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#it's also really absolutely incredibly awesome
arthur-r · 7 months
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had a really good night. feeling a little bit sick to my stomach but what can you do
#met seth from poolboy again today!! twice if you count each occurrence how i did the first time#so i’ve seen poolboy twice and theoretically met seth five times. i mean that’s how many conversations i had so. pretty fucking awesome#however i feel a little bit ill. cause of listening to my recording and hearing how awfully annoying i am#the keyboardists fiancé was actually standing right in front of us and so after the show he talked to us#cause me and my two friends who were there we were singing along to all the songs and poolboy is not a very famous band#so after the set was done the guy was like asking us questions and then he’s like yeah i’m actually engaged to jp from poolboy#and anyway that was really really cool in the moment. i just feel a little bit ill hearing myself talk to him?#like ‘poolboy is my fAvorite band .. ‘ ‘..my favorite song of theirs tOtal is corrections’#i dont know. i think i’m just dysphoric and autistic so i have to feel bad about conversations when i have them recorded#but. um. i met jp dreblow’s fiancé that’s Pretty Cool. and i talked to seth and he gave me a free CD!!!!#cause i only had a $20 or a $5 and it was $10 and they didn’t have change and so he said it’s fine just take it for free!!!!#this was after i told him that they’re my favorite band and the absolute coolest and that we had seen them before back in january#and all of that. and i did meet him three times that day (shdhdf it’s a silly way to count it) but also got his autograph so. i’m really#lucking out with these interactions. secret to a dream life: have the most random guys who live in your state be your favorite band#it can’t go wrong. these guys are absolutely incredible and i have had so many random opportunities to say hi and be really excited#anyways i have a year of the weasel vinyl from the january show (with autograph) and a good orchard CD from today (free and with lyrics)#and i got a photo with seth today. i’m pretty sure what i said was ‘could i get a photo with you if that’s normal?’ and he said yeah sure#i feel like my relationship with poolboy is like. the opposite of a parasocial relationship. or like the most amplified version of that#cause i think of them as super cool unattainable celebrities but it’s like. some guy with a masters in library science who i’m probably the#first person to have asked for an autograph or a photo or anything like that. but see there’s the funny thing is that it’s both kinds of it#on the one hand i think of them as fancy fancy when they’re just some guys. but i also think of myself as The Only Poolboy Superfan which is#not necessarily true. who knows really. but they’re sure pretty freaking awesome and i sure got to see them today!!!!#anyway i’m real tired but i was really happy to see poolboy today. even though i feel a little bit sick about how i speak and sound#cause that’s not going to change. and it’s not like anyone said anything about it so i can assume they didn’t notice#i just have this creeping feeling at all times that everyone i meet is just treating me nice cause i’m too obviously autistic#like they hear what i say and they hate me and they judge me but they say well clearly something’s wrong with this kid so i’ll let it slide#but hey. some people love me. so hopefully your average stranger doesn’t hate me as much as i’m scared they might. i sure hope they don’t#anyway i had a good night it was really good i’m just being me a little bit. i hope everyone is well i’m about to go to sleep#friends only#i’ll be around in the morning this is my last tag i love you all very much and see you tomorrow goodnight
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crimefightrmoved · 2 years
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nobody:  me: i love the elaborate, intricate and deeply serious batm*n mythos the mythos:
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almost played through the entirety of the game in one day this is what a hyperfixation does to a mf
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hellohoihey · 1 year
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just remembered wallonia exists and people there speak French (mostly) and also apparently the English name for these people is fucking Walloons bhahaha wtf
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ncityzen · 2 years
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there are many Many things stressing me out beyond comprehension in my life rn BUT my supervisor today said I was "progressing adequately" and I almost felt like crying from joy right there and then
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passivetimber · 4 months
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feel like absolute shit.. trying to decide what to watch.. maybe restart house md and see how far I get this time. or I need to catch up with the recent bobs burgers eps. or maybe a movie.. hmm much to consider
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roaringroa · 6 months
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commented on a gymnastics video about how it was a shame that the international broadcast for yesterday's world championship women's finals didn't show julia soares' from brazil solo because i loved it (i watched the brazilian broadcast that did show it), she did so well especially considering she had just fallen off the beam, she aced it and helped give confidence back to the whole team and then linked to the only youtube video i could find for it. and then a middle aged slightly butch woman replied with "thank you dear, i'm going to watch it. big hug!"
what i'm getting at is that my rizz is off the charts women love me
#lmao but i did find it heart warming like thank you middle aged kind of butch woman <3#also the final was insane like i watched most of it literally trembling feeling my heart race#i was rooting so so so hard for brazil and i cried a little when we won silver#we had never won a teams world medal!! ever!!#and our athletes have been through so much: rebeca flavinha and jade especially#like jade is 32!! she won her first (out of now three) world medal 16 years ago! there was a gymnast from another country that wasn't born!#and she got hurt last olympic cycle and only just came back!! acing her vault at 32!!!#and flavinha had never won a world medal despite being one of the current best!! she was always away for medical reasons or extremely unluc#and rebeca god rebeca had 3 ucls!!! and she came back won two olympic medals last olympics and of course did awesome yesterday#current 2nd best in the world only behind simone biles who is simone biles like she's just in a category of her own#shout out to team france too the last time they had won was in 1950 and they qualified at 7th so they really weren't expecting bronze#but the girls gave their all and especially mdjds absolutely aced it like that beam performance was beautiful and under so much pressure!!#anyway i'm not gonna pretend that i follow gymnastics that closely#but whenever i know there's international events finals i like to watch if i can or at least the highlights#it's such an incredible and jaw dropping sport and the women's especially is so beautiful#plus brazil solos always so fun with good music choice and actual dancing in the choreo#daiane dos santos with brasileirinho changed lives#my post
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ashintheairlikesnow · 7 months
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Okay so here, I think, is why I think Red, White and Royal Blue succeeds spectacularly as a romcom, and actually to me is a better-than-average take on the genre.
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First, the leads have absolutely scorching chemistry. They are incredibly believable as two men absolutely infatuated with each other. They each kiss like drowning men shown water, right down to how each grabs at the other, at hair or back or neck and face.
They each have developed their character having a specific characteristic even when flirting or kissing. Henry grabs Alex's hair, for example, every single time, in a way that makes it clear he spends serious time thinking about that hair.
Fair enough, Henry.
They also do something even goddamn better.
They are friends. They are believable as two people who could actually get along long enough to fall in love.
They are allowed to become FRIENDS.
They are given time to get to know each other before they get physical. You can feel their interest in each other growing. And, to my opinion, you can tell that Henry is feeling Alex out through texts to see if the interest might be reciprocated even though he thinks it can't possibly be.
One thing that kills me about romcoms is how the leads will have witty "sexy" banter but don't seem to actually like each other. They are enemies who fall into bed but aren't really believable as lovers.
Henry and Alex are believable, because they... Well. They're impossibly silly even when tearing at each other's clothes. They have awkward moments.
They laugh.
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Alex laughs in bed. He holds Henry in a way that is romantic, openly so. Henry is overcoming the conditioned hesitation and avoidance he has, his smiles and warmth and laughter come with rare vulnerability - Alex is a man who throws himself head first into life and has no such compunctions in the moment. He laughs because this is awesome and Jesus Christ, Prince Henry is too hot to be real.
They like each other, they stumble, they laugh.
But also, another reason this works so well?
The sex scene isn't scorching.
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Watching the sex scene felt realistically intimate. It felt like I had walked in one real people and needed to leave. It was intense in a way that felt like something I maybe wasn't meant to see.
It was filmed so well. So much romanticism and deeply felt adoration in a simple grasping of a hand, the look in soft eyes, a hand pressed against a back. The edge of a knee just in frame. Looking up and looking down.
It felt like we walked into their room during and saw them both laid utterly bare.
Henry's look of vulnerability and nerves and pleasure, Alex looking slowly over his face to take it all in. Moving slowly, then, when everything they do before this is hurried or hidden.
It works as a romcom because you believe 100% these two men could get to like each other, fall in love, and stay that way.
You believe Henry's very real terror of rejection from the public because he already knows his family, beyond his sister, will reject him. You believe that Alex is a headstrong idealist who is sure that you can bulldoze through any wall too tall to climb.
And you believe that between the two of them, they can find a way around the wall entirely.
This movie is a master class on how a movie can get you to suspend so much disbelief if the leads sell their characters. The importance of believable chemistry.
And also... Isn't it nice to see a queer love story in a world that is, in some ways, just a few shades better than our own?
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P.S. you cannot tell me Stephen Fry did not chew the goddamn scenery in circles all around everyone during his single scene. That man was having a ball.
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wilwheaton · 9 months
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When you watch The Curse, you are watching two children who were abused and exploited daily during production. No adults protected us.
This was originally published on my blog in August, 2022.
I had a wonderful time at Steel City Comicon this weekend. It was my first time at this particular con, so I didn’t know there was such a huge contingent of horror fans, creators, and vendors who attend.
I love horror, and I was pretty psyched to be in the same place as John Carpenter and Tom Savini, across the street from the Dawn of the Dead mall. Pittsburgh feels like one of the places horror was invented, at least to me.
A number of these horror fans came to see me, and asked me to sign posters and other things from a movie my parents forced me to do when I was 13, called The Curse. I had to tell each of these people that I would not sign anything associated with that movie, because I was abused and exploited during production. The time I spent on that film remains the most traumatizing time of my life, and though I am a 50 year-old man, just typing this now makes my hands shake with remembered fear of a 13 year-old boy who nobody protected, and the absolute fury the 50 year-old man feels toward the people who hurt him.
I told this story in Still Just A Geek, and I’ve talked about it in some podcasts I did on the promo tour, but I’ve never put it out in public like this, in its entirety.
I suspect someone at the publisher would prefer I tease this and hope it drives book sales from people who want to read all of it, but I honestly don’t want to have another weekend like this one where everything is awesome, except the few times people who have no idea (and why should they) put that fucking poster in front of me, and all the fear, abandonment, and trauma come flooding back as I tell them that I won’t sign it, and why.
To their credit, each person was as horrified as they should have been, told me they had no idea (if they didn’t read my book why would they), and quickly put the poster away. They were all understanding. I am grateful for that.
But I really don’t need to tell this story over and over again, so here it is, with a child abuse and exploitation content warning, so I can just tell people to Google it.
After Stand by Me, everything changed. The attention from entertainment journalists, casting directors, and especially teen magazines came pouring in. The movie was a generational hit, beloved by critics and audiences alike, and every single one of us could pick anything to do next.
River’s parents and his agent got him Mosquito Coast, with Harrison Ford, as his next movie. I also auditioned for the role, but I knew even then that River was going to book the job. He was perfect, and I’d have to wait a little bit for my opportunity to come along.
I went on a lot of theatrical auditions after Stand by Me. I had tons of meetings with directors and the heads of casting at every major studio. It was all a very big deal, and I felt like we were all looking for something really special and amazing as my follow-up to Stand by Me.
At some point, a couple of producers contacted my agent with an offer to play one of the leads in an adaptation of H. P. Lovecraft’s “The Colour Out of Space.” The script was titled The Farm. (It would, of course, be changed when the film was released).
I read it. I did not like it. It was a shitty horror movie, and I saw that right away. It was the sort of thing you rented on Friday when the new release you wanted was already out of the store.
My mother, already an incredibly manipulative person, used every tool at her disposal to change my mind. My father threatened me, mocked me, told me “It’s your decision” when it clearly wasn’t. It was all so weird; I didn’t understand why they cared so much.
I told my parents I didn’t like it and didn’t want to do it. I clearly recall thinking it was a piece of shit that would hurt my career.
It wasn’t the first thing that had come our way that I wanted to pass on, and every other time, it hadn’t been a very big deal.
Sidebar: I was cast in Twilight Zone: The Movie, in 1983. The film tells four stories, and I was cast as the kid who can wish people into cartoonland. It was a GREAT role, in a movie I still love. (Note that Twilight Zone had four directors. One of them got three people killed. The segment I was cast in was not that one. I mention this because too many people zero in on this to deflect from what this whole thing is actually about.)
But I was CONVINCED by my parochial school teacher that if I worked on The Twilight Zone, which she had determined was satanic, I would go to hell. (This woman and her bullshit played a big role in my conversion to atheism at a young age, but when she told me that, I was all-in on the supernatural story they taught us in religion class.) I was so scared, more scared than I’d ever been to that point in my life, I cried and wailed and begged my parents to not make me do the movie. And I never told them why, because I was afraid my dad would laugh at me for being weak and afraid. My agent tried to talk me into it, and I wouldn’t budge. It’s the only thing I deeply and truly regret passing on, and I really hate I made that choice for such a stupid reason.
Okay. Back to The Curse.
This time, when I told them how much I hated it, they wouldn’t listen to me. My mother, already an incredibly manipulative person, used every tool at her disposal to change my mind. My father threatened me, mocked me, told me “It’s your decision” when it clearly wasn’t. It was all so weird; I didn’t understand why they cared so much.
That is, until they made me take a meeting with the producers of the movie, in their giant conference room on the top floor of a tall building in Hollywood. All I remember about this place was that it was huge; the table was way too big for the five of us who spread around it, and there were floor-to-ceiling windows on three of the walls, but the room was still dark. There was a weird optical illusion in the center of the table, this thing they sold in the Sharper Image catalog, made from two reflective dishes with a hole in the top of one. You placed an object in the bottom of the bottom dish, and it made it look like that object was floating above the whole thing. They had a plastic spider in it. What a strange detail for me to remember, but it’s as clear in my memory as if I were sitting in that room right now.
One man, who I presumed was the executive producer, was European or Middle Eastern (I didn’t know the difference then, he was just Not Like People I Knew), and I was instantly afraid of him. He was intimidating, and seemed like a person who got what he wanted.
So we sat there, my father who didn’t give a shit about me, my mother who was cosplaying as someone with experience, and me, thirteen years old, awkward as fuck, and scared to death.
I don’t remember what they said to me in their pitch or anything other than how uncomfortable and anxious I was to even be in that room. I tried so hard to be grown up and mature, but I — and my parents — was way out of my depth. I’d done one big movie and that was it. We didn’t have my agent with us, who had lots of experience and would have known what questions to ask.
No, in place of my experienced agent, my mother had decided she was going to be my manager, and she tackled the responsibility with an enthusiasm that was only matched by her absolute incompetence and inability to go toe-to-toe with producers the way my agent did. She was outwitted, out-thought, and outmaneuvered at every turn.
“You don’t have a choice,” my father commanded. “You are doing this movie.”
So we sat there, my father who didn’t give a shit about me, my mother who was cosplaying as someone with experience, and me, thirteen years old, awkward as fuck, and scared to death.
At some point, this man, who is represented in my memory by big Jim Jones sunglasses under dark hair above an open collar, said, “We are offering you a hundred thousand dollars and round-trip travel for your whole family. We will cast your sister, Amy, to play your sister in the movie.”
It all made sense, now. I was only thirteen, but I knew my parents were pushing me so hard because this company was offering me — them, really — more money than I’d ever imagined I’d earn in my life, much less a single job.
I knew that the right thing to do, the smart thing to do, was to say no. There would be other opportunities, and it was stupid to cash myself out of feature films for what I thought was, in the grand scheme of things, not very much money.
It’s incredible to me that I knew all of this. It’s incredible to me that I could see all these things, plainly and clearly, and my parents couldn’t (or, more likely, chose not to).
So after this man made his offer, all the adults in the room ganged up on me, selling me HARD on this movie.
My mother said, “Don’t you want your sister to have the same opportunities you’ve had? Wouldn’t it be fun and exciting to go to Rome? Think of all the history!”
The experience was awful. It was the worst experience I have ever had on a set in my life, by every single metric. The movie is awful, and it is the embarrassment I knew it would be.
I don’t think about this very often, because it’s super upsetting to me. Right now, I’m so angry at my parents for subjecting me and my sister to this entire experience. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
In that moment, I felt bullied and trapped. All these adults were talking to me at the same time, and I just wanted it to stop. I just wanted to go home and get out of this room. I just wanted to go be a kid, so I did what I’d learned to do to survive: I gave in and did what my parents wanted.
The experience was awful. It was the worst experience I have ever had on a set in my life, by every single metric. The movie is awful, and it is the embarrassment I knew it would be.
But here’s the thing: when you watch The Curse, you are watching two children, me and my sister, who were abused on a daily basis. The production did not follow a single labor law. They worked us for twelve hours a day, on multiple film units (while I work on First unit, second unit sets up and waits for me. When I should get a break to rest, they send me to Second unit, then to Third unit, then back to First unit. I was 13.) without any breaks, five days a week. I was exhausted the entire time. I was inappropriately touched by two different adults during production. I knew it was wrong, but I was so scared and ashamed, and I felt so unsupported, I didn’t tell anyone. I knew my dad wouldn’t believe me, and my mother would blame me. Anything to keep the production happy, that’s what she did. That was more important to her than the health and safety of her children. The director was coked out of his mind most of the time, incompetent, and so busy fucking or trying to fuck one of the women in the cast, he was worse than useless. He was a fading actor who was cosplaying as a director, as in over his head as my mother. My sister and I were never safe. Instead of harmless atmospheric SFX smoke, they set hay on fire in barrels and blew actual smoke onto the set. They took buckets of talc, broken wood, bits of wallpaper and plaster, and threw it into my face during a scene inside the collapsing house. My sister is in a scene where she goes to get eggs from some chickens, and they attack her. So they hired Lucio Fulci, the Italian horror master, to direct her sequence. His idea, which everyone was totally on board with, was to throw chickens at my sister. Live chickens, live roosters, live birds. Just throw them at a nine-year-old girl. Oh, and then tie them to her arms and legs so they’ll peck her. All of this happened under my mother’s observation, and with her full participation.
Everything I need to know about who my parents are is wrapped up in that experience: the total lack of concern for my safety and happiness, treating me like an asset instead of a son, lying to me, manipulating me, and using me to get things they wanted, and then gaslighting me about it.
If just ONE of the things I can remember happened to someone I loved, I would have grabbed my kids, gone to the airport, and flown home. Fuck those abusive assholes in the production. Let the lawyers sort it all out. Nobody hurts my children and gets away with it.
My mom says she “had some talks” with the producers. She claims that, once, she wouldn’t let us leave the hotel. (God, what a fucking dump that place was. It was just slightly better than a hostel.) I have no memory of that, but honestly the entire experience was so traumatic, I’ve blocked most of it out.
The movie was the commercial and critical failure I knew it would be. My parents spent the money. I don’t know what they spent it on. I got to keep fifteen cents of every dollar, so . . . yay?
My sister and I hardly ever talk about this. I suspect it was as upsetting and traumatic for her as it was for me. I told her I was writing about it, and asked her if she remembered anything. She told me she’d been lied to her whole life about this movie. Our mother let her believe she had been cast on the strength of her audition. “I was excited to work with you,” she said. She reminded me about some stuff I’d blocked out, including a scene where my character’s older brother (played by an actor named Malcolm Danare, who was kind and gentle, and made both of us feel safer when he was around) shoves my character into a pile of cow shit. When it came time to shoot the scene, the mud they’d put together to be the cow shit looked an awful lot like cow shit. When Malcolm pushed me into it, we all found out it was real cow shit. I was FURIOUS. The director had lied to me and had allowed me to have my entire body shoved into an actual pile of actual cow shit. I don’t remember what I said, but I remember he treated me the exact same way my father did whenever I got upset: he laughed at me, told me I was being too sensitive, reminded me that he was the director and he wanted to get a “real” performance out of me, and concluded, “If it bothers you so much, we’ll get you a hepatitis shot,” before he walked away.
My sister also recalled that, after she survived the scene with the chickens, it was the producers’ idea to give her one as a pet.
Okay, let’s unpack that for a quick second: you’ve been traumatized by these birds, so we’re going to give you one as a pet. That you’ll somehow keep in your hotel, and then will somehow get back to America. It will shock you to learn that neither of those things happened.
She remembered, as I do, the huge fight I had with my parents in our kitchen, where I told them I hated the script and I hated the movie. I didn’t want to do it, and I hated that they were making me do it.
“You don’t have a choice,” my father commanded. “You are doing this movie.”
“This is the only film you are being offered,” my mother lied to me. She made me feel like, if I didn’t do this movie, I would never do another movie again in my life. I had to do this movie. As my father bellowed, I had no choice.
Both of my parents denied this argument ever happened. Can I tell you how reassuring it is to know that my sister, who was also there, remembers it the same way I do?
The makeup department decided they would literally cut my little sister’s face with a scalpel, in three places, and put bandages over them.
But one thing she told me, the thing I did not know, the thing that makes me so angry I want to break things, actually managed to make the entire experience even worse than I remembered it.
There’s a scene after her chicken incident where I check up on her in her bedroom. She’s got cuts and bruises, and I guess we talk about it. I don’t remember and I can’t watch the movie because I’m terrified it will give me a PTSD flashback (I’ve had one of those and I recommend avoiding it). Here’s the thing about that scene: she has some cuts on her face, and those cuts are real. They are not makeup.
I’m going to repeat that. My nine-year-old little sister had actual cuts on her face that were placed there by an adult, on purpose.
The makeup department decided they would literally cut my little sister’s face with a scalpel, in three places, and put bandages over them. My sister told me our mother wasn’t in the makeup room when this happened — honestly, it seemed like our mother was strangely and conveniently absent when most of the really terrible things happened to us on the set — and when my sister told her what they’d done, she “lost her shit” at the production. She was pissed, I guess, which is appropriate and surprising. I wonder what would have to have happened for her to put us on a plane and get us home to safety? I mean, her son being abused daily didn’t do it, and her daughter being CUT IN THE FACE ON PURPOSE didn’t do it.
I just . . . I can’t. I can’t understand or comprehend allowing your own children to be physically and emotionally abused. They were literally selling my sister and me to these people, like we were some kind of commodity.
This was a tough conversation. My sister’s experience with our parents is very different from mine. My sister and I love each other. We’re close. I know it’s hard for her to hear that her brother, who she loves, was so abused by her parents, who she also loves. I was really grateful she made the time to talk to me about it, and grateful the experience wasn’t as horrible for her as it was for me.
As we were finishing our call, Amy also remembered one man, a young Italian named Luka, who was our driver for the movie. I haven’t thought about him in thirty years, but I can see his face now. He was kind, he was friendly, he taught us how to kick a soccer ball, and in the middle of an abusive, torturous experience, he stood out as a kind and gentle man. I mention him because she remembered him, which made me remember him, and goddammit I want at least one small part of this thing to not be awful.
The Curse remains one of the most consequential times the adults in my life failed to protect me. I’m 50. I still have nightmares.
Ultimately, as I predicted and feared, this piece of shit movie cashed me out of respectable films forever. I got offers for movies, but they were always mindless comedies or exploitative horror films. They were never the serious dramas I wanted to work in after Stand by Me. The industry looked at me and River, wondering if one or both of us would become a breakout star. They quickly saw that River was doing real acting work, and I was in this piece of shit. For River, Stand by Me was a beginning. For me, it would turn out to be pretty much everything, at least as far as film goes.
There are thousands of reasons film careers do and don’t take off. Maybe mine wouldn’t have taken off anyway. Clearly, it’s not where my life ended up, and I’m super okay with that now. But when all of this happened, it hurt and haunted me.
The Curse remains one of the most consequential times the adults in my life failed to protect me. I’m 50. I still have nightmares. Everything I need to know about who my parents are is wrapped up in that experience: the total lack of concern for my safety and happiness, treating me like an asset instead of a son, lying to me, manipulating me, and using me to get things they wanted, and then gaslighting me about it.
This annotation is the last thing I wrote before I turned this manuscript in, because opening these wounds is hard and painful. I put it off as long as I could, and I feel like I’m still holding back, because just this small glimpse of the experience has taken me a week to write. I can’t imagine trying to go back and unpack the whole thing. (Note that is not in the book: I’ve made an EMDR appointment to work on this because the nightmares have come back after the weekend).
Fuck The Curse, and fuck every single person who exploited and hurt two beautiful children to make it. You all participated in child abuse, and you all knew better. Shame on all of you. I hope this follows you to the end of your life. I hope that living with what you did to innocent children has been as hard for you as it has been for me, because you deserve no less.
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tamberella · 1 month
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Congratulations on your author debut, I'm so excited for your book!! 😇💕
Would you consider talking about the whole process of becoming a book illustrator /children's book author?
Thank you so much, I really appreciate it!! And I'd be happy to share the process!
It all started for me with my 3dTotal artbook. 3dTotal is a small publisher in the UK, and they mainly focus on collections of artists' work. They use Kickstarter to fund each book, and my agent (the amazing Seth Fishman at Gernert) discovered me through the Kickstarter for my artbook Windows to Worlds!
He asked if I had any interest in working on graphic novels or picture books, and I had already been thinking about picture books! He found me my first picture book project with Penguin Workshop, Mother of Sharks, written by the awesome Melissa Cristina Márquez, which came out last year!
While I was working on Mother of Sharks, I was also talking with him about developing The Bakery Dragon, based of course on this painting, which was (and is) one of my proudest artistic moments.
For a little background on the painting, I painted it right after a really challenging couple of months medically - I was dealing with medical complications from my chronic illness for about 6 months, and I wasn't able to finish a single painting the whole time, I was just too exhausted from hospital visits and being in pain. That painting was the first piece I was able to actually complete (both emotionally and literally) in about half a year. So it always held a really special place in my heart, and I really wanted to keep living in that little world. I think there's something in it that is very special to me, about being outside in the cold, seeing warmth and love through a glass barrier, and wanting desperately to reach it.
With Seth's guidance, over a couple months, I developed a pitch for it. The script developed slowly alongside the designs for characters, locations, etc.
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(Early version of Ember above! He has changed a bit!)
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I thought I had already read a lot of picture books, I've always loved them, but I read hundreds and hundreds during this process. There is something uniquely fun and challenging about telling a complete narrative in 48 pages (which is already a long picture book, many are 32!) My book also pulls some elements from comics, such as speech bubbles, which I found to be incredible assets for humor and character development.
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My pitch included designs, some early example spreads, and a rough script with story beats and jokes! My agent took it out into the world, and the publisher we ended up going forward with was Knopf, an imprint of Penguin Random House! I absolutely love the Knopf team and the beautiful books they put out! My editor, Katherine Harrison, really understood what I wanted to accomplish and has been so incredibly helpful in her guidance!
And from there... through rewrites, dialog adjustments, and lots and lots of drawings, it became a book! I'm happy to answer questions about the process! I'll leave you guys with a little preview from the interior of the book! (And of course you can pre-order it here, gotta learn the author skill of always including that link haha!)
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ashwii · 9 months
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INTRODUCING... "TMNT: SPLATTERED NEON"
HEHEHEHE IM SO HAPPY THAT I FINALLY GET TO SHARE THIS!! This has been a REALLY cool project in the works for a hot second, so I really hope yall enjoy it!! I MEAN, THEIR OWN THEME?? HOW COOL IS THAT HEHE <33
Big, ENORMOUS thank you to @jokingmaiden !! They reached out to me and straight up asked me if they could make me a theme song for these boys :'o and how could I say no to that?! They also have their commissions open right now too, so if you want your tmnt-theme-song dreams to come true or any other music you have in mind), their work is absolutely incredible and you should ABSOLUTELY go check em out 👀
AND thank you all so much for being so awesome and liking these boys so much ... more content of them on the way soon!
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celestialtarot11 · 2 months
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If you were a celeb, what would your vibe be? 💋🎬🌟 professions, careers etc 😍✨
Hi friends! Today we’ll be looking into something pretty fun! Your vibe as a celeb 💅🏻 enjoy and feel free to comment like and reblog 💗
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Pile 1: Hi there pile 1’s! 🤗🌟 For pile 1 I am picking up you would be a singer or a musician of some kind. I’m seeing RGB lighting in a concert, slow dancing from you itself, holding the microphone and it’s a jazz kind of vibe. Slow and sensual, but enough to grip you because of the tantalizing way you sing 🤍 some of ya’ll may have beautiful voices! For some of ya’ll you have an indie vibe and keep it fun, lively, and sometimes sensual in the concerts 💅🏻 I also see you guys would have an awesome costume designer capturing a retro vintage style of dressing. Very dreamy colors, makeup, and visuals that is alluring. I feel you’d have such an alluring appearance and you’re private as well, you may not post personal information to the public but mostly share your band, music, and travels 🤗🤍 I absolutely adore this pile because this is my kind of music 😍 if ya’ll had a band already I’d book tickets! You’d travel to popular places like LA and the West Coast, NYC, Boston, I also heard Oregon…? That may resonate for a few of you 😂 But you love your fans and you’d have a close relationship with them, and i feel as a celeb your music is incredibly important. I feel like you’d make a lot of music based on romance & love and capturing how that feels. I feel like you’d be the celeb to bring back that teenager in us and thats why fans love you! 🤗💗 you cultivate a powerful community because you bring together nostalgic feelings & memories. I feel like people would definitely admire you a lot, and they’d love if you held Q&A sessions so they got to know your history with music, how you started, and how you met your band 👏 You’d have such a sex appeal too because you appear dreamy, comfortable, radiant and yet private 💋✨ some of yall may not be into music but modeling too, and you’d have a very dreamy appearance and unique look! Thank you my pile 1’s! Feel free to support by liking commenting and reblogging 🤍🌟
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Pile 2: Hi there pile 2’s! We’ve got some influencers up in here in terms of health & wellness. Also fitness. I feel you guys would encourage your fans to eat healthier, and you’d do intensive research into healthier foods and holistic medicine 🌟💗 and as a result people really like you because you give them alternatives to medicine and popping pills 😂 also because I feel like you have a beautiful visual appearance. You appear put together, clean, professional and fun! You have a light hearted yet determined aura and people feel attracted to that 💅🏻✨ some of ya’ll might vlog & talk about your day, and people are invested in your workout routine, diet, and health! And also some of yall may have dogs so your fans would love them 🤗 I also feel like ya’ll would do wonderful creating your own wellness products and selling fitness related gear, people would love that! Especially those with disabilities that still want to work out. There’s something about you and how you create wellness products that are unique, they are designed for people that struggle or need help. I feel you hear your fans and you want to deliver results that are efficient and effective. I feel you’d work wonderfully with children too, and may pair up with organizations catered to the disabled and poverty. So people see you as incredibly humble, helpful, and supportive! You’re incredibly engaging with your fans & community and open to feedback! I feel like you’d be a great motivation speaker too, not because you’re aggressive but because you’re calm, efficient, and reliable in your tone. And you validate people’s experiences and feelings! People are drawn to your reassuring, gentle and determined personality 🤍🌟 you’d do great marketing fitness products too, or makeup products as well! If you’re into makeup you’d model and your fans love your reviews, they love how you do your makeup with precision and you’re unique with it too. You have innovative makeup ideas that people never thought of and it turns out beautiful 😍 I also feel you’d have something unique about your appearance and people cant forget it! It makes you stand out & beautiful 🤗💗 Overall you’d be open with your fans, inclusive, diverse and focus on educating them with health or tips for beauty 💗✨ so maybe you’re south asian and you want to make south asian makeup for those with olive undertones! That would be catering to a specific demographic! And people would greatly appreciate you because of how inclusive you are 🌟 thank you pile 2! Feel free to like comment and reblog for support 🤍
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Pile 3: Hi there pile 3! So happy you’re here 🤍🤗 Lets get on with it shall we? Some of yall may have a welsh accent 😂 anyway! I feel like yall have great jokes and would be known for your comedy. Maybe you blow up as a meme at first and then you get into acting 💅🏻 and people are taken away by your skills and effort! You are effortlessly hilarious and yet intentional, and you’d be recognized for it. I feel you have a lot of charisma as a celeb too, because you’re natural at getting people to like you. You’re very good at conversation and with one conversation you’d have someone gripped. Especially an interviewer. I see a lot of people interviewing you & wanting to get to know you. Huge audience, and you love it all! Sometimes anxious, but eventually you and your PR form great bonds so they know when to pull you out 😂 but anyway, I feel like you’re a natural at understanding what to do, how to do it, and you’re overall amazing! You’d do wonderful in movies and tv shows! Some of ya’ll could also be a runway model, and behind the scenes your humor is what gets you noticed and you go on to have your own page, where you sell to your own fans any product 💗 and I feel like you’d keep a healthy distance with your fans! I also feel you’d have such a striking appearance especially your eyes, theres something very different and unique about the color or intensity. It leaves interviewers forgetting what they said ���� but they definitely are hooked! You have a lot of sex appeal and you may not realize it, but people do. People also create sexual fantasies of you in their mind & they daydream about you. You could take care of your body a lot and people admire that! Thank you pile 3 feel free to comment like or reblog! 💗🌟 thank yall so much!
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Paid Readings 🤍✨
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ahxu-laowen · 1 year
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I see you're a GL enthusiast and others have often tagged you in GL related content... As someone who has consumed a little BL and is curious about quality GL stories, do you have like 2 or 3 recs for me? Thank you!
hi!! i'm so glad you asked *pulls out a presentation on all the gl crumbs i've collected over the years*
we don't have a lot (yet!!!!) it's mostly miniseries, short films and side couples but i'll try my best to put together a list of my personal picks hope you'll be able to find something you like <3
first of all here's some of the longer / higher production stuff we've got
Sleep With Me
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Philippines, 6 eps, iWantTFC and GagaOOLala
tw ableism
100/10 can't possibly recommend it enough. a beautiful and sweet story, not too heavy but still complex, the actresses have amazing chemistry that made me all giggly, disability rep, high quality everything. oh and the screenwriter&director is sapphic herself!!
(if the other options don't work for you or you want to make gifs you can download the episodes here)
Fragrance of The First Flower
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Taiwan, 6 eps, GagaOOLala
tw homophobia
great acting, writing, cinematography, music, created by a sapphic woman, one of the main actresses is openly bi BUT it has a sad ending (sorry for the spoiler) so if that's something you avoid this show might not be for you
The Handmaiden
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Korea, movie, Netflix, Prime, Apple TV
tw graphic violence, abuse
a wlw classic, absolute masterpiece, has a surprisingly happy ending. highly recommend if you haven't watched it already
Couple of Mirrors
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China, 12 eps, youtube
tw murder, guns
based on a gl manhua but it's china so the show is censored meaning that there's no explicit declaration of romantic love. however it's all still very obvious and i love this couple dearly, they have a v interesting dynamic. and xu youyi is one of my favorite characters of all time, what a woman. the ending is ??? but there's some hope for a second season
now onto the miniseries
Girlfriend Project Day 1
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Korea, 4 eps, youtube
fake dating, enemies to lovers, super cute. very short but the second season has been announced 🥳🥳
you can also find a mv starring the lead actresses here
Nevertheless (side couple)
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Korea, 10 eps
don't watch the whole show you really don't need that just watch the soljiwan cut it can stand on its own as a miniseries (i've watched it here i think it's a really nice cut)
best friends to lovers, mutual pining, absolutely delicious. had me crying screaming throwing up
My Fairy Ghost
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Japan, 4 eps, youtube
romance between two artists, one alive and the other not so much. don't worry though this has the happiest ending!!!!
Magic of Zero: Zero Photography
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Thailand, 1 ep, youtube
tw body image issues
if you're a bl fan you've probably already watched bad buddy (if you haven't you really should). this is a sequel about the gl side couple from that series but it can stand alone. it's an incredibly cute story about established girlfriends with a fantasy element. it should be obvious from my blog how obsessed i am with these girls aksghsksks
Out of Breath
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Korea, 3 eps, youtube
a sweet story about two women who met on a dating app. tbh i don't remember much about this apart from the fact that i liked it
She Makes My Heart Flutter
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Korea, 5 eps, youtube
from the same director as out of breath. a story about two lesbians, niece and aunt, navigating their queer lives. an awesome sapphic friend group, multiple romantic subplots. it's currently airing so tune in <3
Chinese miniseries and short films
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i'm putting them all into one category because there's a lot of them but they're all rather short. some of the longer ones are legend of yunqian, legend of yunze, led astray by love, the vampires, a practical guide to being a superstar's assistant. because they're so short the stories are generally too fast-paced and the production is not high by any means but they're all so beautiful and cute and i enjoy them a lot so i decided to include them in the list. you can find all of the ones i mentioned and more here and here
(the screenshot is from the short film the fox spirit and the little priest you can find it on youtube)
i'm sure i've forgotten something but here's the list for now, enjoy 💗 tell me what you think if you watch anything i'm curious 👀 sorry for such a late reply as you can see i got a bit carried away....
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my-autism-adhd-blog · 4 months
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Autism & Being Childish?
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Autism and Being 'Childish'?
Many traits and things that are common among autistic people are often seen as 'childish' in the neurotypical world.
In reality, these things are incredibly important for the wellbeing of autistic adults and children and helpful in preventing meltdowns/shutdowns/burnout.
They are not something that should be stopped and not at all something that prevents anyone to be trustworthy/ responsible/ amazing at their job, etc.
Also, there is nothing to be ashamed of, because these things being helpful for many are totally awesome.
Some examples
1. having comfort items and being attached to them strongly.
These can be really helpful in overwhelming situations at home, and in public.
2. having 'chidish' special interests.
Special interests, whatever they are, are so much fun and super important for many autistic people.
3. unique fashion rules that might contain 'childish' elements.
For me, it's absolutely true, because in the neurotypical world, colorful things, and cute cartoon figures are often seen as childish, but for me, these are essential when going outside.
4. having a sensory space and playing with toys regularly, like having soft plushies, playing with fidget toys, lining up objects, being mesmerized by pretty lights, etc. Again, these have an important role in autistic self care
5. the autistic joy
The autistic enthusiasm and marveling at the wonders and beauty of the world, and also the way one might express the autistic joy, like jumping around, flapping hands, clapping, etc, these are also mainly associated with children in the neuritypical world, but I take it as a compliment, because for me, these are the probably the best things in being autistic.
Lil Penguin Studios/Autism Happy Place
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nyxire · 2 years
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There's a webtoon on popular web comic app webtoon and I love and think it's absolutely fantastic and I spent like 4 months catching up to it but I also stopped reading it like a year and a half ago because it was more convoluted than Lost and making my brain hurt
#by the time i caught up and a few months later i stopped understanding what the fuckity fuck was going on#don't get me wrong it's an absolutely amazing webtoon but also just really complicated#i rlly want to read it again but inorder to understand i'd have to reread all of it#but uhm. there's like 360 something chapter and chapters are rlly long and the thing is still ongoing#so yeha#it's not tower of god or whatever. i actually have not read that one although i planned to at somepoint but i gave up on that one#kasin is my favorite character bc he is trying but also a bit of a bitch and we love him for that#im still subscribed to it so randomly i will just press on it and read the latest episode and be like ^^#have absolutely no idea what the fuck is going on but enjoy it anyways#ALSO TEN#LOVE TEN#he is so funny. and his partner. pink haired lady who is awesome and i also can't remember the name or right this instant#+ ofc hiasen who is lovely#it's so incredibly underrated but such a gem of a story.#back to kasin. i love him bc he is like so purposefully annoying. he is very calm and collected but if someone tells him to do something#he will immediately do the opposite. that bitch <3#the last time i somewhat understood what was going on and was actively keeping up#ten n kasin were fighting some crazy bitch and i thought they were both fucking dead#OH WAIT holy shit between typing that last tag i read a chapter and it said that the current chapter is actually the beginning of the end ?#i do not have much time before this goes on fast pass holy shit#also i rlly hope that while i gone they dived more into ran kasin and jellyfish dudes backstory bc i think that was rlly fun#i mean probably not but i can hope
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colealexart · 5 months
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story time! i met the cr cast this past weekend at mcm london and they were the kindest people imaginable, but my interaction with laura and marisha was just. incomprehensibly sweet and the best thing to ever happen to me.
first up was laura. my friends izzy (@wvearp) and abby (@overnighttosunflowers) went before me in the queue and they got my art signed by her. when they did, she said “oh, best art” and they told her that they were here with the artist. she immediately was like “what?! where?!” and started looking around frantically. i was standing just to the side and i waved awkwardly and she was like “NO WAY! YOU!! i favourite this shit on twitter ALL THE TIME!” which i find hilarious because yeah, i freak out a little every time she does.
when it got to my turn, i said hello and asked her how she was doing. she did not answer my question and instead said “cole, are you kidding me? these are gorgeous” about the two prints i handed to her. (the one pictured and a different one i got signed.) she said she remembers seeing this after the episode aired and i was like “yeah, it airs at 3am here so i drew this in a frantic, sleep deprived stupor at 7am” and she said “you did it so fast, i remember! i sent it to marisha! people are SO QUICK with the fanart, you guys are insane.”
after she signed the print, she held onto it for a moment and just sat and admired it, before looking at me with the BIGGEST smile and saying “you are seriously the best. thank you.” and i don’t know how to handle sincerity so i handed her the dice i got for her. she was so excited about them and immediately rolled the d20 and got a 10 (edit: i misremembered, she got a 3 lol). i then asked if we could play rollies and she beat me. i got a 5 and laura got a 7. i said i’m sorry they’re not rolling well and she was like “it’s fine, they just need charging up!”
i also got a selfie too, but the guy helping her at the table took the photo for us instead of me trying to take it because i suck at taking selfies. she gave me a really tight side hug and when it was done, she thanked me again with the biggest smile.
i also didnt realize until afterwards but instead of writing a character quote, laura wrote “you are everything” on my autograph 😭
next was the group photo op. as we walked up i said hi again to laura and she immediately recognized me from before. she grabbed onto my shoulders and literally spun me around to marisha and was frantically saying “marisha marisha, this is the person that does the amazing imodna art!” but there was a lot going on and marisha was looking at me with the most bewildered expression, until she eventually understood what laura was saying but we had to rush to take the photo. laura held onto my arm and marisha leaned against me and i didn’t realize until afterwards but liam and tal also had their hands on my shoulders lol. it was A Lot. i told marisha i would probably be heading to her autograph queue next so i’d see her there and she was like “awesome, i cant wait!”
so after that, i met marisha. i was probably the most nervous to meet her because she’s just so cool and intimidating but in reality she is just so warm and has such a calming presence about her. she was like “cole, good to see you again!” and i handed her the same imodna print that i had laura sign. she said “ohh, aww this is amazing! this is what laura was talking about, i was so confused!”
then we talked a bit about the live show because her voice was hoarse and i asked her how she was feeling. she said it was just her voice that was gone, but we agreed that it was absolutely worth it because the live show was incredible. i also congratulated her on the how do you wanna do this, then gave her the dice i got for her and we played rollies too. we both got an 18 at first and when we rerolled, she beat me with another 18 to my 16. then she was like “oh these roll really well, i’m definitely gonna use these!”
we took our photo together and afterwards she said “thank you for your art and everything. seriously, you’re so talented” while rubbing my shoulder, and then i headed off to join ashley’s queue.
i’m probably gonna make a separate post about meeting ashley and sam. i just wanted to write this down mostly to immortalize on my blog. i expected them to be kind but i did NOT expect to feel so loved and appreciated. laura was about as excited as i was, and made me feel so special. (this is also a pretty small thing but i dont think i pass very well, so the fact that laura said ‘person’ and didn’t misgender me meant a hell of a lot too.)
i did bring extra prints to give to them as a gift but was overwhelmed and forgot lol
anyway, that’s it! for anyone wondering if the critical role cast are as kind in person as they seem online, they absolutely are and then some. i’ll never forget this past week.
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