#infinity war fan fiction

[iheartsebstan]

So I fell down this rabbit hole on @/animarvelita on TikTok with all these AI images of Bucky!! Now I want to go back an reread all my fav fan fiction with these images in mind 😍

@jtargaryen18 ♥️

#sebastian stan #marvel #bucky barnes #avengers #winter soldier #captain america #mcu #avengers infinity war #marvelcinematicuniverse #fws #fan fiction #bucky fanfic #ai images

[rogersideup]

Nice to be kneaded

Chapter 13

Cardboard Castle

Series Masterlist

Previous part: Homecoming Next Part: Cinnamon Roll

Word count: 6,205

Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI. Mentions of medical equipment, loss, abuse, PTSD, anxiety and depression.

After a short overnight shift at the Bakery, you went home to change clothes then snuck your way into Steve's house for a surprise. Walking in always felt invigorating as if you were committing a crime, but his house key on your key ring told you and the cops otherwise.

You tiptoed up the stairs and slowly opened his bedroom door to find him sound asleep. The sight of him laying on his stomach with his arms above his head and his face squished against the pillow made you smile and your heart melt. The framed picture he had added of the two of you on his nightstand since he had been back in Greenwood also made your heart melt.

A peaceful, content Steve had to be one of your favorite sights in the world, but so was a happy Steve so you were more than okay with sitting next to him and rubbing the bare skin on his back to wake him up.

Your hand made its way from the center of his spine, up and across his shoulder blade, and onto his shoulder before giving him a firm squeeze and a kiss on his temple. He calmly stirred awake, and his furrowed eyebrows relaxed when the smell of your perfume resonated in his head.

"Good morning, Baby." You said before running your fingers through his hair.

A smile spread across his face before he threw one of his arms across your lap, and shoved his face into the side of your hip. There was a few additional moments of processing time before he lifted his head and squinted his eyes from the bright light shining into his room. "Hi" He mumbled.

You giggled at his lack of energy. "Hi"

"What time is it?" He asked, voice hoarse and raspy.

"7:15"

"Oh shit I slept in"

"That's a good thing, Honey." You leaned over to give him another kiss but on the cheek this time.

"How was work?" He mumbled, turning into his side to see you better.

"It was good, definitely nice to be back. The girls were asking about you, by the way." You grinned. "I know you've met some of them already, but I think they all want to meet you."

"Okay, let's go right now." He yawned before rubbing his face with his hand.

"No," You laughed. "Not right now."

“Why not?"

"Because I have some big plans for us today, that's why I came to wake you up." You explained.

"Big plans?!"

"Yeah, I was hoping you were free to hang out with me for the day."

"I can right now but I'm busy later" He told you, enjoying the head massage you were giving him.

"Oh yeah? What are you doing later?" You questioned with a smile.

"I have plans to take this really pretty girl on a date." He informed you.

"Oh really? Who?"

"You!" He enthused.

"Me?! I can't!" You denied.

"Why not?" He pouted.

"I have plans to take you on a date later!"

Steve's pout turned into a smile. "Well this is awkward then, isn't it."

"Well I asked you first"

"I think I asked you first" Steve challenged.

"I think you should surrender and just let me do what I have planned." You suggested.

"But I think you should let me do what I have planned. Do you see the issue here?"

"Okay, so what's the compromise?" You asked with a chuckle.

"Let's split the day, 50/50."

You narrowed your eyes at him. "Deal, but I get to go first because I'm already dressed."

"That's fair." He agreed, sitting up fully this time. You selfishly took a moment to appreciate his shirtless body, it never failed to captivate you. "What are we doing first?"

"We're going on a run." You smiled wide.

"A run?!? With me?!?" His eyebrows raised.

"I can explain." You started. "I was thinking last night about how you've spent so much time here learning all about what I like to do, but we haven't spent a lot of time doing things that you like to do. So I thought we could go on a run together, then after you can teach me how to paint something. It'll probably just be a brisk walk on the trail for you, and I'll definitely suck at painting but-"

"That's so sweet," Steve smiled unconsciously. His arms wrapped around you and smooshed your body against his. "and so thoughtful"

You laughed as he attacked your face with kisses. "I think I've gotten better at running since you left, so maybe it'll better than last time we went running."

"Even if you got worse and I have to carry you the whole time, I'm still going to have fun." Steve giggled.

"Great, you're very easy to entertain." You smiled.

"What can I say? I enjoy the simple things." Steve agreed.

You eventually got him out of bed and the two of you set off on a redo of the first five mile run along the trail. But this time, all of those lonely mental health runs from your time after the blip came in handy, and chasing after Steve like it was fun game for you as if you were a toddler that needed to be convinced, the five miles was over in no time and the smile never left your faces.

When the five miles was over he gave you a two handed high five way above his head that you had to jump to reach, and in retaliation you jumped onto his back and made him carry you over to the second part of your date which was in the grass field. It was just as beautiful as the picture Steve painted of it for you.

Thick blanket below the two of you, with water colors and paint brushes spewing about, you sat and painted with him for hours. He taught you simple techniques that increased the quality of your art tenfold. Together you painted flowers and plants, then with a timer going, you started two different paintings and swapped them every ten minutes, adding to each others art until the pieces were complete, then lastly two separate paintings that you kept a secret until you revealed them to each other when they were done.

You painted him a picture of the field so he could have his own version of the painting you loved so much, and he painted his absolute favorite art subject, which was you. The entirety of the time you had spent with him today, you swore he never stopped smiling. You wondered if his cheeks hurt, and you vowed to do this with him more often, as often as you possibly could.

One valuable lesson you both learned the hardest way possible throughout knowing each other, was that time was the most precious gift they could have. Though quantity was the goal before Steve was absolved of his crimes, both of your lives have completely changed.

Pretty quickly into his stay back in Greenwood, you both realized the weird leash your unlabeled relationship had was removed and now you were both free to explore the deeper parts of if that you could never reach before. Quantity of time was in abundance, so quality was the new goal.

Steve was very mindful of the lack of label between the two of you. He was also very worried about the new situations at hand. There was distance, actual real commitment, and the lack of an un-promised tomorrow meant that the vulnerability to really get to know each other on a deeper level than before was important to making this work. A small part of him had a huge fear that you wouldn't find all the hard parts of this new dynamic worth it anymore, and that dating him as Captain America would be way harder than the role he played before as your mysterious neighbor.

But he was fully committed to you, and he knew he was willing to move mountains and jump thousands of hurdles to make this work. He was also committed to erasing the doubts Georgia scribbled into his mind.

Steve's thoughts always moved way too fast in every single direction for his heart to keep up with, and you knew that about him. Every situation he thought through had an unrealistically amazing outcome, or his entire world would end up crashing and burning, and there was never a middle ground.

So, at this moment, you'd either end this four weeks loving him so much that he suffocated, or he'd be leaving Greenwood heartbroken and drowning in his own sorrows.

Would you open up to him? Would you never want to be his girlfriend? Would you shut him out when things got hard? Would you risk everything for a life with him like you did for your last ex? Would you tell him what actually happened between the two of you?

But when you were mindful of him and were so sweet as to go on a run and paint with him for hours on end, he couldn't help but to feel hopeful for the future. A future where you were both the priority, and there was a perfect middle ground to his big city avenging and your small town baking. The happy medium where you both lived the lives you always deserved and wanted, but again, you weren't even his girlfriend yet.

When you we're both satisfied with the amount of paintings created and we're creatively fulfilled, everything was packed up and put back into your car and the two of you made it back to Steve's place.

In attempts to wash off the remnants of paint on your arms and the five mile run off your bodies, a steamy shower was shared but not a lot of washing took place and not a lot of water was saved. But, it was still better than any shower you could've possibly taken by yourself, and you were left feeling blissfuly refreshed.

When you got out and dried off, you were brushing some product through your wet hair when Steve came up behind you and wrapped his arms around your stomach and peppered gentle kisses on your neck.

"Are you ready to hand date duties over to me now?" He questioned, also feeling blissful and happy as could be.

Leaning back against him, you set the brush down and held onto his arms, "Sure thing. What should I wear?"

"What you have on is perfect!" He enthused.

You giggled as you gazed at your bodies in the mirror. He was wearing sweatpants with no shirt on, and you were in sweatpants and a black tank top. No makeup, no bra, and your hair was wet and un-styled from the shower.

"Perfect for what? Public indecency?" You smiled.

"Nope." He popped the P. "First order of business is nap time."

"Nap time?!"

"You, pretty girl, woke up at 2 in the morning, worked until 7 am, ran five miles, painted, and I'm pretty sure what we just did in the shower accounted for another five miles. So, we're going to take a nap." He explained to you.

"But that cuts into your date time, that's not fair." You reasoned, but touched he was taking care of you.

"Cuddling is my favorite thing in the whole world, and sleeping is yours. I think this is a win win, and a perfect date activity for us" Steve giggled. "Plus, how are you going to have any energy for more fun if you don't rest for a little bit?"

"You make some very convincing points, Honey."

"Exactly!" He agreed. "Plus it's my turn to call the shots so, get your booty in my bed!"

"I'm not going to say no to that" You put your hands up in surrender.

You guys got in and snuggled up, Steve put on your favorite comfort show, and you made yourself cozy. Head on his chest, hand on his stomach, and one of your legs hiked up onto his hips. He rubbed your back and held onto your arm, leaving an occasional kiss to the top of your head.

Eventually you both fell asleep for a little while, and like two peas in a pod, you both woke up around the same time. So cozy and warm, neither of you wanted to get up and disrupt the tiny sanctuary that was your bodies fully relaxed into each other. But he was hungry so he knew you must've been starving at that point, so way more food than the two of you could manage was ordered and the cuddle fest was relocated to the couch while you ate and watched a movie.

Once he could tell your energy level was back up to normal, the real date could begin.

He grabbed your hands and pulled you up off the couch onto your own two sock covered feet. When he prompted the change of activities, once again you were concerned about your choice in outfit, but he once again reassured you that it was perfect. But it was getting a little chilly out so you both did cover up with some hoodies.

He led you to his garage door and stopped you right before he opened it, grabbing not one, not two, but three rolls of duct tape.

Steve handed one to you, and you were throughly confused. "Duct tape! Is this the part where you tie me up and kill me?"

He barked out a laugh before shaking his head. "No, nothing like that." He stepped aside and motioned for you to open the door.

You could tell he was feeling a little nervous and shy, and every time he showed he was still a bit shy around you made your heart swell. It really was the sweetest feeling knowing he cared so much that the thought of doing something for you made him nervous.

You slowly opened the door and stepped through, a big smile turned into a puppy dog pouted lip. The garage was cleared out of everything but strings of fairy lights neatly hung on the ceiling illuminating the room with a warm glow, his record player and the stand in the corner with all your favorite records that you often listened to together, and the big stack of cardboard he never got rid of.

When you fully made it inside, you looked back at him. His expression was hopeful that you actually understood what he was getting at, but he still wanted to explain.

"I've fully accepted that I won't be needing these boxes to move out of Greenwood anytime soon." He explained. "Do you remember that one night when you came up the driveway and invited me to Georgia's?"

"Of course I do" You nodded, trying not to cry over the fact he had remembered such a small and stupid comment you had made. "I was sad because I thought you looked lonely and Georgia was making me feel lonely by saying I needed to start dating again."

"And you remember what you told me I should do with all the boxes?"

"Yeah" You giggled. "I do"

"For you, my princess, we are going to make the coolest, fanciest, most regal cardboard castle to ever exist."

"You are absolutely unreal." You giggled and shook your head. "This is the cutest, most precious thing anyone has ever done for me."

"That's crazy because this is just a stack of boxes and a few rolls of duct tape." Steve shrugged, downplaying the gesture.

"No it's not." You denied. "You listened to what I said, and you kept all these boxes even though we didn't even know each other that that point. You took a chance, you thought about doing this with me, and you're keeping this place in this tiny town you have no reason to be in. This is not just tape and boxes."

"I always knew we were going to build this castle together." He explained.

You wrapped your arms around him in a big, tight hug and rocked up on your tippy toes to give him a kiss. "Thank you, I love you."

"I love you too." He grinned. "Let's get to building."

Time wasn't even a mere thought in your brains as you went at the castle in the most logical ways you could think of. The requirements were that it had to be tall enough to lay under, and it needed to stand up on its own. It turned out that both of you made a great team, you both had good ideas, and communicated them flawlessly.

When it was done, there was a very well spoken sense of pride, but the work was nowhere near done. The sun had set a long time ago, but the nap really did come in clutch as you filled the castle with blankets and pillows while Steve lit some candles far away from the cardboard, put the needle on the record, and flipped off the main light.

It was just you, Steve, twinkling lights, and the slow and quiet music spinning on the turntable. Your heart was full as the two of you settled into your creation and enjoyed the hard work it took to build it, but Steve was a little anxious over the conversation he knew he wanted to have with you that night.

But like every single time he felt anxious, you made him feel better.

In the cardboard castle, he shared stories about going to space and visiting Wakanda. You told him all about what your life was like when you lived in California. He told you what life used to be like back in the early 1900's when he worked as a paper boy to put himself through art school, and how different it was was when he woke up 66 years later.

For the first time ever, you felt comfortable enough asking him the questions you've always had since learning about him in school. You were cautious with the way you worded each one, and he appreciated your empathy, but he was happy to answer and even happier you were comfortable enough to ask in the first place.

Surprisingly enough, you had questions about his time in the ice. Why he decided to stay in the crashing plane rather than jump ship, if he remembered anything from being frozen, if it felt like he was really unconscious for 66 years or if it felt like no time had passed at all.

Then, he started asking questions about you. Your childhood, what your parents were like, what you did for fun when you lived in the sunshine state.

You told him all about the beach 10 minutes down the road from your childhood home. How the winter and fall was still pretty warm and the rain would only visit for a few weeks out of the year. He learned that California had beaches, mountains and desserts all accessible through a few hours in a car, and how that made for a very nice change of pace on long weekends.

His head filled with visuals of the flower fields you visited every spring, mountains blooming with wildflowers and poppy's if the state had gotten enough rain over the winter, strawberry picking and orange groves. Days at Disneyland, night swims under the moon in heated pools and decompressing from hard shifts at work in hot tubs under the stars.

It all sounded incredible, and it all gave him a better idea of how you were shaped into who you were as an adult.

Two trips were planned together in a two hour long conversation, one in two months for you to visit New York. He wanted you to get a proper tour of the compound this time, and he wanted to show you around the city and where he grew up in Brooklyn. The second one being California, you hadn't been back in years, and he had only been on business. It would be an equal exchange in hometown visits, he was impatiently excited for both occasions.

"Did your Mom ever used to bake?" You asked Steve, is head was in your lap while you sat up with your legs in front of you.

"Yeah, she actually did as often as she could." He reminisced. "But recipes were so different back then. During the Great Depression there wasn't much assess to things like sugar and eggs so people would make all sorts of things with what they had. Oh, and she was a nurse so she didn't really have much time."

"So you're telling me that your mom was single handedly raising you while being a nurse, and still maintaining a household in which she cooked and baked?" You questioned in amazement.

"Yeah, she did a lot." Steve confirmed. "And I was always sick, so it's not like I was the easiest, lowest maintenance kid in the world to take care of."

"She sounds like a superhero." You smiled, playing with his hair. "It must run in the family."

"She was definitely a superhero, no doubt about it." He agreed.

"What was your dad like?"

"I don't know much about him, he died when I was super young" Steve explained. "I know he was an Irish soldier, and he met my mom in the infantry in Ireland during World War I after he took a bullet. I don't think he was very nice to my mom but that was something I kind've gathered myself through context clues, she never wanted to talk about him."

"Can you blame her?" 

"Absolutely not." Steve shook his head gently. "What about your parents? What's up with them?"

"Compared to your parents mine sound so boring!" You smiled. "My dad was a cool guy. He was a photographer, and a videographer for a news station for longer than I was alive. That job got him around to cool places and cool people. Everywhere we went there was always someone around who loved my dad for a different reason."

"And he was a good Dad?" Steve asked.

"Oh, the best." You smiled. "He was at every school recital, every graduation, every milestone of my life. We hung out together all the time."

"I know he passed a few years ago, but can I ask what happened?" He questioned more cautiously this time.

Georgia's words were working their way through his mind again, he wondered if you were going to tell him that your mom had been blipped.

"Alzheimer's" You answered. "It was a fast, aggressive type. Some kinds are slow moving, people can last fifteen, twenty years after diagnosis. But my dad was diagnosed, and not even a full year later he was gone."

"I'm very sorry, that must've been hard."

"It was, but I'm glad he didn't have to suffer through it for very long. I think the longer something so degenerative has control over every function of your body, the worse it is to have to live through it." You explained. "I think losing him was a big factor of why I decided to move here. I needed somewhere new, somewhere I could go without being constantly reminded of the lack of my Dad."

"That makes sense"

"Do you feel that way about Brooklyn?"

"Brooklyn looks so different now, it might as well be a whole new place." Steve reasoned. "Very few of the buildings are the same, but the bones are still there and it's just enough to make me feel at home, but not enough to make me feel like the ghost of everything I once knew is lingering around me."

"That actually sounds really nice" You pondered.

"It is" He confirmed. "And what about your Mom?"

"My relationship with my mom has always been a little complicated." You explained. "She was a stay at home mom that didn't really understand healthy boundaries. I think she cared more about me becoming the perfect wife and mom rather than me becoming self sufficient and successful on my own. She couldn't understand why I was focusing on putting myself through business classes and culinary rather than investing more time in my ex boyfriend who also wasn't very happy in my choices. I love her, and we had our good moments, but shes of that old school mindset that a woman's only purpose in life is to serve her husband and pop out children. She wasn't very happy with me for a while when I finally got out of that relationship, and I don't think I ever found it within myself to give her forgiveness for that."

"That does sound very complicated." Steve agreed.

"She uh... she was blipped." You told him cautiously, not wanting him to feel guilty about it. "I'm glad I got to see her when she stopped by on her road trip, but even when she came to the bakery it's not like she thought it was something to be super proud of. She would much rather I be in a miserable relationship with kids than a business owner."

"I'm so sorry." He reached up and took one of your hands.

"Thank you, but it's not your fault. You don't have to be sorry." You reminded him.

Thought no part of him was happy that you lost your mom, he was happy that you shared that with him. It was a step in the right direction, and a direct he was trying his hardest to guide you towards.

He nodded in understanding. "Do you want kids?" He asked realizing he had never asked you that before.

Then, he noticed it. Your posture, facial expression, and mood dropped ever so slightly. It was as if there was an emotional reaction to that question that you had become so good at masking it was now a visceral response. "Of course I do, but I want to have kids with the intention of raising them well with all the love I possibly can, not just because I feel like I have to because I'm a woman."

Steve knew kids were a touchy subject for a lot of women, something as simple yet complex as your own relationship with your Mom could've been the reason you reacted that way. It wasn't something that passed without a second thought in that moment, but he was happy to hear that kids were something you wanted regardless.

"What about you, Stevie?" You asked, playing with his hair one handedly now. "Do you want kids."

"Mhm" He nodded. "I don't know how many though. I feel like that's something I'll just kind've know when it happens."

He looked up at you as you smiled down at him, he was perfectly content and he could tell you were too. "I feel that way too, but I definitely don't want more than three."

"Any more than three seems like cruising for constant chaos" He agreed. "You know those people that pop out like fifteen kids?! I don't know how they do it."

"Now that seems like a nightmare" You giggled. "How could anyone even afford to send that many kids through college?"

"Well I think they start by living in a cardboard castle, it's a really good chance to put some money into savings." Steve pointed out.

"Are you kidding me, Baby? Nothing about our castle is affordable or an opportunity to save money. I think this lovely estate can sell for about 1.5 million." You noted.

"In Greenwood, maybe. But in New York, I'd say at least 4.6 million."

"That's true, real estate is really dense in the city. The market is crowded." You agreed.

"Cost of living is way too high" Steve laughed.

"Okay so, in New York we can have two kids, but in Greenwood we can have three." You reasoned.

His heart skipped a beat at your statement, it took a lot to resist the urge to clutch his chest. Wanting kids was one thing, but already imagining a life in which you had kids with him was another. Now more than ever, he knew you were as committed to him as he was to you. "Smart, good thinking."

There was a slight pause in conversation, but as Steve looked up at you, he could see a question on the tip of your tongue. You opened your mouth to ask it, then chickened out and closed it again.

The hesitation made him smile before reaching up and poking your cheek. "What's up?"

You giggled that he caught onto your lack of bravery. "Have you... thought about what this is going to look like now that we don't have a time constraint?"

"Only every waking moment of every single day." He admitted honestly, making you feel comfortable in your choice to ask the tough questions.

"Have you come to any conclusions in all of that time?" You chuckled at his response.

"Yeah, lots of them." He confirmed.

"Care to share with the class?"

"Well, the biggest and most important conclusion I came to was that our time apart was miserable for me, and it definitely confirmed my suspicions that my life without you in it is no longer a viable option." He spoke, his shy disposition flooding back. "Of course, only if that's okay with you."

A gentle heat bloomed in your chest and crawled up into your cheeks, you had forgotten how it felt to be wanted. "Absolutely, that's more than okay."

"How about you? What have you...concluded?" Steve questioned, sitting up from his comfortable spot in your lap to have a more serious face to face setting.

"Pretty much the same thing. It was really sad not knowing if or when I'd ever see you again. I missed you a lot. But..." You took a moment to find the courage to express your fears.

"No. Don't say but. Buts are scary." Steve shook his head.

You laughed at his reaction and took his hand in yours once more, hoping your touch would relax his fast being heart over the inclusion of the scariest word you could've muttered. "But... I'm worried."

"About what?" He questioned, squeezing your hand for comfort.

"Real life." You stated. "You're Captain America, and as much as I sometimes forget that, I can't be as ignorant as to forget that your due diligence is states away. My business is five minutes down the road. Both of those things are as equally important to us, and I don't know how we can make sure we can still have those things while also keeping us afloat."

As far as buts go, that one wasn't too scary. "You know Hawkeye? He's an Avenger and he lives in Iowa. Ant-Man is in San Francisco, T'challa was in Wakanda, Tony in Los Angeles and New York, Thor isn't even in the same realm as us 90 percent of the time." Steve reassured you.

"But Steve," You shook your head. "Avenging aside, your home is in Brooklyn. Your heart is in Brooklyn. Sure, maybe you don't have to be in New York for your work, but what about for you? Could you ever be happy away from your home?"

"If being a fugitive has taught me anything, it's that I can plant myself anywhere I want and find happiness all around me." He reassured you. "I've put a lot of thought into this too, by the way. I know I can leave the compound, and right now more than ever I think is the best time for me to take a step back from the Avengers. We haven't given up hope that we can get everyone back, but you saw the compound, the energy is... bleak. The one thing I can't leave behind is Nat. We're kind've the only family each other have, so I came up with a solution."

"What's the solution?" You asked, enjoying the way his big hands massaged your smaller ones.

"I'm thinking that I want most of my time to be here with you in Greenwood, because this is where I'm happiest. Then if any of the Avengers need me, I can go to New York for business trips. Maybe once every few months just to check in and make sure Nat isn't losing her mind, and reassess what our plan is on the blip."

"You're sure?" You questioned again. Nothing could've stopped your brain from thinking of the time your packed up everything from the city you once knew to follow a lover here to the small town. Though you didn't regret it because Greenwood was now your home, you did know it was a big choice.

"Positive." Steve grinned. "I can't just abandon this incredible castle we've created together."

"That's true, we worked really hard on this." You agreed.

"As hard as we worked on this stunning estate, I think we've worked even harder on our relationship and it would be an absolute shame to not reap the benefits of our effort."

"I love you, Stevie." This time you squeezed his hands.

"I love you too." He grinned. "Though it feels a little stupid to ask you this now, I was wondering if you'd officially be my girlfriend?"

Though you couldn't contain the smile on your face or the heat from pooling in your cheeks, you still couldn't stop yourself from making a joke. "Oh, I'm sorry. I'm not quite sure where you got the idea that we're more than just friends?"

His hopeful face fell into a fake pout and furrowed brows. "Maybe it was forty five minutes we spent having s-"

"Ooookkkaaayyyy" You barked out a laugh, blocking out his worlds.

"-in the shower today." He lifted his hand to wag his finger around to further prove his point. "I don't know about you, but I've never done that with just a friend."

"You've never shared a nice, steamy, soapy lather with Bucky? Not even Sam?" You blinked innocently.

Steve fake gagged causing you to laugh even more. "You're crazy!" He shook his head.

"Of course I'll be your girlfriend." You finally agreed, feeling bad for keeping him on his toes. But not bad enough to kill your smile. You got up as much as you could to seal the title with a long kiss, and a big engulfing hug. "But..."

"Again with the buts!?" Steve complained.

"Only if you'll be my boyfriend." You bargained.

"Oh, no. Sorry, I'm definitely just your good pal." He denied.

"Damn." You sighed, letting him go. "Maybe next time"

As you settled back into your spot across from him, he pulled a little velvet jewelry box out of the side pocket of his sweatpants. You had a very small moment of panic as your mind ran four steps ahead of what was really happening, but Steve didn't even need to see your wide eyes before doing some situational control. "I know how this looks, but I promise it's not that." He finally looked up and you puffed out a breath alongside a giggle. "T'challa and his sister, Shuri heard me telling Bucky about you on a call a few times before Thanos came along. They wanted to help me do something nice for you since you were always kind and generous to me, so this is what we came up with."

He handed you the little velvet box, and you opened it carefully. Inside was a dainty gold necklace with a beautifully simple sunflower charm on it. "Awwww it's so beautiful!"

"I know it looks like it's gold, but it's actually made of vibrainum like my shield is so it never breaks. I think Shuri painted it somehow because you usually wear gold jewelry." Steve pointed out. "And if you gently squeeze the sunflower, watch what happens."

Your put the sunflower between your thumb and forefinger, before applying slight pressure to it. Steve stuck out his arm to you, and that's when you noticed. The inside of his watch had a sunflower etched in on the back panel, and whenever you squeezed the charm, it illuminated in a soft golden glow.

"That's incredible" You marveled, feeling so touched and quite frankly, a little unworthy of such a gift.

"I can do it too!" He grinned before pressing a tiny button on the side of his watch, causing a golden glow from your sunflower. "This way when we find ourselves apart, we can send each other a quick little glow to say hi, and you'll know I'm always thinking of you."

"This is so thoughtful, I love it so much." You basically threw yourself at him for another hug.

"I love you so much." He rebutdtaled, holding you close against him.

"Will you help me put it on?"

"Absolutely" He smiled.

You both let go and he looped it around your neck, his big hands struggled with such a tiny clasp but he got it.

"It's so beautiful. Thank you so much, Buddy." You joked since he never confirmed he would be your boyfriend.

"You're welcome, Girlfriend." He giggled, big cheeky smile.

"Pal..."

"Best friend!" He nudged your shoulder.

"Bestie for the restie..."

He laughed once more before kissing you. "Boyfriend."

"...Boyfriend." You kissed him back.

Next Part: Cinnamon Roll

Tag List: @patzammit @bemysugarbean @happinessinthebeing @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @differenttyphoonwerewolf @themotherof10 @lokislady82 @talesofadragon @spikeluv84 @xxxalicerogersxx @avid-fic-reader-05 @royalwriteroftheuniverse @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @bitchy-bi-trash @crazyunsexycool @openup-yourmind @selella @kattreffic @benedict-squirtle @magnificentsaladllama @natashassandwich @theroyalmanatee @calwitch @avengersinitiative2012 @rogersbarber @daddywattpad4945

#steve rogers #steve rogers fluff #captain america #captain america fluff #steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #chris evans #steve rogers fanfiction #mcu x reader #chris evans fluff #captain america series #captain america fan fiction #captain america x you #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers x you #nomad steve rogers #endgame #infinity war #civil war #nice to be kneaded #Rogersideup #baker reader #bakery #marvel #MCU #mcu fanfiction #marvel x reader #marvel series #marvel fanfiction #Bucky Barnes

[paper-star-ships]

Y’all ever had a crush on a character from a source you’ve never seen or is that just me

#usb.misc #it’s Loki for me rn #I do not know HOW this happened btw #I am not a marvel fan (Spider-Man is my ONLY exception to not really liking hero stuff) #I’ve seen like 1 marvel movie not counting the Spider-Man ones #when infinity war came out I let my mom and brother drag me to theaters because spider man was in it #I had NO CLUE what was going on but my skunk lay spider guy was there so I had a great time :) #anyway my life is falling apart and it feels very much like all the stuff I do to be happy use doesn’t make me happy all of the sudden #Like I’m loosing the joy ya know #So I’m gonna lean into this <3<3 #Time to watch some marvel movies I guess!!! #Then I’ll watch the Loki show somehow <3 (cough cough *puts on eyepatch* if ya know what I’m saying) #I’m just gonna get less sleep and chase the serotonin as best I can I think #Which means playing We Happy Few until the sun rises and chasing fictional crushes <3

[sarahrogersevans]

Came Back For You- Nomad Steve Rogers xreader Fan Fic

Summary: Steve came back home from Wakanda to see Y/N because he missed her and didn’t wanna be away from her any longer

Warnings: angsty and fluffy, mild swearing, not many warnings

~Steve’s POV~

I was really glad to be coming back home to see Y/N though being in Wakanda was amazing but I didn’t wanna be away from Y/N anymore, I missed waking up next to her every morning. I got to her apartment after Bucky dropped me off and he looked at me and said “are you sure coming back here is a good idea Steve? If anyone sees we’re back we’ll be arrested.” I got my bag and walked out of the quinjet and patted Bucky on the shoulder and said “don’t worry Buck just go and lay low somewhere we’ll figure this out I’ll see you later ok?” Bucky nodded and closed the door to the quinjet and I watched him fly off and went inside Y/N’s apartment building and found her apartment number and knocked on the door hoping she still lived here. I haven’t seen her in a year and I was really nervous that she might not remember me or that she would be with someone else by now.

~Y/N’s POV~

*Knock Knock Knock*

Oh, who’s that?? I wasn’t expecting anyone to come over to my place tonight, I got up from the couch and went to answer the door and I was shocked when I saw who was at the door. “Oh my god!.. Steve?! What are you doing here???” Steve smiled at me and said “Hey doll, I missed you and came back for you. It’s so good to see you Y/N you are as beautiful as I remember.” I hugged Steve and said “I missed you so much Steve, I’m so glad you’re home by the way I love your beard it looks so good on you.” Steve blushed and rubbed the back of his neck and said “oh yea? I think I look like a mess but I’m glad you like it sweetheart.” I smiled and Steve moved closer to me and said “I hope it’s ok that I wanna kiss you?” I cupped his face in my hands and said “yea of course it is Steve I miss your kisses.” Steve leaned in more and kissed me and I got pinned against the wall and Steve whispered “I worried coming here that.. you’d move on after I left and that I’d lose you but I’m glad I didn’t doll you’re my everything and I love you I never forgot about you, I missed waking up to you every morning.” I cried and hugged him not wanting to let him go. “I never moved on Steve.. I never wanted anyone else I love you, you’re the love of my life I’ll always be here I promise you ok?” Steve kissed me and said “This is why I love you Y/N, I’m never letting you go again and no matter what it takes nothing will keep me away from you I swear.” We just stood in the middle of the living room hugging like we were never apart I loved having Steve back in my life and I’m glad he felt the same.

I couldn’t get over how amazing Steve looked with his long hair and his beard, I ran my fingers through his hair and he looked into my eyes and said “what are you thinking about honey?” I smiled and said “I just really love your long hair and your beard, I love your new look, I’m glad you’re home Steve I really missed you.” Steve kissed my forehead and said “I’m never leaving again I promise doll I’m here.”

I was getting tired and Steve noticed and said “why don’t we lay down on the couch Y/N, you need the rest.” I nodded after yawning and he helped me sit down with him and I laid my head on his chest and cuddled up close to him and said “Steve.. I’m scared if I close my eyes that you’ll be gone.” Steve rubbed my back and said “don’t be scared doll I’m gonna be right here the whole time, take a nap ok? I love you.” I felt better after he pulled me closer and I closed my eyes to Steve playing with my hair gently.

Hey lovelies!!! I thought I would do a Nomad Steve fan fic 😁💙 I hope you all enjoy xx

Taglist:

@lokiandbuckysdoll

@jessybarnes

@chrisevansdaughter

@writersblog20

@delicatecoffeepeanut

@sunshine-on-my-mind

@anotherfuckingmarvelfanaccount

@vrittivsanghavi

@imyourbratzdoll

@marvelstarker-mha98

@acklesgurl-love

@nana1000night

#chris evans #fluff #fanfics #nomad steve #nomad steve fan fiction #avengers infinity war #steve rogers imagines #steve rogers fluff xreader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers one shot #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x fem!reader #steve rogers xreader #captain america #steve rogers xreader fluff #steve rogers fanfic #angst fic #steve rogers angst #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers x reader #steverogersedit #steve rogers #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers drabble #steve rogers x female reader #steve rogers fic #chris evans character #chris evans characters #steve rogers x y/n

[blackleatherjacketz]

Right Place, Right Time

Nomad Steve Rogers x Original Female Character

Summary: Nomad Steve is wandering the earth under a fake name after the devastation of Infinity War. He ends up staying in one place longer than he expected when he falls for the local doctor.

Warnings: ANGST, Pain, Medical Trauma, Emotional Trauma, Hurt/Comfort, Exhaustion, People Pleasing, Acts of Service, Grief, Loss, Mentions of The Blip, Steve literally healing your wounds, Face-Holding, Kissing, Soul-Gazing and an Indiana Jones reference!

Word Count: 2.1K

Tags: @bullet-prooflove @letsby​​

Read more MARVEL stories!

A knock on the door causes her to jump as she puts the last of the antibiotics away, making sure to align them perfectly against the antihistamines before shutting the cabinet door and locking it. She sighs and turns around in preparation to face what she hopes will be her last visitor for the day, his handsome features a pleasant surprise as he leans against the doorway.

“You’re back,” she exclaims, not expecting him to return with more supplies until tomorrow morning.

“You’re hurt,” he points out, shooting a quick glance at the bandage on her arm that’s nearly completely soaked in blood.

“It’s nothing.” She tries to brush it off, just now realizing how heavy that arm actually feels as he stares at it from across the room.

Maybe the scab had broken open under its dressing sometime throughout the day and she just hadn’t noticed. Maybe the adrenaline of running the clinic and helping others with their own wounds had masked its sensation until she finally slowed down enough to feel it. Or maybe she had gotten used to working through so much pain after everything that happened since the blip, she wouldn’t realize that she needed help until someone like him pointed it out directly.

“Let me help,” he whispers, taking a few steps forward until he’s close enough to touch her. He brushes his hand over the back of her elbow just below her bandage, his fingertips forcing the tiny hairs underneath them to stand on end as he feathers them down her forearm toward her palm. “Let me see.”

“It's fine, I just…” she trails off, his chest now at her eyeline as his fingers intertwine with hers, firmly clasping onto them.

“Let me help,” he demands, his sapphire eyes deepening in color as he squeezes her hand. “Please.”

She takes a moment to allow herself to feel the pain as the tissue surrounding her cut begins to throb, weighing it down more with each second that passes. It’s been a few hours since she’d taken her last dose of ibuprofen, the little aid it brought her now quickly beginning to dwindle away. It hurts. A lot. Without the distraction of her work to keep her mind off of how bad it actually is, she’s finally able to admit that.

“Fine,” she concedes, relaxing her stance as he steps even closer, his natural scent swimming through her senses. Maybe she can let someone else take care of things… of her, for a change.

“How many times have you stitched me up before, huh?” He starts to grab the first aid kit on the counter behind her.

“A few,” she smiles through the pain as it pulses through her limb, his grip on her fingers barely enough to counter it.

“Don’t you think it’s about time I return the favor?” His smile transforms his face into one of the very few visages of joy she’s seen in days.

She remembers the first time she met him in the dead of night, covered in dust and blood as he helped evacuate the residents of the building next to her clinic. There were dozens of families that lived there, more than half of them torn apart by the blip and even more of them devastated by the destruction that followed. Law enforcement and healthcare workers were whittled down to less than nothing in the aftermath, serving as both a blessing and a curse as the lack of help failed to save the very few left that needed it most.

The chaos that ensued was immeasurable, keeping her up at night and spreading her thinner and thinner with each passing day until he showed up. He helped her get everyone to safety, setting them up with cots to sleep on and food to hold them over until relief finally came to take them to a more secure location. It was only then that he let her treat his wounds, a few lacerations on his face and arms and a giant rod of rebar sticking out of his abdomen that he’d broken in half. She insisted that he go to a hospital if he wanted to see his next sunrise, but he pushed back and explained that he was capable of healing faster than most. It was then that she figured out who he really was, but let him believe she thought he was just a stranger who happened to be in the right place at the right time.

“Well, I don’t need any stitches, I just need it cleaned and redressed. Can you wash your hands first?” She points to the sink behind him as he starts to reach for her dressing.

“Right.” He lets go of her and does as he’s told, returning to her side with them clean and carefully hovering in front of him. He stares at her intently, his smile straightening out into a serious scowl as he slowly peels the tape away from her skin. “How did this happen?”

“Some debris fell in the storm when I was… Ah!” She winces as he rips the hair off her skin, taking his sweet time removing the rest of it before he drops the soiled dressing onto the countertop.

“Damn, that’s deep.” He whispers to himself, not quite yet a master of his own bedside manner. He rotates her arm inward to get a better view of the trauma, squinting his eyes together as if that will somehow soften the harsh edges of her flesh. He grabs the half-used bottle of saline next to the first aid kit and asks if it’s the right one before pouring it down the back of her arm. “Sorry,” he makes a face as he spills some of it onto her pants as it drips down her elbow in a stream of crimson and rusty brown. “This was today?” He looks back up at her for confirmation.

“Last night,” she breathes out of her nose as the sterile solution stings the bed of her wound and cleans her out, forcing her to instinctively grab hold of his shoulder in the process.

“It’s okay,” he reassures her, squeezing her hand in return before setting the bottle down beside her. “It's okay, you’re okay.” He smiles again, succeeding at distracting her for a brief moment from the pain. He waits for her to smile back at him before breaking eye contact, nodding in reassurance before opening the package to the dressing. “You worked all day like this?”

She nods in silence.

He was more than enamored by her work ethic as she continued to trudge through the huddled masses day after day without regard for her own health or safety. As admirable as it was, it was obvious that she was going to work herself into the ground at this rate, forgoing her own needs in the process. She didn’t have the luxury of the serum to help her recover from injury or insomnia like he did, and it was becoming more obvious by the minute. His heart beats a guilty rhythm in his chest as he covers up the tangible evidence he could have easily prevented by speaking up sooner or being more present for her. “I’m sorry, I should have been there.”

“You can’t be everywhere at once, Steve.” She lets his real name slip out between winces, her statement proving to be just as much a lesson for her as it is for him.

“I know that.” He lets go of her hand, picking up the tape and peeling it off the track with his teeth so he can keep the pressure on her arm. It isn’t until he realizes what she’s called him that he stops what he’s doing altogether. He bites his lip and takes a breath, looking at his feet as he considers keeping up his act as Grant, the man he claimed to be when they first met, but decides against it as the look on her face tells him all he needs to know.

“I’m not an idiot, okay?” She looks up into his eyes as he places the tape around her bandage, taking great care to make it perfect before ripping off another piece with his canines.

“I don’t think that.” He sighs as he tapes another piece onto the bandage, the dressing remaining clean and intact for now. “I only said that because I…”

“Look, I don’t care what you call yourself: Steve, Grant, Martha, Joe.” She shrugs, “I’m just glad that you’re here.”

He finishes dressing her wound in silence before swallowing a dry lump in his throat, thinking of all the people he’d lost that day that he’d give anything to hear that from, that he’d give anything to tell that to before they disappeared. He wonders for a second how many people she had lost to the wind, if she had to witness them falling apart into nothingness like burnt embers floating off a campfire right before her eyes. He wonders if they were people that she was close to, if they were friends, family, or maybe even a lover. He’d been so caught up in his own grief that he forgot to acknowledge hers in this hurricane of nightmares they were both trying so desperately to navigate through.

“I’m glad I’m here, too.” He finishes his work on her arm and runs his palm over it to smooth out any rough edges, squeezing her shoulder affectionately on its way back up. He takes a deep breath and forces himself to be present, to put the horrors aside as his eyes travel over her shoulder and neck, noticing a cut on her cheek that’s mostly healed. “Is this from the storm, too?” He touches the skin just above it.

“Yeah.” She lets him turn her head to the side to get a better look, the warmth of his hand softening her features as he brings the opposite one up to gently cradle her face. She holds her breath as he looks her over, his somber eyes taking her in before guiding her face back toward the center, back toward him. He weaves his fingers into her hairline as his lips part, the calluses on his thumbs brushing over her temples as he brings her face even closer to his.

“You’ve got to be more careful,” he whispers, the weight of his words carrying the ghosts of his past along with them. “Please,” he kisses his request into her forehead, the fear of her joining them stronger than he cares to admit as he keeps his lips pressed tightly against her skin.

“I will.” She’s wanted to be this close to him for as long as she can remember, the needs of the many always outweighing her own until now. Here in his hands she finally feels safe enough to relax, to be a priority in someone else’s eyes, to have her own desires fulfilled with him if only for a fleeting moment.

“Promise me.” He inhales the scent of her hair before pulling back just enough to brush her nose with his, his fingers now massaging her scalp as he peers into her eyes.

“I promise.” Her heart skips a beat as his lashes fall down over visibly darkened eyes, despite the harsh fluorescent lighting above them. She can feel those lashes flutter softly against her as he kisses the wound on her cheek, keeping those lips on her as if he’s afraid of what will happen if he breaks contact.

“Are you hurt anywhere else?” She hears him whisper against her ear, his chest now rising and falling in tandem with her own.

She nods her head within the confines of his grasp, pointing to the tip of her nose to see if the moves of her favorite fictional archaeologist will work on him. “Here.”

He kisses her nose before she repeats the word, pointing to her lips as he moves his head down to meet them with a hunger that nearly takes her breath away. She wraps her arms around his waist as she deepens the kiss, opening her mouth to get a taste of him as he quickly follows suit. His beard is soft but still scratches the skin around her mouth as his tongue meets hers. He savors every inch of her as they desperately cling to one another, breathing each other in as if their very survival depends on it. He smooths his hands down her neck and shoulders, forgetting about her wound until he squeezes the back of her arms, forcing her to gasp and withdraw.

“I’m sorry.” His brow furrows as she pulls back just enough for him to see the rush of blood flushing her cheeks and the bit of his saliva still on her lips. “Did I hurt you?”

“No, It’s okay,” she reassures him, hoping this is just a break in their momentum instead of a complete and utter halt. “I just haven’t taken anything for the pain in a while.”

“Are you due for anything now?” He kisses her again, this time more chastely as he strokes a strand of her hair away from her face. “And when’s the last time that you ate anything besides your usual three cups of coffee?”

“It’s been a while.” She smiles as his hands remain on her body, holding her close to him as they both begin to instinctively sway back and forth, dancing to a silent song that only their bodies can hear. She can feel her eyelids becoming heavier as she stares at him, resting her forehead against his as her muscles relax and her heart rate begins to slow.

“What do you say I walk you home?”

#Steve Rogers #Nomad Steve Rogers #Nomad Steve #Steve Rogers x Reader #Steve Rogers Fan Fiction #steve rogers x original female character #Steve Rogers x OFC #Captain America #Chris Evans #Marvel #Infinity War

[sobeautifullyobsessed]

Hello dear! For the kissing prompts I was thinking 20 &/or 69 with Stephen & your OC Hope please, if you’d like.

(Thank your for the prompt - I tried my best, my friend. I hope you will find Hope well represented, as it's told from Stephen's pov. It might be kind of stilted and tropey, but fingers crossed that in the end, it hits the right notes!)

Stephen Strange x Hope Collins (OFC)

established relationship, angst, hurt/comfort, 1.4k words

kissing prompts #20 - hand kisses and/or #69 – kissing your lover so gently, worried that if you pull away for just one second, they might disappear

Stephen Strange was leading a great life. Better then he’d ever imagined could be possible. He was doing work that he absolutely loved--and believed in his bones had always been his destiny. Sure, the hours were long and unpredictable, and his responsibilities invariably lead him into mortal danger, but he had found a true and fulfilling purpose. And despite the miseries and loneliness, the overwhelming darkness and constant deprivation of all things good and human, which he had suffered in his lonely quest for the path to victory over Thanos, Stephen was happier than he’d ever been in his life.

For beyond the fulfillment he took in his capacity of Sanctum Master and a leader among the ancient Society of the Mystic Arts, he was no longer alone. He’d found a helpmate—of sorts, anyway, for his woman was not actually an initiate of Magic—whose love for him was unfailing. Who accepted the vagaries and daily uncertainties of life at his side with an ease borne of her love for him. Which included five years of having loved him in absentia without any hope that he might someday return.

Not that Hope didn’t worry about him when he headed off into danger or fret for his safety when he was overdue and hadn’t been in touch to let her know he was still alive and well. She had accepted such things as part of the package, always showing him a face of calm and confidence when he departed, and then only understated relief upon his return.

Of course, Stephen knew Hope well enough to understand how she kept most of her very normal misgivings to herself for his sake—and loved her all the more for it, while doing his best in whatever way he could, to minimize her need to worry. While she did her best to make the Sanctum more than his responsibility and living space. Hope’s love and dedication had made the Sanctum very much his hearth and home. Turned the rooms of his suite warm and cozy and sheltering, thus as close to a normal home as a Sanctum Master might ever know.

Their reunion in the months following The Return had blossomed into the sweetest, most natural, romantic relationship of Stephen’s life—and six months later they were going strong, and though Hope still maintained her little studio apartment midtown, for all intents and purposes she had taken up residence as much in his home as in his heart. In addition to being Guardian of the New York Sanctum, Stephen was often called away for days or even a week or so at a time, as their Reality—first so badly broken by Thanos and then abruptly restored in an event of cosmic proportions—required diligent attending to, and Masters of the Mystic Arts the whole world over had their share to do in shoring up and cracks or fissures that followed as slowly diminishing irregularities in the fabric of existence. But Hope had a full enough life of her own as an Art Therapist and teacher (taking the occasional commission, while drawing and painting for pleasure) that she came to think of Stephen’s absences akin to business trips with the unavoidable, added element of peril. And thus their life went on.

Though content beyond all previous measures, Stephen still knew more than a Master’s share of stress and worry, and both physical and mental exhaustion. Not unlike throughout his years as the nation’s foremost neurosurgeon. In those days, he had worn a seeming impenetrable armor of invulnerability, hiding what he considered weaknesses from the world. He had only ever allowed Christine Palmer to catch glimpses behind that façade, but in general he bore such things stoically and on his own. Invariably, they’d find an outlet of expression--since his sister Donna’s death in the summer before he left for college, Stephen periodically suffered stunningly realistic, soul-searing nightmares. He would awaken in terror, drenched in sweat, gasping for breath, shaken to his core. But in the aftermath, like a pressure cooker venting steam, he would find equilibrium enough to carry forward with less of a burden. For a time.

Tonight’s nightmare was a doozy. Extra painful. And a visitation back to the 14 million timelines he had experienced in his quest to save half of all life on Earth and in the Universe. In an unending parade, Stephen found himself powerless to save the soul most dear to him. Watching Hope die vicious, violent deaths over and over again—deaths which he had endured--while Thanos himself presented the cruelest choice which Stephen’s subconscious could conceive of:  save the girl or save the universe. You can never have both, Stephen Strange, the mad Titan intoned with each iteration, and how will you live with yourself either way?

Stephen lost track of how many timelines he looped through. His dream-self begged for Thanos to relent, offering his own life up in place of the choices before him. He heard Hope crying out for help, crying out his name again and again, and it hurt like nothing in his waking life ever had, for he knew he was doomed to pick the greater good. The bitter taste of self-hatred filled his mouth. Despair filled his veins. He cried out hoarsely in the midst of his nightmare, calling upon the Vishanti for mercy—and so intense was his plea, that he cried out in reality as well.

A dear voice filled with concern, a cool hand on his brow, broke through the miasma that held him tight. “Stephen, please…it’s a nightmare…you’re…you’re dreaming, darling. I swear it’s not real. Open your eyes…open them please, and come back to me…” Hope leaned above him, shaking him gently, the ends of her hair skimming across his shoulder.

Like a lifeline thrown to a drowning man, her urgent, loving voice tugged him up from the dreadful depths of his fears. He snapped open his eyes to discover her face hovering over his. Marveling at the tracks of her tears juxtaposed against her soft, relieved smile, Stephen cupped her cheek. “What can I do? How can I help you, darling?” she whispered, turning her head slightly to kiss his palm. In the very way she had on the night they’d met and shared their first kisses. “This is the worst of them in months, isn’t it? Please…I’d do anything to help you, Stephen. Just tell me what to do.”

Stephen let out a slow breath while tracing the edge of his thumb along her cheekbone. Mesmerized by the pure power of the love in her eyes. “Them,” he croaked, “Months? This isn’t the first time you've been here when the nightmares came?”

Hope simply shrugged and looked down a moment. “I wanted to ask each time it happened before, but by the morning you always appeared…unscathed. If you didn’t remember, I didn’t want to remind you.” She raised her eyes again and a sweet furrow of determination stood between her brows. “But you shouldn’t try to hide this from me anymore. I want to know everything. Because you’re not alone and you don’t need to bear whatever this is, alone.”

“I should do that,” he conceded, realizing the truth. That he wasn’t doomed to perpetual solitude. That he’d found someone with a strong enough heart to stand strong for him when he was weak. “It’s a ridiculous force of habit that I haven’t already.”

Hope pursed her lips prettily and then told him, “It certainly has been, Stephen Strange. Not your first, and I’m sure not your last…” She took his free hand and brushed her lips across his knuckles, “And there’s no better time than the present.”

“How about we compromise, honey,” he asked, sliding the hand on her cheek along to thread his fingers in her hair, “In the morning, over breakfast, with the sunshine lighting your eyes the way I love…and after a good night’s rest?” She parted her lips to begin a reply, but by then Stephen had lowered her face close. To kiss Hope softly. Patiently. Ever so gently. And as though if he were to let her go for even a second, she would be as the stuff of dreams—too flattering sweet to be substantial.

Hope’s kiss, though, was proof of her promise. That he needn’t face his future or his fears alone ever again.

for more about Stephen and Hope:

'Friday in the Park with Stephen' (how they met; light & fluffy)

14,000,604 (angst, hurt/comfort, romance, passion, smut)

If you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging, or reblogging with a comment. The only way an author’s work can be seen by a wider audience depends on YOU.💗

buy me a coffee?☕

#my writing #kissing prompts #stephen strange x ofc #doctor strange x ofc #Doctor Strange x Hope Collins #Stephen Strange x Hope Collins #Hope Collins #OFC #Stephen Strange #Doctor Strange #doctor strange fan fiction #doctor strange fanfiction #stephen strange fan fiction #stephen strange fanfiction #Benedict Cumberbatch #Doctor Strange 2016 #avengers: infinity war #avengers: endgame #Strangebatch #My Eternal Muse #writing prompts

[k1ranishf4]

Loki always had this little voice in the back of his mind, telling him that he didn’t fit in. It had been silent at first, not above a mere whisper, so he hadn’t given it any attention.

Yet, he knew. He’d always know.

He was different from the other Asgardians.

Asgard was a folk driven by battle and victory; followed by feasts in the taverns paired with extraordinary amounts of mead. But Loki never felt the passion for war as much as they did. He liked the chaos, yes, yet he preferred books, peace and quiet over the loud music and roaring voices of excited Asgardians; men and women, alike.

His signature fighting style consisted of daggers and his magic. He liked being within his enemies’ personal spaces while eliminating them; no different from the others. However, he was the only one in all of Asgard to use magic during battles, as far as he’d known. Which was obvious, given that Mother had taught him when he and Thor were children. It didn’t bother him, in that sense; he was rather proud of his skills, but it made it clearer that there were differences between him and the other Asgardians.

Not to mention the shadow that had been present since his childhood. The huge shade shaped like Thor which he could never escape. His brother always earned the utmost respect and everyone’s approval by doing the barest thing. Even Odin easily approved of him, yet Loki had always had to fight for the same approval. Respect was no question, he was a prince of Asgard, after all. Not respecting him would mean great consequences one way or another.

However, there were specific people who dared to cross that border. No wonder; they were Thor’s friends and being his younger brother meant nothing. Loki felt bitterness.

Thor’s friends would never truly come to like Loki, much less respect him. Fandral had been more or less tolerable, that much Loki could admit, but the other three had never been his favorite people. Perhaps, they could have been, in a different universe, had they not decided to admire Thor and cast Loki further into a void of the shadows. They made it easier for Loki to notice every single difference and everything he lacked that Thor had.

Thor was the golden child, the boy that could do no wrong, the prince that would never forgive wrongdoings to the throne and his people. What Loki did, he could do better and faster. What Odin saw in Thor, he could never see in Loki. Both were led to believe that they’d be great kings, only one was destined for the throne. Loki was not the one. Never had been.

Of course. Odin wouldn’t allow a Frost Giant on the throne of Asgard, after all. Yet another difference for him to add to the list. Thor was the rightful heir to the throne, the biological son, the true prince. Loki was nothing but the peace treaty between two realms that he didn’t belong to. Not the heir to the throne, not a biological son, a false prince of Asgard.

His skin didn’t look right anymore. He wasn’t sure if it ever had, to begin with. His Aesir form was not his true self, his Jotun form had never been his self. He was a soul standing between two shells which it didn’t belong to. His life was made of lies; he was made of lies. He may not have been destined to be a crown prince or king, but he was always destined to be the God of Mischief and Lies.

He hadn’t been given the chance to be something different. From the moment he was born, from the day Odin took him, it was written that he would be the personification of lies.

He didn’t fit in Jotunheim, he was no giant.

He didn’t fit in Asgard, he was no warrior.

He was Loki, the God of Mischief, the Trickster, the Master of Lies and Deception.

He was not Laufey’s son, he had never been given the chance to be.

He was not Odin’s son, he had never been given the opportunity to be.

He was Frigga’s son.

He may not fit in, not in Jotunheim neither in Asgard, but he knew that he’d always have a place by his mother’s side.

And when she was gone, he didn’t have a place again.

Perhaps that was his fate. Death had never been an option and Life had decided to hate him when he was born. Odin was wrong when he said that his birth right had been to die.

If that were the case, he wouldn’t have taken Loki in to ensure his survival; diplomatic reasons or not. In fact, Loki never found out the true reasons behind Odin’s actions back then. He had been blinded by rage to care and Odin had been unavailable to properly explain.

Then, Odin left as well. Partially because Loki had put a spell on him and sent him to Midgard, partially because Odin had lost his strength long ago and it became a matter of time before he would have to go.

Hela appeared and Loki had to team up with Thor once again to defeat her. This time had been different, though. This time, he felt like he belonged. Not to Jotunheim, nor to Asgard, but beside his brother. When had he stopped feeling that way? He couldn’t recall.

Yet, he knew. He knew he’d always belong next to Thor. A lifetime in his shadow, only a deception by his mind. Perhaps because he used to be jealous that Odin had favored Thor over him. They were nothing without each other. Wherever one brother went, the other would follow, eventually.

It had always been that way; how had Loki not noticed earlier?

The only place the one could not follow the other was death. Frankly, Loki didn’t want Thor to follow him to death. It had surprised him that he ended up in Valhalla, in the first place, but he knew he wouldn’t ever want Thor to arrive here. Not yet, at least.

He always had questioned if he would ever belong in Valhalla. He always thought he’d arrive in Hel. But being reunited with Mother, seeing the Warriors Three and the countless Einherjar, Valkyries, and the innocent Asgardians that had been killed by Thanos answered that question.

Loki belonged next to Thor, and by his mother’s side, in Valhalla.

-

Ao3 if you want it

I recommend listening to Paris, Texas by Lana Del Rey on loop while reading, that’s how I wrote it lmao

#ao3 #fanfiction #writers on tumblr #mcu loki #loki fanfic #loki feels #loki marvel #loki angst #thor movies #avengers infinity war #thor odinson #loki odinson #loki laufeyson #loki friggason #mcu frigga #odin #fan fiction #ao3 link #fanfic writing #writing

[theblackwidower]

Twilight's Endgame: Chapter One - You Gotta Move On

One year later, Twilight and her remaining friends continue to adjust to their new lives. Continue reading Twilight’s Endgame: Chapter One – You Gotta Move On

View On WordPress

#Avengers #Avengers: Endgame #Avengers: Infinity War #Fan Fiction #FanFic #Fiction #Marvel Cinematic Universe #MCU #My Little Pony #My Little Pony Friendship is Magic #Twilight&039;s Endgame

[idlerin]

nonsense — 37. media craze

the next day…

while waiting for the next chapter, why not check out the latest distanse articles here!

masterlist — previous | next

✦ fun facts !

yes the articles even have the newest one in the last panel (i have too much free time)

oikawa and [name] decided to have a movie marathon because it was oikawa’s first day-off in a while.

they were in the middle of watching infinity war when oikawa got a message and went to the kitchen to take a call, oikawa was taking too long so [name] decided to pause the movie and wait for him. then she decided to finally open her phone after having it off the whole day (it was goddamned saturday, leave her be), then saw all the crazy notifs.

kenma does not remember where oikawa’s place was, he went back home and spammed [name]’s phone instead.

kuroo went to tsukki and akaashi’s place and argued with tsukki about what [name] could be doing right now.

akaashi was concerned about [name], missed bokuto, and was just tired of kuroo and tsukki’s voices.

are you wondering where bokuto is during all of this? bby is fast asleep he got super tired during training today.

nonsense ! an oikawa tooru social media au

synopsis. you were oikawa tooru’s #1 fan, until you became his #1 hater. you hated him so much you went viral on twitter (accidentally) and literally became known as “the oikawa tooru hater”, doesn’t help that he keeps fueling the fire by subtweeting you. everyone is all in for this new drama. what isn’t known to the public, is that this particular drama’s been on hold for three years (him being your ex and all).

a/n — pls do not focus on the dates under the tweets, it is june !! for them, i’m just too lazy to fix it im so sorry ekdkendb ps. there is no date-day accuracy shh its fiction.

taglist is closed ! + (1/2) @kawaii-angelanne @ceneridiankaa @kittycasie @rukia-uchiha-98 @polish-cereal @kellesvt @rockleeisbaeeee @kashxyou @imsoluvly @jjulliette @tooruchiiscribs @littlefreakjulia @gomjohs @qualitygiantshoepsychic @mellowknightcolorfarm @konzumeken @migosple @kuroogguk @sangwooooo @katsu-shi @wolffmaiden @rijhi @2baddies-1porsche @yeehawcity @aishkaaa @crueldinasty @renardiererin @yyuiz @llamakenma @penguinlovestowrite @princelingperfect @hearts4faey @yoonabeo @pantherhappy @julia-1901 @godsbiggestmenace @angel-luv-04 @noideawhothatis @bethbat @natsvmie @luna-mothii @lylovw @apinu @leave-rae-alone @kamikokii @bananasquash @eitaababe @minimari415 @hanabihwa @nilopillo

#haikyuu smau #haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #oikawa tooru x reader #celebrity au #celebrity smau #actor au #model au #college au #haikyuu smau series #oikawa tooru x you #haikyuu oikawa tooru #exes to lovers #— nonsense. #— smaus. #haikyuu fluff #hq #haikyuu x you #oikawa tooru #hq smau

[ssturniolo92]

Matt Sturniolo-Marvel Fan

pairing- matt sturniolo x reader (platonic nic and chris)

genre-fluff

warnings-cursing

description-after getting invited to watch a movie at the triplets house, y/n regrets agreeing to watch it

you had just gotten a call from nic asking you to come over and watch a movie, so now you were headed to their place.

you got there and they were already on the couch so they asked you to get them their snacks from the kitchen. as you were grabbing the bags you heard the familiar soundtrack.

“NO,” you yelled out.

“you already promised…” nic said.

“i hate all of you.”

three hours later nic started recording a tiktok.

“we just watched infinity war, and i kid you not this bitch started crying two seconds in.” he said walking up to you.

“haven’t you seen these movies like ten times.” chris said as he ate popcorn.

“yes but it’s still horrible.” you yelled, the tears running down your cheeks.

“okay we’re watching end game next.” matt said grabbing the remote.

you snuggled into him as the movie stayed and he rubbed your back. you immediately started crying when you heard tony speak.

at natasha’s death scene you were sobbing so hard that you could hardly breathe.

“y/n, they’re fictional characters.” nick said gently.

“shut the fuck up nick.” you cried.

matt kissed your forehead and you dug your head deeper into his chest.

[time skip]

you heard the little beep on nicks phone letting you know he was recording you.

“three hours after we finished endgame she’s still fucking crying.” chris sighed, putting his hands on his hips.

“you guys don’t understand, marvel was literally my childhood.” you told them, attempting your best death glare.

“kid cried over a movie.” chris laughed.

“if infinity stones were real i would snap the fuck out of you.” you told him with another glare.

#milarq46 #matt #sturniolo #chris #chris sturniolo #fluff #matt sturniolo fluff #nick #marvel #nicolas sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo

[jackshade21]

Four Years of Growth

I know it's sad that we'll never see the Guardians of the Galaxy in their prime again. Meaning the main group of Star-Lord, Rocket, the original Gamora, Groot, Drax and Mantis.

There was a four year gap that takes place between Guardians of the Galaxy Vol.2 and Avengers: Infinity War. Guardians Vol.2 left us with Peter dealing with the loss of his father figure, Peter and Gamora starting a romantic relationship, Mantis joining the group and establishing a close relationship with Drax, Gamora and Nebula starting to mend their broken relationship, Groot being raised by the team as a family and Rocket learning to let people love him and to love them in return.

There is so much potential for stories set in those four years. So much growth happens in that time frame. Peter and Rocket go from being at each other’s throats in Vol.2 to being best friends in Vol.3. Mantis learns to give as good as she gets from Drax and I refuse to believe that Nebula didn’t end up running into them on more than one occasion because Gamora goes from saying “I hate you” and wanting to take her in for a bounty to giving Thanos the location of the Soul Stone, dooming the Universe to spare Nebula.  

I need to really start focusing and write fan fiction cause there is so much I’d love to see. So if you’re one of those gracious and talented writers that are out there missing the OG Guardians line-up there is a gold mine waiting to be tapped. <3

#Guardians of the Galaxy #GotG #gotg vol 2 #gotg volume 3 spoilers #starlord #Peter Quill #Rocket Raccoon #Groot #Gamora #Nebula #Drax #Mantis #Thanos #Avengers infinity war

[ask-vladimir-makarov]

This blog is going on hiatus until further notice.

This will be a long post. Please read it anyway.

I've gone back and forth on this for a while now. I've been dealing with health problems and real life responsibilities that make it difficult to keep up with my regular posting, let alone with projects like this, which is why I haven't posted in so long. However, in the end, I decided I don't want to anymore.

I like Vladimir Makarov, as a character. I’ve been drawn to him since high school. He’s an interesting character to pick apart and analyze, both in the context of his fictional world and the larger meta context of his place in the narrative and how he’s received by his audience, especially in the realm of fandom.

However, he's also a character who has canonically committed genocide against the Chechen people during the First Chechen War. He is a character who, during his operations as a terrorist, profits from genocide in the Global South, particularly on the continent of Africa. And his reboot incarnation is no better, having taken part in Barkov’s occupation of Urzikstan and seeking to reoccupy it—timeline discrepancies aside, this is the character Infinity Ward and Sledgehammer wrote. And it’s for a reason.

I can sit here and talk about the nuances of fiction and reality and what it means to like a fictional character all day. However, I cannot and will not run a fan blog for a fictional genocider when my country, the United States, is funding, conducting, and aiding and abetting in multiple genocides across the world. I cannot draw Makarov cheekily answering asks about his love life and personal tastes while people suffer in Palestine, in Sudan, in Congo and elsewhere. I cannot contribute to a fandom environment where colonialism, oppression, and genocide are glossed over, whether fictional or real.

I implore everyone who follows this blog, or who reads this post, to do something within your ability if you aren't already. Attend a protest, participate in strikes like the one currently underway, and contact your representatives and implore them to denounce genocide and apartheid. Boycott companies on the BDS list and give your financial support to those who need it, whether that means donating to trustworthy organizations, purchasing e-sims for people on the ground in Gaza, or donating directly to those in need. Buy your electronics used and refurbished, not new. Create art—draw, write, make music, whatever it is you do—in solidarity for the peoples affected by colonialism, apartheid, and genocide. If you use social media frequently, follow those affected by these conflicts, pay attention to the news they share. Take the time to put the present into context and educate yourselves on the history of these conflicts and the systems at play. Encourage others to do the same.

Here is a very small list of resources on Palestine, Sudan, and the DRC to get you started. I may add more links in the near future, but keep in mind this is no way meant to be exhaustive; it is imperative that y’all take the time to inform and investigate yourselves. I nor anyone else can spoon-feed the facts. I've linked directly to donation pages for some, but I encourage y'all to dig through their sites to learn more and find more resources.

🇵🇸 Eye on Palestine + Taawon Association + Palestinian Children's Relief Fund 🇵🇸

🇸🇩 NasAlSudan: The Sudanese Revolution + What is Happening in Sudan? 🇸🇩

🇸🇩 Darfur Women Action Group 🇸🇩

🇨🇩 Friends of the Congo + their Resource Center 🇨🇩

>> kandakat_alhaqq on Twitter also has an extensive linktree of resources on many countries and groups in need of aid, including Sudan and South Sudan, Palestine, Somalia, Congo, Libya, Afghanistan, Yemen, Syria, Morocco, and the Uyghur people Some of the links I've already listed here.

>> Genocide Watch tracks genocide around the world. They have a list of reports by region and many resources on educating oneself about genocide, including a breakdown of the Ten Stages of Genocide.

Finally, as fans of Call of Duty, it’s important to acknowledge and reckon with the fact that these games are military propaganda. I’ve seen this refrain passed around the fandom time and time again, but very rarely do I see it actively engaged with; most often it’s used as a way of dismissing the game’s narratives in favor of doing whatever one wants with the characters. And as someone who’s made it My Thing to do whatever I want with the characters while also staying cognizant of the themes of the stories these characters come from, I’m going to challenge y’all to do the same.

Engage with the propaganda.

Take the time to analyze and deconstruct the games and their themes and pay attention to what viewpoints they’re encouraging. Pay attention to who you, the player, will have your guns pointed at most often, and why.

(Also, please please PLEASE watch Jacob Geller's excellent video, "Does Call of Duty Believe in Anything?")

And for those of us who like Makarov the character, take the time to educate yourselves on the very real things this fictional character was involved in, whether in the context of the original trilogy or the ongoing reboot. Put the present into context. Consider the role this character plays in the narrative, and why.

Do these things privately and publicly. Post about it alongside whatever else you share in fandom, whether that's art, fanfic, headcanons or meta analysis. Discuss it with your fellow fans.

I may one day come back to this blog, or I may not. Please do not hold your breath either way—this blog was a short and fun thing while it lasted, but to me, paying attention to the real world and treating these games with the gravity and depth they require is a more important use of my time. None of us are free until all of us are.

Thank you to the kind people who've followed this blog and sent asks, and thank you for reading this post all the way through.

I’ll see y’all downrange.

#vladimir makarov #call of duty #I feel like this is worth putting in the tags considering. everything.

[super-hero-confessions]

I think a better ending for Steve Rogers would have been...

Him living with Sharon at the beginning of Infinity wars like initially planned, with her getting dusted and him reasonably being distraught about losing her and his friends.

He could still go back for just the dance with Peggy, but instead of staying, he sits down with her to have a discussion about their lives and families: his found one and the life he was making with the woman he'd come to love in the future, and her husband and kids that she was happy to have and be with in the past. Maybe even with them subtly teasing about their missed chance and perhaps getting a turn for it to work out in a different universe or lifetime, but not this one, because they were happy with they way their lives turned out.

The discussion could end with him asking for her blessing to be with Sharon, and admitting that the woman he now loves is her niece, and that he never got to talk to her about it but that he really does care for her. Peggy would happily give her blessing, maybe surprised but glad he'd found happiness and was making someone she would come to love just as happy as her own husband made her. Then giving him shovel talk to protect her niece or else.

That way, they would have shown both of them getting definitive closure to move on with their lives, while honoring the development of all three characters and the arcs they had been leading, along with the goals they had.

It seems misplaced and kind of messed up that Steve would forget about the woman he'd been actively pursuing and had a solid chance with, an entire whole human being person, just to jump at being with someone that he had missed his chance with but had also moved on with her life, told him to move on with his, and that she had been happy and only wanted the same for him.

It feels incredibly disrespectful to every character involved that he just disregards everything she discussed with him while she was older, ignores that she had a family of her own, treats her niece terribly by pursuing her and then 'changing his mind' as if women are interchangeable, and that Peggy would be okay with all of this and want to be with him after the fact, assuming he told her. And if he didn't, then that just makes him an even bigger jerk.

This ending wasn't thought out at all, especially with the previous narratives in place and the initial plans that they kept changing just to meet the expectations of extremely toxic fandom misogyny, and the people who hated Sharon Carter just for existing, when she'd done nothing wrong, and neither had Steve in pursuing her romantically.

It gets worse because the way fans treated Emily VanCamp in turn, over fictional characters sex lives no less, was just awful and so messed up and uncalled for.

This ending was based off a fan theory, and meant to be 'fan service', but fan fiction is free and shouldn't be affecting canon, nor should people be made to pay for writing so lazy, ideas are directly stolen from fandom, fan theories, or fan fiction, whether some like it or not.

Steve wouldn't have forgotten Sharon or treated her like that. Peggy wouldn't have wanted him to forget her precious baby niece who she would have loved and cherished far more than a missed chance at romance, especially when she had moved on and lived her life.

The ending we should have gotten for Steve, Peggy, and Sharon would have been best if the above mentioned or something similar were done, finishing off with Steve coming back to the present and getting down on one knee when he finally sees Sharon again. You know why. And he'd still be ready and able to toss the shield over to Sam, still working to help his friends behind the scenes, and Evans could still leave with the door open for new stories that don't focus on Steve but keep his character and message consistent, with a chance for cameos even.

Plus the opportunity for an Agent 13 movie that could have even included her great aunt who would have inspired and encouraged her.

Instead, fans were made to pay for a poor, no thought, cop out fan fiction theory, stolen directly from fan discourse on Reddit. And Steve got turned into Joe Biden, which no one asked for nor deserved to have injected into their brains.

The fans of Peggy, 'Steggy', and even other ships, who collectively bullied Emily for playing Sharon, contemplating getting her to commit suicide, a real life human being, just to get the 'character' written out! The same fans that relentlessly went after the fans of Sharon with the same if not worse attitude, were rewarded for terrible misbehavior that Disney should have worked to shut down before it could begin, not fuel the hate train by encouraging and promoting the actress who started and practically campaigned on it.

After claiming she'd play Sharon, and that if she did, it would be 'true love'. But if she doesn't play Sharon, then and only then is it 'disgusting' and 'disrespectful' and 'incestuous'.

It was never any of those things...

But those were her words, pulled from her interviews. Because apparently, Sharon was only worth something if 'Hayley Atwell' was the one playing her.

It take two seconds to verify what she did, the things she said, how long she did it for (several years following the casting of Emily), and how often (almost every interview).

And that's just the tip of the iceberg.

She hurt real people, caused real pain and cyberbullying so bad, Emily did interviews on how much hate she was getting, and it still didn't stop. Human lives were held in the balance and I'm sorry if people find being told the truth 'annoying' but a life should never be worth less than a fictional story, entertainment, or self gratification, to anyone, for any reason.

And it is a very different animal when the actions of fictional characters, or storyline decisions, start to spill into real life and affect real people, as opposed to fictional people.

Maybe I'm in the minority, maybe I always will be. But what I see is something wrong being made out to be something right, and if Captain America taught me anything, it wasn't to bully others or accept them getting bullied.

So I throb with righteousness for Sharon Carter, Emily VanCamp, and the fans who got the short stick for no reason. She deserves nothing but love and justice for everything that happened.

"You move."

#confession #steve rogers #sharon carter #peggy carter #mcu

[webslingingspidergirl]

Wattpad Cover and Title reveal

It will be both on Wattpad and Tumblr

Title is Called Between Two Worlds Anakin Skywalker Marvel(mcu) and Star Wars Crossover (fanfiction)

It will be on Wattpad also and I’m gonna start writing the first chapter

By the way I am not good at making covers 

The fan fiction will be set in Attack of the clones and in this Anakin never had feelings for Padme instead he will have feelings for reader (you) instead and I’m gonna make this fanfiction set in an alternate universe where the Avengers won in infinity war and half population and the other Avengers were never erased by Thanos

Reader (y/n)(you) will be nineteen years old (I’m also gonna make Peter Parker nineteen also)(yes Peter is gonna be the readers best friend)

#anakin skywalker x reader #Star Wars #marvel #marvel x reader #avengers x reader #crossover fanfiction

[meydia]

Blood Meridian; or, the Evening Redness in the West (1985) - Cormac McCarthy

Rating: 10/10

Reading this novel was like being reminded that evil persists, exists, is stoked by the mechanisms that people before us have carefully or carelessly put into place, perpetuated by sons that learn only violence from their fathers, hoping for easy solutions, for another whiskey or another fuck, onward into infinity like dancing bears on a very vast and dusty stage made of wood planks with ancient blood pooled in its cracks.

Just like its subject - the scalp trade in the Borderlands - McCarthy’s writing here is difficult to digest, forces you to slow down and absorb the horrors in their entirety. He lists these in excruciating detail - the gang commits massacre after massacre, unnecessary violence against innocent people, violence against people who fight back, violence against the people who employed them in the first place. All of these horrors are both fictional and real, based upon the actions of a real-life figure and leader of said gang, John Joel Glanton and his mysterious right-hand man, the Judge.

Yet McCarthy chooses to focus on the Judge as representative of true evil; supernatural in appearance, actions and worldly knowledge, the Judge states that “Whatever exists in creation without my knowledge exists without my consent.” After he records it tidily in his journal, we see him snuff out centuries, millennia-old example of human art with one giant hand - a scene that struck me strangely hard, considering that we had just seen him kill countless people, had been implied to harm children in unspeakable ways, had played the gang like a cruel fiddle for nothing but nihilistic enjoyment. And yet he is symbolically an imperialist symbol, consuming everything since he seems to truly believe in nothing but the tune of war and games of chance. No judge in the sense of justice - he holds court only in bloodsport and bloodshed.

And yet we see The Kid, our true protagonist, also born with a propensity of violence, show mercy; he helps; he is moved; he is unswayed by the Judge’s simplistic philosophy couched in the words of a skilled orator. We see him move on and become The Man. We see him kill, still; but he warns, he attempts to rescue others, he wants nothing to do with the game. He quits it entirely. His soul remained intact, and what happens at the end of the book… only happened because the Judge knew no other way to subdue it. And I think that gives me hope.

—

Personal note: I finished this book over a VERY long stretch - give or take 6+ months - but it was worth it in the end. I’m not necessarily a fan of historical novels, nor epic works, but occasionally I work myself up to it. I’m looking to maybe read Cormac McCarthy’s The Road next now that I’m used to his meandering style. I’m curious to know what people think about this book too though I’m aware that it’s already been dissected to bits and pieces everywhere on the literary internet and in reading groups and in universities.

A must-read for people unfamiliar with extreme violence and conflict, or those who want to learn about the Borderlands at the time, or if you just want to read beautiful descriptions of disgusting violence and a gorgeous, unfeeling and dangerous landscape.

#book review #Cormac McCarthy #historical fiction #booklr #bookish #book blog #American literature #literature #blood meridian #borderlands #tw: violence #tw: implied csa #tw: death #tw: genocide #tw: gun violence #tw: animal death #books

[paterday]

When I was watching my first ever marvel movie, (which was infinity war in theatres) about half way thru I got so bored I left to go read Danny phantom fan fiction in the bathroom for 20 minutes and I still don’t know what I missed. Somebody could’ve died. But I was too busy. Reading Danny Phantom fan fiction. In the bathroom.

#the fact that it was my literal first ever marvel movie probably did not help #I only knew like. iron man. and hulk. idr if he was in there #and Spider-Man