Peter *awake at 3am*: who tf named it “emotional baggage” and not “griefcase?”
Tony: So kid, anybody you like at school?
Peter: Well I sexually identify as a mistake so what does that say?
Tony: That says “another tharapy appointment.”
Peter: *sends a picture of a guy throwing a fidget spinner*
Peter: Consider this a warning
Peter: Oh wrong number, sorry.
Tony: Who was that for?
Tony: Peter who the fuck was that for??
Peter with his super hearing and his teenage hormones: OH MY GOD STOP BLINKING SO LOUDLY.
Tony, confused and frightened: I’m sORRY?????
Tony at dinner: yesterday i caught Peter high.
Harley: did he say where he got the pot from?
Tony: yes his best friend
Harley *tearing up*: he really said that
Tony: Don’t you dare put a nose, it doesn’t deserve one.
Peter: Everyone deserves a nose, Mr Stark
Peter: I wish I could get the same amount of praise as a sham-WOW.
Tony: I’m going to hug you now so shut up.
Tony: I’m gonna stand outside. So if anybody asks
Tony: tell them I’m outstanding.