Elain: Be careful when you go outside, it's ass eating season!

Lucien: What??

Elain: There's ice everywhere. If you're not careful, you'll slip and eat ass!

Lucien: Who told you that?

Elain: Jurian.

Elain: I love knitting needles. I can make a scarf. I can make a hat. I can stab your eyes out. I can make mittens.

Cassian: What was the middle part??

Elain: I can make a hat!

cassian: so if feyre finds out what we plan on doing with nyx, where should we meet up?

azriel: the afterlife, I guess?

Feysand’s Daughter Headcanon #4

- Rhysand sitting down obediently and allowing his little daughter to colour in around his tattoos with her glittery pens.

- Later, the inner circle complements him on the splodges of colour visible

- the inner circle have a pool day and feysand's daughter jumps around in her little swimsuit. She is distressed that her dad's coloured tattoos will drip away if he goes in the pool. Feyre grins and places an air bubble around Rhys' arms. After a day at the pool, the glittery arm art hasn't changed a bit.

- uncle cassian falling to the ground in mock pain as the little girl pretends to kick him, and she giggles. Azriel yelps as Cassian accidentally flips him into the pool with him in the drama of his pain

- “what if I’m a sea monster” Uncle Cas warns her and hauls her up into his arms and over his head as she shrieks with giggles

- Rhys thinks Feyre looks absolutely ravishing in her swimming suit

Aelin : do you have a date for valentine's day?

Fenrys : yeah, February 14th.

Aelin : i- nevermind.

The fact that Gwyn and Az can both sing is amazing.

Wren: Lei, get up, you’re being lazy.

Lei: Lazy is such a strong word, Wren. I like to call it ‘Selective Participation’.

Wren:

Wren: Idiot is such a weak word, I prefer to call it ‘Lei’.

Lei: Ugh, fine. I’ll get up!

Feyre and Rhysand’s relationship in a nutshell

One of them: Is depressed and has no will to live.

The other one, automatically: Heh heh seductive flirting go brrrr.  

Azriel, getting up from a nap:

Thank you, sleep.

Azriel:

Or as I call you, Death Practice.

Me: Whoa— if you look closely, The Marauders and The Bat Boys have the SAME ENERGY.

Non-reader Friend: What are you–

Me: Cassian has Sirius Black energy, Rhysand somewhat resembles James Potter and Azriel is Remus Lupin of the trio...

Non-reader Friend: Dude stahp you're linking two entirely different worlds!

Me: Oh shushh you Illyrian Muggle

Lorcan : there are 21 letters in the alphabet.

Elide : no wth are you dumb, there's 26.

Lorcan : oh right, i must have forgotten URAQT

Elide :

Elide : Lorcan, you're 500. You must know the alphabets by now.

-Aelin and Rhysand meeting for the first time-

Rhysand: *screams*

Aelin: *screams louder*

Rowan: Shouldn’t we stop them??

Feyre: No, wait, I wanna see who wins.

[ACOSF SPOILERS]

If Rowan had been there, I'm pretty sure this is how it would've gone down:

Rowan: Hello, Feyre.

Rhys: *glaring at the not ugly Fae male talking to his pregnant mate*

Feyre: *smiles* Long time no see bro!

Rowan: And what's this I smell!

Rhys: *waving at him madly from the background and giving him death threats*

Rowan: The winged boy in your stomach doesn't match your... anatomy you know. You didn't even tell me you were pregnant, bae!

Rowan: *slurps tea loudly*

Rhys: THAT'S IT YOU'RE DEAD BIRDBOY

[side note my keyboard auto corrected Rowan to Titan like Titan Whitethorn lmfao]

Cassian: What do you crave more than anything else?

Emerie: Stability.

Gwyn: Peace of mind.

Nesta: Chocolate chip pancakes.

Honestly elucien do be like this

*Elucien somewhere beautiful in Velaris*

Elain: I like the view.

Lucien: You do? You're my best view.

Elain: *stares silently at him for a few moments*

Elain: Nah

Lol please don't come at me elucien shippers.

Cassian: Fuck!

Nesta: Don't fucking curse in front of our daughter, Cassian!

Cassian: *looks to Nesta*

Nesta: *realizing what just had happened*

Feyre: I have to go right away to face The Weaver and I might never come back.

Rhysand’s mood on their way there:

Acotar fandom: Merr, could you please pick up all the trash?

Merr: of course

Acotar fandom: MERR WHAT FUCK ARE DOING PUT RHYSAND DOWN

Cassian: Oh just so you know, it's very muggy outside

Rhys: Cassian,I swear, if I step outside and all of our mugs are on the front lawn...

Cassian: Sips coffee from bowl.

This is too good not to share XD.