#incorrect hetalia quotes
Seychelles: In your opinion, what is the height of stupidity?
Canada: Hm, good question.
Canada, turning to America: How tall are you?
America: We are the same height.
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Arthur: What the fuck is wrong with you??
Francis: What? No good morning?
Arthur: Good morning, what the fuck is wrong with you??
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Finland: We just ate, why're you making pancakes?
Sweden: They're for Hanatamago.
Finland: Why are you making pancakes for the dog then?
Sweden: She doesn't know how.
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Romano: Have you ever seen something that just changes your life and you're just like 'huh'?
America: I saw you.
Romano: Honestly that's very sweet but it really makes this awkward because I was going to show you a picture of this really neat pasta dish.
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APH Poland: [Catholic, walks into a Protestant church with no depictions of Mary ]
APH Poland: Where is my mom?!
APH Prussia: [Protestant, walks into a Catholic church balls to the walls with paintings, sculptures and candles]
APH Prussia: Why is there so much clutter?!
APH Russia: [Orthodox, walks into a western church]
APH Russia: W h e r e a r e t h e b o n e s 👁️👄👁️
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America: What the fuck is lgbtq+??? Y’all have gay premium?
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Germany: I think your cousin (Sicily) is overcompensating for something.
Germany: The trains run UNDER time. Only someone compensating for something would do that.
Italy:... are you trying to impress me by saying you're not compensating for anything, because YOUR trains are always late?
Germany:... I mean -
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Britain: F is for Fucker France.
France: B is for Bitch Britain.
America: Uhm, what are you guys doing?
Britain: ..and A is for Asshole America.
Canada: And this is why I stay quiet.
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England: *reading recipe* Beat three bird eggs…
England: At what? Hand-to-hand combat?
America: Must be.
France: Get away from the cooking pot, you two!
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HWS Poland: How's the most handsome man in the world doing?
HWS Lithuania: I don't know, how are y-
HWS Estonia, from the other side of the room: I'm fine thanks
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Gilbert: -mentally overanalysing the concept of an ex-nation being with a nation- I'm going to be truthful, sometimes I feel like you're out of my league.
Arthur: It's the eyebrows, isn't it?
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Prussia: You’ll have a hard time believing this because it never happens, but I made a mistake.
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Romano: There. How do I look?
Gilbert: Like a cheap French harlot.
Romano, angered: French?!
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Denmark: What if I pour coffee in my cereal instead of milk?
Norway, taking the coffee pot as he walks by: What if you don’t.
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Italy: I sort of did something and I need your advice, but I don't want a lot of judgement and criticism.
Romano: And you came to me?
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APH America: You are driving on the wrong side of the road.
APH England: Sorry, I'm English.
APH America: (shouting) It's the wrong soid of the roade ye was droivin on, innit?
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Germany: We should stop worrying about Italy and let him live his own life!
Japan: Do you want to follow him or should I?
Germany: Let’s both do it.
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[cooking pasta together]
hws Germany: *holds spaghetti above pan* Is that enough for both of us?
hws Veneziano: A little bit more
hws Germany: *breaks spaghetti in half*
hws Veneziano: CHE CAZZ-- Ludo, ma tu sei pazzo 😦
hws Germany: What?
hws Veneziano: Ludo, tu-- Now I have to eat this shit pasta so short 😦
hws Germany: What do you mean?!
hws Veneziano: This is no spaghetti, my love, come on!
hws Germany: It didn't fit in the pan!
hws Veneziano: But you have to understand me dai you cannot cut the pasta so! 😦
hws Germany: It just didn't fit in the pan!?
hws Veneziano: 🤌🤌🤌🤌
hws Veneziano: You go in the pan, my love! 🤨
hws Veneziano: You cut the pasta! You know this is illegal in Italy 😔
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Japan: What does the “F” stand for in your name?
America: My middle name
Japan: No, like, what is it-
America: Alfred Fucknugget Jones
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England: I’m bisexual
England: but also I hate everyone
England: so it’s more like
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