#incorrect slytherin quotes
Lucius: Trust your mother's opinion on things.
Draco: Normally I would, but she chose to marry you.
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Slytherin: If you could be in any house besides your own, which would you want to be in?
Hufflepuff: Because then I'd be with you all the time!
Slytherin, crying: Okay
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Lucissa looking for Draco in the battle like ..
Narcissa : Have you seen our son !?
Lucius : Tall , silver blond hair , grey eyes
Narcissa : and clearly gay but we haven't had the talk
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Draco: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, its "intelligent" and "really cool".
Draco: But when I do it, I'm "petty" and "need to let it go".
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Theo: Ah yes, baguettes, the snakes of bread. We'll take two of your freshest yeasty eels, good sir.
Draco: ignore him
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the fact that if someone asked you to recite Shakespeare " O fuck " would be a perfectly acceptable response
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I Mint to do That
Hufflepuff: I keep my antidepressants in my altoids container
Ravenclaw: You know that's actually a really good idea
Slytherin: How do you tell them apart?
Hufflepuff: I don't.
Slytherin: That is a great idea. Your either happy or have fresh breath.
Hufflepuff: Or happy with fresh breath
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Blaise: Do flat earthers think the earth moves through space like a giant frisbee?
Theo: This is my new religion.
Draco: God made earth a giant frisbee and tossed it into the abyss.
Pansy: ONE. NORMAL. CONVERSATION. PLEASE.
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ravenclaw: music is just wiggling air
slytherin: don’t do this. Don’t do this to me today.
ravenclaw: and colour is just wiggling light. Thank you for coming to my tedtalk.
gryffindor: artists and musicians are just magicians of the wiggle.
hufflepuff: an artists best quality: their wiggles.
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hogwarts house quotes #5
Ravenclaw: How petty can you get?
Slytherin: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.
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Hermione: Undress me with your words, darling.
Draco: There's a spider in your bra.
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Ted: You know what strength is? Forgiving a person who wasn't even sorry.
Andromeda: Not to be dramatic, but I would literally rather die.
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Slytherin: Ah, yes, I appreciate all my friends
Slytherin: Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and-
Slytherin: *looks at smudged writing on hand*
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Slytherin : Don’t throw my past in my face I know what the fuck I did
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Harry: What's something you guys are better than Draco at?
Theo: Mario Kart.
Pansy: Yeah! video games.
Blaise: Emotional vulnerability.
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Blaise: Why the hell would you give Theo a knife?!
Draco: He said he felt unsafe
Blaise: I feel unsafe!
Draco, reaching inside his pocket: You want a knife?
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Correct me if I'm wrong...
Slytherin: *drinking tea and scrolling through their phone with an open textbook nearby*
Gryffindor: Um arent you supposed to be studying?
Slytherin: Um arent you supposed to not be a disappointment?
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Harry: has anyone ever told you that they love you?
Draco: do my parents count?
Draco: then no.
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gryffindor: why can’t dinasaurs clap?
ravenclaw: because their hands are too short—
slytherin: because they’re dead.
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Snape: *bolts upright* Oh shit I’m late for class.
Snape: oh wait I’m 21 *lays back down*.
Snape: *shoots back up* I’M THE FUCKING TEACHER!
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