Peter, on facetime: babe… pls dont be mad but… I did something
Harley, internally: this can’t be good
Harley, externally: *sighs* I wont be mad. What did you do?
Peter, sheepishly: I, uh… may or may not have bought a chicken
Harley, thinking he means a rotisserie chicken or some shit: oh, that’s all? That’s fine. I’m totally down for chicken for dinner.
Peter: no, I mean, like… an actual chicken
Harley: you mean, like… a live chicken?
Peter: … yeah…
Harley: … you’re joking
Peter: *holds the chicken up to the camera* his name is Greg
Harley: … Peter. Babe.
Harley: we live in an apartment in New York.
Harley: where the FUCK is he gonna live?
Peter:… I didn’t think that far in advance