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#incorrect karate kid edits
chaotictommy · 2 years
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Daniel: *calls Johnny* Hey Babe...
Tommy: *Answers* This is Johnny’s Bro...
Jimmy: *Grabs Phone from Tommy* Do U love Johnny?
Daniel: *flustered* I’ll — I’ll take a bullet for him
Dutch: *grabbing the phone from Jimmy* Lovely, meet at our house in the backyard in 10 mins
Daniel: ...
Bobby: *Yelling from close by* No Dutch that’s murder!!!
Johnny: *picking up the phone, confused* Hello?
*Bobby and Dutch bickering in the background*
Daniel: .............
Johnny: *still confused* Hello?
Daniel: ....... *Hangs up*
Bonus:
Johnny: *Shaking his head in defeat* Guys, you can’t keep doing this, you’re gonna scare him off.
Dutch: We were just trying to be friendly
Bobby: *under his breath* Yeah, like murder has ever been a friendly gesture
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v-via-a · 9 months
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Another edit i made ✨💕
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I made this Lawrusso incorrect quotes thing for my Cobra Kai Instagram and I love Johnny’s face in the last pic lmao he looks like he’s so done with Bobby
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oceluna · 4 years
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katobobato · 4 years
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GET TO KNOW ME TAG GAME
I was tagged by @staerrylights​, sorry for taking so long to do this :)
1. What do you prefer to be called name wise?
both online and sometimes irl i go by kato although some people also call me kate (which i used to hate when i was little but it’s growing on me a little)
2. When is your birthday?
september 20th
3. Where do you live?
in the uk, right near the very bottom :)
4. Three things you are doing right now?
listening to music, writing this and thinking about watching some anime
5. Four fandoms that have piqued your interest right now?
idk, maybe the dragon quest fandom bc they seem like fun plus the games are great. three more, um, idk moa maybe bc txt have some bops. i honestly can’t think of any more rn, i’m already too much of a multistan with everything (not just music-wise) :(
6. How is the pandemic treating you?
i mean, finishing college from home was interesting and starting uni from home will probably be just as weird. i haven’t gotten to go out all that much and my family are driving me insane. i also miss my grandparents because i haven’t been able to see them that much but i’m hoping to be able to see them and my friends some more now that the lockdown is lifting slightly.
7. A song you can’t stop listening to right now?
okay so i’ve got two, love me harder - woodz and monster bc damn irene and seulgi snapped.
8. Recommend a movie?
idk, there are so many good ones. i’m currently obsessed with howls moving castle and spirited away so i guess one of those. (seriously tho, they’re so good)
9. How old are you?
18
10. School, university, occupation, other?
starting uni in october (a month late bc of the pandemic😥)
11. Do you prefer hot or cold?
i love both of different reasons. i love sitting outside in the sun during the summer but i also love snuggling up with a blanket and some hot chocolate in the winter and watching a movie.
12. Name one fact others may not know about you.
i used to do karate when i was a kid (that’s about the most interesting thing i have)
13. Are you shy?
with new people, yes, but as soon as i’m comfortable with you it’s honestly hard to get me to stop talking. i’m one of those ‘seems quiet but is actually loud af’ people.
14. Do you have any preferred pronouns?
She/her
15. Any pet peeves?
interrupting someone mid-conversation/sentence (i do this sometimes too but usually don’t realise and then stop myself so they can continue). i also hate incorrect grammar :)
16. What’s your favorite “dere” type?
tsundere (because they’re always interesting to watch and generally have some good character development) and bakadere (because they’re funny, cute and relatable)
17. Rate your life 1-10. 1 being really crappy and 10 being the best you could ever be.
7/10. i like my life most of the time and i have good friends and people to talk to but i do have family issues, not that i don’t love my family. i love them all so much but thanks to my granddad (whom i’ve never once met in my whole life) the whole of my mum’s side of the family, specially her, my uncle and my aunt, all have issues and ptsd which still affects them now which then has a knock on effect on everyone else. i’m a pretty optimisic person and look more to the ups rather than the downs, plus i do what i can to help the people i care about when i can, which helps me look at things in a more positive way no matter how crap life gets which is why i’d give my life a 7 because i know there are people who have it a lot worse than i do :)
18. What’s your main blog?
this one :)
19. List your side blogs and what they are used for.
@katoresources​ - this is for graphic resources i make and upload to deviantart
@katosficrecs - this is for me to reblog fics i liked and recommend
@katobobatoedits - this is for my edits, fan art and the such
20. Is there anything you think people need to know about you before becoming friends with you?
i am a little weird but that makes me interesting and although i may seem socially awkward and shy (which i certainly am), i’m always up for talking to new people and making friends.
Tagging: @excusemin, @gettingtooemotional and anyone else who wants to do this :)
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jumpsitehq · 6 years
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1000+ Whatsapp Status | Best Whatsapp Status Attitude, Cool, More
Today I am publishing the first article on 1000+ Whatsapp Status | Best Whatsapp Status Attitude, Cool, More. I will add thousands of Whatsapp Status to my blog. I will write the Whatsapp Status myself to my make Status site more unique and good looking than others sites. So today I am going to share 1000+ Whatsapp Status | Best Whatsapp Status Attitude, Cool, More.
Best Whatsapp Status
These Nice Cool Status are written by me and my Team members. I am sure that your Friends will like these Cool Status collection in English. You can check out the Whatsapp Status below. If you face any problems with copying these Whatsapp Statuses then report us, We will solve your problems as soon as possible.
Attitude Whatsapp Status
Waiting For Wi-Fi Network. I Forgive But Never Forgot. I May Be Wrong. But I Doubt It. Nobody Move. I Just Lost My Mind. I Am Hot Dude With A Cool Attitude. Sorry Vegetarians We Can’T Pretend. Follow Your Heart But Don;T Be Stupid. My Attitude Based On How You Treat Me. I Not Perfect But I Am Limited Addition. I’M Cool But Global Warming Made Me Hot. Stop Checking My Status ! Go Get A Life! I’M Not Nerd. I Am Just Smarter Than You. I’M Sorry If I Change But You Changed Too. I Am Who I Am. Your Approval Is Not Needed. I’M Not Special, I’M Just Limited Edition. Your Silence Is The Best Response To A Fool. I Am Me And I Won’T Change Myself For Anyone. Don't Take My Kindness As A Sign Of Weakness. Excellence Is Not A Skill. It Is An Attitude. Everything That Kills Me Makes Me Feel Alive. I’M Sorry My Fault. I Forgot You’Re An Idiot. I’M Poor. I Can’T Pay Attention In Class Room. Before You Judge Me, Make Sure You Are Perfect. You Attitude May Hurt Me But Mine Can Kill You. Yeah, You – The One Reading My Status, Get Lost!
Cool Whatsapp Status
I’m the dude with cool attitude. Silence is the best response to a fool. When I die, I want my grave to offer free Wifi so that people visit more often. My life my rules. Just saw the smartest person when I was in front of the mirror. I love food and sleep. If I give you a bit of food or text you all night, that means something. I don’t care what people think or say about me… Please don’t get confused between my attitude and personality! Diets are hard because I get hungry. If I delete your number, you’re basically deleted from my life. Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you. Be yourself. everyone else is already taken. If life is not smiling at you, give it a good tickling. I changed my password everywhere to ‘incorrect.’ That way when I forget it, it always reminds me. A business that makes nothing but money is a poor business. It’s very difficult to be great. Losers prove this point continuously. Every day is a second chance. If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door. Do not give up, the beginning is always the hardest. I’m cool but Summer made me hot! Totally available!! Please disturb me! Life is a journey. I am a traveler. Life must go on. I’m jealous of my parents, I’ll never have a kid as cool as theirs. Always trying to cool myself. Some people need to open their small minds instead of their big mouths. I do not get drunk – I get awesome. A jealous woman does better research than FBI. I will win, not immediately but definitely. Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them. Warning!!! I know KARATE and few other oriental words. Not all men are fools, some stay bachelor. Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up. AwesoME ends with ME and Ugly starts with You. I’m cool but Summer made me hot! I don’t need to explain myself because, I know I’m right. Keep calm and enjoy life. I got less but I got best! Always trying to cool my self. Nowadays, “Cool” means- “I really don’t care.” You hate drama? Cool. Stop starting it. It’s my life so keep your nose out of it… I love haters, they keep me motivated. Turn your problem into profit. The only reason I am fat is because a tiny body couldn’t store all this personality. Get as rude as possible and don’t let anyone tell you how to live. Life is like Facebook. People will like your problems & comment on them but no one’s gonna solve them because everyone is busy in updating their. It’s funny how people say they miss you, but don’t even make an effort to see you. Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going. Get up every morning, imagine a future then make it happen. Love Whatsapp Status I want to be in your arms, where you hold me tight and never let me go. I don’t like waiting, I’m so impatient. But I’ll wait forever, as long as I end up with u. The person who makes u happiest is the person who can hurt you the most. No matter how “busy” a person is…if they really love, they will always find the time for you ! Every night I go to sleep hoping and wishing that dreams come true. Every night, in my dreams, I am with you. Love is the beginning of everything in life; it leads to unimaginable happiness. Now and forever. These are the two things I think about when I say I love you. There is no reason to say I love you without a way to prove that it is undeniably true and sincere. I fell in love because of a smile, but I stayed in love because of your heart. The hardest part of acting like you don’t care is knowing how much you actually do. Dear Ladies if he takes time to argue with you, he cares about you more than you think. Love is so strange... sometimes it becomes a reason to live life..!! and sometimes it becomes a reason to leave life !! I want an honest relationship. no secrets. no lies. no cheating. Don’t give them the keys to your heart if you know they will lose it. Love is about taking risks not being stupid. I love you more today than yesterday but I do love you less today than I will tomorrow. True Love = No doubts + No jealousy + No worries then life is good. Dear heart, please fall in love only when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
Sad Whatsapp Status
A Lie is a Lie, no matter how big or how small. U Cant Switch Off Ur Feelings Just Because Other Person Did 💔💔 Sorry heart, but I am listening to my brain this time. I know better. I don’t regret my past. I just regret the time I have wasted with the wrong people. Love is when you look into someone’s eyes and see everything you ever need. The Greatest Pain That Comes From Love, Is Loving Someone Who Are Not Here. Sometimes It’S Better To Be Alone. Nobody Can Hurt You In Life! I Feel So Far Away From The One I Wish To Hold In My Arms. The greatest pain that comes from love is loving someone you can never have. Sometimes, you have to smile to hide your fears and laugh to hide your tears. A beautiful girl with gorgeous EYES, a hidden world of HURT & LIES. It isn’t the bad memories that make you sad, but the best ones that you can’t bring it back. Pretending to be happy when you’re in pain is just an example of how strong you are as a person. You’re better off being alone than being with someone who makes you feel like you’re alone. I love to cry in the rain because that’s the only time no one can hear the pain. I don’t understand why life keeps trying to teach me lessons I don’t want to learn.
Romantic Whatsapp Status
You’Re The Best Thing I Never Knew Needed. You’Re Just Too Cute If Only You Were Mine. You Do Most Adorable Things Without Realizing. Your Voice For Me Is Better Than All My Favorite Songs. Love Is Knowing That Someone Is Always Be There For You. When I See You, I Just Smile & Say ” My Day Is Perfect “. The Best Way To Get A Woman’S Heart Is To Give Her Yours. Since You've Been Around I Smile A Lot More Than I Use To. The Way To Love Anything Is To Realize That It May Be Lost. A Hundred Hearts Would Be Too Few To Carry All My Love For You. Forget The Butterflies, I Feel The Whole Zoo When I Am With You. Chemistry Is You Touching My Mind And It Setting My Body On Fire. Someone Asked Me, How’S Life? I Just Smiled & Replied, She’S Fine. I’M In My Bed, You’Re In Your Bed. One Of Us Is In The Wrong Place. It Is Better To Have Loved And Lost Than Never To Have Loved At All. Sometimes I Look At You And Wonder How You Can Be So Cute All The Time. My Love Doesn’T Sleep, It Keeps On Looking For You With Its Eyes Open. If A Hug Tell How Much I Love You, I Would Hold You In My Arms Forever. Love Is When You Look Into Someone's Eye And See Everything You Ever Need. Wanna Hug Yuh Soo Tight…That Even Air Couldn’T Fill The Space Between Us. Let Me Love You If Not For The Rest Of Your Life Then For The Rest Of Mine. Everyone Says U Fall In Love Only Ones, But I Fall Daily With The Same Person. Being Someone’S First Love May Be Great But To Be Their Last Is Beyond Perfect. You Can Push Them Away, But People Who Really Love You Will Always Choose To Stay. Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, Love Never Crossed My Mind Until The Day I Met You. It Takes Millions of People To Make The World, But Mine Is Completed With 1 And Its You. Happiness Is Falling Asleep Next To You And Waking Up Thinking I’M Still In My Dreams. Falling In Love With You Is The Second Best Thing In The World. Finding You Is The First. I Don’T Want To Lose This Feeling. If I Could Choose A Place To Die, It Would Be In Your Arms. When I Dream, I Dream Of You. Maybe One Day, Dreams Will Come True. Because I Really Love You. Love Is Like A Rubber Band Held At Both Ends By Two People When One Leaves It Hurts The Other. Falling In Love Is Only Half Of I Want, Staying In Love With You For Till Forever Is The Other. I Wanna Be The One Your “Ex” Will Hate, Your Mom Dad Will Love, And The One You’Ll Never Forget. True Romance Isn’T Romeo And Juliet Who Died Together But Grandma And Grandpa Who Grew Old Together. Love Is Of All Passions The Strongest, For It Attacks Simultaneously The Head, The Heart, And The Senses. Meeting You Was Fate, Becoming Your Friend Was A Choice, But Falling In Love With You Was Beyond My Control. It Takes Two Special People, To Make A Loving Pair. There’S A Joy Just Being Around You, A Feeling I Love To Share. Everyone Says You Only Fall In Love Once, But That’S Not True. Every Time I Hear Your Voice I Fall In Love All Over Again. The Best Feeling Is When You Look At The Falling In Love Is Only Half Of I Want, Staying In Love With You For Till Forever Is The Other. I Smile Like An Idiot When I’M Talking To You. Doesn’T Matter If It’S A Person Or Through Text Or Anything Else. I Just Smile Because It’S You.
Alone Whatsapp Status
When Everything Is Lonely I Can Be My Best Friend. The Soul That Sees Beauty May Sometimes Walk Alone. It's Far Better To Be Alone Than To Be In Bad Company. I'd Rather Be Happy And Alone Than With You And Miserable. I’M So Lonely That I Don’T Want To Be With Myself Anymore. Hello Darkness ! My Old Friend. I Have To Talk With You Again. Always Stand For What Is Right, Even If You Are Standing Alone. I’M Honestly Probably Going To Be Alone For The Rest Of My Life. They Judge Me Before That Even Know Me. That’S Why I’M Better Off Alone. Don’T Afraid Of Being Outnumbered. Eagles Fly Alone. Pigeons Flock Together. Never Depends On Others Too Much Because Someday You Will Have To Walk Alone. I Forgive But Don’T Forget, Because I Never Want To Be Hurt The Same Way Twice. When You Feel Like You’Re Fighting Alone In Life That’S When You Should Be Fighting The Hardest ! All Relationships Have One Law. Never Make The One You love Feel Alone, Especially When You’Re There. Sometimes I Feel Like I Just Want To Be Alone! But What I Actually Want, Is Someone To Just Hold Me And Tell Me Everything Will Be Ok!
Friendship Whatsapp Status
The Best Mirror Is An Old Friend. What Is A Best Friend? A Single Soul In Two Bodies. Friendship Doubles Your Joy And Divides Your Sorrow. A Single Rose Can Be My Garden… A Single Friend, My World. Never Let Your Friends Feel Lonely… Disturb Them All The Time. A Friend Is Someone Who Knows All About You And Still Loves You. Only A True Best Friend Can Protect You From Your Immortal Enemies. A Good Friend Is Hard To Find, Hard To Lose, And Impossible To Forget Best Friend Is Someone Who Loves You When You Forget To Love Yourself. I Would Rather Walk With A Friend In The Dark, Than Alone In The Light. A True Friend Is That One Which Takes Your Hand But Touches Your Heart. Good Friends Are Hard To Find, Difficult To Leave, Impossible To Forget. Friends Are Like Stars, They Come And Go, But The Ones That Stay Are The Ones That Glow Good Friends Will Share The Umbrella. Best Friends Will Steal It And Yell: Run Loser Run! The Best Way To Stay Close To Someone Is By Being Just Friend. Nothing More And Nothing Less A Friend Is Someone Who Can See The Truth And Pain In You Even When You Are Fooling Everyone Else Nice Friendship Is Like The Breathing Air, You Will Never See It But You Will Always Feel Its Presence. Don’T Walk Behind Me; I May Not Lead. Don’T Walk In Front Of Me; I May Not Follow. Just Walk Beside Me And Be My Friend. Best Friends Are There For You Even If You Refuse To Talk To Them. Because They Know, Deep Down, The Silence Is Killing You. Friendship Is So Weird… You Just Pick A Human You’Ve Met And You’Re Like “Yup I Like This One” And You Just Do Stuff With Them. To Be A Best Friend Doesn’T Take Much, A Shoulder, An Ear, Some Understanding, And Not Even Have To Say A Word To Make You Laugh Or Smile If You Feel Hollow, Let Me Be The One, Who Fills You Up With Love. Let Me Free The Butterflies Within. Just Open Your Heart, And Let Me In. Friendship… Is Not Something You Learn In School. But If You Haven’T Learned The Meaning Of Friendship, You Really Haven’T Learned Anything. You Can Always Tell Who Your True Friends Are. They Are The Ones Who Will Be There Without You Asking Them To Be. All The Others Are Part-Time Friends.
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whatsappstatus2017 · 7 years
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Whatsapp Status {*2017 FRESH*} Coolest Whatsapp Status Quotes!
Whatsapp Status  
Cool Whatsapp Status
1. I look at people sometimes and think... Really??? That’s the sperm that won.
2. When I die, I want my grave to offer free Wifi so that people visit more often.
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3. I love food and sleep. If I give you a bit of food or text you all night, that means something.
4. Diets are hard because I get hungry.
5. We live in the era of smartphones and stupid peoples.
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6. Just saw the most smartest person when I was in front of the mirror.
7. God is really creative, I mean...just look at m!!!
8. I'm not lazy, I'm just on my energy saving mode.
9. Please be patient even a toilet can handle only one ass hole at a time.
10. Whenever i have a problem, I just sing, Then i realize my voice is worse than my problem.
- Cool Whatsapp Status: Best 100,000+ Whatsapp Status Quotes!
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11. When I’m on my deathbed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the.
12. I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice.
13. “F#%K It.” – my final thought before making most decisions.
14. If I delete your number, you’re basically deleted from my life.
15. Some people need to open their small minds instead of their big mouths.
16. Whenever I think of quit smoking, I need a cigarette to think. 17. Relation of friendship is greater than the relation of blood. 18. When I miss you I re-read our old conversations and smile like an idiot. 19. When I miss you it seems every song I listen to is about you. 20. My silence/smile is just another word for my pain. - Cool Whatsapp Status: Best 100,000+ Whatsapp Status Quotes! Advertisements 21. Sometimes It’s better to be alone…No one can hurt you. 22. The most painful goodbye’s are those which were never said and never explained. 23. Sometimes one middle finger isn’t enough to let someone know how you feel. That’s why you have two hands. 24. Sometimes I’m not angry, I’m hurt and there’s a big difference. 25. My silence doesn’t mean that I quit… It simply means that I don’t want to argue with people who just don’t want to understand!
26. Don’t be so happy, I don’t really forgive people, I just pretend like it’s okay and wait for my turn to destroy them. 27. If you want to make your dreams come true, The first thing you have to do is wake up. 28. I don't have dirty mind, I have sexy imagination. 29. The greatest advantage of speaking the truth is that you don't have to remember what you said. 30. I'm not failed... my success is just postponed.
Latest Cool Status Messages for Whatsapp 31. Everyday is a second chance. 32. If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door. 33. Do not give up, the beginning is always the hardest. 34. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. 35. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Advertisements 36. You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else. 37. Life is like riding a bicycle to keep your balance, you must keep moving. 38. You're already a successful personal. The things we take for granted someone else is praying for. 39. Dreams is not what you see in sleep, Is the thing which doesn't let you sleep. 40. I will win, not immediately but definitely.
Cool Status for Whatsapp for Boys 51. I love to walk in fog, because nobody knows I'm smoking. 52. I'm not drunk, I'm just chemically off-balanced. 53. Oh, so you wanna argue, bring it. I got my CAPS LOCK ON. 54. I'm so poor that I can't pay attention in class. 55. Warning!!! I know KARATE and few other oriental words.
56. I'm not virgin, my life fucks me every day. 57. I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people. 58. Save water drink beer. 59. Virginity is not dignity, It is just lack of opportunity. 60. Not all men are fools, some stay bachelor.
Attitude Cool Whatsapp Messages 61. Phones are better than girlfriends, at least we can switch off. 62. I love my job only when I'm on vacation 63. Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up. 64. Behind every successful man is a surprised woman. 65. In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker. Mostly collectors are including Hindi Status in every collection due to content unavailability that spoil the collection and user experience. However, we have always picked English status and WhatsApp status in English language. Therefore, now you can directly come and choose WhatsApp status as per your wish and desire :) Check Out Now: Whatsapp Status in English (in English with Pure Grammar) 66. How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? they both have an iPhone. 67. Some people call me Mike, you can call me tonight. 68. Sometimes you succeed and other times you learn. 69. I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle... He's dreaming too. 70. Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal my status
  Cool Status for Whatsapp for Girls 71. My "last seen at" was just to check your "last seen at". 72. Not always "Available".. try your Luck.. 73. Hey there Whatsapp is using me. 74. Life is Short – Chat Fast! 75. Time is precious, waste it wisely. I wish every desire and wish of you get completed asap. However, we have specially submitted one of the best collection to inspire you to reach our goals in your life.
76. I'm not single, I'm just romantically challenged. 77. Trust in God, But lock your car. 78. AwesoME ends with ME and Ugly starts with You. 79. Try to be a rainbow in someone's cloud. 80. It hurts when you have someone in your heart but not in your arms. Damn Cool Whatsapp Status Quotes 81. Please don’t forget to smile :) 82. Get up every morning, imagine a future then make it happen. 83. Everyone is beautiful in their own way because God makes no mistakes. 84. You're right. I'm NOT perfect. But I'm unique! 85. Always remember that you’re unique. Just like everyone else.
86. Don’t compare yourself with anyone in this world… if you do so, you are insulting yourself... 87. Create your own visual style… let it be unique for yourself and yet identifiable for others. 88. Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going. 89. It is almost impossible to smile on the outside without feeling better on the inside. 90. No matter how strong of a person you are, there’s always someone who can make you weak
Daily New Cool Whatsapp Status Updates 91. It’s funny how people say they miss you, but don’t even make an effort to see you. 92. Life is like Facebook. People will like your problems & comment on them but no one’s gonna solve them because everyone is busy in updating their. 93. Attitude is like underwear Don’t show it just wore it… 94. I Am Not Special , I Am Just Limited Edition :P 95. I got less but I got best!
96. Get as rude as possible and don’t let anyone tell you how to live. 97. The only reason I am fat is because a tiny body couldn’t store all this personality. 98. Adjustment with right people is always better than Argument with wrong people. A meaningful silence is always better than meaningless words. 99. If a hug tells you how much I love you, I would hold you in my arms forever. 100. Silence is the most powerful scream. 101. Some poeple are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day. 102. I changed my password everywhere to 'incorrect'. That way when I forget it, it always reminds me, 'Your password is incorrect.' 103. Don't know where your kids are in the house? Turn off the internet and they'll show up quickly. 104. A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have. 105. When you wake up at 6 in the morning, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's already 6:45. When you're at work and it's 2:30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and it's 2:31. 105. My goal this weekend is to move... just enough so people don't think I'm dead. 106. I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning. 107. Have some patience, I'm screwing things up as fast as possible. 108. It's a good thing I brought my library card because I'm totally checking you out. 109. You're like a sharpie - super fine. 110. I know I'm a handful, but that's why you have two hands. 111. I always carry a knife in my purse, just in case we're having cake. 112. Forget the butterflies, I feel the entire zoo in my stomach when I'm with you. 113. Bought a talking parrot today and taught him to say "Help, I've been turned into a parrot." 114. I made a huge to do list for today. I just can't figure out who's going to do it. 115. At night, I can't fall asleep. In the morning, I can't get up. 116. I wonder how police on bikes arrest people. "Alright, get in the basket." 117. Guys are like stars, there are millions of them, but only one makes your dreams come true. Love starts with a hug, grows with a kiss, and ends with a tear. 118. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why it's called the present. Life isn't about how many breaths you take but about the moments that take your breathe away. 119. This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 30 dog, seconds dog! … Now read without the word dog. 120. My ex girlfriend’s status said suicidal and standing on the edge. So I poked her. 121. Got a problem with me? Solve it. Think i’m trippin? Tie my shoes. Can’t stand me? Sit back down. Can’t face me? Turn around. 122. Single is not a status. It is a word that best describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others. 123. Facebook should have a “no one cares” button. 114. If your relationship status says, “It’s complicated” then you should stop kidding yourself and change it to “Single” 115. I’d really post your name here every minute if facebook keeps on asking me what’s on my mind 116. Delete me , Poke me, Like me, Limit me ..The choice is yours.. Welcome to facebook, where no one is really your friend. =P 117. I’d rather check my Facebook than face my check book. 118. I’m wondering why logging onto Face book has become part of the everyday routine?… Do I really have nothing better to do! 119. Your intelligence is my common sense. 220. That awkward moment when you change your Facebook status to ‘single’ and your ex likes it. 221. Weather forecast for tonight: Dark with a chance of tomorrow in the morning. 222. I intend to live forever, or die trying. 223. Being nice to people you don’t like is not being two faced, it is called growing up. 224. The kids next door challenged me to a water balloon fight. I’m just updating my status while waiting for the water to boil. 225. Sometimes I wish life was like facebook, you can delete anyone off your page and go back and delete everything you have said and done! 226. …did a lot of nothing yesterday, but I didn’t finish, so I’m going to do it again today! 227. Trust me I am a liar. 228. Got a new job with the local hostage negotiators and tried to phone in sick but they talked me out of it. 229. Girl: Why do you constantly keep posting my name as your Facebook status every 2 minutes? Boy: Facebook keeps asking me what’s on my mind? And honestly, it’s always you. 230. I’ve officially been diagnosed with OFCD (Obsessive facebook checking disorder). I have also been told that I am beyond cure. Please pray for me. 231. Roses are red, Facebook is blue, No mutual friends, Who the hell are you? 232. Facebook is the only place you can write whatever you feel on a wall. Grrrr Facebook won’t stop asking what’s on my mind even if I tell it, it keeps on asking. 233. I’ve gone out to find myself. If I should arrive before I get back, please ask me to wait. 234. I Know Wat You’re Doing Right Now… You’re Reading On My Wall, Right ! 235. Facebook is like prison, you write on walls and get poked bu people you don’t know. 236. Call me anorexic, call me fat. I can put on or I can lose that. Call me annoying, call me dumb. Excuse me miss; but I’m having fun. Call me a flirt, call me fake. That’s just me, so give it a break. Call me weird, a nerd & a geek. Call me what you want, I’m just unique. 237. Facebook should have an ‘Enemy List’ 238. Adding you as my friend doesn’t mean I like you, I did it just to increase my friend list. 239. You can't please everyone, you're not a Nutella jar. 240. Hmmm this text message is a little too harsh, I'll add LOL at the end. 241. Seeing a spider in my room isn't scary. It's scary when it disappears. 242. I'm not running away from hard work, I'm too lazy to run. 243. I miss the days when you could just push someone in the swimming pool without worrying about their cell phone. 244. Some people have "aha" moments, I just have "Oh Seriously?" moments. 245. Dear humans, in case you forgot, I used to be your Internet. Sincerely, The Library. 246. Don't worry, the spider is smaller than you. "Yeah. So is a grenade." 247. They say "don't try this at home" so I'm coming over to your house to try it. 248. For you, I would swim across the ocean. LOL, just kidding, there are sharks in there. 249. Sure, I do marathons. On Netflix. 250. Your eyes water when you yawn because you miss your bed and it makes you sad. 251. Always be positive. *Trips down the stairs* Whew, I got down those stairs fast. 252. Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it. 253. Dear automatic flushing toilet... I appreciate the enthusiasm, but I wasn't done yet. 254. If you keep annoying me, I'll give your phone number to all the kids and tell them it's Santa's hotline. 255. Facebook should have “So What” button! 256. As Facebook has a “Poke” button, it should have a “Kick” button as well. 257. My greatest fear is that I will accidentally use the status update as the search bar. 258. I don’t like to commit myself about heaven and hell – you see, I have friends in both places. 259. Whoever said facebook was a good idea, “Let me share my dull life with the rest of the planet.” ? 260. No matter what anyone says, my cooking is excellent, even the smoke alarm seems to be cheering me on! 261. Facebook is the red carpet for pretty girls who have no talent. 262. …It’s Not That I Hate You… But Let’s Put It This Way If You Were On Fire And I Had A Gallon Of Water I’d Drink It. 263. He who went to facebook and left myspace is wise. 264. Am quitting face book to face my books. 265. Facebook should add a “dislike button” some updates are just too senseless. 266. Facebook is where hypocrisy, falseness, double standards, rumors and depression meet up for coffee. 267. I’d say we should have a “You Bore me” button on Facebook! 268. Single doesn’t always mean lonely and relationship doesn’t always mean happy. 269. Paper cut: A tree's final moment of revenge. 270. People like me great. People don’t like me great. As long as I like myself that all that matters. 271. Thank you to every person who has ever told me I can’t. You are just another reason I will. 272. I made my Facebook name "Benefits," so when you add me now it says "you're friends with benefits." 273. Marriage is like a walk in the park... Jurrasic Park. 274. How does a train eat? Chew, Chew... 275. I'd walk through fire for my best friend. Well, not fire because that's dangerous. But a super humid room... well not too humid, because you know... my hair. 276. What did the traffic light say to the other traffic light? Don't look, I'm changing. 277. You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new cleaning sponge at the kitchen sink. 278. Yes of course I am athletic... I surf the Internet every day. 279. I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition. 280. Dear Diamond, we all know who is really a girl's best friend. Sincerely yours, Chocolate Cake. 281. Of course I talk to myself... sometimes I need expert advice. 282. If Monday had a face... I would punch it. 283. I drank so much Vodka last night that this morning I woke up with a Russian accent. 284. I wasn't mad, but now that you asked me 7 times if I'm mad.. yes, I'm mad! 285. I enjoy taking long romantic walks, to the fridge. 286. I really should do something with my life... maybe tomorrow. 287. I have reached a point in life where I feel it is no longer necessary to try & impress anyone. If they like me the way I am, good & if they don’t, it’s their loss. 288. You can’t compare me to the next girl. Because there is no competition. I’m one of a kind, and that’s real. 289. An attitude is an inward thought that wiggles its way out. 290. I’m not cranky. I just have a violent reaction to stupid people. 291. I might not be someone’s first choice, but I am a great choice. I don’t pretend to be someone I’m not, because I’m good at being me. I might not be proud of some of the things I’ve done in the past, but I’m proud of who I am today. I may not be perfect, but I don’t need to be. I am the way God made me. Take me as I am or watch me as I walk away. 292. There can be no positive result through negative attitude. Think positive. Live positive. 293. A bad attitude can literally block love, blessings and destiny from finding you. Don’t be the reason you don’t succeed. 294. Like me for who I am and not for who you want me to be. Take it or leave it. That simple. 295. What others think of me is none of my business. 296. Love me or hate me I’m still gonna shine. 297. Keep your face towards the sunshine, you will never see the shadow. 298. I’m only responsible for what I say not for what you understand… 299. Some days I wish I had the wisdom of a 90 year old, the body of a 20 year old, and the energy of a 3 year old. 300. I know that Einstein's theory of relativity is correct because every weekend goes by twice as fast as normal. 301. Smiles are contagious... be a carrier. 302. Every weekend I do what I love most, absolutely nothing! 303. Relax, it's the weekend... just don't blink or it will be all over. 304. To thrive in life you need three bones. A wish bone, a back bone, and a funny bone. 305. It's so hot outside that I went to buy vegetables, and by the time I got home they turned into soup already. 306. Please cancel my subscription to your issues. 307. I tried looking at the bright side of life, but it hurt my eyes. 308. I'm a Nillionaire. I have little to no money! 309. Square box, round pizza, triangle slices, now that's confusing. 310. Never judge a book by it's movie. 311. Maybe if we tell people the brain is an app, they'll start using it. 312. Exercise? I thought you said extra fries! 313. I hate mosquitoes. I mean, I know I am delicious, but I don't give out free samples. 314. Isn't it funny how red white and blue represent freedom, unless they're flashing behind you? 315. So you’re a player? Nice to meet you, I’m the coach. 316. If taking a shower is bad for the environment, I know I’m doing the world a big favor!;) 317. For those of you complaining you can’t sleep, LOG OFF FACEBOOK! It’s a proven fact that it’s impossible to sleep while facebooking. 318. David loves animals. Especially the sweet and sour chicken. 319. Liking your own status is like high fiving yourself in the face. 320. I wish that I could put my status to what I am really thinking. 321. I should change my name to No One, that way when I request you as a friend it will say “No One wants to be your friend”. 322. I should change my name to No One, that way when I request you as a friend it will say “No One wants to be your friend”. 323. The person who has ruined my life is one and only Mark Zuckerberg :D 324. Who needs TV we got Facebook DRAMA.
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325. Go away don’t talk to me right now cause it’s my break time and I’m on FB mode… 326. Has implemented a healthy routine, affecting immediately . Very basic and it’s free – Nap Time!! 327. If the world really ends in 2012, I wasted my whole life in school. 328. Dear Facebook: They are not “Suggested friends.” They’re people I’m intentionally trying to avoid. 329. I don’t care what you think of me! Unless you think I’m awesome – in which case, you’re right! Carry on… 330. Don’t run after him who tries to avoid you..! 331. I just want to be left alone, is it hard. I don’t wanna talk because it ain’t going anywhere, let me be. I’ll be fine because I’m stronger than you think I am, I will not be defeated. 332. Treat me like a queen and I’ll treat you like my king. Treat me like a game. And I’ll show you how it’s played. 333. I’m just a mirror for you, You are good, I’m best, You are bad, I’m worst. 334. Don’t get my personality and my attitude twisted, because my personality is me, and my attitude depends on you! 335. Life: Besides gravity, nothing keeps me down. 336. I don’t follow others, I only follow my orders because I am my own boss. 337. Whatever life gives you, even if it hurts, just be strong & act like you’re okay. Strong walls shake, but never collapse. 338. My attitude is based on the way you treat me. 339. I let my haters be my motivators. 340. Attitude is not what you learn from school, it is part of your nature from within. 
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chaotictommy · 2 years
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Johnny teaching Daniel to drive: Okay, now, you’re driving and Tommy and Dutch walk into the road, what do you hit, Daniel?
Daniel: Dutch, obviously, why would I want to hit Tommy?
Jimmy and Bobby: *From the backseat* we could think of a few reasons...
Johnny: *getting annoyed* The Brakes, Danielle, you hit the brakes.
Daniel teaching Johnny to drive: Okay, now, You’re driving, and Kreese, Mr. Miyagi, and Terry Silver walk into the road, what do you hit?
Johnny: Kreese obviously, why would I want to hit Mr. Miyagi and that other guy? I don’t even know him...
Bobby: *Cringing and facepalming* The brakes, Johnny, you hit the brakes...
Daniel: *involuntarily flinching* That’s Terry Silver, Kreese’s business partner, and he — he ruined my life...
Tommy: * looking murderous * Okay, we should definitely run him over.
Bobby: *rolling his eyes* Tommy, that’s murder...
Dutch: Yeah, but like justified murder right?
Jimmy: *shrugging* I mean, he has a point, Bobby, but okay...
Johnny: *passing through a red light* Yeah, he does have a point...
Daniel: ... Johnny? Why are you speeding up?
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