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#incorrect marvel texts
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*ok, but what is Jake's stragle?*
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incorrectquotesmcu · 6 months
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Kate: Y/N, you were pretty drunk last night. You came downstairs and said you were dressed to impress Natasha.
Y/N: What was I wearing?
Kate: Nothing.
Y/N: Makes sense.
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bruciemilf · 1 year
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Billy: I don't want to be adopted by anyone from the League. Batman asked and I had to buy him an ice cream cause I felt bad for saying no.
Freddy: Ha, at least no one tried anymore, right? Eugene and I have a betting pool, so please tell me they hate you
Billy: Haha. I mean, Wonder Woman kinda seems like she wants to? She pretty much tackled me into a hug and made me regret drinking coffee-
Freddy: Backtrack. Backtrack. Wonder Woman. Wants to adopt you.
Billy: I mean, yeah, but of course I said no-
Freddy: WONDER WOMAN. WANTS TO ADOPT US.
Billy: I don't see how this relates to you but-
Freddy, writing in the Shazam Fam GC: everybody buckle up new mom just dropped
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Diana, proudly showing off pictures of her newly adopted kids: And this is my beloved Mary. My beloved Eugene. My beloved darling Darla, and my beloved Pedro, and my beloved Freddy, and my beloved Billy. They enjoy video games and snacks
Bruce, taking this as an obvious challenge, taking out the Batfamily Batalbum: This is Jason. His favorite hobby is murder
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whatsanari · 3 months
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Marvel + incorrect pictures (mostly young avengers)
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sadwetcatmk · 7 months
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incorectquoteswlw · 2 months
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mamaspidershit · 1 year
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Murderer: Any last words?
Peter: Do you think I'm cute? Be honest.
Natasha, on the comms: Peter that is the WORST way to distract them.
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ragingemini · 1 year
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Nat: Steve is back from his undercover mission.
Bucky: Pls tell me he doesn't have another terrible haircut.
Steve:
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bluesunshine21 · 3 months
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Y/n : Rules are made to be broken!
Bucky:Which is why you're wanted in thirteen countries.
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marvels-meme · 4 months
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thatsashitplan · 5 months
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lowkeyerror · 1 year
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Natasha and Wanda introduce Alien Reader to Carol Danvers
Wanda: We have someone we want you to meet?
Natasha: She's not an alien exactly but she's pretty familiar with space
Wanda: Y/n this is-
Y/n: CAROL
Carol: Y/N
Carol and Y/n squeal in unison
Natasha: You two know each other?
Carol: I think we know each other very well, wouldn't you say so cutie
Y/n blushing: Knock it off Carol, what're you even doing on Earth
Carol: I could ask you the same thing?
Wanda whispering to Natasha: I don't like this
Natasha whispering back: They're all over each other
Y/n: Nat, Wanda I know we had plans but I haven't seen Carol in literal ages and I'd really like to catch up with her
Wanda: But-
Natasha: Catch up with your space friend we'll hang out later
Y/n and Carol leave
Wanda: Why'd you say that? She's stealing our woman Natasha
Natasha: What was I supposed to say? "Sorry Y/n, Wanda and I are jealous and don't want you to hang out with the one person that actually knows anything about your home"
Wanda: I'm going to mind control Carol to get her to bring Y/n back
Natasha: Absolutely not
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incorrectquotesmcu · 3 months
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Yelena: Y/N, you were pretty drunk last night. You came downstairs and said you were dressed to impress Carol.
Y/N: What was I wearing?
Yelena: Nothing.
Y/N: Makes sense.
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bruciemilf · 2 years
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Jake: Steven made me care about stupid things.
Marc: Like what?
Jake: Friends. Humanity. My well being.
Steven, happily cooking in the kitchen with a goldfish apron on: Don't forget the morals!
Jake, sighing in despair: And... [Gags] morals.
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gay-jewish-bucky · 7 months
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Bucky: Being gay and Jewish is a constant battle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my beshert, our legs dangling as we listen to Yiddish folk music" and "Hey, let's go throw some rocks at Nazis" and I think that's very sexy of us.
Steve: If the window's open and you time it right, you can do both!
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einno-arko · 1 year
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(I wanna tag @my-secret-shame cause you inspired me to make these 😭)
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