Crowley: Being gay is a constant battle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my lover, our legs tangling as we listen to the birds" and "Hey, let's go throw rocks at fascists" and I think that's very beautiful.
Halt: If the windows open and you time it right, you can do both.
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(Halt and Crowley cuddling at a campsite)
Halt: Is Abelard eating my hair?
Crowley: Abelard's eating your hair, yes
Halt: (swats Abelards snout away and pulls up his hood)
Abelard: (bites the hood and pulls it down, goes back to eating Halts hair)
Halt: Oh. My. God!
Crowley: Dude at this point I think you should let him
Halt: I am not just letting my horse eat my hair!
Abelard: Cromnch
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Ranger To-Do List.
Drink coffee
Evoke fear, mayhem, madness, drink coffee, chores, disturb barons, spook kings, drink coffee, stop and start wars/international crisis, drink coffee
Drink coffee, never sleep, repeat.
I've got it basically correct, right?
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Will: traps a wasp under a cup
Gilan: appears and sets down 2 more cups
Will: No Gilan…
Gilan: starts to shuffle them
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Crowley: More expresso less depresso :D
Halt: I'm still depressed but now I'm fast
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Halt: “Person of Interest” is almost too flattering
Halt: Like, if the guards were to pound on my door and go, "A man has been murdered in your building and you are a person of interest," I'd be like, "Moi? Oh, do go on."
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the RA fandom anytime Halt, Crowley, and Pauline are together:
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this was in my drafts but I’ve completely forgotten what I was gonna write for the first part lmfao
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Horace and Will about to implement a risky plan
Will: However this turns out I am mostly grateful to have know you
Horace: Likewise Will, life won't be the same without you, you idiot
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Person: are you a guy or a girl?
Gilan: do you want to ask and find out? Or do you want to kiss and see how you feel afterwards
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Horace: Which way did Will go?
Halt: Well, based on the direction of the wind, the broken sticks in the corner, and the slight disturbance in the dirt, I'd guess they went left.
Horace: You could really figure it out from that?
Halt: No, you idiot, Will sent me a text. See?
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Alyss: Hey, about that love letter you sent me-
Will: *blushes* What are your thoughts?
Alyss: The fourth sentence-
Will: Yeah, that’s where I got really emotional and I-
Alyss: It’s “you’re” not “your”.
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Gilan: "Dude you look so gay right now"
Halt: "I am actively kissing a man"
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Will: Hey Halt! Where are you going?
Halt: When I die? Hell, probably. Most likely.
*shrugs*
Halt: But right now? A meeting.
Halt: Which is kind of the same thing, but worse.
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Jenny, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.
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Crowley: Halt!! We have a very serious marriage problem
Halt: Bur we aren’t married?
Crowley: Exactly. That problem needs to be fixed NOW.
Halt:…
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