#im very much afraid

[applestruda]

A quick s9 pearl design

#waa #i wanna do the same thing im doing eith grian where i give pearl different insect wings #the downside is that im very very unreasonably afraid of all insects #so finding references will be painful #ALSO THE URGEeee #i wanna draw all s9 hermits but its so so much to commit to #i think i need to be hit over the head with like a newspaper roll to stop #hermitcraft #hermitcraft fanart #pearlescentmoon #pearlescentmoon fanart #hermitcraft s9 #my art

[ganondoodle]

utterly random late night panic thoughts but

if you read my zelda comic and like it i love and appreciate you but i really do need to be upfront about it being very much a self indulgent enemies to lovers story with a villain at the center that has done bad but isnt bad at his core and is struggeling to come to terms with the fact that he doesnt actually want to be the evil beast he and almost everyone else believes he should be

yes im one of those people ... fake villain fans or something ... i think .. i dont know the rules to that ... q-q

#ganondoodles talks #i thinks its in part the time thats making me suddendly panic about that #like i often see posts from people that are like fake villain enjoyers make the guy into a good guy #and real villain enjoyers are those that like him bc he kills people #or making fun of or generally seeming very agressive towards people that redeem villains #and i have no idea if id be counted among them bc im kinda doing it #yes he killed people but no he doesnt like it and doesnt want to #im one of those cringy softies that are like .. but what if villain ... good #of course im trying to make it make sense and with alot of extra written lore #like i made an entire world up just for demises backstory #but im undenialbly afraid that some people will tear my comic apart once they realize i made him not all that evil #again i have pretty much read no fanfiction and am unfamiliar with alot of common fanfic tropes and stuff so #i got no idea what is commonly understood as the wrong kind of villain fan or soemthing #I DONT KNOW THE CRINGE RULES I JUST HAVE LOTS OF BLORBO THOUGHTS #i need to go to bed

[birdsong-warriors]

I don't want to talk about this much, but it may affect page uploads.

Saturday night, I was assaulted and strangled by my brother. This is not the first time he's done this, but it was severely excalated this time. I deserved it. Honestly, I wish he'd succeeded so nobody would have to deal with my shit anymore. I'm still very much in crisis mode, and I'm so sorry if I disappear. I'm praying I can continue working despite the situation, but this may warrant a short break.

I'm so sorry for any inconvenience this may cause, and I'm even more sorry I'm bringing this up at all. I need to stop talking from now on, honestly. I just wanted to communicate why I may poof. I don't know. I'm scared, and I can't do this. But I have to keep going.

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.

#abuse mention #im not so afraid to use that word now #but i still feel so much guilt #it must have been my fault #im a screw up #all i ever do is ruin things and bring people down #anyway sorry ncksncjd #not cat #important #notice #i cant do this #i cant #ask to tag #suicidal ideation #im so very tired

[skitskatdacat63]

Cannot stop thinking about how Fernando was the first one to hug Seb after Monza 2008:

#two men who are not afraid to hug with both arms sjfklfl #but seriously fernando especially is always going full in on hugs(rather than the typical one handed) and i respect it #BUT GODDDDDD THAT HE WAS THE FIRST!!!!!! LITERALLY MURDERED ME #ive literally watched this race before and i didnt even notice #i think i wanted to see if there were pics of them from before 2009 and came across this and was so OH????? #fun fact if you look at my gallery from during the past gp + #its literally a mix of sad reaction pics and vettonso pics. what singapore does to a man. :') #but god i feel so abnormal about this hug. its just veru sweet to me okay!!! #vettonso is fun bcs theres not as much content so every little bit is very precious and important to me <3 #likeeeeee how close they hug each other and the way theyre still close when they pull back to look at each other!!! #i wonder what theyd be like if they hadnt been rivals. but tbh on the other hand their animosity is why I like them ! #but ofc very sweet to see them when the slate was blank bcs then im like hmmm how long until 'fuck you my boy' happens #well! you guys know theyre my brainrot nowadays :D #watching 2010 will be fun bcs its literally primetime for all my ships #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #vettonso #we do a little bit of f1 #2008 italian gp

[panncakes]

stuck thinking about when day gets crowded and overwhelmed on his birthday he calls out to gee of all people there to remove him from the situation; and how when day tells her he wants to be alone she makes sure he knows she wants to understand him and he can talk to her (not to help him or to fix things for him; simply to understand him) and when day reaffirms a boundary she accepts this and doesn't press further. he's her friend and she cares for him but he's still an adult and she has no problem treating him as such and i think that at the moment she is the only one from day's past who is actively able to do so

#last twilight #gee best girl #i know disability is difficult on loved ones as well and it is very easy for those closest to you to fall into pitying and babying you #but gee has been working very hard to not let that happen to her friendship with day #she is immediately ready to keep teasing and playing with day whilst also quick to adjust to the new aspects of their relationship #she wants to learn how to guide day through the badminton court to take over from 'his mhok' and is more than willing to take day #to the bathroom in the bar but when day assures her he can handle it she doesn't infantalize him #she immediately invites day to the bar without any hesitation and then continues to invite him to her game because that's #an important aspect of their friendship #and when he shows up she isn't afraid to joke around and tease him #she's extremely good at not treating him like a broken piece of porcelain whilst also quickly taking cues in how to adjust where it is #necessary #im glad day gets someone from his past who doesnt need as much time as his family to readjust to his new normal #and it is also an incredibly good parallel to how bad augustus' assessment of the situation is #last twilight the series

[grennseyelashes]

It's never not funny how personally Stannis takes it that Jon chooses not to be legitimised. Like what do you MEAN you don't want to, through circumstances you never predicted, take up your deceased brothers mantle and right the wrongs of the realm 🥺? Jon hate Stannis?? UwU????

#stannis baratheon #jon snow #im sure people have addressed it before but i STILL think we're overlooking just how much stannis looked up to jon #partly just cos from learning how to get along with all kinds of people at the wall #jon was actually way NICER to stannis than hes used to people being #so he's fond of him (in a way his very scrambled brain cant compute lol) #well stannis. im afraid thats just not jons problem. try being less obnoxious. maybe ease off on the immolations a scooch.

[howlhawk]

my spidersona is me if i was like three thousand times cooler

#spidersona #spidey oc #spiderverse #across the spiderverse #into the spiderverse #spiderverse oc #spiderman #marvel #oc art #superhero oc #character design #stanley does art #disclaimer they diverged from me hard and fast so im literally nothing like them whatsoever #except for a mutual interest in birds i guess #their goggles dont emote so they always use a super chipper tone when in costume so they dont appear scary #but theyre like 5'4 so i mean scary is relative #outside of costume theyre much more neutral / more chill not nearly as peppy. except for when talking about birds #they are very quick to point out yes they KNOW tarantula hawks arent spiders. but the pun was RIGHT THERE #also theyre afraid of bugs. especially real tarantula hawks #those things are fucking terrifying!!!

[blueiight]

claudia still gets infantilized by media surrounding iwtv despite this being core to the tragedy of her condition

i think shes always been infantilized & ppl dont see the merit of her arc bc ppl rly only care about female characters in relation with romance or if they are children [or someone’s child of sorts?] in so far as they relate to the men rearing them. [cue 5001 lestat-claudia webweaves]. claudia is both selectively infantilized & excessively adultified whenever convenient to character/s [somehow both a ‘child interfering’ and both powerful enough to ‘turn louis against lestat’] nd to a certain extent by the fandom too. speaking of the show here too - show!louis now wanting claudia as his child is never disseminated for what it is in relation to louis (how he wanted children, and how hes forcibly exiled from the public sphere & makes do with the quasi-domestic) or claudia (in her want for a companion in immortality & wanting to understand the origins of their existence. in both the book and the show its claudia who initiates the question of ‘who made lestat/vampires as a whole’) but rather ppl render show claudia inert solely as a fictional moral bludgeon to character bash louis or make stuntin like my mommy/daddy posts with lestat. i was thinking too the other day how people often talk about iwtv in the sense of outcasts but never mention claudia… which is insane bc this line in the show alone says so much

But it was 1939, and the only N* allowed in first class was the porter, and the N* passenger rode the rear. The N* vampire made do with what was left, which was fine with her.

neither second-class passenger nor porter directly serving whites: claudia is the black vampire sitting in the stowaway with the dogs and people’s luggage, earlier hiding out in university corners pretending to be the cleaner’s child, engorging herself on blood and taking body parts from her victims to put in storage all if it means she could have something for herself. shes really the ult. outcast of sorts.

#yn. #yn answers #yn do sum maymays. #kaelio #iwtv #claudia #opinion rate #The word is censored bc i dont believe in using it recklessly in mixed company^_^ or at all tbh. #Not in the modern day. #and it also irks when ppl r like ‘claudia needs a woman’s touch’ #but forget how in the book estelle & the other theater chicks groped her n treated her like a doll #or how book!madeleine sees claudia as a proxy for her dead daughter #but bc book lew+ clauds r in this quasi incestuous set up shed take dead daughter over wtf lewis wanted out of her #like ‘women’s touch’ dont do her very much up until the ghost psychic mind link w/ jesse im afraid. lol #its a bizarre form [& actual example] of essentialism applied to claudia. #which makes me excited for s2 claudia bc like #like why is she dressed as a doll on stage!! in the theater #Oh baby esther we rly in it now. #I like romance i just dont like pop fandom’s idea of romance

[oceanwithouthermoon]

imagine saiki getting a premonition of himself in a GOOD future, happily married to someone he loves, living in a nice house, etc and somehow it scares him MORE than his normal premonitions do..

and he realizes that one of the biggest reasons it terrifies him is because now that hes been SHOWN the future, theres EVERY possible chance for him to fuck it up and never get the future he wants, and he'll ALWAYS be hyper aware that he has/could ruin his future.. usually, when he gets a premonition, its so he can prevent a bad future, but the future is so easily changed.. what if he messes it up ?? what if hes NEVER happy and its all because this dumb premonition made him too aware and cautious and start acting weird/different ??

what if knowing the potential future makes him act so different that the person he was married to in that future never falls in love with him ?? and he'll be stuck waiting for something to happen between them, just messing it up more and more ? hes going to waste so much time trying to make this potential happy future happen that hes not really going to live the life he was supposed to..

#im not saying all this WILL happen.. just that hes very afraid of it.. #the natural progression of relationships and life in general is already hard when youre a mind-reader.. this makes it so much harder.. #ngl i did think of this because of the mlp episode where twilight screws over her past self trying to tell her not to worry about the futur #this is different from that but i think kusuo has had/could have similar dilemmas #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #saiki kusuo #meows post

[silverskye13]

Every once in a while I like to relisten to Diabolical to remind myself that RnS's source material is the silliest thing on earth.

#spazzcat barks #apparently im feeling talkative today hello #how many weird statements can i put on my blog after so much only screaming in tags #anyway Diabolical continues to give me much #much joy and happiness #glee -- whimsey even #Helsknight straight up calls himself a knight diabolical -- you adorable edgelord you #also Welsknight's final line: #you embody all my evil and i am not afraid / ill defeat my inner demon for this is my crusade #[chefs kiss] #we stan a hero who is fighting for Right and Good who also just happens to be the antagonist of the story we're writing #and by we i mean me i stan i stan it very much #once could correctly argue thats the plot of half the stuff i write

[bluespiritshonour]

Okay so apparently Netflix removed Sokka's sexism in the Kyoshi Island episode...

...which also explains why he wasn't wearing Kyoshi face-paint in the stills.

Because if he was never sexist to begin with, then there's no need for him to change—he doesn't get to dress ‘like a girl’ and feel brave and courageous instead of ashamed. When Suki says ‘it’s a warriors uniform’ and Sokka stands proud and tall in the dress like—

Sokka was the only male character who's sexism was addressed by the narrative. Suki kicked his butt and he drank his respect women juice, like, guys! He learned!

And they just took the whole thing out. It means we wouldn't even get the “I am a warrior and I'm also a girl.”

That was what sold me on Suki’s character tbh. I'm mad. I'm so mad—but, okay, I should wait till the show drops. Then I'll start complaining in the earnest.

#im kind of tired of everyone starts out lily white shit studios been pulling lately #like seriously #now im kinda afraid for zuko #i hope they don't make him too much of a good guy—or cool!—from the very beginning #sokka #suki #kyoshi island #sokka learned a lot in that episode #why must they do it #okay #i should calm down #the show hasn't dropped yet #im hoping they didn't do it ig? #atla #avatar the last airbender

[gamerwoo]

really sucks when you realize you and a friend have just kind of grown up as two different people and don’t mesh together like you used to and like you have so much history you don’t wanna let go of but you’re absolutely miserable in the friendship

#to delete #the girl i’ve been friends with over half my life is just so insufferable now #she’s very pick me and likes to nitpick absolutely everything for no reason #absolutely DESPISES genz and tiktok for some reason #puts down everything about me and it feels targeted but she does it in ways that it comes across like it’s not #so when i call her out on picking on dumb things like kpop fans or genz i look like a psycho bitch #she very much just has to speak up on everything she dislikes instead of just letting people be happy #like it’s shit that’s not bothering anyone #she once went OFF because i’m afraid of bugs and ‘most girls’ are afraid of bugs but SHE isn’t afraid of them #and im like yes girl we pick you please stfu #it’s always just little stuff that doesn’t matter but 98% of the time has to do w something i like or don’t like #so it feels targeted and then i speak up and the rest of our friends are like ‘calm down it’s not that deep’ #idk i just like…..she feels the opposite about a lot of things i feel #and then has to act superior for being opposite of me #also being so angry over a generation of young adults/kids and an app for no reason…… #idk we just don’t go well together anymore and idk how to bring it up

[thekidsarentalright]

the way that 2our dust shirt has already been removed from their website, and apparently it never was actually for sale and was Just There… theyre so fucking scary and good at teasing stuff dear god x

#very much the same vibes btw as the newspaper and website stuff that started this era. subtly teasing something for those who notice. augh! #i woke up wayyy after it was put up so i assumed it being sold out already was real but. it literally was just there to tease us. god!!!!!! #so like when is it coming… im bracing for impact when is it gonna happen if they’re teasing it Now… im so afraid <3 #txt #p: 100

[lord-shitbox]

[moderate demo spoilers] sick and twisted how ais says he doesnt have any friends. what is vere to you. bitch. you enthusiastically nod to just anyone talking about stabbing? you catch him without word when hes tipsy just like you would any other rando? u fuck him silly as just an acquaintance? not even a homie? mother fucker?

#touchstarved game #ais #vere #ais/vere #shitbox meta #PULLING My HAIR OUT #relationship tag im picking otherwise am afraid itll b too short easily mistaken yada yada #ill replay the demo and squint so very carefully at everything once i finish my assignment oh fuck thatswhat i was doing before igot distra #that piece by laymes-art living in my fucking head forever btw. love it soooooo fucking much

[mueritos]

being in a social work masters program as a marginalized person who is ages ahead in theory and experience in comparison to your (white, privileged, rich) cohort is a fucking minefield. solidarity for all and every other marginalized person in these fucking micro aggressive and liberal ass social work programs.

#muerto talks #i mean like yea. of course this would happen #didnt matter if i went to nyu or school in philly #white women flock to social work programs because theyre not smart enough for nursing programs #sure youre not commiting elder abuse as an rn but youre a mandated reporter in communities youve never spoken to until now lol #its been quite isolating here and im not afraid to be myself and speak up in class but the fucking thank yous i get from white women #make me wanna bite a rock man #id much rather u call me a slur at this point #at the very least my field placement is in a bipoc space with bipoc staff #godspeed to all other marginalized people in these masters programs........

[dedenneblogs]

(heartbreak high) that one babysitting format meme

but my fun lil spin on it

#heartbreak high #fyp #netflix #netflix heartbreak high #ok ill explain #quinni is the best out of all of them #makes schedules and everything; takes job very serious #amerie is an older sibling she's been babysitting for free #malakai probably is like “this is the next generation-- we have to raise them right” #ant kind of just lets the kids play fortnite with him #missy is rlly popular with the kids she babysits. the parents not so much #cash is scared of the kids. is genuinely afraid they'll shatter like a vase if he drops them from too high #jojo is the definition of wine aunt #harper gives older brother core energy but sister if that makes sense #also is shown to radiate big sis energy #dusty probably tries to act cool but probably just comes off lame #darren doesnt like kids. plain and simple #woodsy gives off strict elderly babysitter energy IM SORRY #sasha is just rlly lame. probably makes kids go to bed rlly early so she can just goof off so comes off as mean #fuck chook #spider is self explanatory #cash's nan may seem jarring but im not sure she seems like the type to secretly be a bad influence