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femmefatalevibe · 9 months

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Femme Fatale Guide: Types of Relationships To Help You Thrive In Life

Table of Contents:

Healthy Relationship With Yourself

Peer-To-Peer Relationship

Mentorship Relationship

Goal-Oriented/Accountability-Focused Relationship

Emotionally-Intimate Relationship

Physical/Sexually-Intimate Relationship

Acquaintance Relationships

Second-Degree Relationships

Types of Relationships:

Healthy Relationship With Yourself: Internalize and act with the knowledge that you're worthy of love, care, and nourishment, and have unconditional permission to work towards your goals & dream life. Eat healthfully, drink plenty of water, remain well-rested, move your body daily, maintain proper hygiene/a clean home, invest in your appearance to feel your best, live as a life-long learner, establish healthy habits/routines, get your finances in order, establish and maintain boundaries, make positive self-talk a priority.

Peer-To-Peer Relationship: Aka friendships, which are intended to offer mutual support and joy in life. These friendships thrive on having similar values and interests, which makes these individuals your greatest cheerleaders, advice givers/receivers, and partners in crime to have fun or offer platonic love/emotional support during traditional or difficult seasons in your life. Peer-to-peer relationships should add mutual excitement, encouragement, and emotional nourishment, and provide a soundboard for confidential information exchange, ears to listen without unnecessary or superficial judgment, and solicited advice from someone who has your best interest in mind.

Mentorship Relationship: This could be a boss, teacher, professor, aunt, uncle, or another trusted adult(s) who can guide you based on their more extensive life experience/wisdom. You can have one or several mentors at any life stage and for different purposes. These people should be trustworthy (keep your information confidential unless you state otherwise) and express their advice through the lens of your best interest rather than their own personal desires or biases (at least those left unchecked). Ensure you feel safe around these people, and their presence in your life is a mutually-nourishing relationship that allows you to grow personally, professionally, and relationally.

Goal-Oriented/Accountability-Focused Relationship: A coach, mentorship, or friendship based on the achievement of a particular goal or practice. This type of relationship can manifest as an accountability partner or support group. A therapist can also fulfill this role in your life (but like, a coach, this relationship is a one-way street to offer you emotional support/tools & resources). Some reasons for an accountability-oriented relationship include helping you achieve a certain health/fitness goal, establish better routines, advance in your career, let go of unhealthy habits, patterns, or addictions, better manage your finances, or help you get your other relationships (family, partner, friends, self-talk, boss, co-workers, etc.) in order.

Emotionally-Intimate Relationship: Someone with whom you feel an unwavering emotional closeness and connection. This person can be a partner you're involved with sexually/physically intimate with or not. Asexuality exists, of course. And emotional intimacy can definitely exist in close platonic relationships (like your best friendships) without any romantic or sexual feelings. These relationships are important because they allow you to let your emotional walls down and be your vulnerable, authentic self.

Physical/Sexually-Intimate Relationship: This relationship could be with a romantic partner, FWB, with multiple partners, purely with yourself, or somewhere in between. If you have sexual needs, it's important to find pleasurable ways to satisfy these desires in a way that makes you feel most fulfilled and respected. Let go of any shame you experience when exploring this side of yourself. Experiment and learn what you like/dislike/fantasize about. Use this information to elevate your practice and communication with any partner(s) for a heightened, more enjoyable, and potentially closer emotionally-bonding experience.

Hobby/Interest-Centric Relationship: These relationships can extend from co-workers to your friends in a certain class/the one friend you go on weekly walks with, follow a particular TV show with, exchange beauty tips with, "going out" friends, etc. While these connections aren't vulnerable to the degree of a close friendship/relationship, it is important to have some relationships that are purely based on fun, light-hearted conversations, and mutual hobbies/interests/lifestyles. Having someone to share these mutual experiences with helps you feel more connected to your environment/communities, not feel isolated/lonely when your friends, family, or intimate partner has different hobbies, career aspirations, or daily routines/lifestyle compared to you, and provides a mutual soundboard on issues, insights, and exciting moments in this particular area of your life.

Acquaintance Relationships: Everyone needs those friends, co-workers, or classmates they can just chat with when at a party, a group meeting, dinner, a special occasion, to grab a quick lunch or coffee, etc. These people are fun to be around and allow you to indulge in light, easy conversations to offer temporary social support/fulfillment. These relationships also expand your network for professional opportunities, making new friends, finding dates/a potential partner, interest groups/new hobbies, referral services/classes/spaces, and other contacts that can enrich your life.

Second-Degree Relationships: These are friend-of-a-friend type connections who can be/become your future business partners, romantic/sexual partners, co-workers, investors, hairdressers, realtors, stylists, finance managers, etc. Be ready to reciprocate these offers and be this person in others' lives, too. As your network gets broader and more dynamic, better chances and potential there is to connect with the right people to help you achieve your goals, desires, and overall life satisfaction. Success and efficiency rarely – if ever – exist in isolation.

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x-heesy · 3 days

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𝙼𝚢 8𝚝𝚑𝚜 𝚀𝚞𝚘𝚝𝚎:

Children and Animals are the only holy on this Planet -x-heesy

𝙳𝚞 𝙻𝚞𝚗𝚍𝚒 𝚊𝚞 𝚅𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚍𝚒 𝚋𝚢 𝙶𝚠𝚎𝚗𝚍𝚘𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚎

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borderlinereminders · 2 years

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The DEAR MAN skill is considered an interpersonal skill in DBT.

The goal of this skill is to communicate effectively with someone in a way that helps you express your needs/wants in a way that is respectful of all parties involved in hopes of reaching a positive outcome.

Here's an example of a roommate talking to another about stealing their food.

Describe the situation. Stick to facts without judgement and accusations.

Example: I've noticed that you have been eating my food out of the fridge.

Express. This is where you express your emotions, feelings and overall thoughts about the situation. Don’t assume that those things are obvious to the other person.

Example: I find it frustrating because sometimes when I get home, I go to look for something I've been looking forward to but it's gone.

Assert. Ask clearly for what you want.

Example: Please don't eat my food.

Reinforce. Explain the positive outcomes of you getting what you want. Example: It will be less stressful for both of us to live here together if I can feel comfortable and not have to hide my food.

Mindful. Be mindful and do not get distracted from your goal. Do not respond to attacks. And ignore any attempts at distraction. If the conversation starts going in the wrong direction, validate and bring the conversation back to the topic.

Appear confident. Even if you don't feel confident, if you can act confident that can help. Try and speak calmly and clearly.

Negotiate. Interpersonal effectiveness is about also listening to the other person, and in some cases, negotiating.

Negotiating doesn't mean compromising on your boundaries. You do not have to agree to anything they ask for. It's okay to say no. Negotiating offers an opportunity to understand each other's needs and find a mutually acceptable solution. It may take some creativity and patience to come up with a solution. That solution may or may not involve you (or the other person) changing behaviour.

For example, in this situation, maybe after discussion your roommate agrees to find a food delivery service and you keep doing what you're doing. Or maybe you help your roommate locate a food bank. Through discussing why things are happening and coming to the conversation with an open mind and listening ear, you may discover a way to fix the problem that both of you are happy with.

#dear man skill #dbt #interpersonal skills #my post #bpd skills #actuallybpd

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craycraybluejay · 6 months

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Post was too long for Tumblr so I'm posting it like this

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gent-illmatic · 8 months

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BE MATURE ENOUGH…

To understand that you also have toxic traits! It’s not always solely the other person. The mature understands as long as we have breath in our bodies, we have healing to do. The journey doesn’t end until it all ends.

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goblinofthelaboratory · 3 months

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question about socializing:

i've noticed that when holding a conversation with someone, they usually reply shortly, almost like backchanneling. if i don't continue monologuing, the conversation tends to stop. i try to give hooks, prompts, and questions for the other person to respond to, but this doesn't seem to make a difference, answers are still short and don't provide much to expand on. if i don't talk, little conversation happens. this feels like im making all the effort in the conversation, which is frustrating. i also typically initiate.

Am i just annoying and boring? is there something im missing here? how do i increase engagement?

#questions #please help #social pragmatic communication disorder #socially awkward #socializing #interpersonal relationships #interpersonal skills #interpersonal communication #i dont know what to do #neurodivergent #social rules

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queer-for-science · 1 year

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Don't let anyone guilt trip you into not asking for reciprocity in your social relationships. It is good and healthy and normal to have a give/take on both sides of those interactions. Sometimes it will be more on your end and sometimes it will be more on theirs but you both get to set boundaries around how much you're willing to give without receiving. Every relationship will have times when the social workload is 80/20 or 70/30 instead of 50/50 but that should not be all the time (save for a few exceptions like parent-child relationships or caretaking for someone who cant do so themselves, in which case thats expected and okay). All social animals, humans included, evolved social behavior to take care of each other through reciprocity and that resulted in the love we show each other. Don't settle for relationships that don't show that love.

So if your friends or partners or whatever try to respond to you asking for effort to be put into the relationship with something like "so this is just transactional to you?" Or "so you're only with me if I give you something?" Don't fall for that shit. Because in most cases, yes, it is normal and healthy to ask that our relationships be reciprocal in some way at some point. It is healthy to want love in return for the love you give. And that doesn't make your relationships cold or transactional. It makes you a social animal.

#interpersonal skills #interpersonal communication #interpersonal relationships #mental health recovery #mental health awareness #mental health #healing #self healing

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smeetlinglord · 19 days

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I've grown to stop giving too many fucks away to schmucks on the internet, but not enough outside of it, face-to-face. This is not to say I have undeveloped, poorly developed or even less-than-well developed social navigation skills; instead I mean that I am good, but I want to be really good, perhaps even great with people.

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bigbroadvice · 1 month

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hi! this is perhaps a silly one, but any tips for dealing with anxiety with regards to friendships? to elaborate, i know logically my friends do care about me, and that i care about them, but for some reason the past little while ive been getting mad anxiety spikes about if they really want me around or not. Anyway, since i know deep down this is ridiculous and yet the anxiety remains do you have any tips for getting rid of it? im just concerned that it could end up causing actual problems for the friendships, if that makes sense. Thank you for your time, hope you have a nice day! (also would like to add, my friends are wonderful people and i love them to bits, which is why i care so much about fixing this :))

Hey friend, I’ve struggled with this one too. For me, being open and honest and encouraging others to do so as well is probably the most helpful thing. When I’ve been hanging out for a while with a friend and I start getting worried that maybe they’re tired or kind of need to get to some other things, I ask. And not in a “am I boring you to tears? Are you sick of me?” kind of way that only really gives them one valid option without sounding like an asshole, but in a casual “hey, just checking in. How’s your social battery doing? When do you need to leave by?” kind of way where whatever answer they give, it’s not a reflection of the state of our friendship, it’s just a practical “nah, I don’t have anywhere to be till 9, or yeah, it’s been a long day and I’m kind of spent.”

This kind of thing works pretty well for most anxieties I get about how things are going with friends. Just ask in a way that lets them answer honestly without worrying about hurting your feelings. And yeah, once people get into the practice of really being honest with eachother, occasionally they’ll say a thing that’s kind of makes you feel a bit deflated, but at least now you know and even a dissapointing answer that stings a little is drastically easier to deal with than the billion horror scanarios your brain can come up with to stress over.

If you really can’t stop thinking about it, even after they’ve told you it’s all good, and it’s causing significant anxiety, you may want to get checked out for OCD. A friend of mine has it and this is a thing she deals with a lot where a thought will get stuck in her head and no amount of reassurance can make her stop stressing about it. She has meds and things that help though.

#big bro advice #my friend an I have this maxim that what actually is is never as bad as what could be #because it could be a billion different improbable things #but reality can only be one thing at a time #mental health #friends #ocd #ocd tag #anxiety #friendship #friendship advice #friendship anxiety #interpersonal skills #interpersonal communication #neurodivergent community #communication

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raffaellopalandri · 3 months

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A good leader

Bloganuary writing promptWhat makes a good leader?View all responses Today’s prompt could be used as a main topic for a book, and it also represents one of the most frequent questions I am asked when I support a customer. So, as I take the idea for one of my future books, I will leave you here with a very condensed answer. Photo by Anna Tarazevich on Pexels.com The Enduring Qualities of a…

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#bloganuary #bloganuary-2024-19 #Communication #dailyprompt #dailyprompt-1822 #decision-making #Emotional Intelligence #empathy #Expertise #interpersonal skills #knowledge #Leader #leadership #Raffaello Palandri #skills #Social Intelligence #Strategic Thinking #Strategy #wisdom

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femmefatalevibe · 5 months

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How to stop oversharing?

Slow down: Always pause and think before you speak

Consider anything you share with someone who hasn't earned your complete trust or whom you have a transactional relationship with to be a PSA; Don't trust anything to be confidential with someone you don't fully trust

Reflect on why you overshare in the first place: Do you use it as a tool to soothe social anxiety or pauses in a conversation? Are you lonely or feel like it's a struggle to feel heard/seen/appreciated in your everyday life? Start journaling and/or go to a therapist to work through these very valid emotional wounds

Give yourself a "do's" and "don'ts" list on topics you will and won't discuss at work, different social events, with certain acquaintances, family members, etc., and stick to it

When you feel yourself starting to overshare, take a pause and ask the other person about themselves – it makes you show the other person you're interested in connecting and gives you time to think/reflect on what you should or shouldn't say

Hope this helps xx

#social skills #oversharing #social anxiety #life skills #people skills #meeting new people #work life #social life #new friends #relationship tips #interpersonal skills #interpersonal relationships #self improvement #self reflection #self worth #self awareness #q/a #femmefatalevibe

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explodesyouwithmymind · 3 months

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I miss certain people so bad it's humiliating. It's our own fault they don't want to be around us anymore. The details are fuzzy at this point but I know it's our fucking fault. I miss having people to talk to, and being that kinda close with people. I wish It hadn't taken the complete destruction of the first good relationships we're had in a long time to realize how fucked up we are at safely navigating interpersonal relationships.

#i don't think ill ever not feel guilty about what happened #thinking back on it makes me want to eat my fucking tougue #it also makes me blurry and nauseous #- Aster #this whole post is aster #but whatever #osdd system #osdd #osddid #traumagenic system #system stuff #interpersonal relationships #interpersonal skills #bpd maybe #who fucking knows #vent #vent post #tw vent

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empyllon · 1 year

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Been spending this past month bridging connections and building a competitive esports team from scratch, educating students on methodology and learning.

I've resigned the idea that the grind is truly the one true method on learning skills, so I've conducted interviews with premiership players, looked at adjacent fields with similar concepts and applications. I've then taken these methodologies and taught them to my teammates, factoring in all other methods available.

What I've seen in my research, and in my own students is that they are rapidly improving. I don't yell at them, nor tell them they are bad. I use my available mentors to forward them in learning when errors occur. Lifting them up with praise and making sure any stragglers are caught up to speed.

Yeah sure, some games are considered a dead esport, but sometimes having fun together is what matters most.

I've learned to be more considerate towards people in the process, and I'm working on my leadership skills. Sure they aren't amazing yet, but I never feel I am short of hope for these students of mine.

#team fortress 2 #competitive esports #esports #tf2 medic #tf2 soldier #tf2 6s #etf2l #tf2 scout #tf2 gameplay #tf2 demoman #mentorship #interpersonal skills #team building #competitive games

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positiveupwardspiral · 1 year

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Take a W.I.S.E.R. approach

To help build your relationships with other people, take a ‘W.I.S.E.R.’ approach to problems.

This is Watch, Interpret, Select (a response), Engage, Reflect - taking time to think at each stage of your response.

This can jokingly be described as, ‘Don’t just do something… sit there!’

~ R. Waldinger, Harvard Psychiatrist

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shannaraisles · 6 months

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I have a small thing I would like to say, as someone who is in a loving relationship with a Jew.

I really appreciate that you (gen) want to reach out to the people you know who have a connection with the ongoing conflict, to educate yourself and understand the point of view of someone who is affected by this.

But please, please, ask before bombarding your Jewish/Muslim/Israeli/Palestinian friends with news footage and clips you want to discuss. It is traumatic for anyone to see the images of destruction and terror; doubly so for those who are connected to it from many miles away and will experience bigotry from those in our western societies who have been waiting for an opportunity to threaten and hurt with a spurious excuse.

It doesn’t cost you anything to say “hey, may I show you something/discuss this with you?”, and it allows your friends to defend their boundaries, especially at a time when what is just a news story for most of us is a very deep and personal trauma for others.

Just think before you send that clip or opinion piece - if I was having a bad day, would I react well to seeing this without warning?

#international politics #Israel #Palestine #interpersonal skills

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fortheloveofdeaddove · 9 months

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Oh ho ho, I am NOT happy. But I utilized every single coping technique I know to boost my lousy interpersonal skills and I'm TRYING to move forward.

What a sour taste this has left in my mouth.

It's really hard for my rejection-sensitive, bi-polar ass not to take things like this personally. It's so discouraging. But I hope I did myself and the other party justice. I stood up for myself and didn't condemn the other person.

I gotta say the chemicals my brain produces when I go a-earth saltin' ARE a lot more fun than this. But I do feel confident I did the right thing, and that is almost NEVER the case when I go a-earth saltin'.

#bipolar 2 disorder #interpersonal skills #dbt #mental health

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