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rebeltarot · 2 months

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CAREER ➕ Blessings coming toward you in your career

"I still remember the nights I wished for the things I have now."

[3 piles] ・ [5 decks] ・ [8-10 cards for each pile] ・ [letters, signs, songs]

Hello friends! As we are nearing the end of this quarter I wanted to create a reading all about blessings coming toward you in your career. Please remember that a “blessing” can be anything that protects us, makes us happy, or points us in the right direction. What are your hopes and dreams regarding your career? Do you have any goals you want to achieve in this area this year? Definitely let me know. Regardless of what you are hoping for, I wish you all the best and lots of luck. ♡♡

Painting: Dancers, Pink and Green by Edgar Degas (ca. 1890)

Helpful Links: How to choose your pile ➕ Request a reading

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PILE 01 ➕

Disclaimer: All Tarot readings on this blog are meant for entertainment purposes only. My Pick-a-card readings are based on my knowledge of the tarot and my intuition. Tarot is a divination tool and should not be considered a replacement for medical or professional guidance. It is not intended to be used as such, and any choices made in response to my readings are your own responsibility. All interpretations are speculative, and whether you believe in it is your choice. Readings are for self-reflection purposes only; take what resonates, and leave the rest. My readings are timeless unless stated otherwise.

CONFIRMATION

Signs and confirmation that this is your pile. This can be anything from your initials, astrological placements, significant messages or signs, places, songs, etc. Please use your discernment.

C, A, R, E, E, I, 3rd House, Mercury, Scorpio

Song: Mother's Daughter (R3HAB Remix) - Miley Cyrus

BLESSINGS COMING TOWARD YOU IN YOUR CAREER

Tarot: 5 of cups, 10 of cups, the sun, the devil rx, 9 of pentacles rx

Oracle: the dragon, the king, emotion, imum coeli, moon in leo

Hello, Pile 01, and welcome to your reading. Please remember that a “blessing” can be anything that protects us, makes us happy, or points us in the right direction. With the 5 of cups, it feels like for the longest time you were struggling in your career. This does not necessarily mean that there was no progress, but it was not emotionally fulfilling for you. This could also talk about a lack-mindset in terms of your career, i.e., not feeling worthy of it or not seeing a future with it. Some of you might feel like an imposter in your current position. Yes, you are wearing the title, but you do not feel like you deserve it. This is where your blessing is happening. It's going to address your hustling mentality and your superficiality in your career. It feels like you might have given more than you were able to, pouring from an empty cup just to feel like you deserve to be where you are. Whatever you were doing, it's unsustainable. I feel like you were once very passionate about your current career but fell out of love with it because you were overworking yourself too much, nearly burning out. What I see coming towards you is something that most would consider extremely lucky, as we have the ladybug in the imagery of this card. 10's in tarot talk about an excess of energy; in this case, it's positive energy. Something significant will happen that will indicate the end of one cycle and ring in a new one of abundance and emotional fulfillment. Your cards are not saying what is going to happen, just how it will affect you, and my god, pile 01, you're going to be so happy with this change. The sun is following the 10 of cups. You will experience a lot of success in your career, which will bring you lots of abundance. There is a sense of alignment and harmony. This most likely refers to your mindset. I feel like you are going to check yourself, and seek out an environment that fulfills you. Implementing the changes that need to be made to end this cycle of adversity and struggle. This is truly a positive spread, especially with the devil reversed ending this. You will step into self-empowerment. There is a sense of breaking free from things (be they people, situations, or mindsets) that held you prisoner. I see you freeing yourself from this hustling mindset and stepping into a deeper understanding of your wants and needs. It feels like you will pay attention to more than your salary in whatever you are doing next. You won't just be swayed by a fancy title and a big paycheck; you are digging deeper; you are looking for and finding something that is truly fulfilling. This does not mean that we are talking about a new job here or a new position. Not necessarily. But rather, I see this as you taking on a new perspective and thus realigning yourself with who you are, including your values and your desires. I see you detaching from superficial aspects of your career and digging deeper into what you need to feel fulfilled.

The dragon and the king are both confirming what we have already seen with the devil reversed. You are stepping into your power and taking charge instead of letting superficial aspects control you. It never brought you any satisfaction. I see you taking charge, especially in terms of legalities. Maybe you are renegotiating your contract, or you are signing a new one, but either way, it's all happening because you wish it to happen, meaning you are initiating it and taking charge of it. This pile is mostly about emotional fulfillment and not so much about the superficial aspects of your career, because it feels like the majority of this pile is already well-established in their career. This is a change and a blessing happening at the root of things. It's about values, fulfillment, alignment, and resonance. I feel like you were growing a massive tree on shallow roots, and your blessing is that you are accommodating your tree and allowing it to grow sustainable and strong roots. Again, it's not necessarily a career change; this might only apply to a very small percentage of this group. For most, this talks about working with what you have, not uprooting your career, but nurturing the soil and foundation that you hold. As I have said, for most of you, this is a mindset shift followed by minor changes, maybe in terms of working hours, etc. I feel like you might bring new ideas into your career, expanding what you are already doing and incorporating a more creative element into it. Others might share an idea, be it for a project, etc., which will allow you to turn your dreams into reality. Either way, needs that have not been met before are now being met, and whatever you wish for will find solid footing soon. It will manifest in your life. Fulfillment is coming.

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PILE 02 ➕

CONFIRMATION

Signs and confirmation that this is your pile. This can be anything from your initials, astrological placements, significant messages or signs, places, songs, etc. Please use your discernment.

O, blank, G, A, K, E, 6th House, Mercury, Gemini

Song: All for us - Labrinth

BLESSINGS COMING TOWARD YOU IN YOUR CAREER

Tarot: the emperor, ace of cups, 2 of wands, king of cups rx

Oracle: trust, healing, midheaven, solar eclipse

Hello, Pile 02, and welcome to your reading. Please remember that a “blessing” can be anything that protects us, makes us happy, or points us in the right direction. It feels like you are feeling overwhelmed, my dear pile 02. When it comes to your career, it seems like you are feeling quite anxious and detached. You might even be withdrawing from it in one way or another. I heard "quiet quitting" while writing this. Whatever the current situation at your work is, it's far from ideal. It feels like you are holding back anger too. This is a very specific thing I see, but I feel like some of you might have felt betrayed. You are not showing it, but you are also not ignoring whatever has happened and led to your feeling of turmoil. You are actively taking away your effort to balance the scales quietly. Again, this might apply to just a handful of you, but the King of Cups, as our bottom deck, is looking upset and vindictive. The good news is that you are taking charge, my dear pile 02. Your blessing is that you take authority over this situation and maneuver whatever has happened that led to you withdrawing from your career into a success story for yourself. It feels like you are taking the cup you are holding, and instead of withholding it from everyone, including yourself, you are pouring your energy and your efforts into yourself. You are "upgrading" yourself, is what I heard. Interesting; this pile is very vocal. So maybe you are speaking up for yourself. Whatever it is, it's been a long time coming, and it relates to something you have held on to for quite some time. Your blessing is that you create stability. A new beginning is awaiting. It can relate to a brand new position, a job at a new company, or even your own business. Whatever the case may be, I see you in a leading position. And you are comfortable there. Maybe the King of Cups, in reverse, talked about suppressing your leadership talent and making you uncomfortable and upset. Either way, this new position of leadership will give you a whole new beginning, especially emotionally. I am hearing "clean slate." This is such a vocal pile! Someone might be giving you their scepter; for some, it might not be a voluntary handoff, but either way, it will be fulfilling for you. I see you climbing the ladder. Whatever your goals are in your career, you are getting closer to them. Plans are being made. For some, it might even relate to a position overseas. For sure, big decisions are made relating to the future. Both for you and for your career.

Trust is your next card. With the King of Cups reversed, this is slow-moving energy. It's not something that happens overnight. Especially since for some of you, the handover is not made willingly (i.e., the person leaving said position does not want to do so). Your guides are asking you to trust the process. Trust that what you are going through is meant to happen and that what is promised to you will happen. You are currently in the healing stages, but your career journey (your negative experience right now) is soon coming to a pinnacle. You are going to reach your goals faster than you might have anticipated. A solar eclipse might be significant. This could be an indicator of timing. Either way, this new beginning, this rebirth of yours, is your blessing, and it will come with a handful of opportunities. I see you regaining your passion and your inspiration, and you will feel at home in this position of leadership that is soon to come.

Your reblogs are highly appreciated. Thank you so much for supporting my work!

PILE 03 ➕

CONFIRMATION

Signs and confirmation that this is your pile. This can be anything from your initials, astrological placements, significant messages or signs, places, songs, etc. Please use your discernment.

O, B, G, A, 8th house, Uranus, Virgo

Song: Only You - Eddie Benjamin, Alessia Cara

BLESSINGS COMING TOWARD YOU IN YOUR CAREER

Tarot: 6 of wands, wheel of fortune rx, the star, King of swords rx, judgment

Oracle: the wasp, energy, jupiter, lunar eclipse

Hello, Pile 03, and welcome to your reading. Please remember that a “blessing” can be anything that protects us, makes us happy, or points us in the right direction. Wow, this is a pile with a bunch of major arcana. Whatever is happening for you, it sure is significant. Your situation is not easy, and it seems complicated. Interestingly, your tarot cards are telling a story and leading into your blessing. You are someone who is established, successful, highly regarded at work, and known for the great results you bring. Your peers do not doubt your skill set. However, it feels like whenever you hit a goal or whenever you experience a win, the wheel is turning sharply for you. Every hit of luck is met with a hit of misfortune. It does not have to be major, though it feels this way to you. It's something you might already be anticipating. However, your prospects are bright, my dear pile 3. How about a mindset shift? Instead of the bad following the good, how about the good following the bad? It's so interesting, your pile. Your blessing is your faith and your hope. This might sound anticlimactic, but it's the most powerful blessing one can get. Luck is unpredictable and unreliable. But hope and faith in yourself and your abilities? Confidence? That's something that can get you places. It's something that leads to intrinsic motivation and actions being taken. Your hope means pouring into yourself, tending the garden of your soul, and allowing things to sprout and bloom for you. Again, bright prospects for you. You will be blessed with an idea and inspiration. This vision will fertilize your soil, and it will allow you to make your wildest dreams come true. Your pile is so interesting because we have a good card followed by a challenging card, and so on, but eventually, we are ending your spread with a positive one. It's reminding me of a seesaw, and I swear it's giving me whiplash. You might feel this way. Having a bad thing leads to a good thing, and vice versa. But again, your ability to keep your head held high and your ability to still believe is a true blessing in and of itself. I feel like you are lying to yourself with the king of swords in reverse. You might feel like you are crumbling under all this pressure and under all these changes that seem to follow you around, but you are not. You are growing in your power, your ability, and your adaptability because that is the skill set that you need. That's the skillset that will bring you far and eventually to a lot of abundance. Your blessing, ultimately, is a rebirth of the self with the judgment card. You will receive an idea, an epiphany. This will lead to you finding your purpose and a renewal of your career. This seems to be such a common theme across all piles, but to me, in your pile, this sounds like growth. It sounds like a level-up. In your pile, especially, we can see the impact that it will have on your life with those three major Arcana cards. It's the birth of something. This is my entrepreneurial pile. I feel like most people in this pile either run their own business or want to do so at some point. Either way, you are birthing something, and it will lead to you having people against you. It's not an easy journey, but it is very well worth it.

The wasp is confirming the king of swords, Rx, in its message. Someone will not be happy about your wins. Do you know what is so funny in your pile, though? The wasp card is followed by the energy card, which has oranges depicted on it. And you know what repels wasps? You are right about citrus fruits, which oranges are. Your energy, the essence of who you are, is so strong and so powerful that those people just cannot touch you even if they try. Your ability to believe and to push through adversity makes you unstoppable. Whatever path you are choosing to walk, it's less traveled, one that is hard, and that takes a lot of power and will. Not everyone can achieve what you set out to achieve, leading to people envying you. But again, these people are an annoyance at worst; they are unable to touch you or your bag. And abundance is waiting for you, for sure. All your hard work and all the adversities you are facing are eventually there to help you grow and lead you toward success. Yes, it might feel like whiplash sometimes with all those huge wins being met with huge obstacles, but what is waiting for you is unmatched my dear pile three. Eventually, you will get whatever you desire, and then some. For that to happen, you have to go through a transformation, and we all know that growing pains hurt. But you will come out on the other side as a winner. Remember that you are always protected.

Your reblogs are highly appreciated. Thank you so much for supporting my work!

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yamayuandadu · 4 months

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Tenshō Daijin: the many guises of medieval Amaterasu (part 1)

I’ve been working on this article on and off since late 2021, and it’s the longest one I’ve published on my blog so far (some of my wikipedia contributions are bigger, but that’s a separate matter). In fact, it's so long I have to split it into two due to limitations of tumblr's post editor.

When most people speak of “Japanese mythology”, 99% of the time they effectively think just of the Kojiki and Nihon Shoki (with some night parade scrolls sprinkled in, maybe, even though that’s not really mythology, but Edo period popular entertainment). The goal of this article is to challenge this incorrect view, and to shed some light on the mythology of the Japanese “middle ages” - roughly between the 11th and the 16th centuries. I decided to use Amaterasu as the main topic, as it’s hard to think of a better way to showcase how much mythology remains outside the general perception than using a figure who, at least at first glance, is well known as an example. From Brahma longing for a friend to Yang Guifei surviving own death, I’m sure everyone will find something new here. Myths obviously aren’t all that will be covered here, though. I’ll also discuss the theological doctrines which flourished in the middle ages, with a particular emphasis on honji suijaku, their social context, and more. You will be able to find out what rituals focused on Amaterasu had to do with Enma and Taizan Fukun, how economic woes of the Outer Shrine of Ise impacted Brahma’s role in Japan, why some secrets existed only to be deliberately revealed, and more.

Kami and Buddhism

In order to discuss the development of Amaterasu’s character and her associations with other figures through the middle ages, as well as the myths which developed as a result, I’ll first need to summarize the nature of interactions between kami and Buddhism through the Nara, Heian and medieval periods. I’m specifically saying kami, as opposed to Shinto, for reasons which will become clear later. It seems that at first the relation was rather standard as far as early interactions between Buddhism and preexisting religious traditions in areas where it was introduced go. Mark Teeuwen singles out Tibet and various kingdoms corresponding to parts of present day Myanmar as examples particularly similar, though obviously not identical, to early Japan. The parallel developments concerned the Bön faith in the former and the beliefs pertaining to the nat in the latter. The early sources appear to indicate that kami were envisioned as beings who need to strive towards enlightenment themselves. Recitation of sutras was described as a way to bring them closer to that state. However, some rather quickly started to be viewed as active protectors of Buddhism. As early as 741 Hachiman was already regarded as such, for instance. Additionally, combinative “shrine-temples” already existed in the same period too, attesting to a fusion of Buddhism and preexisting tradition.

A schematic representation of some examples of the honji suijaku from the Kasuga mandala (wikimedia commons)

A breakthrough occurred in the ninth century, with the development of honji suijaku (本地垂迹) - the theory on kami being “traces” or “emanations” (suijaku) of Buddhist figures, referred to as “original sources” (honji). Similar theories regarding Daoist figures were at times advanced by Chinese Buddhist scholars as early as in the fifth century, so it was hardly an unparalleled development, though its scope was fairly unique. By the end of the Heian period, honji suijaku became the default mode of understanding kami.

A common misunderstanding today is that honji suijaku meant exact correspondence between a single Buddha and a single kami. In reality, what it created is a “fluid pantheon”, to borrow the title of one of Bernard Faure’s books dealing with this phenomenon. Connections between specific kami and Buddhas (or bodhisattvas) certainly were often established. However, that was not all.

Kami could be connected to other kami, and Buddhas to other Buddhas; and on top of that both groups belonged to an elaborate network which also included devas, wisdom kings, astral deities, legendary heroes and historical figures from various countries (for example Daoist immortals), and beings which defy classification altogether. In Keiran Shūyōshū (溪嵐拾葉集), the notion of honji suijaku is even extended to silkworms (their honji is Aśvaghoṣa). Multiple identifications could coexist, sometimes in the same sources. On top of that, individual figures could change classification depending on context.

The new theological ideas also lead to the formation of new myths, collectively referred to as chūsei shinwa (中世神話; “medieval mythology”). As summarized by Sujung Kim, this term encompasses both the myths which arose in the Japanese “middle ages”, the Kamakura and Muromachi periods (1185-1600), and modern study of them. A closely related, though more narrow, term is chūsei nihongi (中世日本紀), which refers specifically to reinterpretations of preexisting classical myths, for example Nihon Shoki, from the same times.

One of the primary goals of the new myths was to create a metaphorical bridge between Japan and the lands described in Buddhist literature transmitted from China, Korea and beyond. Sutras and other literature were often set in fabulous distant kingdoms or in supernatural realms. At the same time, the material reality of Buddhism tied it to local institutions and landscape. As a result, the local was imbued with a new, universal meaning.

As Mark Teeuwen put it in his article The Buddhist Roots of Japanese Nativism, medieval literature “allowed a local warlord to pose as a golden cakravartin, a local mountain to take on the guise of the cosmic Mt. Sumeru, a local deity to embody an aspect of the World Buddha, and a local rite to aspire to the universal aim of bringing salvation to all sentient beings.” At the same time, the universal gained a local dimension, making it easier to grasp and more approachable.

However, that was hardly the end, more like the beginning - yet another prominent change which occurred over the course of the 12th and 13th centuries resulted in the formation of a new belief: select kami were in fact not emanations of secondary importance of Buddhist figures, but direct representations of enlightenment. These developments eventually culminated in what is sometimes described as “reverse honji suijaku”: Buddhas and bodhisattvas were merely manifestations of primordial kami, not the other way around.

The motivations behind the development of these ideas are not clear. While especially in the past it was commonly assumed that they represented the beginning of a “pristinely Japanese” spirituality reasserting itself against “foreign” Buddhism, most of the theologians involved were Buddhists themselves, or at least enthusiastically drew inspiration from Buddhist sources. Mark Teeuwen and Fabio Rambelli suggest they might have been motivated by a desire to take Buddhist theology to logical extremes in order to investigate the nature of reality before the emergence of the first Buddha and the current kalpa.

Furthermore, in addition to lofty theological speculation material motivations might have been at play. Many of the advocates of reverse honji suijaku might have been so-called “shrine monks”, tasked with maintaining the shrine parts of religious complexes. Possibly their need for broader recognition and greater authority made them keen on such theological reversals. This is ultimately speculative, though.

Curiously, reverse honji suijaku arguably might have led to the creation of Shinto in the modern sense. While the phrase 神道 has a long history, and it is applied to intellectual and religious movements active in the middle ages in modern literature (for example, the treatises of a certain priestly family I’ll discuss are often called “Watarai Shinto”), there is no strong evidence that it was commonly understood as shintō in the modern sense - a distinct religious tradition - predating an explicit statement in a treatise from 1419 written by the Tendai monk Rysōhen dealing with these topics. In the earliest sources the default reading was jindō, referring not exactly to a distinct system of beliefs, but rather to a “realm”of kami ultimately existing in Buddhist context. While Shinto did eventually develop into the tradition which came to define the kami, through the middle ages and the Edo period which followed, honji suijaku was the dominant paradigm, and permeated all spheres of society.

The early history of Amaterasu: sun, textiles and longing for companionship

An Edo period painting of Amaterasu emerging from the cave, by Kunisada Utagawa (wikimedia commons)

While the explanation of the basic nomenclature and a crash course in interactions between Buddhism and kami is now out of the way, before I’ll be able to move on to the impact of the medieval ideas on Amaterasu I need to briefly summarize her earlier history.

Through the article I will simply use the name Amaterasu consistently. However, it should be noted that the standard form of the name, 天照大神, in the middle ages and in the Edo period was often read not as Amaterasu Ōkami, but rather as Tenshō Daijin, in accordance with on’yomi or “Sino-Japanese” sign values. Therefore, don’t be surprised that this is the version used in titles of historical works mentioned. As a curiosity it is worth mentioning that this is actually the reading used fairly consistently in the first western source with reasonably reliable information about Amaterasu (unless I missed something even earlier), Engelbert Kaempfer's History of Japan from 1727.

On a similar note, I generally stick to describing Amaterasu as female. However, it needs to be pointed out that through the middle ages and in the Edo period male Amaterasu is also attested, depending on the source either replacing the female version or coexisting with her. Some modern authors go as far as speculating if Amaterasu wasn’t originally seen as male prior to being redefined as female, but this is not really fully provable. The existence of a tradition according to which Amaterasu manifested in male form is already mentioned by the Tendai monk Jien (1155-1225). There are also sources providing ambiguous information about Amaterasu’s gender. In at least some cases such phenomena were a result of identification with figures either regarded as male or portrayed as androgynous in art, as I outlined in a recent article discussing the case of Amaterasu and Uho Dōji (who won’t be brought up here in any meaningful capacity, since I'm not going to focus on the Edo period). It’s not really possible to make a blanket statement on this matter, though.

Additionally it’s important to bear in mind that identification between two figures could transcend the gender of the parties involved. As you’ll see later, there were even cases of Amaterasu’s identification with a male figure actually resulting in traditions particularly strongly emphasizing her typical gender.

The Inner Shrine at Ise in 2008 (wikimedia commons)

Throughout her entire history Amaterasu has been associated with Ise and its Grand Shrine. According to the Nihon Shoki, that’s where she originally descended from heaven to earth, and where she later returned in order to be enshrined. The term “Ise Grand Shrine” actually refers to a complex centered on two major shrines, though, and only one of them, the Inner Shrine (内宮, naikū), is dedicated to Amaterasu. The kami of the Outer Shrine (外宮, gekū) is instead Toyouke.

The earliest history of Amaterasu is effectively unknowable due to lack of available sources. While she does appear both in the Kojiki and Nihon Shoki in a central role, both of these works only date to the eighth century, and their historicity is often at best dubious. When exactly was her shrine originally established is a matter of debate: supporters of treating Nihon Shoki literally argue for 4 BCE (during the reign of the legendary emperor Suinin), but historians and archeologists favor more vague dating to either the fourth, fifth or seventh century. The earliest detailed records of specific religious ceremonies at Ise can only be found in an administrative protocol compiled in 804.

Historically it was quite popular among researchers to essentially assume being a personification of the sun is all there ever was to Amaterasu’s character, and that she derives her importance entirely from her solar role. Today this view is no longer accepted quite as firmly, and it is even sometimes questioned if this was necessarily her original function, though this is ultimately neither entirely provable nor fully relevant here.

Obviously, the classical Amaterasu also served as a royal deity presented as an ancestor of Japan’s imperial lineage. She was also treated as a symbolic source of its authority by extension of her role as a heavenly ruler commanding the kami. This is an example of the well documented phenomenon of clan kami (氏神, ujigami). However, based on archeological data Ise was not particularly important early on in Japanese history, and the area around it was sparsely populated as late as in the seventh century On top of that it would appear that, if the early texts are to be believed, emperors actually had an ambivalent relationship with her. It has been suggested that her classical position was only established during the reign of emperor Tenmu in the late seventh century, perhaps due to his personal connection to clans from the Ise area.

It’s important to stress here that on multiple occasions in history, in particular recent history, the connection between Amaterasu and emperors was channeled to nationalist and imperialist purposes. For instance, the Japanese colonial government in Korea funded the construction of a complex enshrining Amaterasu and emperor Meiji in the 1920s, and subsequently legally obliged students (among others) to attend ceremonies held there to foster loyalty.

The Outer Shrine in 2015 (wikimedia commons)

A key moment in the early history of Amaterasu was the introduction of the kami Toyouke (豊宇; literally “abundant food”) to Ise. A legend about her arrival is preserved in the aforementioned administrative protocol from 804. According to it, Amaterasu appeared to emperor Yūryaku (second half of the fifth century, if his historicity is to be accepted) in a dream to let him know that she is distressed and lonely, and on top of that can’t receive offerings of food according to proper protocol. She explained that the only way to solve all of these problems is to bring her a kami responsible for divine food (御饌津神, miketsu kami), Toyouke, who is to be found in Hiji no Manai in the Tanba Province. Thanks to this precise guidance, the emperor was able to instantly solve the problem, and Toyouke was moved to Ise, where she symbolically took the responsibility for food offered to Amaterasu.

Presumably, the legend contains at least a kernel of truth, and Toyouke was initially enshrined in a facility meant to fulfill a specific ritual role for the Inner Shrine, which in time grew to rival it in size and importance. Save for these details, much about the early history of Toyouke is even more unclear than in the case of Amaterasu, though. She is only mentioned in passing in the Kojiki under the name Toyoukehime no Kami (豊受姫神) in the account of the birth of Wakumusubi no Kami (和久産巣日神), one of the many kami who came into being as a result of Izanami’s death. However, this passage does not provide any information about her character, it merely states that she is Wakumusubi’s child. This tradition was of limited, if any, interest to the Outer Shrine clergy through the middle ages, as I’ll later demonstrate.

While Wakumusubi also appears in the Nihon Shoki, though with a slightly different genealogy, Toyouke is entirely absent from this work. You can find a claim on the contrary in Michael Como’s Weaving and Binding. Immigrant Gods and Female Immortals in Ancient Japan, but he essentially treats Ukemochi as identical with Toyouke and asserts the myth about Tsukuyomi killing the former is effectively about the latter. It doesn’t seem like any subsequent publications picked up this idea.

The final early source of information about Toyouke is the Tango no Kuni Fudoki (丹後国風土記; “Records of the Tango Province”). It presents her as one of eight “heavenly women” (天津乙女, amatsuotome) who at some point arrived at a spring near Mount Hiji to bathe. An old couple stole the clothes of one of them, rendering her unable to return to heaven. They subsequently ask her to become their daughter, since they have no children. She agrees, and for ten years lives with them, brewing sake which could magically heal “ten thousand ills”. The old man and woman prosper thanks to her. However, they eventually decide to tell her that she is not really their child, and should go back to heaven. She tells them that she has lived among humans for so long this is not an option for her anymore, and leaves in anger. She only calms down after reaching a different village, Nagu, where she is eventually enshrined under the variant name Toyoukanome no Mikoto (豊宇賀能売命). Due to involving a heavenly being having to stay on earth due to her clothes being stolen, this myth has been compared to the better known Hagoromo. Michael Como also argues that it might reflect the perception of Toyouke as a Daoist immortal (hence her ability to bew something akin to the fabled Daoist alchemical elixirs meant to prolong life), similarly to how the legend of Urashima Taro does. While I found his Nihon Shoki argument somewhat dubious as I said, I think this is an interesting point which warrants further study. Similar possibility about Toyouke’s character has been suggested by Bernard Faure too.

It’s also worth noting a possible reference to the Tango no Kuni Fudoki myth has been identified in a painting of the two shrines of Ise from the collection of Shōryakuji, a Buddhist temple located in Nara (seen above; screencapped from Talia J. Andrei's Mapping Sacred Spaces: Representations of Pleasure and Worship in Sankei Mandara, for educational purposes only). It depicts eight female figures standing on a cloud around a container used to make sake in the proximity of the Outer Shrine.

Amaterasu and Buddhism: the ambivalent beginnings

Early sources pertaining to Ise discussed in the previous section are invaluable when it comes to Amaterasu’s position and her connection with Toyouke, but they don’t really shed any light on the development of associations between her and Buddhist figures. Quite the opposite - they indicate that around the year 800, even basic Buddhist terms like “pagoda”, “monk” or “sutra” were considered taboo (忌み, imi) by priests of the Inner Shrine, much like these pertaining to conventional sources of religious impurity like violence, death or illness. However, Mark Teeuwen notes at the same time these very priests most likely took part in Buddhist ceremonies themselves, and there is even some evidence that in the eighth century a Buddhist temple existed in Ise.

The reasons behind the implementation of the taboo were likely largely political, rather than strictly religious. For context: in the second half of the eighth century, empress Shōtoku famously appointed Buddhist monks to various prestigious positions in the royal court. Dōkyō from the Hossō school was even temporarily elevated basically to the rank of her equal (though he eventually fell from grace). This was generally poorly received by other officials, who might have viewed it as an attempt at establishing Buddhist theocracy in place of hereditary monarchy. This in turn likely led to tensions and fueled various succession controversies in subsequent decades. Further problems, like untimely deaths or exile of various members of the imperial family, kept accumulating, and by 804 the prestige of the court was severely damaged. Furthermore, there is evidence that there were various economic conflicts of interest between the Ise clergy and local Buddhist monks.

A sixteenth century painting of emperor Kanmu (wikimedia commons)

Since the oldest source to mention the taboo is an administrative, rather than religious, text, it is not impossible that it was intended by emperor Kanmu as a way to diffuse all these social and political tensions. Mark Teeuwen suggests his goal might have been a way to restore the prestige of his family and create a center of symbolic ancestral cult which would offer him additional legitimacy independent from the Buddhist establishment residing in Nara, which was crucial for many of the previous emperors. As a lifelong student of Confucian philosophy, he likely found many models to draw from in Chinese texts. His vision of Ise was presumably that of an ancestral mausoleum.

Regardless of Kanmu’s decisions, in the long run Buddhism retained its influence in royal affairs. In fact, it was arguably this emperor himself who indirectly caused its revitalization. In 804, he sent two young monks, Saichō and Kūkai, to China. They returned with something previously largely unknown in Japan: esoteric Buddhism. The new schools they established, Tendai and Shingon, captivated the imagination of virtually all strata of society in the nascent middle ages.

Amaterasu, too, came under esoteric Buddhist influence, and gained new roles, often completely detached from her earlier character - or at the very least from the part of it firmly tied just to the ruling family. Mark Teeuwen partially jokingly refers to this chapter in her history as an “escape” from Ise and notes that for a time she has “shaken off the imperial shackles”. There was a material aspect to these processes in addition to the purely theological considerations. In the Kamakura period, the role of warrior classes grew and the imperial court weakened. As a result, the Ise clergy - the Arakida clan of the Inner Shrine and the Watarai clan of the Outer Shrine - gained greater autonomy. The emperors weren’t able to enforce a symbolic monopoly on Ise, which therefore no longer served just as a center of ancestral cult. The downside was the loss of most of the imperial funding, which necessitated innovation to secure other sources of patronage.

The Ise taboos established earlier were not exactly abandoned, but the clergy found ways around them in order to enable Amaterasu to thrive in this new environment. A summary of the theological solution they developed is provided in Nakatomi Harae Kunge (中臣祓訓解; “Reading and Explanation of the Nakatomi Purification Formula) from the late twelfth century: “although on the surface performing ceremonies which are different from the Buddhist teachings, [Amaterasu] in essence protects the Buddhist laws.” Additionally, a myth reinterpreting one of the most famous episodes from the entire Buddhist canon, but with Amaterasu as a new protagonist, was developed to justify the taboo’s existence. I’ll discuss it in a separate section later on.

The reinvention was evidently successful. There is little evidence for widespread worship of Amaterasu in earlier periods. She was effectively little more than a royal deity. Even courtiers had limited, if any, knowledge of her. Only in the middle ages did she come to be widely recognized as a major figure in the Japanese religious landscape among all strata of society. Paradoxically it was the partial detachment from the imperial family that let Amaterasu claim a uniquely elevated position in the pantheon.

One of the best sources of evidence of Amaterasu’s newfound popularity are standardized oath formulas (起請文, kishōmon). In the Kamakura period, she came to appear in them quite frequently. She was invoked either simply as the foremost kami, or alternatively as the “lord of the land” (ie. Japan; 国主, kokushu). Either way, her purpose, much like those of other of the invoked figures, was to guarantee the oath will be upheld, and to punish those who will break it.

The spread of Amaterasu to new audiences resulted in the rise of numerous new interpretations. That’s where the already briefly discussed idea of honji suijaku came into play.

A twelfth century painting of the Buddha Dainichi (wikimedia commons)

As I said earlier, despite the popular understanding of this term honji suijaku did not necessarily just signify correspondences between kami and buddhas. However, in Amaterasu’s case the earliest example actually does match this model. She came to be associated with the Buddha Dainichi (大日, literally “great sun”; from Sanskrit Vairocana).

Some authors, like Bernard Faure, argue that the establishment of a link between Amaterasu and Dainichi was effectively the core of the early honji suijaku as a whole. Purportedly the belief that a connection existed between them went all the way back to the teachings of the famous monk Gyōki, active in the first half of the eighth century. The historicity of this claim is uncertain, but it was understood as historical truth in the discussed time periods, at the very least. Anna Andreeva, relying on earlier studies by Satoshi Itō, notes that it would appear Seizon’s (成尊; 1012–1074) Shingon Fuhō San'yōshō (眞言付法纂要抄; “An Abbreviated Compendium of the Transmission of Shingon Buddhism) from 1060 has a strong claim to being the oldest attested example which can be properly dated.

While other Buddhas, such as the historical Buddha, Amida (Amitābha), Miroku (Maitreya) or Yakushi (Bhaiṣajyaguru), are obviously also present in Japanese Buddhism, historically, especially prior to the rise of Amida-centrist schools, Dainichi was by far the most important one. This is especially pronounced in Shingon, where he is recognized as the “first Buddha” (Ādi-Buddha). Dainichi’s importance coupled with his solar associations made him a suitable match for Amaterasu in the eyes of theologians. Amaterasu’s solar role is pretty widely acknowledged in Buddhist sources, and she could be labeled as a “solar deity”, nisshin (日神). She was also identified with Nittenshi (日天子), the Buddhist version of the Hindu sun god Surya. However, Nittenshi could also function as a distinct figure and had his own iconography.

A twelfth century hanging scroll showing Nittenshi in the company of attendants (Kyoto National Museum; reproduced here for educational purposes only)

The development of a connection between Amaterasu and Dainichi brought a number of changes to Ise. As an extension of it, the Inner Shrine and Outer Shrine at Ise came to be identified with the Womb Realm mandala and the Diamond Realm mandala, closely associated with him.

The Ise clergy additionally argued that the taboo observed as the shrines does not impact Amaterasu’s connection to Dainichi - rather she (and by extension Toyouke as well) represents not a mere trace of this Buddha, but “original enlightenment” (hongaku). A new systematization of kami was built around the idea: at Ise, only Amaterasu and Toyouke were regarded as belonging to the category of “kami of original enlightenment”, with other divided into “kami of inception of enlightenment” (those who had to actively embrace Buddhism) and “kami of delusion” (those who opposed it). Similar categories were employed in different areas too, though, with the head local kami, for example Suwa Daimyōjin or Sannō (山王), taking the same role as Amaterasu at Ise. While Dainichi can be considered Amaterasu’s essential honji suijaku pair, I already pointed out, it was hardly unusual for a specific figure to develop multiple connections within the honji suijaku framework, though, and this holds true for her too.

Amaterasu, Enma and other functionaries of the underworld

Enmaten (wikimedia commons)

Next to Dainichi, Amaterasu’s best attested Buddhist “counterpart” is not a Buddha, but rather a deva, specifically Enma, the judge of the dead. While many other devas present in Japanese Buddhism largely languish in obscurity today, at least in popular perception, he is probably the most recognizable one next to the Four Heavenly Kings, so I do not think much of an introduction is needed. Even if you are not particularly interested in the history of religions, chances are you’ve seen him in one piece of media or another.

Technically there are two distinct forms of Enma in Japanese tradition - Enmaten (焔摩天), who is more of a “classical” Hindu-style deva fairly similar in appearance to the original Yama, and the more popular Enma-ō (閻魔王; “king Enma”), styled after the bureaucratic Chinese underworld deities - but this distinction is not very important here. His rise to prominence in Japan started in the early ninth century at the latest, and by the ten century he was also joined by Taizan Fukun (東岳大帝; originally Taishan Fujun), a similar deity incorporated into Buddhism from Daoism. The latter was essentially the model for all of the other judges of the underworld: from the Buddhist kings of hell, to various local gods who took this role in the popular religion of Qing China. He might have even influenced the development of Matarajin in medieval Japan, but that’s a topic for another time.

It seems that a link between Amaterasu and Enma was initially established through an intermediary, specifically Seoritsuhime (瀬織津姫). She is identified with the king of hell in the Nakatomi Harae Kunge. While much about this text remains a mystery, in this case the logic behind the equation is quite clear - both of them were invoked during ritual purification. The means were not quite the same: Enma throws the sources of impurity into the deepest hells, while Seoritsuhime casts them into the ocean. Still, the level of similarity was sufficient to warrant establishing a connection.

Seoritsuhime is described both as a servant of Amaterasu, and as her aramitama (荒魂), literally “rough spirit”. This term designates the wrathful, or at least impulsive, aspect of a given kami. In Nakatomi Harae Kunge Seoritsuhime as a manifestation of Amaterasu is also more specifically described as ara-tenshi (荒天子), “heavenly emperor manipulating the brutish force”.

An Edo period depiction of Taga Myōjin from the collection of Kyoto City University of Arts (via Bernard Faure's Fluid Pantheon; reproduced here for educational purposes only)

Tenshō Daijin Kuketsu (天照大神口決; “Oral Transmission Pertaining to Tenshō Daijin”), a fourteenth century theological treatise, also embraces the equation between Enma and Amaterasu. It explains that he corresponds to the form of Amaterasu associated with the Taga shrine, Taga Myōjin (多賀明神). She has a distinct iconography, and fairly consistently appears as a horsewoman on either a black or white steed (always shown frontally), with a sword in one hand and a box with a sutra in the other. The same source also equates Amaterasu with Godō Daishin (五道大神; originally Wudao Dashen), the “god of the five paths”, another king of hell. In the Nakatomi Harae Kunge, it is instead a purifying kami, Haya-Akitsuhime (速秋津比売神), “the beloved of the dragon king Nanda”, who corresponds to him, though. The passage establishing this also mentions a similar link between yet another purifying kami, Ibukidonushi, and Taizan Fukun (curiously, the explanatory line states that the river where Izanagi purified himself after fleeing from Izanami is identical with Mt. Tai, the residence of Taizan Fukun). However, the latter is also said to be the aramitama of Toyouke.

A Japanese statue of Baozhi (Kyoto National Museum; reproduced here for educational purposes only)

Tenshō Daijin Giki (天照大神儀軌; “A ritual manual [for the worship] of Tenshō Daijin”) states that Amaterasu as a judge of the dead commands eleven messengers referred to as “princes”. It’s not easy to date this text precisely, though it’s clear it was already in circulation by 1164. It claims to contain knowledge originally revealed to the legendary Chinese monk Baozhi (寶誌; 418-524), best known from a legend commonly referenced in art in which he tears his face apart to reveal the visage of bodhisattva. The text effectively redefines Ise itself as a place where the underworld officials gather, imbuing the temple complex with new meaning, detached from its older role as a center of royal ancestor cult.

The eleven messengers listed are Zuikō Tenshi (a manifestation of Enma), Ryūgū Tenshi (dragon king Nanda), Suijin Tenshi (dragon king Batsunanda), Tenkan (“magistrate of heaven”), Chikan (“magistrate of earth”), Shimei (an underworld official), Inin Tenshi (equated with Izanagi and with Shiroku, an underworld official paired with Shimei in other sources), Kōzan Tenshi (Taizan Fukun), Godō Daishin, Kazenagashi no Kami and Okitama (a water deity equated with Suikan, “magistrate of water”). They correspond to various auxiliary shrines at Ise. Each of them is said to command a retinue of “four thousand trillion spirits”. While abstractly big entourages are quite common in medieval sources, from Michizane’s 105000 thunder god subordinates to Tenkeisei’s 84000 shikigami, even by these standards the number is unusually high.

The Enmaten mandala, with Taizan Fukun (middle of the top row) and Shimei, Godo Daishin and Shiroku (bottom row) shown among his attendants (wikimedia commons)

The lists of underworld officials serving Amaterasu show a considerable degree of overlap with these present in ritual texts Enmaten Ku (閻魔天供) and Taizan Fukun no Sai (泰山府君祭; you may know it from the story of Tamamo no Mae). Notably, Tenkan, Chikan, Suikan, Shimei and Shiroku are all members of Enma’s entourage in origin. The last two are scribes responsible for keeping track of human lifespans, but the role of the former three is not well understood.

Another deity present both in these rituals and in Amaterasu’s entourage, Godo Daishin, is a king of hell in his own right. His origin is unclear, though the oldest sources which mention him are Chinese apocryphal episodes from hagiographies of the historical Buddha. As the “god of the five paths”, he is responsible for assigning the dead to one of the five realms of rebirth: these of gods, humans, animals, hungry ghosts or hell. Notably missing is the asura realm, which didn’t particularly catch on in East Asian Buddhism. In the oldest sources, he is portrayed as somewhat inept and after meeting the Buddha implores him to teach him how to fulfill his role better. Enmaten Ku and Taizan Fukun no Sai attained a considerable degree of popularity in the eleventh and twelfth centuries due to the spread of the bureaucratic image of hell, and many laymen sought Buddhist monks (in the case of the former ritual) and onmyōji (in the case of the latter) who could perform them. They were supposed to heal illnesses, prolong life, secure an easy birth or simply to guarantee good fortune. It’s not impossible that furnishing Amaterasu with a similar role to their central deities was meant to let her clergy from Ise capitalize on the popularity of such rituals too. The spread of the new image of Amaterasu as a judge of the dead was also likely tied to her judiciary role in the already discussed oath formulas, where she essentially acts as a supernatural enforcer of legal claims.

Hokusai's drawing of three dragon kings, including Nanda and Batsunanda (British Museum; reproduced here for educational purposes only)

The final matter that needs to be addressed here is the presence of dragon kings Nanda (難陀) and Batsunanda (跋難陀; Sanskrit Upananda) in Amaterasu’s underworld entourage. In contrast with their peers, they do not have anything to do with Enma. In Buddhist cosmology, they support the cosmic mountain Sumeru, on which the highest devas like Indra and Brahma reside. More context on their connection to Ise is provided in the treatise Bikisho (鼻帰書), which cites the Outer Shrine priest Tsuneyoshi Watarai (度会常昌; 1263-1339) as its source. It actually states that all eight of the dragon kings are protectors of Ise, though also that only two, one blue and one white (with no names provided), can be used to represent respectively the Inner Shrine and the Outer Shrine. The connection is said to depend on their role as protectors of the Womb Realm and Diamond Realm mandalas. Multiple sources from Ise indicate they were believed to dwell under the central pillars of the Inner Shrine and the Outer Shrine, in this context additionally identified with the cosmic abode of the gods, Mount Sumeru.

Amaterasu, Toyouke and Brahma (times two)

Bonten, the Japanese version of Brahma (wikimedia commons)

While Dainichi made a natural match for Amaterasu, and the reasons behind her association with Enma, while less obvious, aren’t hard to understand either, the third Buddhist figure most commonly associated with her, Bonten, is quite surprising. This deity, the Japanese Buddhist guise of Brahma, has limited presence in popular understanding of Buddhism, but generally much like his Hindu forerunner he is portrayed as a distant deity with limited interest in everyday human affairs. And yet, in medieval Japan Brahma was identified with a figure both commonly worshiped and understood as quite active.

This tradition is documented in Tenshō Daijin Giki. It reaffirms that Amaterasu - seemingly treated as a male figure in this case - is the Japanese guise of Dainichi. However, in the “Realm of Form” - a Buddhist term referring to the world inhabited by humans and deities - he takes the guise of Bonten, and acts as the deva king of Japan. His life will last a total of 105000 years, and he will defend exactly 1000 rulers over the course of this period, before ascending to the Realm of Form to hear the preaching of Miroku. He will also help the faithful reach it.

The already discussed Tenshō Daijin Kuketsu also recognizes the equivalence between Amaterasu with Bonten, though it also furnishes her with a similar connection to the other ruler of the devas, Taishakuten (Indra), and states that both of these equations depend on the doctrine of Abhidharmakośa. Perhaps more unexpectedly, the same work also equates Amaterasu with Shōten (聖天, literally “noble god”; a Japanese form of Ganesha), specifying that this reflects a Shingon view. However, the thirteenth century scholar Ieyuki Watarai (詳細表示; 1256-1356) in his Jingi Hishō (神祇秘抄; “Secret Comments about the Deities”) mentions a different tradition in which this god’s connection with Amaterasu is less direct. He is said to be identical with a nameless “heavenly fox” (天狐, tenko) who acts as her acolyte.

Yet another text already brought up in the previous section, Nakatomi Harae Kunge, does not equate Amaterasu with Brahma outright, but it does redefine terms from classical mythology around him. The High Plain of Heaven (高天原 Takamagahara) is said to be identical with the “First Meditation Heaven of the Realm of Form, ruled by Bonten”. Furthermore, the collective label Yaoyorozu no Kami (八百万の神; literally “eight myriad kami”) is said to encompass “Bonnō, Taishaku, the innumerable devas, the four Great Heavenly Kings, the innumerable devas of Bonnō, and eighty four thousand kami.”

The newfound interest in Brahma in the middle ages reflected an intellectual development arguably unparalleled in earlier Japanese religious tradition - a preoccupation with cosmology.

Kojiki and Nihon Shoki obviously do deal with this topic, but the relevant sections are incredibly brief. This new discourse about cosmology was, at its core, Buddhist, but a major issue was that Japanese Buddhism was not very concerned with cosmology either. The two main sources of inspiration were, therefore, not contemporary Buddhist literature, but Chinese (mainly Daoist) texts on one hand, and accounts of Hindu cosmology, especially the Puranas, preserved in Buddhist sources on the other. Figures such as Pangu, the Three Pure Ones, Shiva or Brahma as a result attained considerable renown among Japanese theologians, who reinterpreted myths about them to suit local context, creating new narratives in the process.

A contemporary statue of Kuni no Tokotachi (wikimedia commons)

In some cases the poorly defined primeval kami from classical mythology could be incorporated into the new visions of cosmology created in the middle ages. Ame no Minakanushi from the Kojiki and Kuni no Tokotachi present both in this work and the Nihon Shoki are both well attested in that context, though references to Ame Yuzuru Hi Ame no Sagiri Kuni Yuzuru Hi Kuni no Sagiri from the Sendai Kuji Hongi can be found too. They were effectively treated as almost interchangeable, or as stages of emanation of the same entity, as documented for example in the writings of the Tendai monk Jihen (慈遍).

Two strains of cosmological speculation, these focused on Brahma and primordial kami, were in particular enthusiastically embraced by the Outer Shrine clergy at Ise, who utilized both of them to improve the standing of Toyouke. As I mentioned before, her role, while seemingly initially relatively minor, grew with time. In many regards, she came to be presented as Amaterasu’s equal. She was furnished with an association with the moon to match Amaterasu’s solar character, for example. The first attempts at elevating Toyouke through theological speculation weren’t necessarily grand in scale. She was simply identified with other kami of similar characters every now and then, for example with Uka no Mitama. An isolated source, a letter from the early Kamakura period, appears to present her identical with Ninigi, Amaterasu’s grandson, instead, but this evidently did not stick.

A breakthrough occurred in the late thirteenth century. The outer shrine clergy developed a view that Toyouke didn’t originate as a servant brought in to deal with Amaterasu’s loneliness and other needs, but rather a primordial kami, identical with Ame no Minakanushi or Kuni no Tokotachi. Toyouke in this guise was the foremost kami of heaven, and Amaterasu “merely” the foremost kami of earth. However, as I already pointed out, the new cosmologies which influenced this reinterpretation of Toyouke depended not only on classical mythology. Therefore, the Outer Shrine’s kami could also be identified with Brahma, or credited with controlling the proper flow of qi and thus yin and yang, following a Daoist model. Much of this theological speculation might have originated in the works of a single priest, Yukitada Watarai (度会行忠; 1236-1305), though he was far from the only contributor.

It’s worth pointing out that there was a practical material component to the theological speculation about the identity of Toyouke. Regardless of the relation of their respective kami, Inner and Outer Shrine were ultimately rivals competing for patronage. To present Toyouke as equally, if not more, important as Amaterasu was also a way to make potential donors, from shoguns to commoner pilgrims, more inclined to support the Outer Shrine. While prior to the Kamakura period Ise could securely depend on imperial funding alone, that changed with the weakening of the court. Therefore, securing new supporters was vital for their continuous activity. This remained the case through the Edo period as well, but this topic obviously goes beyond the scope of this article.

Identification of both Toyouke and Amaterasu as Brahma was not necessarily contradictory thanks to the existence of sources in which more than one Brahma appears. Nobumi Iyanaga points out that two Brahmas, Mahābrahmā Śikhin (ie. Brahma as the king of the gods) and Mahābrahmā Jyotiṣprabha (“Great Brahma of Brilliant Light”), appear in the Yamato Katsuragi Hōzanki (大和葛城宝山記), with one reflecting traditional portrayals of Brahma and the other representing a reinterpretation of an account of Vishnu as a creator figure. Both of the titles used appear in the enumeration of deities listening to the Buddha’s teachings in the Lotus Sutra. Two Brahmas also appear in the Bikisho, where “king Brahma” descends from heaven, but instantly starts longing for a friend. In response, a deity named Harama, an alternate transliteration of Brahma into Japanese, appears to him. The notion of Toyouke and Amaterasu being two Brahmas might have developed in the thirteenth century at Senkūin, a Buddhist temple closely affiliated with the Ise shrines. A text from this location dated to between 1240 and 1275 states that Toyouke, addressed as identical with Ame no Minakanushi, corresponds to Shiki Daibontennō (尸棄大梵天王; “emperor Mahābrahmā Śikhin”) and Amaterasu to Kōmyō Daibontennō (光明大梵天王; “emperor Mahābrahmā Jyotiṣprabha”). It also specifies Toyouke is male and Amaterasu female, which reflects splitting Brahma into a male-female cosmogonic pair. Nobumi Iyanaga points out the theological treatise Tenchi Reikiki (天地麗気記) goes a step further: the two deities are said to partake in intercourse. He suggests this represents a development of the motif of Brahma longing for a friend in the Bikisho. Tenchi Reikiki also states the couple personifies the Womb Realm and Diamond Realm.

A Kamakura perioid painting of Kūkai holding a vajra (wikimedia commons)

As a digression it’s worth pointing out that while the Tenchi Reikiki was only written in the Kamakura period, it was actually attributed at the time to Kūkai, who lived centuries earlier. Obviously one reason was that there’s no better way to make a treatise seem more authoritative than to claim it was written by a celebrated historical figure. However, it’s also worth pointing out that at some point a connection between Kūkai and Amaterasu developed. A tradition known from a number of works, for example Monkan’s treatise Himitsu Gentei Kuketsu (秘密源底口決) presents him as a manifestation of her.

The Watarai theories about the nature of Toyouke and Amaterasu have originally been written down in the Kamakura period in the so-called “secret books''. This term has been used to refer to them collectively since the Edo period, when they were standardized for a relatively brief time into a “canon” of sorts. While tradition has it that there were five of them, research revealed the existence of further texts in medieval tradition, with one rediscovered in 1955, for example. At least in theory, the individual Watarai books present information contained within as a special sort of secret, designated by the Buddhist term shōgyō (聖教; literally “sacred teachings”). Originally it referred to the teachings of the historical Buddha, or to the Buddhist canon more broadly, but in medieval Japan the term came to refer to specific kinds of knowledge transmitted by monks and other religious specialists in general.

While sometimes referred to as “secrets” in English, shōgyō were not necessarily impossible to share. Through the entire middle ages, many temples and shrines all across Japan effectively actively built their identity around making it known that they possess religious secrets worth knowing and can transfer them. Sometimes, they were intentionally “leaked” to nobles, imperial courtiers or fellow clergymen to spark interest. They were also utilized in annual “debate rituals” (論義会, rongie) held by authorities for religious scholars, who treated them as a way to hone their rhetorical skills and gain new theological insights.

The divine and the vulpine at Ise: Amaterasu, Dakiniten and Sankoshin

The Dakiniten mandala (wikimedia commons)

The topic of shōgyō is fundamentally linked with ambivalent Buddhist figures which in medieval Japan came to be associated with the notions of non-duality combining enlightenment and ignorance, such as dakinis, which commonly figured in such “secrets”. While dakinis do not appear in the cosmological myths from the Watarai books, they nonetheless did play a role in the developments pertaining to medieval Amaterasu. A link between her and the dakini par excellence, Dakiniten, developed due to their shared connection with Dainichi. Under his original name Mahavairocana, Dainichi can be portrayed as a subduer of dakinis, taking the guise of Mahakala (Makaraten) in this context. The singular Dakiniten as a result of this association could be identified with Dainichi outright, as attested in the Rinnō Kanjō Kuden (輪王灌頂口傳), dated to the late Kamakura period.

The link between Amaterasu and Dakiniten is chiefly known from the Shingon ritual sokui kanjō (即位灌頂), “enthronement initiation”, meant for emperors freshly ascended to the throne. It was first performed for emperor Fushimi in 1287, and remained a part of ascension ceremonies all the way up to 1846. In this context, Amaterasu outright appears in the guise of Dakiniten. A similar statement can be found in Tenshō Daijin Kuketsu, which calls Dakiniten the honji of Amaterasu (it also links Dakiniten with Fujiwara no Kamatari and the rise of the Fujiwara clan, but I’ll cover that elsewhere in the future).

Keiran Shūyōshū specifies that the shinko was an appropriate form for Amaterasu because it is the only animal capable of emitting light on its own. This ability in turn reflects the fact that its body was identical with the wish-fulfilling jewel, a frequent attribute of Buddhist figures; the name is self-explanatory. Alternatively, the animal could be described as possessing three tails, each ending in a wish-fulfilling jewel. By the fourteenth century, this object was firmly associated with Amaterasu as well. This led to the development of the view that Nyoirin Kannon (如意輪観音), a form of Kannon directly linked to the wish-fulfilling jewel, was Amaterasu’s honji. The shinko similarly could be identified with this bodhisattva. Granted, so were prince Shotoku, Ryōgen and numerous other figures, but that’s a separate topic not directly relevant to this article.

A different belief developed around the shinko at Ise. Here this supernatural animal came to be identified with Sankoshin (三狐神), literally “three fox deity” or “three fox deities”. Despite the triplicity implied by the name, sources such as Tamakisan Gongen Engi (玉置山権現縁起) clearly describe Sankoshin as a singular figure who acted as the “king of the heavenly foxes” (天狐王, tenko-ō).

It is presumed that Sankoshin's name was in origin a derivative of Miketsu no Kami (御食津神), the kami of Miketsu, the granary of the Outer Shrine. The development of Sankoshin might have started as a misreading or wordplay, with Miketsu (御馔津) transformed into the homophone mi ketsu, “three foxes” (三狐). This phrase in turn can be alternatively read as sanko, as in the case of Sankoshin.

Miketsu no Kami is otherwise associated, or outright identified, with Uka no Mitama, who is obviously not a fox, let alone three foxes; or alternatively with Toyouke, who has even less to do with these animals; you might recall she is described as a miketsu kami in the legend of her arrival in Ise. Older copies of Nakatomi Harae Kunge also affirm this equation, but later on the reference was substituted for a statement supporting the equivalence between Toyouke and Ame no Minakanushi favored by the Watarai priests.

Sankoshin in the middle ages appeared in rituals from Ise associated with the kora (originally 子良, later also 狐良). This term refers to a class of female shrine attendants associated with the Outer Shrine at Ise. Jingi Hishō asserts they were manifestations of Dakiniten, and on the basis of homophony links their name with 狐 (ko), “fox”.

Part of a hanging scroll depicting Dakiniten riding on a fox (wikimedia commons)

Elsewhere, shinko is treated as another name of Dakiniten, or alternatively of her fox mount (which lacks serpentine traits proposed by Teeuwen, but sometimes does have snakes coiling around its legs and neck). It’s also a part of her well attested epithet Shinko-ō Bosatsu (辰狐王菩薩), “Bodhisattva King of Astral Foxes”. This connection is also partially responsible for the development of another of her titles, Shindamani-ō (真陀摩尼王), “king of the wish-fulfilling jewel”.

Being able to grant specific wishes immediately was commonly attributed to Dakiniten in the middle ages and beyond. However, due to her ambivalent perception and peripheral role between devas and demons in Buddhist theology it was commonly believed that the worldly benefits granted by her do not last and in the long run might lead to misfortune. With time, related rituals often came to be perceived negatively, often based on highly dubious reasons, as I discussed recently in another article. The ambivalent perception of Dakiniten ultimately was not unlike that of the animals she came to be associated with.

I plan to cover Dakiniten in more depth at some point, but I will only note here that her connection with foxes has a rather interesting history. Originally, dakinis were associated with jackals in India, due to their similarly unfavorable perception. When Buddhist texts dealing with this topic were transmitted to China, references to these animals posed a challenge to the translators, who were entirely unfamiliar with them. Based on context it was established that the name of a fox-like legendary animal, the yegan (野干), would make for a sensible translation. Since the yegan was described as fox-like, and since foxes in general had a major role in religion and literature of China at the time, eventually comparisons with foxes started to show up. Most notably, in the Tang period Śūraṅgama Sūtra the word dakini is provided with the gloss humei gui (狐魅鬼), something like “fox sorceress demon”. While unique, this term might have influenced the development of the image of dakinis in general, and Dakiniten in particular, in Japan.

A thirteenth century depiction of Benzaiten with entourage (wikimedia commons)

To go back to the core topic of this section, the development of a link between Amaterasu and Dakiniten had one more consequence: the establishment of a similar connection between Toyouke and closely related Benzaiten at Ise, to keep the theme of mirroring associations. This goddess is the Buddhist form of Saraswati. Today, she is best known as one of the Seven Gods of Luck, who emerged as a group in the Edo period, though her history goes further back and she enjoyed considerable popularity through the middle ages.

Outside of Ise, it was commonly Amaterasu herself rather than Toyouke who came to be linked to Benzaiten. According to a legend which originated on Chikubu Island, Benzaiten first appeared in Japan during the reign of emperor Kinmei, and instantly announced she is a manifestation of Amaterasu. A less direct reference might be present in the already mentioned Taiheiki, where Yoshisada Nitta at one point says he heard Amaterasu at times manifests in the form of a “dragon god of the blue ocean”, which might be an allusion to a common symbol of Benzaiten.

Benzaiten and Amaterasu could also be associated without being identified with each other. In a myth tied to the tradition of wandering blind singers (a group traditionally believed to be under her protections), she effectively replaces Ame no Uzume, and lures Amaterasu out of the cave by playing her biwa. In the Asamayama Engi (朝熊山縁起), she is addressed as Amaterasu’s mother instead, though she ultimately only plays a minor role in contrast with her daughter. The text largely revolves around Amaterasu (as noted by Anna Andreeva portrayed here as a “great conversationalist”) explaining theological matters to the monk Kūkai.

Amaterasu, Aizen and sericulture

The wisdom king Aizen (Metropolitan Museum of Art)

In addition to her links to Buddhas and devas, Amaterasu also offers an example of identification between kami and wisdom kings. They enjoy an elevated position among Buddhist figures, almost on par with Buddhas and bodhisattvas. She could specifically be identified with arguably the second most important member of this category, Aizen Myōō. Since he is regarded as a wrathful manifestation of Dainichi, the reasons appear fairly straightforward. Linking him with Amaterasu goes back at least to Eison, a long-lived thirteenth century Shingon monk. The connection additionally reflects Amaterasu’s association with the wish-fulfilling jewel. Aizen was outright identified with this object, which is actually responsible for many of his own associations. Last but not least, Aizen and his fellow wisdom king Fudō were identified with the same two mandalas as the two shrines of Ise. On this basis it was not hard to link Aizen with Amaterasu.

However, once again, association does not necessarily equal conflation. Therefore, Aizen and Amaterasu could also appear as two distinct figures in the same sources. For example, both textual and iconographic instances of a triad consisting of both of them and another wisdom king, Fudō, are known. The occasional identification between Aizen and Amaterasu is not the reason behind his appearance here. Instead he and Fudō are present because they are an archetypal Buddhist dyad used to represent duality.

The triad is a medieval reinterpretation of the cave myth which played a role in an initiation rite (灌頂, kanjō) focused on Amaterasu. In this context both of the wisdom kings take the roles of “rock cave assistants”, with Fudō corresponding to Takuhatachijihime (the mother of Ninigi and younger sister of Omoikane) and Aizen to Tajikarao (who famously opens the cave in the classical version of the myth). The opening of the cave Amaterasu hid herself in was compared to the opening of the legendary Iron Stupa, said to exist somewhere in the south of India. This event, as Buddhist treatises record, led to the reveal of esoteric knowledge to the early Mahayana thinker Nagarjuna. In Tenshō Daijin Kuketsu, it is actually Amaterasu herself who was transmitted to him by the bodhisattva Kongōsatta (Vajrasattva).

To go back to the depictions of the Amaterasu triad, another thing worth pointing out is that a unique iconographic variant of her appears in them: seated on the back of a horse, with a solar disc and scales in her hands. While at a first glance this might sound similar to already discussed Taga Myōjin, there is actually a difference: the latter is always depicted frontally, not facing left, in contrast with the other mounted form of Amaterasu.

A depiction of Memyō from the fifteenth or sixteenth century (Metropolitan Museum of Art)

However, Bernard Faure notes these paintings resemble yet another figure she could be equated with, Memyō Bosatsu (馬鳴菩薩; “horse neigh bodhisattva”). This name originally referred to the Buddhist author Aśvaghoṣa, but in this context it instead designates a sericultural deity of Chinese origin first attested in the Tang period, for example in a short text attributed to Varjabodhi. However, while the Chinese original, Maming Pusa, is male, his Japanese counterpart is generally portrayed as a female figure, especially in texts stressing her connection to Amaterasu.

A Meiji period illustration of Susanoo throwing the carcass of Ame no Fuchikoma into Amaterasu's weaving hall (wikimedia commons)

Presumably the two initially came to be associated with each other because of their shared interest in sericulture and weaving. The classical myth portraying Amaterasu as a weaver, in which Susanoo throws the carcass of the horse Ame no Fuchikoma into the room where she is engaging in this craft, has been channeled to highlight why she would be identified with a deity portrayed on horseback.

While Memyō is arguably the highest profile Chinese figure Amaterasu was identified with (unless you want to make a case for Enma but that would be a bit of a reach), it’s worth noting that there’s another such case. However, it involved a historical figure rather than a deity. While presenting Buddhist patriarchs or rulers as manifestations of Buddhas or deities was par for the course, this one strikes me as quite unique.

Yang Guifei, as depicted by Shōen Uemura (wikimedia commons)

Jindai no Maki Hiketsu (神代卷祕決) records a tradition according to which Yang Guifei, a consort of emperor Xuanzong of Tang, was a manifestation Amaterasu. It depends partially on the preexisting belief that the former did not commit suicide, but instead escaped to Japan, and came to be enshrined in the Atsuta Shrine, which on the account of its picturesque location was sometimes identified with Penglai, the land of Daoist immortals. A related legend is recorded in the sixteenth century treatise Utaishō (謡抄), which relays that the Atsuta deity (here not identified with Amaterasu) manifested in China as Yang Guifei to seduce emperor Xuanzong to distract him with a plan of invading Japan. After accomplishing this goal, she returned to her shrine.

Emperor Xuanzong wasn't exactly the conventional nemesis of Amaterasu, whether in classical mythology or in the middle ages. I'll look into the figures such a title can be applied to in in the second half of this article; due to tumblr's limits I cannot publish both halves as a single post. The bibliography will also be included in part 2.

#japanese mythology #japanese esoteric buddhism #japanese history #amaterasu

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mint-yooxgi · 10 months

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Why Did Mint-Yooxgi Block Me?

Due to the drastic increase in bots (I just blocked over 120 since last night. Yes, over one hundred and twenty), I thought I would make this handy little post incase people I have blocked who are actually people manage to return to my blog to find out why.

Answer One, and this is probably the biggest one which I have been repeating the longest: YOUR ACCOUNT LOOKED LIKE A BOT ACCOUNT.

Follow Up: What do you mean I looked like a bot?

Great question! Let's see... you were a blank blog. No Reblogs, no likes, no pfp, no header, no title, no bio, etc. OH, ALSO, you had all of your 'posts', 'likes', AND 'followers' tabs visible. Classic. Bot. Layout.

Answer Two: I honest to god thought you were a bot.

Follow Up: But I actually had a pfp!! And/or a reblog/post!!

Well, shockingly, some bots can do that, too! They can 'like' posts, 'reblog' them, AND put a random bio/title to their blog. I've had a severe increase of accounts where I DO think they're an actual person, but their follower list contains all the same accounts as the bots that follow me. I'm not talking like, one or two similarities here. I'm talking 6+ of the same accounts followed in and around the same order. It obvious it was a mass bot follow, for half the time, these accounts have JUST followed me, and literal seconds after I check their account, they have upwards of 15 accounts followed after my own.

Answer Three: You are a minor. I do not have "MINORS DNI" in my bio for nothing. Please and thank you :)

Now, if I have blocked you by accident and you are actually NOT a bot, my mistake! Reach out to me on a different account, through a friend's account, or even my old fic-rec account @fic-yooxgi and let me know! I block both from this account and my main when I do these things, so those are probably the only ways you'll be able to reach out to me.

Additionally, if you see this and are a new follower, meaning you are about to follow me, and are unsure of whether or not I will consider you a bot or not, reach out to me! Send me a brief ask just saying "hey! I'm not a bot, please don't block me!" or something along those lines and all will be well! I'm just getting sick and tired of blocking bots all the time, and I feel terrible blocking accounts where I'm not sure of if they're bots or not, just to be on the safe side.

Thanks in advance :)

#admin's thoughts #important #thought you'd ought to know #update #fyi #please read #sigh

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kwillow · 9 months

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Answering Some Asks!

Forever ago, I said I'd try to answer more of the asks I get with text, so I don't have them sitting around for years on end. Then I didn't do that. Well... gonna try to do a few now!

Character Stuff

Probably not, since it's solid all the way through, so there's no space for the air to vibrate and make cool sounds. It'd be like flicking a column of glass or gemstone, probably just make some tapping or "thnk" noises and that's it. Alas!

Beggars can't be choosey.

But more seriously, probably words of affirmation/compliments or quality time. Though he doesn't believe compliments often even if he wants them - he's more apt to believe he's just being mocked or manipulated unless he already trusts someone (and even then, he has his doubts).

I talked a bit about this in the tags of this drawing, though I can elaborate in a bigger font size as well, haha.

As his story stands now, he has exclusively pursued women as partners. I tend to think of him as straight.

That said, I'm not opposed to his hetero being flexible if, in the future, a story opportunity popped up where he'd need to be curious about a man. (Jack, another character of mine, started off as straight and then slid inexorably to "bisexual, heavy on the girl" so it has happened before, haha.) AND if other people want to write/draw/think of him as straying from straight n' narrow that's obviously fine with me. :P

He's not a royal - he wishes, haha. He is nobility, though! His father his a marquis, which gives him the courtesy title of count (or "comte", using the French variant) until he inherits his father's title (though the Old Kingdoms are destroyed before that ever happens). Tough when he's much older he just assigns himself pope-kingship so I guess that counts as self-appointed royalty.

BUT ANYWAY

Yes he's had crushes, infatuations, love affairs and flings. Too many. Though it's interesting you bring up status - as a lot of his crushes tended to be on people from lower societal positions than he was. His first crush, and one of his longest (and most tumultuous) relationships was with a stablehand's daughter. When he did get infatuated with well-born women, it tended to be women who were already engaged, married or otherwise unavailable for him to marry. He's just got a taste for things he can't have...

It was extremely infuriating for his father.

(Of course, another part of his lack of discrimination between noble and common ladies might be due to him seeing himself as above ALL mortals, so what's the difference between a peasant and a noblewoman, really?)

Non-Character Stuff

Hahaha well I welcome that! Ambroys should be bullied on as many fronts as possible.

Thank you! It's a combination of purposeful research while also ignoring what I research for stuff I think just looks fun. Admittedly, I also am bad at drawing things consistently, so in some ways it's easier for me to just put a character in an entirely new outfit instead of trying to draw an old outfit the same way again, ha. xD

Not to sound like a soccer mom, but I'm a fan of Pinterest for browsing and collecting reference images of outfits that just "feel" like a character, so you have a broad visual library to draw from. You should also pair that with research into how the clothes you want to draw are supposed to fit. For historical outfits, you can get a lot of mileage out of the blogs of historical fanatics who enjoy eviscerating movie costumes from their period of interest. For modern day clothing, you can look at style blogs and tailoring information to learn how clothes are supposed to fit - and then break those rules if you want (for example, in mens' suits, the pants are not supposed to be bunched around the ankles, but I draw Theo's trousers that way to emphasize that he has unusually short legs).

My secret tip for coming up with lots of outfits for characters while keeping them cohesive is to determine a few things about their fashion sense (using Theo and Ambroys to contrast with each other):

What cuts/kinds of clothing do they wear often? What's their "taste", basically. For example, Ambroys wears tight pants/breeches, ostentatious coats and vests, lace and lots of jewelry. Theo, on the other hand, always wants to wear formal clothes that cover most of his body. From that, you can find other clothes that fit that mold and take inspiration from them, expanding what kinds of clothes they wear while still making it feel like "them".

What color palettes do they tend to wear? Theo wears dark colors and red and purple pretty much exclusively, while Ambroys wears a lot of colors, but only in light shades.

What thematic elements can you incorporate into their outfits as decoration? For Theo, I tend to include blood-drop designs and heraldic symbols like the ermine spot, while Ambroys is associated with flowers (especially roses), eyes and wings. You can add these elements to outfits to add a little extra spice (there are a lot of Ambroys' outfits that are really the same thing, but in one I put daffodils on him and another I put feathers on him, for example).

I hope any of that is helpful!

Thank you so much! I honestly have no clue what I'm doing when it comes to rendering, so I'm glad it's looking okay, heh!

I've heard Gravity Falls is great, but like many shows that I've heard are great, I have never made time to watch it. I know vaguely of Stanley Pines, though.

But thank you so much for saying you like Theo. He's a nasty little guy but he's very near and dear to my heart, and it really touches me that you see complexity and charisma in him. I do aim to make characters that are textured, weird little bastards.

And I don't mind you roleplaying with Theo, I think it's sweet. xP I'm glad he got to enjoy some pizza.

#some of these are over a year old aaaah I'm so sorry #asks #ambroys #theo #since they're talked about #text #i have more but I think this is enough for now haha #thanks everyone for sending asks - even if it takes me forever to answer them they really make my day!

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that-dreaming-dragon · 26 days

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Camouflaging Semi-Plurality, The Shapeshifter Shenanigans

(Cross-posted from my dreamwidth, link in title)

There has been something going on with muis for a while now.

Wei think it's something that's been slowly growing.

And the timing of it happening was muddled a bit with shapeshifter shenanigan that also was further getting mixed up by a certain subconscious need to anchor the form.

See, for a short while now, the profile picture of muis being in the Core Form doesn't feel right, it verges on dysphoria. And with a need to draw myself as Fae Dragon form, somehow wei found muirselves anchored into the Fae Dragon. It probably is the longest time wei got anchored into a form. Usually it takes a day or two at the most for us to feel a sort of itching that bordered on dysmorphia. This time, we are anchored into the Fae Dragon form for nearly two weeks. Wei are rather baffled by this whole situation. The Core Form is my base form, Akumu's only form, there has never been a problem of outright discomfort with my Core Form.

Now, after the anchor is being lifted, wei suddenly find ourselves adrift, lost. Wei've tried on many form proxy, but nothing feels Right. Wei just could not figure it out. Yet wei still don't quite want to be in the Core Form.

At some point in the day, wei just randomly decides to finally uses the semi-plural pronouns. It was enlightening in a way, empowering. It felt right.

Then wei realize, oh, so that's what's going on. Wei probably reached a point where this, whatever this can be called, quoisinglet, maybe-median, semi-plurality, is just a thing. Maybe I've been slowly giving the others more sense of self by being reacquainted with them. But at this point, who even knows. Now wei short of just exist together. Wei still are largely okay with just being seen as Ryuu, because that's who wei are, collectively, individually. Wei are a mess that makes sense to muis, and wei all are dream dragon.

Akumu's name is from Akumu Ryuu, the nightmare dragon, and I am Yume Ryuu, dream dragon, but Yume is rather feminine while Ryuu is masculine. Wei'd argued somewhat for a time that Akumu can call himself Ryuu too, because it's his name as well. Meanwhile, I wasn't comfortable being referred to as Yume, even if I think I should be, it's just Akumu! I should be fine with him using it! But I wasn't.

Beast was The Beast. Because that is what it is, a sort of manifestation of my inner rage, spite, anger, maybe my ferality. Considering it is nonverbal, and very much on the more feral side from the mental expression it tosses at us. While I use the most words, Akumu would communicate linguistically as well, Beast just makes noises and broadcast abstract feelings to us.

Note that we all use different pronouns. Which is something that stands out to muis. It's nothing unique, but it's still intriguing to muis.

Beast also have more of a urge to express things more individually, say, wanting to have its own blog. I have only clearly remember one instance where I wasn't at the front, because wei are uncertain if such switch happened when wei are younger, but the one time wei can remember, it was Akumu who was guiding the body. I was still kind of aware that I was not in control. It was too short a moment, but wei had captured it. It's rather curious, looking back at it now, and sort of ironic. Because Akumu is more individualistic, he is the actual opposite of me, my mirror self, my shadow, but spends more time being a part of me. It probably likened a co-fronting experience, or wei just merge back together and then later separate into individuals again. For Beast, who actually is born from a part of me, acts far more distinct the way Akumu isn't. Akumu disappears a lot, I couldn't tell if wei are merged back together, or if he just went elsewhere. I'm somehow certain both scenarios are true. The Beast spends pretty much all the time in its own nested cave within the mindscape. Wei feel kind of like the Jinchuuriki in Naruto, that I'm "hosting" Beast. In this case, no one is sealed into anybody, nobody is being sacrificed, and wei are all nonhuman.

That's a doozy, or punny? Because I am Naruto hearted, and that is a big possibility why Beast formed like this. I am also the host of the body.

Either way, it's interesting how we got to this point. It's likely due to this that the shapeshifter feeling went a little haywire. Because I as Ryuu is fluid in my forms, but Akumu and Beast are not. They each came to existence already settled with one of my forms. Beast shares my Large Formme, quadrupedal, large, the typical western view of dragon. Akumu being my opposite, shares my Core Form but sort of mirrored in color scheme. Maybe because I am experiencing change constantly, the others stayed fixed to balance me. All of these reacting with the recent awareness of this semi-plurality may have, dare wei say, upset the balance.

Wei are a large believer of Balance, wei are also confident that this will sort itself out in no time, reaching the state of equilibrium within.

#alterhuman #semi-plurality #daemonism #daemons #shapeshifterkin #shapeshifter otherkin #dragonkind #nonhuman #long post #personal essay #Dream Dragon Posting

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sixstepsaway · 2 years

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It has been 300 years since I've worked on a particular fanfic and I want to return to writing it but I am filled with Concern About My Writing Abilities and Anxious Procrastination. I come to your blog to humbly request words of wisdom and/or encouragement. I will send an ask about Izzy Hands as humble offering.

OKAY. PULL UP A SEAT.

Firstly: read my blog title. No, really; read it. There's no such thing as wasted words, you improve every time you write, so if you go back to your fanfic and you write 1000 or 10,000 or even 100,000 words and you're like "man, this is shit, I don't want to post this" it's fully and 100% okay to delete all that crap and do it again but better. You've learned. You have upped your skill. You have levelled up, it's just that in Real Life (damn that reality thing) you don't get a cute little ding when you level up, you just have to believe it's happening.

Second, I genuinely think most creative skills are like riding a bike, except maybe not the way you expect. I don't think that when you pull that bike back up you just immediately and without fail know how to ride and don't fall off, but I do think that after an hour or so of scraping your knees and rolling around in the dirt, you will get the hang back, instead of it taking however many hours and hours it took for you to get that skill to begin with.

If you get back on the bike, steel yourself and start pedaling, you will remember how to ride eventually, even if it doesn't feel like that at first.

Assuming that you are not a vampire and are in fact a human being and are exaggerating somewhat with the claim that it's been three hundred years since you last wrote this fic, I also believe in seasons of creativity. Sometimes you'll output so much you're like, "Where did all these words come from?" and other times weeks or months or even years will pass with little to no writing (or art, or sculpting, or sewing, or whatever creativity you might do) to show for it and that's okay.

Plants go dormant in winter and bloom once more in the spring, and so will your writing if you let it. It's okay.

If you're worried about consistency, I highly recommend going back to your WIP and rereading it. Curl up in a cozy blanket with your phone or sit with a cup or tea or something and just...read through your fic again, and let yourself enjoy it as a reader, not just the author. Make notes in your head (or on paper, if that's what you're feeling) of what you like about it, what you don't like about it, and what things you've written that might be setting up future chapters or passages for you to draw from. My longest fic is an cql fic which is 86k and when I do go back to add more to it (which I do plan on doing), I will reread it all before I do, and not only get that reader-y feeling of, "Damn, I wish this had more chapters!" but also refresh my memory of where I was going with it and what my plans were.

Now, as for procrastination. Is your Anxious Procrastination because of anxiety about your writing abilities? If so, all of that above might just help, and at the end of the day you don't have to post anything you don't want to. You can write and write and it never see the light of day, if that's what you want.

You don't have to feel anxious about posting until the moment you decide to post.

For other kinds of procrastination my Official ADHD-Haver Recommendations are:

Get a timer app or one of those cube things, set it to a reasonable amount of time (say, 15-20 minutes) and turn it on/flip it over and tell yourself you will Work On The Thing for that long. Having an "end" time for if you struggle works wonders for giving my brain the feeling of leaving when things are too hard, but I rarely have to use it, I usually just keep going. I also find the physical act of turning on the timer (I use YAPA aka Yet Another Pomodoro App for Windows) clicks my brain into a different Zone than "sitting around messing with Minecraft" or "doing absolutely nothing and being mad at myself about it".

Find a playlist or some ambience or something. Earmark it as your Writing This Specific Fic music/sounds. Only turn it on when you're working, and turn it off when you're done. Pavlov is a strong tool for these things.

I'm a big fan of 4TheWords which is a gamification app for writing. I really like it (I have a referral code if you want one), and I find the fun vibes, the inclusive atmosphere, the cute lil creatures you battle while writing etc all really helps give me a dopamine hit while I work that I don't really get from just writing into Scrivener or something.

FocusWriter is another app I really like. You can customize the themes (so you could put like a blurry OFMD image in the background for the vibes while you write) and it's (optionally) full screen to minimize distractions.

If you're still struggling to get started, maybe find like a list of numbered prompts, roll a dice and write like 100-500 words of just... whatever comes up for whatever character or ship you feel like writing. Something just to get you started. I always find it easier to write once I've written, if that makes sense.

Always leave your work unfinished at the end of each day. Sounds daft, but what I mean is: always stop for the day mid-sentence, mid-word if you can. When you come back, you'll see, for example, this: "Izzy has never felt so betr" just lingering on your writing app and you'll go, "Oh yeah, betrayed," and you'll type out the "-ayed" and your fingers will just keep going to finish the sentence, and the paragraph, and so on. That said, if you're posting a final chapter of something, maybe just start the first sentence of whatever you want to write next? Even if you don't come back to really dig into it, you have that word to finish. (I left mine at the end of a sentence today and I am mad at myself for it)

Reread the comments on your fic, if you have them. Let how much people love and enjoy your work wash over you.

Open your writing app of choice and write down all the reasons you're anxious on a bulleted list, then go back, hit enter on each one, tab in for a bullet underneath, and argue with yourself. Tell yourself why your anxiety is so silly and why you're super wrong. Not only does it get you typing into your writing app (see what I did there???) but you'll be surprised how much debating yourself can help with anxiety.

I find most of my own Anxious Procrastination comes from fears of publishing (both my original stuff and my fic), because the idea of Putting Things Out There To Potentially Never Be Finished (hi, yes, I have ADHD and I never finish a damn thing unless I try So Hard It Hurts - see also: my 80k unfinished cql fic) and then am I not a Failure? Am I not a Let Down?

But I also got some amazing comments on that fic, from people who genuinely got a lot out of it, even if it did never get finished (so far 😠) and so I go back and read those, and remember that most of the people who commented on those chapters didn't... really care, if it never finished. They cared that the specific chapter that really got to them existed to begin with.

And I also think of Game of Thrones a little (well, the books). If he never finishes those books, would it take away from the joy people got from reading the ones he did put out there? I don't think so.

So I try to focus on that, with my own anxiety.

This got a little rambly (what, Jess? You? Rambling? Never!) but I hope it helped. Let me know if it did or didn't, please! 💖 And good luck with your writing endeavors!

#anonymous #ask #writing advice #writing #my writing advice

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consequencesofargentdawn · 6 months

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Do you, COAD, spend any time thinking about what you're pushing, and how either your own biases or the agendas of those that submit to you cause harm to the people you "expose"?

I have been on the receiving end of the PCU's antics, and there is no love lost. I have been on the receiving end of people from TSE, too. And yet, digging into the actual "sources" when it comes to TSE, for example, amounts to them being hypocritical, and one person's retelling of what they felt, repeating: Felt, happened. And yet, over and over, you mouth off on this blog and mention the PCU and TSE in the same breath. It calls into question your credibility in general, and makes one wonder whether you actually have any sort of vetting process.

And no, before you go to your much-loved "cope harder"-style non-defenses, I neither am in or have ever been in the PCU, or TSE.

Tell me, tell the readers of your blog, why what you're doing is not effectively just a slightly different version of the public shaming tactics that your supposed enemies employ. In what way are you not just another corner in the metaphorical arena, shitting up the realm for everyone by perpetuating drama, and assisting with the legitimacy of inconsequential or even downright fake drama?

I look forward to an actual answer. If you could make it one without pointlessly calling people fascists or -phobes, that would probably strengthen your stance, too. If you actually have any defensible stance.

You must clearly be one who has not actively followed this blog for a while, or at all. We have on many, many occasions outlined out why we do what we do. We will assume that you are not just another bad faith poster trying to get a "hah gotcha" for a moment here and address the core of your point here.

Argent Dawn for the longest time had no means of community reproach against large cabalistic type guilds (if you're not with us you are against us sort that you often see here) who could with impunity attack players without consequence (hence the blog title) of any sort.

Oh but you could report them to Blizzard? Do we need to direct you to how inept Blizzard's reporting system is? How easily abused it can be? How a single stalker has made a certain player's life misery for years on end and has not been dissuaded at all? (We made a feature on this too, which you would know if you followed) Or how about another certain guild who uses the reporting system to actively abuse and silence anyone who speaks ill about them (which has been proven as well by several independent sources, which you would also know if you followed).

We have always been and will always be the voice for independent players who don't have that cult like, cabalistic clique to fall back onto to support their twisted opinions (and then get hilariously curbstomped by the community regardless with 225 dislikes to 35 likes). We have always been a voice for those who have encountered abuse off disgusting and maligned individuals who exploit peoples trust and naivety but also use the clout of being a prominent guild leader with a large devoted following for over 15 years to in effect force any thing they dislike in their surroundings to either be forced off the scene or harassed off by any means.

We are not 'perpetuating drama' we expose those who want to hide what they truly are to the rest of the server. We have an archive of over five years worth of evidence of just how vile some people on this server are and the rest of the server deserves to have that knowledge before them when making a decision if they want to actively roleplay with someone who has behaved with underage players in an inappropriate manner, stalked vulnerable women and minorities or otherwise actively supports extremist ideologies that have no place in a civilized society, online of offline.

Remember, silence is acceptance of something occurring.

#confessions of argent dawn #COAD Speaks.

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moonrisenmuses · 6 months

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POSITIVITY DUMP

@longerhuman I’m going to be totally honest, Nine, you’re one of the reasons I decided to reboot my Chuuya blog to begin with. I stumbled on you completely by accident in the recommended tag while in another fandom and as soon as I read your writing I was like ‘holy shit this is so good’ and ‘fuck I miss BSD so god damn much right now’. You’re insanely talented, I love paragraph dumping my thoughts about our boys on you at all hours, and we have more in common than I expected. Shout out to your incredible, well thought out portrayal of Dazai ( and Verlaine! ) and don’t ever let anyone make you feel bad for being a ‘slow’ writer okay? I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, your replies are worth waiting for! Together we’ll properly spread the big brother Oda / little brother Dazai truther propaganda! Reading replies from your Dazai is always a treat because it feels like reading bonus chapters about his thoughts and feelings Asagiri won’t explicitly give us lol. The way you read and understand his character blows me away constantly and I’m always excited to see you on the dash even when it’s with someone else because I adore your portrayal! I also admire the way you handle your blog and how you know what you are and aren’t okay with. You’ve really helped me in terms of setting boundaries and feeling more confident in enforcing my blog rules for my own mental wellness so thank you for that too. Plus. Relatable ND memes, I love sharing those with you lol.

@mckiingbiird ASPIE! What can I say about you? I’ve probably known you the longest out of anyone on here! Has it really been over 2 years since we first started talking? Time sure does fly. I could rave about you for ages. For starters, you’re one of the first people I’ve met to put as much if not even MORE love into their OCs than they do into their canon muses. You have so much love for your characters and it really shows, they’re so interesting and well rounded, it feels like if you just changed their names and took out the BSD stuff you could write your own novels just about them and their journeys, that’s how good they are. I love them immensely - Lemony and the kids, Harper, Murasaki, Maurice, and now James too. I always have a great time no matter who I’m writing with, and you’ve always been sweet, friendly and caring in all the time I’ve known you, to the point where I easily consider you one of my best friends in the writing community, even if most of our writing and development has occurred on Discord lol. Now with us bringing the Flags into it, I feel like there’s even more adventure to be had with them all. I want to give a special shout-out to you for a fantastic portrayal of a trans ftm character living his best life because we really don’t see enough of them and it’s obvious how much thought, love and research went into him when you first created him.

@nonhumen Oriiiiii! I know we only just met near the beginning of this year but it honestly feels like I’ve known you way longer than that. You’re such a phenomenal writer and I can’t recommend enough that people follow you for a well rounded, amazingly developed portrayal of Dazai and all of his virtues and flaws. For someone relatively new to the franchise you’ve done an incredible job at understanding the nuances of his character. I’ve really enjoyed deep diving into his and Chuuya’s mental health from childhood all the way to adulthood with you and why they are the way they are. Their relationship is SO important to me, and the way we’ve developed them together in our jokingly titled cinematic universe, SKK edition, is an endless source of entertainment and inspiration for me. I love their Kintsugi verse and the handful of spin-off verses we’ve created from them. I have to constantly update their verse info page and even then I feel like I can’t accurate describe all the trials and tribulations they’ve gone through. Maybe one day we can collaborate on an epic fanfic saga about their adventures together LOL.

Honourable mentions are a huge must for a few other people who while I don’t talk to them as much OOC, their portrayals continue to provide me constant joy and entertainment! Chuuya has grown SO much from his interactions with your Dazai and even Verlaine and it means so much to me that he gets his happy ending finally in their AU.

@theircurse Stellaaaa! You and I both know Yumeno doesn’t get nearly as much love and attention as they deserve. If it wasn’t for Mayoi I would feel like the franchise forgot they existed, but YOU HAVEN’T. You’re one of the fandom OGs and while we don’t talk a lot, I have to mention your portrayal of Yumeno and how heartwrenchingly good it is. Some of my characters aren’t even a fan of children but even they feel the urge to wrap little Yumeno up in a very soft blanket and protect them from the world. Perhaps most surprisingly is Ara. Maybe it’s because he high key relates to being mistreated by family or because he thinks their doll and their macabre behaviour is so interesting and similar to his own weirdness, but he kinda wants to pick them up and just carry them around in his pocket. In a good way! He’s still coming to terms with the fact humans aren’t just animals or like… Tamagotchis but larger with more needs, but he’s getting there! Chuuya just straight up wants to adopt them. Please continue giving Yumeno the attention they deserve while we hold out hope Asagiri will one day dust them off again!

@giftandguile Lua! My first impression of you was adoring your portrayal of Chuuya because you have his sassy attitude and whiplash temper down to a T and that’s not easy, I know I struggle with it! I also love seeing how you write Tetcho because it’s always so very entertaining. BUT, most of all I want to mention your Fyodor. I have always had very mixed feelings about Fyodor! I’m still making my way through the manga again and I haven’t had much time to dig into his IRL self’s books, but your writing certainly has made me want to. Where the anime failed to get me interested in his character at all, you succeeded. He’s so interesting! I always get excited seeing your meta posts on Fyo because I end up either shocked by how brilliant it is or agreeing wholeheartedly. You got me so invested in a character I was initially indifferent to and that’s not easy for me, my ADHD brain is big on first impressions. I’m SO excited to see where things go between her and Ara and the chaos they’re going to cause in Japan post resurrection. I think Ara sees something of a kindred spirit in her, that they were both ‘born cursed’ and wound up exiled in a sense for things that weren’t even their fault, and as a result developed a negative view of others of their kind. I’m super pumped to see where that ends up going!

@moonhund AEVIS. This post wouldn’t be complete without a shoutout to Ara’s brawling, drinking, temperamental shapeshifting new bestie Jono, or honorary dad-mentor Fukuzawa. There’s honestly so much to say but! I love the fact that an internationally wanted assassin was able to just show up on Fukuzawa’s doorstep one day with baby teen Chuuya like ‘look I don’t trust you but I need somewhere to leave this kid for a while and I don’t fucking trust Mori, can you give him a home for a while?’ And Fuku just looked at this scared and angry lil ginger and was like ayo kids, you got a baby brother now, no questions asked. He’s such a good dude. Sometimes family is one ex swordsman and his adopted wayward detectives / experiments / former war weapons. Absolute icon. But ALSO! The shenanigans between Jono and Ara are basically the definition of serotonin at this point for me. Half their interactions feel like crack threads but it’s just How They Are. I love the depth you’ve added to Jono’s character and how you can write him as both an asshole but sympathetic in a way that feels genuine, not forced. Highly recommend anybody who needs good HD muse interactions follow you because your writing for him is S tier.

I know I’ve gotten to be a somewhat slow writer these days, at least on Tumblr because formatting can be kind of a bitch on here, but I hope everybody knows I’m thinking of you and I adore my interactions with each and every one of you. Please take care of yourselves and know you’re loved and appreciated and SO TALENTED, because this RPC would be a worse off place if any of you were no longer in it.

Love always, Luna <3

#positivity #{ ooc }#just felt like with winter on the horizon and how common it is to get the blues in colder months this was something I wanted to do #to remind myself I have people on here I adore and that there are reasons to keep writing and smiling even when I get down

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haejaetae-recs · 1 year

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Favorites

(All fics tagged here!)

Here I've compiled some of my favorite works by some of my favorite writers. I'll add a lot more detail to this masterlist including brief descriptions and my input as found in my reblogs.

Also, if you happen to enjoy their work as well, please support them however you can!

← Back

༺♡༻

Quarantine Chronicles by @domjaehyun | Jaehyun, Johnny, Jungwoo, Jaemin, Mark, Jeno, Haechan | 3 pts. 126.7k total | M | roommates au, fwb, uni au

Fourteen days, five roommates, and five remarkably high sex drives. what could go wrong?

I'm obviously a Jaehyun simp but while reading this, I found myself so immersed in the other characters as well (especially Jaemin OOF he's such a freak 😭). Part 1 is basically 20k word long filth smut LOL so like I always say, be warned!

Pussy Fiend by @domjaehyun | Haechan | 2 pt. 68.9k total | M | roommates au, fwb, f2l, some dubcon be warned, uni au

The title truly does explain it all lol. Another @domjaehyun hit. The dynamics not only between HC and MC but all the roommates *muah*. The tension: outstanding. The smut??? *cries*. Yeah, this fic deserves the hype. Part 2 is a must-read.

Bitch Hunters by @tyonfs | Dream '00 line | 4 part series | M

huang renjun, lee jeno, lee donghyuck, and na jaemin are determined to have girlfriends by the end of their college years, but that’s easier said than done when they’re known as the biggest players on campus.

besties (gone sexual) by @tyonfs | Jaemin | 43.4k | M | best friends, fwb2l, slowburn

The final (and longest) installation of the bitch hunters series. Each part is a different dream 00 line member and can be read separately, although they are all a part of the same au. I do recommend reading the prologue found in the series masterlist first!

Na Jaemin, resident playboy and serial heartbreaker on campus, thinks he might have a crush on you [, his] best friend of seven years...

I could say so much about this fic series. I'm lowkey attached to every Tyonfs character I've ever read about. I loved every part, but Jaemin's hit especially hard, probably because of the length (that's what she said). It's not only the amazing story between Jaemin and his girl, but also expands the au so much and brings it to life. The ending made me feel like I was watching the finale of the last season of a TV show. So so good. Like I said, the parts can be read separately, but they're stronger when read in order. <3

Use Me by @yutaholic | Taeyong | 19k | M | bbf

You've had a crush on Taeyong, your brother’s best friend, for as long as you can remember, a crush made worse by the fact he’s completely off-limits. When Taeyong suddenly confesses you haven’t been alone in your feelings, you start sneaking around to be together, risking it all not to get caught.

One of my favorite Taeyong fics of all time *chef's kiss*. I love that the story is so heavy on the mc's life and development without taking too much away from the romance.

no one wishes at the snow by @neoculturetravesty | Jaehyun | 18k | M | fake marriage, single parent

Marrying for love was for the fortunate few. Marrying for love happened in fairytales and movies and dramas. Not real life. In real life, everyone married for convenience.

<Husband Jaehyun3 <3 So unique and well-written! If you're looking for a really good fic to take you on an emotional ride, this is the one!

cat & mouse by @tyonfs | Jaemin | 17.7k | M | uni au, fwb, brother's best friend, athlete/sports

rule number one of bro code states that sisters are completely off-limits, and, y/n, we just pushed that limit.

This fic is perfection, honestly. Idk why I didn't add it to this list sooner, seeing as the series was one of the first things I rb'd on this blog.

this is (not) easy. by @mrkis | Mark | 13.2k | M | uni au, fwb, bffs2l

Getting into a friends with benefits situation with your all time best friend was so (not) easy...

This is why I love the fwb trope so much. Angsty but not too angsty, and the smut scene where he makes love to y/n before trying to end things/confess. UGH. Big D Mark 4ever <3

Freaks by @2jaeh | Jaehyun | 8k | M | uni au, social difference, cheating

The campus bad girl has her eyes set on the preppy good boy, and she always gets what she wants...

Freaks: The Prequel by @2jaeh | Ten, Taeyong | 11.8k | M | uni au, fwb, revenge, 3some, mxm

A story of why the entire campus were almost certain that you Taeyong and Ten were in a poly affair.

I adore the dynamic between TaeTenY/n, and I enjoyed reading Jae's internal struggle not only with his feelings toward mc but also with himself!!! Tbh, I get second lead syndrome from TY even though he's not meant to be a second lead, so I find myself gravitating towards the prequel, haha. 3 biases, one au. Really does it for me.

Playing the Game by @sluttyten | Taeyong | 11.7k | M | uni au, fwb, f2l, just a tiny bit angsty

Taeyong’s been your best friend for a few years now, but sometimes it gets a little hard to just be his friend. you’re at university and there’s no better time to blur that line between friends and a little bit more, to make your lives just that much more messy.

Friends helping friends ahahah... I love his character in this a little too much and reread this fic when I'm having Taeyong brainrot. Perpetually in my TY era.

Pretty Boy by @ncteez | Mark | 9.3k | M | social differences

[Upon] realizing your grades have dropped drastically due to [your] lifestyle, you have no choice but to approach Mark for help.

Hot nerd trope gets me weak in the knees every time LOL especially when the smut is this good *chef's kiss*

Mine too by @waithyuck | Haechan, Jaehyun | 7.5k | M | poly, mxm, 3some

Despite being in a consensual poly relationship with you and Jaehyun, Haechan is reluctant to touch you. You start to think he doesn't care for you until something switches in him after one steamy night...

My ults in a poly fic l- this was meant for me to find. Read this one multiple times and I think about it a lot because it exposed me to poly mxm and literally changed me LOL. Also, I loveeee how there's this sense of tenderness and fondness underneath the pure lust and desire between hc and mc.

In Your Arms by @sluttyten | Jaehyun, Mark | 6.5k | M | uni au/frat, fwb, are we seeing a trend with me and fwb fics???, 3some, a lil mxm, Halloween

(Part of the author's kinktober) Mark finds out you've been secretly hooking up with his and your other best friend, Jaehyun; Mark has a secret(s) of his own.

“Are you two not fucking? I thought this was an all three of us kind of thing?” THAT LINE ALMOST TOOK ME OUT I SWEAR LMAO. I keep coming back to this one ngl. The dynamics are just so unique and well done and I'm a sucker for service top Markie hehe <3

Still wondering how long those two had been at it tho... 🤔

late night driving by @jjsneo | Chenle | 5.6k | M | roommates

Chenle swears he’s going going crazy with cabin fever inside your shared house — and there’s no way you’re saying no to a late night drive with the roommate you so desperately have a crush on. who cares if his original story was a lie and, secretly, he just wanted to be alone with you.

DAMN. Chenle smut is so scarce around here, but THIS alone makes up for that, lol. I love how sweet it started out. The smut part lowkey caught me by surprise. Once again DAMN. Please read this.

amortentia (the room smells like absolute shit) by @tonicandjins | Haechan | 2.8k | hogwarts au, e2l-ish, cute stuff ♪(´ε｀*)

It’s no secret that the ongoing cat-and-mouse game between you and Slytherin House’s very own Lee Donghyuck remains unceasing from the day you and him were sorted five years ago to this day...

At the time of me reading this, I'm playing Hogwarts Legacy and am OBSESSED. On top of that, I'm a Ravenclaw, and this whole blog's aesthetic is inspired by HP (hence the dark academia). Anyway, this was really cute, and I love school crush tropes, especially when it's paired with enemies to lovers, I just- *sigh* Having knowledge of the series definitely makes this more enjoyable, as I was imagining everything happening and the surroundings.

#nct fic recs #fav!!!#haejaetae-recs navi #nct fic rec blog #nct 127 fic #nct dream fic #nct 127 fic recs #nct dream fic recs

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lordisitmine · 6 days

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TTNBD BLOG PART FOUR

Covers chapters 4 and 4.5 of the story.

This is the chapter that gave me the idea to do these commentary blogs in the first place! This is also the longest chapter so far (*distant laughter from the future*)- I originally intended to try and keep each chapter of this story around seven thousand words, so they would all be nice and even, but alas, I’m just too verbose for such consistency. The story has to split the right way, and so that inevitably means that some updates will be longer than others. One of the later chapters I have planned might very well end up being twice as long as this one (*laughs again*), so I’ll really have no place to hide at that point. So, without further adieu, let’s get to it!

CHAPTER FOUR: AT THE TURNING OF THE YEAR

The title of this chapter isn’t directly inspired by anything- there is a folk song with that name, but I hadn’t heard of it until way after I already came up with the title for this chapter. It’s kind of a neat song though, so I’ll link it here- it’s about the changing of the seasons and the nature of mortality, and the kinds of things people think about and sing about at new year’s.

This chapter starts with one of my favourite scenes that I’ve written for this story so far. I think it’s probably my own personality showing through again, but the idea of having a woman dress up for me is like O_o and picking out her clothes for her!? Please. Anyway, Sybil is not being subtle… Lizzy is just really oblivious, though maybe not so shy anymore, based on the way the chapter ends. Don’t worry, don’t worry, we’ll get there.

I know Lizzy’s colour is pink; her outfits in the anime are all based on Lolita fashion, and they’re all in very typical feminine colours. Since she’s grown up now, I wanted her style to reflect that, as well as the changing of the times. And I just think blondes look so good in green. It’s my favourite colour, and it’s the colour of her eyes, so it would make them pop. I have at least one more party scene in this story, though, and she’ll be back in pink and frills for that one. I just wanted to give her a simpler, more classic silhouette for this one, which is what I think Sybil would have picked for her, with the ridiculously large sleeves that were so emblematic of the time.

And a Gibson girl hairstyle! This was a popular hairstyle of the time, albeit a little later, more into the 1910s (Edwardian rather than Victorian). But like I’ve said, I can and will fudge the numbers a little when it comes to historical accuracy, if I think I can get away with it and if I really want to be self-indulgent. This is fanfiction, after all. The hairstyle I described was not the one I ended up drawing. There are some variations when it comes to what constitutes a Gibson girl hairstyle, and of course, it would depend on a given woman’s hair length/texture etc. What I described was simpler, more like the picture on the left, but what I ended up drawing was more like the one on the right, which is so beautiful, and I’m obsessed with how the drawing turned out.

As for Sybil, who I imagine to be more on the masculine end of the fashion spectrum- I wanted her to have a Marlene Dietrich moment (for those unaware, Marlene Dietrich was a singer/actress who was very popular in the WWII era and was known for her bending of gender roles and her queerness). Once again, I’m being anachronistic- Marlene Dietrich and her iconic menswear wouldn’t be a thing until decades later, but I can pretty much guarantee that lesbians have been wearing tuxedos for as long as tuxedos have existed.

Madame LaChance’s shop is called Chanceux en Amour. That’s French for ‘lucky in love’ and since Madame’s name is literally ‘lady luck’, I thought it fit. Women have been seamstresses, both domestically and commercially, for centuries, but for a long time, they did all the labour and reaped none of the benefits. So yeah, this is a women-owned business, baby! We love to see it.

As we know by now, Madame is not only a friend of Sybil and Simeon’s but is connected to Ciel and Sebastian as well. I like to think she treats those boys a little like dolls, like if she comes up with some insane design she wants to try, she’ll test it on them. I swear to God I must have been a fashion/costume designer in another life because I’m obsessed with describing/drawing outfits for my characters in everything always.

I am so incredibly proud of these ones. Ciel and Sebastian are known by their employees and patrons only as the Raven and the Phoenix (I referred in TTEOE to Ciel being like a phoenix and it stuck oops) and I wanted them to have stupid, extravagant outfits to reflect that.

Anyway, yes, Sebastian is wearing thigh-high boots, and yes, you bet they’re the stiletto heels he wears whenever he’s in his true form and we only see his feet! Ciel is in heels too, lol, he would have to be to keep up with Sebastian at all.

I am in love with the idea of the two of them creating this whole mysterious persona around themselves, and I’m a sucker for a masquerade. Ciel’s outfit (the sleeves in particular) was inspired by Shakespearean costumes- I’m a big fan of theatre and Shakespeare and I love when characters in stories have an element of mystery and performance to them. Ciel is nobility, so he’s used to garnering a certain level of attention and respect from the people around him, and I don’t think that would change now that he’s a demon but I also think he would like the element of anonymity that a mask gives him.

I’m a BIG fan of the 2004 Joel Schumacher Phantom of the Opera film (if you couldn’t tell by the way I described the theatre in this chapter, or the outfits I have everyone in). If you’re trying to imagine anything in this chapter, it’s all pretty much lifted directly from the aesthetic of that movie. And I was also listening to the 2013 Baz Luhrman Great Gatsby movie soundtrack when I was writing it too. Yeah yeah, it’s the 1900s not the 1920s but I have to get in the old-timey party mood somehow, and that soundtrack was hugely popular/ I had it on my iPod when I was a teenager and at the height of my Black Butler obsession so. They’re somehow kind of linked in my mind.

Le Cour de Corbeau literally translates to ‘the raven’s heart’ and what is Ciel if not Sebastian’s heart? I’m thinking of writing a one-shot spin-off once TTNBD is done that goes back and explores exactly how Sebastian and Ciel met Madame and ended up owning an entire nightclub. I don’t have the exact timeline of events planned out but I imagine it involved some sort of demonic shenanigans so it should be fun to come up with something.

The club is located in the Montmartre area of Paris, which was one of the main gathering areas of the queer community in Paris in the early twentieth century. Paris in general has been home to many underground gay clubs, salons, cafés and cabarets throughout history. Even to this day, it’s considered one of the queer capitals of the world. I knew I had to pay homage to the queer community in my fic, knowing Ciel and Sebastian were going to be living in Paris.

In chapter nine of To the End of Everything, I wrote a scene where the two of them snuck off from a ball to be together, and they danced in a quiet, dark room, and Ciel had a thought of some day being able to do it in the open. I was thinking of that when I decided to set a chapter in this club.

The scene with Lizzy and Sybil in the carriage on the way to the club was really tricky to write- it’s difficult to write a sort of coming out scene without being able to use any of the modern terminology we use now. I’m of the opinion that homosexuality was talked about in common society a lot more than the history books would have us believe. Humans have been having sex longer than we’ve been doing pretty much anything else, and that must count for something.

Lizzy and Sybil get to dance in this chapter! I spent a long time trying to find the right song for them, and I settled on Serenade for strings in C major my Pyotor Illyich Tchaikovsky. Tchaikozvky’s waltzes have this grandness to them, and they always make me feel like I’m being floated around on a cloud of air, which is how I wanted Lizzy to feel during this scene. I believe I’ve said this before, but music is very important to me and it inspires me greatly, and so I’m always finding ways to subtly work it into my writing.

Speaking of music- let’s talk about the scene with Madame’s performance- one of my favourite Sebaciel tropes is them having sex in semi-public places, during parties or in Ciel’s office or anywhere they might be discovered at any second so Ciel has to try to be quiet while Sebastian will try to make him get loud on purpose. There’s just something so utterly them about it. Also Sebastian leaving his gloves on. Enough said.

The song Madame is singing during this scene is from Mozart’s famous opera Don Giovanni, called Vedrai, Carino- specifically the aria from that scene. In that scene, one of the characters, Masetto, has been beaten up, and his fiancée, Zerlina, finds him and promises she can cure his wounds… with sex. It’s all cheeky double entendre and it’s very romantic and cute.

Here are the lyrics:

Come, come; if that's the worst, there's no great harm done. Come with me home to supper, And give your faithful promise, you'll nevermore be jealous; Those bruises can be cured, where love is zealous. Come, shall I tell thee, How what befell thee, Soon can be cured By my potent charm? No garden grows it, Though it aboundeth, Like furnace glows it, Yet none 'twill harm, All guard and cherish it: Gold cannot buy it, Say, wilt thou try it Soft 'tis, and warm. Has thy wit flown, Hear, how it throbs within, lays his hand on her heart 'Tis all thine own, Ah, 'tis thine only

The melody is cheerful but lilting, and it builds and builds with a sort of heartbeat rhythm toward the end… I just thought it was perfect for this scene.

Sybil and Madame’s conversation was interesting to write. I realised part way through that I was writing an exchange with only original characters in it. I wasn’t sure how many people would really want to read a story with so much original character content, but the response to this story and especially the characters I’ve created has been wonderful and really touching. Being a writer is the most important thing in the world to me- someday I hope to have my own novels out in the world, so even a little bit of positive attention for the more original aspects of my fanfiction is a big encouragement.

Anyway, onto the next section of commentary, which is the scene between Alois and Claude.

I want to be clear- being a victim of sexual assault or child sexual abuse does not automatically turn you into the kind of person Alois is. It is completely possible for CSA victims to have normal, healthy relationships as adults. Alois, of course, was never in a safe enough space or had the necessary support system to heal from the trauma he endured. Instead, he ended up internalizing the abuse he experienced and convinced himself he was in control of it, that he was the one manipulating and using the old man, and that has led to him having a skewed perception of himself and his own sexuality, as well as an unhealthy relationship with sex in general.

The human mind will convince itself of all sorts of things in the pursuit of survival. People will cope however they can. There is no wrong way to survive. In Alois’s case, he sold his soul to a demon. Clearly, he has much different motivations and boundaries than a regular real-life person- and often in fiction, an unhealthy mind is much more interesting to write and read about, especially when there’s things like demons involved.

From the beginning of planning this story, I wanted Claude and Alois to have a super messy dynamic. I see Alois and Claude as a narrative foil to Ciel and Sebastian- the same dynamic, a young aristocrat and his demon butler, but taken to the opposite extreme conclusion. The same devotion, obsession, even attraction, but inverted- reluctant, resentful, but no less intense and inescapable. Where Sebastian is loyal, Claude is treacherous, but he is no less drawn to Alois, if only because of the contract between them.

Alois and Claude’s dynamic as I write it is this: Alois may be the master, and he may think he is in control, but he will always get more than he bargains for when it comes to Claude. Of course, I’m writing this commentary months after this chapter came out, and I’ve pushed that dynamic even further in subsequent chapters.

As to how it will end between them- well, you’ll have to wait and see.

On to the climatic title moment of the chapter, the countdown to the new year and the new century: I was just a little kid in 1999, so my memories are vague. I remember some stuff about the Y2K scare (for those of you younger than I am who don’t know what I’m talking about, you can google it, I’m not going off on a tangent here 😆. Anyway, I imagine the coming of a new century must be really exciting, more so than any other new year celebration, because it’s far rarer.

And of course, what better moment to kiss a girl you like for the first time than at such a classic, traditional moment? There’s something so gripping about the turning of the year, that moment when it feels like everything is about to change even though it really isn’t. It gives that same sort of exhilarating feeling as kissing someone for the first time. Kissing someone for the first time is terrifying too, but it’s also amazing.

Of course, things are about to go sideways for Lizzy, so she’s not going to get to experience any of what normally comes after such a thing, at least not for a while.

I like to imagine Ciel and Sebastian standing up on that balcony, looking down into the street over the crowds and the fireworks, and Ciel’s jaw just dropping when he sees Lizzy kissing Sybil. Lizzy?? Kissing a girl?? He’s not jealous or anything, obviously, but it must have been quite a shock for him, it’s no wonder he was staring.

CHAPTER FOUR-POINT-FIVE: INTERLUDE; AULD LANG SYNE

There are going to be a few interludes throughout this fic- they’re really just chapters on they’re own, but they’re shorter parts that feel like they need to stand on their own. Also, I like the word ‘interlude’ and wanted an excuse to feel fancy.

Auld Lang Syne is of course a quite well-known (at least in my neck of the woods) Scottish folk song that people typically sing at New Year’s. it was originally a poem written in the Scots dialect by poet Robert Burns, written in 1788, but he said himself that he had “taken it down from an old man”. The first verse and chorus can be directly attributed to a 1711 folk song by James Watson, the rest being attributed to Burns himself. Watson’s original stanza and refrain are the most memorable of the song’s lyrics:

Should Old Acquaintance be forgot, and never thought upon; The flames of Love extinguished, and fully past and gone: Is thy sweet Heart now grown so cold, that loving Breast of thine; That thou canst never once reflect On old long syne. Chorus: On old long syne my Jo, On old long syne, That thou canst never once reflect, On old long syne.

The phrase “auld lang syne” can be translated to mean “old long since”, but in a more general sense just means “times long past”. The phrase “for auld lang syne” can me taken to mean “for the sake of old times”. The song, while generally sung at the stroke of midnight at the new year, can also be used as a general farewell- it’s about remembering the past while moving toward the future. It’s been sung at graduations, funerals, and other such events for this reason.

Thematically, it’s perfect for where we’re at in the story. “Should old acquaintance be forgot, and never thought upon” is sort of an inverse of what’s happening- Lizzy still thinks of Ciel often, and Ciel has just had his past brought back to him despite having moved on from it. “Is thy sweet love now grown so cold, that loving Breast of thine; that thou canst never once reflect on old lang syne?” Has Ciel really lost all attachment to his past- does he really care so little what happens to the people he once cared about that he can’t even be bothered to look back, or to literally go back to his old life in some sense?

Alois is hungover and yet somehow still a little horny- there’s not too much to say about it other than OOF. I always have more fun writing Claude’s inner monologue anyway (I hate him so much but it’s so fun to write him), so the scene at the breakfast table where he makes the comment about Ciel not having the butler Alois does really tickle me. I love when characters throw shade at each other without realising what they’re saying. And the fact that Alois has to go around solving crimes and blames Ciel for it despite never having met him? Delightful. What a whiny bitch he is.

Abberline is the boss man now, and he’s doing his whole strong man though guy in charge routine, but he can’t fool me. He’s just a little guy. Still, though, it’s not great that someone leaked stuff to the press- it’s almost like whoever did it wants to cause a panic and make sure that the message gets sent to someone… I wonder what it could mean?

I don’t actually know if the London news would be published in Paris so quickly. I’m probably stretching historical accuracy to its breaking point haha, but like I always remind myself, I’m the only one who cares about stuff like that, and it’s my story anyway so ultimately, I can do whatever I want!

Ciel and Sebastian would be walking down the street holding hands if it was allowed. They’re so gross and domestic in this story and I’m not even sorry. Thinking about them going to a café in the morning and sitting looking at the paper and people-watching while Ciel eats a mountain of sugary treats and Sebastian drinks his coffee- I am often inclined to think about little else. I promise that when all of this is over, they will go back to doing that. But the main plot of the story has finally caught up with them.

“Would you hate me terribly if I said I wanted to go back to London?”

“I would hate you terribly if you pretended you did not.”

One of the things Sebastian loves most about Ciel is how unapologetic he is about the things he wants. Ciel’s motives as a human were never about being good- only about serving his family’s name, which was an obligation as well as a desire, but also about revenge, about going to any extent to achieve his goals. People so often sacrifice their dreams or wants for the sake of others, or for the sake of politeness, or decency- but Ciel was never like that. In a lot of ways, Ciel is a selfish person, self-indulgent and stubborn and a lot of other things people normally don’t like. So how could a demon like Sebastian not love him?

For the record, I love Ciel also. I call him selfish and stubborn and indulgent and all of these somewhat negative things, but I mean it affectionately. He’s a pretty little bastard and I love him so much. I think he should get everything he asks for and be allowed to do whatever he wants forever. (Me 🤝 Sebastian).

Okay so. I had to kill someone. There had to be a murder to bring Ciel and Sebastian back to London. It wasn’t going to be Lizzy that dies, obviously, but who else could it have been that would have made Ciel even remotely interested? I didn’t want to kill one of Lizzy’s parents, they’re useful characters to have around. Not Abberline- he’s even more important. So, Edward was the natural choice. I don’t think Ciel liked Edward at all- Edward certainly didn’t like him- but neither do I. Or rather, I don’t really have any feelings for Edward as a character whatsoever- he’s so minor. So murdered it is. The more important part is HOW he was murdered, obviously, but the fact that the victim is someone connected to Ciel’s past is also important.

RIP Edward Midford, thanks for your sacrifice to the plot. You will not be forgotten.

I think Lizzy and Sybil would have probably gotten together that day if Edward hadn’t have died and sent Lizzy on a whole new emotional arc. So maybe actually Edward, fuck you for getting murdered and keeping your sister from getting some. And fuck me for writing it that way I guess 😅

Anyway, that’s all for now! I’m on hiatus right now, and I’m working on the outline for the final arc of the story, and also trying to catch up on these. I’m probably going to start grouping chapters together in posts. There ended up being so many more chapters in this story than I originally planned. See you again soon!

#ttnbd #fanfiction #commentary #black butler #kuroshitsuji #sebaciel #about writing #lord speaks #this is almost 4 thousand words lolsob

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