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snezario · 2 months

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Technical Difficulties; Vo//x

A/N: The Ha/zb/in Hot/el hyperfixation continues... For the longest time, I struggled with how snz with a television screen for a head would even work but @stormyweaver solved that instantly ty friend (I don't even talk abt it in this fic lol)... Anyways I'm throwing this out into the world and hibernating for the next year!! Here's some very self-indulgent tv demon Suffering

You’ll have to try harder than that next time, old pal.

Alastor’s last words to him play again in his mind. The pompous freak. Which brings Vox to his current situation, standing in front of the stained glass doors of the Hazbin Hotel. He straightens his bowtie and raps on the door three times. Charlie opens the door just as his hand lifts from the third knock. Her shock at seeing one of the Vees at her doorstep is quite apparent. Vox smiles widely and extends his hand.

“Your majesty, I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced. I’m Vox, head of VoxTe-”

“YOU! You gotta lotta fucking nerve coming here!” Before Vox can finish, Angel Dust appears by Charlie’s side stabbing an accusatory finger towards him. Ah yes, Val’s favorite little whore. Almost immediately after, Vaggie is also standing before him, scowling. Vox maintains his sharp grin despite the intrusion and scoots away from Angel’s finger.

“I sincerely apologize for our previous interaction, Princess. Val, Velvette, and I have given it some thought and we were hoping to develop a mutually beneficial relationship. You see, the whole reason we even sent Pentious is because of your current sponsor-”

“Alastor?” Charlie interrupts, tilting her head.

Just the mention of his name is enough to send a volatile surge of electricity through his circuitry. Vox quickly unfurls the fist he unconsciously made and smiles.

“Yes, we seem to have got off on the wrong foot so to speak. Alastor (Vox says his name with such venom that Charlie shrinks back slightly), and I haven’t always quite seen eye-to-eye, but that’s no reason for the two of us to have any quarrel. In fact, we have a few ideas that we’d like to run by you and modernize what you’ve got here.”

Little Miss Bleeding Heart’s eyes light up, her positivity and compassion almost makes him fucking vomit, were he capable of such human vulnerabilities.

“Ohmygod, we would LOVE to have more Overlords on board with the Hazbin Hotel. Come in, come in! Let me show you around,” She beckons him in while Vaggie continues to glare at him suspiciously as he steps over the threshold, pointing her spear at him.

“One wrong move and I’m shoving this spear through your chest,” she threatens.

This is actually the first time he’s stepped foot in the building. It’s not nearly as hi-tech as his VoxTek building, probably that radio fucker’s influence. Husk flips him off from the bar in the back. A small black cat weaves between his legs, purring before settling in on a nearby couch.

Before he can comment on anything, an unmistakable shadow glides along the floor before his rival manifests in front of him. Vox’s blood pressure spikes as he stands face to face with Alastor. The radio demon is wearing his almost patented grin (the smiling freak), seemingly unperturbed by the Vox’s presence at the hotel.

“Ah, if it isn’t my so-called ‘rival.’ Trying your hand at redemption?” Alastor smirks, twirling his staff nonchalantly. Vox’s hypnotic eye swirls with momentary fury. He takes a deep breath and instead of rising to the barb, Vox flashes his own demonic fangs.

Charlie begins the tour in the foyer, showing him every minute detail. Of course, he’s not really listening at all. His attention is momentarily diverted when he feels an unusual tingling in the back of his screen. It passes just as quickly as it appeared. Not giving Vox much time to contemplate it, Charlie drags him off to another room in the hotel.

As they walk around, Princess Morning Star continues chattering excitedly about having sappy conversations in the parlor. Despite Alastor’s insistence that he has better things to do than babysit his media rival, Vox can feel him following close behind them. Not only that, but it’s becoming more clear to him that something is wrong. The fuzzy feeling is starting to become more than just a minor inconvenience. He tries to ignore the rising wave of panic in his chest. He just updated his software not too long ago.

“Soooo what did you think?” Charlie’s looking at him with puppy-dog eyes. He looks around and realizes that they’re back in the lobby. Apparently they made an entire loop of the hotel and now Charlie is expectantly awaiting a response. He opens his mouth to speak but it’s at this moment that the fuzzy feeling becomes outright unbearable. And, unfortunately for him no amount of ignoring it seems to do the trick. The buzzing sensation crests and the veneer of self-control crumbles. His screen glitches out as his body snaps forward as he is overcome by the feeling.

hh’ZZZSHH’uhh!

The hotel lights dim during Vox’s expulsion, causing the residents to glance around in confusion. As the lights flicker back on, Vox realizes that the hotel has fallen completely silent. He finds that he’s also teleported 5 feet from where he was previously standing. Everyone is staring at him, their facial expressions a mix of annoyance, bewilderment, and amusement (from Alastor, the bastard). Angel is the first to speak.

“What the fuck just happened?”

Vox mentally repeats the same question to himself. What the fuck did just happen? Did he just… sneeze? He didn’t even think it was possible, at least not in his new form.

“Seems like our little video friend is experiencing some *technical* difficulties.” Alastor chimes in, the pleasure he seems to have derived from Vox’s predicament is quite apparent. Smug piece of shit. What he wouldn’t give to punch him in his perfect teeth.

His resolve wavers as he senses another prickle at the back of his head. Sparks generate along his frame as Vox tries to fight another surge of the unwanted feeling… to no avail. Vox’s screen dims as he involuntarily sucks in a sharp breath.

hh’zZZSHh! ihh..ihh’ZZSSHhoo!

The outburst causes another surge of electricity in the hotel, as well as leading a couple of the overhead light bulbs to explode. By the time he straightens up Niffty has already sprung into action, sweeping up the shards of glass that now litter the hotel floor.

“WHATTHEFUCK,” he spits out, unable to maintain his composure despite the fact that he had an audience.

“Hmm, persistent,” Alastor muses, thoughtful tapping his slender fingers on the top of his staff. While everyone else is still processing the most recent events, Alastor surveys the damage to the hotel. As scans the lobby, his gaze falls on KeeKee. Realization dawns on him. Ohoho, this could be quite entertaining, best he keep this bit of information to himself for now.

“I– ihh… I have to go,” Vox manages to say through clenched teeth. The less he said the better his chances were if he were going to keep the feeling at bay. He prepares to teleport out, but not before the sneeze he was so desperately trying to hold back, slips out.

ih’ITZZSSHhh! Godfuckingdamnit. To save himself what little dignity Vox has left, not that there’s much remaining at this point, he departs in a flash of light.

“Talk lat-” Charlie trails off as she realizes that Vox has already electorported out of the hotel.

“Well that was quite interesting,” Alastor spins his staff around before magick-ing it out of existence. He seems to have something on the tip of his tongue, but ultimately decides to keep the thought to himself, humming nonchalantly as he walks away.

Sitting on his couch, Vox groans and flops back. Well not only did that fail miserably, Vox embarrassed himself in front of the entire Hazbin Hotel family. He sinks deeper into the couch cushions as the entire fiasco plays in his head. His rumination is interrupted by a straggling tickle.

huh’zZZCCHh!

Dragging a hand down his screen, he sniffles (really?! this just got better and better) and sighs. This was quite an unpleasant experience, one he would not like to deal with again anytime soon. Somehow he felt this was Alastor’s doing, no he knew the radio demon fuck definitely had something to do with it.

#fiendwriting #i have never had a hyperfixation this intense before #i am completely and utterly consumed

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auxiliarydetective · 4 months

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In My ＿ Era

When I saw this prompt for Day Three of the OC New Year's Challenge, I did a little reflecting. Emphasis on "little" because it came to me very quickly:

I am definitely in my...

ONE PIECE Era!

Really, I've created three new One Piece OCs within the last four months alone. It's really fitting, because Luna - the very same Luna I talked about in yesterday's entry - was my first ever proper OC - and also my first One Piece Era/hyperfixation, and I revamped her only recently, Inari joined her sometime during my earlier Tumblr days, upon my second One Piece Era/hyperfixation, and with the arrival of the live action, I was firmly hyperfixated once more and in my One Piece Era, and I haven't left it ever since. So, I present to you all five of my current One Piece OCs, listed from left to right by the time of their creation.

Aether S. Luna, the "guardian angel" of the Straw Hats. Her crystalline shields and large wings have saved the little band of misfits countless times. Having travelled the seas since she can remember, she eventually ends up won by the Foxy Pirates, becoming part of the stakes during their fight against the Straw Hats. Of course, the Straw Hats (mainly Sanji), try their hardest to get her on their crew.

Charlotte Inari, the Straw Hats' lookout and errand girl. The complicated workings of her devil fruits like to toss her around a little, but she's fiercely loyal to her friends. Oh, and she also just so happens to be the daughter of one of the four Emperors of the Sea. Oh well... Surely, that won't cause any trouble.

Akaito Coraline, also known simply as Cora, the Straw Hats' tailor. The only living descendant of a world-famous family of tailors and a childhood friend of Sanji, Cora always carries three things: Her sewing needle, pierced through her ear. A dream to revive her family's legacy, making sure people remember the truth instead of the myths. And a burden on her mind, one that only Sanji seems to know, and neither of them like to share. Also, a crush on both Sanji and Zoro, but she would never admit that, would she?

Felicity, nicknamed Lily, is half human, half fennec fox mink, and honors a great deal of her vulpine ancestry. From being fairly nocturnal to becoming hyperactive (it's the zoomies, according to Usopp), from frequent naps and sleepy phases to a happily wagging, fluffy tail... Though then again, some of her mood swings might also be blamed on her devil fruit, its powers turning her emotions into... something. You never know.

My newest plot bunny, for now simply known as the "Black Widow", who was inspired by my history professor's tangent on the similarities between Ancient Roman patronage and the mafia. She's a spider with an invisible net of connections, her "friends", which include pirates from the old era, warlords, even emperors if you'll believe some sources. The Black Widow generously "adopts" younger, inexperienced or generally weaker pirates, dubbing them her "children" and offering them her protection - in return for some services, of course. Because friendship is a give and take. Some people claim she's incapable of love, some people claim that she's all talk and no game - but fact is that nobody has succeeded in killing her just yet, and her influence on the powers of the world is undeniable. No matter what you need - money, protection, men, weapons, or even a devil fruit - she can get it for you, for the small, small price of your undying loyalty. Those who have broken this vow all found themselves swimming with the fishes one way or another.

▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄✼▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄

Taglist: @starcrossedjedis @oneirataxia-girl @daughter-of-melpomene @supermarine-silvally - let me know if you’d like to be added or removed!

#behold! my babies!#one piece #one piece live action #one piece oc #opla oc #oc: aether s luna #oc: charlotte inari #oc: akaito coraline #oc: felicity #onyc23 #fyeahonepieceocs #photopea adventures

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pinkautist · 1 year

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i have another VERY original question!! top 5 video games :3

YIPPEE another question! i actually don't know if i actually even HAVE five favorite games, but i'll try this!

Bloodborne

Persona 3/4/5

Fire Emblem Awakening/Fates

Pokémon (can't pick a favorite game so i'm going with the franchise)

WorldNeverland - Elnea Kingdom

bloodborne gets to be at the top of this list, even though it's largely unorganized, MAINLY BECAUSE it pretty much saved my life back in 2018 or something. i got extremely good at the game, despite how difficult it was, and it apparently happened so fast that my boyfriend that the time became jealous ^^" it's a great game that accurately portrays eldritch horror with a really neat lore that i really could go on for hours about.

i listed the persona games as one because i got into one because of the other and i played all of them around the same time, so. as i've told my mom, in terms of aesthetic, persona 5 is my favorite, and in terms of characterization, persona 4 is my favorite, but persona 3 holds a special place in my heart because it was the first one i'd ever played. the persona series is really neat because it introduced me to a lot of eastern psychology theories, such as the idea of the shadow self and whatnot. it also introduced me to the concept of the subconscious manipulating how people view and interact with the world, and just. a lot of neat psychology things. it's another series that i could just go on and on about LOL

the first fire emblem game i ever played was awakening. i was playing it while my mom and sister were, and i vividly remember talking to and recruiting gaius, and then talking to my mom and sister about it and them just exchanging a look and being like, "YOU CAN RECRUIT HIM????" turns out, they had BOTH killed him during the battle LOL another memorable one was fates. i had played the conquest route first, and BOY, did that one MAKE ME CRY. to this day, my mom is STILL afraid to play that route, simply because my reaction was so raw.

and, well, of COURSE pokémon makes this list. your girl is autistic. that was my first ever hyperfixation. i had memorized type strengths and weaknesses before the age of ten, which i think has really influenced how i play games now. also, notice how many of these are turn-based games? yeah. i think pokémon had to do with that, too.

and worldneverland gets to be on this list! it's a mobile game that's been ported to switch, and while i am playing the mobile version, i WILL be buying the switch version when it goes in sale. i just bought a new switch because my old one was dying, so my bank account is kind of hurting 🥲 worldneverland is, like, the ULTIMATE life sim. you move into a kingdom as a traveler, and if you like it, you can become a citizen. from there you marry and have children while working to earn work points so you can make money. once you're done with your current character, you can pass down to one of your children while retaining all items from your previous life and pick a different career. it's really fun!

#ask #yamjooon #my uncertainty in the beginning does not even begin to prepare you for the length of my response #i assure you that i ended up thinking about this for a good 20 minutes LOL #really fucked me up (in a funny way) being like 'huh. what games DO i like??'

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cxttlefishcxller · 6 months

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Dahlia Jeyne -- The Voice of Hope County

I mentioned somewhere that coming into a game years after the hype train died down is like being one of the trash puppets in Labyrinth. I'm just puttering around the junkyard finding cool shit and putting it on my back. And as Far Cry 5 is my current hyperfixation, that means that I'm building fics and reblogging posts and essentially making myself a nuisance, so why not like. Actually post about the stuff I'm writing. Accountability and all that!

Anyways, this is Dahlia Jeyne, my latest BlorbOC that I've shoehorned into this game for no better reason than to get these brainworms out of my head. Fic facts and character stuff under the cut!

Name: Annabeth Dahlia Jeyne

Age: 32

Hair: Brown

Eyes: Brown

Dahlia is a journalist searching for the story that finally puts her name on the map. What she had originally started as a piece on the correlation of herd mentality and religious influence led her to mentions of a doomsday cult deep in the Montana mountains, and right to the doors of Eden's Gate. She spins a story about wanting to write about life on the inside of their commune to combat rumors and accusations from the locals that the group is nothing more than moon-eyed followers of a gibbering madman, and receives an invitation to stay in the compound and receive a firsthand education as to what the Project is doing from none other than their leader: Joseph Seed.

The people of the Project stand at the opposite end of her moral compass, but she's moved by their sheer belief in a better, fairer world. The rest of the county is painting them as traitors, devils, or even victims of the Seeds' manipulation, but Dahlia finds them to be kind, sincere, and unfaltering in their faith in the man and the family that they think will lead them from the jaws of destruction. Unwittingly she's swept into Joseph's machinations, falling deeper into his plans with every step she makes to figure out just what his game is...and if he truly thinks of himself as Noah saving his people from the oncoming flood.

I actually have 5 pages of this fic started which is on brand for me because I'd set out to write about my Deputy OC and John instead. Funny how the yearning rats have smaller attention spans than I do dudhsbbsbd

Anyways I will. Attempt to post things here to mark my progress, I guess? I figure it couldn't hurt any, and I ought to have some way to keep all of my thoughts together anyways. 😂

#cringe culture is dead and I am free #and to no one's surprise yes this is another oc/canon piece of bullshit falling out of my mindthoughts but also like.#did anyone expect any less of me #anyways dahlia's actually an old Hannibal OC I'd made maybe 10 or 12 years ago and she's gone through a LOT of changes over the years #she's now going to be a pain in Joseph's ass until she realizes that he's actually not wrong about his eldritch visions of nuclear fallout #from a silent and uncaring god that isn't quite the one Joseph thinks it is #moodboard by me #far cry 5 #when the levee breaks #far cry oc #joseph seed/oc #secondary fun fact: Dahlia's old faceclaim is Emmy Rossum

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sixtynineinchnails · 2 years

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I’ve seen a lot of disc horse happening on here about hyperfixations on Harry Potter and whether or not people should be forced to stop liking the series altogether. and once again people are taking the argument to the extremes and whipping each other into a rage.

I have ADHD. I have hyperfixations. Sometimes those fixations are on problematic or outright bigoted/awful media. I cannot control what my brain latches onto besides not being exposed to it in the first place, and some media (Harry Potter especially) is hard to avoid. I can’t just stop fixating. and yes, for a long time I did fixate on Harry Potter. it has taken a lot of time for that fixation to fade, and I’ve had to come to terms with a lot about the thing I once cared about so dearly.

that being said: you can have a hyperfixation without supporting the original text or creator.

want to watch the films/read the books? get them from a local library, buy them secondhand, or pirate them.

want to buy merch? buy from small businesses (not trademarked stuff) or buy secondhand.

want to wear Harry Potter merch? wear it around the house.

want to create fan content (fanart, fanfic, amvs, edits, etc)? do it. create it. maybe send it to a friend. do not post it.

want to talk about it? talk to a friend, family member, mutual, therapist, etc. don’t make posts about it.

I think sometimes we forget what it’s like to live in a world where we aren’t constantly sharing our interests with others online. but considering how many people have been hurt by jkr and her content, I think it’s fair in this case to say: fixate, let your brain cope with life however it has to, and if Harry Potter is what’s keep you going right now that’s alright. just don’t post about it. participating in online fandom is keeping her relevant, thus supporting her. she has made this clear herself. she’s aware of how fandom influences her platform.

and if you’re currently fixated on Harry Potter please remember to view it with a critical eye. I understand how hard it can be to see the flaws in something you’re so attached to. but in this case it’s not just the author. the media itself does contain a lot of problematic stuff (racism, slavery apologism, anti-semitism, fatphobia, appropriation of indigenous cultures, as well as a wealth of other things. if you’re wondering about any of this, feel free to comment or dm me any time and I can expand on these to the best of my knowledge).

that being said: if you’re currently on the side of the argument begging people to stop engaging with all Harry Potter media altogether: I get it too. I’m trans. I deeply despise what jkr has said and done, her wealth and influence, the movement she stands for, and the swath of wreckage she’s using her power to cause. I also agree that the text itself is deeply problematic and at best should be viewed with a highly critical eye and at worst should be taken out back and burned. if everyone could just stop engaging with Harry Potter media and fandom, that would be sure be nice.

unfortunately I don’t think that’s possible this time. Harry Potter still has a massive following around the globe who will never see the reasons to disconnect from it. telling neurodivergent kids online to simply stop hyperfixating is pointless and doing more harm than good. forcing people to feel incredibly guilty for their fixations isn’t exactly fair.

we all agree jkr is harmful and needs to have her platform removed. we all agree that the only power we have is by keeping the media relevant, or letting it go. it seems the level to which we need to disengage is the part where contentions arise, and extreme, black and white viewpoints and the terminally online nature of our lives and interests is warping our perspective.

if you truly don’t want to support jkr, you cannot keep posting Harry Potter content talking about how much you like it, regardless of whether or not you give her money or tag it “fuck jkr”. she’s already a billionaire. this is beyond giving her clout. this is about decreasing the relevance and platform of the author and her content, while creating a safer community for people who’ve been hurt by jkr and her content.

and if you truly want to get people to join your boycott, you have to understand that not everyone will be able to disengage the same way as you and the fact that they’re trying does count for something. the only way this will do anything at all is through unity.

TLDR: if you’re currently hyperfixated on Harry Potter that doesn’t make you a bad person, just please engage with the media in private and remember to view it critically. if you’re currently getting upset at people for their fixations, please consider helping to educate rather than lose your cool at internet strangers.

—

jkr apologists, terfs, Harry Potter defenders, etc: before you tell me to touch some grass and get over it, consider why you’re sitting there reading posts about things that you don’t agree with. you can just ignore this post and just keep scrolling. or better yet how about we both log off for a bit and go have a cup of tea instead

#oh jeez this became such a long post that was not the intention #and yes I am aware that I am also terminally online. I’m literally posting about internet discourse at 3:30am. this post is @ myself too #anyways. please be kinder to each other #fuck jkr #harry potter #hyperfixation #jk rowling #long post

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mandoalorian · 3 years

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Return of the Jedi [Max Lord x gn!Reader]

Summary: You and Alistair are heartbroken when you find out opening week tickets for Return of the Jedi have sold out. So Maxwell calls an old friend and organises a special surprise for his little family.

Warnings: food mention

Word count: 2000>

Author’s note: I received a request to write a Maxwell Lord x neurodivergent!Reader from @smoldjarin . They provided me with so much information in regards to autism, stimming, hyperfixations and more. I had so much joy writing this and I hope you find joy in reading it too. I couldn’t have done this without Melissa. I just hope I done it justice. (PS— I wanted to include Melissa’s love for Star Wars in this. I think we all, as Pedro stans, love Star Wars).

Maxwell wanted to pull his hair out. He had no idea what you and Alistair were yapping on about, but, evidently, it was something you both felt very passionate about. He’d seen you enthusiastic like this before, sure, but this was the first time he’d ever seen Alistair so hyped up. His brown eyes were gleaming as he hopped up and down.

“He literally said ‘I am your father!’ you laughed and Alistair let out a long groan.

“Yeah but he’s the bad guy! And the bad guys always lie,” Alistair explained — and that statement alone was enough to make Maxwell frown. ‘The bad guys always lie’ ... Ironic, to say the least. But, Alistair did make an excellent point. “I don’t trust him.”

You giggled and pulled Alistair into your lap. You’d never found it easy, touching people and being so close to them, but Alistair has grown to be an exception. He was like a son to you.

“Well, I suppose all will be revealed next week.” you told the ebony haired boy, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

You and Alistair got along really well, and Maxwell couldn’t be more grateful, but it was the moments when you both babbled on about Star Wars that had him feeling the most clueless. Granted, he hadn’t found the chance to sit through the movies, but he wanted to because he knew how much it meant to you and his son.

He was also made blissfully aware that the third and final instalment of the trilogy was being released next week, because you and Ali couldn’t stop talking about it. Even in the moments when Alistair wasn’t there, you expressed your excitement to Maxwell. He found it endearing though. He loved it when you talked about your interests and current hyper-fixations. Which is why his heart broke when you read the Friday morning paper and found out all the tickets for opening week were sold out.

Max, despite having no interest in Star Wars, was devastated when he saw the look on your face. He especially didn’t want to be the person who had to break the bad news to Alistair.

“I was really looking forward to it.” You mumbled sadly, your eyes fixated on your cereal. You only had a little left to eat, but truthfully, you’d lost all appetite. These movies and this franchise meant the absolute world to you, and now no doubt you’d have the final movie spoiled for you at work or by the television.

“Oh darling,” Maxwell hummed, wrapping his strong arms around you and holding you tight. You relished in his warmth and found yourself getting lost in the comforting scent of his sweet musk cologne. “I know. And I’m sorry,” the silence between you both broke his heart. “Don’t worry honey, I’ll fix this.”

You weren’t sure how he could possibly fix this. There were simply no more seats available in the movie theatres. He couldn’t just spawn in more seats. What Maxwell Lord did have though, was power, influence and money— and when he put his mind to something, he was sure to get it done. You had never met anyone more determined than him.

He didn’t want to leave you that morning, but duty called and he had to go to work. You tried your hardest to push through the day, ignoring this morning’s revelation. You opted to meet up with a friend at the park, and got ice cream. But when you’re friend told you they’d got tickets, you couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy. You deserved these tickets. It just wasn’t fair.

Maxwell was struggling to focus on his work too. He was running out of bright ideas, but he didn’t just want his statement from this morning to be another empty promise. He actually wanted to fix this. He’d do anything to make you and Alistair happy.

Then it struck him. If his life was a kids cartoon, an illuminated lightbulb would’ve popped above his head. He buzzed his assistant, Raquel, into his office.

“Mr. Lord?” she smiled, walking towards his pine wood desk. Maxwell combed his fingers through his golden locks of hair and looked up at the blonde girl.

“Do I know anyone who is in the uh— the new Star Wars movie?” He inquired.

Raquel was expecting some question about the latest oil numbers, or a request for more supplements — so to say she was taking aback by her boss’ query was an understatement.

She thought for a moment. “Well, Harrison Ford has been a long time investor for Black Gold. He attended last year’s charity gala. Do you remember?”

Of course Maxwell remembered. How could one forget about being in the presence of Hollywood A-Lister Harrison Ford? “Harrison’s in Star Wars?” Maxwell quizzed, trying to hide his piqued curiosity. “Bring me his number. I have to make a call.”

———

Maxwell was so excited to get home and share the good news with you and Alistair. You greeted him just as you normally did, with a loving embrace and a gentle kiss.

“How was your day sweetheart?” your boyfriend asked, smoothing out your hair.

You shrugged. “Fine I s’pose,” you told him. “How was work?”

Maxwell’s grin only grew. “Bring Alistair in.” he beamed.

You called for the boy who had been playing with his action figures in his bedroom. His mom had dropped him off about an hour before Maxwell got home. You and Ali snuggled into each other on the crushed velveteen sofa as Maxwell paced backwards and forwards. It wasn’t nervous pacing though, he was bubbling with anticipation.

“I hope you’re all excited for tomorrow night,” Maxwell began, before flashing three pristine Return of the Jedi tickets before yours and Alistair’s eyes. “Because I met with my good friend Han Solo for lunch and he has given us access to a private screening on Sunday night. So we get to see the movie before the rest of the world.”

You felt like you were in a dream. He’d done it. He’d actually fixed it. You didn’t know how and you knew better than to question him, but it didn’t matter because he somehow managed to fix this and it was all to you and Alistair. You’d found it so hard to find someone who loved you for you, who didn’t mind your stims and who encouraged your hyperfixations. But Maxwell was that man and you couldn’t believe how lucky you had gotten.

Alistair bounced up and jumped on his dad, almost knocking him over in the process. Maxwell wrapped his arms around the six year old and picked him up.

“Daddy! Thank you thank you thank you!” he squealed, unable to contain his ecstatic grin. “I had no idea you were friends with Han Solo!”

Maxwell smiled. “Oh yeah, me and Han go way back. I used to co pilot with him on the—“ Maxwell paused for a second as he tried to recall what Harrison told him. He had to get this right. “—Millennium Falcon?”

Both yours and Alistair’s jaw dropped. Gods, he was good at this. Maxwell may have been a brilliant businessman but he was an even better father.

“Does that mean you know Luke and Leia too?” Alistair asked.

“Oh yes.” Maxwell nodded, despite having no idea who Luke and Leia were.

“And Chewbacca?”

Chewbacca? Maxwell thought. What kind of name was that? Never the less he smiled and nodded. “Absolutely.”

“And Artoo and Threepio?”

Maxwell blinked. “Yep.” he replied through gritted teeth.

“Wow daddy,” Alistair hummed, snuggling into his dad’s chest. “I’m so excited.”

Maxwell dropped Alistair the ground and kneeled to his level. “You should put on your jammies and have an early night. That way, tomorrow will come around quicker.”

“Okay!” Alistair agreed enthusiastically before running back into his bedroom.

“And remember Ali!” Maxwell called. He cleared his throat and pointed his finger. “I am your father.”

That was it. That was the last straw. You’d tried your hardest to hold back your laughter as Max humoured his son, but seeing your boyfriend do a Darth Vader impression was something else.

Max sighed and sat down next to you, pulling your body into his lap. “I love you so much, my dear.”

You grinned and pressed a kiss to his lips. “I love you too. I can’t believe you did all of this.” you revealed.

“I always keep my promises.” he replied with the most genuine smile.

———

The movie was a success, and even Maxwell enjoyed it, which was very unexpected.

“I can’t believe Darth Vader was telling the truth,” Alistair sighed, exasperated. It had been a long day for sure, and his cheeks were still rosy with excitement. “I’m so glad Darth Vader isn’t my dad.”

Maxwell tutted.

“But he turned good in the end,” You smiled, taking Ali’s hand. “He saw what truly mattered. He had to save his son.”

Yeah, the parallels between Vader and Luke and Maxwell and Alistair were interesting to say the least.

“Daddy, who was your favourite character?” Alistair asked.

Maxwell thought for a moment. “I liked that guy in the green armour, he was cool. He sorta reminds me of, well, me.”

“Boba Fett?” Alistair quirked an eyebrow. “Oh daddy, no one is as cool as Boba Fett.”

Maxwell feigned a gasp. “Not even your old

man?”

Alistair giggled and rolled his eyes. “I liked the Ewok!” he announced and then tugged on your hand. “Who did you like?”

“I like Leia,” you beamed. “She’s strong and beautiful...”

“Just like you.” Maxwell whispered, brushing his

lips against yours.

The night came to an end and you couldn’t have been happier. As you lay in bed, you thanked Maxwell for all he had done. He was truly the best boyfriend in the world. He loved you so much, and he swore in that moment, as you fell asleep in his arms, that the next promise he’d make would be a promise to himself.

He was going to marry you.

———

Permanent taglist: @paintballkid711 @supernaturalgirl @phoenixhalliwell l @ah-callie @stardust-galaxies @wickedfrsgrl l @goth-topic @nerdypinupcrystal l @kiwi-the-first @pedroepascal l @castiel-barnes @honeymandos @rocketqueen @dybalalover10 @girl-obsessed-with-things @elena-myth @moth-guillotine @pedro-pascal-love @hayley-the-comet @pinkninja200 @maxiarapamaya @autumnleaves1991-blog @artsymaddie @harrys-stan @kennedywxlsh @cripplingmoon @cheekygeek05 @mrschiltoncat @rye-flower @theamuz @persie33 @sleepylunarwolf @martellthemandalor @pedro-pastel @steeevienicks @rrtxcmt @saphic-susperia @ladyjenny19 @readsalot73 @softmedics @jade10077 @dodgerandevans @planetariumx @pascals-cat

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #maxwell lord #max lord #maxwell lord x reader #max lord x reader #ww84 #jose pedro balmaceda pascal #star wars #the mandalorian #din djarin

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alexaloraetheris · 5 years

Text

Eve of Knowledge

So, I know I promised you guys a comic, but I’m slow af so here’s a bit of fanfiction about Eve. I tried my hand at writing from Eve’s perspective, and since I can’t read minds I have no idea how accurate this is, so take anything that’s not dialogue with a grain of salt.

There’s also quantum physics, and since I’m a biologist, take that with a handful of salt.

Her name was Eve.

Or at least, a variation of her Name that she’d been going by for so long, she wasn’t even certain what her True Name even was.

She’d given up on fake names a while back. There was no point.

The form she wore was plain, purposely so. Humans had this annoying habit of noticing beauty and being drawn to it. A vestigial instinct from when the gods roamed the world in their true skin. Their survival and prosperity was much more assured if they paid their lieges proper respect, after all. But then they decided not even the gods met their standards of Divinity, invented their own God, this time with a capital G, wrote their own stories, and forgot them.

Which suited Eve just fine. After centuries upon centuries of adoration, worship and even fear, anonymity was a welcome friend.

Unfortunately, anonymity was also the sort of friend that fled the party with an awkward excuse whenever another person was included in the conversation.

The person in question was the human girl currently sitting opposite from her at the tiny cafe table, sipping an abomination of liqueurs Eve wasn’t sure the staff were legally allowed to provide them with, and animatedly talking about forbidden Knowledge like she did it every day.

Unfortunately, she probably did. Scholars, in Eve’s experience, were usually like that, at least the ones that were true to the Science. Always pragmatically aware of their ignorance yet cheerfully ignoring human limitations in actually assuaging it. Those limitations were in place for a reason. Not even the gods themselves could bear The Sight and the Knowledge it offered for long, and humans didn’t even have the capacity to actually comprehend it.

That didn’t stop some of them from trying, though. Namely, Alexa.

“So, really,” continued the human in question, twirling a pencil around her fingers, “We can probably consider sentience itself an emergent property of this D-brane into our 3-brane! But imagine of it goes both ways! It would be… Hmm, imergent? Probably not. Anyway, if it went along the same yet opposing string, without changing any other property, divinity could be a direct outcome of sentience and the influence it exerts, and it goes all the way around in a circle through six dimensions! Well, it probably wouldn’t be a circle at that point, but I’m not sure what the extended property of a sphere would look like in the sixth dimension. Oh!”

She leaned precariously backwards on her chair and fumbled for the napkins from the opposite table, the ones on theirs already covered with simplified scribbles meant to represent their universe and its alternate counterparts intercepting at key extant points. It was pretty much a big circle with descendingly smaller circles stacked on top of it, interconnected with squiggly lines, surrounded by several variations of the same equation.

She’d given her an icy glare when Eve pointed out it mostly looked like an ice cream cone with too many scoops and cat hair.

Napkins stolen, to the chagrin of the couple sitting at the table, she started drawing matrix brackets. “Lets see~, if I take this 3D array and resize it to-”

“Alexa,” Eve interrupted her before she could start, “I’m not sure the cafe has enough napkins for you to elevate a sphere by three dimensions, not if you are keeping to realistic values. Maybe you should do that when you get home? On a computer?”

“Oh…”, Alexa had the grace to look embarrassed for all of three seconds before she gave her an impish smile. Then she just folded her napkins and stuffed them into a pocket of her backpack.

The couple next to them shot Eve a grateful look. Eve ignored them.

“Sorry, I got kinda carried away.” Alexa smiled at her, mind finally back in the reality the rest of her body resided in. “I just discussed all this with Haley the other day and thought you might be interested.”

Eve almost fidgeted in her seat. She wasn’t wrong, not entirely. Her theory was full of flaws, and she kept getting sidetracked by small details instead of focusing on the bigger picture, not to mention the knowledge she did have was riddled with dogmas that were so laughably incorrect Eve had to bite her cheek to stop from laughing in Alexa’s face, but the things she and her friend regularly discussed over coffee were… not wrong.

What humans were just starting to discover Eve had known her entire existence. Unfortunately, or probably fortunately, she had no way to voice that knowledge in a language humans could learn to speak. The gods had been alternately pitying and laughing at humans for being so biologically constrained that they couldn’t even realize, not only the depths of their ignorance, but also that they were ignorant at all. They had no way to interact with The Sight in a way that mattered. And the few humans throughout history that were born with the awareness of The Sight didn’t tend to fare well.

And then humans got done being pitied, and invented their own language for the Knowledge. They were the bumbling first sounds of babies, but they foretold the development of actual Words and actual Names.

The gods were still laughing at humans, but that laughter was getting more nervous with every year.

Eve was one of the few gods remaining who actually liked humans, if not actively interacting with them. The others mostly tolerated them, and only enjoyed them when they were bowing and scraping before them. Which didn’t bode well for them now that there were humans who were, in certain ways, actually more powerful than them, even if only in influence over other humans. And it certainly didn’t help that humans today tended to lock up anyone claiming to be a god into a mental institution.

At least they weren’t burning them anymore.

It also made Eve wonder if Alexa knew she wasn’t exactly human. Eve had taken great precautions to rid herself of any attributes that could give her away, but she had no way to fight relaxing forever. She slipped sometimes, casually mentioned things humans did not exactly find normal, or spoke of things humans didn’t even Know of.

And Alexa noticed. She had this annoying habit of forgetting important things and not paying attention when she really should, and yet noticing tiny inconsequential things absolutely nobody else even thought to notice.

Which would actually be great, if those things weren’t inconsequential to Eve.

‘Bloody humans’, Eve thought as sipped her own perfectly legal beer. ‘No matter how different, always annoying.’

Alexa was a staunch atheist, and she made it clear she though religion in general was just another excuse for prejudice when you ran out of physical traits to be prejudiced about. Her mistress was Science, and while Eve wanted to point out how hypocritical she was in dismissing faith in a higher being when she so dearly held her faith in laws of Physics and Chemistry, it also created a potential problem for Eve.

Because if Alexa was suddenly asking her about The Sight and Underworld in a way she probably thought was subtle, it meant she had already observed something, done her research, formed a hypothesis and reached the testing stage.

It meant Eve was already four stages behind.

Mind you, that conversation had happened around last Christmas. Alexa had gifted her two whole tubs of Drunk Tiramisu, made with generous amounts of alcohol Alexa either brewed herself or extracted from medical alcohol. Just the vapors were enough to get an average human drunk and it was amongst top ten of Eve’s favorite things in Existence, and Alexa had even brought a spoon.

Really, she really should have known it was a trap.

But she hadn’t, and she spilled far more than she would like. Enough that Alexa had picked up the tidbits, glued them together in a way she thought they should fit and filled in the blanks. And Eve had no way of knowing just how much of that was accurate or damaging, maybe even damning.

Getting into Alexa’s head was a horribly inconsistent exercise, so much that Eve eventually just gave up. But it seemed the human had either gotten what she was fishing for or had simply lost interest and moved onto something else, because other than the occasional question in passing she mostly dropped the subject.

Either way, Eve didn’t know whether to be relieved or disappointed.

‘Relieved,’ Eve decided, watching Alexa poke at a calculator she didn’t even need in a cafe and recalling that absolutely frightening weekend of hyperfixation when Alexa thought reading Flatland right after watching Gravity Falls was a good idea, ‘It’s definitely relief.’

“Not that his discussion wasn’t interesting but what does it have to do with your test?”

“Huh?” Alexa lifted her head in confusion, the pencil bobbing in her mouth, “Wha?”

“Your test tomorrow,” Eve lifted the Invertebrae textbook Alexa had given her, “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure the Schrodinger equation isn’t going to be on it.”

Alexa was already pale almost to the point of being translucent in places, so the sight of her blood rushing from her face left a rather ghastly picture. Eve had to laugh at the panicked squeak that escaped her as she suddenly dove for her notes, almost tipping her chair in the process.

Well, whatever the human thought or suspected about her she didn’t treat her any different, so. Maybe Eve could live and learn to let it go.

After all, it was just Alexa. She wasn’t going to tell anyone even if she suspected anything.

I’m fucked aren’t I?

Even better, this was written as procrastination for the aforementioned test.

#god goes to college #eve #alexa #quantum physics #gods #deity friend

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twobrokenwyngs · 4 years

Text

thank you ;;

holy ffffff

I ... I cannot ... CANNOT believe how kind and loving and generous people have been with me today. I am so overwhelmed with the outpouring of support on this, the anniversary of my birth. it is so, SO much more than I anticipated getting and I genuinely have no idea how I deserved it but I could not possibly be more grateful for it.

there are times when I can feel really invisible, y’know? suppose it happens to all of us now and again but there are definitely times when I’m like... man, it’s so easy to blend in, it’s so hard to make connections. there are so many amazing people out there and I just want to know them, be known by them. the last year hasn’t been the easiest - those closest to me can definitely attest to that - and my last couple birthdays have been laden with the baggage of disappointment and loss and longing and I really didn’t know what to expect this time around.

but... wow. the love and support I received today, both online and in real life, has been... remarkable, and I just want to take a moment to appreciate that. for myself. there’s sort of a rundown of the day I had below the cut but aside from that, I just want to say...

thank you. thank you to every single person that has messaged me or reached out publicly or privately, who has CREATED for me, (oh god, fuck, I cant believe you), who has taken a moment out of their day to think of me and wish me well. I am so endlessly grateful for you and I really hope you know how much it meant.

my birthday started with my best friend in the whole entire world, the absolute light of my life, @marsza, writing such a beautiful post which affected me more than I can really express. it was such a testament to the role Nia plays in my life that she was the first one to send me good wishes, even when she has so much going on demanding her focus. her regard for me gives me strength, it always has. if I go on too much about this I might cry but suffice to say she is one of the most profound influences in my life and to be reminded of her love on this day was just... everything. it’s such an incredible blessing to know that she’s going to be taking time out of her busy life to be with me this weekend and I suspect that despite everything - my enjoyable workday, my birthday party tonight - that’s going to be, by far, the best part of it all, because I am never happier than when I am with her.

before I went to sleep, too, I got the most touching message from Mia, @hexlikesramennoodles, that made me feel so loved and thought of and sent me to bed with so much warmth and so much to look forward to - including a package all the way from Australia filled with Australian things!! I cannot WAIT!

when I woke up today, I had such an avalanche of goodness from Annika, @clockheartedcrocodile who absolutely FED the feralness of my current hyperfixation by making me three moodboards and writing me a drabble, not to mention the public AND private messages of effusive love I got... oof, it was a lot. I don’t know how they fit so much love in their lil baby body. but damn... I lucked out.

she’d really hate for me to say it but @bakedapplesauce was so incredibly sweet to me today - she has this way of seeing you and knowing exactly what to say, what to do, how to make a person feel important. and then she went and wrote me a whole-ass fanfiction, about my two favorite redneck idiots, which I haven’t even been able to read yet but even knowing it’s there... god. I knew it was coming and it’s been something to hold on to and look forward to this entire week. for her to spare some of her VERY limited time and VERY limitless talent on me is such an honor I can barely process it. I! am! so! lucky!

@tommyplum, that ANGEL, freakin went into my back catalog and read one of my most beloved creations and wrote the most stunning review of it filled with incredible insights and poetry of her own and my god it was just so unexpected! it was such a unique sort of gift and so remarkably thoughtful I’m STILL reeling. she is another one that has a way of making you feel SO seen and like... perceiving genius in people that they didn’t even know they possessed. god.

@peachesmao ...... I mean, I genuinely have no idea if it’s okay for me to put you on blast like this or not but she gave me a BEAUTIFUL sketch of my main man, one Rustin Cohle, and... god. it’s. so. gorgeous. Adding it to my collection of the Redneck Birthday Art that @pt90 made for me a bit in advance of my birthday which was also unbelievably breathtaking... again I have no idea how to express my gratitude for these things, it’s just... so much... I love you guys

and throughout the day I have received sooo many messages from sooo many friends, privately and publicly, that I just! god!! I wanna shout you out all individually but you know who you are and my god I appreciate you so damn much.

and fuck... I’m so honored to say that wasn’t even all. my coworkers!!! my coworkers came out in droves to make me feel loved and special - when I walked in to work today I had THREE gifts waiting on my desk. and balloons! they got me a freaking cheesecake! they sang to me and hyped me up and made me feel important the whole day through. everyone I passed had something to say about it being my special day, even if they’d already said it. at the end of the day I asked one of them - how could this be! everyone was so MUCH today, did so much, treated me so well, and she told me it was simple - people like me. and that’s... oof, man. I don’t try to be any certain way, and yet... after 7 years at this company I am surrounded by people who genuinely like me and want to see me be happy on my birthday. that really means something.

to top it all off, one of my other best friends, who moved across the country a year ago, sent me a gift basket with candy and a balloon and it’s just so incredible to know that even though we don’t live in the same city, I’m on her mind and loved from 2,000 miles away.

tonight I go to a karaoke bar with a couple friends, a handful of coworkers, and some family. I’m going to wear a dress that I feel cute and confident in, I’m going to probably get drunk and still, more love is going to come my way. and it’s just... it’s overwhelming. I dont want to take any of this for granted. I started this month thinking that my birthday was doomed to be a bust - overlooked, unimportant, non-existent.... and yet here I am feeling absolutely celebrated by pretty much everyone I know and that’s... me?? ME? like, I realize all of this sounds like a humblebrag or something - look how much people love me! - but believe me when I say this was so, so needed for me. I have spent too long now feeling small or unworthy. but during that time I have also loved fiercely, with everything I have, and today... through some sort of karmic miracle, it has all fallen back onto me.

and that’s why I’m writing this post. because one day I will need it. one day I’ll be feeling low and I’ll need to look back and remember - I am loved, I am seen, and during a time when I needed it the most, there were people there. I am held. I dont expect that anyone has read this far - again, this really is just for me - but if you have, thank you again for being part of my world. it wouldn’t be the same without you in it.

#personal #whew boy... i just... today was really something #its not even over #but i needed to keep a record of it for myself #because... man... just... wow #i love you all #i love you all with everything i've got #and thats all i can really say

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metalbatandzenko · 4 years

Note

All of them. All the questions.

oof

1. Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

I have sliding doors on my closet so it’s one open one closed.

2. Do You Have Freckles?

Nope!

3. Can You Whistle?

Nope (:

4. Last Song You Listened To.

I...don’t remember lmao, I think it was 6 Inch by Beyonce

5. What Is Your Favorite Color?

I don’t know if I have one tbh.

6. Relationship Status.

Currently juggling seven reply guys bc rona has everyone acting out of line, but single.

7. What Is The Temperature Right Now?

46º

8. Did You Wake Up Cranky?

Yes sdkjfhdlkf

9. How Many Followers?

215.

10. Zodiac Sign.

Aries/Aries/Cancer.

11. What Is Your Eye Color?

Brown.

12. Take A Vitamin Daily?

No.

13. Do You Sing In The Shower?

Yes, usually it’s Mitski or songs from musicals because you know. Former theater kid.

14. What Books Are You Reading?

The Chronology of Water by Lidia Yuknavitch.

15. Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

“As in earlier days” from the poem The Walk by Thomas Hardy

16. Favorite Anime?

OPM is the only anime I watch. Being Japanese American and fem aligned means having. Not great associations with anime tbh.

17. Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

I honestly can’t remember the last time I cried in front of someone

WAIT YES I DO

It was November 23rd and my little cousin and I watched Over the Garden Wall. Both of us cried at the end.

18. Do You Collect Anything?

I have a knife collection and an old rock collection from when I was younger. I also unintentionally have a major makeup collection. My lipstick collection is borderline embarrassing. In my defense it started in 7th grade.

19. What Did You Have For Lunch?

I uh. I didn’t have lunch skfjhdsljfh

20. Do You Dance In The Car?

I do!

21. Favorite Animal?

Dude I fucking love crows.

22. Do You Watch The Olympics?

Some of them! My mom was really athletic growing up (as in one of those kids that plays a sport every season in high school), so she watches a lot of them. We tend to watch figure skating (which I know little about but have strong opinions on), gymnastics, synchronized swimming, track, and judo.

23. What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

Usually I’m in bed by 11 but I don’t go to sleep until 2am. Recently I’ve been getting to sleep at 7am.

24. Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

It is currently three in the morning so no akslkjsahd

25. Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

Ocean. I grew up in Northern California near the coast, and now I’m in a landlocked state. And you can kind of feel it, you know? The air doesn’t smell like salt and redwoods, the mountains aren’t there to hold up the sky so you just feel it pressing down on your chest. I miss the ocean.

26. Favorite Tumblr Blog?

I don’t know if I have a favorite. erikkillmongerdontpullout is funny and insightful, and I love dostoevskydocs’ poetry compilations.

27. Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

I grew up somewhere with access to really good tap water, so I’ll go with that.

28. What Makes You Happy?

Writing, spending time with friends, the feeling of dappled sunlight through the tree canopy.

29. Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

30. Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

With :)

31. Dogs Or Cats?

Dogs but I love cats too!

32. If You Were A Crayon What Color Would You Be?

Moss green!

33. PlayStation Or Xbox.

Xbox.

34. Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

Ocean. I don’t trust lakes.

35. Do You Believe In Magic?

I believe in the supernatural, I don’t know if magic’s the right word. It’s more like a belief that there’s something more to the world than what we’re able to perceive.

36. What Color Shirt Are You Wearing?

Charcoal grey.

37. Can You Curl Your Tongue?

Yes! I can also make my tongue into a clover.

38. Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

A bit of both. I can be pretty frugal when I’m by myself but I inherited the need to pay for everything for my friends from my mom, so if my friends are around, I will try to muscle my way into paying for everything. This is usually unsuccessful bc my friends are in the same boat.

39. Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

Yes. I’ve got a pink water bottle on my bedstand.

40. Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

I mean. OPM lkjshdflkjdh I’ve been hyperfixating on it, but I also am pretty obsessed with OTGW (I have been for years).

41. Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

No but I’ve had a few land on me.

42. Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

Depends on the person. Overall, I’d say no, but my friends have significant sway over me.

43. Do You Have Strange Dreams?

Yes.

44. Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

I actually do. But only for short flights. Anything longer than 4 hours makes my body really hurt.

45. Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

Moana.

46. Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

Sunflower seeds!

47. If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

Orville Peck or Carseat Headrest.

48. Are You A Picky Eater?

Nope!

49. Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

Yeah.

50. Do You Fear Thunder/Lightning?

No, I actually love them. I sleep best when it’s thundering.

51. Do You Like To Read/Write?

Yes to both. I’m a Creative Writing major so dkljfhljkdf

52. Do You Like Your Music Loud?

Yeah! Though not as loud as some people, my ears are sensitive.

53. Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

Wrap presents. I’m not a big fan of the smell of pumpkin, and wrapping presents is a tradition for my mom, brother and I. We’d put on some music, drink some hot chocolate, and wrap as many as possible. Then my brother and I would smuggle some wrapping paper to our rooms and wrap our mom’s gift.

54. Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

Somebody that I Used to Know-Gotye (listen the song still slaps)

55. What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

Winter/Spring transition. It hailed for 15 minutes straight yesterday.

56. What Are You Craving Right Now?

A popeyes 5 piece spicy chicken meal with fries and ranch. Can you tell I’ve thought about this?

57. Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

I don’t wanna.

58. What Is Your Gender?

Nonbinary, but vaguely girl adjacent.

59. Coffee Or Tea?

I think coffee. I drink more tea, but I also drink exclusively green tea and chai (like the traditional chai made with milk not the chai teabags) and I really am not a black/white/earl grey tea person.

60. Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

OOF Yeah I do

I’ve got a thousand word readers response to “The Other Boat” by E. M. Foster, a one thousand word journal about WWI, a reflective journal check in and a powerpoint I have to make for Sense and Sensibility for Brit Lit and I also am tutoring a few of my classmates

In my biological anthropology class I’ve got a Unit Exam and a few lectures to watch

For my internship/Teachers Assistant position I’ve got 17 10 page rough drafts to read and give in depth comments on as well as a portfolio I have to assemble for next year’s TA bc I’m transferring, phone meetings with the 17 students who wrote those rough drafts, and I’ve gotta compile some resources for my professor

I need to finish my memoir for my independent study and I have to present. my nonfiction memoir. to my classmates. on Zoom. I’m one of two people doing a nonfiction memoir for their independent study the rest are doing fiction, poetry or a literary analysis paper so like. My classmates are gonna be talking about their fiction piece and then I’m gonna be giving a 15 minute reading and Q&A about a piece that focuses on my trauma and being hate crimed so that’s fun.

I also gotta get some stuff done for my school’s lit magazine.

61. What Is Your Sexuality?

A known bisexual™

62. Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

I try to but I forget.

63. Favorite Pokémon?

Togepi, Blissey and Togekiss.

64. Favorite Social Media?

I hate to say it but it’s tumblr.

65. What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

If it’s longer than six stories, I’m not watching it. Unless I know they’re gonna be fun or we’re really close then I will.

66. Do You Get Homesick?

A bit. I’m still really homesick for my hometown tbh because that’s where all my family except for my parents are. I’m really close with my extended family, so being isolated from them feels like there’s an emptiness at my side.

67. Are You A Virgin?

No.

68. What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

Redken Frizz Dismiss. I got those big fucking bottles you can get at Ulta where it’s like a gallon of shampoo so I haven’t had to buy any in over a year.

69. If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

I’ve slept in my car before and I will do so again most likely. Also $60 is too much to spend for a motel room.

70. Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

Yes. Though I’m much closer to my mom than my dad.

71. Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

Idk shit about movies tbh.

72. Do You Miss Your Ex?

One of them yes, the others no. But the one I miss I also acknowledge is someone who had their place in my life at the time and helped me through some rough shit, but no longer has a place in my life. I appreciate the hell out of him though, and we’re on good terms.

73. What Is Your Favorite Quote Right Now?

I’ve got two!

“I don’t know how to stay tender with this much blood in my mouth” –Ophelia, Hamlet

and

"Suffering feels religious if you do it right." –Chelsea Hodson

74. What Eye Color Do You Find Sexiest?

Brown. Especially the almost black-brown eyes.

75. Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

Yes to both.

76. What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

Chocolate covered pretzels ljhflfsd

77. What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

Toon Blast and 2048.

78. Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

Holy shit I hate this question. Yes, of course I would. I don’t know why mentioning that the person is homeless is relevant. Homeless people are not somehow less worthy of CPR?? What the fuck.

79. Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

...yes

80. Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

I’ve briefly skimmed over someone’s page after meeting them but I don’t lurk.

81. Do You Like Meeting New People?

Depends on my mood.

82. Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

I hate my hands so this was pushing it.

83. Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

Closed.

84. What Are Three Things You Did Today?

Corrected papers, walked my dog, did some writing.

85. What Do You Wear To Bed?

T-shirt and shorts.

86. List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

Dude I can’t do that I have too many, I’ve been buying makeup for 7 years and I used to work next to a sephora

My makeup routine pre-rona was:

Sephora brand moisturizer

Milk Hydrogrip primer

Fenty Pro Filtr Hydrating Foundation

Maybelline Age Rewind Concealer

Anastasia Brow Definer

Glossier Cloud Paint

Fenty Sunstalkr Bronzer

Fenty Liquid Flyliner

Fenty Flypencil

Fenty Full Frontal Mascara

Fenty Glossbomb

It’s...an expensive routine.

87. Are You A Day Or Night Person?

Night to early morning.

88. List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

I answered this one and I don’t want to reanswer it tbh ldkjfhds

89. Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

I genuinely can’t remember any of my dreams right now. I remember a snippet of one where I was in a cave and I looked at the wall and I could see water running down it, reflecting in the torchlight but that’s literally it.

90. Favorite Soda Drink?

I’m a big pomegranate person, so Italian soda’s my go to.

91. What Sounds Are Your Favorite?

The sizzle of meat hitting a hot wok, rain, hail, thunder, the crunch of dry leaves. I also love the sound of Simone de Rochefort’s laugh. It’s so good.

92. Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

Jeans.

93. How Do You Look Right Now?

Shitty.

94. Name Something That Relaxes You.

Skyrim ldskjfhd

95. What Tattoo Do You Want?

I really want to get my family’s mon on my ribcage and my mom’s Japanese name somewhere. I don’t know how my pain tolerance is but if I can handle it, I’d want to get at least a partial sleeve.

96. Favorite YouTuber?

Polygon and Watcher.

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furvillaconfessions · 4 years

Text

@/post/188704073687/

Hi I'm one of the selfshipping adults your parents warned you about, I'm pretty sure you've seen me on the selfshipping thread since you took the time and effort to check everyone's age

Let me start off with that I don't actually take my own selfshipping seriously personally and it's mostly a tool of banter for me, I do want to point out I have ADD, autism, depression, and anxiety, sometimes I end up hyperfixating on a specific character who mostly will be a comfort character but sometimes a f/o, thinking and talking about them makes me happy, especially during a depressive episode, just like any other thing I have a hyperfixation on, it helps me feel better (why else do you think I named myself Uendo and put pictures of him on my profile, even my Tumblr name is a reference to another character I used to have a crush on)

Every character I ever had a crush on are characters I look back on fondly but have no major attachment to anymore and who never revolved around my entire world (lest it be a hyperfixation but I digress, it was never in unhealthy amounts), right now I only have one character from Stardew Valley I'd call my crush which I mostly live through my farmer character, I don't have any desire to create content for it or make it a big part of my life, this is just my way to forget about my depression and anxiety for a while

There are many things that make me happy and having a comfort character or f/o isn't different from it, especially because I don't control who or what I will have an interest in or will hyperfixate on (you can argue that you can control it by looking into the content itself but you still have no control over whether or not you're going to develop an interest or attachment to it)

This is my "normal", I don't need to get help for it because it's not obstructing and harming my or someone else's life in any way, everyone else's "normal" will always be different from someone else's "normal" and me having the things I listed already made my "normal" very much different from everyone else's "normal" because these conditions will always influence and affect my behavior, ways of thinking, ways of perceiving, ways of feeling, etc.

Finding happiness in fictional characters isn't any different from finding happiness in celebrities or other people in your life, you can maintain a healthy interest in the character like you would with any other person without your entire life and being revolving around it, if anything I'm currently more hyperfixated on my favorite band of real people than I actually am on my comfort characters and f/o

Developing attraction to either fictional or real people is and always will be a normal thing, attraction is mostly based on personality and/or looks, and if a fictional character just so happens to match those attraction points there's nothing wrong with feeling attracted to them

Having interests, childish desires, puppy crushes on both fictional and real people, etc. won't stop the moment you turn into an adult, your brain won't turn into "fully grownup mature adult taxes and newspapers only" mode the moment you turn 18

Stop being bitter and let people have their fun if it helps them feel better, you don't have to agree with it but you also shouldn't call it "not normal", you don't know these people and you don't know what their "normal" is, only if there's obvious signs of something unhealthy and harmful going on can you call it not normal, seeing someone casually say they have a crush on Sans Undertale is no grounds to call them "not normal" and say they need to seek help for it because there's nothing else indicating they may struggle with mental or other problems that need to be addressed

Sorry for the wall of text, but I really needed to kill this idea that it's somehow a mental problem and unhealthy for adults to have crushes on fictional characters the moment they're not a kid anymore, especially because none of this affects anyone else's life but the person who is crushing on the character, just close the page and move on with your life, what these people do is none of your business

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