Bruce: Why are you two fighting?
Damian: Kent keeps insisting I’m a clone.
Clark: Jon now that’s not very nice.
Jon: But it’s true. He was made the same Connor was, and everyone calls him a clone.
Clark: Well it’s different-
Jon: How?
Bruce: Yeah Clark, how?
*Outside, ten minutes later, as Bruce and Clark argue*
Tim: This was the best idea we’ve ever had.
Kon: Totally.
Damian: Tt, I believe we are owed payment?
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Kon, Bart, and Tim: [screaming]
Cassie, running into the room: What's wrong, Tim?!
Kon: Why are you only asking Tim?! We're all screaming!
Cassie: Because Tim doesn't scream unless it's an emergency. You two scream whenever you have the chance.
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Damian: Bruce Jr. Wayne.
Jon: No, he should be called Clark Jr. Kent.
Tim: Forseti. God of justice, peace and reconciliation.
Jason: Peace? Not if he’s going to be living in this house.
Dick: What about Justice Kent-Wayne?
Jon: I like it!
Damian: Vengeance Wayne-Kent.
Kon: Brark Waykent.
Tim: Eww.
Jason: Superbat.
Dick: That sounds more like a superhero name.
Kon: Cluce Kentayne.
Tim: Go away Conner.
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Kon: See, I’m straight but like if there was a man that I would marry, it would be Tim
Cassie: How do you feel about that Tim?
Tim: …It’s not helping with the rumours
Cassie: I think the kiss you guys shared on my birthday isn’t helping with the rumours
Kon: Yeah, I just hate that you didn’t give me enough tongue.
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Clark, physically moving Hal away from Bruce like he's a pestering cat: Sorry, I need him for a second
Hal:
Hal: what the hell--
Bruce: is there a reason you picked Hal up like Alfred the Cat?
Clark: yes :( Bruce, can you give me some parenting advice?
Bruce, contemplating stabbing himself with a batarang: No
Clark: Great! It's about Kon.
Bruce, knowing damn well Kon is his favourite super: go on
Clark: I think he has a crush on this boy who does conspiracy theories on YouTube, -- and he thinks this Bernard kid is a better writer than me, which, hey I won a Pfizer and you can't spell anything without autocorrect, --
Bruce: Clark.
Clark: Right! How do I make him understand I'm skeptical because Bernard is a relatively good writer and not because he's a boy?
Bruce: We had to stop you from ripping out Mike Pence's spine last week
Clark: Come on, Bruce, that doesn't mean anything! Any decent person would do that
Meanwhile:
Kon: What do I do, Cass? You always have the best solutions
Cass:
Kon: Why didn't I think of that sooner! You're the best, Cassie
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some Wayne gala shenanigans
Damian: Some people have no shame.
Jon, a plate of brûlée on his hand: What do you mean?
Damian: Tt. Those so called classy, but actually pretentious women are embarrassing themselves for not understanding the memo.
Jon: What memo?
Damian turns his eyes away from the sight of some women, trying their best to get his brothers' attention and to the said memo.
As said memo are two redheads, and a half kryptonian and half human eating by the food area.
more women approach his brothers.
Damian, frowns: We need to save Richard, Todd and Drake.
Jon: They do look uncomfortable.
Damian, sighs: I have to enter the battlefield.
Jon, pats Damian's shoulder: You will be remembered by your bravery, Dames.
Damian breathes and walks towards the inner circle.
before Damian can even say anything else, the women have started cooing at him.
Damian internally cringes and he hopes this would be worth it.
thankfully, Damian don't have to suffer long as Wally, Roy and Conner join the commotion.
Roy: Sorry, Jaybaby. *he has that crooked smile, that Jason personally adores, as he wraps an arm around his waist* I was caught up at the food buffet. Want something to eat?
Jason, internally thanks the heavens for Roy and leans close to him: Starved. Excuses, everyone.
Todd is saved. Check.
Wally: Come on, honey. *holds Dick's hand and leads him away* I deserve a dance.
Dick, smiles like an idiot and holds Wally's hand: I better go, ladies. He gets a temper. Have a good night.
Richard is saved. Check.
Conner, touches Tim's shoulder then his cheek: Want something to drink? You seem tired, babe.
Tim, finally feeling awake for the first time since this happened and touches Conner's hand that's on his face: Yes, please, babe. Ladies, will you excuse me?
Drake is saved. Check.
the ladies are left speechless. some are jealous. some are frustrated they can't get the Wayne fortune. but, some are in awe.
Damian, lightly smirks. It's never gonna happen, ladies. Now, enjoy your night. Excuse me.
he finds Jon by the sweets section.
Damian, nudges Jon's arm: Thank you for that, Jon.
Jon, smiles: It's nothing. I needed to save you too.
they give each other a high five then proceed to challenge the other on who can eat the most chocolate covered strawberries.
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