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#incorrect loki quotes
lokilookslikekrampus · 2 days ago
The Avengers: *going to stop loki* Loki you need to- Y/n why are you on Loki's lap
Y/n: I have no fucking idea on how I got here and I think I got drugged but thats a question for next time *passes out*
Loki: I wasn't joking when I said they're mine, okay let's do this very quickly so I can take them to bed
Avengers: you know you can't just keep y/n
Loki: what do you mean CAN'T I already have them
Thor: You can't just claim a mortal brother
Loki: not your brother and yes, yes I can
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lazy-cat-corner · 2 days ago
Casey: [scrambles in Loki’s closet]
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bisexual-chupacabra · 5 months ago
Mobius, reading about Loki betraying Odin: Look at this! You played him like a fiddle!
Loki: oh no, Mobius, fiddles are actually difficult to play
Loki: I played that bastard like the cheap kazoo he was.
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citrineasguardian · 8 months ago
"my child is fine"
Your child literally reads smut with a straight face while eating breakfast like it's the morning paper.
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zemosimp05 · 4 months ago
What about Loki being clingy and reader is happy because he started opening up
Marry me
Loki x Y/N | Pure Fluff (T-T)
An: Again I changed the prompt lil bit but reblogs/feedback/likes are greatly appreciated & highly encouraged!
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“Daaarrrrliiiiinggggg…..” you yelped when a heavy figure literally crashed over your body on the couch disrupting your peaceful reading session.
“Ow ow ow….Lokiii….god you’re heavy….” You yelled trying to push him away but he snuggled you more tightly in his arms. You looked up before you to Thor who was standing there with a sorry face.
“Y/N….” Loki giggled softly nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck, hugging you, nibbling your neck.
“Is he drunk?” You asked bit worriedly to Thor.
“Sorry …” He nodded at you before leaving the room.
“I missed youuuu….my looooveee…”Loki’s voice was slurring making you chuckled this time. It’s been a while you have witnessed him this drunk.
“Loki…You saw me few hours ago…” you chuckled softly, stroking his hair and he hummed in response resting his head on your chest. He was heavy so you tried to push him aside little bit to adjust your position but he huffed annoyedly.
“NO…cuddle me…” he mumbled. You smiled looking down at him. Usually you’re the clingy one always sticking with him like a Koala. But seeing him like this was rare.
“My head hurts…”
“Why did you drink so much?” You asked.
“I was sad…” he mumbled.
“Aww… why…?”
“See… we are together for a long time right?” He asked lifting his head up to look at you. You nodded in response.
“And I never really did anything nice for you…” he confessed sadly making you confuse.
“Loki wha-”
“Shhh…don’t interrupt your god…” he said placing a finger on your lips.
“You love me right?” He asked.
“Ahh…I said don’t interrupt me…” he said glaring at you and you rolled your eyes.
“So…I feel so bad that I never even asked you to marry me…” he said thinking. Your eyes widened, a amused smile plastered on your lips.
“Loki…you ” but he placed his hands on your mouth.
“Shh…you talk way too much…As I was saying…I know I’m gonna be an awful husband…” he said laying back over you again.
“Umm hmm…” you hummed in approval, playing with his hair.
“You know I’m so bad around kids…” he scoffed.
“That you are…” you said again stroking his hair.
“Don’t interrupt me Y/N… I know I will just annoy and tease you all the time…cause problems…”
“You do that…”
“Sorry… please continue…”
“I will get unnecessarily jealous and possessive over youuuuu…” he lifted his head up again looking at you. You’re grinning at him cheekily. He was looking so cute like this, cheeks bit flustered, voice slurring little bit.
“Don’t smile…I’m trying to be serious here…” he said bit angrily and you immediately make a serious face trying hard not to laugh.
“ I will probably forget our anniversaries even…buuuut…..” he slurred.
“Buuuut?” You asked smiling again.
“Will you still Marry me Y/N?” He asked finally with so much hope. That’s when you chuckled at him. God how much you love this idiot.
“Y/N…I’m not joking….I might be little full..little bit..” he said emphasising with his finger little bit and you nodded.
“But I genuinely love you…” he said.
“I love you too…” you giggled placing a soft kiss on his lips.
“So will you marry me?”
“But I’m married already…sorry…” you chuckled showing him your wedding ring. Loki got up in disbelief.
“How can you do this to me…” he mumbled softly not believing your words, then looking at the ring.
“Omg Loki…I am married to you…” you laughed at your husband’s drunken state. You’re so happy inside as he proposed you again.
“We…we are…married already…?” He asked astonished.
“Yes next month gonna be our one year anniversary…” you smiled at him.
“ Omg I’m an awful husband …” he yelled this time hiding his face in his hands in embarrassment. How could he forget about marrying you, the love of his life.
“Aww…come here…” you giggled pulling him again in your arms , cuddling him as close as possible.
Here’s the Zemo version 🤗
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clandestineloki · 3 months ago
pov: you're not used to a healthy relationship
loki: darling, i need your help.
y/n: yeah, sure, what is it?
loki: how do i block someone?
y/n: huh?
loki: scratch that, how do i block these...
loki: [pointing to three consecutive names in his DMs] ...these girls right here? they're still making advances even if i've already told them that i'm in a relationship.
y/n: uhhhh... you press those three dots there and-
loki: no, better yet, i'll report them. that'll teach them not to mess with a king who already has a queen.
y/n: ...
loki: dar-darling, are you crying?
y/n, full-on sobbing: marry me.
loki: WHAT? i mean, of course, in the near future, hopefully, if you'd like, but that doesn't answer my q-
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kaainaat · 7 months ago
Loki: what are we now? We used to be amazing, glamorous mega-villains. And now?
Bucky: we have depth and character.
Loki: [look of disgust]
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lazy-cat-corner · 3 months ago
Loki: Pledge your loyalty to me and I’ll give you what you need.
Citizen: Universal healthcare?
Loki: You don’t have that?
Citizen: Meal services for low income households?
Loki: [gasp]
Citizen: Free dental and vision care?
Loki: Isn’t that covered by healthcare?
Citizen: Increase the minumum wage every year?
Loki: They don’t already do that?
Citizen: Fund reservations?
Loki: Eye-
Peter: Free college textbooks?
Loki trying not to cry: Oh, you poor things!
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Kid Loki: I spy with my little eye, something that starts with an ‘s’.
Classic Loki: Salt? A snake?
Slyvie: Sand?
Loki and Mobius: [staring at each other from a distance]
Slyvie: Sexual tension?
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always-detty · 4 months ago
Other Mobius: So you’re telling me we’re husbands in this other timeline?
Loki: 100%.
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silvery-luna · 5 months ago
Mobius: ARE YOU-
Loki: fucking
Loki: fucking
Mobius: IDIOT!
B-15: …What was that?
Loki: Renslayer banned Mobius from swearing, so I’m helping him out.
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incorrecttmarvell · 5 months ago
mobius: you can’t just create another timeline
loki: not to worry, i have a permit
mobius: … this just says “i do what i want”
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mythgenderedloki · 29 days ago
Mobius: Loki, why is there blood all over the TVA corridors?
Loki: um it's not blood, it's paint.
Mobius: why on earth would the TVA paint the floors red?
Loki: it's called colour theory, look it up.
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