#incorrect ncis quotes

[eideticstark]

Imagine y/n is Gibbs’ significant other and you take Gibbs out to KBBQ or hot pot for the first time. I feel like Gibbs’ reaction would be something along the lines of the this:

Gibbs: Y/n what the hell is this?

Y/n: *giggling* Whattt? You like to cook steak over a fire, how is this any different?

Gibbs: Yeah steak. Not whatever the hell this Fruit Roll-Up beef is.

#ncis #incorrect ncis #incorrect ncis quotes #gibbs x reader #leroy jethro gibbs #ncis imagine #ncis fandom #when I was eating hot pot this was all I was thinking about #jethro gibbs x reader #jethro gibbs

[ratboycrutchie]

DiNozzo: If McGee and I were both drowning, who would you save?

Ziva: You morons can't even swim.

McGee: Just answer the question

Ziva: my time and effort

#tony dinozzo #anthony dinozzo #ziva david #timothy mcgee #ncis #Ncis incorrect quotes #incorrect ncis #incorrect ncis quotes

[shadow-coolness]

*the NCIS crew is standing around a broken coffee machine*

Gibbs: So. Who broke it? I’m not mad. I just want to know.

Abby: I did. I broke it…

Gibbs: No. No, you didn’t. Nick?

Nick: Don’t look at me. Look at Tony.

Tony: What?! I didn’t break it.

Nick: Huh. That’s weird. How did you even know it was broken?

Tony: Because it’s sitting right in front of us and it’s broken!

Nick: Suspicious.

Tony: No, it’s not!

Mcgee:If it matters, probably not… but Kate was the last one to use it.

Kate: Liar! I don’t even drink that crap!

Mcgee: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Kate I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Mcgee!

Abby: Alright let’s not fight. I broke it, let me pay for it, Gibbs.

Gibbs: No. Who broke it?

…

Mcgee: [whispering] Gibbs, Ziva's been awfully quiet…

Ziva:Really?!

Mcgee: Yeah, really!

*arguing ensues*

Gibbs: I broke it. I burned my hand and knocked it over. I predict ten minutes from now, they’ll be at each other’s throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little quiet around here.

#incorrect quotations #incorrect quotes #ncis #incorrect ncis quotes

[tragic-shadows]

Gibbs, driving Y/N and DiNozzo: So how was your day?

Y/N: We almost got surprise adopted!

Gibbs: What?

DiNozzo: We almost got kidnapped.

Gibbs: Oh, okay.

Gibbs: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!

#incorrect ncis quotes #incorrect quotes #ncis #Leroy Jethro Gibbs #y/n #reader insert #Tony DiNozzo #i could totally see it happening #also im not dead

[queenquinzel715]

I know you said to give you time so I understand this may take a while. Could get a Gibbs x y/n where there is an undercover op where two people (one military) have to be a married couple but the killer is using sent in marriage certificates to pick there victims meaning they have to actually be legally married. Y/n is a "married to the job" kinda person she was engaged once but got cheated on then never looked back She automatically volunteers with "not like I'm ever gonna need a real marriage certificate". Gibbs ends up going for it with the with "maybe this marriage will work out". During the mission they get really close . At the end the director presents them with divorce papers leading to them in his basement somthing along the lines that "nobody said we have to sign".

Interesting 💚 I like it

Is this 18+ please feel free to message me 😀

This is up!!

#ncis #ncis fandom #ncis gibbs #ncis x reader #ncis smut #ncisedit #incorrect ncis quotes #x reader #x reader smut #fandom #reader x oc #reader #romance #fluff #smut

[wambsroy]

Gibbs: ten years ago i married my best friend.

Gibbs: my wife’s still very angry about it but me & tobias were drunk we thought it was funny

Jenny: *sighs deeply*

#ncis #jibbs #humor #leroy jethro gibbs #jenny shepard #tobias fornell #ncis crack #married jibbs bc i love them #actually canon #source: twitter #abby sciuto #tiva #incorrect quotes #incorrect ncis quotes

[tumbleweed-palmer]

Jimmy: "Why can't God give me a break? Maybe he hates me."

Tony: "Don't be ridiculous, God doesn't hate you."

Jimmy: "Thank you."

Tony: "You aren't interesting enough...I'd say he'd be ambivalent towards you at best"

Jimmy: "....."

Tony: "If he even exists."

Jimmy" "Wait...what?"

#incorrect ncis quotes #og derry girls quote

[drarreckyninja]

Tim, to Tony: Do you want a cheese straw to celebrate life? Tony: Tim: Tony: Um...sure?

#incorrect quotes #ncis #incorrect ncis quotes #tim x tony #mcgee x dinozzo #mcnozzo

[sepiawizarddetective]

*Head slap*

DiNozzo: Sorry Gibbs, I was thinking...

McGee: I wish I could stop doing that!

#incorrect ncis quotes #ncis #tony dinozzo #tim mcgee #incorrect quote generator

[zibbs-forever]

„Ziva, you drive!“

"Boss, do you want us all to die?" Tony asked, whereupon he harvested two head nuts, one each from Ziva and Gibbs, as well as dark looks that could have killed.

#navy cis fanart #navy cis #ncis #ncis ziva #ncis tiva #ncis tony #ncis gibbs #incorrect quotes #incorrect ncis quotes #incorrect navy cis quotes #anthony x ziva #ziva x gibbs #ziva david #ziva dinozzo #tony and ziva #ziva and tony #tony dinozzo #anthony dinozzo #l.j. gibbs #leroy jethro gibbs #jethro gibbs

[the-tiva-og]

Palmer: Which way did Dr. Mallard go?

Tony: Well, based on the direction of the wind, the broken sticks in the corner, and the slight disturbance in the dirt, I'd guess he went left.

Palmer: You could really figure it out from that?

Tony: No, you idiot, I watched him leave.

#incorrect ncis quotes #source: tumblr #Jimmy Palmer #Tony DiNozzo

[astrid-delacour]

Things my class has said as NCIS quotes

Ziva: Is there a north and south California

Tony: Who the fuck is playing yankee doo da? 

*Dora theme song playing*

Cue the team laughing

Gibbs: There is a grieving widow next door I don’t want to hear all this laughing

Tony: In our defence someone was playing the dora theme song

Gibbs: *glaring*

Tony (to McGee): You know how in movies the man kisses the woman's hand? Well i'm gonna lick yours

McGee: falls out of his chair in his haste to get away

Tony: do you wanna know what we did?

Ziva: no, I already heard the screaming

Tony: oh that was just McGee yelling “I did not fu*k a 16 year old"

Tony: it looks like *slaps cheeks* 

Ziva: The scream? 

Tony: yes! the scream *falls out of chairs*

Tony: OHH I did a 360 d*ck spin shot! He has no more balls and no more life

#NCIS #ziva david #incorrect ncis quotes #tim mcgee #tony dinozzo #abby sciuto #leroy jethro gibbs

[scottishaccentsareawesome]

(After a mission they were not supposed to go on, to help Maverick, the Daggers all need to give depositions - but they still need to find Maverick, as do the 86'ers) Rooster:...You know what, I can also get Hangman to come back here to help us look. He's on his way to be questioned by Special Prosecutor Rogers. I mean, we're all scheduled to give our depositions today, but I could just say that it's an emergency. Slider: No, the last thing you want to do is alert them to something being up...As a matter of fact, the longer Lieutenant Seresin can keep Rogers occupied, the better. You think he can stall them? (The Daggers all go silent and stare at each other) Rooster(trying to hold back a smile):...That won't be a problem. Phoenix(sighs): Unleash the beast. Rooster(getting out his phone): Unleashing...

#incorrect quotes #top gun maverick #daggers & 86'ers #uncle slider #mavdad #hangaroo #hangster #sereshaw #original: ncis los angeles #jake seresin #hangman seresin #bradley bradshaw #rooster bradshaw #natasha trace #phoenix trace #ron kerner #slider kerner

[shadow-coolness]

Torres: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]

Bishop: What's that?

Torres: Remorse code.

Bishop: I'm even angrier now.

#incorrect quotations #incorrect quotes #incorrect ncis quotes #ncis

[tragic-shadows]

gibbs: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.

y/n: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.

gibbs: I was going to wake you up to look at the stars...

#gibbs #Leroy Jethro Gibbs #leroy jethro gibbs x reader #incorrect ncis quotes #reader insert

[thestarwarslesbian]

Ducky: *Walks into autopsy and puts a human skull on the table where Gibbs, McGee, Ziva and DiNozzo are sitting* Gibbs: Uhhh... Duck? Ducky: What? Ziva: The skull? Ducky: Oh yeah, that's Mother's. DiNozzo: *lurches back* McGee: OH MY GOD!!! Ducky: No, it's not Mother, it belonged to Mother. She'd put it out every Christmas to remind us that even though it's the holidays, people still die, I've have it up every year. Mr Palmmer always seemed to enjoys it when he comes over at christmas. Ducky: Plus, you can put candy in it! Jimmy: *Enters* Hey guys... Aww, the Christmas candy skull! You remembered!

#ncis incorrect quotes #ncis #ncis ducky #donald mallard #jimmy palmer #leroy jethro gibbs #ziva david #tony dinozzo #tim mcgee