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#incorrect avengers

Loki: I hate touching people.

Loki: The only physical contact I take joy in is hand-to-hand combat.

Thor: You and Stark are literally hugging right now.

Loki: *hugging Tony tighter* That’s something completely different.

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Natasha, to the team: What is Y/n holding right now?

Steve: A pumpkin

Tony: Obviously

Natasha, turning to Y/n: Tell them what you think it is.


Y/n: A Halloween apple

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*y/n showed up with a swollen lip*

Bucky: what happened to your lip?

y/n: got stung by a bee

the bee:

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Steve, knocking on the front door of an apartment: Loki, we know you’re there! Open the door!

Loki, knowing that avengers will come for him, yelling back: Door is open, just come in.

Loki: Make yourself at home. I finished making dinner just in time.

The Avengers: You what?

Loki: Well, I knew you were going to come today, so I made dinner for you. I would be very bad host, if I wasn’t prepared.

The Avengers:

Tony: Despite all, he’s right and it smells really good. Is that pork neck?

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Steve trying to get Bucky to cut his hair: WITH YOUR HAIR AND MY MAN TITS PEOPLE WILL THINK WE ARE A LESBIAN CUPLE!!!!

Y/n from another room: I THOUGHT YOU WERE AMERICANS?!

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Steve: Who besides Bucky and I know everything about the Great Depression?

Y/N: I thought it was called the Grand Canyon?

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Bucky: Steve is going on a mission in England.

Y/N: WHAT! Who is going to be Steve?


Y/N: I can be Steve!


Y/N: Y/yyy!

Y/N: Perfect!

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Bucky: Fine!

Steve: Double Fine!

Bucky : I taught u that

Steve: And I taught u everything else!

Bucky: Then way don’t I know anything!

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Loki: I’ve never been able to “keep calm and carry on”, but I’ve gotten very good at “internalize your rage and pretend you can function”.

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Thor: Aghhhh! I burned my hand!

Bruce: Quick! Put it on something cold!

Thor *puts it on Loki’s heart*: Way better


Loki: I hate you

Loki: But I’m going to do this to Odin tomorrow

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hey kid
sorry mister stark i'm too busy to talk right now, i've got to sell my turnips
okay i'll bite, why are you selling turnips?
how else do you expect me to pay off my house loan, mister stark?
... you know i'm a billionaire, right?
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