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#incorrect stevetony
wrongmultifandoms · 11 hours ago
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Tony: [almost sleeping]
Little Morgan: Dad
Tony: [pretending to sleep]
Little Morgan: Oh he’s asleep
Little Morgan: I think Captain America likes you, hehe
Tony: Does he?
Little Morgan: No, but what happens if I eat a butterfly? Does it fly inside me?
19 notes · View notes
girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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Tony: You know, I'm starting to regret showing you how that blender works.
Steve, drinking toast: Why do you say that?
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girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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Tony: Steve and I have the kind of easy chemistry where we finish each other's-
Steve: Sentences.
Tony: Don't interrupt me.
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girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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Tony: If you had to choose between Steve and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose?
Bucky: That depends, how much money are we taking about?
Steve: Bucky!
Tony: 63 cents.
Bucky: I'll take the money.
Steve: BUCKY!!!
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girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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Tony, panicking: I lost my super soldiers. Has anyone seen Bucky and Steve?
Sam rolls his eyes, stands to his feet, and yells: TONY STARK IS NOT A HERO.
Bucky: WHO THE FUCK SAID THAT?!?
Steve: IM ABOUT TO STAR-SPANGLED BEAT YOU THE FUCK UP.
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girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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Tony: *does anything*
Steve, drunk on mead: THATS MY BOYFRIEND BITCHES
Tony: husband
Steve: evEN BETTER
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girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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Tony, talking to Natasha: Steve and Bucky pissed me off this morning when they woke me up. So I told them I can’t wait to see what they have planned for our special day tomorrow.
Natasha: What’s special about tomorrow?
Tony: Nothing. But there is something special about watching the color leave their faces as the panic takes over.
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girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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Steve: The only kink I have is people caring about my feelings and what I have to say.
Tony: Unrealistic. Stick to bondage and choking like the rest of us.
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girlon-aplane · 4 days ago
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*Pulls curtain back while Tony is showering*
Tony: *screams*
Steve: Are we - Stop screaming, it’s just me - are we out of Cheetos?
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naferty · 5 days ago
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Tony: I love you
Steve: I love you, too
Tony: My snickerdoodle
Steve: My sweetheart
Tony: My stud muffin
Steve: My sunshine
Tony: My love
Steve: My bees knees
Tony: My boo
Steve: My fella
Bucky:
Sam:
Bucky: Love you, bitch
Sam: Love you, too, asshole
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Tony: So it turns out a squirrel would need to fall about 4800 miles in order to die because that would give it time to starve to death because they can survive terminal velocity.
Steve: Tony, I am begging you it is 2:30 in the morning.
364 notes · View notes