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#impact of neglect
fenkko · 1 year
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kissing the homies goodnight 😚 especially kaveh
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whispereons · 6 months
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Oracle!Reader Part 19
Masterlist - Part 1, Part 18, Part 20
Warning! This chapter has child abuse, neglect, racism/classism and other sensitive topics! This is a imposter sagau so expect these things frequently. Attention! This chapter is extra long as it deals with Y/N's past and present. But I don't want to force a backstory that you guys might not want. Therefore you can read and choose what part of the backstory you want to be 'canon' for your Y/N. Whether be all, parts or none of it. It's your choice.
Your earliest memory was of a hospital. A vase of dying daisies, a child-sized bedding and a window slightly cracked to let in the night breeze were the only things you remember from that day.
A nurse gently knocked before walking in without looking up from the papers in his hands. 
"How are you feeling today Y/N? I hope you aren't suffering from nightma-Oh! You're awake!"
The brief exclamation from the startled nurse pieced you in that you weren't supposed to be awake. Or maybe, you haven't been awake for a long time?
Dry cracked lips wheeze out your small plea. "W-Water…" Coming back to himself, the nurse adhered to your request and brought the cup to your lips.
It was a cool relief to your aching throat and the first thing you asked him was.
"Who's Y/N?"
That cup of water and clinically clean blanket was the comfort you had during the next flurry of events.
That day, laying in a bed on the pediatric floor of a hospital, you learned that your parents were dead.
An accident that would have presumably traumatized you had little to no effect on your psyche. When the doctor asked you what happened you didn't have an answer.
You didn't have an answer for most of their questions either. After a series of fruitless questions the doctor and psychiatrist called in, settled on the diagnosis 'Retrograde Amnesia'.
Being stuck in a medically induced coma, you had to relearn how to walk along with other basic info. The photo of your parents, friends and house went ignored on your bedside. Why should you care about people and places you didn't remember? It's not like you were going to go back.
Most of the hospital staff gossiped in poorly concealed whispers as your nurse, Malcohm, walked with you around the floor. It was all the same thing.
"That child's poor parents, to not even be remembered by the one thing left behind."
It didn't bother you much but Malcohm always shooed them away with a scowl. He was kind to you, from helping you remember your name, to remembering what your parents' names were. 
It's not like you didn't remember that you had a name or that you had parents. But all the memories you had of them were gone. All your past experiences were gone too. 
The doctors were relieved to see that your memory loss was only applied to everything before the accident and not after it too. A date to be discharged was decided and a stoic man came to greet you. 
There was no warmth or care in his voice as he introduced himself as Mr. Castio. Not a drop of sympathy as he explained that you would be attending your parent's funeral. That your relatives would be there too, to discuss who would be willing to take you in. All you could do was stare at the newly replaced daisies and nod silently. 
If there was one thing you had relearned during your time at the hospital, it was that adults were to be obeyed. With a sad goodbye to Malcolm, you trailed behind Mr. Castio into the shiny black car.
You sat in the first row dressed in traditional and simple black clothing. Multiple people came up to you apologizing for your 'loss'. With a soft nod, you thanked them and they left satisfied. Mr. Castio had already advised you to not bother explaining the situation.
All your relatives spoke fondly of your parents until it came time to name anything they liked about your parents. The whole room went silent before little hesitant whispers floated around the room.
Seems you weren't the only one that couldn't remember.
The silence only got more unbearable once the topic of who you would be going with came up. Older adults volunteering younger family members while they vehemently denied the position. 
It was only after one uncle asked what would happen to your parents inheritance that greedy stares bombarded you. Picking at the stray fabric of the cushion, you ignored them all.
Mr. Castio clarified that the money would be untouched until you turned eighteen. Immediately, everyone looked away. No one wanted to raise a seven year old to adulthood without any immediate compensation. 
The funeral ended with your parents being incinerated. No one took the urns. It made you wonder why none of your grandparents showed up.
By the end of the day it was your aunt who agreed to foster you. Mr. Castio brought you to your parents house to collect your belongings. 
The house was clean and in order but the slight dust showed that it hasn't had a visitor in a while. Entering your room, you noticed how plain it was. Not a single toy, drawing or other personal object in sight. 
It unnerved you enough that you packed quick enough to not stay any longer. Curiosity poked at you to find out what kind of parents you had but you were more concerned on what your aunt is like.
She had a son and a husband you haven't met during the months you lived there. Her son was rude but never gave you any personal trouble. It was more common for him to throw a tantrum over one thing or another then bother you.
It wasn't an ideal life, but you weren't miserable. You ate three meals, had a bed and had supplies for school. Everything is fine, life is fine.
That thought was repeated as you sat in school with paper being thrown at the back of your head. The teacher ignored the behavior and your aunt repeatedly told you to not cause trouble. Even as you ate a different meal then your cousin and slept in the cramped closet-like room.
It was fine.
Until it wasn't.
A broken picture frame laid on the ground between you and your cousin, the ball he was playing with rolled to the opposite side of the room. When your aunt walked in, he cried and blamed you for it, saying that he told you not to play indoors.
This wasn't your fault and you said as much, but no matter what you said she just shook her head. You laid in bed with an empty stomach as your cousin’s words echoed in your ears.
"You shouldn't have tried to snitch on me."
School got worse with your cousin instigating more bullying against you. The house got tense as your cousin put all his energy into making you miserable. Day after day your aunt looked more and more stressed.
You still couldn't understand why he kept picking on you. There were no plans of revenge or fights, you relatively stayed neutral and passive. Life wasn't fine but you would have stayed like that until you overheard a conversation.
"-yeah, I'm only getting that much money for fostering Y/N. Shitty, right?"
Inelligle sounds came from the telephone in your Aunt's hand as she stored her jewelry. 
"If only my son would stop taking it. He already fights so much with Y/N and I just punish Y/N because a parent should always take their child's side. That child should have just passed away with their parents if they wanted to cause trouble."
Silently, you left back to the closet with the makeshift bed. Staring at the ceiling, you slowly accepted the reality of your situation.
Her wishing you to be dead alongside your parents wasn't the issue. What mattered was that she didn't care about the truth. She knew it was your cousin who started every problem and punished you because you weren’t her kid. 
That night, sleep didn't reach you as you spiraled into plans of vengeance. 
There was no sadness or shock on your face when you eavesdropped on her phone call with Mr. Castio. You merely noted the date that Mr. Castio would pick you up from your Aunts. You always had a feeling she would give you up, it just took longer than expected.
She and your cousin left to go celebrate whatever made-up achievement he lied about. Leaving you, an eight year old, home alone to your devices. If you ignored the list of chores you had to clean for ‘provoking your cousin into hitting you’, of course.
The house was cleaned to perfection when your aunt returned. The door creaked as she peeked in to see you dusting off the bookshelf in the guest room. She left satisfied as you set a book back on the shelf, covering a broken lock.
That night she told you to pack everything as Mr. Castio would be coming the next day. You simply nodded and left the room as your cousin laughed. You smiled too when he began asking what would happen to the money as your Aunt shushed him furiously.
Breakfast was cold as usual the next day, the mocking jeers your cousin spouted rolled off you with no reaction. Rolling his eyes at your ‘tough act’, your cousin scoffed before opening his lips to spout whatever snarky remark he had. Until the door to your Aunt’s room slammed open. She stormed in and whispered-yelled to him while pulling his ear.
You didn't have to hear to know what was said. All you heard next was-
"I didn't take the money!"
She's too mad to shush him and yells back. "Then who did?!" 
He stutters as he glances around the room. His eyes lock onto your stoic face with a frustrated expression.
"It was Y/N, they took it, they took the money!" He points at you as faux tears bubble up, his pathetic little sniffles only earn an annoyed sigh from his mother.
"What money?" You ask, tilting your head. Wide eyed, you stare at them both innocently, confusion emitting from your being all the while.
Mouth agape, your cousin looks back to his mother as she pinches the spot between her eyebrows.  "You're grounded until I get back all the money I lost, or until you return it." 
He tries to argue more but the ring of the doorbell interrupts the argument. Mr. Castio is let in and he merely motions you to follow him. Your aunt leaves the room with more wrinkles than she came in with.
With no goodbye, you grab your bag and walk to the door. Pausing you glance back at your cousin, a wide smirk is clear on your face. His eyes widen as realization sets in but there's nothing more that can be done as you close the door. 
--------------------------------
The sun breaks dawn as a quill scratches against rough paper. The ink is used in elegant strokes as Violetgrass is grounded and packaged. Yellow-slitted eyes read it over once more before folding it and writing the recipient on the exterior. 
Pearly white scales glint with the ray of the sun as the snake is woken up gently. Sleepily, she loops around and climbs the outreach hand to hang around the owner's neck.
"It's merely daybreak, who could be needing medicine so dearly?"
"A fever could kill, you know that as well as I do, Changsheng." A smooth, melodic voice comes from the snake-eyed man as he stands from his desk and walks toward the cabinets. The letter is put into one cabinet and another is opened to obtain an opened vial of medication.
"Herbalist Gui stayed the night to take care of this particular patient so I'll give them the last of the medication so he can go home."
Glasses perched and viridian hair tied up, Baizhu walks into the back room and knocks softly. A tired looking Gui startles as a child sleeps on the bed. Her father is slumped on the bed as he sleeps soundly, his eye bags comparable to Gui's from his many nights spent worrying over his daughter.
"Go home Gui and have a proper rest. This should be the last medication she needs, her fever has lasted over the past few days but she's stable."
"Thank you Dr. Baizhu, I'll get going now. Let me just grab my belongings."
Gui stands from the small stool and ambles around the room quietly to not wake the patient. Baizhu stands at the bedside and pours the medication into an infuser.
A low fire begins to burn as the medication is properly prepared. Soon enough, Gui leaves the room as Baizhu brings the cup to the girl's lips for her to drink. It goes down smoothly and Baizhu turns to retrieve any supplements to aid her when-
"Dr. Baizhu, there's an emergency!"
Gui bangs the door open with a troubled look as the girl stirs and her father wakes up with a start. Baizhu smiles at the father as he takes long strides towards Gui.
Gui wouldn't react this strongly unless there's a real emergency. Baizhu has worked with him long enough to tell when something is out of Gui's expertise or life threatening. 
"I'll need to step out for a while to deal with this. Please keep watching Yiran, I can assure you that she's past any dangerous stages Mr. Kuan."
Kuan nods his head sleepily and stays in his seat as Baizhu walks out the room. The door closes and Baizhu follows Gui as he asks "What's the situation?"
Gui speaks as fast as he can while walking toward the pharmacy entrance. "Qiqi was missing most of the night, which isn't abnormal, but she's at the front desk crying inconsolable while carrying a person on her back. They're bleeding out heavily and I saw multiple cuts, bruises and arrows in their body."
"I'm sorry to ask this from you but please prepare the treatment room. Once you do so, I can take care of them as Qiqi runs the front. If anything, I'll close the front until the patient is stable."
Gui nods before turning back as Baizhu steps into the threshold of the front. His eyes scan the room and quickly spot Qiqi and the patient she's holding.
Qiqi stands frozen in place as she grips you on her back. Tears roll down her cheeks without stopping, a stark contrast to her blank expression. Baizhu walks closer and kneels down to her level as his eyes dart over your unconscious body.
"Qiqi, I need you to follow me while carrying them. Can you do that?"
"Dr. Bai… Dr. Bai, they need herbs. Dr. Bai, Dr. Bai…"
Qiqi stares past him as if she doesn't register his words. Baizhu recognized the name 'Dr. Bai' easily as her name for him when she was still learning to remember.
Changsheng lifts her head as she hisses in a cooing way. "Qiqi, you want to save them, correct? We have the herbs but you need to bring this patient to the treatment room."
Baizhu reaches toward the zombie child and carefully wipes away her tears. “There’s no need to worry Qiqi, just do as Changsheng says. Remember I love you most.” 
Qiqi nods but she doesn’t stop crying much to Baizhu’s surprise. Deciding to leave that for another time, he slowly walks to the treatment room passing by an exhausted Gui who sends a worried glance at you. 
“Don’t worry about it Gui, injured patients aren’t the most frequent but I have plenty of experience caring for them. Just go home and rest.” With a sigh, Gui leaves as Qiqi stands next to the clean bed. 
You’re quickly transferred to the bed and positioned to lay on your side for a proper inspection. “You should stay outside. Qiqi. I’ll let you see them when I’m done.” Not looking back, Baizhu changes his gloves before gingerly touching the bloody wounds. Bits and pieces of scrap can be felt inside the injuries under his fingers making him frown.
“There’s quite a range of injuries on them. Not counting the bruising and cuts, there are some deep stab wounds.” Changsheng comments from her perch as she stares down at the zombie.
“Their calves have been pierced too, it’s cold to the touch with elemental traces. Someone used a cryo vision on them. Their back isn’t straight and their breathing is harsh, I’m suspecting some broken bones. They must be identified soon so I can heal them.”
As he pulls his hands away, a small metal arrow tip falls out onto the floor. “That one has hydro elemental energy, different then the cryo one earlier. Two assailants means double the bleeding.”
“Baizhu! That can be dealt with afterwards, look at their head!” Changsheng’s sudden hiss pulls Baizhu’s attention to the area in question. The pillow your head is laying has begun to be stained red as a puddle forms. Blood dribbles out of your cracked lips as your breathing becomes strained.
Dendro glows at the tips of Baizhu’s fingertips as he carefully trails his fingers across the wounds. “Changsheng, they don’t have much time left. Their qi is perfectly balanced so I’ll only need to transfer some lifeforce. That head injury is the most pressing injury but I’ll spare some power to temporarily block the bleeding.”
The puncture wounds shine a soft green and the blood on your loose, shoddy bandages slow down. A pained gasp breaks free from your lips at the accident brush against your cracked spine.
Baizhu and Changsheng both peer down at your head, your matted hair knotting from the blood makes him grimace. “Their skull met with great impact but it’s not fatal.”
“Not yet, at least.”
“This mask needs to be removed for proper circulation and examination. More injuries may be hiding beneath it.” Baizhu speaks absentmindedly as he changes gloves and begins to reach toward the bloody mask on your face.
Your eyes snap open, making Baizhu freeze in surprise until you push him with enough force causing him to stumble. Changsheng hisses in retaliation as Baizhu steadies himself.
You stumble off the bed with a sway as blood rolls down your forehead. With glossy eyes and cracked lips you speak slowly. "Don't… touch it…"
Baizhu and Changsheng share a worried look at each other before focusing on you. Taking a step closer, Baizhu raises his empty hands in an act to calm you.
"Now, now, I'm just trying to help you. That mask is obstructing my care and can cause a serious problem."
"I… said… NO TOUCHING!" Your arm flails to the side, knocking over objects and causing a loud crash. 
An animalistic yell rises out of your hoarse throat while your limbs swing around in agitation. Baizhu keeps a safe distance away as he watches you.
"This enraged fool will be the cause of their own death!" Changsheng yells over the sounds of vials and glasses crashing.
Baizhu doesn't respond as he stares at you, your every movement is carefully noted under watchful yellow eyes. 
Your pupils blown wide, trembling body, and strange movements weren't lining up with a simple blood loss excuse.
A small hand tugs his pant leg as your rampage slows to an end. Baizhu looks down at the red rimmed pink eyes of the zombie child.
"What is it, Qiqi? Do you have something that can help them?"
Changsheng keeps a watchful eye on your exhausted body as your endless mumbles of refusal continue. Your bag in Qiqi's hands is handed over to Baizhu without a word.
"Is this theirs?" A single nod before she steps away to stare at you with a seemingly worried frown.
Baizhu opens the bag to find it completely empty. Not a single speck of dust or dirt can be seen in it unlike your dirty, ripped clothes. But before he closes it, he spots a tag on the inside of it.
'Property of Y/N L/N'
With that new information, he sets the bag down on a farther table and looks back to you. You stand trembling next to the bed as pieces of broken objects litter the ground. With slumped shoulders and eyes threatening to roll back, your voice cracks with every mumble.
"Don't take it off. Can't take it off.. Won't let you take it off…"
"Y/N? Is that your name?"
No reaction comes from you. He tries again. "Y/N, can you hear me? Can you understand me?"
Again nothing, not a twitch, not a flinch or even a slow in your mumbles. With a tired sigh Baizhu makes up his mind.
"Changsheng we have no other choice, I'll knock them out so be prepared to share my life force with them during the struggle."
"No."
Baizhu looks down at the snake in slight surprise, Changsheng speaks in a wary voice.
"For whatever reason, Teyvat is reaching out to me in warning. Don't take off the mask, keep it on and heal what you can."
Baizhu spares one more glance before sighing. "If that's really what you believe then we will do things your way. Perhaps Y/N's body is stuck in a fear response and may actually kill me."
Baizhu carefully steps past the shards and approaches you with a gentle smile. "Qiqi clean up the mess, lest our patient injure themselves on it. As for you Y/N, you can relax. I will not take off your mask, you are safe here."
Immediately your eyes roll back and you collapse to the ground. Baizhu was swift enough to catch you before any injury but your reaction was enough to cause him grief.
"Qiqi, as soon as you are done, manage the front for me. This will take a long while."
-----------------------
Change was something you grew used to during your childhood. You changed schools, caretakers, friends and homes long enough to know the process by heart.
Adapting was another thing you were good at. Shady houses with out of control classmates and unending fights meant that it was a dangerous place. That you had to stay low and be on edge constantly. Everything you owned had to fit in your locked bag or else you would find it missing the next morning.
It was a bit easier in the city where most were working class. Making friends would be too much trouble and fairly fruitless. You were content to stay invisible and deal with any problems outside of public view. Some students just didn't know how to describe you, some were too fearful of what they accidentally saw to say anything about you.
The most and least stressful was the rare times you ended up with a rich family. On one hand every student knew you as an orphan but at the same time, rich kids loved to feel like heroes. All you had to do was play the weak and kind student. Nearly every student flocked to be your guardian angel as you showered them with compliments.
You never lacked lies and stories to tell but you also never stayed in one spot for longer than a few months. Each time Mr. Castio got more and more fed up with you. From a stoic disappointment to a quiet rage filled with belittlement. 
It was at 12 years old that you got fostered by your third wealthy family. They already had children, a daughter your age and a son who was barely three. You already knew that you would be their designated babysitter.
After a month of living there, you began to truly enjoy it. There was no mistreatment, obvious favoritism, a nice allowance, and even your own room. Even though you held no love for them, you followed your foster parents requests with no trouble.
Cleaning, babysitting, organization, yard work, sewing and more spontaneous jobs. Not only did they give you a bonus for the work, they also let you buy stuff with it when you asked. 
You didn't need to be constantly catered to like their daughter, you were just happy to sleep without fear of getting robbed, an empty stomach or bruised skin.
After a while you began to realize just how much you depended on them. It worried you, you agonized endlessly about getting attached and abandoned. You worked harder at school, gave in to their request full of smiles and got along with their children swimmingly.
The longer you stayed and obeyed, the larger the possibility of them adopting you or at least fostering you till adulthood became. 
But, you really should have known better. You’ve gone through it so many times, yet it seemed you still didn’t learn your lesson on who you can trust. The only person who truly had your back was always going to be yourself.
A normal day, a nice lunch and a polite request to do the dishes, something you were happy to oblige in. The sponge absorbed the soap and water letting you wash the dishes with ease. The chore is second nature to you.
 Their daughter was out of the house, probably hanging out at a friend's house. Their son was with them in the dining room as their chatter reached your ears clearly.
“I’m so glad we got lucky to foster such a kind child.”
“As am I. They work hard, get along well with everyone, and help us around the house without complaint.”
Their praise was something you were still struggling to get used to. But it made you happy nonetheless. You couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that it was an exaggeration or a lie no matter how many times you chided yourself.
“That’s true, I never expected a kid with that upbringing could be so smart.”
“What child wouldn’t do well with us taking care of them? They struggled a bit at first but they seem to realize what a good deed we did with fostering one of their kind.”
The water running down your fingers felt colder, almost like ice was traveling through your veins. Was that really what they said? Did you hear them correctly? You held onto some semblance of hope that they weren’t speaking about you like that. But the longer you listened, the smaller your hopes shrunk as your doubts grew.
They spoke about you as if you were a pet. Due to what? Being an orphan? The class difference? Your race? Your gender? Or was it just you? All their past compliments and words that seemed innocent are thrust into a new light. One full of demeaning words hiding as kindness.
The dishes in your hands become like dynamite. Just one drop and it’ll set off a whole chain of events where you can tell them off. To scream insults and obscenities from feeling tricked. Yell at them exactly how you feel, how angry it made you to be spoken as if less than human. As if less than them. 
Instead, you set the clean dish onto the drying rack. A deep breath is taken and then two more. Impartial rationality is focused on as your wounded heart is shoved away.
You have a good home, you aren’t being abused. Taken advantage of? Yes, but you get paid for it. This isn’t a family, it’s a job. It’s the best foster family you’ve had by far. They were wealthy and if you played your cards right, you could graduate from this upper class school and get a good job. 
It’s a good deal. It’s the best deal someone like you will ever get. You should be grateful, you don’t need their affection, love or attention. You just need to survive long enough to support yourself. You shouldn’t ruin a good thing.
Those words play on repeat as the last dish is set on the drying rack. The sink is turned off before you grip the counter tightly. Water is drained down the sink as you tell yourself that you’re just angry. Your blurry vision is just from anger, you remind yourself over and over again.
--------------------
A strong stench of iron permeated the room as skilled hands continued to work on your body. Blood splatters stained Baizhu’s clothes, sweat on his temple as he carefully traced the wounds with Dendro glowing on the tips of his fingers. Life force was continuously given to you as Changsheng stabilized Baizhu’s weakening body.
With the most pressing injuries taken care of, Baizhu examined your bloodstained back. The broken and fractured bones there were the next in line to be treated. Grabbing a pair of scissors from the bedside, he raised them to the midline of your clothes.
“The blood is keeping the clothes stuck to their body. We don’t have time to pull the clothes off carefully.” The small mumbles left Baizhu as he concentrated on not accidentally nicking your skin. 
Once done, he set the scissors aside and pulled the remains of your clothes off. A clean wet cloth is gently used to clean the blood off as your skin becomes visible. Simultaneous gasps leave the contracted pair as the cloth is dropped.
“Those scars! Baizhu, this isn’t a mere coincidence anymore. This person is much too similar to The Creator. Those scars are exactly as described in the scriptures.” Changsheng’s frantic hissing doesn’t reach Baizhu as he stares sternly at the marks in question.
His lips part hesitantly as his eyes never leave your body. “We should leave it be….”
“And what reason may that be?” Baizhu reaches an ungloved hand to thumb the old and faded scars as chills run down his spine.
“While it may be true that they are suspiciously similar to the Creator, there is more to this situation. The most widespread theory on why their blood is gold is that their blood is supplied with pure elemental energy and oxygen unlike everyone else that simply wields elemental energy. Even inhuman beings don’t have elemental energy coursing through their veins.”
Baizhu focuses his attention back on your bones as Dendro is summoned by his vision again. Changsheng rests herself with a tense posture as she waits for Baizhu to continue.
“Y/N is bleeding red and naturally absorbs my Dendro seamlessly. Furthermore, the scars on them have a strange aura on them.” Changsheng gives a look to Baizhu silently conveying her theory.
He shakes his head in response and clarifies. “It’s not god remains, but it’s similar. If god remains are like a natural poison and plague on a body, then this aura is the cure. The best way to describe this is that they are god cores. I believe it’s connected to the reason their qi is perfectly balanced despite the situation.”
Changsheng settles down at Baizhu's words as she watches him continue to care for you. Your breathing hitches as your bones are healed and snapped back into place. A low wail is all that can leave your throat.
“So Y/N is something in the middle? Will you really care for them even if it means taking care of a potential imposter?”
A heavy silence follows the question as Baizhu’s natural smile softens. The medical supplies that were used during all these hours litter the room in a mess. His gold eyes stare down at your pale, trembling body. 
“Yes, I will. They are still a patient that was brought to me. If they truly are an imposter then the Millelith can deal with them after they’ve healed properly here.”
Baizhu cleans his hands and changes gloves once again as he examines the remaining wounds on your body. Smiling down at Changsheng, he speaks smoothly “Shall we begin the final stage of their treatment?” 
-----------------------
Middle school reaches its end and the summer before high school came. You had passed with a high grade from your many long nights spent awake. Long days spent babysitting their son while upkeeping the chores while their daughter played leisurely. 
You felt proud of yourself to pass with those grades while dealing with them. As the months went by, your foster parents felt less and less of the need to treat you the same as their children. At the end of the day, they still paid you so everything was fine.
Summer was reaching its end and you were creating a list of items you would need for the new school. Halfway through, a soft knock on your door broke your focus. Your foster parents stepped in and asked you to join them in the living room.
Swallowing down your nerves, you nodded and followed them. Were they planning on giving you up? So close to the new school year?
The moment you sat down, they dropped the metaphorical bomb. "We want you to stay back this year and go to high school next year instead."
That wasn't so bad right? You just need to wait another year to start high school. It's not like you could be thrown out at 18 with no high school diploma, left to fend for yourself after giving up a year of school for them.
It's safe to say that you reacted badly to the news. Every 'Why?' was given a half hearted answer that changed constantly, and when you put your foot down and said no, something about them shifted, as if a curtain had been lifted or a coin had been flipped.
The once kind and gentle gleam in their eyes dulled into something akin to annoyance. As if you were doused with cold water, the atmosphere became tense and you just knew that you messed up. You, who had been so careful to stay on good terms and always abide by their request, was looked upon with coldness. 
“A child like you should not be giving us this disrespectful attitude.”
“We’ve clothed you, fed you, provided everything in that room. And it’s now with this single request that you’re rejecting us this harshly?”
The lecture goes on and on. Told how grateful, how sorry, how happy you should be. Cruelty laced every word has their arrogant figures towered over you. There was no chance for you to speak up, the helplessness you felt only pushed you down further.
At the end you were sent to your room with the date of your ‘fostering’ decided. The suitcase you took out and began to neatly fill felt foreign. You truly believed that you would be staying here until your 18th birthday. With the room bare and your eyes puffy, you tried to sleep.
Thoughts of what you should have done came to you in waves. You should have just accepted it. Even if only as a facade and found some way to prevent them from alerting the school in time. You wouldn’t have lost anything, if only you weren’t so stupid.
Tears spring up and it’s wiped away harshly as more replace it. Bitten lips begin to bleed as you hold back any embarrassing sobs that crawl up your throat. It’s only as footsteps are heard outside your room that you freeze.
Eyes wide you listen to the conversation as the sadness turns to bitterness. The bitterness wraps around your heart and squeezes as you learn the truth behind the matter. Their precious daughter had failed her grade and they just couldn’t let their child be upstaged. 
Teeth grinding, you sit up from your bed and begin to dig through the stash of objects you’ve found throughout your time in this household. A plan forms in your mind that all depends on what opportunity is given to you.
Your ex-foster parents announced a dinner to be held at a fancy restaurant and dropped the responsibility of watching over their son on you. Their daughter cheers happily at the sound of her favorite restaurant being chosen as you go to your room. Curled up in the bed, you try to ignore the stabbing pain in your heart.
The door slowly opens as the house goes quiet, their son toddlers to your bed with wide worried eyes. Chubby fingers pat your cheek softly “Are you okay? You sad?” The broken sentences are cute as he stares at you sadly.
Sitting up, you pet his head and smile at him. Your eyes are a strange swirl of emotions as you reassure him of your well being. The next sentence is a familiar one, just with different intentions than all the times you’ve asked before.
“Do you wanna play a game of hide and seek?” The smile on his face is so bright that you almost feel bad for your actions. 
Mr. Castio picks you up the next day, your ex-foster family waves goodbye to you as you enter the car. Their son cries and begs his parents to stop you as they soothe him calmly. Their daughter is the first to leave as you close the car door.
“How could you fuck up such a good deal?” The harsh words are spoken easily now that privacy is ensured. Wrinkles are as clear as his scowl as he drives away and out of the neighborhood. 
“I got you to be fostered in a family like this, and you couldn’t just go along with what they asked? I never had much expectations for you, but did the amnesia take away your brain too? Actually, you were probably born this way.”
Curling your knees into your chest, you try to ignore his demeaning words. Round two of being treated like a worthless child began as you endured the long car ride. The more he spoke, the more you shook.
“-really. Making my life harder than it has to be. All because you couldn’t shut your damn trap. Is your useless pride worth more then-”
“Why don’t you shut the fuck up instead?!” That was all it took for the loud argument between you both to begin. You had already tried to play nice with one set of arrogant adults, why should you deal with another?
A pained smirk crawled onto your face as you cursed Mr. Castio out who didn’t hesitate to dish it back. Whether it was being nice and submissive or being rude and blunt, both had the same outcomes.
You sincerely hoped that your ex-foster family would enjoy the gifts you left for them to find. 
The drugs you had placed in the nightstand for the strict and uptight breadwinner to find. The photographs of the breadwinners affair you printed and left for the house spouse to find in the cupboard. And finally the positive pregnancy test you set in the liquor cabinet that they never failed to open at dinner time.
By all means, their ‘perfect’ family should fall apart, it was just a shame you couldn’t see the fall out yourself… It didn’t stop the unease and slight guilt you felt for their son who had truly done nothing to you. It’s not like your actions would have too much of an effect on him right? You, you weren’t wrong.
Right?
At the lack of insults, Mr. Castio stopped his verbal abuse. Deep in thought, you stared out the window as the scenery passed by. Where you would go next was not known but it was all right. You would find a way to survive, you always did. 
You had to.
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Calloused hands smoothened the blanket on your semi-healed body as Baizhu ignored the exhaustion setting in. The sun was high in the sky as the afternoon lull began to set in. Qiqi opened the door slowly as she peeked in, her eyes trained on your bandaged form.
“Dr. Baizhu, is it done?” Her hesitant voice was answered with a smooth smile and a calm voice. “It is, but Y/N needs their rest. You’ve been tense since you brought them in at dawn, that’s not good for you. Go to the courtyard and practice your arithmetics.”
Qiqi gives a small nod before walking away. With a sigh, Baizhu cleans up the remaining mess from the long treatment. “You’re exhausted, Baizhu. Stop acting tough and get some rest.”
Changsheng’s snotty but caring tone is clear to Baizhu as he walks out of the treatment room. “I’ll instruct Qiqi to gather some more herbs once she’s done. Before I can rest, I’ll need to check up on the counter. Gui should have arrived an hour ago.”
Opening the door, Baizhu is greeted with the sight of Gui giving a farewell to the last customer. At the sight of the doctor, Gui perks up in interest. “How is that patient? Did they make it?”
“Thankfully they did, but they’ll need to stay here a few days for the more severe injuries. I believe their name is Y/N, so address them by that name until we can ask them ourselves..”
Gui nods in response as Baizhu looks through what herbs they still had to use. Different prescriptions come to mind as he filters what information he knows of Y/N. What could trigger an allergic reaction, what medicine could have been consumed beforehand? What prescription is affordable without having too many side effects?
Those thoughts consumed his mind as Qiqi returned and he mindlessly instructed her on what herbs to gather according to the prescription of his choosing. Gui leaves deeper into the pharmacy as Baizhu finishes and stores the medical file safely.
Did you have any means to pay the treatment or follow up prescriptions? Any family to contact for visiting and support? You wouldn’t be the first patient to have no one to rely on but Baizhu still couldn’t shake off the feeling of something more going on with you. 
It was quite perplexing that he, who took great care to focus on being the best physician and on his own contract, was so drawn in by you. With a tired sigh, Baizhu pushed up his glasses as Changsheng raised her head to look behind him.
A knock on the doorframe only urged him to turn around and look at the unexpected visitor. With weary and suspicious eyes Baizhu stared straight ahead, “Is there something I can help you with?”
Lips curled into an ambiguous smile and with a polished voice, the visitor replies.  “I hope so, do you happen to have a patient wearing a mask?”
This chapter was fun to write, what writer doesn't like giving a trunk ton of trauma on their protagonist? I get 18 years to configure to my liking, what did anyone expect? But as always you don't need to consider this your Y/N's backstory. In truth I won't have you think back to these memories much as you have moved on from that past. You have for a long time. This is just the 'canonical' explanation as quite a few of you seemed to like my version of Y/N. Which makes me very happy! My editor approved of this idea, and edited it quickly enough for me to pump it out. I deal with the heavy work and don't need to do the annoying work! Also feel free to ask if anything was confusing. One last thing, after I got rid of the spam/porn bots I saw that I reached 1k followers! That's pretty amazing but I'm not sure if a special should be done or not. And if so, what should I do?
Taglist: Check Masterlist for more details but everyone is welcome to join it!
@vvyeislazzy, @nikqi, @the-dumber-scaramouche, @etherisy, @yourlocalstranger123, @ra404, @iruiji, @goldenglow149, @haru-tofuu, @lsleepysimpl, @bebobeboben, @yuyuzi-ling, @amidst-the-tempest, @resident-cryptid, @mxd1zzy, @mochicurls21, @nervouseaglelover, @thedevioussmirk, @yumuramma, @kwqsla, @undecidingfate, @ehjane, @game-savvy, @akiramirae, @liansh3ng, @fluffy-koalala, @formacoon, @sxftiebee, @khxii-i, @ursinaw, @chuuya-brainrot, @sweetbills, @kazuchaos, @snowfoxnix, @bluebelony, @shellofthewell, @pencil-of-ashes, @ghostlyintervention, @taiformaifoe, @goaudduck, @carminerin, @maddysflowers, @zenith-of-all-zenith, @crazydreamcat, @leafanonsforest, @grimreapersscythe, @leylanx, @sapphireknown, @help-whatdoimakemyusername, @zhonglisfruityass, @mer0n37, @victoria1676, @mochinessss, @sinnful-darling, @emilymikado, @pix-stuff, @esthelily, @luxie963, @emmbny, @millienolife @kbar1013, @xxblackroses623xx, @chxrlxtteee, @aludicpoet, @yandematic, @atrcclovsxoxo, @0lshadyl0, @esthelily, @t-rex-red, @ck123, @steadybreadbluebird, @118gremlin, @stratonia, @time-shardz, @farelady-fate, @valeriele3, @francisnyx, @byakuren100, @waveto-earth, @flyingpansaurus
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blood-orange-juice · 7 months
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Can't write anything about 4.1 because I'm in a State after all that.
But you can't argue that one of the best parts was Arle's reaction to Childe being arrested.
"Has he not an ounce of shame?"
He indeed has none whatsoever, dear Arle. Also I love this woman.
Laughed at Traveler going back to prison because it's free lodging.
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Fontaine must be a very expensive city.
Also I love how Childe succesfully avoided all the captivity tropes, made a fanclub out of people who tried to bully him, said something needlessly cryptic and left in the direction of the nearest eldritch phenomenon.
Accidentaly created a bunch of urban legends in the process too.
That's our boy.
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tanukified · 5 months
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Winter date… 🩷
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swymsuyt · 2 years
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strawberry flavoured zhongluc
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littlehatmouse · 1 month
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save me butch arlecchino save me....
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paimonial-rage · 6 months
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from your character analysis ask meme, for alhaitham: Are they prone to jealousy? would he be too logical to be jealous? Would his jealousy be in vain or would it perhaps be a sign that his partner has crossed the line of sorts?
Definition of jealousy:
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I apologize for taking some time with this ask. I’m going to answer this in a more analytical format because I think this situation calls for it. I want to say that no, under normal circumstances, Alhaitham is not the kind of person to get jealous. In my experience, there are usually three triggers for jealousy:
1. Reader interacting normally with friends and hobbies and partner gets (unreasonably) jealous
2. Reader getting too involved with spending time with friends/hobbies not realizing they’re neglecting partner which gets them (reasonably) jealous
3. Reader specifically does things that will incite jealousy within partner by purposefully doing things like ignoring partner or flirting with others
Alhaitham would not get jealous under the first instance. Being a very independent person, he would understand and respect his partner’s need for it as well. The second instance would be the closest he’d feel to your definition of jealousy. While he’d be able to withstand it for a while, eventually he’d probably feel neglected and would pull you away to capture your sole attention.
As for the third scenario, while he would get upset and would get jealous, I don’t believe this would happen in a normal relationship. Personally, I would never flirt with someone that isn’t my partner just for fun, even if I’m close to them. I think that’s a very hurtful thing to do to someone that has feelings for you.
So long story short, no, I don’t think Alhaitham is prone to jealousy. Not that he’s “too logical” to be jealous. He just understands and respects people’s need for independence. That being said, he probably can end up feeling neglected if left alone too long.
#genshin impact#genshin x reader#alhaitham#alhaitham x reader#anon#character analysis ask meme#now as i always do i’m going to answer the part you’re looking for in the tags#the reason why alhaitham wouldnt be a jealous person is that hes both reasonable and he doesnt play games#when you enter into a relationship with alhaitham he will make time for you and seek you out#he's self-regulating in that way that he'll make sure to get his fill of you regularly#even if you are busy he'll find some way to slot yourself in your schedule#and like... the thing with him is that he really doesnt need much#itd take you turning him down consistently for other things for him to get jealous and feel neglected#this is when he gets immature because if you try to spend time with him after you can expect some passive aggressive sass#'hmm... you seemed to be having a lot more fun with them instead'#you'd have to make it up to him#add onto that someone flirting with you? he'd swoop in there to stake his claim#that being said i highly doubt this would happen often?#you'd have to be REALLY DENSE to neglect him up to this point#when he is feeling neglected expect him to be more physically touchy#he'd just want you near#haha#sorry this isnt much#i'm the wrong person to go to for jealousy asks#i'm not a person that finds jealousy attractive#unreasonable jealousy i find restrictive and childish#reasonable jealousy i find as a sign i am not doing my job as a significant other#my job as someone's partner is to make them feel loved and needed no matter what#so if theyre not feeling that that means i'm doing something wrong and i need to fix it
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weirdnesslieshere · 7 months
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So, I watched play through of Meropide and basically, everyone either flat-out didn't care what happened to Childe in prison or was like, "eh, he'll be fine".
And then the quest ends with a thirty-second cutscene of Childe in a void with a whale.
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badolmen · 1 year
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Everybody’s always talking about the biblical imagery in Goncharov but I haven’t seen anybody talk about the allusions to Greek mythology like !!! Goncharov looking at Katya through the mirror when she threatens to shoot him, not making direct eye contact - Perseus and Medusa’ poisonous vision. When Sofia is leading Katya in the tunnels, not looking as they talk, but she turns around and Katya is gone - Orpheus turns and Eurydice vanishes. That unnamed taxi driver is paid two coins by Goncharov right before That Scene - he’s literally Charon, transporting the ‘dead’. Guys the whole boat scene is an allusion to the River Styx. The theme of time and the human hubris to defy it and the seemingly divine punishment of that ambition. Tell me I’m not the only one seeing this.
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angstcorp · 2 years
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HOW THEY HURT YOU
Summary: No one is perfect, and sometimes they hurt you, even without meaning to.
Author's note: I TRICKED YOU WITH FLUFF FIRST NOW IT'S TIME FOR P A I N.
Characters: Ayaka, Ayato, Diluc, Kaeya, Zhongli
Warnings: Gender neutral reader, Angst, there's no comfort here (maybe in another post), mention of neglect in Ayato's, mention of a verbal fight in Kaeya's. There's no physical violence, and there's no will to hurt the other here, just people being people.
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AYAKA is not the same when she is with you behind closed doors and when she is out in the public. Her clan and her family are so important to her, and she can't afford to mess up, which makes a lot of things feel... fake. And unfortunately, as her s/o, that means that she'll expect you to have the same high standards.
And it's so, so heavy. Not being able to be too spontaneous or taking a carefree decision, being out and not being yourself but rather representing something, all of that is hard to deal with when you were not born in it. Dancing in the rain is too childish, laughing too loudly is not proper, too much PDA is not allowed. You might try to negotiate that her own older brother doesn't seem to care about appearance as much, but she'll simply answer that she is the face of the Kamisato clan, not him.
AYATO tends to take you for granted. Once you've been together for some time, he simply expects you to forgive him for being late, for being busy, for not telling you everything, for keeping you in the dark. You love him, and you know he loves you and would never do anything to endanger you or hurt you, right?
Yet, he does. His absence hurts, the cold side of his bed hurts, his empty apologies hurt, all the gifts he sends through his retainers but never himself hurt, all the times you feel like the last person who knows whatever is going on, all of this hurt terribly. And he probably won't notice until you're at your breaking point and he might have already lost you already. He won't know what to do then, having ignored all the signs that led to this.
DILUC is... not good with words and emotions. He doesn't really know how to handle them, neither his own or others'. So when you're upset or angry or sad, he is at loss. Sure, he can hold you and bring you whatever you need, but words? Yeah, not his strong suit. He is either silent, or will try to solve whatever problem you have when you just need to vent, which makes you feel like an idiot or like whatever happened was your fault.
And it gets frustrating, both at himself for not finding the right word, and at you because you just don't seem to get what he means. When he sees he is doing more damage than good, he might just give you space... and should the same thing arises in the future, he might just avoid you to not make it any worse. Which is not the best thing to do.
KAEYA is insanely good with words it's almost scary. With you, he is nothing but flirt and sweet words and compliments and light teasing. But when you two are having a fight? His tongue goes faster than his brain, and his words cut deep. Depending on how angry he is, he might either immediately calm down and take back his words, or just steel his heart and refuses to feel any sense of guilt whatsoever. Maybe grow a thicker skin if the truth hurts that bad?
Once he cools down though, he will fall in a hole of self-loathing and guilt (hole he might try to fill with alcohol, too ashamed to confront you). He will eventually crawl back to you, but he knows how to use words too well to fool himself he can fix completely whatever his horrible words just damaged.
ZHONGLI is old. He might be one of the oldest beings in all of Teyvat, and it's so obvious in anything he does. There's nothing you can do to not feel the difference between the two of you, no matter how well he treats you. From how much he knows about everything, to how quickly he seems to take on all the newest trends, from how much stronger he is than you, to how well he seems to handle any situation.
Being with him sometimes feels like playing your first puzzle game together, except he has already done it once, and also hundreds of other puzzle games. He might let you think for yourself and try to figure out the solution, but he already has it. You feel like a child, with a parent watching over, waiting patiently until you get that the red cube goes in the square hole.
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arwaiel · 1 year
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freindsssssss · 5 months
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I will never understand people who are upset about Childe being an absolute punching bag of a man during the Fontaine archon quest. It's hilarious. Funniest shit I've ever seen. Skirk throwing him through a portal horizontally with one hand is literally the funniest scene in all of genshin. Made even better by the fact that she disses him afterward.
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pwurrz · 10 months
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damn. kaveh and alhaitham really are adhd vs autism huh
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ven7s · 1 year
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love stored in decorations
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— scaramouche x gn!reader ; wc. .5k; genre fluff, hurt-comfortish?, modern!au, non-canon information + headcanons
notes. implication/mention of neglectful parents (ei & yae) and lonely childhood. business women yae and ei because i think thats very sexy of them !!! also also idk i kinda hate this but like the CONCEPT of it, just dont like the way i executed it
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"hmm... move it to the left a bit more."
scaramouche lets out a huff but does as you say, moving the fake icicles to where you want it before you shout, "wait, sorry, just a little to the right."
he scowls to himself before looking back at you with a grumpy frown that elicits an apologetic smile out of you. but nevertheless, he moves the icicles once again, much to his annoyance.
he climbs down the ladder and you hurry to hold it, wrapping your arm around his waist once he's finally on the ground, and he does the same back.
you marvel at your house, but not long after you hear scaramouche grumbling, complaining about how cold it is and how he doesn't get why you two have to do this every year.
"because it's nice to see our house decorated. doesn't it make you feel cozy and more… holidayish? besides the kids around the neighborhood like it!"
he scoffs, but you know he acknowledges your words when he starts to grab the string lights out of the box of decorations. you smile and go to hold the ladder again as scaramouche climbs up to further adorn the house.
he gets your reasoning.
he looks back at his childhood, often recalling the memories of him walking back home from school only to see the houses that lined his street filled to the brim with decorations ranging from lights on bushes to huge inflatables and candy canes hanging from rooves.
his favorite was always yoimiya’s, whose parents always went all out, every year.
then he remembers his house. big, but empty, with no air of that fond and nostalgic feeling that holidays so often filled people with.
he knows that his moms are back in japan, attending to their work, ei and yae being far too busy with their businesses to worry about decorating the house for a holiday that only lasts for a month.
he remembers holidays often just being him and his nanny with a letter sent to him from his moms. a few short sentences of "happy holidays! sorry we couldn't make it this year again.. next year for sure! we miss you!"
so, when you first “forced” him to decorate your shared home with you he obliged, albeit a bit annoyed. now, he still feels annoyed, hating the coldness of winter, but he reminds himself that the end result will be worth it, hoping that other kids would feel the joy and warmth he felt as a kid, like he felt when he looked at yoimiya’s.
(and of course, he would never admit it, but he actually finds himself having fun. reliving his childhood dream of decorating the house during the season that filled him with so much dread as a kid with a loved one.)
its all the reason why he’s outside in the frosty weather that indicates the start of december in his rudolph pajamas (matching with your santa pajamas), hanging up ornaments and lights.
once he comes down again, you smile, “it looks great. thanks for the help,” kissing scaramouche on the cheek before leaning your head on his shoulder.
“yeah,” he hums, “it looks nice.”
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a/n: HAPPY HOLIDAYS !!!! hope everyone stays safe !!
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fated-normal-767 · 5 days
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See everything points to Kronos having been neglected by his parents but I almost think it would be sadder if he actually had a very loving home life . Maybe his parents died shortly before or after he met Oulixes and that’s why he was so easily manipulated by him . That was his rock and after a while it seemly started feeling natural to rely on him . Kinda like how I feel Asphodel had a pretty normal and good life till she met Zephyrus
i think the only lasting issue his family gave him was Catholicism. But I agree, probably otherwise pretty nice and chill. I know they definitely died when Kronos around or just under 19, so probably just after he met oulixes. Yeagh. 😁👍 you read him like a book.
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Can we please have another Sabzeruz Festival? This time with no Akademiya conspiracies?
It's literally Nahida's birthday, let her celebrate it with a great event, invite the archons and let Nilou do her dance!!
Except this time, there are a few new additions to the celebrations, like a giant cake with 500 candles, a chance for the eremites to shine (Jeht appears and dances with Nilou!), not to mention a Genius Invocation TCG tournament.
And if anybody tries to ruin the fun, we throw Wanderer at them, murder time! Candace also makes an appearance.
There is also an Azar piñata.
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