#it still says his name in the flashbacks and audio tapes

[static-errorcode-13]

fanmade one investigation idea

meet ally

And here we go

Ally walks in, looking concerned on why their here.

Amy: hi

Ally: uh, hi

Amy: my name is Ava Ledger. I'm with the missing person's unit here at the Lucas County Police Department, and, um, could you do me a favor and state your name for the tape?"

Ally: ally evermore

Amy: ok, ally, do you know why your here?

Ally: no, not exactly, I haven't been here since my friend disappeared.

Amy: friend disappeared? Care to explain more on that

Ally: yeah my friend Oscar disappeared a decade ago.

Amy: and care to explain his appearance?

Ally: ummm, old calculator

Amy: well the reason your here is because several people all over the US have gone missing on the 10th of February, now two have returned, and we have reason to believe that ypur friend Oscar might have talked too those two.

Ally: oh, uh ok, never thought that I would go back to a missing person's report

Amy: now going back to your friend Oscar, care to explain what happened the day he went missing

Ally: yeah ok...

{{Flashback starts}}

Ally: it was about 10 years ago, I was on a walk with Oscar, and my other friend Marley and we stopped at the park to relax.

{{Flashback pause}}

Amy: care to explain what Marley's appearance is

Ally: cracked bowling ball

Amy: ok carry on

{{Flashback continue}}

Then an icecream truck came. And today was the anniversary of him getting the promotion as ceo of...

{{Flashback pauses}}

Ally: do I need to alaberate this much?

Amy: no go ahead, this information is helpful

Ally: ok...

{{Flashback continue}}

Ally: so like I said it was the anniversary of Oscar getting promoted of ceo of his job, and we thought it would be a great way to celebrate it with icecream.

Ally: i went to get the icecream, while Marley kept Oscar company. It took about a solid.... ten.... fifteen.... minutes? I really don't Renember how long it took. But either way by the time that I got the icecreams, i started hearing commotion. I ran to check on things and I saw that, Oscar was gone. I asked Marley where he was, and he didn't know he said it was like he poofed out of existence. Everyone wad panicking, and me and Marley had to talk to police

{{Flashback end}}

Amy: did you ever talk to Marley after that?

Ally: yeah but not often. Not until Oscar just reappeared out of nowhere

Amy: did he tell you what happened to him?

Ally: well he said that it was like a dream, including what happened the same day he went missing, so basically, the normal part of that day, he kept saying he was telaported to a competition for a chance to get one wish for anything. But thw fact that he thought the Normal part of the day was a dream... I don't know... i think it's... real? He mentioned a button girl, and a toothpaste guy, but I don't know

Amy: do you guys still talk now that he's back

Ally: we do it's just hard to keep track of where he is

Amy: why's that

Ally: he's... homeless

Amy: now back on track, did he ever mention about two guys asking him questions

Ally: hmmm, I mean last week some guys asked him about the competition show saying that they had the same "dream"

Amy: anything else you'd want to say?

Ally: no

Amy: ok, one of the officers will escort you to the main exit

Ally: thank you

Ally walks away as they talk to another officer

Amy stops recording their audio.

Amy: so now with this information, could it be this is a case that hasn't been notified until now?

Challenge! Make ypur own one investigation script

@lazyslimetime, @the-random-creechur, @sleepypillowynight, @demondevilevil

#hfjone #one investigations #one object show

[infinitetelevision]

Romancing the Egg

Wild Cards. Season 1, Episode 10.

Hmmm. I expected a betrayal. I expected something to do with Ellis' brother changing Max's mind. Got both of those, and not much else. I held out some hope for the show because I liked some parts of it, but not these parts. Season 1 is a fun, mindless watch if that's what you're looking for - just don't think about the plot points too much.

Show so far: ⭐⭐

Episode: ⭐⭐

-Ace Analyst

More spoilery talking points under the cut:

We're just going to walk through the plot points one by one here:

Max has a plan to betray her husband we didn't previously know about. Okay. Sure. No issues with that plot. Kinda nice that it ties in with the random mansions, and kinda cliche that there's an unexpected husband, but no issues with this idea.

Max gets the local police involved in the plan. Okay - what? The local police get informed that an international thief is going to be in town, hear Max's plan to catch him with just one of their own and go, okay, sure? Let's not call Interpol or someone else? Weird, but forgivable in the context of TV logic. They're really trusting her with this one.

Max expects Husband to run and plans for that. This was fine. Made sense. Glad to see that there were actually other police there besides Ellis, even if it was just literally the only two other cops in the whole show.

Max actually stole the real egg before Husband and replaced it with a fake. This, too, is fairly predictable, and fine. In fact, I expected it so much that the flashbacks to her doing so were incredibly boring. I didn't actually care how she got it done - they've been feeding us lines all season that she's a good thief, I believed it, didn't need to see it.

Ellis discovers Max's plan. Predictable, fine, whatever. Liked that he grew suspicious after trying to reach both her and ... whatever the other guy's name was. A little weird that the $33 million evidence was just easy to check out and investigate on his own.

Ellis goes to confront Max. This was... bad. Sure, it makes sense with what they've tried to tell us about how close these two are, but then he just... goes home? Doesn't tell anyone? Is the broken egg still on his desk. Are the authorities aware that Max has betrayed them at all? What was Ellis planning to do - pretend he didn't know? Tell them later? He literally checked out the evidence!

Max discovers something in the audio tapes and changes her mind about leaving. Again, I saw this coming. It's fine but predictable, as was her conversation with Ellis on the boat.

All in all, that kind of sums up the show - fine but predictable. Nothing interesting or exciting happened in the finale. The plots were occasionally engaging, but the characters weren't. There was potential, but they were cliche and one-note. After ten episodes, I still don't know who Max and Ellis are. Max cares about her Dad, smiles a lot, and is good at crime. Ellis cared about his brother, wants his job back because his dad was a cop, and is a rule-follower - except for when he isn't.

There was a moment, in this episode, where they talked about always having each other's backs, but it didn't feel earned to me. We've had ten episodes. The first few was just them settling in together, and between that we've had plenty of mistrust. I didn't get that closeness.

I saw someone say that the most intriguing thing about the show was the side characters, and I don't entirely disagree. The hints of Simmons' past partnership with Ellis was interesting. Max's friend was neat. Even Yates grew on me, though for some reason she just stopped insulting Ellis halfway through the season. The writers were good at subtext with these things, but the actual text wasn't as engaging.

Minor point 1: Didn't like the way this episode was shot. The weird slow-mo's and zoom ins while pulling the 'heist' felt boring and unnecessary.

Minor point 2: Max's husband was literally just there to get caught. That's it. We learned nothing new about Max through the introduction of this character.

Final note. Fun. Boring. No character development. Won't be in a hurry to watch Season 2 if it does end up getting renewed.

#Wild Cards #tv review

[theimaginatrix27]

A peek Into My Childhood

So I recently (a few weeks ago) discovered that the story tapes/CDs I had as a child about various classical composers were 1. part of the same set, and 2. were available online. I mean I'd suspected the first one, but the second delighted me beyond words. I plan on buying/downloading the whole collection, but I wanna gush about these for a minute, because this is a fandom I didn't think of as such but which I may well have thought of some form of fanfic of back in the day, particularly with regard to a girl who was at that time older than me, who was featured in two of the stories.

But first, here's the general idea of this collection. Each tape centres around the work of a particular classical composer (Bach, Beethoven, Vivaldi, Mozart etc) or in one more recent case is just given a classical soundtrack with medieval overtones (It's a story about unicorns with Merlin and King Arthur in it, it's sweet, I only recently acquired it for the first time). With the composer-centric ones, they then create a work of historical fiction designed to educate the child on the life of said composer in an entertaining way. Usually this takes the form of a low-budget audio drama (I say low-budget because there aren't as many sounds as I'd personally prefer in an audio drama these days), though there are exceptions. One story is told almost completely in letters between a boy and his uncle (Beethoven Lives Upstairs). The music used as a soundtrack for the story is all by the composer it's centred around, and to this day some of the pieces are associated in my brain with scenes from those tapes.

I was enthralled by these story tapes as a child. I listened to them over and over and over. I had a particular love for Mozart's Magic Fantasy, where a young girl falls into the world of the Magic Flute (softened a bit for children), which enchanted me utterly. All the featured songs from the opera got English lyrics to befit the story the tape was telling and it can be a little strange to one who is familiar with the original (I was not. I still loved the Queen of the Night's solo even though she was the villain).

But one story I dearly loved was that of an orphan named Katarina who is sent to Vivaldi's orphanage/school, firstly because Vivaldi was portrayed as such a warm, kind man who loved his music and his girls, and because I got very attached to Katarina. Spoilers for a twenty-something-year-old story tape, a magic violin reveals that she's the missing granddaughter of a duke. The whole story was lovely and even listening back to it a few weeks ago, I was brought nearly to tears by it.

I thought that was the last I'd hear of her, so I was deeply delighted when I found out she got a sequel in the form of the Hallelujah Handel story. My stars, I fucking loved Handel. Not just because he was blind, but his whole vibe. He was a grumpy old man but he loved his music.

Also there was a boy who was selectively mute via trauma and didn't speak, but did sing beautifully. I love Thomas with my whole entire soul (this sequel is set in England, Katarina's grandfather becomes an Italian ambassador to England and of course Katarina goes with).

Anyways I know I had dreams about Katarina, and probably this version of Vivaldi as well because I liked him so much, and there's a small part of me that wants to write a little fic where Katarina returns to Venice after Handel dies at the end of his story (most of which is told in a flashback, like the Vivaldi one). But I don't know how historically accurate these stories are, just that they're not quite accurate, and I gotta google when Vivaldi died and probably blow any plans I may have had out of the water...

(Also if these people did or were associated with anyone who did bad things I don't wanna know. Lemme keep this part of my childhood.)

#Trix Rambles #Classical Kids #I don't know if there's even a fandom for stuff like this on AO3 #There probably isn't...

[stemghost]

Ruben fucking Victoriano.

How the fuck, are you gonna say you love a character, and not use their name, but rather an anagram that is correlated to what was probably an extremely traumatic experience.

Also, Ruben... Victoriano??? Do you not hear how sexy that is??? You choose to refer to him as Ruvik after hearing that?

FUCKING— I will yeet a bitch.

#I am a tiny bit more lenient with those who don’t know the DLC’s #but only a tiny bit #it still says his name in the flashbacks and audio tapes #I mean come on #not that hard to listen and or read #everything is subtitled guys #fucking hell #mini rant tbh #tired of this shit #I may be too passionate but I don’t give a shit #ruben victoriano #ruvik #tew ruvik #tew #the evil within #my post

[moviemunchies]

Disney made a movie about the making of Mary Poppins.

The story goes like this: P.L. Travers, the author of the Mary Poppins books, is broke. She needs money. And for the past twenty years Walt Disney has been desperately trying to buy the rights to adapt one of the books into a movie. Travers, however, being a stuffy English woman who doesn’t want her works adapted into a “silly cartoon” and thinks that Disney will butcher the material, doesn’t want to. But as her attorney points out, she needs the money, so she agrees to go to Los Angeles for a couple of weeks and negotiate. There the scriptwriter and lyricists attempt to work with her on how the movie will go, but Travers proves difficult to work with, and refuses to budge on what seem to be very minor points.

All the while, the audience (and P.L. Travers, it’s implied) are receiving flashbacks to her childhood in Australia, which seems to start as a somewhat idyllic life in the Australian countryside, but quickly shifts as her father’s alcoholism becomes more and more obvious to the audience.

It is a bit of a difficult movie to really wrap my head around. It’s not a complicated Plot or anything, but it’s a movie that’s essentially about trying to convince an author to sell out to Disney. And in a world in which Disney owns an absurd amount of the entertainment industry, trying to frame a story about Disney being a nice company just trying to share good stories with the world… well, it’s a bit of a hard sell. And this movie did come out in 2013, when it wasn’t quite as obvious to all of us that Disney was taking over EVERYTHING yet--although it should have been, considering they bought Lucasfilm and Marvel at that point, but we all just kind of joked about it--so it’s a bit lighter of a blow, but it still hits very weirdly. I like this movie, but I don’t know if I should feel bad about it because it’s so obviously Disney making a movie about how it’s okay that absorbing all these properties and twisting them into something with their brand stomped on it.

...I did also rewatch Lindsay Ellis’s video on this, yes, if you were wondering. And to be clear, her video is probably better than anything I’m about to say.

It is a fascinating movie about the process of adaptation though. Because I feel as if people of my generation were very much of the opinion, back when our favorite books like Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings were being adapted, that a good adaptation was one that was an exact translation from the book onto screen, all with the smiling approval of the book’s author. And even in very good adaptations or I don’t think that’s how it works at all. I think most people think that Mary Poppins is a good movie, but that doesn’t change that it’s not a very accurate representation of the book it’s adapted from. 

In a way, we have that on full display here. P.L. Travers never really loved the movie of her book; but at the end of her life she’d made peace with it as a well-made film, although she didn’t consider it related to her own work. In the film we watch her desperately try to exert more control over the movie 

Travers demanding that the entire process be recorded on tape was a real thing, BTW. You might have figured that out from the bits of audio played during the credits.

It’s also all tied up in her memories of her father--hence the title. Because (in-film) Travers identified the fictional Mr. Banks she created with her own father, and her acceptance of Disney’s adaptation is tied up with that--making sure that they understand that even if he wasn’t perfect, Mr. Banks wasn’t a monster, and he needs saving more so than his children. Hence the resolution of _Mary Poppins_ is about the redemption of Mr. Banks, rather than just about his children (hence the movie’s title).

I have no idea if this is remotely true or not; after all, while P.L. Travers is a pen name that she took from her father (his first name was Travers), the first Mary Poppins book was dedicated to her mother. But it’s an interesting conjecture and I, who knows next to nothing about the subject matter, think it works.

Emma Thompson manages to make Travers both kind of terrible but also very likable in her performance. No, her being rude to everyone doesn’t endear her, but the frustrations she’s being rude over are relatable, if just expressed in a way that would make you very exhausted with her in real life. Which is why her more emotional moments in the film stand out and make them that much more heartbreaking.

Tom Hanks as Walt Disney is pretty much… well, it’s what you expect. It’s good casting. The movie paints Disney a lot lighter than he probably was in real life, but it doesn’t lose the fact that he’s very much out to make money--the film just also balances that with him trying to make people happy with it.

Apparently Tom Hanks campaigned to show Disney smoking on screen, but this was overruled, so you just hear him coughing and he mentions it at one point, and that he doesn’t like to smoke in public for fear of being a bad influence (which was true).

Paul Giamatti plays Ralph, Travers’s driver while she’s in Los Angeles. And he’s cool. Basically he’s there to show Travers becoming less harsh.

Bradley Whitford plays Don Dagradi, the scriptwriter of Mary Poppins, and B.J. Novak and Jason Schwartzman play the Sherman Brothers, the lyricists for the movie. They're kind of just there to have Walt be nice to and Travers be mean to. They don’t get that much to do other than shuffle about and awkwardly try to do their jobs. Novak, as Robert Sherman, gets a little more to do, in that he actually snarks back a few times, but overall these actors are underused. And I get that it’s hard to use them more and give them more material, because this isn’t their story, but they basically do one thing the entire movie and that’s it.

In the backstory, we have a very good performance from Colin Farrell as Travers Goff, Travers’s father, who is able to portray a man who is both a charming father but also kind of a massive jerk as his alcoholism and illness takes over his life.

Annie Rose Buckley plays young P.L. Travers, Ginty Goff, and she does a great job? I’m not usually critical of child actors, I suppose, but I think she did a phenomenal job of a girl who just has no idea what’s going on with her dad until it’s far too late.

It’s a good movie. I enjoy watching it. Yes, it’s whitewashing the history of the company, and presenting the ending to be a lot happier than it probably was in real life. And that’s not bad! A lot of good movies are like that! But I have really mixed feelings about it nowadays with Disney’s business practices and the way it dominates the entertainment industry. A movie that tells it’s perfectly fine for Disney to eat up and profit off of all fiction is a harder sell for me nowadays. Maybe that’s a ‘me’ thing though.

#Saving Mr. Banks #Marry Poppins #Emma Thompson #Tom Hanks #P.L. Travers #Walt Disney #Movie Munchies

[staliaqueen]

Riverdale 4x17 - First thoughts

Pre-thoughts/expectations: Im very exicted for once. At first I was dreading this epiosde, because, you know, it’s a musical one, and you know how the last one went... (first thoughts on that here). But then they dropped all the Barchie stuff so now I’m PUMPED!

Warnings: Swearing and caps lock, also I didn’t edit any of this. 

First thoughts: 

Jughead: “It was over.” Me: Bughead?

I’m glad to see Jughead back writing in Pop’s tho

God another tape? I honestly completetly forgot about those

Oh no Jughead is singing again

It was god awful last time

I’ve only heard three words and it sounds like ha has inproved but I don’t wanna get my hopes up

Okay Cole’s singing is better (maybe that’s because he’s singing a low tone now though?) but I still think it’s a weird creative decision to have Jughead sing tbh. It just feels really weird and out of character. I know he’s not actually singing but still. I think the musical episodes would work better (or less bad) if he was the only one that didn’t sing. 

Oh now Archie is singing that is so much better

And Veronica too

I don’t know which musical this is from but I promise I won’t judge it based in Riverdale’s interpertation 

The people singing at Pop’s are really funny to me but I don’t know why

But also SWEET PEA YAY

I love Veronica’s outfit can I have that?

I hope Hiram dies

God Archie and his big mouth

He and Hagrid should be friends

I would honestly pay to see that spinoff 

GOD ARCHIE IS SO PRCIOUS AND JUST WANTS TO HELP I LOVE YOU

“The salem witch trails, definitly.” You fucking took the words right out of my mouth Jughead

Knowing that Brachie is coming is giving me the streangth to get through Bughead scenes without wanting to puke wow that hasn’t happened in a while

How do you know it’s a he, Charles? Do you know him? Is it you and your boyfriend in prison? 

Really Mr. Honey? Let Kevin sing! He’s the best of the cast!!!

“We’re generation Z” God that fucking cracked me up. No you’re not you’re all 30! I know they’re probably trying to give us a voice but I feel worse about being gen Z now that Kevin said it like that

Kevin sings tho so that’s good

Doing something like this, giving teenagers today a voice and trying to express how they feel is something I really wanna see more but it doesn’t work in Riverdale. Riverdale is so far removed from reality that doing these kind of realistic and relevant things and topics can’t work. If you’re gonna give generation Z a voice then you need to do it with people who behave like real gen Z teenagers, and the characters in Riverdale don’t. I don’t mean that all media have to be realistic, but if you’re gonna do something like this it kinda does. 

The musical numbers aren’t as awkward as in Heathers. That just hurt to watch, but this is totally fine. 

If no one had number 69 I’m sueing 

The Archies? Does Archie have a secret twin too?? With the same name???

THE CAR BETTY HELPED HIM FIX UP YEAH

yes bring back the Fred Heads

I can’t concentrate on the Fnags/Kevin scene cause I’m just thinking about that tickling thing and how fucking weird that was

I like Fangs being a supportive boyfriend tho

Yeah Betty’s about to roast Jughead this is great

Jughead’s lying to Betty again what a surprise

I’m fine with Jughead being in the band as long as he doesn’t sing

He can play drums like his dad

OH FUCK YEAH KEVIN IN DRAG LET’S DO THIS

The receptionist looking at Kevin OMG 😂😂😂

Shout out to Miss Bell

OMG SWEET PEA IS HELPING AND HE’S PLAYING THE GUTIAR???? TIGER PRINT HAS NEVER LOOKED SO GOOD

OMG YESSSS KEVIN KISSED ARCHIE THAT WAS AMAZING DIDN’T KNOW I NEEDED THAT

At least Honey let him finish the song before he pulled the plug

This scene would’ve been so much cuter if it felt like Betty, Veronica, Toni, Cheryl and Kevin were all actually friends

Hate to break it to you Betty but that’s not a wig it’s a tiara

Wow they’re really making up for 3 seasons without drag

God Toni’s wig and Cheryl’s hair

OMG IT FEELS SO GOOD SEEING BETTY IN A WIG THAT ISN’T THAT SHITTY D*ARK B*ETTY WIG

Sugar Daddy is the best one yet but I don’t think it’s the right one to convince Mr. Honey

aaand I was right

Can all of them be barred from Prom? Cause I really don’t wanna see that unless Barchie goes together

Honestly I don’t think Veronica has the right to be that mad at Archie. Hiram isn’t his dad he can’t just make him go to the hospital. He tried to talk to him but he refused to listen there was litteraly nothing more he could do. Maybe he should’ve told Veronica earlier but th episode doesn’t tell us how long it took him to do it but it looked like it was the next day

Betty has more of a reason to be mad 

Also Jug don’t be so dramatic you didn’t actually die you idiot

OH NO DON’T SING

FUCK I CAN’T WITH THIS ANGSTY SCREAM SINGING BULLSHIT STOP

When Betty said “How do you think I feel” it sounded completely diffrent from the rest of the audio. Seriously, that shitty amature dubbing is kinda inexcusible from a big show like this

They look kinda funny screaming at each other

sSsSsSsSsSsSsSsSsSsSsSsown up 😂😂😂

FUCK YEAH EVERYONE’S IN DRAG NOW

Wait so are the fights happening during school time? Wtf? They’re editing the events like they take place during the same time so why aren’t they at school??

NEVERMIND REGGIE IN DRAG SKJKFLHJSHF

FUCK YOU HONEY YOU CAN’T CANCEL THE SHOW BECAUSE OF A PEACEFUL PROTEST WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU

fUCK YEAH THE BARCHIE SCENE IS COMING NOW BE PREPARED FOR MORE CAPSLOCK

You didn’t screw up shit she shouldn’t have gotten as mad as she did because of that

“We peaked in the 1st grade” God they’re so adorable 

OMG THEY’RE GONNA DO A CALLBACK TO SEASON 1 WHEN ARCHIE LOOKED AT BETTY LIKE THAT AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHSKJJSH

Ok nevermind it was about Fred sill really cute

God they’re gonna sing a song called Origin of Love.... I don’t think I’m mentally prepared for this

Do I even have to say that this is the best song number in the show?

Veronica what are you doing I want Barchie

No not Jughead ugh

CAN THOR PLEASE KILL THEM ALL WITH HIS HAMMER THAT WOULD BE GREAT

Okay Cole’s singing has improved a lot I’ll give him snaps for that

I take back not wanting Veronica or Jughead right now this is great Jeronica and Barchie parallells

I really hope this cheating plot line will bring Jug and Veronica together that would be so great

OMG THE FLASHBACKS TO BARCHIE SEASON 1 MY HEART

AND FLASHBACK TO THE BARCHIE KISS FUCK YEAH

FUCK YEAH THEY’RE KISSING NOW SJKSLHJSDBVHBRGVHWR WFHBVHVWKJHRVBRHBVHRBH

That was better than all Bughead and Varchie kisses combined don’t @ me 

She looks happier and more in love in the picture with Archie

OMG JUGHEAD IS HERE YES BRING THE ANGST

I can’t wait to see Jughead’s reaction to finding out Betty cheated on him with Archie

LOL Archie has 1 picture with Veronica and 4 with Betty that’s so in character I love it

omg they’re still gonna perform it’s gonna be so awkward I love it

YES THEY’RE LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOWS NOW I LOVE IT

OH MY GOD THIS SONG WTF IT’S GIVING ME SO MANY FEELS

OH MY GOD THEY’RE DANCING IN THE OUTFITS FROM THE DANCE IN 1X1 I CAN’T REMEMBER THE NAME OF THIS IS EVERYTHING THAT I’VE EVER WANTED 

NAME ONE BUGHEAD MOMENT THAT EVEN COMES CLOSE TO THIS YOU CAN’T

THE HANDS AGAINST THE WINDOWS HHHHMHMHNJBNJTNBDNBN

I WISH THERE WAS SOMETHING BIGGER THAN CAPSLOCK TO SHOW HOW I’M FEELING

Yes they’re preforming now this is gonna be so awkward

And they showed Sweet Pea for another second 

Did they forget that he’s a fan favourite??

Jughead’s playing the drums but he still has a mic fuck

He looks so confused when Betty won’t look back at him God that’s hilarious 

Fangs and Sweets singing with to the misfits part yess

WHY ARE THEY STANDING ON THE ROOF THATS SO STUPID THIS WAS AN ACTUAL GOOD EPISODE DONT RUIN IT

How many fucking people are there I thought Riverdale was a small town

...

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.......................................wtf was that?

I don’t know wether to laugh or cry

Final thoughts: BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE BARCHIE with a really wird ending like wtf

#riverdale #rd #4x17 #riverdale 4x17 #rd 4x17 #riverdale season 4 #riverdale season four #barchie #archie andrews #betty cooper #jughead jones #veronica lodge #jeronica #vughead #kevin keller #reggie mantle #fangs fogarty #sweetpea #sweet pea #anti bughead #anti varchie

[bubblytarts]

Bendy and the Inky Musical - Part 1/5

And so it begins! Note that some stuff happens out of order, but that’s just to make the story move smoother, as it’s pretty hard to take a video game and turn it into a musical. Otherwise, here are the first six songs, taking us through all of Chapter One, and most of Chapter Two!

Set Us Free (Prologue) - Joey, Wally, Ensemble

The show begins with a single spotlight on Joey, far off to one side. He opens up with basically a short intro of the studio and Bendy.

However, Joey is quickly interrupted by another spotlight on the other side of the stage. Joey freezes in place. Under the other spotlight is Wally, who tells the audience that Joey talks too much, so he’s going to narrate the story.

The tempo (and creep factor) picks up as Wally (with backup from shadowy figures slowly moving on stage) sings about the studio going under, and how thirty years later, Joey is writing a letter.

Joey in fact writes the letter onstage, and hands it off to a figure just out of the spotlight. The figure seems to be wearing a mask, but the lights on the rest of the stage are dim, so it’s difficult to tell. The ensemble grows in intensity as the masked figure hands the letter off to what seems to be a wolf, who hands it to a woman, who hands it to a man with a boxy head, who hands it to another wolf, who hands it to a woman with a ponytail, who hands it to Wally. The ensemble separates and walk around the stage as Wally takes the letter upstage, handing it to one more figure.

Another spotlight turns on as Wally hands over the letter, revealing Henry.

Joey and Wally join the ensemble in wishing to be “Set Free” as Henry walks forward,  the only one not singing, staring at the letter and not noticing the ensemble’s choreography around him. The song ends as Henry reaches the front of the stage, as everyone reaches out towards him.

The Good Old Days - Henry

(Think a much, MUCH happier Empty Chairs at Empty Tables; Les Mis)

The ensemble quickly leaves the stage, with Joey following after a moment. Wally makes himself comfortable sitting on the edge of the stage, and appears to take a nap.

Henry enters the studio, saying his iconic “Alright Joey, I’m here. Let’s see if we can find what you wanted me to see.” Henry quickly finds his old desk, and his line about his desk is the cue for the music to start.

It’s a short, melancholy song, but it is vital to the show, as it basically serves to fill in a bit of Henry’s personality and backstory with Joey before it all starts to go bad. Most of the song is about Henry not regretting leaving, but wishing that he knew what happened to all his friends at the studio.

Henry actually doesn’t get to finish the song, as he trails off the ending note when he comes across the Ink Machine.

The Ink Machine - Wally, Ensemble

(Think Build Our Machine, but ominous)

At Henry’s line about the Ink Machine, Wally wakes up from his nap and yells, “That there’s the Ink Machine! The cause of all our problems!”

A chorus of Lost Ones back up Wally as he gets Henry’s attention. Henry sees Wally, and to some degree recognizes him, as he does greet Wally by name, but doesn’t seem to quite get the connection that the janitor shouldn’t be here. (The perks of being the narrator, no one questions you!)

With the prompting from the singers, Henry gathers the six items, and activates the Ink Machine.

Once the Machine is activated, the Lost Ones immediately run away in fear, and Wally follows them, looking less fearful. Henry seems pleased with his work, and turns around to ask Wally about it, only to see that Wally and the ensemble have disappeared.

Dreams Come True - Joey

(Think a no-less psychotic, but slightly more encouraging You’ll Be Back; Hamilton)

The next song does not start until after the end of Chapter One. Henry will get scared by the Ink Demon, and then will fall through the floor, where he will quickly grab the axe and step on the pentagram, leading to a blackout on stage.

Joey will then take center stage, and sing an uplifting, happy song about how dreaming can accomplish anything, and he’s willing to do anything to make dreams come true!

It’s meant to be Joey’s public persona, so he’s over the top happy and excited, and the audience should truly feel like this is a person they can trust with their dreams (even though they really can’t, of course).

A Pencil and a Dream - Sammy, Joey, Wally, Norman, Jack, Ensemble

After Henry wakes up, he continues into the Music Department. This song is basically a quick way of introducing some more characters in the past, and how they interact while having Henry complete the game puzzles in the present.

Sammy, Joey, Norman, and Jack all have various small solo speaking parts, where they interrupt the singing of the ensemble to talk about their audio logs. The topics coincide with what Henry is doing in present day, such as Sammy yelling at Wally for losing his keys again, followed by Henry finding them in the garbage.

Wally also keeps trying to warn Henry about something, but keeps being too late on account of the flashbacks interrupting him (example being Wally trying to tell Henry about Jack hanging out in the sewers, only to get interrupted by past Jack, and by the time Wally gets to Henry he already got the valve).

Song of Salvation - Sammy, Henry

After opening up Sammy’s sanctuary, Henry finds an audio log from Sammy. It’s actually Sammy’s “Can I Get An Amen” tape, although it’s been modified to work as a song.

As the song continues to get creepier, Henry starts to sing overtop of him, wondering aloud what happened to make a respectable person like Sammy go crazy. Henry wonders what became of his old friend.

Henry stops singing when he realizes that the tape has stopped playing, but the song is still going. Behind Henry, Sammy is stalking towards him with the dustpan.

Henry begins to back up from the tape in fear, looking around but not seeing Sammy until he is hit over the head and mostly knocked out.

Sammy sings the last line of the song softly, and asks the barely conscious Henry, who is reaching towards him, “Can I Get An Amen?” Before Henry’s arm drops and another blackout on stage.

#I’m having a ton of fun with this #bendy and the inky musical #bendy and the ink machine #batim #joey drew #wally franks #henry stein #sammy lawrence #norman polk #jack fain

[mxliv-oftheendless]

The Shocking Case of O.J. Simpson (Part 2)

And we are back! So in Part 1 we looked at an overview of the case; here in Part 2 we’re gonna look at the suspects! I’m thinking this is how it’ll go for true crime episodes in the future. Speaking of which, if any of you guys have an idea of an episode for me to do next, whether it’s supernatural or true crime, feel free to suggest it! 

Now that we’re getting into suspects, I feel I should reiterate my warning from Part 1: we’re gonna get into some of the... heavier details in this part. If at any point you feel uncomfortable or distressed by what you read, you are totally free to stop reading. I personally had no problem with what is addressed, but I realize not everyone is me. Your feelings are valid, and you are not a lesser person for wanting to stop reading. 

And now, without further ado, enjoy!

Tag list: @cosmicrealmofkissteria​  @ashestoashesvvi​  @kategwidt​

VINNIE [voiceover]: Now that we’ve covered the timeline and important events in the case, let’s get into the suspects. Unlike our other cases, this case has one clear top suspect: O. J. Simpson. So we’re going to break this down into two sections; why O. J. is the killer, and why O. J. is NOT the killer. Let’s start with why he could have done it. First off, let’s start with a possible motive. O. J. and Nicole Simpson had been going through a break, and at the time of the murders were living in separate residences. Also at the time of the murders, Nicole and Ronald Goldman had grown increasingly close, leading some to speculate that they were perhaps more than friends. Though Goldman said this was not the case.

That is obviously a clear motive right there.

Yeah, obviously. Even if Goldman said it wasn’t the case…

O. J. could still think he’s lying and they’re getting romantically involved.

VINNIE [voiceover]: Now, let’s return to the timeline. If the murders did in fact occur around 10:15 PM, the time the dog barking began, that would give O. J. enough time to commit the murders, clean himself up, and be back at his house by 11 PM, in time to greet the limo driver.

[cut to the three driving in the car in Brentwood. It is now night]

VINNIE: Right now, we’re headed to O. J.’s Rockingham Estate, which, not-so-fun fact, was only six minutes away from Nicole’s townhouse.

PAUL: Oh man, really?

GENE: So it’s definitely feasible, especially if he was booking it.

[car stops, and they all look out the window]

PAUL: Is that it?

VINNIE: That is it. [camera pans over a gated entrance as Vinnie speaks] So this the former site of O. J.’s Rockingham Estate. It was demolished in 1998, but… probably very happy to leave.

[screen cuts back to the slideshow]

VINNIE [voiceover]: Going into DNA evidence, O. J.’s blood, as well as Nicole’s and Goldman’s, were found on the glove left at the scene of the crime. Further damning is the fact that this glove matched a glove found at O. J.’s estate behind the guest house, near the area where O. J.’s friend Kato heard loud thumps at 10:40 PM. Both gloves had blood on them that matched Nicole, Goldman, and O. J. O. J. also had a cut on his finger the day after the murders when the police interviewed him. The knitted hat contained hairs that were proven to be O. J.’s by the FBI hair and fiber laboratory. Also found at O. J.’s residence was Nicole’s blood on a sock, and blood was also found in his driveway. The bloody shoeprint found at the crime scene matched O. J.’s size, and the sole pattern matched another pair that O. J. owned at the time. O. J. had also purchased a knife matching the type the coroner predicted had been used. Though, the knife and the shoes were never found.

I’m sorry, how is this an unsolved case again? Because it seems pretty obvious to me that he did it.

Well… *sigh* I don’t know how to answer this question…

I’m pretty sure this is where most people draw the line and say, “Yep. He’s guilty.” I think this is where my grandfather was convinced anyway.

Wasn’t your grandfather kind of a dick, though?

Okay, regardless of whether or not Gene’s grandfather was a dick, I will say that yes, this is where many people draw the line.

VINNIE [voiceover]: Another key detail was the fact that O. J. had been a perpetrator of spousal abuse against Nicole Simpson in the past, reportedly resulting in nine police visits to the Simpson residence responding to domestic disturbance calls. In 1989, O. J. was found guilty for spousal abuse, and plead no contest to the charges. Bizarrely, in 2006, O. J. himself wrote and published a book called “If I Did It”; a hypothetical account of the murder. Though the book was first cancelled due to public outrage, it was still later published, with all profits going to the Goldman family.

Wait wait wait, hang on a sec.

Uh huh?

So O. J., the man everybody thinks did it…

Yes.

…after getting acquitted for these murders…

Yes.

…writes a goddamn book on what could have happened if he did it?

Yes.

…

*wheeze*

*laughter* What the fuck, man?

This guy’s got some balls on him, that’s all I’ll say.

VINNIE [voiceover]: For those that are new to this case, O. J. Simpson was found not guilty. Despite the DNA evidence found at the crime scene, the defense team called to the attention of the jury technical mistakes made by the forensic team, which created some doubt over the evidence. Evidence was not packaged correctly and even left in a van to overheat. This ultimately led them to suggest that the crime scene may have been contaminated.

So, do we have any commentary on this?

*sighs*

Nope.

I got nothin’.

Okay then.

VINNIE [voiceover]: During the trial, the defense team had O. J. try on the glove found at the crime scene, and it was too small, leading to the now famous line by his lawyer, “If it doesn’t fit, you must acquit.” Though, it’s worth mentioning the prosecution team was against having O. J. try on the glove, because it had been frozen and unfrozen multiple times as a preservation method, and it also had been covered in blood.

Oh, THAT’S where that line comes from!

Yep, this is where it’s from.

I was wondering what line they were parodying on that one Rick and Morty episode.

VINNIE [voiceover]: Many also believe that race played a factor in O. J.’s acquittal, due to the events that surrounded the trial. In 1992, race riots occurred due to the LAPD’s senseless and horrific beating of a black man named Rodney King; a beating for which the assaulting officers were acquitted of all charges. The defense strategically used law enforcement racism as a reason for O. J.’s charges; they showed a video of Simpson handcuffed as soon as he returned from Chicago, demonstrating the rush in judgement by the police. Perhaps one of their biggest arguments was centered around Detective Mark Fuhrman. During the trial, the defense played for the jury a tape of audio in which Detective Fuhrman was recorded using racial slurs over FORTY times in one recorded sitting.

What the fuck?!

Jesus…

VINNIE [voiceover]: This is noteworthy, because Detective Fuhrman was also the first person to step inside O. J.’s Brentwood Rockingham Estate after the murders occurred, a feat he accomplished by jumping over the wall of the estate. This is a critical detail, because according to Fuhrman’s own testimony, it was during this time after he jumped the wall that he alone discovered the notorious, matching bloody glove behind O. J.’s guest house. With this information, the defense was able to suggest that Detective Fuhrman planted the glove and perhaps all other evidence found at O. J.’s estate, effectively tainting the evidence regardless of whether or not it was true. Christopher Darden, a deputy district attorney assigned to the O. J. case summarized it in this quote: “It will do one thing. It will upset the black jurors. It will say, whose side are you on, ‘the man’ or ‘the brothers’?” The jury was made up of eight black people, one Hispanic person, one white person, and two people of mixed race. All these things considered, the jury reached the verdict of not guilty, after only four hours of deliberation. However, it’s worth mentioning that O. J. lost the eventual civil case for the wrongful deaths of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman, with the jury awarding their families $33.5 million in punitive damages.

[cuts back to the office]

PAUL: This episode is gettin’ me down, man.

VINNIE: Yeah, I— [starts laughing]

PAUL: This sucks.

GENE: I agree, this is the worst.

VINNIE: Yeah, it is not fun.

PAUL: Jesus, I’m getting JonBenet Ramsey flashbacks. This is the fucking worst.

VINNIE [voiceover]: Though, if O. J. Simpson didn’t kill his ex-wife and Ronald Goldman, then who did? Let’s get into some alternate suspects. The first suspect is convicted serial killer Glen Rogers. In an investigation discovery documentary, Clay Rogers, the brother of Glen Rogers, said that while on death row, his brother Glen confessed to murdering Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman. Though, even if this theory is true, O. J. would still be guilty. Glen Rogers had reportedly been hired by O. J. to steal a pair of earrings from her condo, but was told to kill her if she got in the way. However, it’s possible that Rogers was serving a six week jail sentence at the time of the murders, and therefore lied about his involvement.

So O. J. hired a serial killer to steal a pair of earrings?

Yeah, that… that doesn’t make a lot of sense.

No, it really doesn’t.

Those must’ve been some pretty damn expensive earrings.

VINNIE [voiceover]: The last suspect is Jason Simpson, O. J.’s son, and is the sole theory of famed private investigator Bill Dear, one of the few private investigators to be inducted into the Police Hall of Fame. Though, it’s worth mentioning that people have discredited Dear’s case as entirely circumstantial.

I already am suspicious of this theory.

Oh, just wait.

Is it bad?

Well, I don’t know if I would call it “bad” per se, but it’s… it’s kind of fucked up.

VINNIE [voiceover]: Nonetheless, Dear presents his theory in a book, and the highlights are as follows: At the time of Nicole and Goldman’s murders, Jason was on probation after having attacked his former boss with a knife. According to Dear, Jason had also attacked a former girlfriend named Jennifer Green. Dear also spoke to another former girlfriend of Jason’s named Dee Dee, who claimed Jason almost broke her back after throwing her into a bathtub, and perhaps even more suspiciously, cut off her hair with a knife, giving Jason two reported assaults involving a knife. Dear also reportedly obtained medical records of Jason’s—illegally, some might add—by dressing up and impersonating a doctor at Cedar-Sinai Hospital, where Jason had been a patient, for two weeks.

Okay—wow.

He, *laughing* he impersonated a doctor for two weeks just to get this kid’s medical files?

*wheeze* It does sound ridiculous when you put it like that.

Why didn’t he just ask the hospital for the records?

Well, there were probably a ton of hoops he would’ve had to jump through if he did that. Like, I know there’s a law protecting doctor-patient confidentiality for one thing.

… Okay, that makes sense. But still… weird.

Definitely weird. The Police Hall of Fame didn’t seem to think it was weird, though.

Is that really a thing?

Yes.

Okay... I dunno how to feel about that, but okay.

VINNIE [voiceover]: According to Dear, Jason had been diagnosed with Intermittent Rage Disorder, and around the time of the murders, Jason stopped taking the prescribed antipsychotic drugs. This was also during the time when Jason reportedly told doctors he was “going to rage.” Jason’s alibi was that he was working at a restaurant that night. Dear feels this is a flimsy alibi, due to the fact that his timecard is reportedly handwritten, which could suggest it was written after the murders. This reportedly handwritten timecard is even more suspicious when you consider the fact that the electronic time clock was fully functional that night. Dear also reportedly has pictures of Jason wearing a knitted hat that bears resemblance to the hat found at the scene of the crime, pictures taken before the murders and not after. To cap this off, Dear suggests that O. J. was only present at the scene of the crime to protect his son, and that this would explain his bizarre behavior such as the famous Bronco chase. But as mentioned before, many have discredited Dear’s case as almost entirely circumstantial.

I will say this: he does make a solid case.

Yeah, but… I dunno…

I hesitate to say this theory is good, because unlike with O. J., there’s no definite, hard evidence that he did it.

Yeah, there is that.

There’s no DNA evidence, his theory on the alibi is kinda shaky…

It’s almost as if he’s twisting around facts to support his theory…

It really does.

Which as we all know is intellectually dishonest.

Very intellectually dishonest.

VINNIE [voiceover]: Unrelated to this case, on September 16th, 2007, O. J. was connected to a robbery in Las Vegas, Nevada. In the 2008 trial that followed, O. J. was found guilty for twelve counts, including armed robbery and kidnapping, and was sentenced to 33 years in prison. According to a CNN survey, the overall percentage of Americans who believe O. J. did murder Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman has increased from 66% in 1994 to 83% in 2014. Perhaps one day we will have a definite answer to the question of who murdered Nicole Simpson and Ronald Goldman. But for now, the case officially remains… UNSOLVED.

[as the credits roll, we cut back to the office set. Paul, Gene, and Vinnie all look unsure of what to do next]

PAUL: Jeez… Well, thanks for this, Vinnie. This has been fun.

GENE: Yep. We got into some heavy shit this episode.

VINNIE: Well I’m sorry for heeding the request of the masses. [gestures to the camera] They’re the ones that kept suggesting this case.

PAUL: I will say, this did not bum me out as much as JonBenet Ramsey.

VINNIE: I mean, all of us were bummed out by the JonBenet Ramsey case.

GENE: You guys are givin’ me flashbacks.

[beat of silence]

VINNIE: [sighs] I need a drink. [stands up. Paul and Gene follow]

PAUL: I feel like I need a shower.

GENE: I’m gonna go watch some Looney Tunes. I need some humor after all this heaviness.

PAUL: Good idea. [looks and points at the camera] All you guys, go watch some Looney Tunes. Give yourself a laugh. Self-care is important.

BUZZFEED UNSOLVED TRUE CRIME

What unsolved mystery do you want to see next?

#kiss unsolved #kiss unsolved true crime #lol I really put the boys through the wringer on this one eh? #I promise the next true crime case I write up for them will be a bit lighter #well as light as it can be anyway #I always really enjoy writing for this au #it's really fun and these three work really well together #if only they were like this in real life... #well that's what fanfiction's for #hope you guys had a good time reading this #please feel free to suggest another episode to cover #kiss au writing #my writing #thanks for reading!

[jordanandjay]

Monster next door.

Request: Can I get a one shot where Bryce and the Reader are best friends (like how he was with Justin). She’s on the tapes too after Bryce’s tape but no one could bring themselves to give them to her. So she listens to the tapes when Clay releases them. Then she gets super angry with Bryce. You can do whatever you feel with that. Thank you(:

A/n: I get that most people don’t like when writers write about Bryce/ Monty. So if you feel uncomfortable by this then go a head and either skip this, unfollow me or block me.🤷🏽‍♀️ I’m not at all supporting the character.

“Words like this is what Hannah is saying on the tape.”

Italics stand for flashbacks.

(B/n) stands for brothers name.

Warnings: Mentions of Rape, Suicide, Violence, & Swearing

—————————————————————

“My life was just like a train, the straight path was bullshit, rumors, and failed friendships. The occasional turns were the brief moments of happiness I felt. Until the railings had to go straight again which resulted in the train wreck at the end. With that being said I welcome you to tape 13. Enter (Y/n) (L/n).

—————————————————————

‘To: Justin F.🤞🏽❤️

Hey Justin. It’s (Y/n)...again. Could you just text me or something? Let me know your okay buddy? I really miss you. Your still my best friend so if you ever need me, I’ll be here. No matter what. Love you Foley.❤️’

You sighed lightly to yourself as you sent the text knowing very well you wouldn’t get an answer, again. Justin had completely disappeared with out so much as saying a goodbye which hurt more than you would’ve thought it would. “Hey sis! I’m ready for school!” Your seven year old brother said snapping you back into reality.

“Bryce isn’t taking you guys to school today?” Your mother asked looking just as confused as your little brother. “No. He had to make a baseball meeting early today so I’m just gonna take us. Ready (B/n)?” You said grabbing your backpack slinging it over your shoulder.

—————————————————————

“Every school has their it girl. You were exactly that, but so much more.You were a friend to everyone, nerds, goths, preps, troubled kids, and me. You were kind. You are a literal ray of light here at a prison like Liberty High. A light that gets dimmed out by the shadows she surrounds herself with. When I first got to Liberty High I wanted a friendship like the one you, Bryce and Justin had. You were all ready to take a bullet for eachother something I couldn’t understand. Maybe that’s how friendships work, how would I know. How could someone so evil be friends with someone so pure like you? I gathered what little courage I had walking all the way to your doorsteps that was next to Bryce’s house. I was determined on letting you know that your best friend was a monster. That there was a monster next door.”

—————————————————————

You walked awkwardly in the hallways not sure of how to exactly react to everyone who was staring at you. Not the usual ‘oh hey it’s (y/n)’ type of stares, these were stares of pity. You walked through the dead silent hallways which definitely made you shiver. You quickly walked to your locker which was next to Bryce’s.

“Hey there kiddo’.. What’s wrong?” Monty said bringing you into a side hug which is how you two usually greeted one another. “People are staring more than often are they not?” You murmured under your breath while Monty left his arm around your shoulder.

“They uh. Must’ve heard about Bryce and Chloe. They’re going through a rough patch right now is all. No need to worry.” Monty said ruffling your hair playfully before dragging you both off to class. “H-Hey slow down you brainless jerk!” You shouted as you tried to keep up with his long strides.

Scott sighed to himself seeing you smiling brightly. He knew if he told you the truth that smile would never be the same ever again. Was knowing the truth really going to break you as bad as he thought it would.

—————————————————————

“Funny thing about courage. I didn’t have any of it while I was alive. I had stood at your doorsteps until the sun went down and it began to rain. I had failed. I turned back ready to go home in defeat when you opened the door. I stared at you not sure of what to say if you asked what I was doing at your house. Instead you invited me inside with that welcoming smile of yours. That’s just the type of person you are (Y/n). You were a friend that I so desperately needed.”

—————————————————————

A ten year old girl sat alone reading a comic book of Iron Man in the corner. Her (E/c) eyes were completely fixated on the superhero who was kicking ass. She didn’t even notice the boy who sat next to her and also began reading. “Woah. Tony Stark’s a badass huh?”

The small girl jumped turning to the blonde haired boy who smiled to the girl. “Don’t scare me like that!” She whispered to the boy who giggled slightly. “Sorry about that I just didn’t want to bother you. I’m more of a Captain America guy myself. Your an Iron Man fan?” He said as she nodded her head. “Yup! Iron Man and Spider-Man!” She said. “Captain America and Thor!”

The two of them must’ve talked for what felt like forever. They both had lost track of time before realizing they had to go home. “I live up the street from here.” He said carrying the stack of comics which belonged to Spider-Man. “I do too! Wanna walk together?” She said carrying the stack of comics which were Thor.

The two walked home side by side still raving about their favorite super heroes. That is until they stopped infront of a white luxurious home. “Well! This is me.” The (H/c) girl said while the boy smiled from ear to ear. “What no way! I’m right next door! I never got your name.” He said excitedly now that he had a friend.

“My names (Y/n) (L/n).”

“My names Bryce Walker.”

��————————————————————

“The entire night I spent laughing with your amazing family. Your father was intimidating turns out he’s a complete dork, just like you are. Your mother was literally an angel of every religion combined into one to be this absolute goddess, like you as well. Your little brother was a kind, gentle boy. He looked up to you and Bryce which made me fear what kind of man he’d become in a couple of years. As I walked through your luxurious household I couldn’t help but notice every picture that hung on the walls. Most of them you were in were with Justin and Bryce. One in particular caught my eye. You were on Bryce’s back getting a piggy back ride both of you with the brightest smiles I’d ever seen either of you wear. I then realized. I couldn’t do it. How could I take away something that important like that from you. He was a monster but he made you happy. Ironic right? We’re both thinking of the same person with one feeling hate while the other feeling love.

—————————————————————

You walked into the cafeteria while all eyes seemed to fall on you yet again. You glanced over to the group that was your friends now seeing Bryce there. You’d felt relived to see he seemed to be doing okay. You walked over taking a seat next to Scott who was silent , and infront of Bryce. “Hey there Bryce. (B/n) missed you this morning.”

“Hey there kiddo’! I missed both you guys this morning. Just come over later and we’ll all hang in the pool house.” Bryce said making Monty groan loudly in annoyance. “Aww man now we have to play baby sitter.” Both you and Bryce looked over to Monty both speaking at the same time. “Fuck you Monty!”

“Well I just wanted to check in before I left. I’m gonna be in the library I got to study. So I’ll see you guys later.” You said gathering your belongings taking Bryce’s Gatorade. “What? You just got here I haven’t seen you all day.” Bryce said as you walked over to give him a proper goodbye. “I already said I’d be going over later today.” You said giving Bryce a hug which he gladly returned.

“Aww man. Why does Bryce get a full on hug and I get side hugs? Saving a special kiss for me?” Monty said while you made your way over to him while he puckered his lips. Bryce narrowed his eyes at Monty in either anger or irritation. “Sure Monty when you learn how to spell toothbrush. See you guys later!” You said hugging Monty around his head before walking off to the library.

Scott never spoke to you which really came as a shock to you. He was always going out of his way to just say hello. Yet he couldn’t even look you in the eyes today.

—————————————————————

“You kindly drove me home, even giving me a jacket saying I needed to stay warm. Small acts like that just go to prove what a kind and gentle person you are (Y/n). I didn’t have the courage to tell you what that your best friend did to me. In a hot tub I’m sure you two grew up playing in. A few yards away from a house you and your warm kind family called home. But, like I said before courage is a funny thing.”

—————————————————————

You were on the floor reading a text book you needed for calculus. Until someone came and sat in front of you sounding like they were running. You rose your head to see Scott looking at you apologetically. “H-Hey Scotty you okay?” You said closing your text book while he took out his phone.

“(Y/n). I need to confess something to you and I just want you to sit there and listen okay?” Scott said making you nod your head softly. “Hannah made tapes explaining why she did what she did. They were released last night which is why everyone was staring at you. You need to listen to them please. Go somewhere and listen to them alone.” Scott said watching your expression fall.

“There was no practice this morning. Bryce called us in to warn us not to tell you but I’m tiered of people looking at me like I’m a pig. So could you please just listen.” Scott said before sending you the audio files. He leaned forward hugging you softly which you returned before getting up and walking away leaving you shocked.

“I had no courage when I was alive to really do anything. Yet thinking of death has given me courage I never knew I had. So with this newly found courage. I, Hannah Baker am warning you (Y/n) (L/n). Bryce Walker is responsible for the rape of two girls. One of them is me the other well.. you’ll just have to ask.”

—————————————————————

“My life was just like a train, the straight path was bullshit, rumors, and failed friendships. The occasional turns were the brief moments of happiness I felt. Clay was one of my brief moment of happiness. You (Y/n) (L/n) were my second brief moment of happiness. You (Y/n) do not belong on this list. But if I’m going to tell my story I need to tell it all. (Y/n) you were one of the two reasons I was considering to not to kill myself in the end. I never got the chance to say it properly, but now’s a good of time as any. So thank you (Y/n). For everything.”

—————————————————————

Everyone was staring at you just like they were earlier that day. These weren’t looks of pity, they were looks of shock. Your eyes were as red from the crying you’d done in the library alone. You could’ve saved Hannah. You let Hannah down. You felt disappointed in yourself. If you hadn’t fell asleep in the pool house with Alex and Montgomery maybe you could’ve stopped Bryce.

“Yo! Kidd..(Y/n)? You good?” Bryce said as you marched towards him with hot tears of anger still falling from your (E/c) eyes. You clenched your hand tightly making a small fist. As soon as you were close enough you pulled your hand all the way back slamming it right in between Bryce’s eyebrows and upper nose.

“Woah! (Y/n)!”

“What the fuck!”

“Stop it!”

The group you once considered your friends said pulling you back. “Let me go rapist!!” You shouted loudly as you began punching all of them. They all backed away in shock of not only being called a rapist but at you swinging at them. “What the fuck (Y/n)?!” Bryce said as he clenched onto his disfigured nose.

Monty wrapped his arms around you hugging onto you tightly restricting your arms under his. “Let me go! Let me go now you stupid BITCH!” You shouted while jumping trying to free yourself. “What’s wrong!” Bryce said placing his hands on either side of your shoulders.

“What’s wrong?” A young Bryce asked as you wiped the tears from your (E/c) eyes. “Nothing really Bryce. I just.. I don’t have any friends.” Bryce stared you you while you continued crying like a baby. He got on his knees to sit in front of you wiping away the tears from your face. “Well I’m your friend now right? No need to worry. Well be friends forever. Like Steve and Bucky.” Bryce said offering you a hand up off the ground.

Tears of sadness filled your eyes staring into Bryce’s. You began to question where did that little boy that helped you that day go? Had he died long before Hannah had even gotten to Liberty High. Where did your Bryce Walker go?

You jumped up as high as you could slamming your feet onto Bryce’s face making him shout out in pain. “Fuck you! I want my Bryce! MY BRYCE NOT THIS FUCKING RAPIST!!” You shouted as you continued slamming your feet on his head which was now lowered. Monty turned you towards the lockers which you used as an advantage. You placed your feet on the locker using them to jump, flipping you and Monty over with him landing on the back of his head harshly.

You ran towards Bryce bringing your hands to the back of his head pulling him towards your knee slamming them together repeatedly. “Give me Bryce! My Bryce! My Bryce! My Bryce! My Bryce!” You screamed through a cracked voice as you continued crying.

“Like Steve and Bucky.” Bryce said through a toothy grin still with his hand extended.

People stood back watching your rage take over you. That is until one person came to stop you. The only one other than Bryce who could get you out of this murder like state.

“(Y/n). That’s enough.” You let Bryce drop to the floor when you turned to see your other best friend who disappeared months ago. “Justin?” You asked as you stared at him silently. He offered you a soft smile and open arms. You ran towards him already crying like a child. “I know. Come on (Y/n) were going home.” Justin said as he picked you up off the ground carrying you to your car.

You wrapped your arms around him sobbing loudly while he, Tony and Clay drove to his new home. “Our Bryce is gone.” You whispered before clenching onto Justin tightly. “Yeah. But I’m back and I’m not leaving anytime soon.” Justin said as he stroked the back of your head softly.

Bryce watched painfully with blood falling from his eye, nose, and lip. Your Bryce might’ve been dead but at least you still had your Justin.

#13 reasons why imagine #13 reasons why #13 reasons spoilers #13rw imagine #13rw #bryce walker imagine #bryce walker #hannah baker imagine #scott reed imagine #scott reed #justin foley imagine #justin jensen imagine #justin jensen #justin foley

[witchin-bitchin-twopointoh]

ANALYZING WHO KILLED MARKIPLIER CH. 1: PART TWO

Once again, this will be long. This is every notable piece of dialogue, action, clue, relevant theory, or anything else I see fit to include about the second half of the first video. Hold on to your hats, buckos. I’m a detective.

Part One

Scene 5: The Detective (7:02 - 7:51)

After the Mayor leaves, the Detective gives you the preliminary autopsy. 

After a totally procedural and trustworthy rectal exam, our detective has established that Mark died “around” 1:30 AM. Note the use of around.

Also, our Detective is clearly not a real Detective. Why then, I wonder, does The Mayor not have anything to say about it? Nor The Attorney (you)?

A pattern is beginning to develop; the Detective does not want any sort of authorities involved.

Which is odd, considering you’re an Attorney and the Mayor is involved.

You apparently give him your alibi through flashback. Must be that main character privilege. This is definitely Markiplier Logic, so I’ll let it slide, but you do learn something about yourself: you sleep with your eyes open. Weird.

Also, this drug induced flashback alibi is apparently 100% solid, despite there being no witnesses to confirm you didn’t just get up and murder Mark. Methinks the Detective trusts you a bit too much.

At this stage, the Detective says we need to find out everyone’s alibi (without directly saying “alibi,” a term a Detective would definitely know and use during an investigation).

However, after asking about alibis, he hastily includes that you should find who was with Mark last “at the very least.” This could imply that the Detective may not have an alibi.

You are sent off to try to piece together the events of last night, leading up to, including, and following the murder.

Also, you leave the Detective with the body to do more, er... rectal examinations.

Scene 6: Damien and The Colonel (7:52 - 9:46)

You duck under the crime scene tape and walk up to a room where you can see The Mayor through a door left a bit ajar. He’s talking angrily to someone we cannot see.

He accuses them of being flippant, and the Colonel responds from inside the room, out off view, that he is taking the matter very seriously. He sounds rather insulted.

The Mayor doesn’t believe it, and says that he knows the Colonel “hated” Mark, but that apparently Mark had “reached out” to him. What animosity did they have? This is a clear motive for murder, and just short of an active accusation that he did it.

The Mayor is upset. Clearly the most distraught of anyone.

He tells the Colonel he wants him to care. Others have pointed out that he may be saying this because the Colonel is throwing suspicion on himself by acting too aloof.

Meanwhile, the Colonel insists that he does care.

The Mayor expresses disbelief then leaves in an angry huff. This seems like it would be typical of the Colonel, so why the disbelief?

You enter the room once the Mayor leaves, and you approach the Colonel.

He believes that you are the Mayor, and inadvertently reveals the Mayor’s name is Damien.

The exact quote is “Damien, I don’t-” You don’t what, Colonel?

He is immediately quite interested in you.

Just like Damien, he reminisces about how wild you were the night before, calling you a rapscallion. Considering that multiple punches were thrown, Damien did a keg stand, and the Colonel pointed a loaded gun at people, just what did you do last night?

The Colonel doesn’t believe Mark was murdered.

He then gives us a black and white flashback of his version of what happened, voiceover and all. As of Chapter 2, this is the only explanation of what happened by a suspect.

This is silly, but there is some very important information about the Colonel here.

Whilst mocking Mark, he says “My name is Markiplier now.” Then follows that up with “forget all the friends who helped me along the way, just look at my money!” What happened between Mark and The Colonel?

Despite the Colonel insisting that Mark couldn’t hold his booze, Mark never actually drank.

The Butler and The Detective are next to Mark when he says “I need to pay people to be my friends.” Why them, specifically? If he was going for hired help, why not the Chef instead of the Detective? Is Mark indeed paying people to be his friends? If not, why would the Colonel seem to think so?

“You like me? Too bad!” What?

“Gotta go off to the little boy’s room, who wants to join me?” Is this a Detective-like innuendo or a clue?

“My house has more than one staircase!” Indeed it does. Why do you know that, specifically, Colonel? And why is it important?

Mark definitely didn’t die by falling off the stairs. But we have no real reason to believe the Colonel doesn’t believe this, so off you go to investigate the entire house. 

Interestingly, this also means you’ve stopped looking for alibis.

Scene 7: A Domain of Evil (9:47 - 11:02)

The Butler approaches you as you are leaving the home theatre you spoke to the Colonel in. Was he listening?

He has something to show you. Vague and ominous, but okay.

“Now if you’re looking for answers, there’s really no mystery at all.” Is the Butler hinting that he knows what happened?

The Butler knows every detail of the house, and claims he has vetted every guest. Is this a trustworthy claim?

This also makes everything the Butler says and does extremely important.

“A domain of evil this is.” Was this where the murder took place?

Some have claimed to hear an additional voice in the background here, but I simply can’t hear it. 

“You first.” He appears scared. What is he expecting to find?

This is a wine cellar, and the first obvious clue.

A bottle with a red top is smashed on the floor, though there is no liquid anywhere to be seen.

On the racks, there is one row of seven larger gold-topped bottles. Directly next to that is what should be exactly the same except in red, except there’s a gold bottle in the midst where the now broken bottle used to lie.

This means whoever smashed the bottle had to leave and come back to get the 8th gold bottle.

They also had to know and have access to where the wine bottles are kept, or even leave the Manor to get more.

Also, the Colonel’s flask is here. Hm.

The wine bottle appears split in two. That’s not how it’s supposed to look if it was smashed over something... say, a head. It’s safe to assume, due to how intact the bottle is, that something fishy is going on with that.

(...Or teamiplier didn’t want to clean up a bunch of broken glass.)

The Butler is extremely upset. Hysterical even. This is his first display of grief.

He asks you to avert your eyes. Is it because of the mess, or the clues?

He sobs loudly as you exit the cellar.

Scene 8: The Chef and His Little Buddy (11:03 - 13:01)

The Chef is in his kitchen as you approach, angrily chopping... something.

He threatens you in much the same way as at the beginning, brandishing a knife. This is a rather common murder weapon.

Once he recognizes that you’re investigating, he outright threatens you if you were to suspect he’s the killer, and he then launches into his alibi.

He was cleaning up after the food he prepared leading up to the time of the murder.

Obviously this line is funny, but what blood was he "sopping” up?

He retired to his room at 1 AM. 

His chef statue is a security camera.

The FNAF-style security footage has already been analyzed, far before the videos themselves came out...

However, we now have video and audio of the 1:17 AM meeting between Mark and the Detective.

Mark reveals that the Detective’s name is Abe.

Also, according to Abe, both the Chef and the Butler are “clean.”

Where did this occur? There are odd bars in view.

When you finish viewing the security footage, the Chef is gone.

Also, there’s a bottle of red wine on the counter with an empty glass.

Deciding there’s nothing left to do here, you move on to the courtyard.

Scene 9: Damien (13:02 - 14:12)

When you walk up to him, Damien is agitated, fidgeting with his walking stick.

Upon seeing you, he sighs. He then begins to explain himself from earlier.

He apologizes that you had to see him lose his temper. 

He also still seems to believe that the Colonel is acting uncharacteristically, even for him. He thinks that he is in shock.

Apparently, the Colonel is an eccentric. Shocker.

Damien is/was, apparently, friends with both Mark and the Colonel. 

Curiously, this seems to imply that Damien knew everyone at this party, if the familiarity with which he spoke to the Detective in Scene 2 is any indication of prior acquaintanceship. He and Mark are the only characters with this trait.

“I know I’m supposed to be a leader in this scenario...” Because you’re the Mayor? Because you were Mark’s best friend? Why, exactly?

Damien has known Mark since they were kids.

Also, Damien seems to be in denial.

“I don’t have any answers right now.” Damien assumes that his grief exempts him from possible guilt, and he doesn’t provide any sort of alibi.

He leaves to think.

Scene 10: The Body is Gone (14:13 - 14:40)

Abe calls to you from behind, clearly agitated. 

Apparently, the body has vanished.

There is crime tape to mark where the body was found. 

Also there’s a dick. Ha-ha, but Mark may literally have been naked when he vanished.

Also, what’s with the strange head shape?

The scene fades out, and the audience is called to join the hunt.

This took far less time than part one, but it’s also less detailed. I’m running out of steam, lol. This is abt two hours of work so reblogs would be super appreciated, and comments even MORE so!

#markiplier #who killed markiplier

[weneverlearn]

GARAGE PUNK DOC IN THE WORKS! 

Wherein Italian trash rock lifers dust off their old VHS concert tapes and pick up a new camera to document the 1990s garage rock scene.

About the last week of November, a trailer of sorts (above) was making the trash rock rounds. It’s cool clips and odd editing of some of the best garage bands of the 1990s piqued lots of interest and fevered sharings, garnering excited queries of “What?” “When?” “Who?” Gaaaaaggghh!!”

Well it turns out I had a clue, as this in-the-works documentary of the end-of-the-century garage rock scene (ala the one covered in my book) is being scrummed up by Italian uber-fans, Massimo Scocca and Gisella Albertini. They not only started booking great bands from all over the wold in their town of Torino and beyond northern Italy back in the early ‘90s, but they had their own great trash trio, Two Bo’s Maniacs. And yes, @newbombturks have been pals with them since they first booked us in 1993, and are one of many interview subjects planned for the film.

Since the chances of 20th Century Fox coming along to bankroll a doc on the 1990s garage punk scene is probably out of the realm of possibility, here’s hoping Massimo and Gisella get all the help and funding they need to finish the project.

We Never Learn checked in with Gisella for some more details on the project.

So, what is the name of the documentary, and why is it named that?

We needed a working title that could pretty much summarize what it is about, and not just cool sounding: Live The Life You Sing About - Tales of Low Budget and Desperate Rock’n’Roll.  

We started wondering how bands that sound so different from one another are often perceived as part of the same category or “genre.” When someone asks us to define it, we end up with a long series of terms: garage, punk, rock’n’roll; sometimes with an extra “sixties” or “lo-fi” or “low-budget” in all possible combinations because they’re not not necessarily all true at the same time. Maybe the one thing they have in common is attitude. Something like: play, sing, do what you think is right, no matter what other people think or say. This often comes along with struggle, frustration, and the feeling of being on a different planet, so we threw in an extra “desperate.” It also happens to be the title of an old song that a band brought back to the present, which is another common theme here. However, it might still change, if we come up with a better idea.

Who started the idea to do the documentary, and why?

We came across a box of Video 8 and cassette tapes, forgotten in a closet for years, and something clicked: “We should do something with this!”

From time to time we happen to meet kids who were just babies or very young children in the 90’s, but are very much into this kind of music. Usually when they hear the names of the bands we saw play live, they look at us with amazement and envy. That reminds us of when we talked to people who had seen maybe like Bo Diddley and the Rolling Stones in the ‘60s in just one night. Ok, it means that we’re getting older, but at the same time, we feel lucky and grateful that someone worked hard to allow all that to happen. Now, it’s our chance to save someone “from the misery of being a Taylor Swift fan and do something good for the world” ( - Tim Warren). Ha ha ha!!!

Gisella (far right); Massimo (middle) - Photographer unknown

Is there a kind of timeframe to the bands in the movie?

I guess you know exactly what it means having to choose what to include and what to cut. So many stories that should be told, so little pages...or minutes. It’s just an impossible task. So, we somehow arbitrarily put some boundaries. We decided to focus on whatever happened between 1990 and 1999. Last decade of the millennium. Pretty epic, you know. The era of transition towards new technologies that deeply changed the way of doing many things, but at the same time, at least in this kind of music, strongly rooted in the previous decades of the century.

Oh sure, it’s not that a flying saucer with all these bands landed on Earth on January 1, 1990 and left on December, 1999. We will have flashbacks and references to the present as well. But since the documentary is mostly based on our own archive, it’s also necessarily influenced by the fact that we met some people and not others, and we saw, filmed, and photographed some bands more than others.

Tell me about what your backgrounds are -- in music or life in general.

Oh well, the main people [working on the doc] currently is the two of us -- with the precious help of a few people who could not devote themselves to the project until it’s completed, but worked with us and supported us in many ways.

When we came up with the idea, we had two main options: putting together a professional-looking proposal, sending it around and just wait, hoping some producer would notice its great potential and decide to invest thousands of dollars on it. Or, just jump in and start somehow and figure everything else out in the process. We chose the latter -- it’s more punk! There’s no fame and fortune guaranteed with this project. You do it just because you want to and no matter what.

I mean, we expected a bunch of dedicated fans and collectors would love to see a documentary like this. But being realistic, that’s a relatively small niche. We tried to figure what people know about this. in Italy, the closest they can usually get to this kind of music is what here is called the  “Po-po-po-po-po-po-poo World Cup chant.” Real title: “Seven Nation Army” by the White Stripes. Not even something we plan to mention. 

Next, a bunch of bands of the late 90’s-early 2000s, still quite a bit out of our range. Then numbers get lower and lower, down to the most obscure ones that only few geeks have ever heard of.

Anyway, if all goes well, we’ve finally found a stable technical crew. Also, we’re working on a few ways of funding the project, besides our own bank account, and including crowdfunding later. Plus a few other ideas, but nothing defined yet so I prefer not to say more, until we’re settled.

1995 7″

Torino newspaper clipping, 10/93. - “Shitty local bands get the main title, while they (A-Bones) only appear to deserve a "tough (?) garage rockers from NY.” - Gisella

How far along are you in finishing it, and when do you think it will be done?

We already did a lot of work on the archive and the structure that will help speed up the editing process. However, we still have quite a few interviews to make, presumably in the summer, and post-production that will involve quite a lot of work on sound especially. Sorry guys, sit down and relax, at least until late 2018. But we’ll keep everybody updated on our page.

Who have you talked to so far, and who do you hope to talk to when you come to the States?

We did long interviews with Tim Warren and Ben Wallers at their homes. Then we have eleven more, collected at gigs of the bands that happened to be touring Europe: opportunities that we couldn’t waste. Many interviews were between sound check and dinner, or even after the gig, and we might decide -- with the interviewees -- to use only part of them, or not at all, then do more while we’re in the U.S.A. Oh, I almost forgot to mention 30 audio-only interviews we had made for our zine in the ‘90’s that will be partially edited in as well. Who do we hope to talk to in the States? Hey, we’re Italian and superstitious, we don’t reveal names in advance!

Torino newspaper clipping, 1994.

Tell us about when you first started seeing these kind of garage punk bands. And what was an early show you saw that really made you get into this music?

Gisella: Sixties music has been my favorite since I was 4 or 5, when I found my mom’s Beatles records -- two 45’s -- in a cupboard. From there, you know, Kinks, Them, Animals, Pretty Things, and then Pebbles, Back From the Grave, and the bands more or less inspired by that. So when my friends and I heard that the guy from the Prisoners would play in town with his new band the Prime Movers, we all went, of course. There, we discovered the opening band would be the Wylde Mammoths. Great night, and a first glimpse of things to come. But it was really the Gories and Thee Headcoats records I came across at a local record store that blew my mind and had me say “Oh THIS is what I really want to hear!.” Everything else followed.

Massimo: Well I’m older than Gisella you know, and I saw some awesome bands during the ‘80s like Suicide, Gun Club, etc. I used to collect a lot of garage compilations, early blues records, r&b, soul, and all the good stuff. But the event that attracted me strongly into this music happened in 1990. I was in NYC, checking the Village Voice and saw that the Gories and the Raunch Hands would play that night. So I went there, and man, that gig was unbelievable! Totally different from anything you could hear at that time, and so shocking that it definitely changed my life forever.

I guess there will be a lot of old film footage in the movie. Can you tell us about one or two old videos you have that you are particularly excited about putting in the movie?

The first one we ever shot. it’s 1995, Micha [Warren, Crypt Records] tells us the Oblivians will be touring Europe. The 10” on Sympathy was awesome and the Country Teasers will be playing too, so we decide to follow them around for a week. Right before leaving, I remember a friend of mine had a Video 8 camera from the late 80s, ask him if we can borrow it, and he says yes. Great, off we go in our ‘70s orange, rusty Ford Transit that we can also sleep in. We get to Stuttgart, Germany. The venue is a sort of long narrow basement, really packed, hot wild atmosphere. Camera battery is fully charged, everything ready, we’re thrilled at the idea of filming such an event. Except... five minutes later, the camera’s dead! The battery was fucked up. What do we do? We can’t miss something like this. Between the sets, we ask if I can keep the camera plugged to the only socket around, at the back of the stage, and they say ok. So for the whole gig I’m there in a corner, trying not to pull my 3′ cord too much, horrified at the thought of blacking out amps and P.A., making the band and the crowd mad at me forever. Luckily, I didn’t. And we came home with some real crazy footage!

Was there any band so far that said NO to an interview for the film?

Considering that in most cases we basically popped up at sound-check asking for an interview for a basically nonexistent documentary, we’re really grateful that they all said yes in that moment, despite the often dire circumstances. It gave us the confidence to persist.

As for the future, we haven’t contacted 100% of those we’d like to interview yet. Until now there was only one who said, “Maybe, it depends.” But I already sort of expected this could happen, and in fact I contacted him way before all the others, in order to have time to figure out my countermoves. Not all hope is lost, ha!

Tell us anything else you want about the movie.

We want our documentary to reflect what we think was the feel of that era -- no bullshit, fun, crazy, and not too high tech!

Follow the film’s progress here!!

#livethelifedocumentary #cryptrecords #gories #theeheadcoats #twobosmaniacs #backfromthegrave #garagepunk #trashrock #garagerock #weneverlearn #we never learn

[petite-ursus]

So, a few weeks back I got to see Tamora Pierce and that is probably going to go down as one of the most exciting moments of my life.

However...

In order to listen to her, my best friend Cass and I had to sit through a different author, reading one of his upcoming works. @bummblecatpuppyfly can attest to how horribly awful this was, and I still can’t believe that I was forced to listen to it with my own two ears.

Basically, the excerpt we were read informed us that there’s this tape, and it’s of this girl moaning and writhing in a way which you definitely wish you were a part of. We are introduced to this kid, and the knowledge that the story is told through his eyes.  Oh, and the girl? It’s his younger sister (who is 13.) Turns out he has accidentally released a sex tape of her to the entire world, and he feels super bad about it-- but you really ought to know the whole story. See, the truth is... she was possessed.

The narrative then dives into a flashback, wherein this kid is getting off in his bedroom, hears his sister doing similar in the next, and stops what he is doing. He is shocked. His sister is A Good Girl. She has never even had a boyfriend, and she certainly has never done anything Naughty! So, naturally, he records the audio of his sister apparently getting off.

He then shows it to two of his friends the next day. (The author is sure to mention he has fucked both of them, though with the stuff with the guy was super casual.) They congratulate him. They say his sister is hot, and that they’ve seen him looking at her and hell they don’t blame him. He denies this, with boyish charm. “She’s my sister.”

(At this point I’m pretty sure I’ve gone slack-jawed in disbelief that someone has had the balls not just to write this, but to read it in front of a bunch of young teens, which is the audience around me.) 

But the story goes on. He takes the audio to his sister next, and tells her that he only recorded it for her own good-- to show her how loud it was. She wouldn’t want their parents to find out, would she? She denies having any memory of it happening, demands he erase the audio, then she tells him that if he hears anything like that again he should come into her room.

And that was the end of that slice.

Anyway, I’m not going to name the guy, because I honestly don’t want to risk trafficking any business his way, but it was incredibly gross and I can’t even do any justice to how uncomfortable it made me feel.

And in conclusion... I guess... Men are terrible.

#personal

[hoopyhitchhiker]

Okay, after a day of processing, I’m ready to talk about my thoughts on The Final Problem. It’s pretty long so I’m putting a cut here.

I definitely agree with those who were convinced that the leak looked weird - some parts of the episode were edited in a bizarre way. Plus, there were almost no visual effects that we usually have (text showing up to show deductions, text messages, etc). Parts did look weird. But a lot of it looked just as stunning as ever.

The beginning was super weird and un-Sherlock-y. They didn’t explain what happened between the end of TLD and the beginning of TFP except for John mentioning offhandedly that Eurus shot him with a tranquilizer dart. So... what happened after that, John? How much time did they spend on constructing that prank, seriously. Because it was super weird and unnecessary. TBH it seemed to me that the only reason for it was to show that Mycroft has that weapon - and don’t get me wrong, I’m glad they showed it because it was fucking kickass.

Sherlock referring to John as family gave me so much life - I screamed and gave the TV two thumbs up at that lol

I was sad to have been wrong about Sherlock and Eurus being twins :( I’m a fraternal twin (plus my twin is the opposite sex) and it would’ve been exciting to find out that I had that in common with one of my favorite characters ever. But seeing them as kids was amazing so I can live with it.

I don’t know how much time passed between the explosion and the boat, so this may be nothing, but it seems like all three of them weren’t injured at all. Definitely weird considering John & Sherlock jumped out the second floor windows (or first floor, depending on where you’re from), which would lead to a broken leg at the least, not to mention burns on their backs.

MORIARTY’S. FUCKING. ENTRANCE. This was a mini-masterpiece within the episode. As soon as Queen - aka one of the most iconic and talented rock bands of all time (plus the band I believe to be the best band EVER) - started playing, and I saw Moriarty get off that ‘copter, I was totally on board. I’ve been convinced since TRF that he was really dead, so it was definitely confusing to see him 2 seasons later, but in that moment I was there for it. I could buy that he was alive, because his entrance was that fucking epic. Of course, it was just a flashback, which I had predicted when I saw the setlock images of him.

They did a good job of making me - the viewer - scared of Eurus pretty quickly. When they were at Sherrinford showing interview tapes and talking about how she manipulates people, I was legit scared.

Eurus’s question “Oh my God, have you had sex?!” when Sherlock started playing The Woman’s theme was unsettling. I have nothing against Irene, but hinting that he had sex with her didn’t make any sense. There is a mountain of evidence that Sherlock is not straight. It seemed like a jab at Johnlockers to me.

I liked the setup and execution of the ‘game’ she makes them play; it reminded me both of the movie Saw and also video games like Portal (and Portal 2 is my favorite video game ever), where you have to solve the puzzle before you can progress to the next one. It was grisly and heart-wrenching. Also, all three characters (Sherlock, John, Mycroft) reacted exactly as I would have expected to watching a man kill himself. Well done all around.

The scene with Molly hurt a lot. I’ve always loved her and wanted good things for her. I hated watching her go through that, and the worst part was that when Sherlock told her what to say, she thought it was a prank. It makes you wonder just how frequently Sherlock took advantage of her love for his own purposes. Luckily, we know he wouldn’t do that anymore. I just hope she knows that.

I legit thought Mycroft was going to die in the choose-one-to-kill scene. As soon as it was made clear a few rooms before that he’d have to make this decision, I knew he’d pick John to live - of course he would! I was literally on the edge of my seat as this scene crescendoed, my heart beating in my throat while I watched it unfold. The thing that was weird about it, though, was that Sherlock would choose to shoot himself instead of them. He literally just watched someone make the same choice, and he saw that Eurus simply killed his wife after the fact since they didn’t follow the rules. Wouldn’t he assume Eurus would do the same if Sherlock shot himself? He could have done it because he anticipated that she’d intervene, but if that’s the case, it wasn’t made clear at all.

The way Sherlock spoke to the girl on the phone was beautiful. His tone of voice changed, he was patient and calm with her despite the desperate situation he was in. He was soft and comforting and sweet and it made it obvious that he’d be good at taking care of a child.

When Sherlock found out the truth about Redbeard, I cried. I predicted that Eurus killed Redbeard and that it was the reason Sherlock spent so much of his life closed off from emotion and others, but I never expected a plot twist like that! Ugh. It ripped out my heart. Although I did think it was a little odd that Eurus talking about ‘drowned Redbeard’ as a child and that wasn’t enough for her parents to send her away. I mean, that was a child that went missing! And she basically confessed to killing him!

I liked the deduction scene when Sherlock was trying to solve the mystery with the headstones, but it was ruined by that weird-ass reveal that Eurus was the girl on the phone. I knew from the start that the thing with the girl in the plane was not what it seemed, and I honestly did think it was going to turn out to be Eurus when in the earlier scene the audio of the call kept switching between her and the girl. But the resolution of it was really rushed and didn’t make any sense. We saw Eurus talking to Sherlock via webcam, but when he went into the room it was nowhere to be found.

I’ve seen a lot of people complain about John climbing the rope out of the well despite being chained to the floor, but I think it’s more likely that someone climbed down first and freed him with bolt cutters. They just didn’t show it.

When Lestrade said that Sherlock “is a good man,” it felt like I got punched in the stomach. I just watched the pilot a few nights ago and the quote “Maybe someday, if we’re very lucky, he might even be a good [man],” was still fresh in my mind. It was what cemented the episode as the very final finale for me. That’s what you do when you end a show, you bring things full circle.

The little Mystrade moment was pretty great, not gonna lie. It’s not a big ship for me and I’ve only read a couple fics; to be honest, it’s more of a just-for-kicks ship for me, one I never expected to become canon. But now there’s a chance for it and that’s awesome. P.S. Sherlock actually got Lestrade’s name right! :3

That scene with Sherlock and Mycroft’s parents! God, I felt so conflicted; I totally felt like the parents were understandably upset, but at the same time I knew that Mycroft honestly did what he thought was best. And Sherlock sticking up for him was fantastic.

Mary’s final message to the boys was bittersweet for me. It just solidified my feeling that it was really the end, but it was so goddamn beautiful. I’m glad they showed Molly bounding into the room looking happy, otherwise I really would have been worried about her. And it showed them working cases again which was sublime too. But the best was that moment where Sherlock hands Rosie to John and they both look so happy. To me, Johnlock is 100% canon now. I know they could have shown a kiss or confession of love, but they did it their way and it worked.

This episode featured some of the greatest performances we’ve seen yet on this show, particularly from Benedict and Sian (Eurus). They both deserve all the awards for this.

There are a lot of things about this episode that make it great, but because of the extremely rocky beginning and questions left unanswered (I’ll probably make another post for those), it doesn’t make it into my top 5 eps. I still highly enjoyed in though, and while I’d be sad if it was truly the end, I’d be content with the way they left our Baker Street Boys.

#sherlock #sherlock holmes #the final problem #tfp #the final problem spoilers #tfp spoilers #sherlock spoilers #sherlock 4x03 #my thoughts #johnlock #parentlock #mycroft holmes #greg lestrade #molly hooper #irene adler #eurus holmes #jim moriarty #queen #this post is a lot longer than i intended but oh well

[thistownneedsguns]

TTNG Interview // Birthday Cake For Breakfast

I’m stood backstage at ArcTanGent Festival with math-rock heroes TTNG and – first question in – rather than using words to express his feelings following their performance on Thursday evening, drummer Chris Collis highlights the Birthday Cake For Breakfast smiling dog (above) as a visual representation. Vocalist and bassist Henry Tremain and guitarist Tim Collis erupt in laughter, Tim adding further explanation. “For the listener – Picture is dog with Birthday Cake, looking gleeful.”

Having had time to adjust (with Henry suggesting that TTNG would be the dog in the situation, the cake being the audience), Tim reflects further on their performance – commenting at one point that it was likely their best ArcTanGent set to date. “No, it was great. Really great to play in the UK again, ‘cus I guess it’s been a while.” He says. “Yesterday’s response was fucking incredible, like seriously.” Adds Henry. “One of the new songs we have this quiet build up and everyone was clapping along. It was pretty amazing.”

It’s fair to say that ArcTanGent is becoming a regular entry in the social calendars of those with a penchant for math/post/alt-rock and everything in-between. Growing in size year upon year, the organisers outdo themselves when curating incredible line-ups every time. TTNG have become a staple of the festival, having appeared at three of its four outings, matching the likes of And So I Watch You From Afar and Maybeshewill. “We had a break, caught our breath and then we came back to eat some more audience members.” Laughs Henry.

Much like TTNG are becoming a regular fixture of ArcTanGent, so too is the inevitability that the weather will be foul. This year’s festival featured particularly outrageous weather. Almost at Monsoon levels, Fernhill Farm gave Manchester a run for its money with the amount of downpour. It almost made watching bands and drinking beer unbearable… “It’s getting wetter and wetter each time.” Nods Tim.

The spirit of the attendees is always high, mind, and tents are always suitably rammed whatever the weather. Though the main stage has a slight ‘open-air’ issue, as many found out whilst watching Russian Circles a while back. “The first one was awesome, then the second was crazy wet…” Adds Henry. “I remember seeing Russian Circles and getting totally drenched.”

Prior to their return to UK soil and triumphant showing at ArcTanGent, TTNG had been stateside on a run of North American dates throughout August and July with the likes of Lite, Mylets and GIRAFFES? GIRAFFES! A mammoth journey through America, made even sweeter with a number of dates across the run selling out. The secret? “Well we actually have a fan base over there…” Says Henry with a laugh. “It was a good tour, the sales were a lot better than we were expecting – the pre-sales beforehand had us kind of worried. We were feeling like that’s gonna be our last trip out to the states, but it actually went completely in the other direction.”

Sargent House mainstay and running mate of both And So I Watch You From Afar and TTNG (as discussed recently with the former in this interview), Henry Kohen a.k.a. Mylets was along for the ride during their stay in America. There’s an obvious bond between both bands and Henry, the younger Kohen popping up regularly on their various social media accounts whenever they’re in the US. It’s almost as if both bands have taken him under their collective wings, though TTNG jest that it’s likely the other way round. “I think he’s pretty much an integral cog in our machine.” Say Tim of Henry. “He’s awesome to have on tour. He has a multi-functioning role on tour, so he TM’s and drives, plays and techs. It’d be really difficult to do it without him actually. He’s awesome and his music’s great so it’s always cool to play with him.” “He writes these amazing compositions on the fly in the van…” Adds Henry with a laugh.

This is again another period of the interview which would benefit from video evidence or similar, with the trio sharing a laugh reminiscing about the songwriting talents of both Henry’s through the use of a music memo app on an iphone, allowing them to write such improvised van hits as ‘Mummy’ and its sequel ‘Daddy’. A suggested special improvised song for Birthday Cake For Breakfast using said app sadly never materialises.

Away from improvised van recordings, the North American Tour coincided with the release of the band’s third studio album, ‘Disappointment Island’. Recorded live to tape over a ten day period, the trio got together at the infamous Electrical Audio studios in Chicago with Greg Norman, before it was mastered by Bob Weston of Shellac. It was actually in America where TTNG got to shape the eventual album, during a tour with The World Is A Beautiful Place & I Am No Longer Afraid To Die and Foxing. Though the album itself had some uncertainty in the lead up to its completion, as Tim explains. “I think it was good to get it done, for sure. I think there was a time before that we weren’t sure that it was gonna happen. It was kinda pressured to do it like that…” He says. “We kinda just went for it – it’s gotta be done by that time, so… It was helpful to have that.”

“We had kind of finished writing just before the tour and then we used the tour to rehearse the material, get it tour ready so that by the time we were in the studio, we’d kinda ironed out all the kinks and actually learned how to play the songs well enough, with enough energy.” Says Henry. “I think throwing them out in front of an audience is the exact environment where the pressure’s on where you have to get better and play them… I’m sure it led to some right stinkers during some of those shows, but it helped the album.” He laughs. “Possibly another reason why we didn’t think anyone would show up for this tour – hey, here’s the new stuff and it’s all terrible.” Adds Chris with a smirk. “But no, it was a good method. Psychologically I personally felt actually ready to be in the studio, wherein other times it’s just chaos and being really anxious. Sort of knowing that – ok, in theory this is ready, I can play this – was a huge benefit going into the studio.”

Cramming everything into these ten day sessions clearly proved fruitful, though potentially took years off lifetimes, as the mention of their experience in the studio is greeted by a slight sense of dread between the three-piece. Flashbacks of the whip being cracked visible in their eyes. “Stressful.” Confirms Chris when approached on the subject. “I found it stressful.” “I found it incredibly stressful throughout, because the last thing to happen is the vocals.” Adds Henry. “That, for me, is a massive stress. The bit that I really enjoy, which is playing the music bit, was really enjoyable, but there was still this high pitched violin string running in the back of my mind. I was still tense throughout. But, having said that, Electrical Audio where we recorded it is the best place. I absolutely love that place, it just feels like home. Greg, who’s our engineer, is one of the best humans ever. Made us feel totally at home and he’s just funny as fuck. I was having a really bad time doing the vocals, but he’d always manage to say something down the headphones that would put shit in perspective and make me feel good again.”

“Get your head together!” Says Tim with a laugh, before summing up his own experience. “It’s kinda nice as well, because it was a fairly long tour before that, so it wasn’t a very sterile studio at all. It would’ve been weird going to that sort of place after quite a stressful tour. It was really homely, so it was kind of a really cool place to chill out – for the most part. I know I had an easy job, I only had to do one thing, so I had a pretty good time.” “I felt kind of bad at the end of the session, I felt like I was moving out of home.” Adds Henry with a laugh. “It’s got a really nice, homely vibe to it so it’s very relaxing.” Agrees Chris. “Which is good obviously, when you’re in a somewhat pressured environment or situation, I should say.”

Disappointment Island marks the first TTNG album recorded as a three-piece. Following the departure of lead singer and guitar player Stuart Smith and bass player Jamie Cooper over the years, the band transformed and Henry, Tim and Chris carried on as a trio. “It’ll be the last” Comments Chris with a laugh when we discuss the album being put together as a trio. “No, it was great. We’ve been a three-piece for a long time, but obviously trying to play that first album that had four people on it was difficult. So this was great.”

With more room to breath, this allowed for more experimentation, including a new instrument busted out by Henry (though sadly not a ‘Daxaphone’, much to the chagrin of everyone in the band). “Yeah dude, check out the Daxophone. It’s a real instrument.” Laughs Henry. “But yeah, I built this six-string bass baritone guitar that I play, and it was nice to actually – instead of using it to play the space between guitar parts and bass parts – to actually write for that instrument. It was super fun.”

Teasers for Disappointment Island began showing up online in early May in the form of picturesque little vignettes, accompanied by the outline of an island and coordinates. Brilliantly, Fecking Bahamas not only kept track of each individual video but looked up the coordinates online and pipped TTNG to the post regarding the album name (as did a fair few other not-so-lazy fans). The title itself goes back a number of years, with Google acting as inspiration. Much like the artwork that adorns its cover, Disappointment Island was something the trio were unable to forget. “I’ve always wanted to visit.” Confesses Tim with a laugh. “As soon as you find a place like that, there’s so much mystery behind that name.” Adds Henry. “I found it on google earth probably about six/seven years ago, by chance ‘cus I was working as a graphic designer in a print company. We had a slow period, so I would just fly around the planet, checking out Tokyo’s rail networks and then just checking out how big the Pacific Ocean is…” “Turns out it’s pretty big.” Smirks Tim.

As anyone with access to YouTube, Google Earth or countless time-wasting platforms will attest, it’s relatively simple to become obsessed in pointless searches and get lost down a rabbit hole. This became Henry and his virtual flights across the globe, becoming obsessed with minuscule landmasses in the middle of the abyss. It was one such search that resulted in the discovery of ‘Disappointment Island’. “We’ve kind of been joking about it for a while. After the session we recorded with Greg, we went out for some drinks. Tim suggested it jokingly as a title and then it’s like – that’s hilarious, no wait it’s actually kind of perfect. The more we thought about it, the more it made sense.” “It all ties in with quite a few things.” Adds Tim. “I guess Henry can back this up, but perhaps lyrically on some of the topics and subjects he’s writing about. It’s pretty neat really, which is the total opposite of the previous album, which was just random chaos but seemed to also work out.” He laughs.

Similarly, the aforementioned striking artwork for Disappointment Island was practically found out of various fruitless google image searches, trawling through the internet in search of inspiration. The intricate, slightly oddball work of Ukrainian artist and illustrator Irena Zablotska came as love at first sight for the trio, with Henry commenting that the decision was made as soon as they’d caught sight of her work. “She’s incredibly talented.” He says. “There’s some amazing character to the work that she does. We went through and we found that illustration and thought it was perfect for what we wanted.“

At the time of writing, TTNG have finished off their year with a trip to Japan to play with Lite – the cherry on top of a monumental 2016. Their current line-up is stronger than ever, with the trio highlighting this through Disappointment Island. Throughout the interview, the Collis siblings and Henry are joyful, taking the piss and are clearly a tight-knit group. All is going swimmingly then? “We all put on brave faces for these kind of interviews…” Jokes Chris as the others laugh. “Things are going really well. We wanna write some new music I think.” “I’m saving up for a Daxophone.” Grins Henry.

(via Birthday Cake For Breakfast)