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#incorrect tokyo ghoul quote
vampireernie · 8 months
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*kaneki and hide skipping stones on a lake together*
Kaneki: Wow its such a beautiful day today isn't it Hide?
Hide (whispering as he throws): Take that you fucking lake
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thatdeadmikey · 1 year
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Furuta: Ok, I wasn't properly listening when this happened so you're gonna have to take this with a grain of sa-
Koori: bitch I'm gonna have to see a doctor because of the fuckton of salt I have to take with everything you say
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kyanitedragon · 4 months
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Hide: You ever get so tired you start seeing spiders?
Kaneki: Me after I have a near-death experience and start seeing The Clown
Hide: The who?
Kaneki: Oh this is not a safe space suddenly
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faefaye · 9 months
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Amon: Akira just gave me a "get better soon" card.
Shinohara: That's sweet of her.
Amon: No, I'm not sick… she just thinks I could do better.
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strangesthirdeye · 1 month
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Ghoul Y/n uhuk
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John: *opens the door* Greg?
Greg: John *nods in greeting*
John: what are you doing here?
Greg: I believe Sherlock sneaked out some of the eyeballs from the lab according to Molly. So I need that back to the lab for the sake of Molly.
John: *stunned* Sherlock!
Sherlock: *confused* what?
John: did you take the eyeballs from the lab?
Sherlock: John, I haven't done an experiment in 3 months, let alone steal eyeballs from the lab
John: then who else wants to steal?
Y/n: *descends the stairs from the top while holding a jar of eyeballs in both hands *
John: Y/n! You're stole the eyeballs
Y/n: *startled and look at John* it's not my fault that I'm hungry.
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sleepinghellokitty · 4 months
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Juzo: My 11 year ban on yahoo expires today! Shinohara: ..I'm sorry, 11 YEARS?!
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imgabysama · 10 months
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post TG-re:
Akira: Amon, I think you broke my clavicle yesterday
Amon: Haha, you know I don't fall for that anymore, Akira...
Akira: *pulls her shirt and shows a bruise* see?
Amon: Holy s-
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maplequeen94 · 25 days
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“’𝐹𝑢𝑐𝑘 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑆𝑡𝑢𝑝𝑖𝑑 𝐵𝑎𝑘𝑎 𝑙𝑖𝑓𝑒’ 𝑜𝑟 𝑤ℎ𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝐹𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑧 𝐾𝑎𝑓𝑘𝑎 𝑠𝑎𝑖𝑑.“
- 𝐊𝐞𝐧 𝐊𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐤𝐢 𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 (𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐲)
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whateveranimex · 2 years
Conversation
Rize: Are you having another depressive episode?
Kaneki: A depressive episode?
Kaneki: I'm having a depressive series and we're on season nine.
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Yomo: I hate you.
Uta: Well, according to this picture I drew of us holding hands, that is untrue.
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zer0n0tf0und · 1 year
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Kaneki, talking to Hide on the phone: Did you preheat the oven like I told you to? Hide: You bet! Kaneki: At what temperature? Hide 535. Kaneki: That's the clock. Hide: Kaneki: Hide: 536.
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faefaye · 2 years
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It's been a while, have a bunch of one-line incorrect quotes
(known sources are mentioned, others are unknown)
Akira: If attitude could kill, I would be a weapon of mass destruction.
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(source: Peter Cook)
Kaneki: I've learnt from my mistakes, and I'm sure I could repeat them exactly.
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Juuzou: I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead.
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Touka: Note to self, it is illegal to stab people for being stupid.
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Hide: I'm not afraid of death! What's it going to do, kill me?
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(source: Charles M Schulz)
Kaneki: Sometimes, I lie awake at night and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?'
Kaneki: Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.'
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aromantickaneki · 1 year
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Touka: A bullet may have your name on it, but a fireball is addressed "to whom it may concern"
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