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sammysdewysensitiveeyes · 2 years

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Character: Toad

give me a character and I'll answer

do I like them: I want to wrap him up in a blanket and keep him safe (yes)

5 good qualities:

1. I want to say "loyalty" but Toad's loyalty towards people like Magneto is rather unhealthy and marred by Erik's history of abuse towards him. But that's also not really Toad's fault? I think I'd still see it as a positive, because here is this little dude willing to devote his heart and soul to someone, it's not his fault that the first object of his devotion treated him like garbage. But he does need some therapy, big time.

2. Intelligence - Toad has been well established to be very, very smart, and it drives me nuts that some characters still treat him like a moron. He was completely wasted as a janitor in Wolverine and the X-Men, they should have had him teaching science or engineering.

3. Willing to help others - Toad isn't always the nicest fellow, but there have been several instances of him going out of his way to help people. He takes the Brotherhood to Empyrean's island to help Legacy Virus-stricken Pyro, even though there's no real gain for him to do so (it's not like Pyro is likely to get better and rejoin the team). He helps Lorelei after she gets beaten up during the 198. He saves Quentin Quire from falling to his death in WatXM, and later goes to Hellfire just to help Husk and the other mutants who have defected. He also apparently agreed to take the fall for Wanda's death and go to the Pit for a crime he didn't commit, in the very badly written ToM. (Free Toad, btw.)

4. Willing to learn - there are versions of Toad who has his shit together and he usually comes across as a very well-rounded person with a lot of intellectual curiosity, like in House of M, where he has written a book, and AoA, where he is a Shakespearean actor. Toad also took it upon himself to learn mechanics just by studying the Stranger's devices. He had a shitty time in formal education, he was branded as "stupid" from a young age, but Toad has taken it upon himself to study and learn new things, with no real help from anyone (and active discouragement from people like Magneto who repeatedly calls him a moron). If Toad had proper therapy and access to education, I could imagine him as being similar to 90's cartoon Beast - an intellectual with knowledge of many subjects.

5. Cool powers - despite jokes about Toad having crappy powers, the dude actually has a ton of abilities. His powerful legs could easily kick someone's head off, he can mind control frogs, he's got the prehensile tongue, he can spit up acidic gunk, he secretes both mind-control pheremones and a paralyzing toxin. Toad has got a whole grab bag of abilities, and if writers ever let him get his shit together and stop treating him like a clown, he could be a force to be reckoned with. (Unfortunately, every time one writer tries, the next writer will slap him back down to "loser" status very quickly.)

3 bad qualities:

1. Toad can be a very nasty person, and was even willing to kill Karl Lyko's girlfriend Tanya to transform Lyko's back into Sauron for his Brotherhood. He is more than capable of doing some very shitty things, especially when he's trying to establish himself as a big bad guy. He can also be very vindictive.

2. Obsessive - in particular, Toad fixates on Wanda early on, to the point of attacking her and Vision when she is with the Avengers. He also starts fixating on Husk after she shows him simple kindness during WatXM. He's much nicer to Husk, and actually rescues her from the Hellfire club when her skin mutation is causing her instability, but it's still not a very healthy relationship.

3. Fawning/servile - Toad latches onto authority figures like Magneto, and becomes completely devoted to them. He will let Magneto abuse, berate and hit him, and still come crawling back, and will put down others on the team as much as possible to establish himself as Magneto's special favorite. (Toad spent a lot of early Brotherhood stories tattling on Wanda and Pietro.) To some extent, I feel like this isn't entirely his fault, it's due to mental illness and trauma and abuse. Toad fawns over authority figures because he desperately wants to be loved, and he wants to see others punished so that he isn't the target. But it's still a bad quality of his, and he needs massive amounts of therapy.

favourite episode/etc:

-The first X-Men Forever storyline, where Toad, Iceman, Jean, Mystique and Juggernaut time travel. Some good Toad development there.

-Toad leading his own Brotherhood in the 90's. It showed his nastier side, and he was unfortunately often treated as a joke (some writers try to elevate Toad by showing him as this strategic genius, and other writers immediately tear him down by having his team get their asses kicked easily and repeatedly). BUT it was still Toad in a leadership position, very different from his previous characterization.

-Toad in The 198, where he is just this very cynical, world-weary kind of guy, just very fed up with all this shit.

-That time Spiderman saved Toad from committing suicide, and he started trying to help him and wound up teaming up with Spider-kid and Frogman to be a group of crime-fighters.

-House of M and Age of Apocalypse Toad - both very competent and mentally healthy, showing how impressive Toad can be if he just gets some encouragement and therapy.

-Toad in WatXM - they mostly treat him like a joke to a frustrating degree, but the storyline with Husk treats him very sympathetically. (Also, how completely incompetent was the Jean Grey school staff when they all totally miss how Husk is falling apart? She's sitting there at teacher meetings just spacing out, and no one notices she needs help?)

-That one scene where Toad warns Rogue about how easy it is to get caught up in hero worship of Magneto, and Rogue should have immediately responded by sending Morty to therapy immediately.

otp: Toad/self esteem. I really don't know who would be good for Toad romantically. Toad/Husk wasn't a bad pairing, but it was still really unhealthy for both of them, and I think they'd need to try again when they are both in a better place mentally.

Also apparently one of the Mastermind sisters was once shown having a secret crush on Toad? I think they should go for it - if Martinique or possibly Regan wants the slimy boy, she should have him. Whatever makes them both happy.

brotp: I want Toad and Husk to at least be friends on Krakoa. Also maybe Toad and Blob? They've hung out together in a few Brotherhoods. I would honestly love for Toad to have a mechanically-inclined friend, like maybe he and Forge could work on things together. Or maybe Toad and Phantazia, who needs to make her reappearance in the comics anyway.

ot3: Toad/self-esteem/a loving partner, in a mutually respectful relationship.

notp: Toad/Wanda or Toad/Magneto, for obvious reasons.

best quote: "I ain't the kind of toad that turns into a prince when some beautiful lady kisses him. I just stay a toad."

head canon:

-Despite his generally terrible childhood in England, he sometimes nostalgically misses little things about the country. Like, a lot of his memories are tinged with bitterness and trauma, but sometimes he gets hungry for a Jammie Dodger or something. He generally has good memories of British snacks and candy, those are some of his few pleasant memories of the orphanage (assuming he could eat them before other children took them away).

-On that note, I imagine Toad being one of those types who has trouble saving food and feels the need to eat everything as quickly as possible, for fear that it will get taken away. He never got to easily keep anything for himself, so if you give him a box of chocolates, he'll probably scarf it down quickly rather than saving it, because he's got that anxiety that anything he tries to save will disappear.

-Similarly, I think Toad doesn't really hang into possessions. He's always had a pretty nomadic existence, he's used to having next to nothing and living a chaotic, unpredictable life. I could imagine Toad either not giving a shit about owning things (because he can so easily lose them) or else going the other way and becoming a bit of a hoarder.

-I think Toad both enjoys, and is very good at video games. They give him a relaxing outlet for stress, and they boost his self-esteem because he can play well. He actually starts to make a few friends over voice chat while playing online, and it's easier for him because they're not talking in person, and being a skilled player means that his online team-mates are generally very positive and friendly towards him. Maybe he starts posting some Youtube speedrun videos.

#toad #mortimer toynbee

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tozettastone · 2 years

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Where are they now: "The Other Things We Never Knew About Frodo's Soulmate", say ... 50 years later?

For the 'where are they now?' ask meme

Okay. That's this fic, which was written for a specific challenge and I admit ends without concluding. It's a Frodo/Sauron soul mate au that could have gone on forever, basically. This is your opportunity to go read it if you haven't, because I'm spoiling it completely below. :)

The journey itself ends with Frodo meeting Sauron in the light of day, instead of in his dreamscape, for the first time. It's a very dramatic meeting: Sauron is degraded from what he once was, accursed. Looking at him is like staring into the sun—and not in a dazzling blaze of glory way, more in a 'deadly presence that will blind you' way. His skin is burnt black as night, and cracked through with lines of radiant fire that never cease to burn, and in his ruined face his eyes are pale, lucid and terrible.

He is... big. Very big. 'Little wonder he's a nightmarish battle presence,' is probably what you'd think, if you were Merry or Pippin, and you did not already know he was very much a fallen angel.

Frodo is by contrast a mundane creature: a short, plump hobbit in a worn waistcoat, still dusty from the road (although the road has, it must be said, gone easier than it did in canon!) and he drops the ring into the palm of the Dark Lord Sauron's terrible outstretched hand and says, "I'm fairly certain this belongs to you."

(Regrettably, Aragorn is left with his small army hammering at the Black Gates before the valley of Udun, and instead of greeting the full might of Sauron's army there (and either dying horribly or surviving by the grace of Frodo managing to destroy the Ring) he's met by 3.6 orcs with a stick, all of whom are cranky about missing the victory party.)

So, 49 years on from this. (This was not a short journey.)

The ensuing war is a crucible for the whole of Middle Earth, but Sauron at his full capacity, with Saruman at his side (do you think Saruman would become a balrog, eventually, or has that ship sailed?), is an overwhelming force. Half the elves have already gone, and men have short memories and an endless stream of wants and needs.

So after the first thirty years, a war that the elves would have fought til the last bitter veteran is lost, because... well, men age. They die out. Your rage at a guy who killed your great grandfather isn't quite the same as your rage at a guy who killed your brother. It's just how it is.

The world where Sauron wins is... an unlovely one. It's a world where the natural world loses, for sure. Fanghorn is a shadow of its former self, the great trees cut down to fuel the ever-hungry fires of industry. The Ents are gone, dead, silent, or fled. More than one balrog works in Moria now, corrupted maiar overseeing orcs and men and dwarves all commingled, working in long hard shifts. (Gandalf has to go for sure. There's really only room for maiar who do what they're told in Middle Earth now. He can go back to Manwe and Nienna or be locked away somewhere lightless. His call.)

There's a lot of suffering.

There are wonders wrought by Sauron, too, though—although the free people of Middle Earth would weep to hear you say it. He learnt his craft at the knee of Aule. He still has a tendency to strive for order and consistency over death and chaos. His engineering work is precise and beautiful and brutally functional. His magic is terrible and brilliant. The logistics of Mordor are a marvel that make even the dwarves grind their teeth.

And there are patches of the world that are still green. Hobbits and men and dwarves still need to eat, after all: much of Eriador remains farmland, largely untouched by conflict, although there's plenty of problems with the increased demand on their production. But that, too, is resolved by industry and logistics (isn't it? well. no. not always. but 19 years after a war like this one, the population isn't what it was, either).

I suppose I should talk about Frodo. Frodo's fea persists through simple fact of them being soulmates, which puts the hroa in an awkward position. By 50 years after his adventure, this is extremely evident—he's a hundred now, and hobbits should be coming to the ends of their lives at a hundred or so, perhaps a little older. Frodo is not. But his body is failing in several ways, and twisting to accommodate his spirit in others. Sauron is... not pleased.

Quite from the inconvenience, hobbits are an earthy, fleshly bunch, and they like things that feel nice: hot water, spring grass, sunshine, blankets, good food, sex. You know. The important things.

I think they'll probably solve it eventually though. And then everything will persist in this state... until and unless Sauron figures out at last how to pass the door of night, where Morgoth was banished after his last defeat. I'm not sure if he'd open it if he could. But then... I'm not sure he could resist the temptation.

#ask #thriceandonce #where are they now #lotr #ask meme

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warrioreowynofrohan · 3 years

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I think the thing that gets me about tolkien writing is that like…Gondorian (dunedian, Númenorean) crimes against their fellow humans are never paid for. The Easterlings and Haradrim are treated poorly by the narrative as distinctly evil or less deserving of…basic human consideration than the dunedain? And later on in the appendix, we are shown Eonwe and aragorn waging war with the Easterlings and preforming expansionist actions.

I think a good part of my personal criticisms with tolkien is that he doesn’t go far enough with the war is bad, and he never says “gondorian empire building is bad” Like he can have Faramir can bemoan the state of gondor all day, but never once implies maybe so many Easterlings and Haradrim wouldn’t hate them if their ancestors hadn’t taken them as slaves and colonized middle earth? It never crosses his mind that his people have always been the bad guys not just becayse sauron manipulations but because of their own actions. Hell? Their bloodiest civil war was over the fact their king was a son of a “inferior” human women, and people were mad about It. Like sauron is gone, that’s great but where are the self examination that they need to have? They need to confront their own superiority complex that their ancestors (the edain?) Almost never had. They need to recognize they are HUMAN and mortal and flawed just like everyone else left in middle earth, their .00009 elf blood doesn’t make them special, the same worms will eat them too

But they never do. and it’s disappointing.

Yes, there’s no real grappling with the legacy of Númenor as far as its relation to Third-Age Gondoran politics. I’m not sure whether you mean Eómer rather than Eönwe given the rest of the post (I find the fate of the Easterlings in the War of Wrath rather tragic, but I think it’s a product of circumstance and the mutual incomprehensibility of the Valar and Men, and don’t think the Valar could have really done any differently than they did).

I think it’s mostly the product of the author - Tolkien does consider the Númenoreans to be special, he just thinks they used their specialness the wrong the way. Yet at the same time, he does recognize the evil of their pride in their lineage - the side in the civil war that you mention who are opposed to their king marrying someone not from Gondor are the side who are in the wrong, and who lose and become the first Corsairs of Umbar. Tolkien writes that the gradually decreasing lifespan of the Gondorians was “no doubt due above all to Middle-earth itself,” not to lineage.

And another element is that the deeds of the Númenoreans were a vastly long time ago (as in, it’s on the level with the idea of people of our present day going to war out of hostility towards ancient Assyria), so I don’t think the characterization that Sauron operated by stirring up old hatreds among the Easterlings and Haradrim is altogether invalid. And the Gondorians would likely not see those deeds of the Númenoreans as their own, given that (as stated in the Akallabeth), “the Elf-friends had small part” in the colonization of Middle-earth, and were later oppressed by the kings of Númenor, and Gondor is descended from the Elf-friends. And as a consequence of their imperialism “the lives of the Kibfs of the House of Elros waned”, so it’s not something that was overlooked. That said, Tolkien also treats the grievances of the Dunlendings, who were forced from their lands when Gondor ‘gave’ them to the Rohirrim, as equally invalud, so althogether it’s a perspective of the narrative that I certainly don’t like.

Regarding expansionist actions in the Fourth Age, I’m guessing you’re referring to this passage at the end of the Rohan section of Appendix A:

For though Sauron had passed, the hatreds and evils that he had bred had not died, and the King of the West had many enemies to subdue before the White Tree could grow in peace. And wherever King Elessar went to war King Éomer went with him; and beyond the Sea of Rhûn and on the far fields of the South the thunder of the cavalry of the Mark was heard, and the White Horse upon Green flew in many winds until Éomer grew old.

So yes, I agree that it’s generally disappointing.

If you’re the same person who sent the other Asks about Men - you’ve got a lot of good and interesting thoughts! why not start your own tumblr blog?

#tolkien #gondor #númenor #rohan #imperialism

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morwensteelsheen · 3 years

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I struggle with figuring out what the expectations are for aristocratic marriage in Gondor and Rohan. One thing I’ve toyed about with in my head is treating LOTR as not just unreliably narrated, but as super unreliably narrated, and taking ‘the Steward and the King’ not as gospel, but essentially as a bit of PR/marketing. Because wow, isn’t it really, really convenient that the Steward of Gondor/second most powerful man in the realm gets married to the most powerful woman of the Riddermark, Gondor’s closest ally? Isn’t that a little too convenient? What if Frodo just copies down the press release given to him by Faramir and instead of being this stunning high romance, he and Éowyn are basically just a run-of-the-mill political marriage?

(Obviously I don’t believe this fully, but it is an interesting thought.)

Here’s where it becomes harder to justify though, and here’s why I’m really confused about how marriage works for both Gondor and Rohan’s nobility.

If political marriage were a thing in either of them, it stands to reason that it’s quite strange that neither Boromir nor Théodred are married with kids. The appendices say that Denethor ‘married late’ for having married Finduilas when he was forty-six, but when Boromir dies he’s forty-one. So he’s not far off at all. Théodred is the same age as Boromir, and we know that Théoden was married to Elfhild at least by the time that he was thirty, though he probably married her before that. So Théodred’s really late.

So not only do neither of the heirs have kids, they’re not even married. Even if they didn’t have kids, you would think that, if political marriages were the norm, they’d be shipped off post-haste, right? Dol Amroth was secured in its loyalty to MT through Denethor marrying Finduilas (and obviously the whole happy go luck proto-nationalism shit that’s going on), and it seems like the rest of the major provinces are mostly in line, so why not use a marriage to secure the alliance with the Mark? I would have Boromir married off to Éowyn ASAP since there are no women to marry off to Théodred. But the fact that that doesn’t happen is interesting, I think. And also really complicates my HC that Éomer/Lothíriel is mostly a political thing, tbh.

It’s all even more interesting in light of Faramir’s line in TTT where he’s explaining why the Kings of Gondor fell apart:

Childless lords sat in aged halls musing on heraldry...

Because, like, buddy, you are a childless lord sitting in an aged hall. And not only that, but since his brother was unmarried and childless before his death, he was probably always going to become the Steward at some point anyways, even if only briefly. So it’s not like he gets to claim amnesty via spare-status, because until the moment Boromir had kids (which he never did), he was constantly in secondary heir mode. So??? why wasn’t Faramir married off either? My dude was THIRTY-SIX during the war. He could’ve had fuckin hunners of kids by that point, but you’re telling me everyone was just gucci with him maintaining bachelor status?

Also, Faramir pointing it out does have the effect of politicising marriage somewhat. We know that Faramir’s somewhat out of step politically with the rest of Gondor, at least that in he appears to be very, very obsessed with bringing back the Númenor stuff and criticising Gondor over the last five hundred or so years. So if he’s diagnosed this childless lords problem as a problem that led to Gondor’s decay, he’s probably doing it because others don’t really see it that way. ‘Others’ here could be either Boromir (see the bottom of this post) or it could be Gondorians generally, we can’t know. Either way, Lord Faramir, thirty-six years old and unmarried, seems to think that lords not ensuring there were heirs to their houses was a problem. That contradiction/incidental hypocrisy is noteworthy!

I’ve typically taken this in my fics as an indication that the war was quite an intense and cataclysmic thing even before the official War of the Ring starts, and that all of these guys are way, way too busy dealing with that to consider marrying, but that opens up the question — when did things get so dire that securing the future of the ruling houses got deprioritised? Sauron openly declared himself in TA2951, but twenty-six-ish years later both Denethor and Théoden get married, so marriage is still at play in ~TA2976. Not a huge amount happens between 2976 and 3018 in explicit canon. We know that Elrond recalls Arwen from Lórien in 3009 because everything east of the Misty Mountains is becoming dangerous. By this time Boromir and Théodred are 31 and Faramir is 26, which made me wonder if it would be reasonable to have expected any of them to be married at that point. I did some quick math to see how old the title-holders were when they were married, stopping at the fifth generation back to accommodate Thorondir, who was the first Steward to not crack a century of life. Here’s what I’ve got:

(Where an actual wedding year wasn’t given, I based it on the year their eldest child was born.)

(Worth noting that Denethor’s not that much older than Ecthelion likely was when he married, so the ‘married old’ remark could instead be a reference to when Gondorians got married generally, not specifically to the Númenórean lot.)

There’s a chance all these guys got married way, way earlier and just spent ages childless, but… I sort of doubt that. Also I’m doing this based on what I can access from my laptop, so both HoME and PoME might contradict me or give more specific dates. If that’s the case — sorry!

It is interesting that if we accept HoME’s dating of Faramir and Éowyn’s wedding as TA3020 as canon, then Faramir (married at 37) is actually younger than the average for the previous five generations of Stewards. So is Éomer, because by marrying Lothíriel in 3021 he’s actually just getting in early by a a year or so.

Regardless, it makes statistical sense that neither Boromir nor Faramir are married by 3009, though Théodred is sort of pushing it. Certainly by 3018 when he dies he’s really taking the piss, but Boromir is still sort of in the clear (but getting up there), and Faramir’s kind of fine.

We know, at least, that there’s a canonical acknowledgement of Boromir’s bachelor status, per Appendix A:

Rather he was a man after the sort of King Eärnur of old, taking no wife and delighting chiefly in arms.

No accounting for Théodred, though based on Faramir’s bitching about Rohan and Gondor becoming more alike, you could probably chalk it up to the same thing as Boromir. I note, however, that Théodred’s need is slightly more urgent because in absence of an heir from Théodred, the throne would then pass to Éomer. I think we might reasonably assume that he wouldn’t have a problem with this (Théoden might have, given how effective Wormtongue’s manoeuvring was), but we can’t know for certain.

Worth pointing out as well that Elphir’s son Alphros is born in 3017, so it’s not like nobody is getting it on.

I was interested in what the numbers for the ladies would look like, and obviously this is complicated by the fact that there’s like twenty named human women and even fewer with birth dates/marriage dates, but here’s what the table looks like:

(Because so many of the women we know of are women who crossed between Rohan and Gondor, I put them in columns based on their birth culture, not where they married into.)

Also here’s some fuel for the age gap discourse:

(Can you tell I’m procrastinating my dissertation???)

Anyways, outside of some apparent liberalism towards the ol’ begetting of heirs, there’s not a huge amount of information floating around to help us understand how or if marriage was understood politically in Rohan and Gondor. You get bits and pieces (Aragorn’s ‘no niggard are you, Éomer’ comment at Éowyn and Faramir’s trothplighting, for example, Wormtongue being after Éowyn, for another), but nothing extended or particularly explicit.

Just one of those things, really…

#just having some Thoughts really #lotr #long post #also lmao just realised that alphros being born in 3017 buggers my AFTA timeline for fuck’s sake

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dolce-peach · 3 years

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Aragorn x reader. Aragorn meets reader when he randomly finds reader fighting orcs in the forest or something. Asks her to join them. Mutual pining. IDK just some cute awkward Aragorn please

just a feeling

pairing: aragorn x reader

warnings: fluff, slight mentions of blood

a/n: a bit short but i had a lotta fun while writing this 🥺 hope you guys enjoy!

permanent taglist: @kaitlynmalikisnotonfire @just-another-loki-fanblog

** TO MAKE A REQUEST -- please check the status in my bio **

masterlist

----

To say the entire Fellowship was uneasy was an understatement. As time slowly passed, every member grew weary by the end of each day, crawling to sleep with no more than a grunt or murmur of “goodnight”.

Aragorn watched as Frodo’s usually gentle demeanor waned, revealing uneasy glances and the occasional look of distaste and suspicion. The ranger couldn’t deny he felt the Ring calling to him, but he knew he couldn’t succumb if the fate of Middle Earth was in their hands. Instead he kept watch over the Halfling, providing small conversations of relief every now and then.

Frodo loved to talk about the forests surrounding his home. He would swing from the branches of the trees as a young child and read against the trunk in the shade as life began to lose its innocent glow.

Perhaps it made Aragorn think of his distant past. He never knew, as those forbidden memories were kept locked away somewhere deep in his heart. He turned away from that part of himself long ago, and now with the endless confirmations of his lineage...

A roar echoed through the woods nearby, shooting Aragorn to his feet. His sword was already drawn, the rest of the company barely getting to their feet.

“What was that?” Frodo whispered.

“I’ll find out,” Aragorn promised him. He placed a hand on the hobbit’s shoulder. “Stay here with the others. It’ll be alright.”

With a nod to Legolas, the ranger stode out into the wood, taking in the air as he walked.

Everything reeked of the foul stench of orc blood. There were dark drops splattered on the trunks of trees and fallen leaves. Aragorn gripped his sword tighter. Whoever had done this was a likely to be a greater foe, if that was possible.

Before he could react, a sword crossed his, pushing past the blade to point threateningly at Aragorn’s throat.

“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t slay you where you stand,” you said. “Who are you?”

To say you were beautiful was an understatement. You did not carry the ethereal beauty of an elf nor the poise of a princess. Yet as you stood in front of him with your messily tied hair, blood-stained robes, and a smirk of victory, Aragorn was sure there was nothing in all of Middle Earth that could compete.

Legolas lowered his bow, studying the large pile of orcs in your wake. “You did this?”

You scoffed. “Who else?” The tip of your sword was dangerously close to Aragorn’s Adam’s apple. “You never anwered my question.” You sized him up quickly. “Ranger.”

“You answered your own question,” Aragorn chuckled, sheathing his sword. “Now my question is, who are you?”

“Someone passing through,” you said nonchalantly while lowering your blade. “I’ve been tracking this pack from Isengard for a few days. It was when they began speaking about conquering Middle Earth for Sauron that I decided to act.”

Aragorn’s brow furrowed. “So the rumors are true. Saruman has become Sauron’s puppet.”

“What do you know of this?” you questioned while cleaning your sword.

Aragorn exchanged a quick look with Legolas, the elf giving him a slight raise of an eyebrow. “We are trying to destroy the One Ring, Sauron’s ring, and put an end to this once and for all.”

“Sounds like a brave thing to do,” you mused, sheathing your sword. You whistled your horse over.

“You don’t care?” he concluded quietly.

“I do care,” you said, stroking your horse’s mane. “I do not care for the Ring. That is all.” You sighed heavily. “It has turned many hearts astray and destroyed too many lands.”

“Then help us,” the words left Aragorn’s lips easily.

You laughed. “I’m sure your companions will be safe, given that you were sent to protect them.” Seeing his puzzled look, you pursed your lips in a knowing smile. “Do not think I don’t know who you are, Aragorn, son of Arathorn. Word of your actions has travelled fast throughout Middle Earth.”

Aragorn blinked before looking away. He knew in his mind it would be valuable to have you included in the Fellowship, but was he doing it for the right reasons?

You clearly had no problem protecting yourself. It was obvious you were strong and good-willed. He had no idea about your background nor where you came from, but he had a feeling about you, something he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

And it was bothering him.

He lay a hand on the hilt of his sword. “We...we could really use your help.”

“I’m sure you could,” you chuckled. “I’m just waiting for you to ask me properly.”

You were definitely not like any woman Aragorn had ever met. He never thought he’d succumb to such an odd request, but you had him under your spell.

Aragorn scoffed before gazing at you curiously. “What is your name, milady?”

“Y/N,” you said. “And call me ‘milady’ again, and you will not live to see another day.”

He nodded with a small laugh. “Will you help us, Y/N?”

You smiled. “I’ll do my best, Aragorn.”

As the three of you exited the forest, Legolas pulled Aragorn aside. They watched as you walked up to introduce yourself to Gimli, Boromir, and the four hobbits.

“In all the years I have known you...” Legolas trailed off, seeing Aragorn’s eyes on you. “You truly are hopeless, my friend.”

Aragorn cleared his throat, adjusting his cloak. “When was the last time you saw anyone take on a squadron of Isengard orcs by themselves and live to tell the tale?”

“You know I don’t mean that,” Legolas groaned. “Never mind. You always have a reason for everything you do.”

“I do,” he replied.

The elf sighed as his gaze turned towards your direction. “You think she is beautiful.”

There was a long moment before Aragorn exhaled. “Yes.”

Legolas sighed, rolling his eyes. “This is going to be quite frustrating to watch, then,” he said as he walked towards the camp.

Aragorn furrowed his brow. “Wait, what do you mean?”

“If anything I’ve heard about men pining after unreachable women is true, then we’re all doomed,” the elf said. “Why don’t you just confess your feelings now, rather than later?”

“Legolas!”

“I’m not wrong, and you know it.”

#lord of the rings #lotr #lord of the rings fanfiction #lotr fanfiction #jrr tolkien #tolkien #aragorn #strider #aragorn x reader #aragorn x you #aragorn imagine #aragorn fanfiction #aragorn fanfic #reader insert #cameo #legolas #legolas greenleaf #legolas thranduilion #frodo baggins

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arwenkenobi48 · 2 years

Text

A Christmas Conundrum

It was snowing outside; a quintessential Christmas Day. I had been looking forward to spending the day watching my favourite movies and scarfing down mince pies, when all of sudden there was a knock at the door. “Who’s that?” Asked Maurice, the bat who always perched on my shoulder. Opening the door, I saw three Zabraks standing there in very thick, fluffy parkas. “Hewwo, Ezwa,” said Feral, his voice muffled behind his scarf. “Can we spend Chwistmas wiv you?” “Of course,” I said. “Come on in,” chirped Maurice. Little did I know I had opened the floodgates and was about to be swept u by the deluge.

While Maul, Saváge and Feral made themselves at home, I began rustling up a feast. However, just as I was preparing things, there was another knock at the door. Mephistopheles was standing there on the porch, with snow all over his hat. “Good morning, Ezra,” he said in his oily voice. “I understand you’re holding a little gathering this Christmas,” “Uh, well-“ I began to say, but I knew I’d have to let him in. As soon as he found the TV, Mephistopheles established a telepathic connection with it and programmed the thing to do 24-hour reruns of all his favourite Christmas films. The soundtrack of The Muppet Christmas Carol is now eternally playing in my mind.

Not even two minutes later, there was another knock at the door. I beheld a long line of my OCs and multifandom faves stretching as far as the eye could see. One by one, they entered. First, Gabriel Belmont (aka Dracula) and his son Trevor (aka Alucard), then Stardust, then the entire cast of Pandæmonium! An entire horde of Orcs, including Flint and Ratbag the Coward, soon followed. Predictably, Sauron and Melkor soon came sauntering into my house. “Oh, boy,” I shuddered. “What have I got myself into?”

“Ahh, that’s better. Good to get out of the cold, isn’t it, father?“ Alucard smiled, putting his feet up. “I like the cold,” said Dracula solemnly. “That makes two of us,” Maul agreed. At which point, Saváge wrapped him up in a huge fleece blanket. “Saváge, unwrap me this instant!” Maul insisted. “All due respect, brother, you need to wrap up warm. Tis the season,” Saváge replied. “Aww, wrap me up too, Saváge!” Feral squeed. The next thing you know, all three Zabraks were wrapped up like a trio of alien burritos.

“Isn’t that cute?“ Mephistopheles chuckled. “They look like Russian dolls,” Lucifer remarked. There was a muffled grumbling noise from Maul and his brothers began fidgeting slightly. “Awww, you’re stuck, ain’t you?” Ratbag smirked. “Mmm-hmmph,” was the unanimous reply. Everyone had a good laugh about it. There was some mistletoe hanging over the doorway to the living room and a certain pair of jewellery-loving dark lords took full advantage of this.

The whole time, I was sprinting back and forth around the kitchen trying to get Christmas dinner organised, with Maurice flying around with spoons and bags of sugar in his mouth. “Hey guys!” I called. “Dinner will be ready soon!“ Then I realised I had interrupted a rather intimate moment between Sauron and Melkor and made a hasty retreat. “Oof, cockblocked by Christmas dinner,” Stardust tried and failed to stifle his laughter. “Why does that sound like a Chuck Tingle book?”

Once everyone had eaten their fill, I was hoping things would settle down a bit and that I’d eventually have the house to myself again. This was not the case. The demons had been rather rowdy right from the start, as they and the orcs had sneaked some mulled wine into the house and had been providing everyone present with drunken renditions of Auld Lang Syne, Jingle Bells and even All I Want For Christmas Is You. Feral would have clapped if he wasn’t stuck in his woollen blanket.

As the Muppets Christmas Carol played for the umpteenth time, the entire gathering began compulsively singing It Feels Like Christmas and Dracula lost it. “If I’d known I would become a guinea pig in this twisted scheme I would never have come here!” he said telepathically. “Whose idea was this anyway!?” “It was mine,” Mephistopheles replied with a fiendish grin. “Yes, sing, my festive puppets!” “I don’t know if I should be impressed at that line or worried that I didn’t say it,” Lucifer had enough time to think, before everyone began singing once again:

It’s in the singing of a street corner choir

It’s going home and getting warm by the fire

It’s true, wherever you find love, it feels like Christmas!

“Hold up!” I said quickly. There was a sound like a record needle scratching and everyone paused. “I thought demons didn’t celebrate Christmas! You know, considering where it came from.” “We used to detest it,” Lucifer stated. “But now it’s been overcommercialised, we love it!” Grinned Mammon. And they all continued singing like nothing ever happened. I sank onto the couch in a heap, surrounded by singing demons, aliens, monsters, vampires and overlords. And yet, as Maurice snuggled into my arms with a tiny Santa hat on his head, I smiled and felt like things were going to be ok.

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akatsuki-shin · 3 years

Text

Review: 天官赐福 Tiān Guān Cì Fú (Heaven Official's Blessing)

Notes:

(Very) long post ahead

Contains spoiler

This is my personal review and does not represent the entire audience, you are free to agree or not agree with what I’ve written here

Feel free to reply/send me a message if there are things you want to discuss

Summary:

The most beloved Crown Prince, pride of the Kingdom of Xianle with abundance of talents and achievements, Xie Lian, ascended to Heaven and became a martial god at the young age of 17 on the path to fulfill his dream "to save the common people".

Three years after his ascension, he saw his kingdom beginning to decline and in order to save his beloved country, Xie Lian defied the rules of Heaven and descended back to the mortal realm. Nevertheless, instead of saving them, his interference ended up accelerating the fall of Xianle, annihilating the once prosperous nation under the war of rebellion and a mysterious, horrifying plague.

The people who once praised and worshipped him day and night now condemned him, his devotees left him, they burnt his temples and divine statues, and Xie Lian himself was ultimately banished from the Heaven.

He ascended for the second time a short while later, but was banished once more very soon after. Since then, he lived among the mortals - surviving by collecting junks as he was now branded as the "God of Misfortune", the "Scrap Collecting Immortal".

800 years later, Xie Lian ascended again for the third time. Though having neither temples nor devotees, he accepted his responsibility as a martial god and carried on with his duties until one day, there came a certain, incidental encounter with a mysterious youth clad in red.

STORY: 7/10

TGCF overall is an (almost) complete, satisfying read with well-written twists and development.

Unlike the two previous MXTX's novels, the main pairing here (HuaLian) did not have to go through complicated misunderstandings and is a beautiful representation of love and devotion. Of course, this means there is a lack of conflict between them, but considering all the trials and tribulations the characters have gone through, this lack of conflict feels like a relieving fresh spring amidst the painful and exhausting journey throughout the entire five books.

The best and my most favorite plot twist is the Earth Master Ming Yi having been dead for a while, and the "Ming Yi" we know turns out to be the Black Water Submerging Boats, He Xuan. I'm the kind of person who always suspects characters, but even my furthest suspicion was "only" him being the Reverend of Empty Words, not He Xuan.

Truthfully, prior to reading this novel, I've seen Shi Qingxuan's "MING-XIONG, I'M SORRY x9999" post before without context, and I thought Ming Yi was going to die a tragic death because of Shi Qingxuan. Turns out it's kind of the opposite, huh? Nice one, really.

I also like how each character's "end" feels satisfying. Especially for the villains, they didn't necessarily have to die some tragic, vengeful death, but was provided with an ending that perfectly fits their background story and deeds. For example, in most stories, a character like Xuan Ji would be most likely be given some well-deserved punishment as her death, given everything she's done. But no, in the end she was given a reality check and was finally able to let go of her hundreds of years grudge. And then Qi Rong - I will talk more about him later on in the "Character" section.

One part I really love is the Extra Chapter about the Cave of Ten Thousand Gods. The chapter itself overall is mostly nonsensical and chaotic, but it was just so touching when HuaLian created a "Little Hua Cheng" statue to accompany Xie Lian's "Crown Prince who Pleased the Gods" statue, especially when this Little Hua Cheng statue gave Crown Prince Xie Lian statue a flower, and then Crown Prince Xie Lian received it, lifted him up and carried him in his arms. This one was maybe a bit biased because as much as I love the current HuaLian, I have a special soft spot for the young Xie Lian carrying, cradling the little Hua Cheng back then in the past. ;v;

Though, with all due respect, I must say that TGCF is actually below my expectation.

The biggest issue I have with TGCF is... What is Xie Lian's motivation? What drives him to move forward in the story? What is even the whole story's purpose?

I'm not quite sure how to word this properly, but let me give some examples.

When you read Harry Potter, you know immediately that Voldemort is the bad guy and he must be defeated.

When you read the Lord of the Rings, you know immediately that the One Ring must be destroyed to prevent Sauron from regaining his power.

Or, in MXTX previous works...

In SVSSS, it was clear since the beginning that Shen Yuan's mission is to fix the "Proud Immortal Demon Way" if he wants to survive.

In MDZS, it was clear that Wei Wuxian, together with Lan Wangji's, needs to unravel the mystery behind that fierce left arm. All of their past stories and WangXian getting together in the end are just something they discovered along the way, not the initial "motivation" that drives the character to move forward.

What about TGCF? The Xie Lian who ascended for the third time actually looks like he just wants to go along with the flow, carrying out his duties day by day with responsibility. When Bai Wuxiang later, later, later on appeared to haunt him again, it didn't seem like Xie Lian has any ambition to hunt him down or exact a revenge, just that he wanted to forget about Bai Wuxiang and never recall anything about him ever again. The main character looks like he's not being driven by anything, just...carrying on where the plot takes him? It's just missions after missions and whatever huge things happening in between is just something they accidentally passed by along the way.

At this point, the only purpose of the story I can think of is bringing Hua Cheng and Xie Lian together. The romance is great, I have no complain. But if it's just that, no need to jammed-pack 250+ chapters just to make two people getting together?

Speaking of which, I also think that the way new characters keep being introduced all the way to almost the final showdown of the story feels info dump-ish, because the background story needs to be dropped there along with the characters, but then most of these characters fade away immediately after.

For example, the previous Civil God before Ling Wen, who looks like he’s going to pose some real trouble, but then was easily defeated and was never mentioned again afterwards. And this is especially true for He Xuan; after such a huge arc where he committed such extreme things, after that he was barely mentioned again, even having his “strong impression” leveled down by the joke about him being the poorest Calamity and owing lots of debts to Hua Cheng.

Basically what makes TGCF a long story is because there are too many stories about the side characters in addition to the main characters that are dumped out of the blue instead of slowly being revealed along the way.

Though, I love how the story gradually unravels the "Four Famous Tales" because initially, I thought it wasn't something crucial, and I wished they could've done this for other characters, too.

There is a little bit of plot holes here and there, as in who actually cut open Jian Lan/Lan Chang's baby and made it a ghost, and for what? Even if it turned out that she just met a bad guy or nobody important, at least provide an explanation in one paragraph? Especially because important side characters like Feng Xin and Mu Qing are involved here, so I'm pretty sure us readers need some explanation.

And more importantly, how can Jun Wu become the Emperor martial god? There's no mention about him ascending, only that he annihilated a dynasty of gods before sitting on the throne of the Great Martial Hall. But how can he, like, emitted god-like aura and not some evil aura? Is it because he used to be a god? But he's a ghost? Explanation where???

The gags and comedies are pretty fun, but honestly, the more I read, the more they ruin the atmosphere and suspense, added with the uncalled PDA between Hua Cheng and Xie Lian even during the most important moments. Honestly, I was bored the fuck out of my life from the moment they start fighting Jun Wu with those divine gundams, and only start gaining interest again much later on when Hua Cheng dissipated into butterflies.

Not saying the story's bad. Just... It's not up to my expectation... Characters being inserted here and there with a bunch of background story, gags and a show of PDA being flaunted during crucial moments. And when Mei Nianqing started telling the truth about the Kingdom of Wuyong, that's just plain info dump right there, seriously...

CHARACTERS: 7/10

Interesting characters, but only a few bore a lasting impression on me. Other than the main characters, which are Xie Lian and Hua Cheng, the only side characters (minus Bai Wuxiang as the main villain) who left quite some impression on me were probably just Feng Xin and Mu Qing.

Pei Ming is okay, at least he is still memorable until the end, and his character improved, too.

He Xuan, after having been introduced with such extreme, after his arc is over, was easily forgotten just like that.

Mei Nianqing, is borderline Deus Ex-Machina with a huge chunk of info dump that could solve everything, then he stopped being useful for the rest of the story.

Shi Qingxuan... Honestly, he's almost annoying, too noisy. I don’t hate him (and I kind of like him initially), but the way his character was being handled and presented post-Black Water arc feels disappointingly lazy and he was just there to make the party more merry.

Xie Lian himself, as the protagonist, how do I say this... This is maybe due to the translator's writing style (not MXTX’s fault), but whenever he screams in all capslock, it feels too extreme and borderline OOC? Of course, the original novel written in hanzi couldn't have included capslock.

What's great about him, though, is that despite all he'd gone through, he can still retain a pure heart and could not be swayed to be evil, just as he himself said "Body in the abyss, heart in paradise".

Now Hua Cheng, he is overall a super interesting character and I personally love this type of male characters. But he seriously is way too OP, almost like the original Luo Binghe (Bing-ge) a.k.a. too ideal, too perfect, no flaws, always capable of easily finding a way out in every single peril. I only forgive him for being like this because he dissipated into butterflies at the end of the battle with Jun Wu, making me think "oh, finally he's actually not invincible".

Still, his devotion to Xie Lian is very well written, very well presented, and his "I am forever your most devoted believer" is just downright the most powerful line in the whole story.

Now I promised to talk about Qi Rong, yeah? I haven't the slightest idea why it is even necessary to have Qi Rong as the Night-touring Green Lantern. I mean, yes he is there to make up the number of the Four Great Calamities, but that was for the characters who live in that world. As the novel's reader, I don't see any particularly important roles there for Qi Rong other than being an annoying meme fodder despite his actually pretty-cool first foreshadowing and appearance? Even his issue with Lang Qianqiu does not seem to give that much impact on the overall story, it could've just passed simply being explained in several pages.

Though I'd say he's got the best character development compared to others. Instead of dying as some hateful villain, the way he ended up deciding to protect Guzi at the cost of his own life can already be expected from miles away, but still bittersweet and touching nonetheless - how this crazed, mental person could still love when being presented with such pure, innocent feelings to the point that he acknowledged Guzi as a his own son.

By the way, E Ming and Ruoye are cute, I take no criticism.

TECHNICAL ASPECTS: 8/10

I can't really describe this with words, but MXTX's overall writing technique has greatly improved since MDZS.

It feels more "solid" to read instead of scattered here and there.

The info distribution has improved (fewer info dump compared to before), the story's no longer switching between past and present all of a sudden.

Description of characters and environment are sufficient, the plot is progressing steadily.

Several issues I have with this aspect though, the Prologue being ten pages is just way too long, I don't think I need that much information being stuffed right to my face right from the beginning.

There are excessive use of "Turns out..." every single time an explanation is going to come.

"Xie Lian didn't know whether he should cry or laugh" is honestly has been used probably more than 50 times just in the last two books. Although I'm reading a translation, I'm pretty sure the original Chinese version is being repetitive with this phrase, as well, because the translators couldn't just whip up any other phrase from thin air and put it in someone else's novel.

Almost half of scene transition is always caused by some sudden, external disturbance like "All of a sudden they heard someone's coming", "All of a sudden X visits their room", etc.

OVERALL SCORE: 7.3/10

Worth to read, satisfying overall. The main pairing's love story is just so well written and sweet. As long as you can withstand the violence and gore, though. 😂

TGCF highlights perhaps one of the ugliest natures of mankind: Being nice to someone as long as they're beneficial, and immediately throwing them away once the benefit was no more.

Once that person does not seem to be beneficial anymore, everyone would leave them instantly, even turning on them and start spitting on them without even trying to understand the reason why said person "stopped being beneficial".

Both as a Crown Prince and a martial god, Xie Lian and the Crown Prince of Wuyong were praised, revered, worshipped by the citizens of Xianle and Wuyong respectively. Because they were always helping, always fulfilling the people's wishes. But how easily it was for those very same people to turn on Xie Lian and the Crown Prince of Wuyong when they encountered misfortunes, completely turning a blind eye to the laborious effort both characters have been putting to save them from annihilation, even if it was visible in broad daylight.

It is also worth to note another trait of mankind that this story underlines: To always find a scapegoat or blame others for one's own misfortune and failure - be it another human being, another group of people, the government, even the gods - after having taking their generosity for granted.

Which is why I think the true villain of the story is not Bai Wuxiang, but those citizens of the ancient Wuyong who were now nothing more than resentful spirits eternally burning within the lava of Tonglu Mountain - a well deserved punishment after what they did to their Crown Prince.

#Tian Guan Ci Fu #TGCF #Heaven Officials Blessing #HuaLian #Xie Lian #Hua Cheng #Review #Danmei #MXTX #Mo Xiang Tong Xiu

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lesbiansforboromir · 3 years

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tbh i'll never be okay w the fact that gondor was willing to actually try to be nice and not condescending w the northmen aka a bunch of blond white ppl who fall under their "middle men" label but never even try to understand the haradrim and easterlings and dunlendings who are rightfully angry at these white ppl colonizing them since literally aldarion's time like no wonder they allied w sauron the elves and numenoreans were the BAD GUYS to them

so SO it’s a more complex issue than that, both in-world and with authorial intent too. Theres- ajsdakjs I do not know where to start- lets start with the BASE in universe stuff.

So firstly the Gondorians and Northmen have always been on generally good terms. This is mainly because the northmen were never invaded and enslaved by Sauron NOR were they really wanted by the Gondorians either. Their lands were very much cradled in the forests of Mirkwood or further north and they were in a tricky spot to get too. Much of the people or Rhun and Harad, meanwhile, were simply not that lucky. Sauron essentially controlled the east and southern peoples through fear, magic and sheer might of armies LONG before Numenor even fully returned to middle earth. It’s doing the Harad and Rhun peoples a disservice to say they ‘allied’ with Sauron, they were forced to be there as much as anyone else a majority of the time.

Even the times when there were wars between JUST Gondor and Rhun and Gondor and Harad, those were either because of Sauron egging them on in the background, or because, indeed, Gondor straight up just had a gratuitously long stint of colonising the south. So IN TEXT the initial reasons for allying with the northmen were very much still selfish on Gondor’s part and had much more to do with land placement and common enemies than anything else, they were still very condescending and did not view the northmen as equals by any means. Hence why Valacar’s marrying one of them caused an entire civil war.

Which also brings me too... I think the Gondorians DID try to ‘understand’ the Haradrim at least, in the way they tried to ‘understand’ the northmen. Which is, tried to figure out how they could benefit them. Tarannon Falastur MARRIED a Haradrim princess, a black numenorean of Umbar, so he must have had discussions and there must have been diplomatic attempts. The fact that he hated his wife shows more that Tarannon Falastur was a bastard, not necessarily that Gondor as a whole viewed the Haradrim differently than the Northman, that is, thought them useful but lowly.

However, now going out of text for a while, I would not place the northmen or the rohirrim in the aspect of like... NOT representing marginalised groups. Yes, blonde and white etc, but I’ve been reading and watching quite a few articles and seminars about late british colonialism and the concepts of ‘warrior races’. To me, taking just the rohirrim, they seem pretty clearly like Tolkien just took Mongolian styles of horsemanship and farming techniques and mashed them together with a kind of old english aesthetic. Hear me out a second because this is really only my own conjecture. The relationship between the Rohirrim and Gondor is this kind of... strange romanticised version of England’s colonialist opinion of India. Like this ‘warrior race’ that is noble? But not developed and we honour them! But we’re not to become like them and we happily let them fight and die in our wars but we’re friends so it’s ok! God this is hard to explain with a migraine. Suffice to say that, just like the rest of the book, the colonialist aspects are VERY present in Gondor’s relationship with the northmen down the years and the racism within the text is very multilayered and very much spiced the the opinions of the time which are somewhat different now and therefore difficult for us to spot.

AND THEN, of course, I have to come in and say yes, none of this is particularly important over the blunt fact that Tolkien created a situation where only the white blonde middle men were allowed a heroic mention in his story and an allyship with Gondor whereas all the subjugated and brutalised middle men who were forced to fight for evil were brown. That’s glaring and has to be acknowledged, even though I think understanding the nuance of the racism is important too? This was rambling, perhaps I will come back to it later.

#chats #urrr #what's a tag for this #erran vs tolkien #Anonymous #asks

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angelofthequeers · 4 years

Text

One Brain Cell Between Three People

Rating: T

Summary: Or: five times these disaster humans had to disguise themselves and the one time they didn't.

Slot: 2.5k+ fic.

Written for an anonymous donor for the @mlbforblm drive, with all profits going right to Color of Change! I hope you love these disasters! The response to the drive was absolutely overwhelming, and I’m touched to have been commissioned for it!

AO3 link

1. From an akuma

“So, Ladybug!” Chat Noir says brightly. “If you’ve got any brilliant plans to get us up to Sauron out there, I’m sure we’d love to hear them!”

Ryuuko doesn’t have a clue who Sauron is, nor how it relates to the massive tentacled monster with one gigantic red eye that’s resting on the tip of the Eiffel Tower. They’ve tried coming from all angles, but the akuma’s eye seems to have a full three-hundred-and-sixty-degree field of vision, because it always sees them coming and bats them away as easily as swatting mosquitoes.

“Why do I have to come up with the plans?” Ladybug grumbles. Chat Noir’s cheeky grin widens.

“Because you’re the brains, milady, and I’m just the humble clown.”

“Your brain was working just fine against Miracle Queen!”

Ryuuko tunes out their banter as she peeks around the corner of the wall behind which they’re hiding. Her brain leaps from idea to idea like arcs of lightning, zapping each one to a crisp when she picks out the flaws, because all of them rely on not being seen and there’s no way to accomplish that against this akuma. It seems to have flawless superhero senses, because it always sees right past the terrified civilians to pick out the superheroes –

Wait…

“I have an idea,” Ryuuko announces. Her teammates’ banter immediately dissipates. “The akuma is ignoring anyone who isn’t directly working against it. It’s almost like it just wants to keep surveillance on everyone.”

“You could say it wants to keep an eye on people,” Chat Noir says cheerfully. Ladybug sighs and facepalms.

“Low-hanging fruit, kitty,” she mutters. Ryuuko just raises an eyebrow and waits for them to finish.

“If we want to get close, we need to not be what it’s looking for,” she says.

“Like sneaking into Le Grand Paris disguised as a pizza delivery person because that’s not what Chloé Bourgeois is expecting you to be even though she knows you’re trying to get back something she stole from you?” Ladybug says. Chat Noir blinks.

“That’s, uh…incredibly specific,” he says. “And I’m not sure I want to know why. You were saying, Ryuuko?”

Unlike Chat Noir, Ryuuko does want to know the context behind Ladybug’s very specific example, because it’s exactly the kind of thing that Marinette would do. The thought of her girlfriend brings a small smile to her lips, just as when she thinks about her boyfriend Adrien. It’s a pity they aren’t superheroes, to be honest; they’d be fantastic, but Ryuuko’s not in any position to make suggestions, so she keeps this to herself.

“Different,” Ryuuko finally manages to say. “We need to not look like superheroes.”

“Disguises!” Ladybug jumps from foot to foot. “I’m so good with disguises! I’ve snuck into the hotel! And a party everyone threw for the guy I liked who’s now my boyfriend since I wasn’t allowed in for being a girl –”

“Why, milady, if your boyfriend didn’t recognise you beneath your strong disguise, he can’t be that much of a keeper,” Chat Noir says.

“My boyfriend is very much a keeper, thank you very much!” Ladybug huffs. “He’s one of the smartest people I know! Apart from Ka – uh, my girl –”

“Akuma,” Ryuuko interjects. Ladybug and Chat Noir jump.

“Right! Akuma!” Ladybug unslings her yo-yo. “There was a costume store on the next street over! For disguises!”

Getting to the store takes far longer than it should, but since there’s a giant eye in the sky, Ryuuko’s sure they could be forgiven for having to be extra slow and cautious. Once Ladybug’s shut the doors behind them and dragged over a chair for good measure, the three of them get to work browsing the multitudes of costume clothing and accessories to find the best pieces to conceal their most obvious features.

“I wish all akumas could be this fun,” Chat Noir beams as he tries on a cowboy hat. “They’re all get out there, get the crap beat out of us, milady comes up with an amazing plan, we’re done. Not that I don’t love the times I get to see Ladybug, of course.”

“I know what you mean,” Ladybug says. Ryuuko slaps a hand over her mouth to smother her giggles at the sight of Ladybug, hero of Paris, wearing a massive blue feather boa and round glasses. “We’ve been doing this for so long that it’s become…monotonous, you know? The only real variety is my Charm.”

“Not the akumas?” Ryuuko says as she selects a long blonde wig, then shudders and replaces it after a moment. Too similar to Chloé Bourgeois. And while they might both be rich girls with mother issues, Ryuuko refuses to think of herself as anything like that spoilt brat, especially after the stunt she’d pulled as Miracle Queen.

Okay, so Ryuuko doesn’t actually remember that, and Chloé does apparently have some semblance of a heart, but still. Ryuuko’s not known for her forgiveness, especially with how much nastier Chloé’s been since that incident.

“Milady! Milady!” Chat Noir yanks out a ladybug-patterned onesie. “I could be you!”

Ladybug snorts. “In your dreams, kitty. You could never be me.”

“But I was once!” Chat Noir tilts his head like a curious kitten would. “Remember?”

“Yes, and you were just amazing at it,” Ladybug says dryly.

“You weren’t any better, Lady Noire!”

“Excuse me? I was perfect!”

“Explain the Cata – uh, power mess-up, then!”

“I still had to figure out the Luc – the Charm!”

“And I could’ve told you not to dust the sentimonster!”

Ryuuko just ignores their arguing this time. Maybe it’s better for them to get it out now, so that they’re focused when facing the akuma. She loses track of time as she sifts through the costumes, wondering why she’s even being so picky in the first place since it’s just to disguise herself from an akuma. Then again, Kagami Tsurugi would never be caught dead in a clown costume, even as Ryuuko. Maybe it’s a good thing to have more refined tastes.

“Hey, guys!” Ladybug says. Ryuuko turns to see Ladybug picking up a large box, having dumped its contents on the ground, and she grins and drops it over her head. “Look, I’m a bug in a box! The perfect disguise! He’ll never know it’s me under here!”

“Come on!” Marinette’s whisper is marred by giggles as she holds out boxes to Adrien and Kagami. “Let’s hide from your bodyguard in these! He’ll never know it’s us under here!”

In that moment – by the silliest way possible – Ryuuko suddenly knows. Now there’s a name to the face beneath the scarlet mask; the face with the bright blue eyes and freckles, framed by pigtails – pigtails! – and currently wearing the same silly smile that Ryuuko has seen a thousand times as Kagami and looks forward to seeing a thousand times more.

Oh, it’s too bad that she can’t tell Adrien that he’s dating Ladybug. His massive superhero crush on her is more obvious than the fact that there’s next to nothing in that pretty head of his. Actually, that’s not fair; Adrien is very smart, but he’s also one of the densest people that Kagami has ever met. Being with him is just like working with Chat Noir, who’s got a very sharp mind when it’s needed –

“Does this make me the Chat in the Hat?” Chat Noir says as he dons a top hat and Ladybug’s laughter grows louder.

– but is also far more of an idiot than anyone has the right to be. It’s a wonder that poor, bi Kagami didn’t trip over herself around Chat Noir like she did with Ladybug, considering how similar he is to Adrien –

Ryuuko freezes. No. No way. There’s no way all three of them could be that lucky; that Marinette and Adrien, Ladybug and Chat Noir, were pining for each other this whole time, that Ryuuko fell for the two people who happened to be the heroes of Paris, that there’s a reason why Chat Noir showed her so much care after she was Oni-Chan and why Ladybug was so sweet and understanding of her failures as both Kagami and Ryuuko –

“– something picked out, Ryuuko?” Ladybug’s – Marinette’s – voice pierces the fog that’s descended on Ryuuko and shrouded her thoughts with realisation after realisation as she combs through every memory of her interactions with them. “I mean, this has been really fun, but we probably should get back to doing actual superhero things.”

Ryuuko takes a deep breath to ground herself. She’s far better trained than this; she shouldn’t allow herself to be so distracted during a mission. “Yes, I’m ready,” she says and grabs the first armful of cloth and accessories that she can find. She can fall apart later. Right now, she has a job to do, and she’s not going to let her partners down.

2. From Paris

Kagami loves her boyfriend and girlfriend. She really does. But there are times where she wonders if being with them is worth the constant emotional turmoil that they always seem to put her through.

“The fattoush looks good,” says Adrien, who’s seated across from Kagami. The fact that he’s wearing a hideous straw brim hat and sunglasses so appalling that they would give his father an aneurysm on the spot is the source of Kagami’s current agony. “But I’m tempted to go for the kibbeh, just because Father would die if he knew that I was eating something fried.”

“Do it,” Marinette says immediately. Kagami’s pain is compounded by the fact that her girlfriend is wearing a pair of glasses with a large fake nose and moustache attached, along with a sickeningly horrible pink poncho. But then again, for a budding fashion designer to wear something so awful? Maybe she’s smarter than Kagami had first thought.

Of course she is, says a traitorous little voice in Kagami’s brain. She’s Marinette. She’s Ladybug. But even being Ladybug isn’t enough to save her from Kagami’s judgement. Why couldn’t Adrien and Marinette have just worn an oversized hoodie like she did?

Okay, so it’s Adrien’s oversized hoodie, and the smell of him envelops her like a warm hug whenever she ducks her face down beneath the collar, but still.

“Done,” Adrien says and slams his menu down. The couple at the next table over stare at him, but his disguise seems to work because they might think he’s a weirdo, but they don’t appear to think that he could be Adrien Agreste. “What about you, Gami?”

As always, Kagami’s insides flutter at Adrien’s use of his and Marinette’s nickname for her. She clears her throat and squints down at her menu, which may as well be written in English what with how nothing seems to compute in her brain, and she blurts out the first thing she sees. “Shish barak.”

Marinette wrinkles her nose. “Sure, if you’re into yoghurt.”

“Does that mean you’re gonna steal just my food?” Adrien complains. “Maybe I should order the shish barak too, so you leave my food alone.” He’s promptly shut down by Marinette giving him a quick kiss on the cheek.

“No, you’re getting the kibbeh,” she says.

“Yeah, I’m getting the kibbeh,” Adrien parrots robotically. Marinette smiles sweetly.

“And I’ll have the djaj mashwi,” she says, while Kagami ponders the merits of slamming her head on the table at the sheer display of Ladybug and Chat Noir energy from her two oblivious idiots. “I’m in the mood for chicken.”

Kagami pushes all thoughts of clobbering her partners’ heads together away as Adrien plays foot wrestling with her under the table and Marinette waves a waiter over to order. For now, she’s just going to enjoy this silly date in their silly disguises.

3. From Lila

She’s everywhere.

She’s hanging off Adrien on his way to fencing. She’s tangling their legs together when she crashes their study dates. She’s smothering the air around them with her cloying citrusy perfume as she laughs far too loudly at Adrien’s joke during a friends’ hangout.

And there’s nothing that Adrien can do about it. If he does one thing that even hints at defiance, Lila Rossi will go running straight back to tattle to his father like the venomous little muse she is. Even the fact that Adrien’s taken – by two people – has done nothing to dissuade her. If anything, she takes this as an open invitation.

“Oh, this kind of thing is very common in Italy!” Lila had crooned one day when Kagami had – very politely, in her opinion, since no swords were involved – asked her to please take her hands off Kagami’s and Marinette’s boyfriend, thank you very much. “It was so good to learn that Adrien had two girlfriends! There’s so much love in his heart…and so much room for more…”

It’s a sunny afternoon after school when Kagami finally snaps. Not at Lila; no, she knows very well what Gabriel would do in retaliation if his precious spy was hurt in any way. Rather, as soon as fencing is over and she’s changed out of her sweaty gear, she barges into the boys’ bathroom with her heavier-than-usual fencing bag.

“Kagami!” Adrien yelps and slaps his hands over his nipples. Kagami rolls her eyes.

“You don’t have breasts, Adrien,” she says with every ounce of patience that she’s had to curate since learning her partners’ secret identities. “And it’s nothing that Marinette and I haven’t seen before. Speaking of Marinette, hurry up and get dressed.”

“Why?” Adrien hurries to throw on his top, further confirming Kagami’s suspicion that he’s started changing after fencing as slowly as possible to put off the moment he has to leave and be accosted by Lila. “Is she hurt? Did Lila or Chloé throw her over the balcony or something?”

“Not yet,” Kagami mutters. She rummages in her fencing bag for Adrien’s oversized hoodie that she’s…ahem, delayed returning. Because she has definitely intended to return it. Eventually. Which is now. “She’s letting Lila…spout hot air? Is that the saying?”

“And you left them alone together?” Adrien snatches his hoodie and tries to yank it on so quickly that his head ends up caught in the sleeve with his arm. Sighing, Kagami helps him correct his mistake while trying as hard as possible not to let her fond smile at her boyfriend’s dorkiness slip through.

“Marinette can handle herself.” Kagami fishes out a pair of sunglasses and a green baseball cap. “It’s Lila I’d be worried about. In any case, she’s keeping Lila occupied, but there’s only so much threatening and bragging that Lila can do before she grows bored.”

“Then what’s –?”

“We’re sneaking you out. Come on.”

Kagami tugs Adrien over to one of the tiny windows in the bathroom. Then, in one smooth movement, she crouches and cups her hands for Adrien’s foot. Gritting her teeth and drawing on every bit of athletic strength she has, she propels Adrien up to the window and locks herself in place so that he can pop the latch and push the window open.

“Damn it!” Adrien curses when the locker room door opens. Kagami prays it’s not –

“Adrien?” Lila’s sickly-sweet voice echoes in the locker room. Thank goodness for bathroom doors, or she’d have caught them in a heartbeat. “Where are you? I didn’t see you walk out.”

With newfound fervour and a boost from Kagami, Adrien grabs the windowsill and propels himself upwards. He almost doesn’t fit – Kagami holds her breath when he ends up stuck halfway out and curses – but then he forces out a loud breath of air for just that little less abdominal width and manages to slide fully out the window. Kagami just has to assume that he’s fine and has no serious injuries from his landing, although being hurt would probably be preferable to him over dealing with Lila.

She gives it to the count of ten, then flushes a random toilet and washes her hands before pushing the bathroom door open. Lila immediately materialises in front of her.

“Kagami! Hi!” Lila says with a very fox-like smile. “I wasn’t expecting you to use the boys’ bathroom.”

Kagami shrugs. “After you called me a boy with boobs the other day, I figured it shouldn’t matter if I used the boys’ bathroom. There’s really no difference except for the urinals. And the stench. I wouldn’t recommend it.”

“Oh, I was only teasing.” Lila sounds like she was doing anything but. “Where’s Adrien? He’s usually finished changing by now.”

“I don’t know,” Kagami says with another shrug. “He’s not in the bathroom either, though. You can go and see for yourself.”

Before Lila can take up any more of her precious time, Kagami brushes past her and out of the locker room. As soon as the door swings shut behind her, she lets her giggle break free into her hand and pulls out her phone to check in with her accomplices – er, her partners. Now she truly understands the saying “being bad has never felt so good”.

4. From an akuma take 2

“I seriously want to know what goes through Hawkmoth’s mind half the time,” Misterbug complains. He deflects a burst of pink perfume with his yo-yo, then ducks so that Lady Noire can jab Princess Fragrance with her staff. “Like, remember the days we thought he was Mr Agreste? And then I realised ‘no, he can’t be, because Mr Agreste at least has some creativity!’”

Ryuuko isn’t sure whether she wants to pat Misterbug on the head in agreement or slap him to get his head back in the game. To be fair to Hawkmoth, Puppeteer had been one of his most powerful akumas with her ability to control someone if she has a doll or similar representation of them, so akumatising her for a third time isn’t too foolish of a move. And considering that Ladybug and Chat Noir merchandise is very widespread, the decision to swap their Miraculouses like with Reflekdoll had been inevitable. Ryuuko’s never been more grateful that she’s not considered a steady enough temporary hero to have merchandise made of her, so there’s no way for Puppeteer to control her.

If she’s honest, Ryuuko can’t really scold Misterbug for not fully focusing. Not when she has to spend a whole mission with her girlfriend in a tight black catsuit. And while Ryuuko is very much asexual, only a fool would deny the sheer beauty of Marinette Dupain-Cheng with a long braid and a suit sculpted to her body and an uncharacteristic smirk on her face that’s much more reminiscent of Chat Noir than Ladybug. If Ryuuko had even an iota of artistic skill, she’d spend hours just trying to capture Marinette’s beauty in all forms, starting with the feline goddess who’s just managed to trick Silencer and Jackady into hitting each other. Silencer immediately starts to cluck like a chicken, while Jackady frantically starts shuffling his cards, trying to make his power work without his voice.

“Heads up!” Tortue Verte’s shield whizzes over Lady Noire’s head and nails Darkblade right in the face. She whoops and punches the air. “Strike! I could so get used to this.”

“As hot as you look in my colours, babe,” says Foxtrot, using his flute to keep panther Animan’s jaws away from him while he’s sprawled on the road, “I kinda miss Rena. And using the shield. Never thought it’d suck to have merch of me.”

Knowing that Ladybug is Marinette, Ryuuko’s almost certain of the identities of Tortue Verte and Foxtrot, aka Rena Rouge and Carapace. But considering that they’re in the middle of a battle and there are several brainwashing akuma puppets, she buries that thought very deep down and instead focuses on deflecting one of Reverser’s paper planes with her sword. There’ll be time later to muse on secret identities, when they’re not in the heat of one of the most chaotic battles that Paris has ever seen.

5. From Gabriel

Death is far too good for Gabriel Agreste.

“Breaking up with Adrien is the last thing we’re going to do,” Kagami says as Marinette sobs hysterically into her chest on the soft pink chaise. The anger simmering beneath her skin is almost at boiling point, threatening to bubble over and explode out of her, and her crying girlfriend is the only thing keeping her grounded. One of them has to be on the lookout for akumas, and it’s most definitely not going to be Marinette in her current state.

“B-But you heard M-Mr Agreste,” Marinette chokes out. “He’ll p-pull Adrien from school. And – your m-mother – we’re j-just a d-distraction to you – he said she told him –”

“Rubbish.” Kagami runs her fingers through Marinette’s hair and presses a soft kiss to her head. So many years of being hard, of compartmentalising her irrelevant and distracting emotions to please her mother, to live up to the Tsurugi name, and then she’d met the boy and girl of her dreams and now she’s alive, and she feels so strongly, and no one is going to take this away from her. What is honour if it means turning her back on those who need her? On those she cares about?

“B-But –”

“No. Marinette, listen to me.” Kagami cups Marinette’s cheek and guides her face up. The sight of her girlfriend’s red-rimmed blue eyes is enough for the poisonous rage inside her to almost break free, but she forces it back down as though it’s a rabid animal on a leash. If Marinette gets akumatised, all is lost; not only because she’s Ladybug, but because she’s one of the kindest, sweetest, most amazing people that Kagami has ever had the fortune to meet. And if Kagami gets akumatised, the emotional toll of having to defeat and purify her will more than likely be too much for Marinette to bear after everything else that’s happened today.

“Kagami…?”

Kagami blinks and shakes her head to clear her tumultuous thoughts. Later. She can process her own emotions later. For now, Marinette needs her.

“I’ve never been more focused since meeting you and Adrien,” Kagami says. “And if Mother even tries to argue, I have a whole presentation prepared. I’m serious. I have it saved on my flash drive.”

Marinette lets out a weak giggle. Kagami basks in the glow of this laughter, as tiny as it is, because it’s tangible proof that, as awful as she can be interacting with other people, she’s improving. She knows enough to support one of the people dearest to her.

“Mother might not have been happy, but she didn’t try and interfere,” Kagami continues. “She said that so long as my focus did not waver, she would give me her tentative blessing. I suspect that Adrien’s father has spoken to her and persuaded her that you are a negative influence on me and Adrien. That will change once I talk to her.”

“And…Adrien?”

“We’ll work it out.” Kagami leans in and leaves a soft little kiss on the top of Marinette’s nose, and she’s rewarded with another watery yet musical giggle. “The only thing we’re not going to do is break up with him. That will crush him. We’re going to tell him exactly what his father said.”

“We can’t!” Marinette jerks back and almost topples backward off her chaise, if not for Kagami’s arms around her. “Mr Agreste will pull him out of school and he’ll never get to see his friends again and he’ll know it’s all my fault and he’ll be unhappy for the rest of his life and end up turning to evil and working with Hawkmoth and we’ll never marry him and have three kids – more if you want them but I want three and they’ll be Emma and Hugo and Louis – and a hamster called –”

“How do you even have enough breath to say all of that?” Kagami says, trying not to pass out just from following Marinette’s catastrophising ramblings. Marinette laughs rather hysterically.

“It’s a gift. But we can’t tell him! He’d refuse to break up and I’d be responsible for him losing everything!”

“Shouldn’t he have that choice?” Kagami says. “Everyone around him tries to control him. Adrien deserves to be able to make that choice. And this isn’t solely on your shoulders. We’re both dating him.”

“But…how do we talk to him?” Marinette whispers. Now she’s slumping against Kagami with fluttering eyes, as though she’d just participated in an extremely strenuous bout of fencing and is two minutes from passing out. Considering her anxiety-ridden ramblings from just before, she probably has exerted that much energy, just mentally rather than physically. “His father will never let him out. We’d have to stand at the front door, and he’d know as soon as we tried to talk to Adrien.”

“We default to our usual plan.” Kagami gently untangles herself from Marinette so that she can cross over to Marinette’s wardrobe and start rummaging inside. “Disguises.”

“But what good is that going to do?”

“Plausible deniability. Adrien’s bodyguard is a very firm ally, but even he can’t ignore direct orders. However, if he allowed Adrien out to talk to some friends instead of his girlfriends…”

“Of course!” Marinette breathes. Kagami is suddenly tackled from behind and is forced to throw her hands out and grab the sides of Marinette’s wardrobe to prevent herself from faceplanting. “Gami, you’re a genius! I love you, I love you, I love you!”

The poisonous anger that had been burning through Kagami’s body dissipates at Marinette’s words and gives way to soft warmth, like the sun is shining inside her. Once her legs are steady underneath her, she turns and wraps her arms around Marinette, who’s now trying to plaster every inch of her face with kisses.

“I had to bring something to this relationship, didn’t I?” Kagami says. “You and Adrien are far too chaotic to be left alone. Come on, help me pick out some disguises so we can go and talk to Adrien.”

Kagami had never imagined that Hawkmoth’s defeat would go this way.

It was supposed to be glorious. A fantastic final battle full of clashing superpowers and pumping adrenaline.

But no. Adrien had caught a glimpse of Nooroo – Hawkmoth’s kwami – during a visit to his father’s office to confront Gabriel for his stunt regarding Marinette and Kagami and trying to break the three of them up. From there, it had been far too easy for Ladybug and Chat Noir to simply sneak in and steal the Butterfly Miraculous after Adrien had somehow slipped some sleeping pills into his father’s expensive whiskey.

(Or rather, Plagg had done that part, but Kagami’s not supposed to know about her boyfriend being Chat Noir, so she’s considerately refrained from pointing out the flaws in the “official” story).

Gabriel and Nathalie – aka Mayura – had been arrested the following day. In the wake of their arrests, Kagami had thought that Adrien would jump at the chance to be done with them and pretend they never existed. But her boyfriend had proven that, despite the years of emotional abuse he’d been forced to endure, he’s still got one of the biggest hearts that Kagami has ever seen.

“I love them,” Adrien had whispered into a midnight three-way cuddle, finally allowed to crack and break down after so much time fearing the consequences of emotional vulnerability. “After everything they did to Paris…to me…there’s a part of me that still…I don’t want to forgive them, but I don’t want to hate them. I just want them to…not be. You know?”

And that leads to now. Kagami, Alya, and Nino have been gathered in Adrien’s temporary suite in Le Grand Paris, where he’s been staying until his bodyguard can be awarded permanent custody since Emilie Agreste had been laid to rest just days before.

“Thank you for coming,” Ladybug begins, wringing her hands. “I know that there wasn’t really a final battle or anything –”

“Pity,” Nino mutters. “Been looking forward to smacking that guy in the face for years.”

“– but I still wanted to thank you for stepping up and putting yourselves on the line,” Ladybug continues, while Chat Noir’s lips twitch at Nino’s comment. “I trust the other heroes, of course, but you three are, well…I’d trust you with my life. And with what Chat Noir and I are about to reveal.”

Chat Noir’s lips quirk again, but it’s hollow. A small part of Kagami wonders if it’s appropriate for her to know exactly why, when even his own superhero partner doesn’t know.

“Even though Hawkmoth and Mayura are gone, there’s still so much to do with the Miraculouses,” Ladybug says. “Petty crimes, little acts of goodness…and figuring out how to do this whole Guardian thing. Part of that is not leaving the kwamis locked up in the Box for centuries. So, now that Hawkmoth is gone, and identities aren’t an issue anymore…”

Alya almost faints when Ladybug retrieves the Fox Miraculous from her yo-yo and holds it out. She stretches her hand out to take it, pauses with her fingers right above the golden chain, and she only snatches it away and hugs it to her chest with squeals of ecstasy when Ladybug smiles and nods. Nino actually yanks Ladybug in for a tight hug when she gives him the Turtle Miraculous before letting go to talk to the turtle kwami that had materialised, just as Alya is currently chatting away to the fox kwami so fast that her words are almost just a buzzing sound.

It takes every ounce of willpower for Kagami to not lose her composure and shriek when Ladybug presents her with the Dragon Miraculous. Instead, she forces herself to contain the energy that’s vibrating beneath her very skin, and she bows her head and accepts the choker from her masked girlfriend.

“Greetings, Kagami-san!” Longg says once she’s appeared in a flash of red light. “I am thrilled that you are to be my permanent holder!”

“As am I, Longg-sama,” Kagami says with a smile and holds out a hand for Longg to settle on.

“Now that that’s out of the way,” Ladybug says when Kagami, Alya, and Nino have finally exhausted themselves from excitement, “Chat Noir and I have something that we want to tell you.”

Chat Noir reaches out and takes Ladybug’s hand with a small smile. Alya looks like she’s going to burst with excitement, but that’s nothing compared to her reaction after Ladybug and Chat Noir utter their next words.

“Spots off.”

“Claws in.”

As soon as their transformation lights fade, it becomes painfully obvious that they hadn’t revealed themselves to each other before this moment. Alya’s screaming – muffled into a pillow to avoid security rushing up to them – and Nino’s wordless gaping are to be expected. What’s not expected is the way Marinette and Adrien take one look at each other, then squeal and jump apart.

“Oh my god, it’s you!” they bellow. Their kwamis, meanwhile, are doubled over in mid-air with laughter.

“Dude!” Nino holds up his hands with the look of someone who’s doing ten equations at once in their heads while being utterly awful at mathematics.

“My best friend is Ladybug!” Alya shrieks. “Since when? How the hell didn’t you two figure it out from being together? Is that why you gave me the Fox? And missed class all the time? And all the times you flaked – you were off being Ladybug – my best friend –”

Kagami just stands in the centre of this storm and smiles down at Longg.

“And you!” Alya jabs a finger at Kagami. “How the hell did you manage to land Ladybug and Adrien Agreste? Tell us mere mortals your secret!”

“You’re not even surprised?” Marinette splutters. “How did you –?”

“Because unlike others in this room…” Kagami takes a step forward and leans in. Marinette and Adrien lean back with wide eyes and pink cheeks. “I have a brain cell.” Then she leans back and savours the mixture of indignation and awe on her partners’ faces. She might pay for this later, but for now? She’s going to savour this sweet, sweet victory while she can, before Marinette and Adrien team up to punish her.

She won’t complain too much, though. She’s sure they’ll work out an appropriate punishment…like kissing her until her brain melts. She can live with that.

44 notes · View notes

cosmicbug379 · 4 years

Text

Ever Northward Gaze

Guys I made myself really sad with this one. Like so sad I cried writing it at 11 last night. It’s not my normal thing, but here we are. Also the title is actually from the book of Lord of the Rings! In the book, when Boromir dies, Aragorn and Legolas sing the Lament for Boromir and it’s really sad and I’ve been listening to the version on Youtube that Karliene did (she’s one of my favorite artists honeslty and she has some really good LotR and Game of Thrones stuff so definitely check her out, she’s amazing!) and I was being sad about it so here we are. It does not have a happy ending so be warned. Also, i picked some pieces from the book, and some from the movies and I combed through the timeline of the fellowship and looked up a lot of distances and stuff so the timeline and days is as accurate as I could make it and it’s literally only mentioned like 3 times so that’s fun. I also only tagged a couple people cuz I really honestly don’t know who even wants to read this. Okay sorry for the world’s longest Author’s Note.

Fandom: Lord of the Rings

Pairing: Boromir x reader

Words: 1496

Warnings: Major character death

It had been months since you had last received a letter from Boromir, and you hated it. You understood why-the need for secrecy had been clear-but you still didn’t like it. The last letter he had sent was from Rivendell, he said he was joining a quest, a fellowship that was setting out to bring the One Ring to Mordor. You knew he left because Lord Elrond had sent word that it had been found, there had been a council called to Rivendell to discuss what to do with it. His father wanted him to bring it back to Gondor, so they could attempt to use it against Sauron, but the Ring was evil, it couldn’t be used against it’s master.

You missed Boromir terribly. He was supposed to come right back, instead it had been 241 days since he had left for Rivendell and 132 days since his last letter had arrived. He was only supposed to be gone a little over 100 days, and now it had been more than twice that since you had last seen your husband.

You had spent most of your time since Boromir’s departure in the Houses of Healing. Ioreth had taught you from a young age, and you quickly discovered you enjoyed it and you were good at it. Faramir always said you were the perfect balance to his brother. He was always the soldier, ready to fight; you always wanted to help people, heal them.

When you weren’t in the Houses of Healing, you were in the rooms you usually shared with Boromir. You enjoyed painting, and you had a balcony that overlooked Pelennor Fields and you could just see Osgiliath in the distance. You also enjoyed singing, and Boromir insisted you had the voice of an angel, even when you told him he was wrong. You were writing a song for when he finally returned to you, but you were stuck. You had been on edge for over a week now, you weren’t sure why, but you had a bad feeling about something. Your sleep had been restless and your dreams troubled when you had them.

7 nights ago you had dreamt that you saw Boromir’s body in a small boat passing down the river Anduin. You were sobbing when you woke up, and stumbled your way to Faramir’s room. He said he had the same dream, and it made you even more uneasy. You were worried. A weight had come over you, you feared you would never see your husband again.

You sat in your room now, reading over his last letter again. The ink had started to fade and the edges were worn. You read his letters often, trying to remind yourself of him, but this was your favorite.

My darling wife,

It has been too long since I last saw you, and I fear it will be even longer still. I regret to tell you this will be my last letter for some time. I have volunteered to accompany a brave young hobbit in his quest to bring Isildur’s Bane to Mordor. I hope our path will bring us close to home and I will be able to see you, but I am not so sure.

We are walking, it is best that way, horses will draw too much attention. It will be a long time before we pass into Gondor or anywhere close to the White City, but I will count the days until I can see you again.

I miss you more than I can put into words, my love. I miss sleeping beside you and waking up with you in my arms. I miss your smile and the way your eyes shine when you do. I miss the sound of you singing to me, and I miss the sound of your laugh. I even miss the way you scold me when I distract you from your work. I cannot wait to hold you again, to kiss you again. You know me better than anyone, and I think you may even know me better than Faramir does. I miss you.

I must stop now, before someone walks by and sees me becoming a blubbering mess over a letter to my wife. Watch over Faramir, father is too hard on him. Don’t let him take anything my father says to heart.

All my love,

Boromir

You weren’t sure when you had started crying, but a few tears dropped onto the fading words. It was a few moments later when you jumped, hearing the sound of a horn. The horn that signified someone was approaching the Citadel. Was Faramir back so soon?

You raced to the courtyard and saw a messenger there. He was carrying something wrapped in a cloth and he had a grim look on his face. The uneasiness you had been feeling for days crept up inside you, stronger than ever. The messenger looked at you and showed you what was wrapped in the cloth. The Horn of Gondor. Cloven in two. Boromir had taken that with him when he left for Rivendell. That means…

“I’m sorry, my lady,” the messenger said quietly.

You heard a scream of anguish, the saddest thing you had ever heard. It took you a moment to realize the sound had come from you. You weren’t sure how long you stayed there sobbing, but it was long enough that your handmaiden became worried. She and Ioreth found you and took you to your rooms, but you barely even noticed they were there.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You knew Gandalf had arrived in the city with a hobbit that day, and you waited outside the throne room while they spoke to Denethor. You had worn nothing but black for 6 days, since news of Boromir’s fate had reached Minas Tirith. You knew you should put on a finer dress to greet your guests, but you couldn’t bring yourself to wear anything else. All your dresses were ones Boromir had bought for you.

You looked up as Gandalf exited, followed by the halfling. He stopped when he saw you and gave you a look of sympathy.

“My lady… I wish we were meeting again in happier times,” he said quietly.

“As do I, Mithrandir,” you replied. Turning to the halfling you spoke again, “I know Gandalf, but we have not met, what is your name?”

“Pippin, my lady. You are Boromir’s wife aren’t you?”

“Yes, Boromir was my husband… I understand you are a friend of his,” you said, waving away Gandalf’s attempt to scold the hobbit.

“I like to think so... He spoke of you often. He loved you, and he was right, you are indeed beautiful, my lady,” Pippin blushed a little and looked down.

“Thank you,” you hesitated. You weren’t sure you wanted to know the answer to your next question, but you had to ask. “How did he die?”

Pippin looked at Gandalf, as if asking permission. With a nod from Gandalf he turned from you again.

“He died defending me and my kinsman, Merry. We were north of here at Amon Hen, near the statues of the old kings. There were many Uruk-Hai and he fought bravely to save us. He was pierced by 3 arrows before he fell.” he said.

Your slowly cracking facade of composure finally broke. You tried not to openly sob, but you couldn’t stop the tears leaving your eyes. That sounded like your Boromir. Fighting to defend those who could not defend themselves.

“Thank you, Pippin,” you whispered. “For telling me. I am glad he was at least able to save you and your friend. I hope I get to meet Merry some day.”

“I hope we will see him again too, my lady,” he answered.

“Gandalf? Watch over this one. He is brave and he has a good heart. Boromir would be proud of him,” you said with a sad smile.

Gandalf squeezed your shoulder gently before leading Pippin away. You watched them go, trying to keep your tears at bay. Yes, you could see why Boromir loved this little hobbit. Even from the short conversation, you could see it.

You wandered to your rooms again, telling your handmaiden not to disturb you unless absolutely necessary; you wanted to be alone. You went through your wardrobe, looking for one of the shirts Boromir had left behind. When you found one, you held it close to your face. You could still smell him on it, you didn’t want to think about when you would no longer be able to.

You collapsed onto your bed, sobbing into the shirt, clutching it tightly to your chest.

Boromir was gone, and he wouldn’t be able to come back to you now. You wouldn’t kiss him again, or hold him or fall asleep next to him. You wouldn’t have children that you would raise to be healers and warriors. You would be alone now for the rest of your days, with nothing but his memory.

Tags: @rzrcrst @longitud-de-onda

#lord of the rings #lord of the rings fanfic #lord of the rings fanfiction #boromir #boromir x reader #boromir fanfic #boromir fanfiction #get ready for sadness

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