#it feels so intentionally malicious

[absentlyabbie]

i've developed some interesting methods of handling having a relationship with my mother who made my childhood/teen years misery and committed more than a little abuse.

as an adult, we have a very different dynamic, her daughters (sister and i) have confronted her with a lot of her bullshit and the things she both did and enabled. for some she has been sorrowful and even sometimes apologetic. she's a better mother to me now than she ever was when i most needed one. so i'll never actually trust her again, and she'll never be much deeper than surface level in my life, but we have something mostly good now, and on my terms.

however, she is very definitely one of those "i don't remember it that way" and "i did the best i could" mothers in a lot of areas, and has also always been the type to (probably unconsciously) emotionally manipulate the people she's hurt into catering to her hurt feelings about it instead.

over the years i've learned to get really comfortable with just not indulging it.

is she having a bad day, seems sad and upset? i'll give her a hug, try to make her laugh. if she throws broad hints it's a surge of hurt feelings about having driven one of her children to cut her off? well i'm just gonna stand there and not acknowledge or entertain it.

"well, apparently i was a bad mother" or shit like that? i'm just gonna look at her for a second, and i might either shrug or even nod, but i'm not saying a damn thing. i'm not awkwardly, uncomfortably, painfully contorting to her guilt trip nonsense. i'm not apologizing or trying to soothe her or reassure her or minimize it.

like, yeah. you really were. you know it, glad to hear it. we've definitely had that talk.

best kindness, most generosity i can offer her in times like that is not maintaining eye contact to bluntly tell her "yeah, you were." she can go ahead and feel bad about it.

it's not on me to make her feel less bad. she should feel bad. and i am definitely not someone she gets to seek comfort from about it.

hopefully someday she'll inch past just "poor me, i'm so sad and angsty about it" towards, like, examining the whys and acknowledging what she actually did wrong and work actively to be be better. in a few places, some of that has happened.

but that's her work. her job and responsibility. she can do that shit on her own time.

i say all this to offer a shoulder of solidarity to others like me. if you maintain a complicated relationship as an adult with the parent who hurt you and did you wrong as a child, that is okay. you get to choose how and if to thread that needle.

but you don't have to accommodate emotional manipulation and guilt trip garbage. stonewall it. walk away if you need to. don't apologize. don't try to make it better. that's not on you and it doesn't have to be. it's okay.

#to her perhaps dubious 'credit' #this has shown genuine results #she has over the years pulled a lot less of that shit #of laying emotional traps to try and make me comfort her about how horrible she was to us as a mom #because she doesn't get the desired result #it's not an easy thing to make a choice to continue having a relationship with a parent like this #who caused you serious harm and painful long-lasting damage #especially not always intentionally generally not maliciously #the abuse was the abuse and it doesn't matter why #how she conducts herself now is what determines if i give her any chance to be any kind of decent mom now #and it's SO HARD at first #because that's your mom you LOVE your mom even through all the shit #you're hardwired to love your mom and you hate to see your mom hurt #instinct is to Make It Better #but that's not always the correct response it can be downright detrimental #to yourself and to her own personal growth towards being someone better #so you teach yourself to just Let Her Be Upset #she should be upset and in a case like this it may in fact be good for her #and it's just not my damn job to make her feel better and i don't mind making that plain #you grow more comfortable with it over time #hold your ground and your stance gets stronger with each step-back not taken #abuse mention

[saturnniidae]

Wow, I sure do love being a black, jewish fan of a TV series that's only un-reedeemed villains are a greedy, hook-nosed merchant that travels the world and a foreign black man.

#ventish kind of #idk ive just finished my rtte rewatch and with a refreshed memory of the series i have. feelings #httyd #race to the edge #httyd rtte #racism #rtte krogan #trader johann #httyd racism #also drago was only in rtte for like less than a minute or smth #but the fact hes intentionally designed to be as ethnically ambiguous as possible to look foreign compared to our white nordic heros #while simultaneously being like the s*avage angry domineering and evil black man sure is. something #also to clairify: i love httyd and rtte with all my heart its my special interest but #that doesnt mean i dont get to be pissed abt blatant 'non white features = bad' stereotyping #its likely not done with malicious intent but. implicit bias so #shrugs #i migjt makr another post going more in depth idk its 4am im sleepy and have school in a few hours #moth.txt

[ofdreamsanddoodles]

blown away by the absolute audacity of a cis woman to identify as a trans woman. like there's nothing i can say that someone else hasn't said better, but just. what do you think trans woman means that an afab person who has a typical cis body that has made no alterations other than a simple haircut gets to claim it? how flimsy of an identity do you think it must be

#aster speaks #i have seen circ*mgender shit in the past but i feel like most ppl claiming it r children #this feels so actively malicious the fact ppl are defending it feels almost like #theyre INTENTIONALLY labelling themselves as transmisogynists

[aro-culture-is]

Being in Aroace spectrum culture is being a fic writer and writing romantic and s*x scenes that lean more towards describing platonic relationships. And also sometimes write pwp works and get angry that readers prefer to read them, and not really good and important for you gen works

(quick note: please do not censor [ie, using asterisks] words in submissions. leave them as they are so that others may read them with screen readers, or filter them as they so choose.)

#aro culture is #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #ask #mod axel #sex ment cw #aroace culture #the frustration is understandable #culturally a lot of folks definitely value romance and sex quite a bit #but if it helps at all - it might be worth reminding yourself that fanfic culture is inherently tied to queer experiences and specifically #mlm content - which often means that people read fanfic with the intent to *find* mlm content #there is a devaluing of gen fic by some cultures in some fandoms - i absolutely will not deny that. #but: there is also a disproportionate amount of readers that are seeking ship fic because that is what fanfic is associated with. #they may not intentionally avoid gen fic - but they may be looking for a specific ship that they feel represented by or in some way seen by #and filter out gen fic as a byproduct of searching for that ship #it may or may not help to tell yourself this. but often avoidance of gen fic is not malicious so much as incidental #and a lot of folks who love gen fic will also be seeking out your works and be excited to find any content at all #given the frequent lack of it #your work is valued by those who find it. i promise.

[sounwise]

Okay, how about [Chet] Flippo’s allegation [in the biography Yesterday] that McCartney is a loner, a man who is loved by the masses but has virtually no close friends? “I’m not alone,” McCartney says. “I wish I was more alone. I’ve got four kids. I’ve got a million neighbors. I’ve got a lot of friends. I’ve got a band, producers. So, I mean, what am I doing? I’ve got friends! We have parties! Come on, please love me! Well, fuck off. I’m not that interested. These people who write these things don’t even know me. If they don’t want to love me, fine. If you want to bitch about me, great. They’ll be proved wrong one day. God knows how long it will take, but that’s my attitude. I have no control.”

[—from “Can Paul McCartney Get Back?” in Rolling Stone (June 15, 1989)]

#simply DRAGGING MY HANDS DOWN MY FACE about this one #bc yes paul's response is very valid particularly in context since #i think he was likely responding to what flippo actually wrote rather than to the base interview question as #what flippo wrote was EXTREMELY malicious + suggested that not only did paul have NO friends but also that nobody liked him and #that he'd driven george and ringo away by being oh-so-horrible to them from the Very Beginning etc etc etc lots of bullshit #but also. #when taken against the base interview question #the examples he chose just COULD NOT sound ANY MORE like they're proving the point if he'd INTENTIONALLY set out to sabotage himself #'kids neighbors a band and producers' oh paul NONE of those are what people have in mind when they say 'close friend' :( :( :( #SAD ABOUT IT bc setting aside all the stupid shit flippo wrote on the subject yeah #i Do think that paul had Very Few genuinely close friends in the 1980s (though not none and definitely not for those reasons!!!) #and more to the point was pretty isolated from the ones he DID have including in large part geographically due to not living in london #and increasingly recording only at home and not touring for most of the decade bc fears after john's murder #so yes lonely but. not in the way flippo would have it at all #anyway this is Fine. i have no feelings about the beatles actually #paul mccartney #1989 #1980s #the beatles #rolling stone

[beelzzzebub]

oh my god. i just got an ad that said that you can lose weight better if you let out your pent up emotions. once you have a good cry you can finally start 'slimming down.' someone fucking help me. what in the pop psychology. like. ok. i don't really have anything extremely articulate to say right now but i just. come on. that's like a whole new level of just blatantly taking advantage of people's poor emotional state and body image. because at this point people are at least a little more aware of how harmful diet culture is, so now we're hiding behind this veil of being wholesome and self aware. we're not like the other diets because we care about you, so now we're weaponizing this culture of mindfulness and surface level mental health to take advantage of you and get your money. i. like maybe i'm reading too much into this but ohhhh boy did that make me angry to see on my dash just now. anyways i hope you're doing ok and i love you and please i hope you are loving yourself as well in the new year <3

#boink #look im not gonna claim to be an expert on health and shit #but i just think that that's a horribly malicious and intentionally manipulative thing to be putting out #like oh your exercise isn't making you lose weight the way you want #so buy our program and cry and then you'll lose weight? #it's healthier for you? #fuck that #ive always been self conscious about exercising and stuff bc im not small #im not thin and im not athetlic and i feel like thats not for me #and its taken me a long time to sort of be ok with and love my body #and its still hard for me to engage in that bc i still feel like i dont fit #i want to go to the gym and i want to do sports but bc people are shitty a lot of the time #ive sort of spent a lot of time being in those spaces and just not feeling super comfy there #and you know what #what's helped has been acknowledging that im doing it for myself #not for anyone else #not for people to be more comfortable looking at my body #but because i want to take care of myself and that is independent of my weight #and of others perceptions of me #i can go for a run bc it makes me stronger and i dont care if i lose weight or not because thats not what its about #and just #like a lot of people i know what its like to be in a very emotionally charged state #and to have that be connected to the way i perceive myself and my body and my worth #and again. it's just so shitty to take advantage of that #so openly i think too is why this was so. fjjs idk. #you know #anyway #sorry vent over ig lollll

[blossomhcir]

Continuing my series on Adelaide's relationships with her family, I want to talk about Douglas today. Douglas is undoubtedly the parent Adelaide is closest to and has the most loving relationship with. Douglas often gets credit for bring the better parent in my writings, but I want to expand on aspects of their relationship things that had just as much of an influence on Adelaide as her mother.

While they're close, there was a period of time around when she hit puberty that Douglas began to distance himself from her more. Adelaide had always been his little girl, but by Westerosi standards she was starting to transition into womanhood. That led to the consideration that she might have to leave home, marry, start a family of her own, which was hard for him to handle. Adelaide was born not long after the death of his only living sibling, then when she was still small his father passed away, leaving him with no living relatives. Adelaide was his first child and the thought of losing her was painful. He’s not good at handling his own emotions, so he isolates and becomes distant. This created a bit of an anxious attachment to him that contributed to her need to look after him and prove she’s useful.

In many ways both Douglas and Esther parentified Adelaide. Esther in her poor health largely relied on Adelaide to serve as nurse and caretaker, while Douglas offloads his responsibilities to Adelaide. Following Esther’s death she went from caring for one parent to the other, all while being a teenager who had almost no outlet for her own grief. She spent a good portion of her life trying to emotionally manage both her parents, to be as pleasing as possible to both because she craved approval and love so much. Through both of their actions or in actions they’ve raised a daughter who constantly looks for outward validation instead of someone who is self assured.

#*❀ relationships; douglas malus #*❀ study; headcanon #( this is a ramble while I’m at work so it probably doesn’t make much sense ) #( sometimes I feel like I give him too much credit for being a good dad when like ) #( both of them are really not intentionally malicious but still caused damage )

[illputdownmyrootswhenimdead]

thinking about my ocs lads

#cw for ​mentions of child abuse and neglect in the tags #i wanna revamp my ducktales/disney ducks ocs #because i miss them :( #im trying to rewrite their backstories and maybe make human versions of them? i don’t want to scrub away the ducks entirely lmao #so far ive fixed up a new story for vera 😎 #she’s the illegitimate child of a professional thief who mostly steals jewelry and precious gems #and a morally kind of screwed and ruthless businessman in some kind of jewelry-related industry #who also has done some vigilante justice that lead to him meeting the thief. and then they fell in love #they’re not very good for eachother lol #and neither of them would be good parents #her mom tries to keep her away from her dad and succeeds for like 12 years by telling vera that she was. conceived without much consent #which is fucked up to say to a kid and it doesn’t get much better from there #vera’s mom is a dangerous unscrupulous person who should not have a kid #she drinks often and vera is scared of her but also very angry. #(to be fair she doesn’t really do it intentionally. vera’s mom is fairly mentally ill due to her own upbringing. it’s not really malicious) #vera feels like a burden to everyone bc of how her mom treated her :( #and her father is less unstable but he’s too emotionally distant and focused on his work that if vera was with him #she would end up being almost as neglected as with her mom #vera is very tragic and sad. she’s just a kid #im trying to rewrite what i had of her main plot where she meets her dad and extended family #it’s kinda fun to retool it into something original 😎 #i wanna do the same for rosalie next because I Miss Her #cute lesbian seamstress…….. #anyway this was oc time. #vera cassandra #rosalie henderson #my ocs

[gyudons]

despicable

updates as of 22 oct

Travis Dermott knew that he would draw attention with his actions in the Coyotes’ home opener against the Anaheim Ducks at Mullett Arena on Saturday. The Arizona defenseman just hoped that the spotlight might shine on the issue that he was addressing, not on him.

“You don’t really want to go against rules that are put in place by your employer, but there’s some people who took some positive things from it,” Dermott said. “That’s kind of what I’m looking to impact.

“You want to have everyone feel included and that’s something that I have felt passionate about for a long time in my career. It’s not like I just just jumped on this train. It’s something that I’ve felt has been lacking in the hockey community for a while. I feel like we need supporters of a movement like this; to have everyone feel included and really to beat home the idea that hockey is for everyone.”

“I won’t lie,” said Dermott, who is playing on a one-year, two-way contract. “From the outside, it’s easy to see that I’m putting my career on the line for something. I definitely went through some emotional ups and downs that night, not regretting anything by any means, but I’d love to have maybe done a couple of steps a little different by making sure that everyone was aware of what was going on before I did it.

“I don’t want to put my teammates or my coaches or my GMs or the equipment managers in any kind of bad light when it’s their job to kind of look out for something like this happening. It was definitely something that I did just by myself and was prepared to kind of deal with whatever repercussions the league decides to push towards that. I’m not going to back off and say that this battle is won, but we’re going to find better ways to do it.”

As Dermott noted, LGBTQ+ inclusion is an issue that he has supported for a long time. Without getting into specifics, Dermott said the issue is personal for him because it impacts people close to him.

“I’d be lying if I said I haven’t shed tears about this on multiple occasions,” he said. “So yeah, it’s something I’m definitely very passionate about.

“I’ve met a lot of people that from the outside, it looks like they have everything going right in their life and they have a smile on their face every time they talk to you. But sometimes when we get closer to people and get comfortable enough for them to open up to you, you can see that there’s some pretty dark stuff happening to some good people. It doesn’t take too many times encountering something like that for it to really change someone.

“I’ve been blessed to have some of those opportunities put in front of me to really change my view of what being a good person means; what being a good father and a good example and role model means going forward. You really see how people are hurting and it’s because of a system that maybe no one’s intentionally trying to be malicious about, but until you’ve really had that first-person experience seeing people hurting from it right in front of you, it’s tough to kind of take steps.”

It would be a surprise if the league handed down any sort of punishment. The optics alone would add to the public relations damage that the original ban created. Even so, Dermott reiterated his desire to bring the entire franchise into the fold before he takes similar actions in the future, but he also made it clear that he will not be silenced on the topic.

“It’s not like I’m shutting up and going away,” he said. “I know more questions are going to be coming. We’re just going to be as prepared as we can be to just spread love. That’s the thing. It’s gay pride that we’re talking about, but it could be men’s health. It could be any war. It’s just wanting world peace. Everyone’s got to love each other a little bit more.

“Like my parents said growing up, ‘How awesome would it be to be the guy that people look up to?’ That’s what really hit home when I was a kid, especially from my mom. You want to grow up and be that guy. You want to be the guy that’s having the impact on kids like NHL players had on you. If they had been racist or bigoted, that’s going to have an effect on you.

“With how many eyes are on us, especially with the young kids coming up in the new generation, you want to put as much positive love into their brain as you can. You want them to see that it’s not just being taught or coming from maybe their parents at home. They need to see it in the public eye for it to really make an effect.”

#nhl #pride #lgbt #gay #queer #hockey

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

realized ricky is not only canonically polyam, but rep for polyam survivors who are abused for being poly, and i am having a lot of feelings about that which i plan to write up a post about but also wow in hindsight it put some shit from an abusive ex-friend into perspective.

#whosebaby talks #SDMItag #abuse cw #polyphobia cw #there is just. still a lot that i am unpacking about how deeply abusive her muses were in ~healthy relationships~ with mine #which was really fucked up to put me through by itself but was also *deeply* telling about our friendship in general #a major aspect being how she constantly went back and forth between being very clear that she was repulsed and disgusted by my queerness #and pretending she never said that; while playing olympic-level gymnastics for any possible bullshit alternate explanation she could find #and i'm just like. in hindsight it has become deeply cathartic to write/engage with stories where the polyphobic abuser #is openly and intentionally and maliciously abusive; and framed as such #after the relentless gaslighting and queerphobia of ~healthy OTP relationship~ where a poly muse i had put a lot of myself into #brought up the subject of whether his partner would be alright with him pursuing a relationship over feelings he was Just Starting to Have #and wanted to get ahead of things and ask the moment it became relevant; specifically because he knew the partner had jealousy issues #and the poly person Absolutely Fucking Daring to Have Even the Beginnings of a Crush at All Without His Permission #sent the partner into a massive wailing nauseous spiraling self-harming world-ending inconsolable breakdown #and going practically catatonic with jealousy and ~pain and betrayal~ #and the ~healthy resolution~ was the poly muse apologizing profusely for it; comforting him; and promising it would never ever happen again #'he has BPD and jealousy issues and it hurts him sooooo so bad 🥺' i hope otto cheats on him with ten people and then dumps his ass #BPD doesn't make you abusive or polyphobic even if you're mono #and it's so fucking gross that her non-BPD-having ass used pwBPD as an excuse for passionately hating poly people #but yeah there was just. so so much more horrible shit along those lines just In General with those characters alone #and it was constantly dressed up in a veneer of ~healthy relationships uwu~ and in hindsight that's another reason #i have such an extremely strong reaction to 'no see this dynamic is good and home-grown organic wholesome and healthy uwu' #'[most abusive/bigoted/etc shit you have ever seen in your life]' #and why it is honestly such a fucking relief to be able to engage with a dynamic where the abuse is mask-off and openly Intended to Harm #just call me a slur and get it over with etc #anyway it's just. a Lot. #that person was a fucking nightmare and writing with them was a fucking nightmare #last i heard they were part of that fandom's resident anti crowd and mocking/harassing disabled people for dietary limitations lol #and i'm glad they're out of my life and that apparently i've got enough distance from them to be comfortable processing it through fiction

[sing-me-under]

HAVE SOME GODDAMN EMPATHY. DEAR MOTHER OF GOD, BLESSED VIRGIN MARY, HELP US ALL. THE INTERNET NEEDS IT.

#personal #This isn’t directed towards anything in particular #I’m just fuckingntired #I work in customer service #retail #I love my job I feel like it’s my calling #but do you how exhausting it is to be constantly told how pleasant and wonderful I am in a day because I show basic human courtesy???? #like literally the bare fucking minimum to be nice to people #and people tell me I’ve immediately made their day just a little bit better #like damn #your life sounds horrible #I am a cashier being paid minimum wage in Florida #and me saying thank you and please and not judging you for using a plastic bag is enough to make your day better? #I’m more concerned than pleased that I’m nicer than most cashiers #that’s actually awful #people in general are just having a terrible time #so have just a little bit of goddamn empathy #people are not intentionally malicious #usually #god I hate society #y’all suck #basic human courtesy is apparently a dying trait

[definitelysapphic]

We need an app or something to make autistic friends in your area. I am so tired of going home upset after trying to make friends because people get weirded out by my autistic traits

#a lot of the time the neurotypicals aren’t even being malicious or intentionally hurtful but i can see it #the looks on their faces or their body language or their awkward laughter #even when they have positive reactions it feels so othering like im a cute animal at the zoo or something #like when i hand flap and they look at me like im a precious child #im a human adult please treat me like one #and then when i try to mask to get some fucking respect i come off like a bitch #there’s no winning

[idalievu]

thinking about how the house.... yeah......

hol spoilies in tags <3

#early on in my reread i started throwing around this theory that the house like an animal is neither actively malicious nor actively good #it operates outside of a sense of morality because it has no sense of morality and is simply acting in its own parameters which we humans #dont understand #as we often try to anthropomorphize things to be able to understand them #but thinking about its actions they were definitely actively malicious to at least a couple people within the household #like it definitely intentionally ate tom because he was - almost - someone who had enough clarity of mind to overcome its torment #he knew he was imperfect and he tried his best to help and love others and was a very uniting force when the houses main attack is through #feelings of isolation #what gets me is the few times the house has 'helped' the people inside of it #the transmission of the SOS signal of uhhh those guys that came with holloway i forget their names #i think theres been 1 or 2 other times its done something similar that almost felt like it was helping the inhabitants survive #and thats what trips me up about the hostility #does it want them to survive simply because that means it can keep tormenting them? #but i really dont think the house is something that only exists to torture #there are reasons and 'thoughts' behind its actions #to me it almost seems like the house is its inhabitants #it becomes the darkest part of themselves #or it becomes the labyrinth that theyve built within themselves to hide their worst parts #when theyre forced to confront their own inner self it becomes fully inhospitable and gets them lost #freezes them #hunts them down drives them insane #etc etc etc #the self refusing to be known i guess #and still theres a sense of self preservation and survival even in the darkest parts of ourselves so it sends out the sos signal #or maybe something about jed and the other guy resisted the house like tom did #i dunno this is all just brain soup and probably very basic reasoning here like 'uhh duh everyone knows that already' but sstill #i like writing my thoughts down #ANYWAY #house of leaves

[eternally-racing]

slip | lando norris

genre: angst + fluff

wc: 1k

warnings: none, there's maybe like 1 swear I think

summary: on a tough race weekend in qatar, you want to be there for Lando

-----

“What went wrong today in the car Lando?” 

You watch your boyfriend on your TV screen as your heart sinks when he says “Nothing, just a lack of talent”.  You know it had been a tough string of races for your blue-eyed boy, and this definitely wasn’t the first and would not be the last time that this happened, but you could tell something about this was really getting into Lando’s head.

I’m sorry about today, Lan. Give me a call whenever and we can chat <3 

You sigh as the message only tacks onto the last 3 unanswered messages you’ve sent to him. It’s not intentionally malicious, it never is with him. For so long Lando felt alone in the karting world that he got in the habit of getting in his head over a race weekend, and even with all the work you two have put into your relationship, sometimes he slips right back into those bad habits on those hard days. This wasn’t something you were going to let your boyfriend go through alone though, and that meant calling in some reinforcements. 

"Congrats on the first win Osc!"

“Thanks Y/N :) I know that’s not why you’re reaching out though…” 

Classic Oscar, you chuckle to yourself. He really is wise beyond his years. If anyone would be able to help you help Lando, you would hope that it would be his teammate. 

“It’s bad with him right now, isn’t it?” 

It’s a rhetorical question, but it still offers a glimmer of hope that maybe you’re being the overdramatic girlfriend and Lando’s actually fine. Unfortunately, that couldn’t be further from the truth when Oscar messages you back. 

“It’s really bad, Y/N. None of us know what to do. We need your help” 

That’s all the information you need before you’re setting your master plan into motion. You’re stuffing clothes into a duffle bag, calling in sick to work, and booking a plane ticket to head to Qatar yourself. There was only one moment of hesitation in the airport of “what the hell am I doing” before you look down at your lock screen of a smiley Lando out in the water in Bali. You wanted to bring that smile back so badly, and you hoped that this would be able to do that. Oscar is gracious enough to help you out with all the details of the team’s schedule for the weekend and the details of their hotel, but once you’re standing in front of Lando’s door the reality of the situation really hits you. You’ve come off nearly 12 hours of travel in one of Lando’s old sweatshirts and a pair of leggings, you haven’t looked in a mirror in equally as long which cannot be a good sign, and most of all you have no idea what you’re going to say to him once you see him. It had been a dream of yours to surprise Lando on a race weekend before - you had always imagined hiding in the driver’s room before FP1 and maybe pulling a cheeky prank or two when Lando showed up, but you had never prepared yourself for something like this. 

The key card to Lando’s room lays heavy in your hand, but you want to see if Lando will just open the door for you instead. The sound of your three quiet knocks on his door seem to fill the empty hallway, but you don’t hear any shuffling inside. 

“Hey Lan, it’s me.” are the only words you muster before you hear a clatter from inside. Your heart races as you can hear the click of the lock on the door. It’s truly like a scene in a movie, like time has slowed down for just the two of you. Lando rubs at his eyes like he’s seen a ghost, and it’s only when you reach out to touch his cheek does Lando realize that holy shit, you’re really here. He pulls you into his arms so tight that you feel like you can barely breathe and that’s when you hear it. Lando’s not just crying, he’s sobbing into your arms. The dam had finally broken and Lando had someone he could share his burdens with. You’re not sure how long you two stay there like that, Lando’s tears wetting the shoulder of your sweatshirt, you rubbing his back while whispering sweet nothings to him. Your boyfriend clings to you like he’s afraid that you’ll disappear if he lets go, and there’s now a comfortable air between you both. Once you finally pull away and can get a good glimpse at each other, it really sinks in for you that Lando is finally in front of you. While the point of this trip was of course to support your boyfriend, you couldn’t deny that having a long distance relationship for so long had taken a toll on you as well and you were thrilled to finally see him again, regardless of the circumstances. 

“Wow Y/N, you look…” 

You chuckle and finish Lando’s sentence off for him. “Like garbage I think are the words you’re looking for, Lan” you say as you pick off a piece of cat hair from your sweatshirt that only serves to further prove your point. 

“Beautiful, I was gonna say beautiful” Lando says softly, “but honestly I look like a hot mess right now so maybe we’d make a more perfect pair if we go with your description”. He gives you that cheeky smile that you’ve missed so much as he finishes his sentences, and before you know it you’re both giggling like teenagers together. For a moment it feels like you’re just regular Lando and Y/N on the couch back in Lando’s apartment fighting over what movie to watch on Netflix, not like you’re both in the middle of one of the most stressful race weekends of Lando’s career so far. 

The rest of the evening is filled with comfort and joy, and when Lando drives to P3 all the way from starting in P10 tomorrow, you’re the first person that Lando searches for in the crowd. A “thank you” is all that he musters out while you’re in his arms, but you can see from his eyes that he means so much more than that.

#f1 imagine #lando norris #lando norris x reader #lando fluff #lando angst #ln4 #lando norris x y/n #lando norris fic #f1 angst #f1 fluff #f1 fic #f1 x reader #lando norris imagine #lando x reader #lando norris fanfic #lando norris x you #formula 1 #lando #ln4 imagine

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

This is a fandom thing

AITA for accusing that publicly someone of intentionally posting their fics whenever I posted?

For context, I am autistic and write some fics that I post on AO3. But I ended up deleting my account there because some people started leaving me pornographic comments on the fics. All those comments were deleted along with the stories.

I will get to the main story now. I posted fics for a ship that I liked, but I also noticed that the fics barely got any views. So I decided to check the tags and see that someone else had also posted something which pushed my fics down from being the top post. I thought it was no big deal at first.

The second time I posted a fic for the ship, the same person also posts something around the same time. Once again, their fic pushed mine down from being on the top. And from what I saw, they got twice as many viewer interactions as I did. I thought that maybe it was just a coincidence that they posted when I did.

But then it happened a third time, then a fourth time, then a fifth time. Every time I posted for that ship, they posted something for that ship. I spoke to some friends about it and they said that they did not think it was just a coincidence. They were sure that this person was doing it with malicious intent.

Why would they think that you may ask? Because before I started posting my fics, I had said that I did not think it was fair that the ship had more fics for the male version of the mc than for the female version of the mc and that we could band together and post more fics for her. And then that person had made a since deleted post about how "female [character name] stans are the most annoying and obnoxious people in existence. All they do is boo hoo and whine when they don't get their content. If they are so upset, then those dumbasses should make the content themselves."

I decided to message this person because I saw that they had a tumblr account, and they just ignored all my messages. I ended up joining a discord servers they were in and I messaged them about how they kept posting fics when I did. They ignored my dms but were active in the servers. Since they kept ignoring me, I called them out in the server. Only then did they respond to me. They told me that it was just a coincidence and that I was just being overly sensitive. The other members in the server got on their side and called me rude and unprofessional for not keeping it in dms. I told them that I tried to but I kept getting ignored. The other members told me not to take the fic posting thing seriously and that it was no big deal and that I should just drop it instead of being upset.

I kept quiet after that and went back to posting fics for the ship, but the same person continued to post whenever I did. I pointed it out to the rest of the server and they called me an asshole for bringing it up again. So I just deleted everything on ao3 and left all the servers. I feel like giving up on writing now. It sucks because that was something I loved doing, but this experience has soured it for me.

So AITA for accusing that publicly someone of intentionally posting their fics whenever I posted?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #character selection scream

[linpunny]

✧ ೃ༄*ੈ Lovesick Sekido ✧ ೃ༄*ੈ

Dessy: He's a lovesick whore.

Synopsis: Secrets out of the bag Mean Daddy 'Kido now everyone will know why doggy and backshots is your favorite position.

CW: Knotting, explicit smut, blood kink/play, womb/cervix fucking, biting, sadist dom!Sekido, creampies, doggy style, impact play (spanking), hair pulling, scratching, heavy degrading, use of slut, whore, nasty bitch, mindbreak, mentions of breeding, mentions of ownership/claiming. Please let me know if any other warning need to be added!!!!

Word count: 2.3k

Network: @enchantedforest-network

Pairing: Sadist dom!Sekido and Fem slayer!Reader

*reader has a kitty kat but no pronouns

Patience was something Sekido lacked and he was at his limit for the day as he waited for you to come to him. So he took matters into his own hands and yanked you away from  Aizetsu, clawed fingers firmly wrapped around the cuff of your wrist applying just enough pressure to make the pulse point throb in his grasp. You fell in step behind him as he opened his mouth to chastise you for making him wait so long, “You are going to regret making me wait this long. I’ll make sure you don’t like this punishment.” His voice was malicious, almost sadistic as his sharp nails pricked into your skin daring to rip the flesh. He would never admit it but it was a false threat he would never intentionally cause harm to his little human, and the punishments he dealt out to you always ended up with both of you exhausted and overstimulated laying in silence next to each other.  His lips pulled into a grin at the thought as he guided you to his room.

You inhaled silently, trying to calm your erratic heart beat, knowing what was to come as Sekido pushed you through the room, closing the door quickly behind him as he dropped your fragile wrist. Crimson eyes darted to  the red flesh as he admired the way his fingers bruised a bracelet into your soft skin. He could still feel the warmth of you in fingertips, and he needed more. 

“Get on the bed, on all fours, face away from me..” You obeyed walking towards the bed but like always you were never quite quick enough for his liking and instead he grabbed both your wrists, gathering them in one hand as he threw you on the bed, climbing in behind you, getting on his knees as he slotted his thigh in between yours spreading your legs wide. Your hands  rested flat on the sheets of the bed as his hand landed on the small of your back placing you into a deep arch, face down in the pillow. You knew doggy was his favorite position, he had the most control of your body this way.

He kneeled close behind you, teasingly nudging your ass with his crotch. His other hand clasped tightly around the front of your neck, black claws trailing down your windpipe, leaving small scratches in the delicate flesh.You were already soaked with slick as you shivered when his hand rested on your breast, pinching the taut nipple through the fabric with this thumb and index. Involuntarily you moaned, body trained to react to his touch as the swell of your ass grinded down on his clothed erection. 

The “hn” that rumbled in his chest caused you to whimper out pathetically as he hunched up  your yukata over your hips giving him the perfect view of your plush ass, supple thighs and your bare cum stuffed cunt. Sekido’s lips pulled into a fanged grin, “Not even wearing anything under this yukata just like those nasty bitches that work in the red light district. Was working at a whore house part of your demon slayer training? Answer me dirty slut.” His free hand raised high in the air when you moaned in response, harshly connecting with the flesh of your ass with a loud clap.

 A shockwave of pleasure rushed through your body that caused your throbbing pussy to clench around nothing.“S’not part of training…” The imprint of his hand quickly welted highlighting your ass cheek with the prettiest of marks, one that he knew would last for days and remind you of him every time the cloth of your clothes brushed against the abused skin. 

He dragged his clawed hand sinfully slow over the hand mark he had just left, fingers rubbing circles into the raised skin as if he was soothing away the pain that he had just caused. Sekido chuckled darkly as his palm rubs over the meat of your hip bone, trailing down to your inner thigh, squeezing the flesh roughly, kneading his sharp nails into the skin. He touched everywhere but your dripping cunt, hands ghosting over your wet folds, nails raking over your mound, purposely avoiding your swollen clit, leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake as his warm hand continued to tease.

His eyes widen in delight as he watches you squirm so pathetically, you were basically fucking yourself on his cock and he hadn’t even taken himself out of his robe yet! “Pathetic whore!” He bucked his hips forward letting his erection dig into your plump asscheeks. “How can you be this desperate for my dick? The proud Demon Slayer sent to kill us has fallen so low acting just like a dick starved prostitute even though Aizetsu just bred this sloppy pussy. I could hear you crying his name out, should I fuck you like that too? Make you scream my name till your throat’s raw?” 

Whether you were aware of it or not Sekido could feel the arousal of his counterparts through the bond they shared, they were of the same cells, manifested from the flesh of Hantengu. Everytime the others fucked your he could feel it. His core tightened, burning hot with desire when you were with the others and he refused to thrust into his fist and waste his seed when he had a perfectly good slut to stuff full of his cum.

You rut yourself desperately into his pelvis, his rock hard erection making you mewl out in delight, the friction and the cloth of his kimono wasn’t enough though. You needed more. So much more from Sekido.It wasn’t long before your slick was drenching the front of his kimono as you tried your best to vocalize your needs to him, “Puh-please 'Kido…need you..” You weren’t even sure what you were by begging for, his hands, his dick, his cum? Your brain was already so foggy and filled with only one thing. Sekido. Sekido. Sekido. You turned your head to the side to beg again, hoping that if he saw the way your eyes were hazy with lust, how your mouth hung open panting and moaning just for him, he would split you open with his dick just like he always did. Instead, his hand quickly left your breast, sharp claws threading into your hair, forcing you to look away, cheek pressed into the pillow, the palms of your hands fisting into the sheets as his claws dug into your scalp. 

“Did I give you permission to look at me?” He growled. Sekido couldn’t let you see the way his cock was twitching under his robe when you rubbed your warm cunt and ass all over him, dampening the fabric to the point it stuck to his tip. He yanked roughly on your hair as you tried once again to meet his gaze, his other hand moved away from your heat to untie the sash of his kimono, allowing his thick cock to spring free. He took his length in his hand fisting it a few times as he smirked in the most lovesick way at the sight beneath him. You were the most delectable little human he had ever seen and the way his pulse raced, tip glistening with pre cum from the saccharine moans of his name falling from your mouth made his chest swell with unfamiliar feeling-something akin to carnal desire. 

“Seki--” The words died in your throat as he bullied the bulbous mushroomed tip through your drenched folds bottoming out with one deep thrust. He left no time for you to adjust to the size of his dick as he set a brutal pace, heavy balls slapping against your ass, the thick flesh of his large knot growing with each snap of his hips. “Wait! S-slow down, s’too much..Feels weird!” you cried out in pain, tears streaming down your face as he ignored your pleas continuing to  stretch your tight little cunt to fit the shape of his quickly thickening knot. His other hand curled around the fat of your hips, claws breaking the skin as he steadied himself. Each deep thrust knocked the breath from your lungs making you see stars as you sucked him back into your gummy walls when he retreated. There was something swelling and abusing your cervix painfully forcing the tight ring of muscles to open. Every time you tried to pull away Sekido’s hand dealt another heavy slap to the same spot over and over again until you were left a drooling, slobbering, obedient, broken mess on his cock. 

Sekido grunted in pleasure seeing you finally break for him, red eyes glowing bright with desire, fangs gritted, face drenched in sweat, hair disheveled as he fucked the fleshy thick swell of his knot into the deepest part your womb, a noticeable stomach bugle now disappearing and reappearing  with each fast thrust. “Fuck! Ha, only a nasty bitch like you would be this fucking easy to plug up. So quick to change your tone when you’re stuffed full of dick. How’s it feel to be fucked like a bitch in heat?” His brows furrowed together as he felt your walls squeeze him so tightly. You felt so fucking good.  He wanted more than anything to own you, craft you into a hole used for his pleasure. Turn you into his personal cockdrunk bitch. He desired to engrave the shape of his cock into your gummy walls, ruin you so you would never think of leaving him or his brothers. Fill each of your holes with so much of his cum that his scent would linger for days. 

The gooey pat-pat-pat of his hips thrusting into your soaked cunt caused him to shudder as the white creamy ring around his shaft thickened. “Its so fucking disgraceful how wet you are right now. Can’t stop cumming on a demon’s dick. Your fellow slayers would be so disappointed to know that you love being fucked by demons. You’re a cumdump for the Upper Moon Four now. That's your title.” He chuckled darkly knowing you were too fucked out to answer let alone comprehend what he was saying, the sounds of your moans echoed through the room as he pounded his thick fat dick and knot into your pussy relentlessly.

Your legs soon gave out, buckling from underneath you and the hand in your hair yanked you back up as the other left your bleeding and bruised hip to snake around your waist, pulling your back into his chest as he leaned down, his body dwarfing yours. “I’m not finished ruining you yet. You think i’ll stop if you pass out? Remember that you are my toy, a hole to use for my pleasure. Nothing else. I won't be gentle with you like the others.” He growled into your ear fangs grazing the shell. His tongue darted out to wet his lips hungrily. He wanted a taste, he could smell the scent of your arousal mixing in with the sweet blood that dripped down your thighs. The tip of his tongue licked a stripe down from your ear to the pulse point of your neck, large fangs piercing into the skin, warm crimson blood trickling down his throat as his claw traced the outline of the stomach bulge possessively. A low groan settled in his throat when he pulled away tongue lapping at the wound gathering the blood that ran down your neck until the stream of crimson dried. One taste was enough, Sekido knew if he took anymore than that he would lose control, get drunk off your blood and lose his composure showing you- his plaything a side of him that wanted to claim ownership, despite the agreement that was in place to share you. 

The new position pushed his knot impossibly deeper as his thrusts grew in intensity hitting a tight wall of muscles that he’d never felt before, it was enough to make his abs clench and his cock spasm as he felt your cum squirt all over his shaft again. He’d lost count of how many orgasms he’d coaxed out of you tonight but he knew his own was growing close. Sekido pulled on the strands of hair still knotted in his hand, the other hand holding the bulge now wrapped tightly around your waist again as he wildly thrusted up into your swollen cunt.

Your silken walls clung to his dick and knot so tightly that it felt like your pussy was giving him a blow job, trying to milk him for all he was worth. Sekido’s heavy breeding balls clenched as his core tightened, thrusts becoming sloppier as his thick fleshy knot grew in size once more, swelling with his cum. “You…You’re gunna take all of my cum. Keep it nice and warm in your womb all night for me like the good breeding slut I trained you to be. Take it. Take all of it, fuck im cumming!”

 Sekido threw his head back in pleasure, dark pupils blown so wide that the red of his kanji eyes was barely visible, voice straining as he groaned loudly knowing that the others would feel the rush of his cum flooding into your womb, painting your insides white. His knot throbbed violently a few more times as the last of his thick cum shot out in ropes, the swollen flesh creating a tight seal to keep his cum from spilling. His hand dropped from your hair as the both of you came down from your highs, bodies covered in a sweaty sheen as Sekido laid on his side, uncharacteristically pulling your connected body into his as your heavy eyelids closed as you drifted off into sleep. 

Sekido purposely made sure to snatch you away last so his scent would be the freshest, his cum the warmest, his voice the last thing you hear before passing out in his arms after he’s fucked you senseless. He would be the last thing on your mind and the first when you awake from your slumber with a deep throbbing sensation in your womb. 

© Linpunny 2023 All of the following works are fictional and belong to me. Please do not copy, edit, or steal any of my content. Do not advertise on any other social media.

#kny smut #demon slayer smut #sekido smut #hantengu clones #kny sekido #demon slayer #sekido x reader #dessy’s tomes