh that would be a waste things i think are slowly getting better for me i am talking to jacob and ari more idk how to approach taylor because ik we on different sides but ik we may or may not need eachother soon i feel so bad about brandi she was probably the nicest person here i said this about megs but brandi for second chances.. Yeah i just need to think of something that will seperate my gameplay from josh and nic if im stuck with them eventually that means i could get myself voted off its hard to like make moves rn but i rather make moves when i need to make moves.
also maybe ali should of put his immunity on brandi and not ari >:)
i also hope i break the record for most wasted idols im coming for that record im also so nervous about the future of the game i dont wanna just follow ppl around but like i kinda fucked myself over due to reasons out of my control oop
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I just sent my nightly hellos to people and that’s already too much social interaction for me
I’m already fricken paranoid about this round and we haven’t even gotten immunity results ugh. I think it’s because I know I flipped that mastermind comp. like I really could have done much better than I did.
Additionally everyone was so quiet today so I’m just assuming everyone hates me and wants me to die. 
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am i playing a good utr game or do people just forget i exist? i've got a lot of good (but conflicting) info from Dan and Taylor and I want to sit down and compare notes with Ari BUT WHERE ARE THEY you can't expect me to remember all this by tomorrow. I feel like I have somewhat of a good relationship with everyone aside from Ali and Jabari and I feel like I've gotten a few info that I find personally relevant moving forward but I need someone to compare this with. I think I'm playing a much more smarter game than before.
[Tumblr Survivor Riau reference] I feel like I was in a position like this before where I had the opportunity to play a good game being in the middle but fucked it up and sent one of my allies home because I was vetoed by my actual alliance [end Tumblr Survivor reference] so I'm doing the same thing this time around but keeping my sources a secret. The only person I am 100% honest is Ari and I hope it's mutual. I obviously can't take Ari with me to FTC but what I need the most are honest opinions and legit information and i think both of us are providing just that with each other.
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ali needs to stop saying dumb shit to nic because it ALWAYS gets back to dan and i have to be like "omg lol im sure he didnt mean that" while running to ali and being like "hushhhhhh"
anyway i think the best thing i can do today is sit back and let everyone else tire themselves out scrambling and stressing!! it'll all resolve itself eventually and if it doesnt then oh well
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I wasn't going to be making a confessional because I didn't wanna get an OTTN5 edit and also I felt like it was obvious I was going home and I had nothing to really say. There is a tiny bit of hope now, and it lies with Jabari and Dan. If everyone is telling me the truth, I will be staying. And if I do, I'd love to create a 5-person majority alliance with me, Dan, Jabari, Emma, and Josh. It'd honestly be perfect. I really like them all and am comfortable with them all.
If I go home, I wont be mad or anything, I'll just be sad that I didn't really come across the way I had hoped to in this ORG. I feel like a lot of things didn't come across correctly, and a lot of things were just pinned on me that were outside of my control.
Oh well. Let me remain positive. This is me being positive :] (Also I'm forever thankful for having Josh and Emma as allies without them I would've gone crazy by now. Thank you for everything you do.)
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Power Rankings: ONE - DAN (+2) Threat: 8 (+2) Trust: 8 (+3) Dan’s at the top of the rankings this week because he’s in the position that I wish I were in. Despite losing Brandi, who was Dan’s #1 idled out by the minority alliance, he still was approached by the minority to vote with them. He knows each plan and he can decide whether he wants to flip or not. He decides who goes home this round. TWO - ARI (-1) Threat: 10 (+1) Trust: 9 (+1) Ari ranks #2 because they know everything that’s going on and they know it first. They’re the first to hear about any messiness or change to a plan. They aren’t included in it necessarily, but they hear about it. Ari’s threat level though is through the roof and hiding behind them as a meat shield is going to be key for my game. They should want to take a shot at Ari before me, and I plan to keep it that way. THREE - TAYLOR (-1) Threat: 7 (NC) Im starting to lose grasp and hold on my power as more of my allies leave. If the minority perception and gameplay wasn’t so awful I would have a lot more control over what goes on this round. Its just bad survivor gameplay to assume someone would never work with you because you voted their allies out. Because what they fail to see is that regardless of if im included in their plans or not, I still find out. I had 3 different people approach me that me name was out as I woke up at 9am this morning. It shows I have control, I just wish they’d include me so I had the power to deal with it rather than relying on others. FOUR - JABARI (+3) Threat: 3 (+1) Trust: 2 (-2) Jabari is here because she seems to want to give the minority.a chance. I don’t really understand her logic because regardless she’s at the bottom of an alliance. The one round where the majority wanted to count on her to prove she’s with us, she jumps. And she doesn’t even know that she’s completely fucking her game because of it. On top of that every suspects she has an idol. She only ranks 4 because of the information she is receiving, but she’s no threat because her gameplay is poor and everyone believes the rumour of her having an idol. FIVE - JACOB (+1) Threat: 7 (+1) Trust: 8 (NC) Jacob does know what each side is going to do, but unfortunately hes always the last to find out. Im not sure if its because of how late he sleeps in, or if hes everyones last resort but either way it’s not good for his power ranking. Jacob’s smart, hes going to be seen as an immunity threat sooner rather than later. SIX - NIC (+3) Threat: 3 (+1) Trust: 0 (NC) Nic is in 6th because hes the only one trying to steer a vote on the other side. He isn’t doing it successfully, but hes trying. If only he could put as much effort into challenges and he would trying to get people to save him. I dont trust him at all, he threw my name out. He has a little influence over Jabari, but that’s not too big of a success. SEVEN - ALI (-2) 
Threat: 1 (-2) Trust: 9 (-1) Ali unfortunately just doesn’t have the power he needs to get himself out of situations like he is in this round. When the name was between Ali and I it should have easily landed on me. But Ali doesn’t have the social capital that I do, which is why I had multiple people tell that side “lets do Ali over Taylor”. Not to mention Ali made a hugeeee mistake buying the dress for literally no reason. But I trust him I guess? EIGHT - JOSH (NC) Threat: 4 (+2) Trust: 5 (+2) Im starting to see a little fire with josh come out this round and im happy. Hes not willing to do anything about it, but the gears are turning in his head. I think our relationship will be important down the line but as of now he has no power and just follows everything Nic says. NINE - EMMA (NC) Threat: 0 (NC) Trust: 0 (NC) I literally don’t have anything to say about Emma. She doesn’t talk, doesn’t do the challenge, doesn’t care. Not worth my time.
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I feel like im not winning this game unless if nic goes and josh goes right after idk im feeling a bit bad how im playing i was planning to go balls to the wall but like i find it really hard to do that when i am a known goat for something i could not control i try hard to change what people to see but idk how to do it anymore im totally not gonna stab josh and nic in the back at this point i just cant write their names down.
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This vote is for all of the victims of the people that nic has voted off, nic is going home I know of it. All he's been doing has been working against me and for that ciao Bella 
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GOD. What a day. I was pulled back and forth about this vote by both sides and this vote.
Ari/Jacob/Ali/Taylor want me to vote Nic Jabari/Nic/Josh/Emma want me to vote Ali
Neither option is ✨great✨ for my game. But we can’t vote out Jabari for personal reasons so here we are.
I’m worried about idols and such, but at the end of the day, I can’t get too in my head. If the idol comes out as long as they don’t end up voting for me instead of Ali... we’re good!
I’m voting for Nic because I don’t fuck with people who try to make you feel like you’re gonna lose if you don’t roll with them.  Even on OG Pearl he didn’t take a ton of time to get to know me and even now all he wants to do is talk game. In comparison, TSL has known me two rounds and I know so much about her.
Obviously voting out ANOTHER OG Pearl probably isn’t wise, but at the end of the day, New Pearl and OG Beeho seem to be the people I bond with the most and trust the most. And I might be dumb, but I am enjoying their company and would be proud losing to any of them. 
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ts-akhmim · 4 years
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Episode 5 | “Wish me luck America” - Dan
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I wanted a swap, i practically BEGGED for one because i was ready to cause chaos, so i swap happens .... but its NOT good for me whatsoever because all the people i wanted to flip on and get out somehow end up on the other tribe, and to make it even better, what sole beauty do i get stuck with? connor. yet ANOTHER person lying to my face STILL TELLING ME I WASNT A VOTE OPTION...... just another fool on the list of fools who think IM the fool so this is an interesting dynamic, 4 original brawn, 2 brain, 2 beauty. off the bat it looks like those 4 brawn could be solid, so ive already been working to talk to the brains tribe during the one world twist, so being with autumn and duncan could potentially be good for me, obviously i dont know how theyre feeling but in a perfect world i want to allign with the brains. As much as i would love to vote out connor right away just to send a big old middle finger to the alliance that included him over me in it, but im not sure that can happen. My only hope right now is that there's a crack within the brawn, if there is i can try and get in good with connor to maybe see about uniting with the brains and taking out a brawn, even if it meant 4-4 and going to rocks, im here to play so id absolutely do that. If the brawns arent that tight however, and i can just flip one to want to work with me, i can use that as an opportunity to start a new alliance maybe with the brains and a brawn to vote out connor/anyone else not in our numbers, not sure yet, theres so many scenerios game wise but i think especially in the last 24 hours ive talked a lot of game with people, so i need to calm down on that and get back to personal conversations to try and estabilish trust with anyone i might need down the line, if we even go to tribal which im hoping we just dont, because then not only am i safe, but i get to hopefully see someone on the other side go home, and i would love for it to be one of the frauds amir, augusto, or kendall. but its also terrifying since connor is such a wild card like what if he flipped to the brauns or the brains linked up with the brawn to pick me off? basically if im gonna survive this swap, i need a little bit of luck, a little bit more strategy, and some more connections to get me through, i thought thats what i was doing before though and it clearly didnt work too well so buckle the fuck up because i have no idea where we go from here 
lmao remember a few hours ago when i said i hated this swap because it didnt give me much opportunity? well little did i know was all i had to do was bat my eyes a little and opportunity appeared right before me! meaning that, ive been trying to talk to and connect with some of these new people, ive had decent talks with liam and ali mostly, and i was trying to keep game talk minimal up until LIAM out of no where says to me, "oh i just realized someone on this tribe voted me out in a past game and i voted him out" so BITCH the second he says this all sorts of bells and buzzers are going off in my head like spill the tea i need to know!! and what does he say?? it's CONNOR. BITCH cue the choir and let the angels descend from above because im in HEAVEN hearing this!!! there's 16 people left and while i really think we have a strong tribe to win challenges so we may never go to tribal, if we do ive already begun shoving connor so far under the bus there wont be any time for him to get up by the time he realizes what hit him. I'm giving you Miss Rosa in orange is the new black running over Vee REALNESS SWEETIE. VROOM VROOM WATCH OUT BECAUSE HERE I COME. My favorite quote of all time is: the enemy of my enemy is my friend, and that's absolutely what ive been playing up here whether i can actually trust these brawns or not is beside the point, because right now i know for a fact i cant trust connor, he's still lying to me telling me i was never a target, so i have no use or even want to play with someone who thinks im an idiot. On a tribe of 8 you only need 5, and i am absolutely not opposed to setting myself up to be in a position where im the swing vote, if i make sure the brawns feel like they need me, and same with the brains, then i should be essentially... ok? until a merge??? maybe unless everyone here is lying to me too, most likely because im not a good player so im probably being duped dfhkasj I've also been working hard to try and let people in on the narrative that the beautys have this majority alliance and are a threat, because i want to do as much as i can to put a target on their back and get them out, while also opening up to hopefully let people know they can trust me, and i want people to still think im weak so im also going for that pity card playing it up how no one over there would talk to me and saying how bad it was, i shouldve watched what i said though because i did foolishly let Ali know about the tomb and how to crack it, i didnt mean to and i wasnt thinking we were just having such a good convo and while i do like talking to him, i have no idea if i can trust him with that so great job at my dumbass for giving myself more competiion in the tomb .... i went back in tonight and ill be damned there's new questions so i SHOULDVE kept my lips shut and i couldve had it to myself, but whatever, at least if he finds it he remembers who led him there, i also dont want to rely on any idols or advantages, let's do this the old school way and get shit done, and get these people out of here, one false beauty at a time, until im the last one standing!! and aj... we still trust aj he can stay, but the rest they can go and then they can lemme know how that alliance works out for them.
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Woooo! I made it to the swap!!! My swapped tribe is actually pretty cute bc it’s a lot of the people I really talked with during the chaos round. I am concerned about the 4-2-2 split we have being an issue, but I have to trust my new former relationships will at least make me not the first person targeted. I’m so relieved to be swapped with Jakey because Jordan and Ali are definitely scary players and having them on the other side with the potential of being voted out (and not having to do it myself later) is honestly good. Jakey is more of a MOTR player and someone who I actually enjoy talking to about game and non game stuff so I’m excited to hopefully position him as my number 1 in this game. With all THAT being said.... Devon and I have played before and I literally blindsided him while working with him so I’m worried about that. My other concern is that me and Amir go way back... I love Amir, I’m just nervous about his ability as a game player. I’m just praying that we can win some comps in the swap so I don’t need to address any of these issues fksmjsjsjs. Wish me luck America. 
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the way i'm going to be the last person in the challenge who determines the tiebreak... which could keep me safe but seal jakey's fate... god this is so upsettingggg
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I meant to do this earlier, but quick recap on my thoughts on the tribe swap. First, I'm elated to see that I have a majority of the Brawn on this tribe. I have Jordan who I'm closely aligned with, and I have both Liam and Ali who I've been working with and have a good game relationship with. That's where my initial excitement ended. Because the Brains and Beauty who I talked to the most during the One World Day - Devon, Scott, Kendall, Augusto - all ended up on the other tribe rather with my closest ally in Jakey whereas I got two Beauty who I hadn't talked to and two Brain who, while I was optimistic about, were more concerning in terms of their thoughts about me. But I'm going back to that social game I've been working on and I truly think that this swap is going to work well for me. I think I've specifically been building some good relationships with Adam and Duncan that will help me not be the target if a Brain/Beauty coalition forms. But now I just need to see if I can get through this damn tomb and go from there.
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Whew! It's been a few days since I made one of these and boy do I have a lot of tea to spill! So after voting out Devon, a twisto's twist comes into play where we all go to one world and vote someone back into the game. I lowkey had a feeling this would happen... Like I really spent all day getting the HIGHEST score in that immunity challenge only for Devon to get voted back in 15-0-0. Nothing really important happened here except that Austin did a shitty campaign job and Lovelis just.. disappeared. Like bruh, you really don't want to come back huh? And then we swap tribes and of course I'm stuck on Thoth AGAIN!! I've accepted that I'm cursed this time around because I... am tired of being here. But, Duncan and Autumn are on the other tribe so this gives me a good opportunity to not only rebuild my relationship with Devon, but to make new allies moving forward. Personally, I think I need to cut ties with Duncan and Autumn and find new life. I realize that they are much closer to each other than they are to me and I can't work with that long term. The way they approached Devon for his vote out really proved it too. When it comes to rebuilding my relationship with Devon, I'm not gonna lie it's much more difficult than I thought it would be. Like I basically told him that the reason why I voted him out was because he snitched on me to Duncan and told Duncan everything I said to him on our call. I basically said I was hurt by that because I trusted him and then he went behind my back like that and it wasn't cool. Especially since i was considering letting it go to a tiebreaker challenge too! So then he tried to phrase it as "I would never lie to you, I had your back all the way to the end" and I'm kinda just like... okay but your actions speaks louder than your words. And you taking the action to approach Duncan and tell him everything I said to you wasn't cool. However I made it very evident that Duncan/Autumn are much closer then we thought and i think he gets it. I've slowly come to realize that he's the perfect goat to take to the end because he really lacks at the relationship building portion of the game. However, I need to be able to trust my goats and right now I don't trust Devon. He told me about the idol as a sign of trust, however he hasn't found the blog yet. (backtrack, Duncan shared the blog with me so I've been idol hunting, and now I'm just telling people I had no idea when they ask me about it LOL). So I might tell Devon I found the combination, but at the same time do I want him to have the idol? Not at all! I'm happy that this swap brings me to a lot of people that I can potentially work with. I know that Duncan and Autumn originally wanted to work with beauty to take out brawn, so I'm really happy that I have 4 beauties on my tribe. Out of the beautes, I really like Augusto, Amir, and Kendall. AJ hasn't spoken to me at all tbh... like we barely talked. Kendall and I talk briefly but she told me straight up that her/Amir/Augusto were a trio and that definitely doesn't make me feel comfortable. I'm just like "okay, let's leave this thought in the back of my mind for later." But I've spent a lot of time talking to Amir and Augusto, and I can see myself working with them long term. Augusto and I called for like a whole hour and a half, which is beautiful that we got along well so quickly. I like how they both plan to keep their word and don't like to make fake promises. It shows that they're genuinely good people and I think they're my kind of crowd. So I definitely want to work with them through the merge. I also wouldn't mind going to the end with Augusto too (Amir already won so I don't want to make that promise to him LOL). When it comes to the brawn, I gel most with Jakey. I would go to consider him my new #1 right now. I don't think I ever had a #1 on old Thoth mainly because Duncan/Autumn were so close and Devon is just.... being Devon. Jakey told me about the idol stuff which is great! Personally, I already knew about the idol, but to pretend to be shocked by it and go forward with it was the best move for me. But Jakey and I seem to be the smartest and most focused people here, so I need that. He gets me and is on my level. I'm considering taking him to the end with me if it comes to that just because I want to be loyal this time around. That's why I'm happy than an alliance of Me/Jakey/Augusto/Amir/Kendall was made because I want to stick with this 5 all the way to the end. And I'm happy to already be in a majority alliance because it means I can potentially get to the merge. I just hope everyone knows that I'm with them and want to stay loyal to them going into the merge. Because I would love to be able to say that I'm 5/5 on making it to the merge. It'd be a shame to end my last tumblr season as a pre-merge boot. In terms of this vote since we lost the challenge AGAIN, I'm open to voting out either AJ, Devon, or Dan. I know people want to keep Devon around I'm happy with that. I'd hate to vote him out again after that last round, but also told people that I would do so if it meant that I would solidify trust with them in doing so. Which leaves us to Dan and AJ. I'm open to either of them going that round, mainly because I haven't spoken to either of them that much. I would perfer AJ just because he's a beauty and I'm skeptical about keeping all of the beauties around. At the same time, Dan can be a little aggressive so I also wouldn't mind getting rid of the negativity within the tribe. So many decision to make!! I just hope I make the right one. 
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I take back everything I said about feeling good about the swap. No one is willing to talk about the vote with me so I guess that means it’s me??? I don’t know I’m just not feeling good and my gut is pretty good most of the time so we’ll have to see.... I just like don’t fuck with people who don’t wanna talk?? Like why play???
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I am little fucked. Honestly if I was going to get voted out I would like it to be because of my #bigmoves or #smartbrain but nope it's cause of 2 minutes. And that's infuriating! Like I work my ass off in basically every other challenge! I drew the tribe flag, I took the lead on the word puzzle thingy, I got a reasonable number of scavenges!!!! And now I'm going to die. Like a lil bitch. I'm trying my best not to struggle cause voting is like quick sand, the more you panic the more you sink in. But logically I don't have much to worry about. Devon is willing to work with me, I already have two solid allies, and Jakey and Scott have both reached out. But the back of my mind is... bad. I'm so stressed out and Pissy. Fuck Dan. Fuck his stupid face. The only thing keeping me from throwing him out is I don't want people to have the perception that the beauty tribe is a unit. Oh yeah we are voting out AJ even though he probably has an idol which isn't great for me because he could probably get wind of that thing that's happening where people want to kill me and get on board and proceed to kill me. That was a mouthful but I don't have to be eloquent when I'm going to fucking dieeeeeeee. I'm barely holding it together. Help me Survivor Jesus. 
Augusto, 1:02 PM K so Dan said that he heard AJ would be a unanimous vote didn’t tell me who but he said that that person could just be projecting what they want Daniel Disbrow go fuck yourself. Projecting my lily white ass. 
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Whew i love when things work out for me. This tribe swap went great for me. I feel very confident about my position on this tribe. I am good with Ali, Tj, and Liam all through seperate links to myself which im hoping can keep me as a centralized figure on this tribe. Ive formed a very good relationship with Adam so far who definitly feels on the outs of the beauty which is great. I thought i could be good with connor, but hes kind of been blowing me off so idk, he could be a target if we lose. As for the brains on my tribe Im talking more to duncan than autumn, but im gonna work on forming a stronger relationship with her on the chance were both at merge which i think is likely. I feel bad for Jakey and dan, two people I did want to work with, however I would be okay if they left as it would lesten the target on me at the merge with less brawn numbers and a larger beauty group to be scared of a group against. Sometimes you got to sacrafice pieces in chess and if they lose it sucks but ill move on. Im optimistic about moving forward through this next phase of the game.
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wow i cant believe i almost DIDNT make a confessional for this round but here we go: not much more has happened over here since the swap, we absolutely did perfect in the immunity, so we wont be going to tribal, which is cool because im guaranteed safety and now i can just spend my time trying to work on these relationships that i need out here if im gonna make it a couple steps further and plot my revenge against the false beautys and make the moves that are gonna benefit ADAM and no one else. The original night of the swap i found myself having longer convos with the brawns and letting them all in on the tea about how those false beautys have a majority alliance and how they were plotting against me for no reason, so last night i was talking more so with autumn/duncan individually and they also asked about tribe dynamics so guess what, i spilled the tea to them now too, and they seemed to believe what i was saying, which granted, life on old hathor wasnt HORRIBLE it's not like people were like LETS JUST POINT AND LAUGH AT HIM ...but this new tribe dont know all that, so im absolutely going to be hyperbolizing and over-exaggerating the situation completely still because that's what i do best, i have a strong personality and a way with words so if i can paint the narrative to look better in my light, i absolutely am, and i mightve got lucky with connor here because other people are telling me he's hard to talk to, which makes it 10x easier for them to believe me, because i am still telling the truth, he's one of them, and he's clearly a snake lying right to my face so im making sure they know he'll lie to theirs too. i dont want to get to confident with my postion though whatsoever, because these are all good players and im just a dumb bitch so odds are, someone is playing me and i probably look like a fool but whatever, i only know as much as people will tell me so either way i just have to go with the flow in a sense, whether im the one steering the ship or just the clown aboard, is TBD. i also found it QUITE pleasing to see how for the other tribe, kendall is the one who messed up and cost them the win, however i know she's got her little puppets with those other false beautys so im not sure if theyll take her out. Looking at that tribe, id be happy with almost anyone going but the biggest plot twist of them all is ..... i think i want jakey to stay? me and him had a good talk at one world actually, i began planting seeds with both him AND kendall about each other so i might have inadvertently pinned them even more against each other, unless they put 2 and 2 together and realize i was kinda just telling them both what they wanted to hear, i didnt think id want to work with jakey this game but now that i know i cant work with those false beautys, i might need him to stick around and do damage to them over there for me but really, i dont give a shit who goes home from them, aj is the only one of the false beautys im not 100% against yet because he is my friend, and maybe we can still somehow work together from opposing sides to keep each other safe but who knows, and jakey staying would be good for me because he's a threat and potentially could be on my side again (unless he was just lying and wants me out BAD then uh... he can go but hopefully not because i need that group broken up more than i do him gone even if he is after me) im also trying out a new strategy ive never used before........ i made my skype icon a selfie of myself, now let me make it clear, i absolutely DO NOT think im that attractive, years of low self esteem have made that nearly impossible for me to believe, but im starting to feel myself a little!! i think i would give myself at least a 5/10, so its definitely a reach but im really just hoping by seeing the real me maybe that helps people wanna talk and open up to me more? either that or it will do the opposite and scare them away oop. but ive had good responses so far? i got a "whew", a "whoa", and a "oh my..." from different people so um... i think that's good dfhuakj??? at this point in the game, i have to identify my own strengths and weaknesses and go from there, because clearly im not meant to find the idol every time i go to the tomb i flop, im just not meant to be an idol queen, but i wont give up!!! im gonna try again later tonight and hopefully find it, or at least see for sure if someone else has found it and that's what you missed on akhmim! (from my very singular and most likely delusional perspective) 
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I love Amir and Augusto. Like not to sound like a sentimental little bitch but I would kill for them. I have been the worst these past couple of hours and here they are all supportive and shit. I talk a big game. Like I consistently declare my villainy and keep pushing for #bigmoves but I will literally cry like a baby if I had to ever do anything to them. So I've decided I won't. I still intend on winning, I'm just not going to do it with their blood on my hands.
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Well...IT FEELS GOOD TO BE BACK! I was expecting to 'Slither' my way back in, but clearly didn't imagine myself coming back on a 15-0-0 vote. If you had asked me about who I felt GREAT about prior to the swap, I would have said Jake and Augusto, so it's nice to have them on Thoth with me. Going into the swap, here are the headlines: 1. Scott/I are back on the same tribe. He clearly doesn't trust me like he did before since I told Duncan about me knowing they were targeting me. Can we build that trust back? 2. OG Beauty vs the rest. For some reason, OG beauty is willing to vote out AJ and ease everyone's paranoia. We could have just as easily gotten rid of Dan, but whatever. 3. Alliance chats. I was told that Kendall/Amir/Augusto had an alliance chat, and it doesn't help that apparently Scott hosted Kendall early in her TS career. I need to make sure my connections stay strong enough moving forward  
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I finally learned the system to find the idol and it’s been found in the new tribe. I really hope Scott takes the time to find the Thoth idol. Firstly May I say the daddies are reborn with Devon being able to re-enter the game which is amazing! Unfortunately we got split up and now they face 4 beauties and 2 brawns on Thoth and autumn and I got to come be on Hathor. Adam spilled the tea about the Hathor 5 and its looking like Conor will be the first out if we end up at a tribal. I’m so happy to be off of Thoth. It was like a sinking ship and that tribe is cursed. On the flip side, for the first time this game, I DONT HAVE TO GO TO TRIBAL COUNCIL!!! YEEEHAW!!! I feel so grateful but also know if they lose 3 challenges then we’re losing Scott or Devon which would be horrible. I don’t know how comfortable I am with my position as it stands but I’m just grateful not to lose and probably feel most bad for Scott. I hope the daddies can survive this swap and perhaps make it back together come merge 
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I really haven’t said shit huh gfhjdksl WELL, tons happened last round like someone coming back into the game and me getting to meet everyone finally! Devon returning was the best case scenario as him and I created a really weird yet good bond which I’m thankful for! Autumn and I meshed so well, Duncan and I bonded quickly, I also bonded with Scott/Jakey/Dan, and then had good convos with TJ/Liam M/Jordan/Ali so that was cute. We ended up swapping into 2 tribes of 8 afterwards which wasn’t TOO bad especially considering who is on this tribe like I got crazy lucky. We have 4 Beauties, 2 Brain, and 2 Brawn on this tribe and the other tribe has 4 Brawn, 2 Brain, and 2 Beauties which is a thing. But yeah, I have really high hopes? My connections here are strong personally so I want to just build on that. 
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following the austin #blinside, we were BEANBOOZLED again and told that austin, as well as lovelis and devon would be pining for our votes to stay. all the tribes ended up on one beach but the initiative for the beauties was clear: austin could NOT come back. love him and all but after boldface lying to him and voting him out.. it just doesn't add up, right? so, the vote was really a matter of lovelis and devon, but then it just became of matter of "okay devon's coming back point blank" since lovelis wasn't really active. this didn't stop austin, however, from going around and throwing us under the bus, telling kendall her name was going around, outing the original plan to austin, all the while assuring us he was "beauties strong!" i respect the hustle but it ain't me! i decided not to lie to to him and told him upfront he wasn't getting my vote, little did i know it was going to be 15-0-0 for devon to come back. the perks of the one world twist was the fact i got to mingle with everyone i'd been excited to see from jordan pines to autumn! it was also a clear front for the fact that we'd be swapping right after, which we did! thankfully, the swap worked out for me perfectly. augusto, amir and kendall are all here with me and i got along with devon and jakey great! i also talked to scott and we bonded as well, and dan and i tried to recover from amnesia over a game we played a few years ago. i don't think i was put in a poor position at all, and in a must of confidence, i don't see myself going home like.. at all unless things change for the worse. the challenge came and went, and apparently one mistake cost it all but it didn't really matter to me because i have kendall's back and i know she has mine, so there was no chance i was gonna let her go over some two minute slip up. however, that was enough for dan to target her after we lost the challenge so the sexy procrastinators (basically leaning tower of penis bar connor) are counteracting by voting dan! do i feel bad because dan also asked if we could work together? hell yeah. do i feel REALLY bad? not really! he's a very nice gentleman, however, i'm pretty much on good terms with everyone on the tribe (and have solid allegiances with half of them) so i'm put into a rock and a hard place! i will say though, besides that, things have been really quiet compared to how things were on original hathor. there was always conversation going, even if it wasn't game, so it feels WEIRD when you're not talking to anyone within the hour. does that make me nervous? absolutely. am i assuming that there's an ulterior plot against me? more than i should! i just need to get myself together though and stop freaking out, what happens happens and if the that plot is indeed true then they got me gals! 
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i’m me having high hopes for our tribes and us losing badly… the delusion! That being said, I oddly feel safe? I have my trio with Amir and Kendall (where I have solid duos with both), a secret duo with Devon, Dan and I have this Seychelles thing going, AJ trusts me I think, and then I’ve connected well with Scott and Jakey on a personal level so that’s fun! I’ve been telling every non-Beauty that I do genuinely want to stray away from playing outside of tribal lines because alliances made out of convenience are not as strong as alliances made out of connection. I just want to pretend myself as a very fluid, easy-going player/person in hopes that these players want to scoop me up for literally anything they want to do. My ideal boot order for this tribe would be AJ, Dan, and Jakey. AJ leaving opens up the game for me as it means I stuck to my word as not wanting to play by tribal lines, Dan leaving is mostly to appease to others but also because Dan could be dangerous later on, and Jakey is who I REALLY want to see leave because he has been the main person who has gotten and spread info on this tribe and he strikes me as the most threatening person so removing that before a merge is KEY. But yeah, that’s where I am at! 
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I definitely need to step my pussy up in this game… like I feel extremely well about how I’m playing socially (I’ve been in tons of alliances, have gotten to really KNOW everyone I think, have been calling people for hours on end, have gotten information from all directions, etc) but I need to be better at talking game with people. Kendall and Amir have been doing extremely well about getting information out of Scott and Jakey respectively because they initialize game talk with them to do so and I personally struggle with that? I will say, I’ve been really good at getting people on my side to tell me things in the first place but I want EVERYONE to give me the tea like… I got my cup ready for all the tea so spill it please (‘:
I know I’ve done a super bad job at narrating everything that has happened this round but that being said, I haven’t done a bad job this round in the slightest. A sis really 1) established a connection with every player on my tribe [as in, I have an alliance with every single person in some capacity] 2) I am a part of the majority alliance 3) the people on the “bottom” feel good about me and have told me things 4) I’ve gotten close to getting to the end of Thoth’s Tomb which is awesome 5) I feel safe amid some messes this round [like Kendall telling Scott about her, Amir, and I being a trio which nnn] 6) I’ve honestly tried to downplay my gameplay to people by narrating my past seasons to people on call and explaining how I’ve been betrayed by my closest allies so I want something genuine and different this time AND also continuously asking my allies for “help” on talking to others to build even more trust [Amir told me he’s glad I’m in this game because I’m the only level headed one, Devon told me he trusts my judgements on anything, etc]... so yeah, a bitch might be doing that? 
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Sooooo I think AJ is going tonight? Which is fine because he’s throwing my name around even though I actually was interested in working with him lmao. I was hoping Kendall would go because she literally does not talk, but I’ll take what I can get. Jokes on me when I get blindsided 
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jakey just told me he's voting for me.. so yes i'm freaking out and yes i'm convinced i'm going home you CANNOT tell me otherwise https://66.media.tumblr.com/376a5e921389df0e5d37a54da9734e04/ebea8f0b6df920b0-57/s640x960/e1f351d79a9ea08058418a032c97026926156df5.gif 
kendall and augusto sat me down on call and basically told me it was over https://66.media.tumblr.com/376a5e921389df0e5d37a54da9734e04/ebea8f0b6df920b0-57/s640x960/e1f351d79a9ea08058418a032c97026926156df5.gif
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I hate everyone lmao. I initially started saying we should vote Ken Doll, or whatever her name is, before I knew AJ was throwing my name around. And of course someone threw a vote on Kendall, and now I have Ken Doll in my PMs being like “ballsy how you still voted for me” that’s funny sis, I don’t even know how to spell your name. 
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Not me almost putting Thoth on the tribe option lmaaaaooo old habits die hard. I would just like to take this time to thank the Academy, the hosts for swapping me well and allowing me to succeed in a way I never could in Thoth, and my new tribe for being both wise enough to listen to me when I come up with a plan and solid enough to deliver. Being immune? It's a lifestyle and I really missed it Ok so things are going well on Hathor (knock on wood)? I've talked to everyone, we're in a good spot, and I'm not worried about anyone.... but I am nervous but we'll come back to that. I feel fantastic about Ali- this is our third time playing together and every time we see each other we just pick up right where we left off, both as friends and allies. But it's really special this time around since we've both won a main? So we're in a unique boat that no one else in the cast is except Amir. Basically now we have each other's backs more than ever because our stakes look different as well as our threat levels compared to everyone else. I also discovered that TJ and I went to the same fucking COLLEGE??? When I say I'm gagged ugh. So yeah I think there's a new level of trust and kinship there since we share something so major that's not game related. And I think both of us are kind of alone? So that helps bridge the gap even more Ok now for all the other menses.... I have always been nervous about Jordan Pines simply because he's Jordan Pines. I know how I am and I know how he is so him being so tame and quiet the entire game is spooky to me and I don't buy it. I'm trying not to start shit obviously but I think it would be risky to wait until Jordan goes full Jordan before making a move but we'll leave it for now. Iiiiiii am no longer sure what to make of Adam and Connor. I actually really liked both of them the past couple days and was considering working with them but it has come to my attention that Adam has been telling everyone the same story about him being on the bottom of the original Hathor and that everyone needs to get rid of Connor since he's apart of that block. When I thought I was the only person with the tea, I was like YEAH ABSOLUTELY but then hours later Duncan tells me the same thing and then today Ali not only tells me that's what Adam said but apparently he said it to Liam as well. So I'm like SIR- tea is only special when it's private. You trying to get the entire tribe to rally to kill one specific person based on something that none of us can fact check is messssyyyy. I know there's some truth to it because Austin also was very adamant that Hathor couldn't be trusted but the whole thing is convenient to me, that Adam is hellbent on getting Connor out and really playing up the victim angle. And the gag is, if Connor ever goes, where does that leave Adam? Cause if you're willing to campaign this early over something that specific, what will you do to target the rest of us? Like ok we're all comparing notes now but that's cause it's pre-merge. Iiiiiii don't know if Adam needs to make it to merge if he's so generous with his spiked tea. And then that leaves Duncan, who is my dad yes and who I've been with the whole game but I'm really trying to diversify and look elsewhere. I don't wanna hurt Duncan but I do get this impression that he sees this as "our" game and that's why he's very keen to know who I'm talking to, who I trust, am I looking for the idol, do I need any help, etc. To the point where I feel like it's gonna become a liability situation, like because we're friends I'm SUPPOSED to both protect him every single round but also approve everything by him and take him to the end. And just so we're clear my game is mine and mine alone. I didn't come into this game to play for or with anyone and y'all know I have too much Sagittarius in my chart to let a man control my game. And no I'm not reaching because Duncan was tripping about me having a good relationship with Devon, to the point where he and Scott made a side group with Devon before tribal to convince Devon to vote me- mind you all of this came to my attention AFTER tribal and from Devon, even though it was Scott and Duncan's idea to vote Devon in the first place. Soooo explain to me why Duncan is questioning my loyalty when I'm voting out another ally over him and then you wanna go do side shit even though the vote was locked and already unanimous?? No ma'am I'll fuck you up. I really killed my bb to protect my dad and he over here trying to micromanage and teach me lessons. Sir there's plenty of game left don't try it. ALSO DEVON BB I MISS YOU YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT SCUNCAN SO PLEASE DON'T DIE ON THOTH
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Okay I literally don’t even know where to start with this entire round, so ughhhh lets just make lil blurbs and word vomit all the thoughts in my head. Okay first, alliances. Me kendall Augusto. I trust these 2 more than anyone else in the game, but Kendall is a mess and a half and has accidentally leaked so much shit or purposely idek I know it’s not malicious, she’s super loyal she’s just silly. She told Scott that me her and Augusto were a trio, which like why tf would u do that ??? anyway, Scott told jakey who told me. Next is me aj kendall Augusto which is a cover up to tell aj to vote dan because the actual vote is aj, but no one wants aj to use his idol. Everyone on our tribe is like sure aj has the idol now, and I’m trying push that too, because I have it lmfao and I don’t want people to know I have it. Next is the new main alliance, me kendall Augusto Scott and jakey. I DONT KNOW ABOUT THIS AT ALLLLLLLLLL, everyone wants to vote aj out, and I’m telling Augusto and Kendall, like y’all realize we are giving them the opportunity to 4-3 us next round? And kill the beauties ?? Like how is that smart ?? But at the same time, getting rid aj could cement Scottie and jakey. It just depends if they try and make a move against me Augusto and Kendall next round if they think we are a trio. However, me and Augusto have planned beyond such and in that case, I have ammo. Let’s check the armoury: - Augusto is insanely tight with Devon now, we can use him as a weapon - jakey ratted on dan to Kendall and ratted on the majority alliance, we can turn dan against jakey. So if Scott and jakey think of pulling a fast one on us, I’ll tank their games so fast and make sure they go down with us . Lastly , I’m fucking terrified. Because with this vote, if jakey Scott Devon and dan team up and vote me just to do it, I’m going to go home 4-3-1. I’m putting my faith in this alliance and my gut is telling me to trust jakey and trust Kendall and trust Augusto. Basically, there’s huge pros and cons to what we are doing right now. However, assessing the situation, if I put my foot down hard and force all 4 beauties to stick together, it’s a bad move for my game . Jakey will be mad, Scottie won’t trust us, and I’d be forcing Kendall and Augusto to do what they don’t want to do, and aj is an ally who is almost never online. It’s simply not worth it. The better move is let aj go, create these bonds and take these risks, and secure that I won’t get caught about the idol And then merge is a whole other fucking story, Ali and autumn and Duncan and Jordan must be dealt with. 
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Nothing is chaotic. This is weird. I don't feel in danger anymore and could clearly get away with making the merge. Connor has left me on seen once already and I've voted him out before. Target numero uno, come on down!
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pupseok-blog · 7 years
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nsfw alphabet ; kim taehyung (2/7)
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aftercare: aftercare with tae consists of him laying you on his chest while his hands stroke up and down your back. it’s not often that the two of you get kinky enough that you’re in need of pain pills and a bubble bath or anything but it’s essentially skinshipx100. which is a lot bc tae may as well be the king of skinship??? he tends to keep himself inside of you until it gets uncomfy because he likes the closeness. also you feel good around him.
body part: tae’s favorite body part on him is his eyes, for sure. i mean look at them they’re wide and beautiful and he has doe eyes how could you Not. his eyes are sparkling beauties. and he knows. his favorite body part on you are your hands. on a super soft note he loves your hands because they give him comfort. like he squeezes your hands as if to remind himself that you’re actually his. but on a naughty ass note he loves the look of your hands wrapped around his cock for one. and for two, he loves it when you’re so far gone, you’re desperately grasping at him, nails digging into his arms or back.
cum: when you two first began dating and fooling around tae used to be so worried about cumming on you oh my god. BUT FOR GOOD REASON some people don’t want cum on certain places. it makes sense. the first time you gave him a blowjob he came on your face and he was Freaking Out. he thought he’d pissed you off and he was apologizing profusely but you had to tell him that you didn’t mind it. even still, though, he doesn’t like cumming on your face. he prefers your chest or tummy.
dirty secret: tae LOVES phone sex. its his favorite thing to do with you especially considering how busy bts is in general and how you two can’t see each other all that often. he loves sexting, he loves sending (and receiving, ofc) naughty videos and pics. he loves listening to you get off because he thinks your moans are the absolute sexiest thing
experience: i don’t think tae has that much experience at all ,,,,, like IM SORRY but i think his only experience is porn and years of jerking off. to be blunt. but he makes up for inexperience by being a risk taker. he’s super open to trying almost anything.
favorite position: i think tae’s fave position would be you on top. he likes the intimacy of being able to hold and cuddle you in his arms while rolling his hips into you. he has easier access to some intense making out when you’re in his lap and that’s the shit he likes. tae likes making out ok.
goofy: you would think that tae would probably be goofy during sex but he knows when to get serious. most times, during sex between you two, there’s really no time for ‘goofy’. i mean, his hands would be busy, his mouth would be busy. he has too much going on to be cracking jokes necessarily but there will be small giggles.
hair: see this is gonna be common within all of these nsfw alphabets (and the gag is i don’t wanna like not mention it but i also don’t wanna repeat myself???) but like i said, korean people usually don’t give a fuck about pubic hair. so i expect tae to be the same.
intimacy: tae is Very intimate during sex okay. like. very. his hands are all over, his mouth is all over, he’s hugging you to his chest and he’s groaning and chanting over and over that he loves you and that you’re his everything. aka tae is Also a sap.
jack off: you know, tae loves jacking off but see he loves it most when he’s doing it for you over facetime or something. like unless he’s really reeling and he needs release now (look at all that alliteration) most times he’ll save it for you bc like i said he loves phone sex. so he’ll film himself, and send it to you its kind of a kink of his ,,, SPEAKING OF KINKS
kink: i think tae has a bit of an exhibition kind of kink. he likes filming himself, he likes filming you. he likes getting naughty in Slightly public places. like in a hotel room high enough that someone could probably look up and see you two fucking but not well enough to recognize who it is. or underneath a blanket in the car with the rest of the boys after a concert or something.
location: you know what tae’s favorite place to fuck you is on the living room couch tbh. like i said he likes to be in slightly public places and he really enjoys the thrill of someone either walking in on you two or someone hearing you two. besides, it’s like y’all can’t sit and watch a movie without hands lingering.
motivation: what turns tae on is the moment you’re out of the shower walking around the room looking for clothes to put on. when your hair and body is wet with a towel hanging precariously off of you, he cant take his eyes off of you. after shower sex is a common between the two of you which leads to you having to take a second shower which is why the boys never really invite y’all out anywhere because it takes Forever just to get out of the house
no: now i did say tae was a risk taker and he likes to explore and try stuff but he just does not enjoy extreme bdsm. at the most he’d participate in stuff like spanking and maybe arms being tied behind backs or something like that but. nipple clamps, flogging, any of that. tae’s a soft okay he couldn’t bare to see you in any sort of pain EVEN IF you liked it
oral: binnnncnncnchhhh tae loves oral he loves giving oral he has the biggest oral fixation. he just loves having his tongue on you. he loves the power he has over you with just his tongue and lips. he loves that he can have you literally quivering with just the tip of his tongue. he definitely prefers giving.
pace: i think tae’s pace is slow and hard. like his strokes are rough but still slow. like he SLAMS into you and with each thrust its just perfectly aligned and your head is swimming and it just feels great. he likes to go slow because you’re just so warm and he loves it and he wants to savor the feeling.
quickie: tae doesn’t like quickies imo. he prefers to take his time he likes it when he can slowly unravel you if you know what i mean. he isn’t adverse to like bathroom handies or anything like that though. but does that count as a quickie? ???
risk: tae is a huge risk taker tbh. like i said what he lacks in inexperience he makes up for risks. he likes learning so honestly you could come up to him with Almost anything like “tae can we try this?” and he’d be eager to! 
stamina: because his pace is slow to start with he wouldn’t tire out all that fast. i mean i think he prefers to have made you cum at least once before he even penetrates you so at the veeeeery least you’ll have came twice with him. 
toy: tae doesn’t mind if you own toys (they make for rlly nice videos; he knows this) but he lowkey gets jealous of it. like not actual jealous, that would make no sense. but if you tell him you’re about to use a toy and you start to tease him about it he may get a little miffed about it. just a lil bit.
unfair: does tae like to tease? probably . i don’t think he realizes that he’s teasing you though. at least not until you’re screaming at him like ‘taE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD JUST LET ME CUM’ and he’s like ‘oh shit sorry my bad’
volume: tae is such a groaner oh my god ,,, like. imagine the scene. you’re going down on him and he just has his hands knitted in your hair and his eyebrows are furrowed and he lets out this deep, guttural groan and he tilts his head back and it goes STRAIGHT to your crotch bc you’re like fuck. tae has really hot moans and he’s so unashamed about it he’ll be as loud as he likes
wild card: tae is a switch with a massive oral fixation ok. he always has to have his mouth or tongue on you in some way. he loves kissing, he loves giving head, he just loves the feeling of having something in his mouth. also heck you guys hes a switch ok. some days he wants to plow you into the bed and other times he wants to be plowed. he lowkey loves being dominated too. ok this was like 3 headcanons in one ill stop there
x-ray: listen it isn’t always about size it’s about what you can do with it. y’all are gonna think i’m saying tae’s small i swear im not. i think tae’s size is average, but thick.
yearning: tae’s sex drive is kind of…for lack of a better term all over the place. he’s young and hormones are wild and it really doesn’t take much for him to want to pull you into his lap y’know. 
zzz: tae sings you to sleep almost all the time. like after sex cuddles are the two of you wrapped up in each other while tae sings softly in your ear (he sometimes rocks you to sleep when he’s feeling super lovey-dovey). he usually waits for you to fall asleep before he goes but on rare occasions, he knocks out with his face laid in your chest and he just looks adorable
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mamonthemoon · 5 years
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5′s in Tarot:
Fives in The Minor Arcana represent change and the need for change. The energy of Five changes the order of things for either good or bad. Unlike most other cards in tarot where the Upright aspect is deemed to be more positive, the Five changes this pattern by being more positive when Reversed. Five just has to be different, or difficult! When Upright, it can be rigid and narrow as it resists change or struggles with it. When Reversed it becomes all-embracing and accepting. However, because Reversed Cards can be extreme, the conflict of the Upright can become intense. Alas, due to Five’s overriding erratic nature, both the Upright and Reverse aspect can bring great extremes. The orientation of Five dictates the manner in which it deals with or approaches change. The change brought about by Five is often unexpected or chaotic.
After a period of stability, building resources, consolidation and preparation, the Universe shifts gear and jolts the Four Suits back into mainstream life once more.  Change is needed to shift them out of individual ruts, mind-sets, lifestyles and behavior.  Up until now, they may have felt somewhat in control of life and had a certain idea of how things would run for the rest of their journey.  The arrival of the energy of Five throws curve balls at them from out of the blue, some traumatic and destabilizing.  Some may have felt the energy of Five building over a period of time and are not totally surprised by the turn of events, while others remained blissfully ignorant of the rapidly approaching upheaval in their lives. Like a runaway train, Five comes hurtling down the tracks, eager to cause as much disturbance as possible. However, every cloud has a silver lining, even the Five Cloud. What is one person’s misfortune can turn out to be someone else’s gain. Also, without Five, the Suits would never fully appreciate the oasis that Four and Six offer, or the sense of achievement gained in the Ten. Without challenge, the Suits will not progress and evolve, the full human existence not truly experienced.
- Truly Teach Me Tarot
So I have three 5′s here: The Hierophant as SELF, the 5 of Swords as HIGHER POWER, and the 5 of Cups as ALLIES.
This makes sense to me.
The Hierophant’s stance, to me, looks like my self preservation of NO. Holding his hand up- no more.  That is what I see.  I will look into it more..
5 of Swords, yes I’ve decided to abandon everyone and go it alone. Then, again leaving psycho man and walking away with nothing but myself. The facial expression on the guy, I have seen this card before and felt he was wrong perhaps, as it looks like the other two people dont appreciate his “me be the winner” attitude.. it looks like he is greedy or unkind and doesnt play well with others, like a bratty only child who wants the toy to himself. Now I see Psycho’s face, smiling during conflict, while he dominates and hurts me on the inside, me feeling completely defeated and weak and done.. and him smiling at moments, pleased that he is stronger than me and feels he is winning somehow, and I couldn't possibly crack a smile if I tried with all my might. So as a higher power, I tuned in to what to do, and felt it best just to let him “win” and walk away preserving my safety. Chaos of 5.. yes... horrible argument exhausting.. asshole.. arguing for no reason really, other than he cant accept I needed rest he just wants his way and bullied me and as a result, my love disappeared- he beat it out of me.  Then he was angry because I wouldnt love him.  He really thought he would dominate and win.  He really got very greedy, as I gave him MY ALL and put an extreme amount of energy and resources and complete devotion on the table.  He experienced a taste of heaven, due to me, and our alliance- but mostly because of me and who and how i am and how i dedicated myself completely... he seems to think he could squeeze gold out of me by force, i dont know, but I do know, life was going really good and looking up for him since he started interacting with me and it continued to get better for him.. but as for me... I gave everything and lose everything too.  All I have is myself, walking away, I took myself, and Im sure the loss resulting from his extreme appalling actions has hit him hard.  I doubt he is smiling right now.  I am enduring great suffering, and have no money, no car, no nothing at the moment... but I do have support, from the homeless shelter, and strive to make the best of every situation and seize opportunity out of challenges.. which brings me to the third 5 card..
5 of Cups, as Allies. Cups represent emotions, feelings.  Here I am with a bunch of battered women in a homeless shelter.  My solace is in being understood, accepted, helped, and in the company of others with similar and differing struggle. I have people helping me, even though it is just a little bit, I am extremely grateful.  I mean, I am suffering through panic attacks in the morning, dry heaving, nausea, extreme anxiety, a female health problem, and shit on my right hand that appeared in three spots appearing differently for each spot.. the day of the major argument/altercation. CHAOS of Emotions but mostly my nervous system.  I dont feel chaos in my mind just my body.  I am very sad for how hard I have worked, and where I am now.. I am very sad everyone I align with doesnt really give a shit about me, and not only do they not contribute or give as much as me, WORSE- they fucking hurt me and ruin my life, or, more benign, are friendships I devote myself to while they just fucking sit there basically, not trying or striving for much more than their routine existence, and I am always striving pretty hard, or forced to rest because I HAVE strived so hard.
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survivormarmoreal · 5 years
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Episode #8: "The fajitas are truly guiding me" - Matt
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OMG i made it to the merge. Im so happy but now let the game begin.
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im so sad. dennis was such a king. and to be taken out by nick... like idek what to do with this merge. ppl i want to work with: nathan, maynor, brian, anna?, matt? idek if i wanna work with brian its just i like meeting new ppl NNN i wanna work with sharky too. but like nathan loves nick apparently. like... no ty!!! nicole... keaton? no ty! my preferred boot order is just keaton. nick. nicole. thats it idc!!! i dont wanna work with like og absolem tho bc theyre all tight without me but the other options arent good either EFKJDSAHKJ. i am waiting for redemption island twist pls and ty although my luck jaydne comes back NNn well these are initial thoughts woohoo
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PHEWWWWWW I MADE MERGE BITCHES!!!!!! Honestly that tribal was so fucking cracked and all kicked off in 20 mins at the end with nick revealing he had an idol. and YEET i was so close to playing my idol as well. The fajitas are truly guiding me (even tho i am eating them tomorrow for lunch and I am very excited hehehe) Brian, myself and sharky are gonna align (tho not telling about the idol tho) so woooo lets go merge!
I hate my life. a forced self vote? no thanks. UGH TIME TO DIE!
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WE FUCKING MERGED! And I got rid of Dennis. Which I do feel slightly bad about it but it was time to make a move. I playing loose this season and I'm going to see how far it takes me. I have alliances with Maynor, Brian, Nathan, Annabelle, Matt, Nick, and sort of Nicole so that puts me in a pretty good spot as long as I don't overplay and show my cards too soon. I've got to walk the line very carefully. And ngl careful is not my strong suit.
Ok now Let's rank my mergemates. 1) Brian- husband. 2) Matt- second husband. 3) Maynor- best man at my double wedding to Matt and Brian. 4) Annabelle- my fave underrated queen. 5) Nathan- I love him but check back in a few rounds ok. 6) Bryce- we barely talked but he loves Chi Chi Devayne so...I love him. 7) Nicole- ...every season needs a purple edit 8) Nick- cool kid but I'm sooo bitter about wanting him gone 3 tribals in a row 9) Keaton- who?
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Well, merge is finally here and i get to reunite with Sharky. Which is great because he was my duo from the begining and now i have Keaton as my other duo.i also have Bryce as well. Nathan wants to work with keaton and I so thats good and i believe he’s tight with Annabelle so shell come along as well. Thats already 5 with me is 6. As long as none of them are targeted first vote and others are. Ill be sitting in a good spot. From here the first vote, i wouldnt mind voting out Nicole. Only one to yet to talk to me besides saying hi.
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WEELLLLL!!! I merged, ladies (and lads)!  I cannot believe it, but I have made it!!  I think I know what my strong points are right now in my game and I just have to keep playing on them.  I'm a lot stronger socially now and I want that to continue going into the merge.  I have allies in every single little aspect of this game, and I want to ensure the people I'm not working with go first.  So less than half of these hoes better watch their backs!
Now that I've merged and have freedom with who I want to work with, I'm definitely going to try and solidify my quad-some with Sharky, Nathan, and Annabelle as a final 4 alliance and also make sure that my other final alliances (one with Bryce, who I just met up with, and then one with Matt) also are stronger than ever before.
I usually do like cast run-downs and... idk... I haven't yet in this game, but I guess I will now going into the merge!!
Annabelle - A queent!!  I absolutely love her and wish that a trio of Ariana stans (with Marie) could've gone through!!  I can't wait to strengthen my bond with her and for us to slay this game together! Bryce - I may have just met Bryce in game, but I've known him for a little bit!  We have never really had a full-on conversation, but we have talked in passing and in some League games.  I've talked to him for like... 30 minutes so far... and he's already a top person in this game for me.  Love him! Keaton - idk him, but he's already trash talked Marie to me... so .... bye ! Matt - I adore him... he's... an angel!  I see myself working with him for a long time in this game, and I have to hope he feels the same hehe... Maynor - eh!  I like him, but we don't.... click... so if he goes home... he goes home... :S... Nathan - LOVE HIM!  He's so funny and so nice and he says we have a final 2, but girl... if we get to final 2 together it's by sheer luck because I shoreeee as hell know he's going hard or going home.... and I'm not playing that same balls to the walls type of game! Nick - LOL OK??? Idols replace social play and gameplay ig!!! Nicole - I just wish she was more active because I'd love to really put all my trust in her, but I don't really ever talk to her! Sharky - ANGEELLLL!!! Das my game hubby... I adore him so much... I really thought I was going to go into this game wanting to fuck him up with a lawn mower, but here I am putting all my eggs into his basket and trusting him completely... I hope I'm making the right decision!  I know he's a big threat, but I just lahva him a lot! Ugh..
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This challenge is very interesting. Im just hoping that I somehow get enough points to get the high amount. Immunity would be great. Still working out who i could work with and who i would target. I know for sure that im going to be with Keaton and Sharky. Still dont know about the others yet.
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I do not want this immunity. There's like weird touchy subjects vibes. If I win it means a lot of people wanted me to get immunity so I'm well liked which will translate to "Threat". I told the jock destroyers to give me negative items. So hopefully if my other allies give me positive scores it will even out to a smooth 0 and I can stay relatively under the radar.
So I went idol hunting and I got closer than I had ever gotten before. I could just tell. So I gave Brian the info and told him where I went wrong. And he didn't find the idol but he DID find a steal a vote advantage! So Brian and I are getting a nice little tool belt around our waists. Now we just need to get all these people to do what we want.
Everyone is being really quiet. But thats okay because this gives Maynor and I a great opportunity to strategize. To my surprise he threw out Nicole's name! Which is great. It might be too soon to go for her because I've been talking Dinah strong for a few rounds now (even though I voted Dennis out). But it's still good to know that she's on his radar. Now the goal is just to set up a F5 alliance that Brian and I can ride to F6. Maynor and I still have The Scream Team alliance and I'm loyal to that. So if I can move forward with Maynor and Brian then I can just fill in the others as we go.
Okay SWIFT UPDATE. Maynor brought up Matt's name and I was basically like "Um...I don't want to do that" and then discovered that he doesn't think Nicole has his back at all. Which would undermine any Dinah strong stuff. And I'm not going to stick my neck out to save her over a vote on my side for a few more rounds. Especially if she might flip anyway. Hmm…
Now I'm getting a chance to talk game with Anna! This night is really picking up. Unfortunately she seems to have some animosity towards Matt. Why does everyone hate Matt? I think he's bloody awesome! Oh well. She also isn't a fan of Nicole or Keaton so I can direct her target that way for a few votes and for now we seem to be on the same page minus the Matt thing.
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Sharky and I are still up at midnight. We came up with a tribal vote plan which is awesome. The target tonight is going to be Nicole. I feel like shes a threat and needs to go. Sharky and I created an ideal final 5 which is me, Sharky, Brian, Matt, amd Bryce. My side alliance is Keaton and Nathan. On the outs is Nick, Annabelle, and Nicole. We are saying that Keaton said Nicole’s name and that Nicole said Keaton’s name. But main targetbis Nicole. Hopefully this plan works and Nicole goes tonight.
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Things are falling into place baby! So Maynor wants Nicole/Keaton/Matt out. He thinks he can get Bryce on board. Annabelle also wants Nicole/Keaton/Matt out. I know from The Jock Destroyers Alliance that she (and I) have Nathan's vote. Anna also says she wants to work with Bryce. And Bryce told her that he feels close to Maynor. (I'm realizing Bryce is a HUGE social threat and I'm not going to be able to keep him around for too long but for now he's a number on my side.) Now, both Maynor and Annabelle also love Brian. They both also know I can bring Nick to the table because Nick trusts me. So right now I perfectly situated in the middle of a 7 person voting block. Am I a mastermind?
CLASSIC ANNABELLE. I set up this whole majority situation and told her to choose Keaton or Nicole and we can make it happen. BUT SHE WON'T CHOOSE. I love her but she always does this. She's so about being quiet that she refuses to ever make a move. Last time we played together she said I was a bully and never asked her what she wanted. Now I'm trying to be a better ally and listen to her moves AND SHE WON'T MAKE ANY. So frustrating.
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Having Keatons name out was good cuz now he wants to target Nicole because she is the other name thats been thrown out. My alliance of mkn is helping get the votes for Nicole which is great.
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so the names thrown out are keaton or nicole and its looking like nicole is gonna go bc ppl think shes a better player bc she gets far in tumblr games which like i guess is tea but its just sad that meta has a factor :( esp when shes like irrel in this game noah fence KJFADSHKFJAS. and like maynor prob has f2 with keaton.. but idc i guess she ghosts me all the time so w/e. im just hoping next round we can get like someone whos actually a threat out.
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I WON IMMUNITY which means I made single digits!  I'm so happy with myself... I didn't really do much to deserve it, but I'm so happy I won because it means I can be a little more ballsy this round with throwing out names and whatever!
I'm thinking of voting Keaton out as a sort of revenge for Marie, but Nicole's name is out there, too, and I just really want to make the right move to launch my game into the next round in an even better spot!  I feel like the top of the world right now, and I want to keep that high.  The immunity challenge showed that even though I think I'm a fucking mess, I'm doing well enough socially.
As for that, I want to quickly add in that I love all my allies so much.  Sharky just helped me find a vote steal power which will be so useful for the long run of this game, and I cannot wait to use it to hopefully slay.  Nathan and Annabelle are angels and are also really nice for me to bounce ideas off of.  Bryce is just amazing to talk to and I really see him in my longterm plan.  Matt's another person I see in my longterm plan.  Ideally, this is probably my top 6... and I've since grown closer to Nick and we are working together "for the sake of Sharky", but I think he's more-so a side piece for me in this game!
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So....I’m pretty certain I’m leaving because nobody wants to talk of anything of substance with me. It’s hard because I know I deserve to go, I haven’t been in a place mentally to give everything I need to, to this game. But that doesn’t mean I want to leave. It’s just hard, Dennis was my number one ally and now that he is gone it’s gonna be hard to reform my trust and alliances with everyone. Oof. It’s alright. Hoping that someone can use me as a vote about now but, don’t think that’s a possibility.
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So I am keeping VERY quiet about my disadvantage, as I don't want anyone to know about it and jump on a bandwagon to use it against me! Like no thanks I'll pass. It looks like it'll either be Keaton or Nicole, would much rather it be Anna but she's immune smh. As long as my name ain't mentioned I'll be Gucci I hope. REEEE
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Now that everyone is awake it's time to put in some work to execute the plan Anna/Maynor/myself made last night. We need to get everyone on board with voting Nicole. But I also need to make sure Nicole feels safe just in case she has an idol. I'm going to talk to Matt and Nick. As long as they vote Nicole we should be solid. I'm also going to start an alliance chat with the OG Dinah members so that we can talk about strategy and make sure Nicole feels safe with us. Then as long as everyone is telling the truth (cause no one ever lies in Survivor) it'll all be good.
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Can i say that Sharky making a fake alliance chat with Nicole when we are planning on voting her out is very cold blooded. Like honesty doing it to try and throw off her scent of the vote is perfect.
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I’m so glad sharky seems to be much more transparent with me. I’m really excited to see how this goes tbh I feel like we’d make a good pair. We be played together before and I thought he would be made at me for like wanting him out in canadienne but yeah I’m excited for merge!
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Okay the alliances just keep piling up. It's definitely going to cause an issue later on. But for now it's good. And the newest one, The FB Bois, is one I actually do plan on staying loyal too. I really trust Matt and Brian. I like them both a lot and I want to work with them. Hopefully they feel the same. F4 with Brian, Matt, Maynor is my goal.
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We are coming close to tribal. Its nerve wracking cuz it looks like nicole hasnt scrambled so she might have an idol. Im going to see if my side alliance would vote for Matt (keaton and nathan). Just in case there is an idol played. But as far it looks like Nicole is going.
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For once my name hasnt been a top priority! its crazy... I really dont know what to do about it but im loving it so much... lets just wait though until I get out in about 30 mins...
Nicole is voted out 6-3-1.
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