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Miami: God, give me patience. Roger: I think you mean 'give me strength'. Miami: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.
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desbratty · 16 days ago
Draco: :wipes his face: What is this salty discharge?
Hermione: Oh, Merlin. You're crying.
Draco: This is horrible.
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dianawayne · 24 days ago
diana, plucking flower petals: he loves me.
diana: he loves me not.
diana: he loves me
diana: he loves me not.
diana: :(
bruce, handing her a flower: that's not true. keep going.
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skyeknight-otp-speaks · 2 months ago
Incorrect Quotes
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Sangwoo: I like your new pants
Ali: Thank you, hyung! They were 50% off
Sangwoo: I think I would like them better 100% off
Gi-hun, crossing fingers:
Ali: I don't think stores should give away clothes for free, hyung
Sangwoo: That's not what I—
Ali: It would be bad for their business
Gi-hun, face palming:
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Peter: Okay, so would you stab your best friend in the leg for 10 million dollars? Nat: Okay, so you stab me and then we can buy a big ass mansion to live in. Y/N: Then you can stab me too. Actually, stab me twice- I can take a hit. Nat: Good thinking! This is going to be the biggest ass mansion ever! *Nat and Y/N high five*
Bonus: Tony: You guys do realise that I already pay rent for you to live in this big ass mansion, right?
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meenyminymoes-blog · 3 months ago
Y/n: What if I press the brake and gas at the same time?
Inej: The car takes a screenshot.
Kaz: For the last time, get the fuck out.
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gnfcamboy · 3 months ago
George, internally: ah, there he is, the love of my life. I'm going to confess to him and tell him how much I love him.
Dream: Hey, George !
George: You're an idiot.
Dream: Says you, idiot.
George, internally: Oh, well, I'll try again tomorrow !
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incorrect-quotesstuff · 4 months ago
Eddie: Bye Buck! Bye Chimney! Bye Hen! Bye Bobby! Bye Buck!
Hen: You said "Bye Buck" twice..
Eddie: I know. I like Buck
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Kovit: I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate or malewife our way out of it this time Matt: (cracking his knuckles) Matt: Manslaughter it is
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peralt-iagos · 3 months ago
Mac: can i have more candy daddy?
Jake: what did mummy say?
Mac: she said no
Jake: then why would i let you?
Mac: she's not the boss of you
Jake, internally: its a trap its a trap its a trap
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zarlieniel · 5 months ago
Tsukki: *putting bandages in his finger*
Y/n: this isn't my kink but I'm literally getting turned on
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dianawayne · 4 months ago
kang: loki, truth or dare?
loki: dare!
kang: i dare you to kiss your favorite person in this room.
loki: hey, mobius.
mobius: *blushes* yes, loki?
loki: get out of the fucking way, you're blocking sylvie!
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*Y/N crouched on top of the kitchen counter, while Carl is balancing on the arm of the couch* *Rick walks in* Carl: Dad, the floor is lava! Rick: Huh? Y/N: Honestly, Rick, poor effort. 0 out of 10. Watch and learn... *Glenn walks in* Y/N: Glenn, the floor is lava! Glenn: *squeals and jumps onto the coffee table* Carl: And that is how you play the game.
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meenyminymoes-blog · 3 months ago
Nikolai: Change is inedible.
Y/n: Don't you mean inevitable?
Nikolai, spitting out coins: No, I did not.
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