Nesta: You know, Rhysand gives Feyre flowers everyday. I wish you'd do that too.
Cassian: Okay.
Later that same day.
Cassian, handing Feyre flowers:
Feyre:
Cassian: I don't know, I'm confused as well.
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Feyre: Rhysand and I are no longer dating.
Rhys: Feyre, that’s a horrible way of telling people we’re married.
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Rhysand: You love me, right?
Feyre: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.
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Azriel: I ’m tired.
Rhys: Hi tired, I am Rhysand.
Azriel: Hi Rhysand, I am tired of your bullshit.
Nesta: Same.
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Eris: I’m writing my autobiography. Do you have any tips?
Azriel: Kill off the main character
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Just had this idea of a cute lil comic art thing of the batboys where Cass is leading them through some training exercises and says "get in formation" but then Az fucks off for like 20 minutes and comes back out of breath and Rhys and Cass just look at each other then back at Az and Az is like "???You said get information???"
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Feyre: Could you be serious for five minutes? Please?
Rhysand: My record is four, but I think I can do it.
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Rhys : *Giving orders*
Azriel : *Not interested*
Feyre : *making important decisions*
Azriel : *Not interested*
Literally anyone : *Talking*
Azriel : * Not interested *
Elain : *makes a random noise*
Azriel, smiling : Yes, Elain?
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Cassian: okay, before you say anything- yes, I know we didn’t have to blow up that building and yes, I know you specifically told us to not do it and yes, I don’t know where I’m going with this but I do know I’ve reached the end of my sentence
Rhys: *nods*
Cassian: oh my gods, did that really work?
Rhys: no, I’m just making peace with the disappointment you bring into my life
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rhysand to nesta: hey cass, wanna hang out with me and az tonight?
nesta: are you drunk? cassian is right behind you!
rhysand: what’s the point in asking him if you decide everything?
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Its always "I love you" and never "I bought an estate for you"
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Feyre: What are you writing?
Azriel: The Spring Court wants to know what kind of weapons we are bringing to the meeting of the High Lords. I'm letting them know it's private information.
Feyre, looking over Azriel's shoulder: This just says "fuck around and find out" in calligraphy.
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Nesta, furious: What do you mean we have homework tonight? I have books to read.
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Azriel: What do you think Cassian and Feyre will do for a distraction?
Rhysand: They’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.
*Building explodes and several alarms sound off*
Rhysand: ... or they could do that.
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Azriel, in line at a coffee shop: Can I get a venti vanilla latte with uhh, seven espresso shots?
Cassian, in line behind him: the cauldron, just do cocaine.
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ACOTAR Summary
Lucien: How long are we going to let her do that?
Tamlin: *sighs* Just... just give her a minute
Feyre: *still pushing on a door that is clearly labelled pull*
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