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#incorrect ned leeds

Peter deciding to be annoying and sing the same song for the 5th time that morning: into the UNKNOWWWN-

MJ: Oh my god- I will THROW YOU INTO THE UNKNOWN IF YOU DONT SHUT THE FUCK UP

Ned, holding back laughter:

Peter:

Tony who was about to walk in with snacks:

Tony: *walks away*

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Kinda stupid but Marvel teen characters as stupid things my friends have said because it’s 6am and I am terrified for the future of our country.

Shuri: I have succeeded in the second phase of my quest to fill my mother’s home with trash bird memorabilia.

Ned: Oh my god Peter you need to stop telling people they look like testosterone.

Ned: Hello MJ, how many homophobic teachers have you made cry today?

MJ: One, and its not even 9 am!

Shuri and Peter: *Having a very intense fake argument pretending to be Karen’s*

Harley: *Sarcastically* ahh gotta love the British. God save the Queen. Sherlock. Crumpets. Ruthless invasion.

MJ: I swear to god I will boil your teeth and then feed you your eyebrows.

MJ: Moonwater is not a fucking essential oil!

Harley: I’m sorry.

Harley: Do you want to speak to the manager?

Harley: It’s 2020, all Gods have abandoned us but Baby Yoda.

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Peter: Have you guys done your daily sacrifice for the day??

MJ: “daily sacrifice for the day”

Ned: it’s Peter, don’t question it.

MJ: That’s not what I mean.

MJ: Isn’t that the definition of daily tho.

Peter: Shh, answer my question, shithead.

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Ned: I would sewer slide with Kermit.

MJ: We love Kermit.

Peter: I would let him murder me.

MJ: I thought Mr. Stark was your idol.

Peter: No, he’s my dad.

Peter: Kermit is my kink.

Ned: I-

Ned: I will dress up as Kermit.

Peter: Nah, you’re not the real deal.

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Ned: If you are falling, you can use your webs to catch yourself right?

Peter, suspicious: Yeah….

Ned : So in theory, you could safely do a backflip of off the Empire State building, right?

Peter, eyes lighting up : YEAH!!

Tony, bursting in: HELL NO!!!!

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Ned: Population growth is just a formal mathematical way of saying “how fast can people fuck?” 
MJ: Actually you’re missing an important part. Really it’s a formal mathematical way of saying “how fast can people fuck and also die?”
Ned: In that case, I guess it’s more like “how much faster are people fucking than they are dying?” 
MJ: Exactly. Fuck to death ratio. 
Ned: Right! 
Peter: *not looking up from his textbook* Rate of smash and pass. 

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MJ: okay, who did it?

Peter: what do you mean?

MJ: y/n’s sitting there crying

Ned: oh they-

Peter: Ned, shhh

Ned: we need to tell her

MJ: tell me what?

Peter: they got into MIT

MJ: and?

Peter: shoot, we didn’t tell you did we *looks at Ned*

Ned: uhh y/n’s dad is Tony

MJ: so, this could be a good thing and a bad thing?

Peter: ahaha, yeah

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