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happy-smiling-things · 5 years

Note

Hi! Can you do 21 for nessian? Thank you!!

Hello! Here’s Nessian with 21, “No, I’m not letting you go. It’s to early to get out of bed.”. Thanks for the request, I hope you’ll enjoy it!

Mate’s command :

« Nesta, I have to go, » chuckled the Illyrian.

“There’s no need for you to get up.”

“You know I have to, Rhysand and Anzriel are waiting for me at thecamp.”

“Don’t care”, she rumbled, tangling their legs so he wouldn’tbe able to sit.

It had been four weeks since he had last spent an entire night withher on their bed, and she had missed him. A lot. She knew he had missed her just as much, she had felt it through thebond, and if she had needed a confirmation for the longing she hadfelt from him, the way he had crushed her lips with his when he hadentered her room was it.

“Soldiers won’t train without me,” he tried, his hand on herthigh.

“The war is over, and I’m making sure everyday I spend away fromyou it stays that way, so let’s just enjoy the results of ourwork.”

The proposition was tempting. Cauldron, it was what he’d asked forweeks. But Illyrians were watching his moves, trying to see if beingmated had softened him.

“I’m sorry sweetheart. Trust me, I’d prefer to stay here withyou, but...”

“No, I’m not letting you go. It’s too early to get out of bed,”she retaliated, pushing him on the mattress.

Before he could make a move, she climbed on top of him and kissedhim, tangling her fingers in his hair. Sensing her warm body on his,her curves pressed against him made his mind go crazy, and he let outa moan when she gently tugged on his hair.

“You’re staying here with me, that’s it,” she whisperedbetween kisses.

Cassian opened his eyes slightly, observing his mate on top of him,her lashes partly hiding her blue-grey eyes. He said nothing atfirst, letting her caress his face and play with his hair, his ownhands going up and down on her back.

After all, Rhysand and Azriel were more than capable, so maybe hecould take a day for himself…

“Is that an order?” He finally asked with a crocked smile.

“It is.”

“I guess I can’t get away with an order given by my mate,” hemurmured.

“Indeed.”

He noted a subtle change about her scent as she went for his lipsagain, awakening every primal instincts inside him. Tightening hisgrip on her body, he opened his mouth for her and gave up. Nestawasted no time, claiming his mouth with so much fierce Cassian felthis blood starting to boil for her. It was fascinating how much powershe had on him, how easily she could get whatever she wanted from himwith one touch.

Without breaking the kiss, he wrapped an arm around her waist and hereversed their positions, pressing her against the mattress. She madea small noise but didn’t stop, letting her hands travel from hishair to his neck and shoulders, making it hard for him not toshudder.

Pulling away just enough to take a breath, Cassian froze at the sightof Nesta, cheeks a bit flushed, eyes bright and a big smileilluminating her face.

“What is it?” She asked, her voice full of amusement.

“Have I ever said that I love seeing you like that?”

“I’m sure everyone know you appreciate me naked.”

“I’m serious Nesta,” replied Cassian, taking the hand she hadset on his chest and kissing it.

Her laugh died as her look focused on his gesture. She staid silent,a faint smile still on her lips as they intertwined their fingers,waiting to see what he would do or say next.

“I love seeing you happy, with a smile on your face. I love it evenmore knowing I’m the only one that get to see you like that.”

“Well, it’s not exactly true you know.”

Cassian frowned at that, not understanding what she was saying, whichmade her laugh a bit more.

“I do smile and laugh with other people, I do it with my sisters,with Amren, I even laughed with Rhysand once.”

Earing her pronounce the name of another male made Cassian stiffen,but he controlled himself, trying his best not to let his jealousyshow on his face. He must not have tried hard enough, given the lookshe gave him before laughing as he hid his face in the crook of herneck.

“Feyre told me you played a bit with Rhysand just after theymated,” she murmured in his ear.

“And it must’ve been such a good opportunity for my brother toget his revenge when he learned you were my mate.”

“Be glad I said no when he proposed to hug me during diner to makeyou understand what it was like to be newly mated with males around.”

Cassian grumbled in response, staying comfortably installed againsther skin, smelling her scent and deposing quick kisses on the side ofher neck and her shoulder.

“Maybe I should’ve let Rhysand do it, just to see you on edge.”

“Could you stop saying his name while we’re on our bed please?”

A laugh went through Nesta as he sighed, raising his head to see her.

“What is it with your brother’s name? Am I pronouncing Rhysandincorrectly?” She pushed, caressing his face at the same time.

Cassian groaned and kissed her hard, wanting her to stop before theurge to go find his brother and fight him was too much to bear with.

“Hey, calm down possessive bat,” she whispered, her arms aroundhim. “I may laugh with and smile to others, but I only am in lovewith you.”

And it was all it took to calm him, her words reinforced by a wave ofpure affection and love sent through their bond.

“Then everything’s good,” he smiled, his eyes alternativelylooking at her eyes and lips.

Nodding, Nesta nudged his nose with hers, pushing her foreheadagainst his. The tenderness she was showing deeply moved Cassian, andhe couldn’t even find words to express how much love and pride hewas feeling for having her by his side.

Deposing a soft kiss on her forehead, he played a bit with her hair,taking his time to caress every inch of her body, his gaze neverleaving hers, making sure every move he was making was wanted andaccepted before doing it. He moved slowly, every image of Nesta beingengraved in his mind as she closed her eyes and let her head fall onthe pillows.

He kissed and caressed and whispered sweet nothings to her duringhours and hours, for they had all the time to be together now, and heintended to enjoy every second of it.

That’s it! Thanks for reading, and don’t hesitate to ask for some fluffy Nessian with this post!

taglist: @dreamerforever-5 / @maastrash / @my-fan-side / @tessas-herondales / @illyrian-bookworm / @girlnovels / @to-the-stars-who-wish / @strangeenemy

#acofas #acomaf #acotar #acowar #cassian #sjmaas #nessian #nesta #nesta x cassian #fluff

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itsyouraveragebooklover · 6 years

Text

Timeline - Chapter 4

A/N: As always thank you for the support! It means so much to me. Sorry for late updates, life is a kicker sometimes. It’s summer so hopefully, I can update more often :) As always the characters do not belong to me. Without further ado lets jump right in~

Tagged: @aelinashgalathynius @my-fan-side @bookofmaas @spidertomholland @archeron-queen @saltydreamcollector

One line summary: This is the timeline of their most important journey.

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4: Part 1, Part 2 coming soon

“When your wife is pregnant... don’t eat the last anything.” — anonymous

(LOL)

Chapter 4 / Part 1: 14 weeks

The cool marble underneath his grip grounded him. It gave him a raw comfort and something to release his unused power on. Experimentally, he tested his strength wondering if he could shatter the stone in pieces but refrained from creating such a mess. Instead, he leans against it, head hung between his arms in silence.

The feeling of his muscles stretching out further soothed him. The feeling of the tension releasing was exactly what he needed to awaken his body. With a final shift in stance, Cassian lifted himself up to come face to face with his reflection.

He surprisingly looked the same, not an ounce of sleep deprivation etched into his features. For the many long nights and sleepless mornings, he would think it would show underneath his eyes or in his slumped shoulders but there was nothing different.

He had his training to thank for that. From his experience of surviving the Blood Rite to being promoted Commander of the Night Court armies, Cassian has faced countless days where sleep became his number one enemy. Close your eyes once and an assassin could stick a poisoned arrow straight into your heart.

As Cassian stared off into his reflection he noticed the persistent stubble already growing back along his chin. He shaved nearly two days ago and hardly enjoyed his smooth skin. It gets to a point where he questions his decision to shave at all.

Maybe he should just let it grow out for once. It wouldn’t hurt anyone to do so. In fact, it’d make him all the more intimidating.

“No it would not,” a voice called from beyond the closed door to his left.

Cassian lifted his head to peer at the barrier between him and the sound as if he could see the figure behind. Really? He voiced inside his mind while rubbing the stubble. The more he massaged, the more appealing the decision to grow it out became.

“Really,” the voice spoke again. “You aren’t intimidating in the least.”

I’ll show you intimidating Nesta, he shot down the bond.

“I dare you,” she announced, tone sharp and mischievous.

Cassian silently chuckled to himself. It’s amazing the way she riles him up sometimes.

While you’re at it, I could go for another round, her voice floated around his head like a cloud.

“Another so soon? Can’t say I’m surprised,” he turned to face the faucet and twisted the handles. With quick work, he cupped his hands together letting the water pool into his calloused fingers and lifted it up to his face. A couple splashes and his body felt more awake than it did moments ago.

Whilst the cool water drips off his nose and chin, Cassian grasps his long hair and ties it off into a loose bun. Once satisfied he struts out of their bathing chamber and into their room.

Spread out on the bed laid Nesta. Her back tucked into the pillows propped up from behind and her body covered with layers of blankets. Beside her sat a tray of empty porcelain dishes licked clean. There wasn’t any food left in them. Boy, can she eat.

Cassian smirked to himself whilst retrieving the tray beside her and vanished into the kitchen to retrieve a new one placed ontop the counter. To his satisfaction, the various plates scattered were still fresh and piping with steam. Even though he was saving this for himself, Nesta needed it more. She was eating for two and needed all the nutrients she could get. He would find something for himself later.

Cassian entered their room and sat beside Nesta, placing the tray in front of her frame. Immediately, she lunged for the cinnamon oats topped with dried fruits, nuts, and syrup. Though she ate swiftly, Nesta still had a grace to her. She maintained manners throughout the entire meal.

And as she ate spoonful after spoonful from the meal he cooked, his heart warmed.

Nesta had this foreign glow to her that he’s never seen before. Her skin radiated light like the brightest star in the night sky. Her hair became thicker than his own and her nails weren’t as brittle as before. Even her grey eyes usually tainted with this unexplained cloudiness were clear of the storm.

The realization hit him like a stab to the side. The life Nesta was giving to the little one developing inside her belly was instead giving life back to her.

It made everything worth it. It made the long nights spent rubbing her stomach worth it. It made the evenings spent soaking her feet and flying around retrieving the food she craved most worth it. It was all worth it.

And now he couldn’t wait for the end.

The clatter of porcelain and glass took him out of his thoughts. He watched Nesta place a plate that once consisted of roasted potatoes with rosemary down onto the half-empty tray. She then grabbed a bowl of honey glazed figs. Right then and there Cassian was prepared to cook more until a whisper left her lips, “Today’s the day.”

It sounded more of a question than a statement.

Cassian sensed the slight anxiety creeping inside. In response, he took her hands into his own and kneeled down on both knees beside their bed. The two were face to face at equal height. His hazel eyes rimmed with gold burned like the sun on a hot summers day. It melted her insides at times, but when he tamed that fire into something subtle, a look solely reserved for her, it set her ablaze.

“Only if you want it to be,” he spoke softly.

Nesta let the thought ponder but shook her head after a moment. “They will find out anyway,” she gestured to the small bump growing almost every day. “I think it’s time. Elain has already been questioning our decision to purchase a new cottage outside Velaris.”

Cassian nodded in agreement. He could tell Azriel formed some of his own suspicions which could be connected to Elain’s constant questioning. Those two were constantly together so he had no doubt they were bouncing theories off one another every day.

“As long as you’re ready,” Cassian paused rubbing soothing circles into her hands, “I will be ready too.”

Nesta quieted, trying to process the thoughts rushing throughout her head. Down the bond, Cassian felt a fraction of her true emotions. She wasn’t scared. She wasn’t nervous. She just didn’t know how to go about these things. But he didn’t know either.

I’m right with you, he spoke down the bond hoping it would reach. No matter what happens, we’ll get through this together. Like we always do.

She tightened her grip on his hands and tore her eyes away from the floating clouds outside her window. The sky was so blue. It provided a sense of peace for them both.

With a deep breath, she spoke, “I’m ready as I’ll ever be.”

. . .

“Welcome back,” a voice called out as soon as Cassian and Nesta entered the room.

The pair immediately glanced over to the speaker. Rhysand once sprawled over a sofa with a glass of wine in hand shot up to his feet to greet Cassian in a firm embrace. The two patted each other’s back, careful to avoid their wings whilst grinning at one another.

“Good to be back,” Cassian replied greeting everyone in the process. He guided Nesta over to an unoccupied sofa next to a pit where a fire danced and swayed along the wood. The embers crackled and flared to life just as the unexplained power buried deep inside her does.

Pulling her gaze away from the flames Nesta made sure to smooth out the ruffles in her gown making sure her bump wasn’t too visible. Thankfully, it isn’t large enough to warrant any suspicion. Yet she feels the eyes of the Inner Circle burn into her.

To break the gaze Feyre and Elain approached her and plopped down into a chair beside herself and Cassian.

“So rumor has it that you two purchased a new townhouse outside the city,” Feyre smiled lightly.

“Yeah what’s that all about?” Amren piped in as well.

Cassian glanced to Nesta. Already huh?

She simply shot him a knowing look. You know more than anyone how nothing gets past them, she thought.

Cassian cleared his throat and extended an arm around Nesta while leaning back in the cushion. She could tell he was preparing himself for an onslaught of questions just as he prepares himself for battle.

“We thought we’d start fresh. Something new,” he answered.

“Why outside the city then?” Amren grinned to herself whilst circling her wine around. Her eyes were solely locked with Nesta’s.

“Thought the countryside would provide some peace,” he shrugged. “I still own the apartment in Velaris. Just thought a vacation house would do us some good.”

“I can tell you’re hiding something Cassian,” Mor spoke up from across the room.

“She’s right, I can smell it right off you,” Amren chided still directing her focus at Nesta.

Cassian threw his hands in the air. “I already knew this would happen but you guys are damn persistent. I thought I could have some fun,” he grumbled to himself with a smile until lifting his spine from the cushion. He steeled himself as he spoke, “We bought the property for more space.”

“More space?” Feyre questioned.

Cassian nodded and continued, “We’re going to need it because…”

Nesta cut him off by placing a hand on his arm. Cassian looked at her as his words died off. He wasn’t confused as to why she stopped him. It was clear enough.

She wanted to be the one to tell them. And she had every right to do so.

Nesta turned to face everyone and looked each one of them in the eyes until she was ready.

“It's because..." she paused finding the words, then continued, "because we’re pregnant.”

#Nessian #Nesta #Nesta Archeon #Cassian #Nesta x Cassian #Cassian x Nesta #Nessian fanfiction #Nessian fanfic #Fanfiction #Fanfic #acotar #acomaf #acowar #a court of thorns and roses #a court of mist and fury #a court of wings and ruin #Nessian fluff #Fluff

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fuzzballsheltiepants · 7 years

Text

Preparations (Vows #1)

The next Nessian (finally!) Previous Chapter is here. Master list of all my fanfic is here. Hope you all enjoy this one! Nearly everyone makes an appearance. It was supposed to be the last chapter but it got waaay too long (this half is over 5k words) so I split it.

Nesta tapped her pen against the paper. “I don’t see why I have to do this,” she said flatly.

Feyre sighed, already exasperated, and set her teacup down with a click. “You’re the one who burst in here this afternoon and told me you had to get married as soon as possible. Making a list of what you need to get done is the bare minimum if you really expect to be ready in two weeks.”

“Okay, fine,” Nesta grumbled. She contemplated just giving up on the whole thing, shredding the papers she’d been writing on, and telling Cassian they should just run away, but she supposed now her sister knew that option was done for. “So far we’ve got: location to figure out, catering, dress -”

“Just ask Rhys about the dress,” Feyre cut in, “he probably already has something.”

“Why would he have a dress for me?” Nesta asked, a bit suspiciously. The tendency of everyone in the Inner Circle to be constantly in everybody else’s business had not grown on her with exposure.

“Well, it’s been weeks since you announced you planned to get married,” Feyre said, like that was a normal explanation. Evidently Nesta should automatically expect her brother-in-law to produce a wedding dress for her, just like that.

Nesta sat back in her chair and looked at her sister through narrowed eyes. “What is it with Rhys and clothes? Where does he get them all?”

Feyre just shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve never asked. His taste is better than mine anyway.”

An image of her sister’s tall, elegant mate sitting in a private room somewhere sewing furiously popped into Nesta’s mind, and she snorted. Her sister looked at her in some confusion and she just waved her hand in dismissal. “Should I cross ‘dress’ off then?”

“No, let’s make sure I’m right first. And that you like it. He’ll be here any minute anyway for your session.” Ugh, magic lessons. She felt awkward enough with Amren, having Rhys staring at her too didn’t really sound appealing, but she did want to start understanding what she could - and should - do with the fact that she now could hear everybody’s life force. Certainly before she killed someone by mistake. Feyre went on. “We don’t need to worry about flowers, Elain will take care of that. And I bet Mor has some ideas about catering. Do you want to use the priestess Elain and Lucien had?”

“Is that the same one you used?”

“Yes.”

“Might as well be consistent then.” Nesta wrote down ‘Priestess’ with a small arrow that led to ‘whoever Feyre says.’ She tapped the pen against her teeth. “What else is there?”

“Do you have a guest list yet?” Nesta most certainly did; she hid her grin as she slid it over to her sister, who read it out loud. “‘Feyre, Elain, Rhys, The Bastard,’ really, Nesta, is that necessary? ‘Azriel, Amren, Mor,’ all plus one, ‘Nuala, Cerridwen,’ oh good, I’m glad you’re inviting them, ‘Clotho and the rest of the librarians…’” She looked up and smiled. “What a great idea.” Nesta just shrugged, a little embarrassed. “Who’s ‘Tamirah' and why is her name surrounded by little hearts?’”

“Oh, that’s just a special one for Cassian,” Nesta replied with a bit of an evil grin.

“Do I even want to know?”

“Probably not.”

“And ‘Willow.’ You’re inviting your cat?”

“Of course. She’s part of the family.”

Shaking her head, Feyre grabbed the to-do list Nesta was now doodling on and scanned the sheet. “What do you want to do about invitations?”

Nesta made a face. “Do you really think we need them? It’s mostly just the family anyway.”

Feyre looked rather shocked. “Of course you need invitations! Cerridwen did them for Elain’s wedding, I’m sure she’d be happy to do yours. And it’s not like we need one for Willow.” She chuckled.

“Why doesn’t Willow get one if everyone else does?” Nesta asked, deadpan.

“Does she really need one? She can’t read.”

“Probably not, but it seems rude to exclude her if we do them for everyone else.” Nesta stole her paper back and noted ‘Cerridwen’ next to ‘Invitations.’

“Oh, and you’ll need to write your vows.”

Nesta’s stomach dropped. She had never considered that; never thought about baring her soul in front of all those people, even if it was mostly just family. “Write my…don’t the High Fae have some sort of set ceremony? I thought I was just going to have to say, ‘I do’ or something.”

Her sister laughed. “Didn’t you notice that Elain and Lucien had written their vows?”

“Well, yes, but that’s Elain and Lucien, they have no issue with being all, I don’t know, verbal. They also had about a thousand people at their ceremony. I thought I could get out of it.” She thought for a moment; Elain’s was the only Fae ceremony she had been to. “Did you write your own vows?”

She didn’t understand the expression that crossed Feyre’s face at what was intended to be an innocent question. It looked almost like guilt. “We didn’t have time to write anything, actually. Since we did it so fast, we just kind of said what was in our hearts at the moment. I honestly don’t even remember what we said.”

Nesta pondered that. While there was something appealing about sneaking out in the middle of the night and spontaneously getting married, or mated, or whatever you wanted to call it, she didn’t want to not be able to remember it. She didn’t want the handful of people she loved to not be a part of it. “What would you write if you had to do it over again?”

Feyre’s voice was hesitant, contemplative. “I think I’d want to tell the story of how I came to love him. Not so much the mating bond - as deep as it is, I think that’s more biological than anything. But how he kept me from breaking and taught me and brought me out of the despair I had fallen into. How he always had so much faith in me, and how he always just knew me. Knew what I needed, even if it wasn’t what I wanted. Does that make sense?”

Nesta nodded thoughtfully. Grabbing a fresh sheet of paper, she began to write. Feyre poured herself a fresh cup of mint tea and sipped while she waited. When she was nearly down to the dregs, her sister passed the paper to her then watched her, expressionless, while she read it. Feyre looked up. “This is beautiful,” she said softly. “It’s perfect.” Nesta took the paper and tucked it away. Before they could return to their planning, Rhys and Amren appeared.

“What’s all this?” Amren asked, looking at the scattered papers.

“Oh, we’re just planning Nesta and Cassian’s wedding,” Feyre said breezily. “We’ve got about two weeks.”

Rhys whistled. “Looks like magic training is going to wait a bit. We’ve got more important work to do.” The three females looked at him expectantly. He grinned. “Want to see the dresses I picked out?”

Amren rolled her eyes. “If you are all going to be gushing over wedding dresses, I’m going to go to Summer Court. See you in a couple of weeks.” She winnowed away in the middle of Nesta’s protest. Rhys just shrugged, looking bemusedly at the spot she had just vacated.

“I was still planning on doing some training, but I guess that gives us a little more flexibility. Come on, let’s go upstairs.” The sisters followed him into Nesta’s old room, where he pulled three different dresses from a pocket realm and hung them on the armoire door. All three were stunning, but Nesta only had eyes for the one on the left.

“That’s it,” she said, pointing. He handed it to her and she stalked towards the bathing room, Nuala appearing out of nowhere to assist her. Feyre looked at her mate.

“That was easy,” she said.

“She’s easy to select for,” he said. “She always favors the more simple, elegant styles.”

“You knew she was going to pick that one?” He nodded and Feyre surveyed the other two. “Well, they’re all gorgeous, but I think it’s the one I would’ve chosen for her too.”

Mor burst through the door just as Nesta emerged from the bathing room in her regular clothes. “Hey, bitch, when were you going to tell me you’re planning your wedding?”

Nesta blinked. “Was I supposed to tell you before I told my sisters?”

“Of course,” Mor said, breezing past her cousin and Feyre to flop on the bed. “I’m the party planner extraordinaire around here.”

Giving a small mocking bow, Nesta replied, “My apologies, I did not know that was one of your formal titles. I hereby appoint you queen of the catering. May you prosper.”

Mor returned the bow as best she could from the bed, with a flourish of her hand. “I shall not disappoint.”

Feyre broke in before the verbal sparring could come to a head. “Where’s the dress? Is something wrong?”

“No.”

“Wait, I missed the dress?” Mor interjected.

“Then can’t we see it?” Feyre asked almost simultaneously.

“No.” Nesta could tell Feyre was biting her cheek to keep from snapping at her, and tried hard to not snap her response, though she hated having to defend herself about it. “Half the people invited are in this room right now. The dress fits, it’s exactly what I want, and you’ll see it in two weeks. And don’t you dare use your Daemati powers on me. Or Nuala.”

Feyre and Mor both turned to Rhys, who had been watching the three females with some amusement. He shoved his hands in his pockets with his usual grace. “It’s up to Nesta. I’m staying out of it.”

“Ugh, what good is being High Lady if I can’t even make my own sister show me how she looks in her wedding dress?” Feyre asked no one in particular.

*****

Cassian was sitting in the family library in the House of Wind, thinking, a blank pad of paper and a pen on the low table in front of him. There was so much he wanted to say to Nesta when they bound themselves to each other in just one short week, but he could not for the life of him figure out how. He had cut his training session with Brisa short, sending her to spar with Sabine and Az, while he had flown here to do - exactly nothing. He growled at the paper, as if he could somehow intimidate it into writing his vows for him.

The door swung open and Lucien walked in. He and Elain had returned from the Dawn Court late the night before. “This is…the exact last place I would expect to find you,” Lucien said by way of greeting. Cassian couldn’t even find a snappy retort. Damnit. He rubbed his face with his hands, then let them drop into his lap. “Why does it seem like every time I see you, something is always bothering you?”

“Because every time you see me, you’re in the room. It’s a paradox.” There, at least he was able to come up with something.

“My my, another big word. Though I suppose I set myself up for that one.” He studied the empty paper, russet eye narrowing. “Let me guess, you’re working on a dissertation on the usefulness of wings.”

Cassian huffed what might have been a laugh. “I wish, I’d have a thousand pages by now. No, I’m trying to write my vows.”

The red-haired male slipped into the seat next to him and put his feet up on the table. “Well, since I just did this a few weeks ago, let me give you some advice.”

“Okay,” he replied, eyeing the court-trained male warily.

“I’d advise against going with, ‘You’re my mate. Let’s fuck.’ It kind of takes away from the grandeur of the moment.”

Now Cassian laughed for real. “I wouldn’t want to steal your line anyway. I was practically unconscious at the time, but wasn’t that basically what you said when Elain came out of the Cauldron?”

A smirk played on Lucien’s lips. “I told you I was speaking from experience.” He crossed his arms and looked straight into Cassian’s steady hazel eyes. “Why do you want to marry her? What first drew you to her, though I doubt you got a lot of encouragement? You’ve been alive and from what I’ve gathered, fucking freely for over five hundred years. Why decide now to bind yourself to her?”

The slight disdain in his tone coupled with the emphasis on the last word had anger flaring, and Cassian leaned forward, every inch the warrior. He opened his mouth, and Lucien pointed at the paper. “Don’t tell me, write.” His mouth tightened, but he took up his pen and began to work. There was a lot of crossing out and long pauses, but eventually he stopped, surveyed his work, then passed the paper to Lucien, who had been watching the process with no little amusement.

“I hope that wasn’t as painful as it looked,” he said, before reading the lines. “Mother’s tits, your handwriting is atrocious.” His expression changed from its usual irreverence as his eyes scanned the page, and he handed it back wordlessly. Cassian looked at him with a question on his face, and Lucien merely nodded. Standing, he walked towards the stacks, dropping a hand briefly on Cassian’s shoulder as he passed.

*****

Elain walked into the kitchen garden, bearing a tray full of iced tea that she set out for everyone before settling into a chair herself. It was an unusually warm day for this late in the fall and everyone was soaking up the last of the sun’s rays. She looked even more beautiful than ever, Nesta thought; more grounded, which seemed ironic given how much time Elain always spent with the earth. Unlike herself, Elain had always imagined and wished to be married with children and a nice manor house and everything. Though her current situation was not how she planned it when they were younger, being bonded forever to a male as magnetic as the fox-faced bastard didn’t seem to be disagreeing with her at all. Even if he was just about the polar opposite of Graysen. Nesta wasn’t sure which of the two males she despised more, Graysen for abandoning her sister or Lucien for winning her in the end.

“So, I know you were talking about having the ceremony at the House of Wind,” Elain said, “but I’d like to make another suggestion.” Nesta, Feyre and Mor all looked at her expectantly. “There’s that walled garden I finished a few months ago, it’s totally enclosed so it would be nice and private, and there should be room for everyone since it’s such a small group.”

“That sounds like a great idea!” Mor exclaimed.   Feyre looked a little more hesitant. “Isn’t it a little late in the season for a garden to be practical?” Nesta was internally grateful to her for asking the question; after all, it was close to winter.

Elain leaned forward eagerly. “No, not at all! I designed it to be usable in all seasons, and it’s spelled to protect it from any extreme cold. Right now it’s got beautiful foliage, and some nice rich flowers in reds and purples and yellows and there are some patches of white. They should go nicely with Cassian’s Siphons. Plus I can add some potted or cut flowers of whatever colors you want.”

Nesta smiled at her sister, at her palpable joy and excitement, as she said, “That sounds perfect, and I’ll trust your judgment as to what flowers are appropriate.” She thought Elain was going to take flight right there and disappear to prep the garden. It was obviously an effort her her sister to keep in her seat, but she managed to refocus on the rest of the task at hand.

The three of them went through the extensive menu Mor proposed, then Elain asked to see the guest list. She studied it for a moment, then asked, “Why is there a burned out hole at the bottom of the list?”

Playing with a piece of her hair, Nesta replied airily, “Oh, Cassian took exception to one of my invitees.”

“But he’s okay with the cat coming?” Feyre asked drily.

Nesta leveled one of her flat looks at her. “Of course.” She didn’t understand her sister’s evident irritation at Willow’s inclusion; she’d always seemed to enjoy her playful antics when they spent time together.

Elain piped up, “I’ll manage Willow! Oh, I’d love to have her there.” Feyre subsided with a shrug and a wry smile, won over by her sweetness, just as everyone always was.

A shadow appeared overhead, and everyone looked up as Cassian touched down. “Everything going well?” he asked, bending down to brush a kiss to the top of Nesta’s head.

The four women nodded in unison, then Nesta added, “Other than Feyre being beaten into submission about Willow being issued an invitation.” He laughed.

“Can I be updated on the plans?” he requested as he sat on the edge of the table, all chairs being occupied. Elain and Mor immediately began running through all the details while Nesta sat back, a little bemused. Elain had been home for less than twenty four hours and was already more involved with the plans than she was. She met Cassian’s eyes and her mate gave a tiny shrug. They were lucky to be able to basically wind up the other females and let them go, though she did appreciate having final say. Not that she had had to overrule much of anything.

“We haven’t discussed one very important thing,” Mor said. “Alcohol.” Feyre nodded fervently. “I’ve already got wine planned, both sparkling and regular. What else do you want?”

Lucien winnowed in, as if summoned by the mention of liquor, and after kissing Elain and settling her in his lap he joined in. Only Rhys was absent, having left after their lesson to discuss some sort of assignment for the spymaster. She found herself missing him a little for some reason. He had been surprising her with his patience and understanding during their lessons. Together they had realized her power worked almost directly opposite his - when he wanted to kill, he pushed out with his power, while it seemed she needed to pull in. They speculated that was why she was unsuccessful against the King, as lashing out could affect a body but not terminally. Rhys could also affect a huge number at once, while she could sense many but only affect one at a time. The best thing from a day to day standpoint was she was discovering that she did possess a few of the extra abilities, like accessing pocket realms. He was also pretty sure she’d be able to winnow given how easily she could manipulate living energy, but she hadn’t managed yet.

Cassian began listing an impressive additional supply of spirits and Nesta refocused onto the conversation. Feyre chimed in with some of Rhys’s favorites. Nesta was fine with just the wine. She didn’t want to forget any of the ceremony, and after her experience with the Gravediggers she doubted her ability to handle anything stronger. Watching the others laugh and discuss the merits of various liquors warmed her; she loved her mate’s enthusiasm for all of this. In the human world, the men generally acted as if all this was the women’s territory and beneath them. Here, the males seemed to see the planning as not just a responsibility but a valued right. The two present males started an enthusiastic discussion of the merits of licorice in some sort of drink she’d never heard of before, and she sat back contentedly and let the noise and joy flow over her like water.

*****

The night before the wedding, Feyre had insisted that Nesta stay with her and Elain at the townhouse, just as they had for Elain’s wedding, so Cassian went back to the apartment alone. Willow greeted him with her usual demands for food and petting, then settled herself on the bookcase for a thorough wash and a nap. He hoped she would enjoy herself at the ceremony; she certainly had never seemed fazed by traveling to the cabin or the townhouse, so he suspected she would take it in stride. He ate and had just settled down on the couch with a glass of wine to read when he heard footsteps on the roof and headed up to check it out.

Azriel and Rhys were making themselves comfortable on the chairs Nesta had insisted be added to the chaise in the rooftop garden. They had brought a bottle of something stronger than the wine, no doubt secreted out from under Rhys’s bed. Cassian took the glass Rhys was holding out and claimed the chaise. Rhys held up his glass in a silent toast, and the other two echoed the gesture before they drank in unison. “Feyre kicked me out for the night,” he said ruefully. “So Az and I decided to come down and keep you company on your last night alone. Ready for tomorrow?”

“Sure,” he said, with unfeigned nonchalance. “I mean, we’ve been living together for a few months now. This is just a ceremony to make it all official, right? I don’t really expect anything to change other than getting used to wearing a ring.” He actually couldn’t wait for that part; he loved the rings Rhys had helped him select.

The High Lord looked contemplative. “I don’t know, my situation was so different. I mean, we’d only really been together a few days before we had the ceremony, and it was all so rushed…But I definitely felt like having it official made it seem so much more permanent.” He thought for a moment before continuing, “Somehow, when that priestess declared us married and mated, it was like the bond connected in our bones, not just our hearts. Does that make sense?”

It was hard for Cassian to imagine the bond being any deeper or more enduring, but he nodded and took a sip of his drink. He was really going to have to figure out his brother’s source of alcohol at some point, because damn, that shit was good. There was a patter of tiny feet and Willow appeared on the roof, pausing to look around and sniff for a moment, tail twitching. Her domain adequately surveyed, she scampered to Azriel and leaped onto his lap, arching her body up to bump him in the face with her little head. He looked to Cassian with a long-suffering expression, but his hand stroked her automatically and her wild purr reverberated through the garden.

“Why must your cat torture me?” he asked in that cold voice, while scritching under her chin with his scarred fingers.

“She likes you,” Cassian replied, “is that a bad thing?” Willow stuffed her tail up Azriel’s nose while vigorously kneading his knee with her tiny needle claws and he glared at his brother, who was struggling not to laugh. “Are you bringing anyone tomorrow?”

“I’m thinking Willow should be my date at this point,” he replied. The cat responded by sprawling out on her back along his thigh, fluffy gray belly exposed, feet curling in the air.

The others both laughed but Cassian sobered quickly. He studied his brother. “Mor’s bringing someone,” he said abruptly. Rhys’s head snapped up, a warning in his eyes.

Az’s fingers didn’t pause in their massage of the blissful cat’s neck. “I know.” There was not a trace of emotion in his voice or on his face.

Cassian opened his mouth, but Rhys interrupted. “Leave it alone.”

Az looked between his two brothers for a long moment. “I always hoped you two would understand,” he said, the slightest hint of disappointment in his voice, his shadows curling around his shoulders. “I know Feyre doesn’t, but she’s young, and has a human heart.”

“Understand what?” Cassian asked, quite gently for him.

“I am…content, with how things are,” he replied quietly. “I have no need to share my life with anyone beyond the family.”

“But -” Cassian started to protest and Az spoke over him, perhaps for the first time in history.

“I do not need what you need, brother. I am happy for you, for all of you,” he looked to Rhys, “but I have no desire for that type of bond myself. I thought you could understand that.”

The other two exchanged looks. “But what about Mor?” Cassian finally asked.

“Any feelings I had for Mor beyond the familial faded a long time ago. It’s just that none of you noticed.” There was a cold anger rising in his face, despite the dry humor in his voice. “You have been assuming for all these years that I sought what you did. But I have all I need with the two of you. Brothers who truly care for me.” Cassian thought of Az’s biological brothers and his eyes flicked to the scarred hands beneath the blue Siphons. Rhys’s attention was similarly focused. “And you,” he turned to Rhys, who pulled his violet eyes up to meet his gaze, “brought me the added benefit of Feyre, who despite the fact that she wants for me what I do not desire for myself, also truly cares.”

Cassian was struggling to understand this. He thought back to how his life had been before Feyre had fallen into it and brought her sisters with her; back to before Rhys had disappeared Under the Mountain. He had been comfortable, yes, but always restless; he would never have described himself as content. Even when he was sated following a good fight or a good fuck or preferably both, as soon as the fatigue wore off the buzzing energy had returned. But he had never seen that with Az, who would take a lover, yes, but without that driving need. Who while he fought and practiced with an eye to perfection, it was only to hone a necessary skill. He had always assumed the shadowsinger just hid it better, that the cold rage that lurked beneath the impassive surface was a result of the same emptiness he felt.

Perhaps it was instead a result of the fact that even those who loved him best didn’t really see him.

“Do not dare to condescend to me with your pity,” Azriel snapped, and Cassian bristled until he realized he was not the one being addressed. He looked to Rhys, to the muscle feathering in his clenched jaw. “I am not diminished because I am not bound to another.” Willow startled at the shift in mood, leaping down and skittering across to settle underneath the chaise. Rhys bowed his head under the fierce glare.

“No, you are not,” he said quietly, almost humbly. “You most certainly are not. I just…I can’t believe I was wrong all this time. And the way you look at Mor, the sadness…I still don’t understand it.”

His voice softer, warmer, Az responded, “I am sad for Mor because I pity anyone who cannot acknowledge even to themselves who they truly are. Not because of any unfulfilled wishes of my own.” Cassian could have laughed at Rhys’s expression of utter bafflement, and even Azriel smiled a little. “Did you think I haven’t noticed Mor bedding females all these years?”

Now it was true shock on Rhys’s elegant face, and Cassian did laugh out loud at his dropped jaw. “What?”

“You may have noticed,” Cassian said wryly to Az, “but clearly our brother here has been out of the loop.” He turned to Rhys. “Did you never wonder why Mor is always hanging out at Rita’s?”

“What about Rita’s?”

The two Illyrians exchanged very amused looks before Cassian decided to take mercy on Rhys. “Rita’s is basically a hot spot for those who are looking for same-sex options. Did you not ever wonder why you constantly had males inviting you to bed there?”

Rhys shook his head, a trace of his usual arrogance reappearing as he replied, “No, I get invitations from everyone no matter where I am. I never really thought about it. Though considering you also did whenever we were there, I suppose I should have.”

Cassian winked at him. “I too get invitations from everyone everywhere, brother.”

Az snorted. “You accept them though, Cass. Rhys doesn’t.” Rhys turned to him, looking startled again. Cassian just shrugged.

“You better get over yourself,” he said to Rhys, “because Mor is bringing Ahna tomorrow.”

“Ahna? As in, Vivianne’s sister?” He nodded, and Rhys turned speculative. “I wonder what Feyre is going to say to that.”

Clearing his throat, Cassian said, “Um, as far as I know, it was Feyre’s idea. And Nesta had Cerridwen write the invitation to her directly.” Laughing again at Rhys’s dismay at learning he really was the last to know, he rose and poured them all another knuckle’s length. He stood behind Az’s chair, dropping a broad hand on his shoulder, and looked at these males that he had loved almost all his life. They had fought for each other and pushed each other and each had become a better version of themselves thanks to the other two. He knew that without Rhys and Az, and Rhys’s mother, he would never have amounted to someone worthy of the female he was to marry tomorrow. No matter how big the void Nesta filled in his soul, it would never diminish what he felt for his brothers.

Clearing his throat, he raised his glass. “I know we haven’t done this much since the war, or really for a lot longer than that, but I want you to know that I love you both, no matter what. To truth among brothers,” he said. The others raised their glasses, murmuring, “To truth,” in reply. As Cassian tilted his head back to drain his glass, a shooting star passed overhead, echoing the fiery trail of the liquor down his throat. All three of them froze, staring at the sky, as awed by the flash of beauty above them as they had been centuries ago when they first stood together beneath the stars.

#nessian #nesta archeron #nesta x cassian #cassian #acowar #fanfic #azriel

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