#insomniathoughts

[bitchhhwithbpd]

I want to kill myself

Not like death

But kill my past self and start a fresh. I want to erase my existence before now. I want a new slate, a new me without past traumas, baggage, past mistakes, past memories, past everything.

I want it to seem like I just came into existence

#insomniathoughts #nfrealmusic #borderline personality disorder #bpd splitting #nf #shtumblr #self h@rm #selfharn #sh relapse #tw self destructive behavior #borderline blog

[dropkicktheewok]

Ive been thinking a lot lately about death and time 

And how time leads to death 

How ‘new’ things degrade and how childhood sidestreets crack and fall apart 

How death cannot happen without time 

How time cannot happen without the death of other times 

How time and death control everything that we live for 

How death almost worked that time..

And how time has saved me from death for 8 months now 

How time has killed so many of the people I love 

And the eeriness of time stealing another away from me

Anytime

I don’t like these thoughts and I wish something would take them away from me 

Whichever comes first

#insomniathoughts #kindofmorbid #time #death #timeanddeath

[thatlatinaprincess]

I’m highly convinced we’re living in a season of American Horror Story😭😈🦠👽🔪

#AHS #AmericanHorrorStory #2020 #2021 #ItsCrazy #InsomniaThoughts

[sodachicken]

Ghosted 👻

Oh, don't you worry...

Because some individuals can move on from one person to the next,

Like changing the channel, or turning the page.

It won't matter what's left in the past, or what's left unspoken.

And even though it might drive you insane knowing you're left behind like you're nothing,

You won't be missing out when they change another channel, or turn another page.

~ SodaChicken

#short poem #poem #poetry #ghosted #moving on #breakup #insomniathoughts

[tracyarrowsmith]

Two major work deadlines are looming this week. 1. Assess all my lower kiddos for SIPPS placement. We don’t have them on Friday due to a PD Day. All assessments have to be turned in by 9/2. 2. Asynchronous PD for me on our new Language Arts program giving me the .4 CEUs I desperately need towards my final salary bump due Tuesday by midnight. It’s a 6 hour course. I’ve done maybe an hour of it. I then need 6 units to fully move the next/final salary step giving me a $6K bump but I think I’m going to do 2 classes over summer virtually to fulfill that. Since I won’t be working for 2 months but I also won’t be getting paid for 2 months. #insomniathoughts (at The Big Fig) https://www.instagram.com/p/CTMfjI2nfTlaRcySwIWT8W_6ikrqBCghl5wNhM0/?utm_medium=tumblr

#insomniathoughts

[tiatampi]

Kalau ada salah satu dari sekian hal yang kurang aku sukai di dunia ini, satu yang sangat mengganggu adalah sexism. Banyak yang menganggap punya anak laki-laki itu lebih berharga, padahal apa lah artinya punya anak laki-laki kalau tidak tumbuh menjadi manusia yang kompeten. . Mungkin akan ada yang bilang: “Gampang lah ngomong gitu kalau udah punya anak laki-laki.” Iya aku memang punya anak laki-laki, tapi aku sendiri anak perempuan yang selalu hidup di lingkungan budaya patrilineal dari lahir sampai sekarang di rantauan. Dari yang kualami & amati selama ini, anak laki-laki lebih sering dinanti. Kalau belum ada anak laki-laki, usaha lagi. Pokoknya kalau sudah ada anak laki-laki, baru aman. Sudah ada penerus marga. Lalu anak laki-laki ini akan dibesarkan dengan kasih & sumber daya melimpah ruah. . Walau terdengar asal & bercanda, suamiku pun pernah bicara tentang lebih berharganya anak laki-laki. Berhubung aku penganut paham “selalu ada ugly truth di setiap bercandaan”, saat itu juga dia langsung kuceramahi. Sangatlah dangkal memberi status penerus marga tanpa membekali ia dengan kualitas kepala keluarga. Punya anak perempuan yang percaya diri & berprestasi tentu lebih membawa damai dari pada punya anak laki-laki yang hanya dikenal sebagai akamsi. . Di sisi lain, memberi penghargaan berlebihan kepada pencapaian seorang perempuan juga menurutku merupakan bentuk sexism. “Wah, hebat ya perempuan bisa baca peta.” atau “Keren banget cewek bisa ganti ban mobil sendiri.” Sebenarnya mau perempuan atau laki-laki, semua bisa mengerjakan apapun asal mau belajar & dikasih kesempatan. Jadi paham ya, anak perempuan dan laki-laki itu sama berharganya.. Sama-sama berkat & titipan Tuhan. . . #tiatampithought #insomniathoughts #besokmasihlibur #motherandson #stopsexism https://www.instagram.com/p/CO0k5RwN4B8/?igshid=1misudrc0yf9w

#tiatampithought #insomniathoughts #besokmasihlibur #motherandson #stopsexism

[strungoutmom]

When we started the school year remotely, I knew our family would not return until it was absolutely necessary. Thankfully, it hasn't been and they were going to continue to go to school remotely. This was an easy, personal choice for us. I have worried about social harm and less activity, but to me, it's such a small sacrifice in the span of their life. Still, it keeps me up at night. I know we are ridiculously lucky to have this opportunity. And, keep them in the school system we love. But, the woulda, shoulda, couldas plague me. #latergram #remotelearning #busyclemom #mommoments #insomniathoughts https://www.instagram.com/p/CGj1V2XHipN/?igshid=1hr1hjo8sg0im

#latergram #remotelearning #busyclemom #mommoments #insomniathoughts

[johnnykid13]

Late at night when the people you know are asleep and you’re wide awake left with memories, do you ever ever wonder how many people have tried to erase you from their memory? Or maybe the memory of you is their favorite? If someone asked you, “who is your favorite memory?”, could you even answer that?

#insomniathoughts

[ieatdreamsforfun-blog]

Went on a date for the first time in forever... but the entire time all I could see was your face from the first day we met.

Honestly my heart broke into a million more pieces.

Partly because I'll never be able to move on. And partly because I know you don't care.

#insomniathoughts #5am thoughts

[bitchhhwithbpd]

I want to tell you I'm depressed but i dont want you to ask me what wrong cause i also dont fucking know

#insomniathoughts #borderline personality disorder #bpd splitting #self h@rm #bpd sucks #actually bpd #bpd recovery #borderline pd #tw self destructive behavior #depressing post #tw depressing stuff #tw mania #tw selfhate #boderline personality disorder #bpd blog #bpd episode

[jedi-winchester]

I'm wide awake at 4am and can't stop thinking about how horrible it's going to be for Sam and Dean to return to the bunker in season 13. No Mary, no Cas, Lucifer Jr is alive, and on top of all of that...there's still a huge hole in the bunker to fix. Grenade launcher cleanup can be a bitch.

#sam winchester #jared padalecki #dean winchester #jensen ackles #mary winchester #samantha smith #castiel #misha collins #spn #supernatural #spn13 #season 13 thoughts #insomnia #insomniathoughts #dean's grenade launcher

[resonanteye]

insomnia hello! I felt great all day though. that's a good thing. getting ready to start a huge summer art project that I know I'll have difficulties finding a gallery that will show it. gonna go right ahead anyway. these paintings will be for me I suppose. still working on the tattoo hands also, but plenty of places would hang that series. it's the crime scene stuff I'm concerned about. the project is my baby. I'm planning ahead with focus, method and medium and putting thought and concern into the choices i make overall and individually. and every once in a while that voice in my head reminds me- these won't hang. nobody is going to have this in a space for thirty days... eh, fuck it. sometimes you have to do a thing, because you have to. some projects come from the ether and demand the work get done. this is one of those. #insomniathoughts #gotosleepalready #wtfbrain #ohyesalso #sturgeon #tattoo

#sturgeon #insomniathoughts #wtfbrain #gotosleepalready #tattoo #ohyesalso

[kmads23]

The brain is a tricky thing. It is constantly fooling me into believing things I shouldn't. I know I'm in a very negative head space. All from different things that are bothering me that have formed into this dark energy. What is it about being broken that makes you feel that you have to stay chipper for the sake of others? Just ensure they are unbothered? I think that's where the feeling of isolation comes in...because you haven't fully expressed your emotions. #insomniathoughts

[sodachicken]

3 Important Rules About Life

1. Never make promises you can't keep.

2. Always expect the unexpected.

3. Mistakes are just lessons learned.

~ SodaChicken

#life #rules #words to live by #poetry #short poem #insomniathoughts

[mingchii]

i wonder when will be the next time i’ll see you in my dreams again

#insomniathoughts #quote #missing

[dingsum]

Te has convertido en un anhelo, por no decir una ligera pero toxica obsesión... No te odio por ser una persona ingenua, o capaz, carente de inteligencia emocional. Me odio a mi mismo permitir que me importe, que me afecte, que me vulnere cada vez que entablas contacto conmigo. Sabes lo que haces y a veces esperas con total curiosidad el nivel de mis acciones y hasta el límite de ellas; consciente de ello sin algún remordimiento... Deseo que llegue el día en que tu honestidad, tu franqueza, la claridad en tus palabras y acciones acaben con mi absurda forma de seguir embelesado por ti... O permitas que mi inmenso amor te cause una placentera toxicidad.

...Tan solo decídete, que mi corazón no es un videojuego con vidas infinitas.

-RETA

#decisions #feelings #emotions #justthat #thoughts #insomniathoughts #madruPensamientos #aquiestoy #cansadodeesperar #expectativas #loveactions #waiting #embeleso