#it’s so cursed but so funny

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

#yeehaw #1k #5k #10k #posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours? #also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that! #unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference #edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense #also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags #1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now #he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic #2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign #like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock #3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing #it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is #extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once #it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life #i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about #Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect #if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it #aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week

[notherpuppet]

“Look who joined the team! 📻♥️ #livinglegend #hot100 #goham”

#someone on twitter said Alastor in modern clothes looks like if he joined the Vees and they’re so right #this is a cursed image #its also so funny drawing this because he would really never join their team LOL #hazbin hotel #the vees #Vox #valentino hazbin hotel #hazbin velvette #hazbin hotel fanart #alastor #my doods #staticradio

[aquat1cgay]

#everyone dragging etho's setup is so funny #thumb shifting is still cursed as hell though #mumbo jumbo #ethoslab #hermitcraft

[oornithologistt]

vultures amirite?

og image below the cut

#vultures #vulture #how hungry #but i suppose in this case it's #how dead #birds #bird #meme #funny #god. putting the meme funny tags on my post killed me a little inside #anyway i found the image on pinterest thank you pinterest i love you #i wish i could give credit to the photographer though #so also curse you pinterest #for not having reliable image sources #birdblr #turkey vulture #i think?

[nuka-rockit]

something that is so funny to me is the solution to the "why does Durge have amnesia" subplot

no mystical curse, no magic potion, not a spell, no elaborate divine retribution for your failures.

no, Orin just got a really sharp stick, poked a hole in your skull and and got you an improv lobotomy . and put a worm in there

and every character who gets a chance to examine you basically goes WHOA there chief your brain is fucked up. like. thats just straight up brain damage. i cant fix that

#durge #the dark urge #bg3 spoilers #bg3 #baldurs gate 3 spoilers #baldurs gate 3 #theres just something so funny about the answer being so mundane #yeah i mean we could fix a curse but this is faerun #does it LOOK like we know what neurosurgery is? #my stuff #ok to rb

[lazycranberrydoodles]

getting back into the untamed and i had a thought. / follow for more yllz babygirlism

#i saw someone a while ago talking about how wwx always has good intentions…. #his personal road to hell was paved with good intentions yes but i’m not sure where making a guy eat his own legs fits #it is so funny to me how the tiger tally/yin iron influences wei wuxian differently in each adaptation #i remember making a sliding scale of how ‘culpable’ wwx is from adaptation to adaptation #based on how they portray the mental effects of the iron #but for the life of me i cannot find it :( #wwx really said ‘if i had a cursed amulet i simply wouldnt be corrupted🙄🙄’ #that’s basically what he tells lan zhan in this episode…. if necromancy was having ill effects i would notice #and you know. at this point he is lying about everything. but i do wonder how much he actually believes that 👁️👁️ #how much of his mind is resigned to doing whatever needs to be done to exact revenge regardless of harm to himself #and how much genuinely believes that he’s smart and competent enough to make it through whole #the answer of course is BOTH!! bisexual pride #mdzs #art #mdzs spoilers #wei wuxian #lan wangji #wangxian #mo dao zu shi #grandmaster of demonic arts #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #my art #the grandmaster of diabolism #cql #the untamed #魔道祖师 #陈情令 #mdzs meme #doodle #lmao

[timelord-of-the-moon]

#our flag means death #ofmd #is this anything? #idk #anyways he is SO fucking funny in episode with his fucking cursed suit #our flag means death spoilers #ofmd spoilers

[assiraphales]

when i hear “tumblr is shutting down” I’m suddenly living in a hillside village with a little boy yelling through the streets about a wolf every other week. like sorry unless the wolf bites me in the ass it’s not worth worrying about

#tho if it really did shut down I would cry #like yes curse lifted. funny ha ha. but also so sad #bc so much content and community would be lost #there’s no other social media platform like it #and I’d never be able to recreate my experience anywhere else #let’s not think of this

[helpallthenamesaretakenblog]

plot twist: when they adapt ttc, percy and annabeth dont ballroom dance at olympus at the end. instead, percy delicately holds out his hand. he asks annabeth for a dance. annabeth shyly says yes and takes his hand. and then it cuts to annabeth with cooling glasses freestyling while percy beatboxes

#idk why i posted this #just thought itd be funny #ah yes so romantic #percy jackson #pjo #annabeth chase #rick riordan #percabeth #pjo fandom #pjo tv show #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo tv series #pjo disney+ #pjo show #pjo tv #pjo fic #pjo spoilers #pjo series #funny #percy x annabeth #percy series #percy pjo #percy and annabeth #pjotv #annabeth #pjoedit #heroes of olympus #the titan's curse #crack post #percyverse

[radiance1]

The League tried to interrupt a summoning of a powerful being from the Infinite Realms. From the information they collected, the being isn't of the status of a royalty, but they still had to be careful as the being the summoners tried to call forth was still of noble status.

They failed.

The head cultist finished the ritual, the last words to finish the summoning left their tongue and the room was suddenly doused in heat, as black flame came to life from within the circle, twisting and turning, back and forth until a pair of red eyes suddenly flashed from inside the twisting pillar of flame and just as suddenly as the eyes appeared, was the pillar broken apart.

What was left behind was the figure of a giant phoenix, wings spread as embers black as night gently fell down to the floor below and suddenly disappearing, as if they were never there in the first place.

"Who dares to disturb-" The being started, eyes scanning the crowd below before stilling, extremely and worryingly quiet. One of them quietly cursed. "Constantine..." The creature's voice was low, dangerously low, no doubt anger in its voice as it called out the Warlock's name.

Everyone tensed, expecting something dangerous, except for the cultists, and the Head, who turned his head towards them and smiled, obviously expecting them to be reduced to not even ash.

"100 years. One. Hundred. Years." The being spoke, and confusion wormed its way into the hearts of all those present. "100 years I have waited for you, and when we finally meet once again it's not even you summoned me but these-" The creature waved a wing at the cultist below. "-These fatuous and vacuous little things."

"And what is this? You surrounded yourself with those not even of human birth before you have even thought about me?" The noble's eyes narrowed. "Did our relationship mean nothing to you?

Someone, probably not Constantine, choked.

"Well then, after all of this time you can at least make yourself useful." In a flash of black fire, Constantine was brought from within the ranks of heroes and in front of the beast, a man who seemed to be trying to-and unsuccessfully- lighting a smoke. "Ah, why do that when you have me?" The being purred, bending down to apparently light a smoke before freezing, as if remembering what exactly it was doing, but the action was already done, and Constantine was killing his lungs away.

The phoenix snapped back up to standing above everyone else, clearing its throat as if what happened decidedly didn't happen.

"What exactly did you want me to be useful for, love?" Constantine asked, expelling the smoke from his lungs and deciding that this might as well be happening. The noble huffed, folding its wings at its sides as it stared down at its apparent lover. "Take care of our son for once in your sad, pathetic life."

This time, not only did Constantine choke, but a good chunk of people there did as well. Constantine ran a hand through his hair, looking up at the phoenix incredulously. "Aren't we both men?"

The phoenix looked at his lover as if he were stupid. "Your point?"

"I-" Constantine sighed, took a breath, held, then expelled more smoke from his lungs. Apparently, he decided not to question anything anymore. "You know what? Sure, where is the little bugger?"

Over the next few moments, both the Justice League and Cultists were treated to the noble transforming into a human (still having wings) and handing over their apparent child-who looked nothing like them by being a dragon, but who were they to question the apparent reproduction of a being from the Infinite Realms- and being lectured about what not to do and what to do and how he should be cared for.

Also, a warning for his many powers.

Then the Duke stole a kiss (One that he claimed was long overdue) and left.

The room was silent, only the sounds of breathing occupying the room as the temperature was brought back down to normal levels.

A moment later, Batman walked up to the nearby cultist and punched him across the face and knocking him out cold, suddenly reminding everyone what exactly they were here for.

A while later, in the meeting room, everyone looked at Constantine. Who had a baby eastern dragon wrapped around one arm (who was apparently his child) and rubbing his temple with the other.

"I can't explain this."

===

Danny was actually not Constantine kid, neither was he Vlad's. Biologically, at the very least, however. Vlad did adopt both him and Jasmine a while back after their whole parent fiasco.

They're dead, sadly unable to become ghosts, or perhaps not so sadly.

Of course, they unfortunately outlived Jasmine, which was to be expected, but Vlad and Danny did grow close enough that they no longer viewed each other as enemies.

However, who could have expected that Danny, finally ascending to his princely status, would turn him back into a literal child because he was, for all intents and purposes, one by Dragon standards.

Utter malarkey, he would say.

Taking care of that boy was the worst few memories he has ever had. He was constantly being kept from his sleep, his work being interrupted constantly, and the child managed to find a way to leave his sight at each and every turn.

But there were some sweet moments, he would say.

It's only reasonable, however, that his lover (who he hasn't seen for an entire century might he add) share the workload.

#dc x dp #dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dpxdc #dcxdp #dc x dp crossover #I don't know how to write John Constantine #But I probably can't do worse then the current writers of DC or Marvel. #Probably. #Anyways. #shitpost #At least I think this is a shitpost #Idk #Or maybe its a #crack fic #crackship #But I thought of this and I find it funny so you all shall be cursed with this

[renaissanceousia]

no bc with the titan's curse the series gets real dark real fast

#he's so funny for this phrasing likee #“kids are dying” #well yes #but like omg cousin lets calm down #percy jackson #the titans curse #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson spoilers #pjo #pjo tv show #pjo tv series #pjo series #pjo spoilers #pjo fandom #pjo tv adaptation #percy series #walker scobell

[deeva-arud]

A considerable amount of makeup was used to cover Deeva's freckles and face marks, and Cater also had to use magic to make her clothes his size. They did this as a joke, but they sure were committed to it! 💪

Original style swap challenge by @ashipiko ! (see her post here!!) If anyone wants to give it a try, go ahead, it's really fun!!! <3

#I could finally finish this!!! #thought it would be super cursed but why does CayCayfied Deeva actually look good?? #well and Cater uhh... I can't look at him for long without laughing he looks like a sad wet cat 😭​😭​ #Cater is lucky Deeva has long hair. He can fidget with it all he wants in class while being subtle about it #Also are those really his freckles or just makeup?? Hmm hmm I'll leave it to everyone's opinion~ #personally I've always been VERY fond of the headcanon that he actually has freckles <33 #And no I didn't forget to draw her wings. Cater's jacket doesn't have slits on the back so they're just a tiny lump under the fabric HDFHDH #Oh but please do imagine Cater having a paper with poorly drawn wings taped on his back. It's a very funny thought #twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland oc #twst oc #twst cater #deeva twst #cateeva #my art

[deoidesign]

Worry free, guarantee!

loved painting this one, I love illustrated advertisements

#for some reason everything I was sketching was coming out really violent idk so I just went with it #tbh I'm not even really into the like 'girlboss kill your husband' thing I love my partner dearly #HOWEVER... it is fun in fiction... and yknow what. #sometimes you gotta kill your husband #anyways. as per use if I think it's funny I have to do it so. #my curse strikes again #illustration #digital art #my art #art #artists on tumblr #digital painting #digitalart #not ocs #I had to research vintage shampooers for this #when no one else got me I know extremely niche forums that look straight out of 2004 got me

[turrondeluxe]

Aren't you tired of being silly?

Don't you wanna go apeshit?

#the first thing i draw in days and is angry as fuck mikey #LET THIS GUY BE ANGRY AS FUCK PLEASE #alsoi think itd be funny if he was the first one to curse #raph would be so angry lmao #i'll answer other asks soon i just haven't been feeling very motivated lately lol #tmnt #tmnt 2012 #tmnt 2k12 #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt mikey #tmnt 2012 michelangelo #tmnt 2012 mikey #my art #doodles #eye strain #i guess? its not for me but ive been told my color palette its pretty eye strainy lmao

[craykaycee]

@vurelly Ask and you shall receive

I think the language filter malfunctioned-- good thing the kids just left xDD

((here's the vid link with the audio that inspired this))

#''headspace'' Moon is so friggen funny to me-- #I get to go all ham and cheese croissant on his face it's so fun xDD #fnaf #fnaf sb #fnaf security breach #security breach #five nights at freddys #fnaf daycare attendant #fnaf sun #fnaf moon #sundrop #moondrop #cursing #cray kay art #Imma queue this up for the morning as well-- it is past 1 am :D #Convoluted Theatrics

[heybiji]

dandelion talks about how when he died it was like he was floating in a sea of black, and the paladin, lafavel, tries to talk him into finding a deity because he's worried about this warlock's soul*

*it doesn't work. dande gets defensively antagonistic

#dungeons and dragons #dnd #ocs #dnd art #dnd character #dnd oc #dandelion treehollow #lafavel adalhard #lafavel says i know you live a long time but you're not going to live forever #dande says well i have plenty of time #then an hour later forgets about the curse in his head that goes off if he wanders off on his own #and it does 30 psychic damage and almost kills him LOL #embarrassing behavior #dande's had some issues with the dark every since he got spirited away to meet his hag mom for the first time in a century and it was DARK #“it feels like that dark is following me...” #honestly very funny that the paladin is so concerned for dande's well being he's like bro you need jesus #he's not wrong #ravelers