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#incorrect mcu quotes
manhattanminute2 · 2 days ago
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Y/N: Are you mad?
Natasha: No.
Y/N: So sharpening your knives at 3 in the morning is just a hobby?
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titaniaerza18 · 23 hours ago
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Natasha: You two are like drugs
Wanda: You can't live without us?
Y/n: We're addicting?
Natasha: You're both wildly expensive, I love you despite common sense, and the will to kick you to the curb lessens the longer you're with me
Wanda: Thanks...
Y/n: Love you too!
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underoooos · 16 hours ago
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Peter : Did it hurt? When I told you to Google it and I was right?
Tony :
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musenilla · a day ago
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Had inspiration from other artist styles and I just had to draw her out 😭💕
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kurosakiichigoat · a day ago
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Kate: What is your darkest desire?
Yelena: I wanna stare at someone from across the street and then disappear when a bus passes.
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mamaspidershit · a day ago
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Peter: Onion rings are vegetable donuts.
Natasha, used to Peter being Peter: Sure...
Peter: Your stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed.
Natasha: Okay?
Peter: Lasagna is spaghetti flavored cake.
Natasha:
Peter: Lobsters are mermaid scorpio-
Natasha: Jesus, that one is a little-
Clint, interested: No, no, Peter, keep going.
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ir0npvrker · 2 days ago
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bucky: i'm plenty generous. what about that time i gave blood?
sam: whose blood?
bucky: some guy’s
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mona6787 · a day ago
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Tony: You're right.
Everyone: ....
Peter: That's... That's an unusual phrase for you. Did you just learn it?
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marvel-lous-jack · 2 days ago
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Peter: *texting* Mr Stark I have a splinter
Tony: *texting* Why are you telling me this?
Peter: Its pretty big
Tony: So pull it out!
Peter: But I dont wanna
Peter: and it huuurts reeeaaaal baaad Mr Stark!
Tony: Okay. Come her and let me take a look at it
*peter walks in the lab wearing his spider suit, wobbling a little and slurring*
Peter: Hey Misser Starrrk!
Tony: Oh, hey kid- WHAT THE FUCK!?
Peter: See! I tOld youuu it was biig!
Tony: THATS A FUCKING POLE! IN YOUR CHEST!
Peter: *looks down* oh yeah *passes out*
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unluckyineverything · 2 days ago
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Kate: Whatcha doin?
Yelena, stops the blender: I am making smoothie…
Kate: Oooh, yum… Can I have some?
Yelena: Yes… I hear song today about how milkshakes bring all boys to the yard, and I did NOT want that…
Kate: …
Yelena, gesturing at Kate: So I make smoothie instead, and look…
Yelena, smirking: Mission successful…
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druig-knight-mcu · a day ago
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Marvel characters as Twitter quotes part 3
Sam: I hate flying insects man, you can fly FOR FREE. You could fly to any holiday destination of your choice but here you are in my face.
Bucky: All I ask is that you get to know me on a deep, intimate level while I resist and obstruct your every attempt to do so.
Stephen: Proud to announce that I am making a bad decision but I’m not y’all what it is so you can’t stop me.
Wanda: Raising awareness about mental health! Mine is very, very bad. Thank you for listening.
Steven grant: Bro I am straight up not livin la vida loca right now.
Rhodey: Sorry for commenting “CURSED IMAGE” under the photo of your baby.
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scentedcandleibex · 6 hours ago
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Layla: Why do you guys like being out in the rain so much?
Steven: I like splashing and the rain is just so much fun!
Marc: I’m trying to get hit by lighting.
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bishovabaddies · 4 hours ago
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*yelena picking up an expired granola bar*
kate: wait yelena no that's—
yelena: what is it now kate bishop i am hungr—
yelena spitting it out: oh it's really dry
kate: ...
kate: that's what she said
yelena, smirking: that's not what you said to me last night kate bishop
peter clearing his throat: guys your comms are still on
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1neverendingstories1 · 5 months ago
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⚠️SPIDER-MAN: NO WAY HOME SPOILERS⚠️
Peter: wth how’d you catch that brick
Matt:
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angelofthenight · 8 days ago
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You: *on the phone* Wong? I need your help! I-
Wong: is the Sanctum on fire?
You: …no?
Wong: then it’s not an emergency *hangs up*
Wanda: well? what did he say? what do we do about the portal to hell in the living room?
You: apparently it’s not an emergency
Stephen: *being strangled by a demon* HOW THE FUCK IS THIS NOT AN EMERGENCY??
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incorrectbuckoarchive · 8 months ago
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mamaspidershit · 2 days ago
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Peter: Adulting is hard.
Peter: How do I quit?
Natasha: Time travel.
Clint: Die.
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ir0npvrker · a day ago
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rhodey: do you wanna talk about your trauma?
tony: trauma? you mean the reason i’m so fucking hilarious?
rhodey:
rhodey: no
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mischievous-thunder · 10 months ago
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marvel-lous-jack · a day ago
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Peter: Mr Stark I think I've been stabbed!
Tony: What!? Who stabbed you?
Peter: A.J.Smith
Tony: How the fuck do you actually know who stabbed you?
Peter: *pulls knife out of stomach* He has his initials engraved in it!
Tony: Oh mY gOd! Don't pull it out!
Peter: Oh sorry! I'll just put it back
Tony: *on the verge of a panic attack* Don't put it back!
Peter: ... can I keep the knife?
Tony: NO! YOU CANNOT KEEP THE KNIFE!
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