Loki: I want to save the world
Renslayer: I want to meet my master.
Sylvie: I want to keep my new life.
Mobius: I want to keep the only life I’ve known stable.
Miss Minutes: I want to date my boss.
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Loki, to Mobius: How's the sexiest person here?
Mobius, flipping casually through a magazine: I don't know. How are they?
Loki, flustered: I-
Sylvie, legs kicked up on a desk across the room and grinning smugly: I'm doing great, thanks!
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Loki: WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?! THROWING YOURSELF INTO DANGER?!
Mobius: OH, YOURE ONE TO TALK!
O.B.: What are they doing?
Sylvie: just give them a minute.
~A few minutes later~
Loki: babe I love you and I’m glad you’re safe
Mobius: I’m sorry for throwing myself into danger
O.B.: …what the hell just happened
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Loki Introducing Sylvie To His Siblings...
Y/N: It's so nice to meet you! I've always wanted a sister!
Thor: Really? Why?
Y/N: ...I love you too, Thor.
Loki: Really? Why?
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Things Loki Characters Absolutely Have Said
O.B: What’s your favorite color?
Mobius: Stop asking stupid questions. Ask me something logical and mature.
O.B: How many moles of sodium bicarbonate are needed to neutralize 0.8ml of sulfuric acid at STP?
Mobius: My favorite color is green.
-
Sylvie: My aesthetic is "would be suspected of witchcraft by small town citizens."
-
Loki: I have locked Casey in a cage designed by their own art. Oh, he has been well and truly hoist by his own petard.
Timely: Could you put it another way? I didn’t understand a word of that.
Loki: I’m blackmailing him.
Timely: Oh, happy days.
-
Mobius: If Sylvie and I were drowning, who would you save?
Loki: You two can’t swim?
Mobius: It’s a hypothetical question, Loki! Who would you save?
Loki: My time and effort.
(for legal reasons this is a joke)
-
Mobius: If I were a drink, I'd be Cherry Vanilla Coke. If you were a drink, what would you be?
Sylvie: Bleach.
Loki: Sewage.
Mobius: ...Please calm down, edgelords.
-
Sylvie: Kill him.
Loki: This is the kind of quality advice I look for.
-
O.B: Thanks for not telling the TVA what happened.
B-15, dumbfounded: I wouldn’t even know where to begin trying to explain this.
-
Loki: We both look very handsome tonight.
Mobius: You know, if you'd just said that I looked handsome, I would have said, "So do you."
Loki: I couldn't take that chance.
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Mobius: This food is too hot… I cant eat it.
Loki: You’re very hot, and I still eat you.
Everyone at the table: silence
Sylvie: YOU GUYS ARE DISGUSTING!
Thor: One dinner… I just want ONE DINNER!
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Loki, talking about Mobius: WHAT THE FUCK I WAS ARGUING WITH HIM AND I SAID “OOH YOU WANNA KISS ME SO BAD” AND GUESS WHAT? HE DID. HE KISSED ME. WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO I DO?!
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