percy: wasn't icarly that guy that girlbossed too close to the sun because he was down bad for apollo?
annabeth: ICARUS?
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Monster: Identify yourself!
Percy, panicked: Percy Jackson, Greek, 16, leo sun and bisexual sir!
Monster: You're bi? That's so valid.
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ten-year-old Nico about Percy and gang: I just want to be included.
Nico, after being included: what the fuck—
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Someone: so, Percy was your leader in more than one battle.
Camp Half Blood: yeah.
Someone: he must be a great commander and strategist if you followed him through all this.
CHB: I mean, yeah, but also in most battles he'd just yell "FIGHT" and then he would fight.
Someone: so why are you letting him be in charge?
CHB: well, he has Annabeth. She is an amazing commander and strategist.
CHB, muttering: and he is HOT
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Artemis: I didn’t think you were gonna adopt another kid!!!
Apollo, holding Frank: You should always assume I’m gonna adopt another kid.
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Percy: Hey, babe, remember how I had to go to the pharmacy to pick up my ADHD meds?
Jason: Yes?
Percy: Well, it turns out they're all out for the next five days.
Jason: Fuck.
Percy: It's gonna be a fun week!
Jason: I'm going to Nico's house.
Percy: Nuh-uh. Through sickness and health, motherfucker.
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Nico: That's ridiculous. Will doesn't have a crush on me!
Percy: Yes he does.
Annabeth: Yes he does.
Will: Yes I do.
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leo: jason do u ever look at urself at think “damn that’s hot shit there”
jason: ……
jason: no????
leo: oh well that’s what i think when i look at you
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Thalia: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming
Reyna: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak
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percy: what goes up but never comes down?
grover: the amount of stress you bring me
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annabeth: my name is annabeth 😐
percy: are you stalking me annabeth?? 😡
annabeth: *thinks about it*
annabeth: yes 😑
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A god: I will not stand here and be insulted!
Percy:
Percy: Then stand over there, or sit. I don't give a fuck
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