#ish i guess they r dating so

[bl00doodle]

DOODELS

#my art #tryignt o do sm shit help i wanma draw and finish things so baddd #the brown sketches r me crying @ the phrase 'to be loved is to be changed' i wanna make a sad emo angsty comic abt shadows loss and pain an #still endong up with a happy life bc. 🧍‍♂️ fuck i want that for myself too #THE 2NDD... MY SKY PIRATE GRANDMA MARIA AU 🫶🫶🫶🫶 basically shes super inspired by dola from castle in thsky lol #shes putting makeup on shad bc hes going on his first date ever.... #in his 50yr immortal ish ageless life hes going on a date and maria will damn sure make sure hes gonna have a nice one #ehehehe guess whos hes going on a date w....👁👁(obvious) #uhhhh the cat is just older blaze leik burnin blaze inspired by her concept art #one of her hair styles is like fire and im like. thats fuckin cool!! #sHE GETS STRIPED AND GETS FWUFFY WHEN SHES OLDER bc i think its kyut 🫶 #makes her related to big the cat ehehehe alt dimension shit or smhtn idk im not thinking anymore #oh fuck i forgot to tag the charas #sonic the hedgehog #maria robotnik #eggman #shadow the hedgehog #blaze the cat #amy rose #sonic chao #uhhh it uink thqts it #sowowiwjekwo #sowwy its a mess

[azulas-lightning-bolt]

uhhh guys I just realized I have a really big problem

I’ve officially oc-ified mako I repeat I have oc-ified mako. it’s happened. do you know how I know this? I drew him (I know, shocker) with grown out-ish hair and a lightning scar on his face. HE DOESNT EVEN LOOK LIKE CANON MAKO ANYMORE BESIDES HIS DUMB EYEBROWS HELP

I genuinely cannot escape this goofy ass orphan.

anyway here’s a list of mako hcs (under the cut)

gets called pretty boy four hundred thousand times a day and bolin makes fun of him for it because he’s a big scary police officer who gets flirted with by criminals he brought in. and I know I have it in the tags of some old post somewhere but bolin got called champ by a girl he was on a date with once and mako absolutely used that against him in retaliation

he’s shy but not in the nervous around people way. he’s shy in the awkward really intense eye contact because he doesn’t want to sound weird when he talks way. if he didn’t have extrovert guidance counselor bolin he would just never speak to anyone

i also firmly believe he is either mildly autistic or has severe anxiety (he’s me)

he cries once a year (exactly 365 days apart) at exactly four o’clock on the hour and has done this since he was ten.

remember that one episode where mako was like ‘where’s chief beifong’ ‘are you okay chief you’ve been asleep for sixteen hours’ and ‘chief is really good at her job the city’s lucky to have her’ on zaofu. pretty sure it was ‘old wounds’? that’s how he is all the time. he says chief at least 463 times an hour and a month into working at the station people just give mako an update on the chief as soon as he walks up to them. she’s his mom your honor. tenzin is always fighting demons when he sees mako look at lin like she’s his mom and she’s like. chill with it. he’s like ain’t NO way. basically mako gets one female figure of authority in his life and immediately latches onto her as a mother figure. lin is grudgingly accepting because he’s kind of pathetic and sad looking (he reminds her of herself)

he’s transmasc. I don’t make the rules (I do in fact make the rules)

as you know from that one post, mako is absolutely a great chef.

I think he’d either be a charcoal artist or a really good writer. only charcoal artist, but he would do all kinds of writing—short stories, novels, poetry, journalism, whatever. he’d occupy himself on late nights he couldn’t fall asleep on an empty stomach with made up stories and he just started to get really good. but he also hasn’t gone to school since he was eight so he’d get frustrated if he doesn’t know the word for something. if he drew it would be hyperrealistic portraits (he’s trying to remembers his parents’ faces)

kind of related to that but I think mako loves reading/writing but is a natural math genius.

I know I’m a little insane about, like, character parallels but I just KNOW katara sees herself in mako.

so azula is my all time fav girl right. so she and mako both generally maintain a good poker face or a facade that masks genuine constant rage right. (just agree with me) but at the end of atla. azula’s breakdown. now, now hear me out. mako->azula style breakdown when he finally loses his shit. he’s just so girl coded and azula’s rage seems so. fitting for him I guess. it’s also the inherent feminine anger of firebending I guess? I’ll explain that one later. probably. hopefully. I have so many posts I’m planning to write oh my god.

korrasami r still in love with him and they all get together post canon 😋🤞🏼

HETEROCHROMIA!!! idc if it’s central or in each eye but that man has one gold/brown and one green eye.

the mako in my head also looks a lot more like bolin—and bolin might have some of the more angular fn features as well to balance them out and make them look like, yk, actual mixed kids.

that’s probably it for now but by god if I don’t update this list

#atla #avatar the last airbender #mako lok #legend of korra #mako #mako tlok #headcanon #chief beifong #katara #azula #bolin #slug’s stuff

[echo-bleu]

Anyway I'm switching between WIPs every five seconds and struggling to write anything, but the most active one at the moment is a Silm Mutant AU.

Not a mindblowing concept or anything, especially since I tend to lean more toward mutants-as-oppressed-and-disabled-people than mutants-as-superheroes, but mutant AUs is just something I keep coming back to, I guess.

So it's a modern-ish AU, everyone lives in a version of Beleriand. Mutant are known to all and pretty openly discriminated against. Fingolfin is head of the Noldor School for Gifted Youngsters (or something like that, I didn't properly name it) in Hithlum and the younger generation are in their twenties or teens. Fëanor fell out with Fingolfin years ago and took his family to Hithrim, where they started an extremist mutant faction.

Maedhros and Fingon kept in touch and have been meeting whenever they could and dating. Maedhros's mutation is fire lighting and manipulation, a weaker version of his father's extremely powerful energy manipulation ability. Fingon has Cyclops-style uncontrolled blasts coming out of his eyes. He has to constantly wear a mask to keep his eyelids close, as they're the only thing stopping the blasts, so he's functionally blind.

Maedhros, while on a mission for his father, is captured by the ultra-powerful anti-mutant Morgoth Corp. Its Head of R&D, Mairon, has been trying to get his hands on a Fëanorian for years to study their mutations. Maedhros is experimented on at Morgoth Corp's headquarters Angband for months, with everyone powerless to get him out.

Until Caranthir manages to get a rough location on him and Fingon, impulsive, terrified Fingon, goes in blasting hot (literally) and basically razes Angband to the ground in his effort to rescue Maedhros, something no one else would have dared. He finds Maedhros chained by the wrist with an adamantium cuff, and he is forced to blast his hand off to free him.

They are rescued by a mysterious man in a helicopter named Thorondor, who says he comes from the almost legendary Free Mutant State of Aman.

The part I'm currently writing is set about a year later, when Fingon is kidnapped out of his bed by Curufin and Ambarussa and finds himself in Hithrim, having lost all contact with Maedhros since the rescue.

Here's a snippet:

“So, you had your underage brothers break into the school and kidnap me,” he summarizes, “because you want to help me with my mutation? Is your father aware of this?” “Don’t be ridiculous,” Curufin scoffs. “Excuse me? I’m being ridiculous? Is Maedhros aware of this, then?” “No. I’m sure he will be once he gets up, though.” So Fëanor is probably not there, but Maedhros is. “How is he?” Fingon asks softly. Curufin hesitates. “Better. Most of the time.” There’s another silence while Fingon tries to wrap his head around that. What does better even mean? It’s been a year—an entire year of no contact. And before that… “He’ll be glad to see you, I think,” Curufin says quietly. Fingon takes a breath. Then another.

There. This is my new year's resolution to chat freely about my WIPs on here, I guess.

#echo's writing thoughts #silm mutant au #russingon #maedhros #fingon #ngl this feels weird #i don't know how to do this #it's easier when it's small canon divergences not a full on au

[catb-fics]

US shows were probably booked by December ‘23. Shows have to be booked 9-ish months in advance and to my understanding a few already are. I have my suspicions based on limited smaller venue openings in LA and NYC. Alsooo I have my suspicions of a Toronto show as part of the NA tour. Booking agents almost exclusively say “U.S.” if it’s only American shows and NA if Canada is included and in Marty’s email he mentioned North American dates.

Can’t confirm or deny anything about the Sam Fender thing but it’s been talked about among people I trust. It’s actually a possibility. I wouldn’t be surprised at this point if it happened. I swear @vanmccannsfridge tweeted about suspecting Sam knowing something a while ago. Guess we’ll see 👀 - 🌴

I guess they’ll be announced really soon then if they are already booked. I hope so 🤞🤞

I could see them releasing dates when they release new music like they did for Showtime.

If Sam Fender comes out on stage for R&L I will know for sure I’ve slipped into some kind of weird and wonderful alternate reality 😂

#catb asks #🌴 anon

[faerieismm]

blooming panic x male reader headcanons?????!?!??!?!??!?!!? pls

HELLO GAYS!!! WELCOME TO THE SHITSHOW, GLAD TO HAVE YOU :} I AM DEEPLY HONORED TO BE JOINED BY MY FELLOW LGBTQ+ FELLAS<333 UR HEADCANONS COMING RIGHT UP☝️☝️

bloomic mains with a male reader<3

tw: none!

genre: fluff??? , humor, lil suggestive ish at times

type of writing: headcanons

well its canon theyre all pansexual, so i definitely think they’d all be open to dating a guy :)

(obv, but i just wanted to get that out of the way)

i mean these men and enby are all fruity as hell

like they would treat it like such a normal thing

“you have a boyfriend? omg congrats gay.”

anyways, i shall now be going by all the mains~

quest

big strong hubby that can envelop you with his body and crush your head with his thig-

carrying you? yes

your personal body guard

very VERY protective of you

BUT WILL ALSO FLAUNT YOU TO ANYONE

doesnt matter who literally

“this is my bf everybody :}” *insert gentle giant voice*

nakedtoaster

you better be a gAmErbOy cuz thats what you gonna do all night

sometimes they will just slump themselves over you and you’d be buried in nakedtoaster

“babe come to bed.”

“nO!”

always blushing around you

fr they can’t believe they’ve found such a cute guy and you’re all theirs🥹

i hope you’ve got muscle because this enby has none 😃

there they stand, pot of pickles in hand

they slowly turn their head around with a pout

“hELp.”

busy bee but will always make time for their favorite boi<3

nightowl

cuddles~~

and he’s so flirty with u too😭

also now he’s finally obtained a boyfriend he’s gonna make ALOT of d1ck jokes

possessive asf but i think we all could’ve guessed

“gonna - smooch - mark my - smooch - pretty boy with - smooochhhh - hICKIESS~~~”

showing you off eVERYWHERE

E V E R Y W H E R E.

xyx

xyx strikes me as the hAahHhahaha GAYYYY type

just as a joke tho, he loves his boyfriend <33

teasing eheh

also in the bedroom

going on motor rides together

i imagine him being so chill about everything

“hi yes this is my boyfriend.”

hopes he makes you feel comfortable <3

ESPECIALLY if its your first relationship with a guy

many many many many gay jokes

every opportunity he gets

he takes

HI YES HELLO SO I HAVENT PLAYED BLOOMIC IN SO LONG SO IM SORRY IF ITS A BIT OOC BUT I TRIED!!! HOPE YALL ENJOYED AND PLEASE STAY GAYS PLZ I BEG OF U

yours sincerely,

#bloomic #blooming panic #nightowl blooming panic #quest blooming panic #bp xyx #bp quest #bp nightowl #xyx blooming panic #nakedtoaster #bp nakedtoaster

[late-to-the-fandom]

which obscure Media would u recommend to another empty fandom collector such as yourself?

You ask an intriguing question! I mean, there is so just so much to choose from and I have no idea where your interests lie to guide you better. So here are all the tiny fandoms I am proud to have been too late to join or remain the only member of (in a variety of media):

-The Engineer Trilogy is a book series by KJ Parker that has, as far I know, no fandom at all. It’s just me and a thousand fic ideas I will never really finish because no one will ever read them. Which is a shame because the series really lends itself to fanfiction (literally every single character is a poor little meow meow). But despite having no fandom, these books are probably objectively some of the best, most ambitious books ever written and the reason I maintain that the best books are never appreciated in their time.

-Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell by Susanna Clarke is the other best book of all time that I can’t get anyone to read because they’re just not ready. It at least has a small fandom because they made a BBC miniseries of it a few years ago that was actually quite decent and had the added benefit of casting some very attractive actors. Definitely worth a watch and if you like it, 100% worth the read (this book is my Bible)

-Laurie R. King, the Patron Saint of fanfiction, whose Sherlock Holmes and Mary Russell series survived the great Mary Sue hate of the late 90s early 00s, and who is actually a wonderful author in her own right. She used to have her own very small fandom site where people posted fanfiction and art but not nearly enough and it’s not active (at least that I can tell; I came in - you guessed it - late)

-Deadwood, that will always be one million times better than Game of Thrones to me, never had the fandom Ian McShane it deserved. Again, late so idk if there was a lot going on for it at the time but it certainly didn’t leave behind much fanfic for us stragglers

-Labyrinth, which I hesitate to include here because its not obscure and truly does have an insane amount of fanfiction but its fandom is mostly old (like me) and inactive (tell me I’m wrong and point me in the right direction!). Probably because the movie isn’t very popular anymore. However, it’s a great example of a tiny half-dead fandom with more fanfiction than it knows what to do with (even I haven’t read through it all).

-Watchmen (the graphic novel, NOT the new series). This did get a nice little surge of fans with the movie that came out and was probably the only time in my life I was there waiting for it. Ah the glory days of soaking up Rorschach/Night Owl fanfics on the ground as they came out… but it’s dead now, the book very close to cancelled and the fans mostly in hiding. There’s still a good bit of great fic out there if you love angsty slash pairings

-and last but not least, if you’re interested in random fandom-light video games, I can recommend several World of Warcraft fanfics that are absolutely lovely (and only some of them are mine 😅). I write for one minor-ish character in a now out-of-date expansion, as do @shipping-through-eternity and @mousterian-writes and @mysdrym to name a few. But all of it is lovely in their own different styles and genres, so if you have need of a dying video game fandom in your life I highly recommend!

Let me know if any of that helps, or if you have any recommendations of your own!

[shopcat]

how do you feel about transfem steve in general? I admit as a transfem-ish nb person myself I really enjoy projecting myself onto Steve but I mostly have to restrict myself to enjoying art and my friends creations because so much of it is like. the extreme of the baby girl twink bottom boy waif steve fetishization trend to eddies bad boy s&m gay sex master. it's like people can't acknowledge that mlm in the 80s could be gnc and not transfem, and that steve could retain his personality and not be a blushing virginal archetype the minute he puts on some makeup

OH in general i think it's awesome like Fuck Yes transgender right. i love the idea and i love all trans hcs but especially for steve and i think it's also really cool that a lot of people do like it because in my experience in the past people r far more unreceptive out of just like transmisogyny.. :( like it's cool how open people are TO the idea it's just sometimes the idea sucks ass when someone is doing it with ill intention or ignorance 😭

i've talked about this a little i honestly think 😭 there is just a huge problem with casual transmisogyny in the st fandom and it's dressed up as like, inclusivity?? bc it will not be outright blatant bigotry it's the weird insidiously needling things or like, genuine fetishisation or like that weird shit where people have eddie say transfem steve is his "exception" but he's gay (when eddie is not ... gay. so they're making him gay to insert this weird roadblock and it comes off uncomfortable it is not as coolpillbasedawesome as people assume it is... sexuality can be fluid and change especially in the wake of gender and identity shifting and growing with a relationship but people can't actually apply that needed depth and complexity in a 30 word wordcount lame headcanon post or 2 second comic it just comes off that eddie sees her as a boy or otherwise invalidating tbh!!). and tbh one of the largest aspects from my perspective at least of the reason the hc became popular over on st twitter is because the nsfw artists got really into the "trend" just making blatant trans fetish content as people will Always do but like god that's just depressing 😭😭 that it was even called a trend is concerning in the first place to be honest but i guess that's just a semantics thing..

and yeah i think ur absolutely right :0 i think one time i said um like it's really clear when people who are making this harmful content (albeit out of ignorance and not malicious intention) will be doing it as an extension of steve being the ultimate subby blushing baby girl and if the starting line for a trans headcanon is someone's FEMINISATION KINK that's just plain concerning :( going hand in hand with shipping her with robin i think it's just fucking weird to go as far as you can to try and get stobin to date and they're always making her a trans girl TO date robin as the crux of it and never ... just to be a person. with autonomy. then they think it's like awesome and validating her gender because robin sees her as a woman but like ?? 😭 why wouldn't she. i don't know it's just weird to me to use robin's sexuality as a prop like that on top of the fact it implies robin's sexuality is "in the way" of them having feelings for each other... yuck. like even if i understand the angle to go against what a lot of tma people have spoken out against (the... iffiness of headcanoning a male character as a trans girl from the perspective of a tme person no matter their intention) to specifically do that to those two in particular is so STRANGE and then every single time someone goes this is weird they're like "well you just think robin wouldn't date her cuz she's not a real girl" like omg you're soooo stupid like rocks in your fucking brain. even if steve was a cis girl they wouldn't date also why r they never going Yesss transfem nancy or vickie or fucking chrissy or whoever they ship her with now like it's TRANSPARENT. anyway.

other than that i think it's a really fun & cool thing !!! :) if they're made responsibly especially if like you said it comes from a place of empathetic projection let alone from someone actually transfem it's so fun & cool i honestly think a big problem IS that tme people are spearheading it and end up perpetuating harmful ideals and honestly as one myself i don't even know if i can identify it all but i try my best to at least be like Hey guys... 😭. but it sucks when something fun so connected w peoples irl identities and senses of selves like that is taken by fandom and like strangled to death U_U. i have a lot of free floating little steve's in my mind and i really i suppose enjoy..? both the transmasc and transfem experience 4 him i can see it in both ways and it rules + with the stipulation that like. transfem ofc doesn't equal binary trans it's just a sweeping term or that all tma people ARE transfem etc etc so he is transfem a lot of the time just by virtue of it and It Rules. it rules. honestly this answer ended up more airing my frustrations again i'm sorry 😭😭 Basically i love transfem steve in all manner of expression... from genderfluidity to bigender identity to he/she realness to the outright trans girl coolness and i also love seperately from that hc him being just a little fun with it like u said. gnc steve one of the most beautiful things in the world. insert a how i look with he/him in my bio picture here.

#asks #honestly maybe i'm just seeing all the lame stuff i dunno :( #i think from the census of my mind most people tend for the generally nonbinary hc for him then anything outright transfem then eveyrhing #else which is cool actually. i'm not making a statement or anything here i just think it's cool it's popular LOL #sorry if i've overstepped or anything by the way i have just been feeling truly awful about the state of the World on here lately #and i think it goes without saying i would rather claw my own trachea out than intentionally ignore things i notice like this bc like #i dunno not that no one else is saying it cuz they are it's just how is it still HAPPPEENINGGGG . i want all my transfem friends and #girlfriends and wifes to be Experience life as awesome eben in . strangest things #sts

[crazyoffher]

no yeah thank you!! :) ofc I don’t mind if it’s not exactly the day lol I didn’t give a date (mostly for that reason)

let’s dooo smut cuz birthday woohoo I guess lol and have you any thought for babygirl!jenna? clingy, bratty, possessive, yandere, yk how it is. also top!reader, only jenna receiving pls. if you’re amenable to the idea !!

(I’m turning 21, and I’m kind of dreading it for various reasons. so thanks again <3)

⭐️

it’s no problem, i suck at exact dates on posting hence the estimates LMFAO so i appreciate you for that!

clingy, bratty, possessive, yandere — i can only assume you have a type? 😉 i’ll definitely try my hardest to come up with a scenario where i can fit those before and during the smut, but considering i’ve never really written anything yandere-ish, i might not be able to fit that part into the story and i’m sorry for that :(

top!r and bottom!j coming right up 🫡 (turning 21 is a pretty big deal!!! i don’t know why you’re dreading it nor will i ask because it’s most likely personal, but don’t let that dread take away from your special day) :)

#n’s asks #⭐️

[allen-san]

Beaucoup d'entre vous, comme moi je pense, ignorez la complète existence de ce One-shot de Hoshino, je l'ai découvert il y à plusieurs Mois de ça ( et j'en parle que maintenant je sais XD ) et il date de 2012 environ ^^  http://c.tieba.baidu.com/p/2127644349#!/l/p1#=_= ( lien RAW ) Jusqu'à maintenant, personne n'en à fait un trad en Français mais une personne à écrit la trad en Anglais, bonne lecture :

Cover: One is a Kaijin. Both are Heroes!?

Page 1

Master: Hahahaha!!!

Fallen soldier: Gu...

Fallen soldier: Damn...you...

Text box: Japan, a place where many evil organisations are born and every conceivable atrocity is committed!!

Box: The police forces that should've been holding them back have long been paralyzed.

Box: And several decades have passed.

Master: Ginza District 3 Squadron is no longer our enemy!!

Master: Hearing the panicked cries of the people of Japan is our ecstasy!!!

Below: Evil organisation: Gamshack.

Page 2

Underling: Master, what should we do with them?

Master: Fuhahahahaha. Write some embarrassing doodles on them and leave them dangling from the old Hattori Clock Tower.

Master: Now, my cute Kaijin, let the name Gamshack resound even louder throughout the world!

Master: The Sky Tree will be the next to fall!!!

Piropaya: Master.

Shouts in the background: Gamshack! Gamshack! Hail the Master!

Master: Yes, what is it...

Master: ...Piropaya, one of Gamshack's Big Four?

Piropaya (P): Here.

Shouts in the background: Piro-sama, I love you! Piro!

Page 3

Letter: Letter of resignation.

P: Thank you for everything.

P: I don't wanna do bad things anymore.

P: I'm going to switch jobs and become a Hero of Justice instead ♡

Page 4

Box: The local residents rose to their feet to defend themselves...

Box: ...And created their own defence force: Squadron!

Box: We are now in Kameari, District Katsushika.

P: Nakagawa District 5 Squadron "Go Queen" rejected me too...

P: And now...

P: I don't have any money left. I can't even go by train anymore. I guess I'll have to go on foot now.

P: Let's see... What other Hero vacancies are left...

P: ...

P: Uhmm.

P: Huh?

Page 5

Kid: Stop, you asshole!

Kid: Give back Sachiko's lunch money!

Kid: Bastard. How dare you steal money from an elementary school kid!?

Kid: Dirt-poor Kaijin!

Kaijin: Get lost! Get lost! A brat shouldn't have the nerve to walk around with 3000 yen anyway, pe!!!

P: (There are none left...!?)

P: (What the hell? No, don't tell me...)

P: (Complete wipe-out!!??)

P: ....Ah.

P: Haa....

Box: Eye octopus Kaijin: Tsuruko.

Tsuruko (T): Pi-

T: Piro-shama!

T: Cheer up!

T: There have to be shome imbeciles out there who can shee Piro-shama's brilliance!!

P: Haaa...

Page 6

P: Y-you're right.

T: I ahm!

P: Master would laugh at me for getting depressed over such little things, wouldn't he?

P: I'll do my best.

Kid: Give it back!

Kaijin: Get lost! Get lost!

Kaijin: Move it!

Kaijin: If you don't...

Kaijin: ...I will run you...

Kaijin: ...Down!

Page 7

Kaijin: !?

Red ®: .....Ah.

R: M-my... h-h... hat...

Kid: Huh? That Kaijin asshole was sent flying!

Kid: Ah. That girl! Watch out!

Page 8

R: Over there...

R: That's where Reiko-sama's statue is...

P: ...Even so...

P: ...They tell me “You'll be badly received if your chest is too big” or “You have to be a size S.”

Text above Piro: Size L

P: Are looks really that important if you want to be a Hero?

P: It's hard for Pink (female) Hero's these days...

T: What ish good about having a figure that looksh like dried squid anyway!?

T: Those imbeciles' interests are a mystery to ush Kaijin!

T: Piro-shama, you musht be tired from having to shleep outside all the time.

T: Hey, Piro-shama, why don't we go back to the hideout and ask Master for shome pocket money?

P: No, Tsuruko.

P: I don't want to depend on Master anymore.

P: I want to do things on my own...

Page 9

P: ...And find someone who truly needs me.

P: Huh?

R: No good!!

R: My clothes are causing wind resistance.

R: I'll be 0.05 seconds too late.

R: It'll be bad if he hits her!!

R: Reiko-san!!!

Page 10

R: CHANGE!!

Page 11

Kaijin: ....Ugh....

Kaijin: Y-you are....?

Kid: Give back the money! You, you...

Kid: Idiiiot! Idiiiot!

Kid: Morooon! Morooon!

T: P-piro-shama!

T: Blazhing hair...

T: A tight-fitting outfit...

T: Flashy, wild red... could it bhe...!?

Page 11

(The star of Hero Squadron...)

(...Red!!)

R: ....D-damn!

Page 12

R: (I got too worked up about Reiko-sama (statue) and accidently transformed.)

Citizen: What, what?

Citizen: It's a Hero?

Citizen: A Hero?

Citizen: Where's he from?

R: I'm.. standing out...

Box: This is bad...

Kid: You really helped us out, buddy.. .

Box: ...I'm drawing attention.

Box above the kids' heads: Red's inner vision.

Kid: No, not "buddy", it's "Hero", right?

Kid: What Squadron are you from, Red? I've never heard of you before.

Kid: Thank you, Hero.

Kid: Us Hero fans not knowing you means you must be a from a newbie Squadron.

Kid: I see. If you were from a popular Squadron I'd want your autograph, but knowing your name is enough. Tell us.

Page 13

Box: There it is.

Kid: From what city is your newbie Squadron?

Box: I'm not a newbie though.

Kid: Wheeere?

Box: Also, I'm from this city.

Kid: I'm a huge fan of Oshiage District 1 Squadron's Sky Tree Rangers but I'll support your Squadron a little bit!

P: .....!

P: A new Squadron?

Box: C-c-c-c-calm down!!

Box: They're not really interested. They're just curious and just want something to post on their blogs and twitter accounts.

Box: Yeah, that's it. That has to be it!!

Box: Go with the flow of being noticed, get cocky and give your name!

Box: But some nerd will look me up on the Internet and write stuff without my permission, divulging all kinds of things from my past!!

Kid: Hey!

Box: But, but... if I don't say my name, won't they think I'm a jerk!?

Kid: Look over here!

Page 14

Box: Even so.. they might look me up on the Internet....

Kid: Your – Na – Me.

Box: They're on me.

Box: Those eyes.

Box: N-n-n-no!

Box: If they focus even more on me...

Kid: Maybe you don't have a name...

Kid: Because your Squadron hasn't debuted yet!?

Page 15

P: This battle suit!

P: I've never seen it before!

P: Which means I haven't applied to your Squadron yet!?

P: I wanna...

P: I wanna...

P: Become...

P: A...

P: Hero!

Page 16

Box: ----No...

Box: It's no use...

Page 17

Kid: Waa!

Kid: W-what?

Kid: An explosion?

Kid: Where did the attack come from?

P: ...No.

P: He...

P: ...Self-destructed,

P: Right?

Kid: ------

Kid: Why?

Page 18

Kid: I dunno what happened...

Kid: But that's so lame....

Kazuyo: Huh?

Kazuyo: Wait a minute!

Kazuyo: That's Koutarou, isn't it!?

Co-worker: This isn't working out.

Co-worker: Do you know how troublesome it is for us when you self-destruct on the battlefield and can't fight anymore?

Co-worker: No matter how strong you are... You can't use the 5-member-combo killer move.

Co-worker: Pink covered for you and got seriously injured.

Page 19

R: S-s-sorry.

R: I...

R: I can't hold it back... When there are citizens around...

R: B-b-b-b-b-b-b-but...

R: I definitely won't self-destruct the next time, so...

Co-worker: (.... What a pain.)

R: ....

R: ...Eh?

Co-worker: You're the face of the Squadron, you're the leader.

Co-worker: To be blunt, that whatever-it's-called disease of yours...

Co-worker: ...Makes you unfit to be a Hero.

Co-worker: We're going to join a different Squadron.

Co-worker: Sorry,

Co-worker: But if we stay here, we can never do anything.

Co-worker: You know, Red...

Co-worker: Have you ever looked us in the eye...

Co-worker: And talked to us...

Co-worker: Even once?

Page 20

P: Tamada Aquinas Sporadic Hero Hyper Self-Consciousness Syndrome?

P: What a long name for a disease.

Kazuyo (K): Isn't it? I heard it's an extremely rare disease that only effects Hero's.

K: There are only 9 people in the world suffering from it!

K: Wondering how the people he has to protect think about him and view him....

K: It causes extreme anxiety about whether someone is fit to be a Hero, and also causes high stress levels and status ailments.

K: His disease is like that.

Box: A Kameari resident: Kazuyo-obachan. (* oba-chan = used to address an older lady)

K: This boy is Red Koutarou from the Kameari North Entrance Shopping District Squadron, but you've probably never heard of him, right?

K: He can't fight in crowded places due to his disease.

K: A lot of the people here don't know him either.

K: Right? Koutarou!

R: ....Please don't rattle on about other people's secrets, obachan.

P: Uhm, why do continue you work as Hero...

P: If it gives you so much trouble?

Page 21

R: No particular reason.

R: I was raised here so I want to protect this place.

K: Kameari Avenue Shopping District Squadron "Kaiten Five"!!

P: ? What's Kaiten?

K: It means to get back your fighting spirit,

K: To liven up!

P: Waa! That's a really pretty name!!

P: Ah.

P: But...

P: I was convinced his Squadron hadn't debuted yet.... (embarrassing...)

K: Well, it's nearly the same.

K: Blue and the others have already left. Koutarou is the only one left.

P: Huh?

R: (I told you not to rattle on.)

K: By the way, your name is Piropaya-chan, right?

K: Aren't you getting tired?

K: Should I carry him?

P: No need.

P: I'm totally fine. After all...

P: I'm a Kaijin.

T: Piro-shama is shuper strong.

Page 22

R: K-Kaijin?

P: Yes.

R: You're a Kaijin?

R: Doesn't that make you a bad guy?

Text above Kazuyo: That octopus wasn't a stuffed toy? Waa, I'm shocked.

P: No.

P: I left the organization for personal reasons.

K: ...

K: Ah.

K: I see.

K: (!!)

R: Whoa!

K: I-If that's true, then, Piropaya-chan,

K: Won't you join our Squadron!?

P: ....Huh?

R: W-w-what are you saying, obachan?!

K: It's fine, isn't it? My shop is your sponsor after all.

Page 23

K: It'll be alright if it's you!

K: Koutarou's disease plays up around the citizens he has to protect and around his fellow Squadron members...

K: But he's ridiculously unaffected by enemy Kaijin.

K: I see!

K: Why didn't I think of it before?

K: That boy is already strong on his own...

K: But it's kind of pathetic to be a Squadron with only one member.

K: I scouted for so many people and I had simply given up...

K: But, of course! I can just gather Kaijin!!

R: Wai-- Obachan.

P: It's okay if I...?

K: Shut up already. You were able to talk with Piro-chan just fine a while ago, weren't you?

R: Eh? Huh..?

P: You...

P: Need me...!?

Page 24

P: I'm so happy, Kazuyo-obasama!

T: Thank yhou, imbecile!!

K: There, there!

R: Wai-

R: Wait a minute...

R: S-she might be a Kaijin...

R: But she's still cut--

R: Cute!

R: That's...

R: It doesn't just...

R: ...Make it oka---

K: Alright. We've arrived, Piropaya-chan!!!

K: This is the headquarters and sponsor shop of the Kaiten Five,

K: Soba-shop Kaiten!!

T: It ish a tiny shop!

Page 25

K: Come in! Come in!

R: O...

R: You're just gonna ignore me?

K: Darling!

K: A new Kaiten Pink has arrived!

P: Koutarou-sama.

P: I'm still a newbie,

P: But as Kaiten Pink,

P: I look forward to working with you.

Page 26

R: I really...

R: Can't..

P: Huh?

T: Ish that guy alright...?

Box: The Sky Tree towers over the neighbourhood.

Box: Someday,

Box: The fearsome Gamshack and this small Squadron will clash head to head,

Box: But that's another story.

R: Legendary policeman, Ryoutsu Kankira-san,

R: I wanna be like you....

P: Who is that?

(Note: Ryoutsu Kankira is the lead character of the manga Kochira Katsushika-ku Kameari Kouen Mae Hashutsujo)

Voilà et si le coeur vous en dit, n'hésitez pas à tenter de le traduire ^^ Et en cas, je pourrais tenter de passer ce texte sur Gogole translate ^^ ( ou pas XD )

#d.gray-man #hoshino katsura #manga

[187days]

Day Fifty-Five

It snowed for real this morning, so we had a two-hour delay, which caused all kinds of chaos because we were in the middle of NWEA testing, it was supposed to be picture retake day, etc, etc... But I still thought it was awesome. Delays don’t have to be made up like snow days do, I got to chill at home until 9:00AM-ish and watch Twoset Violin’s concert stream (which was a glorious way to start my day), and then I got to go to work in jeans and one of my college t-shirts for I Am Collegebound/I Applied. This is a uniquely NH thing: seniors can apply to NH colleges for free, there’s a big to-do in the library, lots of celebration. We all wear our college gear to go with the vibes, I guess? I’m all about it because it’s comfortable. 

I did test review with my GOV students, who were unsurprisingly much more vocal at 9:30 than they are at 7:30, so that was good. Then I supervised book paper drafting in World, and ended up spreading a lot of joy by extending the due date. Rough drafts were supposed to be do at the end of class today, but I noticed a lot of my Block 2 students were behind (mostly because they’d gotten stuck, but didn’t want to ask for help getting unstuck), so I asked if they needed another day to draft. The answer was an emphatic yes, so I just said, “Okay, let’s dot that, then.” I think most of them would have been able to finish today, but taking the pressure off changed the whole mood in the room. They were so happy after that. And my Block 3 students were happy when I announced the new deadline to them, too. So I think it was the right decision- and it’s not like it was a difficult one for me to make, my lesson planning is never that rigid- because, obviously, I’d rather have happy students than stressed and frustrated ones.

A number of them did submit drafts for me to look at today, so I proofread them and left feedback during my prep time. I did a bit of planning, too, for some upcoming lessons in both World and GOV. And, since my prep time, like everything else today, was about twenty minutes shorter than usual, the time passed quickly. I walked out with Mr. F and Mrs. R at the end of the day, and we were chatting about the students we have in common, but it’s bitterly cold, so once we exited the building we hurried off to our cars!

#teaching #teacher #teachblr #edublr #educhums #education #social studies #delayed start #Mr. F #Mrs. R #day fifty five

[ajcgames]

Smashing

I got a good bit of development time in since the last update. There's a bunch to unpack, so let's start off with a video that shows what's new.

A lot to cover here!

Pulverizer

A replacement for the first 'work machine', and the first proper machine you'll likely place in your factory. As you can guess, the pulverizer breaks down raw minerals into processed components. In the video, you can see it turning the small rocks into containers of granulated product.

Machine indicator lights

The machines you place down now have indicator lights. You can see this on the front of the excavator and the top of the pulverizer. These are unified and share the same meaning across all machines. RED = an input is not connected. YELLOW = the machine is unable to work, usually due to a blocked output slot. GREEN = the machine is busy working, all is well!

Camera movement updates

I added a somewhat superfluous zoomed-in mode to the camera, mostly for the sake of giving you the opportunity to get in close to the action. There's a more zoomed-out version as well that gives you a more top-down look at your factory, though I haven't shown this in the video.

Input port details

When you're placing an Excavator you'll now see UI panels over the ports in the level. These tell you the product that will be imported through that port.

Naming of stuff

When I was working on the import panel I realised I needed to give my first input product a name. I went with Akorite since it's not a real mineral name and I can avoid having to ground this game with real stuff! I want to keep to real-ish sounding names, though, so you won't see any Unobtanium in here ;)

The next steps

I'm getting very close to something that feels more like a vertical slice of the game now, so I need to start thinking about the next big objectives. I'm really happy with how it's coming together so far, but I want to make sure I'm sticking to my lane and focusing on concrete goals.

Now that I have mechanisms in place for generating items, moving them around, and performing work on them (to produce an additional ouput), I have all of the 'bare bones' mechanics to build up a proper factory game. There are some developments that are more obvious than others:

Addition of belt splitters and mergers

A UI that shows when clicking on a machine which displays relevant information about its state and current processes

A machine that generates science points by researching items you feed into it (a little bit like the Satisfactory Awesome Sink)

A way to save and load your game

Beyond these, which I feel are essential requirements for it to be a functional 'game', I might consider these are additional development objectives:

A mission objectives system. This may initially just be 'accrue X science points' until a deeper contract-based system is developed.

A player tutorial system. This will likely take place in a pre-made small factory level where I can more tightly control the environment. Like setting up 'bumpers' in a bowling alley to keep the player on-track.

Research screen.

The concept of a research screen is just that for now - a screen. I want to get it in there as a placeholder soon just so that I have it hooked up and ready to work on at a later date.

The R&D tree is going to be an essential component for me to implement as it would feel totally lacking without the regular portioning of rewards to the player. It creates impetus and drive.

I'll be spending some time thinking it all over to try and come up with something as compelling as I can :)

Anyway, that's all again for now. Thank you again if you took the time to read this, I'm grateful for your time. Have a wonderful day! ❤️

#indie games #game development #game dev blog #gamedev #automation #factory game

[totallyofficialtacobell]

heyo i'm here to collect your info for the website! all are optional :3

Any names you use

Any corpverse relatives

Affiliation in the corp/gimmickverse (Such as browsers)

Occupation (Such as shitposter)

Your character's date of birth

Your character's place of birth

Your character's species

Character's Gender

Character's Height

Any major events within the corpversepersonalityappearanceany other lore

Any photos you'd like on your page! these r superhelpful for breaking text up

-@the-corporation-information-blog (@unity-real mod)

Ok I’m gonna try to organize by bullet so bear with me

Taco bell

homeless and up for adoption (someone please be related to me please)

Idk what this means but I think I was on th ikea side when there was a war that one time

Shitposting is a hobby, Taco Bell works at Taco Bell because I’m not creative and I think they’re a pretty on the nose kinda person

September 28th (same as me because once again I’m not creative)

New Mexico because I have no clue where Taco Bell was founded but New Mexico sounds about right

human (subject to change)

He/they pronouns

I’m gonna stick a full physical description on this one because I can’t draw. Short, (5’4” ish), black hair, bit of a beard but not much. Disgruntled little guy who can pretty much only be found working the window at Taco Bell and being relatively bored at all times. Very friendly though, and loves to talk to people who are interested in talking to them.

I think I mentioned the ikea war where I sided with ikea, umm I don’t have much lore but I’m working on building some. He’s bisexual and since he has no relatives or confirmed relationships in the corpverse I guess he’s a sibling-less single orphan with no friends and no family so that would be lore I suppose, he loves Baja blast it’s their favorite flavor of everything and he offers Baja blast to people in order to befriend them on occasion. An awkward little guy, but if you go out of your way to talk to him he’ll love you forever

#gimmick blog #baja blasted #Website I guess #I still don’t know what this website is

[feuqueerfire]

February 2024 Movies/Shows Wrap-Up

A little monthly (spoilery!) wrap-up of all the shows, movies, and shorts I’ve watched or am watching in February 2024, general thoughts, and ranking of them all.

Recommendation of the month(s): Honestly, this month involved me watching BLs which brought something new to the table (omegaverse, fantasy & thai legends, isekai-ed into a game, lawyers and crime) but none of them stood out to me as much as I’d hoped (my greatest wish is stronger, more coherent scriptwriting). Recommendation is try whichever concept seems most appealing.

Ranking

Pit Babe = The Sign = Mr. and Mrs. Smith

Love For Love's Sake = Midnight Runners (2017) = Laws of Attraction (2023)

Average Rating: 6.25/10 [unfortunate that I just for 6 and 6.5s considering I was hoping for more from Pit Babe/The Sign/Laws of Attraction]

MDL Updates - Added to Watchlist: 

A section because I’m curious about how many shows I decide to add to my Watch List a month and also the ratio of watching them:adding them.

Title MDL (year) - (date added to Considering or To Watch): initial reaction

Love for Love's Sake (2024): Positive reception and Cha Woongki is in it

Marry My Dead Body (2022) - 240202: I was watching Certified Noonas What's Coming Up in Feb 2023 and came across this, Taiwanese movie where dude marries a (male) ghost

Pit Babe (2023) - 240207: omegaverse racing show wouldn't necessarily draw me in but some Tiktoks I saw of eps 1-2 (esp of Charlie woahhh beautiful boy, I even reblogged on here which I very rarely do for shows I haven't watched yet) were interesting + lately, I've been seeing a lot of praise for it (esp that week when apparently Last Twilight Ep 12 disappointed a lot of people but had a really good episode for this show)

A Shop for Killers (2024) - 240210: I saw it on the Certified Noonas coming up in January I think? But I also saw it getting good impressions on the r/kdrama on-air threads + pocha playlist's initial impression + it has Lee Dong Wook, even though it's not like I watch all his shows or anything

A Killer Paradox (2024) - 240210: Been waiting for this since literally 2023 after I watched Strangers From Hell and saw in Certified Noonas' 2023 releases that it was from the same director + is an interesting concept

My Personal Weatherman (2023) - 240215: I don't know, maybe I just wanna see their dubcon bad bdsm dynamic. also, i keep reblogging horny gifsets cuz there are plenty for this show...

The Sign (2024) - 240215: The finale still isn't properly available yet so I don't really know how people will feel about the end but oh well, I'm gonna end up watching it either way because of how much people have been loving it

Chaser Game W (2024): Another Japanese GL and apparently it has toxic-ish workplace romance + post-breakup second chance romance yay. Also, the tweet where one of the characters is like “I’m a lesbian” *thunder* is hilarious

A Little Romance/Let's Wait for the Rain to Stop (2022) - 240219: A 14-minute Chinese bromance short from this tiktok that I saw

Dead Friend Forever - DFF (2024): I’ve been meaning to watch this since like ep 1 came out and I learned it was supposed to be horror-esque/slasher and seems like people have been loving it even more these past few eps. I’m actually so excited to check it out, I hope I love it and it rots my brain.

To Watch List At Start Of Month: 62

To Watch List At End Of Month: 67

Removed from To Watch List:

Title (Year) - (date removed): reason

None

Completely Watched

Love for Love's Sake (2024)

Country: South Korea

Release Dates: Jan 24, 2024 - Feb 1, 2024

Watch Via: paid, so :>

Watch Dates: Feb 1 - 2, 2024

Rating: 6/10

Overall Impression: It was cute, the concept was nice, the early 2 eps were Very promising and last ep was touching but the middle (esp 5-6) was quite meh for me. There was also a bunch of confusing stuff, esp in the second half, but I guess I won't try to investigate too much. It has people really talking and discussing and dissecting it though, which is a fun aspect.

tags: love for love's sake

Also Appears In: Love For Love's Sake Live Blogging

Midnight Runners (2017)

Country: South Korea

Release Dates: Aug 9, 2017

Watch Via: Tubi (free)

Watch Dates: Feb 3, 2024

Rating: 6/10

Overall Impression: I came in with expectations of copaganda and bromance. Got the copaganda (I mean the real cops were useless af but) and bromance, as well at annoyance at these male-led shows with female victims where the story is solely about the men and they just dilly-dally through it all like why are you not upright enough to be like oh, I shouldn't waste time getting my ears cleaned by pretty girl rn, there's a 7-hour critical timeframe we were taught about, chop chop. Anyway, they were still passionate and did it, so good job but this really was just more about a male power fantasy of being the hero and beating up people and being the "saviour" because it was just about them 2 doing anything and we don't even get a moment of the girls after rescue and like 1 minute of them total before that. I can enjoy these sorts of action movies and like a good fight scene but I think I can be really averse to using crimes against women while centering men in the show (Midnight Runners, fuckass Manner of Death). I love Beyond Evil though, even though 2 male main characters were the focus in this story where a serial killer is killing women but I think that story maybe that story 1) properly showed the gravity of the crime against the women and 2) there wasn't a scene like the ear-cleaning parlor in this one and the sex scene in Manner of Death after they got that important laptop where I was supposed to either find it funny or sexy that they were doing this instead of focusing on the fucking investigation.

Agh, so many words and half of them aren't even about this movie

Laws of Attraction (2023)

Country: Thailand

Release Dates: Jul 15, 2023 - Sep 2, 2023

Watch Via: paid, so :>

Watch Dates: Feb 3 - 6, 2024

Rating: 6/10

Overall Impression: I really liked To Sir, With Love which was a lakorn and so was different than every other BL I've watched and was hoping I'd similarly love this one, which is also bringing something unique to the BL table. It started off really well for me, I thought Charn was such a fun (morally corrupt) character and was intrigued about what was going on. I liked the lesbians Maya and Rose as well ofc. However, I think toward ep 7 and 8, it kinda became very meh for me (that warehouse live stream scene not counting) because the mystery was too predictable/boring and thus had no tension, people kept making incredibly stupid decisions, and I wasn't attached to the characters enough to care/be emotional about all the wedding stuff. Nawin was a great addition in ep 7 though, so unexpected and fun. Unfortunate that the meh impression ended up being the last ones since that sticks with me more than liking it in the earlier eps.

tags: laws of attraction

Also Appears In: Laws of Attraction Live Blogging

Pit Babe

Country: Thailand

Release Dates: Nov 17, 2023 - Feb 9, 2024

Watch Via: iQiyi (paid, so :>)

Watch Dates: Feb 7 - 11, 2024

Rating: 6.5/10

Overall Impression: This show had everything: non-traditional alpha/alpha relationship, racecar competitions, x-men like superpowers, child trafficking, pseudo-incest if you think about it (from Kenta's side at least), and more. And it didn't have a super strong script, there were nonsensical elements and plot holes that didn't get addressed and things that happened to just move the plot along, but it was a fun watch nonetheless, both for the novelty and the entertainment factor. Babe was a very compelling character with his past and how he behaves in the present and his relationships with Tony/Way/people in general. Also helped that Pavel did a really good job with him and acted his ass off, there were quite a few emotional moments in there. I agree with some people's comments that I wish Charlie's actor Pooh as a better actor. And his character wasn't as developed or with depth as the other ones either, like in terms of emotions I guess. Although I really liked Charlie/Babe, my true ship winners might be Pete/Kenta in a Not Me ToddBlack fashion, to be honest, with Kenta as maybe my favourite character (2nd is Babe). They gave us like 2 tiny hints that they might know each other and waited until literally last 10 mins of episode 11 out of 13 to lay out their history. They have an interesting friends (-> brothers/crush) -> enemies -> allies again at the very end dynamic where I think that they could become lovers post-canon. Really had me writing a fic idea in my notes app after my few months of no drive to write.

tags: pit babe, kenta

Also Appears In: Pit Babe Live Blogging, + my fic heh

240215: I'm not starting Only Friends already because I wanna take some time to write my Pete Babe fic and if I start a new show, I'll stop writing it. However, I was in dire need of some BL and ended up rewatching just bits of Ghost Host Ghost House ep 4 after I saw a gifset on here, then watched like 2 mins of Bed Friend cat Uea and then Eps 13 - 15 of Addicted Heroin. Man, once again, 2016 Addicted Heroin cutoff must've actually been so fucking tragic. Like I'm only rewatching parts of it nearly a decade later + watched the Stay With Me remake and still it's devastating the way it just ends, I can't imagine how people who were watching it in real time coped. How has nobody leaked it even asdfghjkl Also ended up reading chapters 96 - 135 because I was like hm maybe I wanna read more but the book is A Lot, so stopped lol

Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005)

Country: USA

Release Dates: June 7, 2005

Watch Via: TV

Watch Dates: Feb 19, 2024

Rating: 6.5/10

Overall Impression: This is fun and finally I will understand what people mean when they reference this movie (although I knew that it was about hitmen/spies who were married and didn't know the other was a spy as well and that's pretty accurate). Had one of my favourite tropes of having guns/knives pointed at each other and ample chance to kill the other person but they Can't!!! Todd/Black was my original for this but then we got Vegas/Pete, Pete/Kenta and now this movie which came out like 2 decades before these other shows lol Anyway, fun but not something I will think about again + the characters aren't developed enough for me to care.

The Sign (2024)

Country: Thailand

Release Dates: Nov 25, 2023 - Feb 11 (24), 2024

Watch Via: Youtube

Watch Dates: Feb 20 - 24, 2024

Rating: 6.5/10

Overall Impression: I think I liked the first few eps and the potential of the series and the possibilities than I liked the actual series oof. Since everybody freaking loved this, I also had high expectations. I thought there would be more focus on the romance and fantasy and past lives aspect and less on the cop activity. I feel like they didn't choose the correct things to show on screen. I think most of the fight scenes and stuff were confusing and not choreographed very well, and some moments needed to have more time dedicated to them or have more gravitas to them. However, some moments were just shot/directed so beautifully. I enjoyed the parallels between Tharn and Phaya or their current life and past life. It shows the cyclical nature of Phaya and Tharn's lives, and it would've been even more impactful if we saw more of their past lives (their OG life or other reincarnations). Highly doubt I'm gonna think of the characters again, I somehow stopped being attached to them about halfway through - probably related to the fact that I liked the first few eps (half?) of the show better. They tried so many things, but I don't think they satisfyingly merged them or chose the correct things to focus on on-screen.

tags: the sign

Also Appears In: The Sign Live Blogging

I’m not watching anything in the last week of February because I seriously need to study for this exam and can’t have a show distracting me but am also in such desperate need of a BL, so I skimmed some stuff.

240226: Skimmed parts of History 3: Trapped’s last few episodes and it continues to hit. agh, it’s just so good. Also skimmed a bit of Semantic Error middle episodes but not as much as Trapped

240228: Skimmed some middle bits of the Our Dating Sim movie, I really need to rewatch the full thing in year cuz I think it’s possible for it to go from 6.5 -> 7

It’s a shame that I only watched 6 things this month (and 2 of those were movies that) because I had a week of break in the middle from university. Still, it’s fine because I used that week to write a fic after a couple months instead, so I’m not too sad. And since the Thai BLs were pretty like plot-involved (esp The Sign and Laws of Attraction), it makes sense that I wasn’t just jumping from show to show.

Posts Created This Month:

2024 Anticipated Series & Movies

...Pit Babe fic

#tracking #general bl #love for love's sake #pit babe #the sign #laws of attraction

[lonelypond]

Dear Santa, A LoFi Holiday Love: Interlude

NicoMaki, Love Live, 800k-ish, 2/3

Interlude

N: Cute Christmas pics

M: Thanks. Yours too. Your siblings look just like you.

N: Yep. Darn cute, just like Nico.

N: |Nico sends picture of many shoe racks|

M; Include yourself for scale.

N: Σ(ﾟﾛ､ﾟ;)

M: Do you have a bus just for shoes

N: That's Nico's closet

M: So you're never home becasue your clothes and shoes take up your entire apartment.

N: Nico has a cozy sleeping nook with the most amazing view.

M: |sends room picture, large windows, bed opposite, Christmas tree, gas fire, Maki at piano|

N: That's a gorgeous view too (Nico means you).

M: (^ ^*) This room and the piano is the only thing I like about being here. My parents are never home.

N: You have your own bedroom Christmas tree. Decadent.

M: dia keeps putting a dent in the decorations.

N: !??!?!

M: SHe rearranges the ones she can reach. And she doesn't like snowflake ones.

N: Cute.

M: Not when she leaves them on the floor and I step on them. Snowflakes are spiky *pain face*

N: So like Legos.

M: So like C R U N C H ｡ﾟ(ﾟ`⊿゜)ﾟ｡

N: You need to use non breakable ornaments. Rookie mistake.

M: Yeah

M: I guess I was always careful. Didn't want to get on Santa's Naughty List

N: Can't you use that argument on Dia?

M: She just says "Mama' like it's my fault.

N: Future lawyer.

M: My parents would love that ALMOST as much as they love future doctor.

N: Doesn't Dia get to be a silly kid for a decade or two?

M: "It's never too early to learn your responsibilities"

M: I"m quoting my mother.

N: ‧∘˳°∗˚(⁎›ˍູ‹) ∗.∘˚˳°

N: When Nico has children, they'll get to be kids and follow their dreams.

M: You want a family?

N: Duh. Of course, Nico is a Subaru minivan full of family vibes.

M: Yeah *chuckles* Dia took to you right off.

N: Smart girl (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

N: Nico loves being a big Sis. My sibs made everything better.

N: I had three reasons to get up and make breakfast and smiles, after Papa…

M: You must have been so brave.

N: ᕙ(͡°‿ ͡°)ᕗ Nico wants to see everyone smile, especially the people she loves.

M: (-_^)

N: Okay, pretty girl, you can be on Nico's list.

M: Naughty or nice

N: (∩⌣̀_⌣́)

N: Both?!?! Can it be both.

M: d(-_^)

###

M: Dia's grumpy today.

N: Poor baby.

M: Me or Dia?

N: Both.

M: (ó﹏ò｡) She misses home.

M: Mama and Papa insisted we visit the hospital so they could show off their grandchild.

N: DIa didn't like it?

M: No. Too many people. Dia can be shy.

N: You always make her sound ready to charge right into things. Nico respects that.

M: SHe likes to

N: ?

M: Warm up.

N: Like stretching?

M: No. Like it has to be people she already knows.

N: oh

M: By three, she'll know every nurse's name.

N: Charming like her mama

M: Strictly trained in hospitality and etiquette like her mother.

N: Introvert like her mama?

M: (;¬_¬)

N: I bet your thinking face is adorable.

M: (╯’□’)╯︵ ┻━┻ don't interrupt (;¬_¬)

N: |Selfie of Nico leaning forward, cute bunny pajama hoodie, chin in hand|

M: DIa's probably an extrovert. She loves being in groups, just groups of people she knows.

N: Center of attention.

M: Yeah.

N: Nico's like that. Give me a spotlight and an audience

M: And you thrive.

N: Thrive Entertain Heal Support Inspire ♪٩(✿′ᗜ‵✿)۶♪ Nico Nico Ni

M: Big goals for such a tiny elf

N: ha ha wait'll you see Nico onstage. You'll realize Nico's true impact.

M: Can't wait.

N: We're still on for Saturday? It might be too busy for Dia.

M: Grandparents are built in babysitters.

N: True. My mom would go nuts over a grandchild, especially one as cute as Dia, but Nico and Cccoro have been on the career woman path, not the dating one.

M: What about the other two?

N: Too young.

M: Oh right.

N: Nico wants to dance into the dating path.

N: With the right partner ♪(ﾟ▽^*)ﾉ⌒☆

M: ˚▱˚

N: you're silly.

M: (ⅈ▱ⅈ)

N: Nico has to sleep. Early rehearsal.

M: See you Saturday.

N: And in Nico's dreams.

M: (´～`) zzz

N: Good night, Maki. Say hi to Dia for me. See you soon.

M: G'night.

M: ( ˘ ³˘)♥

M: Until Saturday.

N: ─=≡Σ((( つ ◕o◕ )つ

#NicoMaki #Nishikino Maki #Yazawa Nico #Dia mentioned #Family fluff #fluff #holiday fluff #text fic #Love Live #Dear Santa

[manapuacat]

Entry 1

I am titling this entry 1 so that I can numerically measure my consistency with writing, even if it's this-- free writing on Tumblr in a a very self-aggrandizing way.

I feel like my capacity to think and obtain words just out of my reach has shrunk due to the internet. Perhaps I should be on it less. Perhaps it's all habit and what I perceive as a comfort in my day can be replaced. There is a voice that looms from the periphery-- "with what?" And, I guess that's life.

I have been reading and looking into Maria Hornbacher since discovering she is finally finally releasing new writing. My view on coincidence and time and connectedness and fate are ever-changing, but I feel as if my connection with her at this point in my life is paving a clear trajectory into a direction when I was at a fork. I am talking about my hesitation towards writing, battling an itch while not knowing what to write while dreading the act and my words or words-to-be. She articulated the state of the publication industry that makes me feel less sour towards rejected work. I am now going to channel my murky energy for writing towards sub stack, where I will be interacting with other creators- reading, learning, imbibing, putting fingers to keyboard and articulating myself into print. That seems more doable and within my reach than the lofty publication industry and the unnecessary channels to go through to earn a single reading of your manuscript.

Marya also is at a place where she is choosing to be single after failed marriages and after articulating to herself what her place in this world is for and understanding that any romantic relationship has heretofore detracted from that. As Rilke said, solitude is difficult to bear, but it is that ache and tension within oneself that must be met head on. It is a foreign entity that is arising and making its nest and our insides must learn it and readjust to give it space.

I have felt a terrible back and forth in my romantic life and have been hit with the lamentable realization that I am maybe fit to be alone. I don't believe we are here for any reason at all, much less purely to play a part in a romantic relationship. Love is magical, yes. But, love is rare. I have not ever felt full, consistent love for another. Maybe it is my upbringing or 10,000 other variables that have taken place and have consummated in the current Me. Regardless, love has failed me insofar as I would like to experience romantic love and insofar as I'm not willing to concede to anything less.

I am currently kneeling before my bed writing this, listening with one ear for any domestic murmurings of my neighbor so I can tally off a cardio workout. This is my current life and I don't think it's so bad. I work three 12 hour shifts in the coming days and humans are weird and I am one of them.

I have been on three ish dates with another woman named Ana (pronounced Ah-nuh which is both sensuous and annoying). I feel a keening from her that is annoying. I feel she deeply wants to be loved more than she can allow for real, courageous love to flourish. She needs the immediate validation of another person's adoration for her and physical connection to her. This is my perception and may be false. But, I cannot give this to her. I believe in the slow kindling and earning of love for one another. Love that is trusting and allows for a gentle uncovering and flourish petal by petal under a Jupiter sun morning. She has been poking fun at my less animated presence. I don't show emotions easily, but that doesn't mean I am devoid. I also don't appreciate the poking as if it would encourage me to show more (it does the opposite). I also feel a childlike spite to snatch myself away and not entertain someone who merely wants validation and not me as I am. I once had an English ice breaker project wherein I had to use the letters in my name to write out qualities in myself. I couldn't find anything for the "R" and my mom suggested "moRe than meets the eye" and that was one of her shining moments. I felt a blood loyalty to her for asserting me, us- the women who open up in time and require kindling. We are rooted in ourselves so heartedly that we do not play well with this world of instant gratification. We are old spirits and women with our hands in the muck and when cut, our blood is mead and it gives to the world because we nurture. This is my difference from Ah-nuh and her good morning texts and negging wishes to role-play a physical hug via text. Maybe I sound like a defensive, whiny child. But, I am growing into the woman breed I come from and I am learning to articulate that to myself.

Articulate is a word I've used frequently throughout this text.

I've currently written for almost half an hour. No murmurings from the neighbor. I've seen him once on an elevator and he waved apprehensively with the shame of knowing he complained about my 95 lb body working out next door. I gave him a hard, weary stare.

Today, it is drizzling and I am probably going to walk in the rain and maybe entertain a bath later. I would like to get better and relishing in solitude versus enduring it as if it's transitory. I want to light candles for myself, the nicer ones that I save for visitors and dress in tights for dinner and play my records and wear socks too large.

I would like to learn more about apothecary type things. I can't articulate it exactly, but the spiritual beliefs and culture surrounding yoga and living plant-based. I would like t explore the very earthen, dark side of it without bordering cosplay.

I would like to toss my phone into the river and watch as it goes and hits a rock and shatters, each of its parts floating away in separate directions.

#dear diary

[calamityandme]

I worked for R today and then rushed home as fast as possible.

My friends were waiting for me in their car when I pulled in to my parking spot. I quickly unloaded some things from my car into my house, swapped keys with my fiancé, smoked two w33d bowls in under five minutes, then hightailed it into their backseat. We had an afternoon showing of the Eras Tour movie to see.

The movie was really fun. It felt like we got to be apart of it, especially since I didn’t get to go the actual show. I sang along quietly. I got the mini popcorn bucket and a big ass Taylor Swift cup. Very hyped. It’s my first piece of Taylor swift merch lmao. We went to an earlier showing so the theater was pretty empty, but it was nice to listen to almost the entirety of the show live-ish.

Now I’m home. My day has been very nice but I feel unbelievably drained. I came home and instead of smoking or finding something fun to do, I sat on the couch and just blanked I guess. I just sat and thought. For around three hours. I spent time on my phone off and on, but I mostly just needed to process.

TW: abuse, relative death

I think an underlying issue I have been avoiding is today is a weird day. October 14th is many things to me. The birthday of my abuser. I don’t need to give him a fun anonymous name because he legally changed his name to hide from his past. “Don”. Today is also my parents’ wedding anniversary. It’s also my late grandfather’s birthday. He died two years ago. This date is just a weird one for me. We always celebrate it annually because obviously my parents love each other. We used to also call grandpa and grandma up every year around this time and say “Happy birthday”. Now I text my grandma to let her know I’m thinking about her. I need to call her soon. I just haven’t had the emotional energy or “spoons” to be able to do it. I know it’ll be wonderful to talk to her.

I have a lot of hatred for Don. I honestly wish him the worst in life. He took advantage of a child for a perverted fantasy. There’s probably countless young girls that have been hurt by him. That have been raped by him. Like I was. When I think about him my chest hurts. It’s heavy around my sternum and goes deep inside me. It’s round and dense like a bowling ball but it’s the biggest bowling ball you’ve ever seen. I would feel comfort if I knew he learned from his actions but I know he hasn’t. He has done it before and will most likely continue to do it. Prison didn’t stop him. It’s kept me up at night, but if I let him haunt me he’s won. All I can do is try to exist with this hurt. I remember it All Too Well (lol).

I have also been having some cramping and pain in my guts and uterus. I haven’t had much to eat today so I can imagine that has something to do with it. I have only snacked throughout the day. I just hope I’m not going to get sick.

Anyway, this has been a long and erratic entry. I just needed to word vomit. I feel like one of those Tik Tok Lives of someone very slowly and precisely chipping the shell of a raw egg, exposing the thin membrane until the whole thing is a delicate ball of somethingness sitting in your palm. Or maybe my palm. Idk. Someone’s palm. Whoever you are.

#journal #diary #diary posting #blog #blogging #mental health #w33d #writing #grief #tw abuse #child abuse #domestic violence #survivor #drama #messy #vent post #vent #personal vent