#it's gonna feel the same sick way . and then u will be in an uncomfortable conversation and ur gonna cry and say that ur kidding

[hier--soir]

bite the bullet

joel miller x f!reader

rating: explicit, 18+ mdni summary: two idiots finally bite the bullet and admit how they feel. warnings/tags: [18+ minors DNI] fwb!joel, age gap [20 years], angst, miscommunication, a meddling Tommy Miller, soft sleepy sex, oral [f], unprotected piv, masturbation [f], rimming, sixty-nine, both of them are assholes for a minute, resolved emotional tension. word count: 9.4k [i got carried away sorry!] series masterlist | masterlist this is part four of my fwb!joel series. you can find the other parts here: one, two, three.

Everything was wet.

Your feet squelched against the ground as you moved, little flicks of water splashing up against your shins with every step. Inside waterlogged shoes your socks clung uncomfortably to your skin.

Tommy was crouched underneath your sink, inspecting the u-bend of the pipe there, his lower half damp from the water that covered the floor of your kitchen.

“It’s definitely comin’ from in here,” his muffled voice came, and you groaned, rubbing a hand over your face in exasperation. “I can stop it, but it’s gonna take some time for the place to dry out. I’d say you’d better clear out for a few days, leave a few windows open.”

You’d had a nice day. A lovely day, even. And you’d been looking forward to curling up with a whiskey and a good book before bed. But upon returning home from the greenhouse, you’d been horrified to find the entrance of your home covered in a thin layer of water. Splashing down the hall, you’d discovered that the entire place was wet; a shiny film of liquid coating anything that touched the ground. The wooden floorboards were soaked to the bone with cold water. A fucking flood. Thankfully Tommy was right, and you trusted that the August humidity would naturally dry it out with enough time.

“I can’t just stay here? I didn’t think it was too bad,” you lied. “Could lay down some towels.”

Tommy laughed under the sink. “You know you’ll get sick if you’re sleeping around all this water – towels or no towels.”

“Okay,” you acquiesced, gazing at the floor glumly. “Okay, yeah, I suppose I’ll uh… I’ll get some stuff together.”

“Joel would take you,” his said, and you snapped back to reality, staring at his back while he worked. You could practically hear the grin in his voice. When you didn’t respond, his head reappeared, and he looked at you curiously, tucking a wayward strand of hair behind his ear. “You and Joel are pals, right? Pals help each other out.”

Pals, you thought cynically. That’s one word for it.

Two weeks had slowly passed since the Peterson incident, and you’d only seen Tommy’s older brother a handful of times. There was still a tense energy between the two of you, so you’d been keeping your distance a little, allowing things to cool off. Bumping into each other here and there, dinner on the same table at the hall… but no alone time. No real time that would leave you two open to actually talking about it. That didn’t mean it didn’t play on your mind, though. Oh boy did it. In fact, most days you’d catch yourself gazing into a pot plant, thinking about that night. The way he’d taken you, made you tell him the details about Peterson, the way he’d showed you he fucking owned you. You couldn’t wrap your head around the way it had made you feel, and so you avoided it, even though your chest ached with the Joel-sized hole his absence had left in it. At least you weren’t so stubborn that you couldn’t admit to yourself how much you missed him.   

Your eyes narrowed suspiciously, and Tommy gave a polite shrug, smirking at you. Testing you. A huff escaped your lips, and you broke eye contact, stretching out your shoulder. “Yeah, alright, I’ll ask him,” you agreed begrudgingly, brain whirring trying to come up with excuses. “It’s late though, and he might not want me there.”

“It’s not that late, but sure,” he chuckled knowingly, going back to work on the pipe. “When hell freezes over and Joel says no to you, you let me know.”  

An hour later, you were on your best friend’s porch, a bag slung over your arm, hesitating with your knuckle raised in the air. Taking a deep breath and running through what you were going to say, you finally willed yourself to rap your fist twice against the wood.

After a moment, the door swung open to reveal Joel, in a soft wrinkled t-shirt.

An easy, involuntary smile spread across your face upon seeing him. His beard was a little longer than he usually kept it, greys sparkling through the dark hair that framed his mouth so handsomely. He had clearly been settling down for the night, and he looked oh so cosy dressed in his sleep clothes.

“Hey man,” you offered up a sheepish smile.

He looked appropriately surprised to see you, considering you certainly hadn’t been knocking on his door at any point in the past fortnight. One of his eyebrows hitched upward, and he eyed the bag over your shoulder warily. “You skippin’ town or something? Who’d you piss off this time?”

You rolled your eyes and readjusted the duffel. “You gonna let me inside? This thing’s kind of heavy.”

He stepped back into the entryway with a grunt, allowing you to breeze past him and dump the bag onto the ground with a low thud. “Pipe under my sink is busted. Flooded the whole place today – Tommy said I should clear out for a day or two.”

He hummed, narrowed eyes raking over your face. “Oh yeah? So where you gonna go?” he teased, and relief rushed through your veins like warm water as you recognised the smirk threatening to take over his face.  

You gave him a small laugh and sighed, holding your arms out in mock surrender. “Come on, Miller,” you said. “Let me crash here – I’ll owe you one.”

“Owe me one, huh?” his eyes shone with mischief. “Well I like the sound of that.” An odd, twisting sensation rippled through your stomach and you sucked your lips into your mouth, nodding slowly.

“Sure,” you retorted. “Whatever you want, it’s yours.” When the words left your lips you both stilled, staring at each other warily.

He hummed, eyes darkening a fraction. “You’re playin’ with fire,” is all he said, before bending down to pick the bag up off the ground and ushering you towards the stairs.

You wondered off ahead of him, and when you reached the landing you veered right, pushing open the door to the spare room. He didn’t follow you in immediately, instead pausing in the doorway with a frown plastered across his face. You hadn’t thought about where you’d be sleeping until the second you reached the top of the stairs, but you knew this was the right decision. Sharing a bed with Joel for a few days? Probably not a good idea. Unless of course, that was going to be how you repaid your debt…Thankfully, or unfortunately, he didn’t push it, dropping the bag gently in the corner of the room.

“Hope Ellie won’t be bothered I’m here for a few days,” you thought aloud. The tone noticeably shifted, and you almost at how Joel seemed to deflate.  

He leant an arm against the doorframe and sighed. “She ain’t spendin’ much time in the house these days,” he admitted quietly. “Stays in the bungalow or goes out. I doubt you’ll even see her.”

You hesitated for a second before asking, “Have you two spoken much lately?”

He scratched his chin for a moment. “You know the kid,” he shrugged. “She’s stubborn. M’tryin’ not to push it.” 

“It’ll be okay, Joel,” you offered softly. “She’ll come around.”

He assessed you silently, eyes flitting down your body before resting on your face once again, and then he stepped back into the hall. Coughing awkwardly, he raised a hand in a sort of farewell, and said, “Well, uh, you know where everything is. I’m gonna… I was gonna head to bed, I guess.”

“Okay,” you nodded, watching as he turned to head toward his room.

“Hey, Joel, wait,” you called, and he turned, eyes glimmering with something you couldn’t quite place. I miss you, you wanted to say. I miss you, and I’m sorry things are off between us, and I wish we could forget it all and go back to normal, and I miss you, I miss you, I miss you. “Thank you,” you said instead, voice soft. “I really appreciate this.”

The look in his eyes dimmed a little but he offered up a smile. He nodded once, said, “Glad to have you here,” and then closed his bedroom door, and leaving you alone with your thoughts.

After showering and unpacking the few things you brought along, you curled up in the foreign bed. The mattress was soft enough though, and the sheets smelled like the soap Joel used. Your body ached from a long day of work, muscles tense and wired from hauling heavy pots around under the sun. Soon enough, you began to relax enough to drift off to sleep. Only a few hours into the night though, your dreams were interrupted by the sound of soft footsteps padding across the landing. A beam of soft yellow light was shone into the room, painting the inside of your eyelids orange. Cracking an eye open, you saw that the door was ajar, and a tall figure was peering in.

“Joel?” you asked groggily, dragging a knuckle over your eyes.

“Yeah, it’s just me,” his deep voice came, but he made no move to enter the room. “Sorry to wake you.”

“Are you okay?”

“Can’t sleep,” he said softly, and your heart clenched.

Pulling the blankets open on the empty side of the bed, you didn’t even think before you said, “Get in.”

Your head fell heavily into the pillows, and sleep tried to pull you back under as you listened to Joel shuffle across the room and slide into the bed beside you. For a moment, he just laid there, a sizeable gap between you on the mattress. And then his warm, firm body was pressing up against your back, his large palm sliding over your hip to rest on your stomach and guide you back against his chest. His scent overwhelmed you, hints of mint and soap and pine tickling your nose, and fuck you had missed him. it was so familiar, and yet your body tingled as if it was the first time he’d ever laid a hand on you. Through the haze that settled over your sleep addled brain, you could feel him, stiff against your thigh.

“Jesus,” you teased drowsily, throwing caution to the wind by rubbing yourself back against him. “Were you having a dream about me or something?”

His nose traced a long down the back of your neck and you fought off a shiver. “Always dream about you.” If you weren’t so tired, that probably would’ve garnered a bigger reaction from you. But as it were, you just brought a hand down to rest over his on your stomach and gripped his fingers softly. “Was thinkin’ bout you being so close, yet still so far. Just down the hall, sleepin’ in my sheets…”

You hummed, warmth flooding your abdomen as he nudged his hips forward, rutting himself against you. His hand drifted out from under yours to slide up underneath your shirt, his thumb stroking the sensitive skin just below your breast.

“Joel,” you murmured, eyelids heavy.

He hummed eagerly, planting a soft kiss underneath your ear.

“I‘m so tired,” you said regretfully. “It’s been a long day – can hardly keep m’eyes open.”

“Let me help you fall asleep,” is all he said, hand now freely roaming over your chest. His thumb lightly brushed the firm peak of your nipple and your whole body shuddered. “Just relax.”

You were vaguely aware of him pulling the covers off you and moving down the bed, dragging soft kisses down your stomach, before dragging your underwear down your legs. Slumping into the soft bed, you allowed your eyes to flutter closed.

Gentle, reverent kisses were pressed over your hip bones as he settled between your legs, pulling one of your thighs up to rest over his shoulder. His long fingers rubbed over the muscles in your leg, pressing down gently when he found knots, pulling deep sighs of contentment out of you.  

“That feels nice,” you whispered into the darkness, and you could’ve sworn you felt him grin against your hip.

When his nose dragged through the dark hair on your mound you twitched slightly, body waking up a little at the sensation. But it was gone as quickly as it came, and you relaxed again, humming lowly as his pressed a kiss against the inner most point of your thigh.

It felt like hours passed with him between your legs. At first you allowed yourself to slip in and out of near sleep, eyes closed as lax puffs of air escaped your mouth while his tongue dipped gently between your folds, giving you soft lazy strokes that warmed your insides. When the first bit of slick began to seep out of you, he groaned gratefully, licking and sucking at your entrance, exulting in your taste.  

It felt like you were dreaming. Laying pliant on the bed, you were fully at his mercy, allowing him to move your legs anyway he wanted to give himself better access. You could vaguely hear him murmuring against your skin, but couldn’t make out the words over your own sighs, smiling sleepily as his tongue lapped against you. He worked slowly, and you realised that it was as much for his enjoyment as it was for your own. You knew by that point how much Joel enjoyed going down on you. He had told you as much on multiple occasions; how he’d love to spend hours with his face trapped between your thighs. But he’d never had the chance, or the patience, to really do it.

The sounds of his enjoyment vibrated against your core, echoing through the room around you. The way he fucking moaned into your cunt never failed to drive you crazy, but in that moment you just smiled at the sound, enjoying how peaceful it was, how sweet.

Every now and then you’d lazily blink your eyes open and look down, expecting that at any moment he’d pull away, be over it. But he never did. Every time you looked his eyes were closed, hands gripping your thighs softly, thumbs stroking rhythmically against your skin as content breaths rushed out of his nose, and you’d close your eyes again, the dark image of him scorched into the inside of your eyelids, never to be forgotten.

You started to feel more awake when he finally gave his undivided attention to the achingly sensitive bundle of nerves at the apex of your core. Moving painfully slow, he glided his firm tongue across your clit, switching it up between swiping back and forth across it and then circling it.

“Oh,” you murmured lowly, voice hoarse from lack of use, but you couldn’t help the soft exclamation as your hips shifted upwards, suddenly searching for more. He didn’t change a thing, pace never increasing or slowing down, and it was perfect.

Your orgasm washed over you in gentle waves. Joel’s tongue swirled slow, gentle circles around your clit and your thighs tensed around his head, fingers reaching down to softly rake through his curls. He hummed happily, tongue lathing against you, enjoying every second of your release. Only pausing once your body stopped twitching and the muscles in your thighs relaxed against him, before kissing way up your stomach, your neck, under he was holding himself over you.

Eyes still closed, your hands drifted to the back of his neck and you pulled him down, his weight crushing against you but you didn’t care. Yours lips met tentatively, and for a moment that was all it was. A soft, gentle kiss. And then you felt him, straining against his briefs, pressed between your thighs, and you pushed your tongue into his mouth. It was messy and slow, tongues tangling together, teeth knocking awkwardly, and you found yourself smiling into his mouth. It should have unnerved you. Should’ve been enough to make you stop, turn your head away and make him fuck you rough so you would forget how intensely intimate the moment felt. But you didn’t.

“You should sleep,” he murmured against your lips, pulling his hips back a little so his erection wasn’t so obvious.

“You should come inside me,” you whispered back, reaching down to grip the band of his underwear and tug them down over his hips. He groaned and kissed you again before reaching down to free himself from the confines of his underwear.  

No other words were exchanged as he adjusted himself, and then he was pressing into you, his needy moans spilling out against your neck while your hand snuck underneath his shirt, fingernails gliding down his back as he filled you completely.

“God, I missed you,” he choked out, voice cracking. You whimpered softly. “You’re so wet.”

“Made me feel so good, Joel,” you preened, kissing the side of his head.

“Yeah?” he pulled his face out of your neck to look at you, and you nodded, staring at him through bleary eyes. Joel kissed you again. A long, yearning kiss that made your heart throb, and it didn’t take long until he was falling apart on top of you, shaking against your arms that wrapped around him, held him against your chest. You whispered praises in his ear as he came, hips grinding into yours, pushing himself so deep inside that it had you gasping into his mouth. It was so unlike any other time you’d ever slept with him, and alarm bells rang somewhere far in the deep recess of your brain, but you ignored them. You’d missed each other, and you’d both earned a little softness after the time apart. And so the two of you fell asleep like that; tangled in each other’s arms, with him still inside you.

You woke up to the sun streaming in through the window. The light was harsh, and you cursed yourself for going to sleep without drawing the curtains. You went to sit up in the bed but stopped suddenly, realising how hot you were. With a soft start, you glanced down and understanding jolted through you like a flash of lightning. Joel’s house, you remembered; you were at Joel’s house. But what you hadn’t expected to find was Joel still in the bed, arms coiled around you like wire while he snored quietly in your ear. For as many times the two of you had slept together, neither of you had ever slept over. It was an unspoken rule, and one that had never been difficult to follow. But he’d broken it… or you’d both broken it, maybe. Keeping your body as still as possible, you found yourself breathing deeply, trying to maintain the allusion of still being asleep to avoid rousing him from his slumber. Frustratingly, your heart pounded in your chest, brain zeroing in on every part of your body that touched his.

His soft lips brushed the back of your neck, heavy breaths puffing against your skin. A solid knee was wedged between your legs, one hand lazily gripping your breast. The insides of your thighs were sticky where his come had leaked out of you overnight, and your eyes widened at the sensation. 

What surprised you the most wasn’t that you didn’t hate waking up with him beside you. No, what surprised you most was that you did like it. In fact, you found yourself longing to relax into his arms and go back to sleep. But common sense reared its head, and you slowly slipped out of his grasp, moving slowly so as not to wake him while you dragged yourself out of the bed. Staring down at Joel, a pang of fondness rush through your chest. Messy curls were strewn across his forehead, plump lips pushed out into a pout as he breathed deeply, hand resting on the empty bed where you had just laid. His breathing hitched momentarily, and you froze, realising how odd it would be for him to wake up and catch you standing there naked, staring. Trying not to give it another thought, you quietly collected some clothes from your bag, and slipped out of the room to start your day.

Hours passed in the greenhouse. You distracted yourself with cucumber seeds and tomato plants, pushing Joel out of your mind as you worked under the sweltering sun. Underneath the glass roof of the nursery, the heat multiplied, and by the time your shift was over you were covered in sweat, shirt ticking uncomfortably tight to your back. You stopped by at the community hall for dinner and ate alone, your brain a whirlwind of thoughts of Joel, Joel, Joel. You couldn’t shake the feeling that had lingered in your bones all day; the aching desire to have stayed in bed with him, to have relaxed into his arms and cuddled him for the rest of the morning. Your best friend, for fuck’s sake.

“Christ,” you mumbled aloud through a mouthful of food, rolling your eyes at yourself.

It felt like you were going crazy, but the worst part was understanding that this must’ve been how he’d been feeling for weeks already.

I’ve never asked you for anything. Not for anything more than what we’ve been doin’, never pushed you for more.

That’s what he’d said, two weeks ago, the day he found out about Peterson. The words played in your head like a mantra. Words that you had firmly avoided bringing up, ones you’d never pushed for an explanation about. You’d chosen to sweep them under the rug, and yet, as hard as you tried, you couldn’t fucking forget them.

By the time you returned to his house you discovered him sitting on the couch downstairs, engrossed in a book. It was the picture of domesticity. The sweet scent of vanilla floated through the air towards you, and you noted the small candle burning on the table beside him.

Staying in Joel’s home, even for just one night, you’d noticed so much more about it than ever before. There was something interesting to look at everywhere you turned, and sweet-scented candles were just the tip of the iceberg. He left random objects littered across countertops, like little treasures for you to stop and inspect during your travels throughout the house. Wood that he’d whittled into interesting shapes, books that he’d read the first few pages of and then abandoned, countless mugs in odd places with dark brown coffee stains at the bottom of them. It was homey, and warm, and subconsciously you found yourself enjoying the insight into his most private space – into the things he did when he was truly alone.

Joel hadn’t noticed you come in, so you seized the opportunity to watch him from the doorway for a moment. He was wearing his comfortable clothes again, and a thin set of reading glasses were perched on the scarred bridge of his nose. A quick flash of heat tore through your stomach. You’d never seen him wear those before, and it had you stumped. The glasses, paired with the salt and pepper through his beard and hair, reminded you of his age. Twenty years older than you, and still the most handsome man you knew.

You finally broke the silence, announcing yourself by asking, “What’re you reading?”

Joel’s head snapped up, and he stared at you over the top of his glasses. Shutting the book quickly, he straightened up on the couch. “Uh, Brave New World,” he lied, flipping the book so you couldn’t see the cover.

You hummed, unconvinced, and bit down on your bottom lip to hide a smirk. Tommy had told you once before that Joel was a sucker for gothic romance novels, but you’d never truly believed him until that moment. From where you stood, you recognised the tattered copy of Wuthering Heights that had gone missing from your bedroom a few months prior.

A flush rose in his cheeks and he coughed awkwardly, picking up a mug that you hadn’t noticed on the floor by his feet. It was cute; a little beige ceramic thing, with an owl painted on it.

“You see the patrol roster for tomorrow?” he spoke into the mug, swiftly changing the subject.

“I did,” you murmured. What you didn’t acknowledge, was that you’d also seen Peterson and Davis’ names on the list for the morning patrol. “Should be nice. We haven’t gone to the ski lodge in a while.”

A vivid memory of you two fucking up there raced through your mind, and a low heat simmered across your face as you remembered Jesse and Dina almost catching you once. Shaking the thought from your mind, you looked at him again to find him gripping the mug tightly, lips pursed in thought.

“We haven’t,” he agreed lowly, and the corner of his mouth twitched a little. “You haven’t been gettin’ called outside the gates much at all these days.”

This is it, you thought hungrily. This is the moment he tells you how he can’t wait to fuck you there tomorrow while you’re supposed to be patrolling. This is the moment he tells you he can’t even wait until tomorrow, and he drags you upstairs to his bed. Warmth flooded through your thighs, and you held your breath, staring at him.

But Joel didn’t say that. Instead, you watched dejectedly from the doorway as he rose slowly from the couch and tucked the tattered book underneath his arm. “Well,” he coughed, turning towards the stairs. “I’m gonna get some shut eye. It’ll be a warm day, and I’d better get some rest before we head out.”

You watched him move towards the stairs, heart beating painfully fast against your ribs.

“I’m actually not tired,” you blurted out. Joel paused. His left hand gripped the banister, and you could’ve sworn it might break in half based on the way his knuckles went white.

“Well, I am,” he said over his shoulder, before padding up towards his room , not even turning to give you a second look.

You tossed and turned for an hour, staring at the ceiling wide awake. The linen sheets stuck to your sweaty skin, making you feel claustrophobic enough to kick them to the end of the bed. You waited for him. Every creak and groan the old house made had your ears twitching, eyes glancing eagerly toward the door, expecting it to creak open and reveal him sneaking in through the darkness.

And when it became clear that he wasn’t coming, you pushed away the uncomfortable feeling it brought, and snaked a hand past the band of your underwear. Your fingers raked over the coarse hair there, teasing yourself for a moment, before you slid a finger through your damp folds. Collecting your slick, you dragged it up to coat your throbbing nerves and sighed in relief.

Your middle finger dragged quick circles over your clit, and all you could picture was Joel above you, fucking you while wearing those stupid fucking glasses. Cursing him in your mind, you pressed a finger past your entrance, and huffed in frustration at how it paled in comparison to the thickness of his digits. You imagined the way the glasses would fall to the tip of his nose, almost falling off his face while he fucked you so hard you saw stars. In an attempt to stifle the soft moans trying to escape your mouth, you bit down on your bottom lip, fingers moving quicker against yourself. And you came like that; hand down your underwear, rubbing yourself frantically, thinking about nothing but him.

It was hot, and the skin of your thighs chafed painfully as you and Joel ambled silently through the stables, getting your horses from their stalls to saddle up. He hadn’t said much to you all morning and you were trying not to read into it, but the fraught silence had you on edge.  

You winced upon spotting Davis and Peterson standing by the gate, chatting while they loaded their rifles. Lloyd caught your eye and smiled, offering a short nod in your direction. You returned the nod before looking back down and fiddling with Japan’s saddle, hoping Joel hadn’t noticed.

“Gimme a sec,” he muttered. “Gotta go pick Jesse’s brain.”

You hummed in acknowledgement and continued tugging on the straps of the saddle, until your skin prickled, a presence looming over your shoulder.

“Should we see if we can swap partners?” that voice sounded, and you turned to see Lloyd smirking suggestively at you. “Send Davis and Miller out East together, and you and me could head to the ski lodge?”

Your palms dampened a little and your eyes darted around the stables. There was no denying that Lloyd Peterson was a handsome guy. He was young, somewhere in his early-twenties. He had bright green eyes that shone in contrast against the dark brown hue of his skin. Straight, bright white teeth almost blinded you whenever he smiled, and you’d have to be a robot not to be effected by it. Past his shoulder, you spotted Joel hovering at the mouth of the stables, gaze trained on the pair of you. Caught, he turned quickly, muttering under his breath as he stalked off toward Jesse.

You looked back to Lloyd and shook your head once. “I don’t think so,” you said. “Gonna stick with Miller today.”

Not giving him much chance to respond, you gripped Japan’s reigns and led her out of the building. Joel and Jesse were talking in hushed tones by the gate, and you walked in their direction, pausing a few metres away when you noticed how tense the conversation seemed to be. Jesse was frowning at the older man, shaking his head slowly.

“Hey,” Lloyd’s voice came again, and you turned with a sigh, raising a hand to block out the sun as you stared up at him. “Can we talk?”

“Talk,” you rushed out, glancing to the side just as Joel appeared beside you, holding out a rifle. You shouldered it quickly, noticing the way Lloyd seemed to balk at the older man’s presence. “Peterson,” you urged, eager to get it over with. “Get on with it.”

He spared another awkward glance at Joel before speaking in a lowered voice. “Did I do something wrong?” You cringed, knowing Joel could hear every word, and yet he didn’t move a muscle. It seemed he wasn’t going anywhere, eyes trained on the man, uninterested in offering the pair of you any privacy to finish your conversation. “I thought we had a good time, y’know? But you’ve been avoiding me.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” you replied plainly, even as the thought of him telling Davis about fucking you flashed through your mind. Joel was deadly quiet, eyes flicking between the pair of you like he was watching a game of tennis. You sighed deeply, wishing this wasn’t happening in front of him. In a moment of almost… shame, you realised that you didn’t want Joel to get the wrong idea. Didn’t want him to think that anything else had happened, or would ever happen, between you and Peterson.

“Then why won’t yo-“

“Why don’t you back off kid,” Joel interrupted suddenly, and your shoulders tensed, skin prickling at his harsh tone. “She’s not interested.”

Lloyd flinched at the words, and he looked to you, waiting for you to say something, to refute Joel’s claim. But you were distracted by the sudden warmth in your abdomen, and when you didn’t react quick enough he scoffed quietly, spinning on his heel and walking back where Davis was waiting with their horses. When you looked at Joel, he had a pleased smirk on his face, and you felt your stomach fall somewhat, guilt spreading through you at the way Lloyd rode out of the settlement without looking back.

The ride to the ski lodge was long. For the most part of the three hour trek, you rode alongside each other in silence, until finally you couldn’t help yourself, thoughts tumbling from your mouth.

“You didn’t have to do that,” you said quietly.

Joel looked at you out of the corner of his eye, and didn’t say a word.

“He was already embarrassed,” you added. His top lip curled up into a mean smirk.

“Peterson’s an ass. He should be embarrassed.”

A huff escaped your mouth and then he was turning, looking at you fully now with his eyebrows pinched together.

“What, your little boyfriend can’t handle some friendly teasin’?” he sneered, the change in mood so sudden you almost fell off your horse. And all the warmth you’d felt, every soft yearning part inside of you toward him, you pushed it to the side and focused on the confusion instead, allowing it to morph into pure anger. You were seeing red; furious with him for never being able to just see reason.

“Oh, fuck off Joel,” you scowled. “I’m not doing this with you today.” You kicked your heel against Japan’s hide and rode ahead, not listening for a reaction.

The higher the pair of you rode up the mountain, the hotter it got. By the time the horses were tied up by a trough of water and the pair of you were walking into the lodge, sweat was rolling down your skin in rivulets. A headache brewed in your temples, and frustration weighed heavily on your chest as Joel huffed and puffed around the room. Even being able to hear his breathing across the room while he scrawled in the logbook was enough to set your skin on edge. Eager to get some space from the tense atmosphere, you gruffly told him that you were taking first patrol, before shouldering your rifle and stalking back outside into the heat.

“You idiot,” you scowled to yourself, storming through the trees. Shame burned in your chest like a wildfire as you thought back to the night before. Touching yourself in his house, making yourself come thinking about him, wondering if he’d fuck you at the ski lodge. God, you felt like a teenager with a hopeless crush.

Your feet planted in the dirt, the word ringing in your head like an alarm. Eyes wide, you gazed into the trees.

“Nope,” you mumbled, starting to walk again slowly. “No, no, no.”

“Y’know they say talkin’ to yourself is the first sign of madness.”

Fuck.

“What are you doing?” you turned quickly, staring him down from through the thick trees. “I told you I’d take first patrol.”

“Yeah, I heard that. Saw you storm off too,” Joel rolled his eyes, propping his hands against his hips. “What’s your problem?”

“Jesus,” you grinned sarcastically. “I should be the one asking that question.”

“The fuck is that supposed to mean?” he frowned, stepping forward. The tan skin of his neck glistened in the sunlight, and you hated yourself for wanting to know how it tasted. Thankfully, hatred and anger were easier emotions to tap into than whatever the fuck you had been feeling about him for the past few weeks.  

“It means,” you ground out. “That you’re a nasty old bastard.” His face darkened, lips twisted into an angry snarl, but you continued. “Peterson’s not my fucking boyfriend, so you can give it a rest okay? I had it handled.”

“Sure,” he laughed bitterly. “Don’t act like you didn’t love it, havin’ him hit on you right in front of me. You get off on the attention, from him and from me. I bet you loved havin’ me step in, tell him to fuck off.”

Your face was on fire as you glared at him, acutely aware of how the tension had spiked between the pair of you. Entire body tensed, you squared your shoulders and stared him down. “Are you fucking serious, Joel?” you asked lowly, eyebrows raising.

“Deadly,” he grit his teeth. “Don’t forget that I know you, baby, better than anyone.”

“No, you fucking don’t,” you spat desperately, turning around and walking quickly in the opposite direction.

“Oh yeah,” he called, the sound of his footsteps following closely behind you making your stomach drop. “Walk away, sunshine. Let’s just not talk about it, right? I know that’s your favourite thing to do. Walk away, and act like nothing happened.”

“Oh my god!” you shouted. “Grow up, you fucking assho-“ But as you spoke, your foot landed awkwardly on a patch of moss. You heard a low popping sound before you shrieked as your legs flew out from underneath you. You hit the ground awkwardly, ass slamming into the ground, and dirt sprayed into the air around you.

“Shit,” you hissed, moving to get up but cringing as a sharp pain shot through your ankle. The flesh around your shin was already swelling, and you cursed audibly, reaching down to rest your hand against it only to wince at the dull pain spreading through your entire foot.

“Jesus Christ,” you heard him say, and then his warm hands were on your shoulders, and he was crouching beside you. Breathing heavily, you stared as your ankle swelled to the size of a golf ball. “Come on, let’s get you back,” Joel said, gripping your elbow to lift you up.

“Get off,” you snapped, shoving him back. He stumbled a little and then stood, glaring down at you. “I can do it myself.”

“Clearly you fuckin’ can’t.”

Eager to prove a point, you dug your fingers into the dirt and pushed yourself up, and then began limping back towards the ski lodge.

You moved slowly with Joel trailing just a few steps behind, close enough that you could hear his breathing, and the way he muttered inaudibly whenever you stumbled. When you almost tripped trying to step over a tree branch, he snapped, appearing at your side in an instant and wrapping an arm around your waist.

“Joel,” you warned lowly, but he interrupted.

“Would you stop bein’ such a brat,” he snarled. “You might’ve broken your fuckin’ ankle, just let me help you god damnit.”

You grumbled under your breath but didn’t fight him again, silently grateful to lean on him and get some weight off the injury. His chest rose and fell quickly as he led you back to the lodge, and you could practically feel the anxiety radiating from him.

“It’s not broken,” you muttered. “Probably just a sprain.”

“Good,” he grunted, helping you up the steps and into the building. “Idiot.”

“Jeez, thanks, Joel,” you said bitterly. “You’re a real pal.”

His hand gripped your waist tighter, before lowering you onto the couch. “Any time, bud.”

Joel stormed into the kitchen and returned moments later with a bottle of water, tossing it at you before slamming down onto the sofa beside you. “Jesse and Dina will be here in a few hours, just keep it elevated until then.”

“You got it doc,” you rolled your eyes, eagerly gulping down the water even though it had gotten uncomfortably warm in his pack.

The pair of you sat in silence for a while, your ankle throbbing where it rested atop the coffee table.  

“I don’t fuckin’ get you,” Joel finally breathed, and you looked to him with a raised eyebrow and a snarky comment on your lips, only to find him with his head tilted back against the couch, eyes closed.

“What?” you asked dumbly.

“You heard me,” he said. “I don’t fuckin’ get you. You go two weeks avoidin’ me, I hardly see you, then you’re knocking on my door, askin’ to stay? And then today you’re cursin’ my goddamn name. Throw me a fuckin’ bone, darlin’, cause I got no idea where I stand with you.”

Your lips parted, all the breath in your lungs rushing out of you in one fell swoop. His eyebrows were furrowed, a deep frown settled across his face, and his arms crossed against his chest. He didn’t look angry, you realised. He looked confused; he looked hurt. Your stomach rolled.

“I could say the same,” you started pathetically, and then his eyes flashed open and he was staring back at you with those dark brown eyes that fucking killed you.

“I don’t know if I can do this anymore,” he said blankly, eyes darting around your face.

Your lips felt numb as you slowly asked, “What?”

“You left,” he said quietly. “You fuckin’ left me, and I just don’t know if I can keep pretendin’ anymore. Pretend that this doesn’t… mean anything to me. Pretend that I’m fine with… this. Don’t know if I can keep doing it if you’re just gonna leave. My heart can’t take it.”

It felt like time stood still for a moment. Outside one of the open windows, you could hear the trees rustling in the hot summer wind. Your ankle ached. Joel kept staring at you.

“You know that’s the best I’ve slept in years?” he asked softly, licking his lips. “Slept so fuckin’ sound with you next to me. No nightmares – hell, I didn’t even dream. And then I woke up, and you were gone, and I almost wished it had never happened. So that I wouldn’t have to know how good it felt to have you, wouldn’t have to try and sleep without you every night after, knowing exactly what I was missing.”

“Joel,” you tried again but he shook his head, raising a hand in the air to stop you.

“Just let me,” he took a deep breath, his shoulders shaking. “Let me say this. Just once, and then I’ll let it be, okay? I won’t bring it up again, and we can go back to the way things were befo-“

“Stop,” you croaked out, tears swimming in your eyes. “Shut up for a second. I,” you paused, eyes darting over his face, searching for understanding. “I didn’t want to leave, okay? But I’m scared Joel. Jesus, I’m so scared of this.”

“Scared?”

“Of this feeling that won’t go away. Of wanting to stay. I’ve been trying to push it down, to ignore it, and it doesn’t fucking work, no matter what I do. I’m so scared that I’ve fucked up our friendship, that I’m going to lose yo-“

“Never,” he shook his head firmly, hand reaching out to squeeze your knee. “Listen, you’re not losin’ me, okay? That's never gonna happen.”

“But Joel,” you sighed shakily. “If we push things further, there’s no going back. Don’t you understand?”

“I think it’s a little late for that,” he admitted quietly. “I think it’s been too late for me for a while now.”

You stared at him with wide eyes, and when you spoke again you could hear the fear in your voice. “I don’t know if I can be what you want.”

Joel chuckled humourlessly and sighed, squeezing your thigh again.

“It’s you,” he said. “That’s what I want. You don’t have to do anythin’, don’t have to change or be anythin’ else. I just want you.” His eyes shone in earnest, and you couldn’t help but surge forward, planting your lips against his. He returned the kiss with fervour, parting your lips with his tongue and gripping the sides of your face in a searing grip.

He tasted like salt and mint and your head was swimming, consumed by him. Your fingertips were numb as they raced over his body, desperate to touch him everywhere all at once. You fumbled with the buttons on his shirt until his hands joined yours, carefully undoing them all until you could pry it off him.

Pulling back from the kiss, you allowed your eyes to rake over his exposed chest, taking in the sight of his tanned, hairy chest, littered with scars and freckles and you felt the urge to kiss every single one of them. So you did. You pushed him back into the couch and straddled him, ignoring the way your ankle cried out at the movement, and attached your lips to his collarbone, licking and sucking your way across his torso. Showing reverence to every imperfection on his skin. Your tongue swiped past one of his nipples and he jolted beneath you, hands dragging under the fabric of your shirt to rest on your back. You could feel him growing hard beneath you and you smiled against his skin before rolling your hips down against his. He was murmuring your name in between sighs, scratching at your skin, revelling in the kisses you sponged across his chest.

Your eyes trailed upwards to meet his. “Want your cock in my mouth,” you whispered, and his face crumpled in on itself, eyes rolling back into his head.

“Fuck,” he sighed, gripping your hands tightly before pushing you off him. He stood up and in one quick movement he knocked the coffee table over, before he was undoing his belt and stripping his pants off. He helped you off the couch slowly, before lowering you down onto the carpet, crouching down to rest beside you. His large hands roamed across your chest, gripping the hem of your shirt and tugging it upward to expose your breasts, your aching nipples peaked and begging to be touched.

“Fuck,” he repeated, harsher this time, leaning over you to plant his mouth on your chest. His teeth scraped across your sensitive skin and you whined, gripping the nape of his neck as he took one of your nipples into his mouth and sucked gently.

“Joel,” you mewled, tugging his face back up to yours for a brief kiss. “I mean it,” you breathed into his mouth. “Need you in my mouth so bad. M’gonna make you feel so good, I swear.” Within a second, he flipped the two of you over so his back was against the ground and you were straddling his hips. You grinned triumphantly, shifting your hips back as you kissed down his chest, moving your body down until you were straddling his shins, and pulling his briefs down with you.

His cock rested proudly against his stomach, thick and swollen and begging to be touched. The head was a deep shade of red, small beads of precum weeping out of his tip as he stared at you, patiently waiting for you to make a move. You didn’t waste a second before leaning down and gliding your tongue softly over the tip, swiping up his salt and humming at the taste. A sharp inhale whistled past his teeth, and you watched his eyes clamp shut at the sensation, hand forming a fist at his side. Gently, you took his hand and raised it to your head, encouraging him to touch you. He obliged, fisting your hair in his hand, grip tightening as you parted your lips around him and let him sink into your warm mouth. A long, drawn-out moan left his mouth and your cunt pulsed in response, the warmth between your thighs suddenly impossible to ignore.

“S-so good for me,” he groaned, pulling your hair tighter. “Love your mouth, I love it. That’s it, baby, open up a little more for me, show me how much you can take.”

The sharp sting on your scalp made you moan around him, and he cursed, undoubtedly feeling the vibration. The weight of him against your tongue was intoxicating, and you bobbed your head up and down slowly, his cock gliding in and out of your mouth easily, slick with your spit. You’d missed the taste of him, missed the sensation of him filling you up to the point where it was hard to breathe, and yet you still wanted more. You pressed forward, eager to feel him fill you up, but when his cock brushed the back of your throat he was gripping your hair and pulling you off him.

“Turn around,” he ordered, and you looked up in confusion. His bottom lip was bitten raw, and his eyes were a darker brown than normal as he gazed at you. When you didn’t move, he was pulling you up and turning your body so your back was to him, and only then did you realise what he meant. He pulled your shorts down your legs, dragging your underwear with them, and then he carefully tugged one of your knees up and over his shoulder, so you were straddling his chest. Slowly, you shuffled back on your knees until your wet heat was hovering over his face, and you leaned down to let your chest rest against his.

“Baby,” Joel sighed. “So fuckin’ perfect. Such a pretty pussy. Can never get enough of you.”

You clenched around nothing, and heard him groan, signalling that he’d seen it. Without warning, his tongue dipped between your folds and you gasped, pushing your hips back to give him a better angle, before taking him back into your mouth. And it was nothing like it had been two nights before. He wasn’t gentle, or slow, or relaxed. No, Joel was relentless.

His tongue moved rhythmically against you, and you tried desperately to focus, harsh breaths leaving your nose as you moved your mouth lazily along his length. You pulled back and lathed your tongue around the head of him, tasting the salt that dripped out of him. He grunted into you and you smiled, stroking him slowly as you sucked the tip, grinding your tongue into the sensitive skin just underneath his head. Joel’s hips bucked up off the ground, and your hand left his length, gripping his waist firmly to hold him down while you took him into your mouth again. You pushed yourself as far as you could, eyes closed and eyebrows furrowed as he brushed the back of your throat. His beard scratched against your inner thighs deliciously, and you decided you loved it a little longer. And then suddenly, his tongue moved away from your clit and he was licking broad strokes along the entirety of your core, and then over your entrance, and then… his tongue flicked all the way back and into new territory.

You flinched forward, his cock surging deeper into your throat and you gagged around him as you explored the new feeling. You moaned, eyes screwing shut at the foreign sensation, and you felt your legs begin to shake against his sides. His hands gripped your hips and pulled you down harder against his face, ruthlessly dragging his tongue back and forth from your clit to your hole, until you were tearing your mouth away him and sitting up, grinding yourself down desperately against his face. Arching your back, you writhed on top of him, crying out hoarsely. Every strong flick of his tongue felt like an electric shock jolting through your body, and he continued until you were panting and twitching on top of him, and then you let go. The orgasm tore through you, a shout falling from your lips as you rode his face, gripping his thighs for leverage as your entire body shuddered with the intensity. He didn’t let up; licking and sucking and kissing, his moans vibrating through your core until you were whimpering and dragging yourself off him, clit aching from the pressure.

You were still trembling with the aftershocks of your orgasm when Joel pressed your back down onto the carpet, nudged your knees apart so he could fit between them, and pushed himself inside you. A sweet, low burn blazed in your abdomen with every inch he gave to you. The wet sound of you sucking him in might have embarrassed you, but the look of awe on his face as he stared down at where you were connected just made you feel powerful.

His thrusts were strong, the sweaty skin of your thighs smacking against each other noisily filling the air, mixing with your breathless moans of his name.

“So fuckin’ tight,” he was saying, but you weren’t listening, eyes rolling back in your head as he played with your nipples, pinching and rolling them between his fingers.

“Fuck, Joel,” you cried out at a particularly hard thrust, stomach tensing as the head of his cock grinded against your g-spot.

“There?” he panted, and you nodded frantically, mouth hanging open as he pressed against it over and over again, groaning at the way you tensed around him.

Urgent sounds left your lips as you felt yourself nearing the edge again, and you watched with wide eyes as his hand trailed down your chest to rest over your mound, his thumb slipping between your folds to press gently against your throbbing clit. Your back arched up from the ground and you choked out a moan as he rubbed you in slow circles, a stark contrast to the way he drilled into you with his cock.  

“Come,” Joel encouraged and you whimpered, eyes screwing shut as the overwhelming feeling soared through you. His free hand landed over your throat and your eyes flew open, looking up at him as he applied soft pressure to the sides of your neck. “C’mon baby, let me have it. I can feel you, you’re so fuckin’ close, give it to me, please, I want it.”

His words pushed you over the edge, and you gasped against his hold, bucking up into him as he fucked you roughly. You twitched and writhed on the ground, his thumb never stopping its movements against your clit as you cried out his name.

And somewhere amidst it all, his movements slowed. His hands turned soft on your body, head dropping down to drag gentle wet kisses along the skin of your neck.  

“So good,” he praised lowly. “So beautiful.” Your heart soared in your chest, and you smiled drowsily, body tingling as he continued to give you gentle thrusts.  

“Kiss me,” you said shyly, and Joel smiled, leaning down to press his lips to yours. You sighed into his mouth, gliding the tip of your tongue along his bottom lip as you draped your heavy arms around his neck, pinning his torso down against yours. “Fuck me like this,” you told him. “Want to feel you close to me.”

He nodded, starting up a slow rhythm, only ever pulling out halfway before pressing back into you. You were both slick with sweat, and you wiped his forehead gently before raking your fingers through his thick messy curls. His face was red from exertion, and you thumbed his cheekbones gently. A heavy sigh fell from your mouth. Still recovering from your previous orgasm, you knew it wouldn’t be hard for him to build you up for another one.

“Give me one more,” he begged, sponging feather light kisses over your eyelids, your cheeks, down your neck. “Want to feel you come with me, baby, please. Just one more, I know you can.”

You gripped his hair and kissed him deeply, your tongues tangling together as he moved his hips slowly, cock dragging in and out of you at a devastating pace. Joel pulled back to watch you, eyes gazing down with adoration as he moved above you. That familiar liquid heat began to burn in your stomach, curling through every fibre of your being, and you could see in his face that he was close. And there was something else there too. Something you couldn’t place; simmering in his eyes, lingering on the tip of his tongue, begging to be said. His hips began to stutter against yours, a choked gasp of your name falling from his lips as he quickened his pace until you were coming together, holding each other tightly on the ground of the ski lodge. He moaned heavily against your mouth, and you throbbed around him as his spend coated your walls, warm and slick, squeezing out around his cock as he moved.

As a low, warm silence filled the room, you worked to control your breathing, body shaking against his as he pulled out of you. You whimpered at the empty feeling, missing the weight of him already. But he didn’t go far.

Joel laid down on the carpet beside you, draping an arm around your shoulders and tugging you into his chest. Your fingers trailed over the skin of his stomach, smiling at the goosebumps that developed in your wake. Mine.

His hand caught yours and he lifted it to his mouth, kissing the back of it gently. You leaned forward to rest your face in the rook of his neck, and he sighed in contentment, trailing his fingers down your back.

“Hey Joel?” you murmured against his skin.

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry I called you a nasty old bastard.”

Joel laughed and tightened his grip around your back, tugging you closer to his chest. “I forgive you.”

#joel miller #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller smut #fwb joel #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfic #the last of us #tlou #the last of us fanfiction #my writing #bite the bullet #cat's outta the bag #don't cry over spilt milk #whole new can of worms

[evanpeterswhoresblog]

I love your fics omg you're so talented

Can you make an adult world fic? Alex obviously. Like reader is working with him and Alex keeps pushing vibrators on her skin and laughing n stuff. Then she's sick of his shit right so then she goes to the back and does her thing out there but Alex keeps teasing her and he goes out back with her and he starts to like rub himself on her and put her hand on his boner. Stuff like that. Kinda non con but the reader likes it she just doesn't want to admit it.

Can you make Alex make the reader give him head too? If it's too much just do the teasing. Luv u <3

i tried my best to make this fit your request i hope i did alright, i’ve never really written anything non con i don’t even know if this fits as the category lol but either way hope you enjoy :)

~~~

The Late Shift

Alex (Adult World) x f!reader

warnings: smut, unprotected p in v, slight non con, oral male receiving, sex toys (not used for sex tho), pretty rough sex tbh, lmk what else if i missed any

summary: as you and alex are doing your last work for the night, things take a different turn than what you expected…

word count: 2.2k

~~~

You’ve never been big on sex. You like it of course. But you’ve never been one to experiment with sex toys or watch a ton of porn. So how you ended up working for a sex shop is a mystery. You were desperate for a job, and Adult World happened to be the closest, easiest place hiring. It’s been an easy job, for the most part. Except for one thing.

Your manager.

Alex is a good person, he’s funny, kind, and when you’re confused on anything he’s a great help. The only issue is how fucking attracted you are to him. You swear he’s the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen. His dark curly hair, dark mysterious eyes, he’s perfect. You’ve never wanted a guy more than you want Alex. It makes working with him hard, but so far, you’ve managed. Barely.

Right now, the two of you are unpacking new sex toys for the store. You talk casually, but you focus more of your attention on the crazy shapes and sizes these dildos are. Alex must notice your surprise.

“Would you ever use one of these?” He asks, holding up a glass dildo with patterns on it.

You chuckle. “I think that thing would tear me apart.”

“I’ve seen girls stick way crazier things up their pussy’s, like food and shit,” Alex replies with a laugh.

“So that’s what you jerk off to? Good to know,” you tease.

“Yeah, I bet you wanted to know. Just so you know, ff I go searching tomorrow night and find a video of you sticking a cucumber up your pussy, I’ll cum so hard.”

You feel your cheeks go red at his comment but keep your composer. Sometimes Alex says things that make you a little uncomfortable, but you know it’s all jokes so you don’t care too much. Plus, it gives you hope that maybe he has the same feelings for you.

“Hey y/n, get a look at this,” Alex says.

Before you can look you feel the vibrations on your skin. You flinch and push Alex’s hand away, but he keeps putting the vibrator on you. He’s laughing, you’re not. You don’t find his distractions entertaining right now. After a few seconds of this you slap the vibrator out of his hand and glare at him.

“Stop Alex, I’m trying to work,” you snap. He keeps laughing and with each second that passes you become more annoyed.

“It’s just a joke calm your tits. I’m the manager dude it’s not like we’re gonna get in trouble for talking,” he replies.

You huff. “Just, stop okay.”

“How about you stop being such a buzz kill,” he mumbles under his breath.

You ignore his comment and continue to unpack. Things are calm for a few minutes, before Alex gets his hands on another vibrator. He presses it against your cheek this time. You immediately slap his hand away again, but this time you stand up and try your hardest not to lose your cool. He looks up at you, about to speak, but you cut him off before he can.

“I’m gonna take this box out to the garbage,” you say, picking up an empty box that once contained a number of dildos and walking to the back door without listening to his reply.

You wonder why he’s being so difficult tonight. He typically talks a lot during your shifts together, but this is different. Usually, his jokes and comments aren’t too bad, why’s tonight different? You get to the back of the store quick and stuff the box into the dumpster. When that’s done you lean back on the brick wall, a sigh escapes your lips at the silence, it’s nice not hearing Alex’s voice. You grab your phone out of your pocket and start to text your friends back.

Sadly, your peace is interrupted after only five minutes. Alex calls your name from the door, telling you to come back in and help him finish before you guys have to close up. You silently curse but follow his instructions. You feel a bit bad; you know he’s not trying to make you upset, but he just is. You promise yourself you’ll try your hardest to tolerate him, after all you only have an hour left till the store closes. You can suck it up.

You’re walking down one of the aisles when Alex appears in front of you. You give him a small smile. You feel worse looking at his innocent face. Maybe you were overreacting.

“Sorry for walking out, I’m just tired and I want to go home,” you apologize.

“I get it, I’m sorry if I was being annoying, I really like making you laugh. Sometimes I try too hard,” he replies with a small laugh.

You smile. “That’s sweet.”

“You think so?”

You begin to walk toward him, toward the last unopened boxes. “Of course, I’m very flattered you enjoy my laughter. But anyway, how about we speed through the last of the boxes and go home early? You think they’ll notice?”

“Probably not,” he answers.

You’re close enough to him that you expect him to move aside so you can go to the unfinished work, but he doesn’t. Instead of moving he simply stares down at you, a strange look in his eyes. You know that look, you’ve looked at him like that. He wants you. If it were any other day, you’d be ecstatic. But right now, all you want to do is finish the tasks and go home. You look around him, trying to signal that you want him to move. He doesn’t.

“So, let's get this shit over with,” you say, clear as day about what you want.

He still doesn’t move. “You know y/n, you’re more fun when you aren’t taking this job seriously.” He steps closer to you, only a foot now separating the two of you. “I want that version of you right now.”

You laugh awkwardly. “Come on Alex, I just want to go home.”

“I’ll be quick, but I assumed you wanted something that would last longer.”

He puts his hands on your shoulders and backs you up against a shelf. Your heart rate quickens, is this real? You stare into his eyes, a confused expression on your face. You’ve had dreams of this happening, but in all of them you wanted it, right now you don’t exactly want it.

“Alex...” you say. “What are you doing?”

“Don’t play coy, I’ve seen the way you look at me. I know you want this too,” he answers, his lips curling up into a devilish smirk. He presses his body against you and you feel how hard he is, it makes you gasp. “I want it really bad.”

You don’t know what to say. Part of you wants to push him off you and run out of the store, but another part of you wants to see where this goes. You feel him start to rub himself against your leg, it makes you feel paralyzed. He’s too strong to push away, you think. It would be useless to try. So, you realize your fate lies with what Alex chooses to do.

He leans his head down, softly pressing his lips against yours. You can’t deny how long you’ve wanted this to happen. You just wish it wasn’t happening right this second. Nevertheless, you kiss him back, your mind adjusting to the knowledge that this is going to happen. You let him grope your breasts, squeezing and massaging them through your shirt. You even let him scoop you up in his arms and carry you to one of the desks in the back office. Though, you didn’t have much of a choice to start with.

He lays you down on a desk, his lips moving feverishly with yours. You can’t keep it together. His lips are moving so aggressively, they’re so soft. He bites down on your bottom lip and you groan into his mouth, the pain making that feeling between your thighs grow. He pulls his lips away and starts to kiss down your neck, leaving hickeys behind as he takes your delicate skin into his mouth. You throw your head back and moan, he pushes your knees apart and fills the space with his body.

“Alex... are there any cameras back here?” You ask, your breath ragged as he sucks a spot near your collar bone.

“Course not,” he answers in a hushed tone.

“Are you sure we should be doing this? What if someone comes in?” You’re second guessing this, maybe you should’ve protested more. The last thing you want is to have a customer come in and catch this.

“Just be quiet y/n it’s fine,” he responds.

You’re about to speak again, but that’s when he starts to rub one of his hands up your thigh and right between your thighs. You moan again as he starts to rub you through your pants. He knows exactly what he’s doing and it makes you feel like your body is floating.

He trails his kisses back up your neck until he catches your lips again. You kiss him hard, your arms wrapping around his neck and pulling him closer. You buck your hips; you need more pressure. Alex understands this and presses his fingers harder on your jeans right over your clit. You’re so wet, you need him. You’ve never felt such desire for another human being.

“I want you to do something for me,” Alex says against your lips.

“Anything,” you reply without thinking, you’re too wrapped up on how good he’s rubbing you.

He pulls back and you open your eyes, he’s unbuckling his belt. You sit up on your elbows and watch as he pulls down his jeans, his hard cock very noticeable. He grabs your hands and pulls you forward till you’re off the desk. You’re confused until he pushes you down onto your knees, his crotch right in front of your face. You look up at him, he brushed a hand though your hair.

You don’t really want to suck his dick, but you’re too afraid of him forcing you that you don’t object. Instead, you pull him boxers down and stoke him gently. He sighs in pleasure and continues to brush his fingers through your hair. You don’t waste any more time. You start by slowly swirling your tongue around his tip, enjoying the way he whispers your name. After that, you lick down his shaft, you don’t like when dicks are dry down your throat.

Soon enough you’re deepthroating him, practically gagging on his dick. He’s a moaning mess, both his hands tangled in your hair. You don’t mind it as much as earlier. You even enjoy certain parts. Like how when you move your tongue as you suck, he’ll praise you, or how when you tighten your lips around him, he groans. With each sound that leaves him your panties become more and more wet.

When he’s close to cumming he pushes you off him, telling you to take your clothes off and lay back down on the desk. You do exactly as he says and before long, he’s back between your thighs, leaving wet kisses all over your body. You can’t handle how much you need him. The heart beat between your legs is all you can think of, and when he brushes his tip between your soaked folds you almost moan.

You grip his shoulders, your eyes locked on his. “Alex just fuck me already.”

“Someone’s needy,” he mumbled, his tone sending tingles throughout your body. He positions his tip at your entrance and leans down to connect your lips. “But your wish is my command.”

With that, he begins to fuck you. Your eyes roll to the back of your head, your nails digging into his shoulders. He thrusts at a pace that makes your toes curl. It’s so hard, so deep, so perfect. The desk rocks so hard you think the legs might break. You don’t even care. All you care about is that Alex doesn’t stop, not for anything.

He does though, but for a good reason. He pulls out of you and before you can even question it, he grabs you, flips you, and bends you over the edge of the desk. He resumes his thrusts, and you can’t help but moan loud enough that anyone in the store would be able to hear. You almost scream when he grabs your hips and pulls you back, his dick hitting right on your cervix over and over again. It’s almost too much for you to take.

He leans down after a few minutes and whispers in your ear, “You feel so fucking good y/n, it’s so hard not to cum.”

“Alex,” you moan.

“Are you close baby?” He breathes.

“Yes, please keep going,” you answer.

In minutes you cum so hard you swear you see stars. You moan Alex’s name so loud you’re sure everyone in the building next door can hear you. It’s the best feeling of your life. Your legs give out, Alex has to hold you up. Your nails dig into the desk, your whole face turns red, and you feel those orgasmic pulses throughout your entire body. He cums soon after you, pulling out and spilling his seed onto your back. You’re grateful, you forgot to tell him you weren’t on the pill.

“Well,” he says as you’re both still trying to catch your breath. “That was definitely better than unpacking those boxes.”

#writing #evan peters #evan peters smut #evan peters x reader #fanfiction #james march x reader #jimmy darling #kai anderson #kit walker #tate langdon #alex adult world #alex x reader #adult world #tate langdon smut #smut #evan peters fic #working #i love this #kyle spencer #kyle spencer smut #ahs fanfic #ahs murder house #ahs asylum #ahs smut #kit walker smut #smut prompts

[sugawarassoulmate]

im foing thru a bully!osamu brain rot so imagine samu pissing reader off somehow (like collaterally: i imagine him fucking up and KNOWING he fucked up) n is trying to do some damage control by being the sweetest he's ever been I JUST WANT TO SEE HIM GROVEL

i Imagine him to be piss scared at the prospect of u ever breaking up w him over smth he did jendkd

i am incapable of not writing a happy ending for these two idiots

words: 805 cw: fem!reader, post-love confession bully!osamu, jealousy, arguing, insecurity, implied breakup, sfw but minors dni always

honestly, bully!osamu's biggest problem is his jealousy and it's something he still struggles with even after you become official. at first, you kind of deal with it, but as his girlfriend now, you wish he'd trust you enough and get over it.

"i'm tired of having the same argument with you, again and again, samu," you finally said after so much back and forth.

he really did it this time.

you and a classmate were working on a project together worth a big part of your final mark, which obviously meant spending a lot of time together. of course, osamu had a problem with it since it was a guy.

you tried to be understanding—you texted samu every time you were with him and you always did work in the library so you two would never be totally alone. but that wasn't enough for osamu. he still found a way to get upset and grill your partner to the point where he was considering talking to your professor about working with someone else.

when he apologized for it, you, you'll admit you blew up on him a bit.

"it's not just about the stupid project, samu. but thanks soooo much for making that situation harder than it needed to be," you snap, taking him by surprise since you've never raised your voice at him.

"but what's gonna happen in the future? do you just not trust me? i'm sick of feeling guilty about something that it's my fault." after stopping for a moment and catching your breath before sighing. "sometimes i think you're never going to change..."

and osamu doesn't like that. the way the tone of your voice changed just then. panic immediately sets in when you leave the room without looking back at him.

he goes into damage control, but he isn't sure what to do. osamu's never been one to apologize before and if he did, it wasn't in words. he's pretty sure cooking a meal or fucking you won't get him out of this one.

he asks no begs for your forgiveness. it's so stupid, of course, he trusts you. sometimes osamu gets in his own head and doesn't want anyone to have you, but that's immature of him.

osamu gives you some space before he apologizes—holding onto your waist as he tells you how right you are and how he's going to make things right. first, he goes to your project partner and apologizes to him as well (it stings to do so, but osamu knows it's right)

your partner accepts and agrees to continue working with you so neither of your grades is jeopardized. but osamu knows it's not enough.

it starts with breakfast in the morning because hey, he's gifted with amazing cooking skills and he's gonna use them. osamu makes your favorite and serves it to you in bed.

the stern smile on your face tells him that you appreciate the gesture but you're still upset, which he expected.

for the record, miya osamu does not grovel, but he'd be lying if he said your words didn't scare him a little bit. sucking up his pride, osamu kneels next to the bed and takes one of your hands.

"i do trust you, baby," he breathes, choosing his words carefully so as to not upset you.

you pick at the food sitting on the tray. "it doesn't feel like you do sometimes. and it's not just my project partner, but it's our friends. i can see you getting uncomfortable when suna's around and — fuck, samu sometimes i swear you think i'm gonna run off with your brother or something."

ok, that hurt, but he deserves it.

he takes another deep breath. "i will work on it. yer my girlfriend and i trust ya," he says with a steady voice. "and next time i'm bothered by somethin', i'll talk to ya instead of lashin' out."

that perks you up a bit. "and?"

"and...i'll be better about you hangin' out with tsumu and suna. they're yer friends too and i shouldn't be so possessive."

finally, finally you give him a smile, leaning over for a quick kiss. "samu, was that so hard?" you said, running your fingers through his hair. "that's all i want to hear."

for the first time, osamu can breathe easy. the sweetness in your voice is back and you're actually eating his food — a sight he'll never get tired of. "shit, baby, ya had me scared for a second,”

your eyes harden for just a moment. “don’t get too comfortable, samu. changed behavior means more than just an apology.”

and just like that your smile is back, the revolving door of emotion gives osamu whiplash that he’s never experienced before, but he’s more than willing to work on himself if it means you’ll stay.

©sugawarassoulmate 2022 all rights reserved - please do not repost/translate my work on other platforms!

#haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #osamu x reader #osamu miya x reader #miya osamu x reader #osamu #osamu miya #🍑 #🍑osamu #bully!osamu

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

Okay I've read through the entirety of the Yves tag and I've come the conclusion, and I'm speaking for myself here: we ain't compatible ✨

And I know the response to that would be "well he did all this research on you, he can just change himself to be compatible" and that's exactly why this cannot work. I don't want what he thinks I want, I want the truth. I want the real, unfiltered him, but he would never give that to me. He would fold and play a character and that doesn't sit right with me, especially if I ever find out about his database. He's just a liquid taking the shape of my container. So squishy. I need a fellow solid.

All this talk of him providing for you, listening to you, comforting you. Relationships are a two way street, when would he ever let us provide the same things to him? I wanna rub his back when he feels it ache, I wanna hold his hair up while he voms in the toilet, I wanna cook him soup as he lays in bed sick, I wanna hold him in the night when he gets nightmares, but he never lets us in on anything about him!

Also his way of finding information about us doesn't hit the spot. Why are you asking my relatives questions and snooping through my Internet history? I'm right here! Ask me! This circles back to what I said before, I want to know about him the same way he wants to know about me!

And even the real parts of him that he does share, I'm not compatible with! I'm not okay with not knowing anything about him like his age or last name. Even if he was an eldrich being, I wanna know! As his s/o I should be the one person in the world who gets to know!

And he doesn't want children, so I would never have a child with him, because I do not want to bring a life into this world of they will not receive the full love of both parents. But I want children. And he would give me children if I want, but I don't want them if he's not going to be a loving parent, and if he's not going to be a loving parent, then I will raise them by myself, and if I'm raising them by myself, I might as well not be with him. So the simplest answer is to not have children in the first place. But I want children.

Another thing is the house. He dislikes it when we change anything so he has an extra room for us to do whatever we want in. This does not set well with me! This is not our home, this is HIS home and we just get a little corner to ourself. What's the difference between living with him and living with your parents? Now I could express this to him, and he might allow us to add things to the rest of the house to make it look like there is more than one person living here, but we know that he would hate it not being in the pristine state it was in. I don't want to make him uncomfortable in his own house when he pays all the bills and owns everything. So I won't ask that of him. But I will be miserable.

And god dammit if I bite you, I want you to bite back! I want to rough house every once in a while! I want to argue! I want everything you have! Not just what you think I like! And if you can't get me that, then we're gonna have to call it quits! Take that into consideration for your research!

"but he's a yandere" then I hope he's happy with me being miserable! (Once again, I am strictly speaking about myself. If you can overlook these things, power to you!)

well like he wont,, necessarily change himself entirely, like what u basically described is stuff that he is hard set on not changing, so the path of least resistance is changing you. n that is horrifying ngl and hot 2 me, so id say he has a squishy exterior like idk 3 inches deep, but then its pure solid steel underneathx

oh yea he lieks playing caregiver, he doestn necessarily hate being taken care of its just he thinkgs is unnecessary especially hes probably not human, and he is built that way bro like hes technically v v low maintenance!!! and eugh authenticity gross me out </3 like why be real when u can eat this ass like groceries ykno what i mean

mans will ask u stuff to like wanna know u thats for sure, the onlyy things is that he already knows what ur gonna say or determine what u said is half truth, lie or like an embellishment- so there's a huge illusion of trust there, he already seen the spoilers to ur life bro he just wanna watch the movie again from like a different website

no bro u got the child thing all wrong  😭 he is not letting you take care of ur child, like he will raise them even though he hates them , just in his special grotesque Yves-ness way, and yea i get it, to a lotttt of people the topic of wanting children is a deal breaker 4 them. I the author personally do not want kids hence my projection on him <3

oh yeah mans a control freak for his house , don't know if u read "yves in a nutshell" , but basically he's like parallel to a parent on the stricter side that mostly caters 2 ppl who have this flavour of daddy issues who wants a more controlling zaddyy in their life but he would be discrete about it

trust me man he will not sit there and be uncomfortable, he will straight up tell u what he thinks about ur decor but in a loving way, like negotiate with u to keep it in ur room, but if u insist on doing ur way he will resort to scolding, then finally: literal brainwashing

ough no mans does not like arguing he will fr go MKUltra on ur ass if ur the type to like roughhousing, Yves is literally a librarian that want no rowdyness, nuh uh he wants quiet

like fr the point of Yves is that he is the manifestation of obsessive gentle parenting featuring old school CIA torture techniques with a cameo of suffocating parental trauma, its mostly delicious to us parental issues people and i think ur seeing Yvess too much as a partner like an equal  when he is not meant to be an equal AT ALL😭 whereas he is ironically meant to be objectified to be confined to this one slave that is a caretaker, lover and a protector who knows how to say no sometimes

like fr thanks tho for reading my stuff, but yeaahhhh that is 4 sho ur not gonna be compatible with Yves or any of my OCs, like ur too selfless, kind, independent and loving for my Yanderes </3.

also are u by chance the one ghostliking my stuff

#oc yves #yandere oc #yandere male #yandere x reader

[darklordofthesimp]

hahahaha…. hi lordddd….. i missed u within the two hours i’ve been gone…..

i TOLD u, ur taking up my thoughts…. and now i’m building onto teslatoasters submission with Königs Pov of birdy ditchin that mfs ass……..

you know i have to do prices…. ahaha…. haaaa….

GIGGLING THIS ONES GONNA BE SO FUN

switching up formats like my emotional irregularities switch up on me

—

Birdy was sitting by themself, picking at their cuticles and staring at nothingness.

The room around them was quaint. Homely, they would say.

Books lined the shelves in an unorthodox pattern.

Light warm and yellow, Fire dancing in their peripherals.

And a pretty red rug detailed with gold mandalas.

If they had the mind capacity to focus on any detail right now, Birdy would see that almost all the book spines were cracked. Some fraying from repeated use.

They heaved a shaking sigh. The air around them was warm from fire, despite the chill of winter creeping through the thin walls.

Birdy leaned back into the softened leather lounge, reaching for their coffee resting on the small oak table in front of them.

Their hands shook as they drank, nerves at a constant despite knowing there was nothing happening.

Once again, the feeling of liminality creeped back in.

Maybe they had a knack for sensing when something was stirring.

No, nevermind. Then they wouldn’t have stitches holding their jaw in place.

Birdy set their cup back on the napkin-turned-coaster, huffed a breath of phantom pain in their abdomen, and willed themself to calm the fuck down.

Nothing will happen.

At that thought, a door slammed open.

Birdy startled.

So much for that.

“What the fuck is this.”

He threw something on the coffee table.

Price was heaving, borderline panting his breaths. His voice was hoarse and mean, with a hint of terror chipping away at his stern demeanour.

“Didn’t know you were suddenly illiterate. My condolences.”

Maybe if they were sarcastic enough it would stop the guilt clawing at their lungs, tearing the flesh to make way for the blood threatening to choke them alive.

Though it was a bit mean.

Prices face twisted from anger to hurt back to anger in a few slow seconds. Birdy felt sick.

“What..,” He cut himself off. His voice a cracked whine as he cleared his throat. He was your superior. If I don’t allow it, it doesn’t happen.

“I’m not signing this.” His hands gestured violently towards the pink paper slipping out of a cream manila folder. Looking perfectly innocent on the coffee table.

“You don’t need to sign it. It’s not a resignation slip. It’s a notice. I leave on Saturday.”

Birdy sat back with their arms crossed against their chest, hand landing on their heart. Right as a pang shot through it.

Their hand twitched.

Be a cunt, they thought. Be a bastard, or you’ll cry. Be angry, or you’ll break down.

Prices breath caught in his throat, posture straightening enough to make an etiquette professionals eyebrows raise.

Maybe he had the same thought.

“You’re not leaving. I don’t allow it. There will be no transfer whilst I’m your captain.”

The way he spoke to them was that of a scared father.

Neither of them acknowledged it.

Birdy stood, bones creaking in prostest at the sudden strain on their joints.

From his side of the coffee table, Price watches them in earnest. Please, please for the love of god. Please don’t take them away from me.

Birdy couldn’t even look him in the eye. Couldn’t face him head on as they picked up the folder, forcing it into his bubble for him to grab.

His hands shook, just like theirs.

Please don’t do this.

“You have no say.” Birdy shuffled on their feet, uncomfortable, guilty.

The feeling at being on this side of the hurt was making bile rise to their throat. They wanted to shove their finger down their own throat just to get ride of it.

Panic turned fear to

“I have every fucking say. In everything. There is nothing that doesn’t fucking go through me first. You are not fucking leaving.”

His words were rushed as Birdy side stepped the table, heading determinedly for the door. They need to get out.

They needed to breathe.

A hand snatched at birdys wrist, not hard, but firm. It wasn’t to cause harm, but to make them stop, think, stay, please stay.

They whipped their head around to face Price. Mean and unforgiving. Their culpability smothered by their pride to keep face.

“No, you don’t have a damn say.” Wrenching their hand out of his dying grasp they continued, “Shepherd signed. The transfer request was accepted yesterday. I’m going back to the SARS.”

The finality im their voice, posture, in them was heart shattering for him.

He’d failed.

The strength of his resolve was plucked away like feathers. And with the weight of Shepherd holding him down, he couldn’t do anything but watch it happen in front of him.

“No.. no,” His vocal cords cracked. Begging, pleading. “No. You’re my strongest soldier, You’re resilient! And patient and determined and don’t crack under pressure-“ my head did. “-and you’re stubborn.”

He was running out of breath. Just like they were.

“Well congratulations Cap-,”

A beat. “John.”

His stomach fucking sunk.

“You managed to quell my obstinance,”

Birdy gasped a breath. It felt like they were dying. Drowning themselves for the fucking thrill of it.

“Made my mulishness look stupid. Want a gold fucking star? I would give you a scratch and sniff sticker but I usually only give those out to people I like.”

I like you, you’re the one person I can always stand. You’re the closest thing I have to a father, the only person who cared, you’re my person.

“You hate me, don’t you?”

Look me in the eyes as you say it. Let me know there’s nothing I can do.

Birdys eyes closed, they couldn’t do it.

“Yes.”

—

lol!!!!! so funny haha!!!! funny hahah with sad!!!! hahaha (sobsobsob) !!!!!!

i’m having too much fun

\o/

OH MY GOOOOOOOD THIS WAS FUCKING AMAZING MY HEART HURT

He's right though, Birdy can't get anything signed unless it goes through him.

This is fucking nuts I love this I love the way you write and I love how you've captured the relationship price and Birdy have that we'll see more of further down the track.

Thank you so much for taking your time to write these pieces, they're honestly in a league of their own honest to God.

The last few lines broke my heart man

#the dark lord is heartbroken

[chasingfictions]

james is such a good actor i will cry like. throughout wrecked u just Feel the subtle inflections of more openness and comfort when spike talks to buffy like, u really do believe n buy how much spike feels things have changed. even in just this simple moment:

there's such a comfort and casualness in the maybe. there's this quality on the we. literally they are a we. there's like, the slight performativeness and butterflies-in-the-stomach tentativeness of early s6 spuffy softness when they are sort of playacting the part of a couple -- on their date in life serial especially, spike's whole 'i need a moment with my lady' -- telegraphing the concept of their closeness for the demons who legit don't care, the real audience is himself, but he is playing for a projected external audience to grant the feelings of closeness a legitimacy. compared with this moment, just the two of them, the shared history and space of 'we've been through this' . they're a we, and spike has this comfort to his body language, his tone of voice. literally @willowrosenboob you've brain poisoned me im thinking abt everything in terms of performance and authenticity. spike entering into an authentic kind of performance in his self presentation -- the tank top with the low collar, the necklace, he is putting himself on show, but it's a vulnerable show. rather than a performance for an audience, of either himself or distant others, it's a show designed to be participatory and intimate and singular, a show curated to connect with buffy specifically.

like, them fucking the house down as a paradigm shift. and as that relates to performance, it's like, the shift between them as some sort of supernova, some cosmic exploding event, where due to the way light travels like, the way we are observing it is Just about our observation, the light reaches us in this spectacular show but it's no longer about what occured in the star itself. -> something more like pluto and charon, essentially two little planets just locked in a twosome orbit, they are facing each other, their movements are calibrated for each other, it is for no one else. im gonna be SICK.

bc ALSO like. buffy keeps up the performance, and in so doing brings spike back into the state of performance. buffy in episodes like older and far away and normal again, when she is interacting with spike in front of her friends, putting up this weird uncomfortable facade of disinterest, that everything is the same as it was. spike and buffy having moments of authenticity and singular connection -- dead things carpet scene -- moments which allow this stunning flood of authenticity and vulnerability, in a distinctly camp sensibility ('what is this, this thing we have?' 'we don't have a thing, we have this' / 'do you even like me?' 'sometimes) -- and which are ALSO tied to moments of Extreme playing on performativity, the tension between being Themselves and being On Show -- dead things balcony scene for example, which is playing distinctively on them observing others, being blatantly on show and yet still hidden. or like, their staunch commitment to public sex this whole season. the way we see them fucking in spike's crypt so few times compared to how often they are fucking or kissing inside the bronze, directly outside the bronze, on buffy's front lawn, in an abandoned building, in the alleyway outside the doublemeat palace. they are constantly skirting the boundary between public and private!!!!!! it's insane!!! they're insane!!!!! literally s6 spuffy tension of being Perceived and Put On Show of all time .... gonna be SICK .... god you guys.... you guys. .. i have so much more of s6 and all of s7 and they r going on a JOURNEY. GOD

#he may have gotten kicked out of julliard but he will never be kicked ot of my heart #btvs rewatch #btvs meta #NOT proofreading this!!!!!!!!

[shankschewtoy]

Hi!

I don't even know how to ask, actually i never made it, so... hi! I'm not from USA so my english is pretty bad, sorry!

The request is pretty personal. I've fighting against tuberculose since april/may this year, and i lose a lot of weight in a small time, what let me with a skinny appearence. Now, i've gain all the weight i lose, and i hope it's my last month of treatment (it's 6 to 12 months). But today, when i went to receive my medication, i saw that i lost 1kg, and that made so sad, like, all my effort to gain weight was like nothing.

Only if you wish to or accept to, i really wanted somenthing with Sanji and fem!reader or gn!reader that is passing trought the same thing at me.

Idk if that follows any rule that u have, but i would be glad. :D

Sanji my beloved 😭💞

a/n - hi hi!! Your English is great so don’t worry! I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been dealing with that, you’re so strong and really amazing for being able to push through!! I believe in you, and I’m gonna send you my best wishes 💜💜\(//∇//)\ Sanji would be there for you at your beck and call, and I just know it :) thank you so much, 🥺💜 keep going! You’ve got this!

Warnings ⚠️ - g/n reader, mentions of sickness, (I’m gonna make this one super happy :)

I love you no matter what <3

- Sanji isn’t a doctor, but he truly tries his very best for you!

- He knows you’re going through something extremely tough, and he feels helpless that he can’t do anything to take your pain for you

- Sanji doesn’t care what the fuck you look like, he only cares about how you feel. How you are doing

- He’ll try his best to help you with gaining weight back, he’ll make your favorite foods whenever you’d like, and he’ll encourage small steps, whatever you’re comfortable with!

- he’s there with you 100% :)

- even if you’re self conscious about your skinny appearance, he will remind you every single day that you’re absolutely perfect in his eyes

- He’ll tell you that so often that you can’t even think about your appearance anymore- 💜

- When you saw that you had lost 1kg again, he didn’t know what to say

- But he was there, holding you in his arms and trying to reassure you that not all hope was lost

- He’d rub your back, and let you talk whenever you needed to. Or if you just needed him to give you hugs, kisses, anything. You didn’t even need to ask him, he’s already doing it :D

- He felt so angry at your illness, why did it have to make you go through it? If given the chance, he’d gladly take your place if it meant you weren’t in pain

- listening to you tell him how your efforts to gain weight were all for nothing shattered his heart, the pieces stabbing his soul

- What was he even supposed to say to that? He didn’t know what to even think..

- He tried to tell you that your efforts weren’t all wasted, and that he’d help with whatever you needed

- (he’ll make you dessert 24/7 if that’s what you want hehe 🥺)

- Anything to make his love happy 💜

- He often stays awake at night and makes sure you’re alright before falling asleep, he always wants to see you fall asleep before he does

- It makes him feel a bit more at ease when you’re relaxed, your features peaceful

- He’ll be with you every step of the way, and he tries his best to encourage you and to support you! Hugs, kisses, sweet compliments, cuddles, and more.

- He hopes that this is your last month of treatment, (he wants to kick tuberculosis’ ass so bad-)

- the one thing he wants in life is for you to be happy

- Content with your life

- To see you smile gives him the life that he never thought he had before he met you

- And to see you happy? Makes his world brighter 💜

a/n - I hope this is what you asked for!! :) Sanji would be there for you 24/7 so don’t you worry! I seriously want to give you a hug so bad, but I won’t if it makes you uncomfortable 😭 thank you so much for requesting, and you got this! 💜💜

#one piece #one piece x reader #one piece hcs #sanji headcanons #sanji one piece #vinsmoke sanji #sanji x reader #sanji x y/n #sanji fluff

[dream-meister-translations]

WOLF GAME

THE WOLF GAME - PART 5

━

TAKEO KOJIMA : Alright everyone, please report your findings. 

RITSU KAMIKI : The basement was all locked up and the windows boarded. There's no way we can get inside. 

KOU NIIMURA : In the kitchen, we found some food and water in the refrigerator. It should sate us for now. 

MAKI TAKAYAMA : The second floor didn't seem to have many accessible areas. However, there was a single room filled with dangerous chemicals...And weapons. 

MAKI TAKAYAMA : It's as if they want us to use them to...

MIHO KAIDOU : ..........

SATORU YONEMORI : ............

An uncomfortable silence fell over us all. We knew what she was suggesting and it made us sick to our stomachs. 

MISAKI MORI : We couldn't find a way out in any of the rooms we searched on the third floor...However, there was a room that appeared to be some sort of classroom. 

MISAKI MORI : On the blackboard was written, "To the sheep : Have you yet to realize your true selves?"

KOU NIIMURA : Our "true selves"? What could that possibly mean?

RINTAROU IIDA : Maybe it's a hint to help us get out of here~♪

MISAKI MORI : There was something else we found too...Here, look at these papers. 

MIHO KAIDOU : Is this some sort of hospital record?

SATORU YONEMORI : What the!? Th-That's my patient record!

MAKI TAKAYAMA : Wait, what? Seriously? 

SATORU YONEMORI : Why on earth would my personal records be here...? Does this mean they were stolen from my hospital?

KOU NIIMURA : What the hell is going on...

MISAKI MORI : There's more strange things too. In the classroom, there was a vase on one of the desks. That same desk was all scratched up too. And there was a note. It looked like an invitation. 

MISAKI MORI : It said, "We are all very sad to say that Yuuya has passed away. Today we will be holding a memorial ceremony for Yuuya from all of us in his class."

KOU NIIMURA : Someone died? What does that have to do with anything?

MISAKI MORI : Does anyone know who Yuuya is?

SATORU YONEMORI : None of us are named Yuuya, right?

MIHO KAIDOU : If this is all one big prank, this is really fucked up.

RINTAROU IIDA : So many mysteries~

KOU NIIMURA : That aside, it seems we found no actual way to escape this building. 

CHIE KOMIYA : Wh-What do we do now? The wolf still might k-kill one of us.

TAKEO KOJIMA : For now, the most dangerous room is the one with all of the weapons in it. To prevent any of the weapons from being stolen by the wolf, I'll keep watch of it.

RITSU KAMIKI : You're gonna keep watch of it!? That's suuuper suspicious!!

TAKEO KOJIMA : No, it's not like that! I'm genuinely just concerned about everyone's safety! So um, if it's too suspicious for me to keep watch alone, how about you come with me? 

TAKUYA TSUCHIYA : Huh? Me? I guess that's fine...It is kind of a hassle, though...

MAKI TAKAYAMA : Thank you for keeping watch guys. I feel much more at ease. 

KOU NIIMURA : I'm going off on my own.

MISAKI MORI : Wh-What!? Isn't it better to stick together!?

KOU NIIMURA : I'd rather be alone than be around people I can't trust. I'll protect myself. I don't need anyone. 

RITSU KAMIKI : That's totally a death flag! You've got guts!

SATORU YONEMORI : I want to continue exploring a bit. 

MISAKI MORI : I guess I can't make you guys stick with us. It seems everyone wants to explore alone.

CHIE KOMIYA : A-Actually, I'd like to stay with you. I'm not a wolf, s-so we should be safe together.

MISAKI MORI : U-Um, well...Being alone just you and me would be kinda scary...

In the end, we all separated to spend time alone.

-

Several hours later...

I was on the third floor in one of the large rooms. A few others had gathered there too. As of yet, no murders have occurred. 

ME : (I hope it stays that way...)

Just when I thought that...

??? : AAAHHH!! OH MY GOD!!

A sudden scream echoed throughout the building. 

RITSU KAMIKI : Was that a scream!?

RINTAROU IIDA : Could it be the first wolf has made his move~?

In a panic, we all rushed out of the room in the direction of the scream. There, we saw Misaki crouched over in the doorway to the greenhouse. Her body was trembling and she was sobbing loudly.

MISAKI MORI : I-It's...*sob*

As we got closer, we all could see it. There lay the lifeless body of the lawyer, Miho. She had been brutally murdered. 

MAKI TAKAYAMA : The-The wolf must have killed her, right?

TAKUYA TSUCHIYA : Would seem so...

KOU NIIMURA : And so the game begins.

MERRY : Well, would ya look at that~? Seems like a sheep has been killed earlier than expected!

#Wolf Game #Wolf Game Another #Wolf Game translation #Wolf Game another translation #狼ゲーム #狼ゲームtranslation #Zetsubou Prison #絶望プリズン #Zetsubou Prison translation #絶望プリズン translation #Wolfpart5

[moonfurthetemmie]

i have several questions

does Pluto still loves Halloween like in ds??

does Hunter ever met Sparrow?? ( also, who net the creepypasta squad ( idk how they r called in here ) aside Sparrow ( well he only met Hacker(?) ( I also forgot abt his name in h!ds ))

is someone masochist of the cast?? ( weird question but i just feel like there is at least one person or its all gonna be a headcanon ( tats also includes do u allow headcanons on the h!ds??))

Was Dani ( I think tat was their name or it was just a meme ) was in a hospital?? ( I mean probably which just includes 2 more questions: Does Dani like was abt to commit it? ( aka yk ) Did Delusion like have a some kind of close relationship ( aka in love ) w Dani?? Also did Delusion took Dani to the JR Hospital like in DS ( aka if that whole thing happened )

well if wheeze and I have a headcanon for the H!DS fools it’s basically canon so

1. Pluto LOVES Halloween. Unfortunately for everyone else that’s his favorite time of year to do lots of murder. And ofc Slash and Byte always go with him. People are out and about, there’s lots of sick decorations to see, AND they get to dress up lots!! Very easy to hide their identities.

2. Hunter probably has met Sparrow; he hangs out in JR enough that he’s probably been there when Sparrow comes to get an assignment or report on one or whatever. Or he’s wandered around and run into Sparrow a few times. Either way, yeah; they’ve met.

3. So far, no one else of importance has met the Creepypasta Squad (they’re called the same thing here, though I would like to give them a new name,,,). Also H!DS Hacker’s nickname is Spindle! spindle my beloved

Sparrow also hasn’t met Fester/Bobby; only Spindle and Pulaski/Randy.

4. That’s…a good question? I don’t think so. Fester, maybe?? In a ‘wooHOOHoohoho pain is HILARIOUS’ kind of way? No one else is, though. Gouge, Slash, Byte, and Pluto are just sadistic, Delusion is just delusional. Hunter I don’t think handles pain well at all. Pulaski and Spindle probably have relatively high pain tolerances due to their unfortunate time stuck with Fester (And Spindle’s is probably even higher thanks to the demon thing). Sparrow’s probably about average about it. So. Yeah. If anyone is a masochist, it’s probably Fester.

And headcanon everyone if you wanna. If there’s something we’re really uncomfortable with we’ll say something, but it’s not like we could police your thoughts and headcanons even if we wanted to

5. Honestly, mostly due to how little attention we spare for Ani even in normal DS, H!DS Ani is very neglected. They exist, and hypothetically their story is similar to normal Ani, but since we forget normal Ani a lot anyways I’m not sure we’ll ever like, fully flesh out their backstory

#wheeze ​feel free to chime in if I’m missing something or forgot something #I think we might’ve talked about Fester being a masochist before but that might’ve been someone else #horror!ds #h!ds questions #h!ds slash #h!ds pluto #h!ds byte #h!ds delusion #h!ds hunter #h!ds gouge #h!ds Sparrow #h!DS Spindle #h!DS Pulaski #h!ds Feeter #ani deserves better but unfortunately we’re too busy simping for deranged murderers

[villanelledeservedbetter]

random radfem music rant bc i realised last night i still hold womens music to.higher standards than men's music and feel uncomfortable listening to music by women that express different opinions/perspectives than mine but ill still sing along to an angry xxxtentacion or mgk or lil peep song and I'll sing along to trash lyrics by men and I'll sing along to misogynistic shit if it goes hard and yet??? im embarrassed to say I like some libfem music or even just regular ass music that has the same themes as male music. I'm so much more excited to listen to music - i havent really gotten into new music since 2020 but finding new musicians who are women has helped me so much with that girly despair thing us femcels experience (i got called a femcel for commenting on a song by Banshee called YES ALL MEN so im doing my job right)

as part of my feminism I have sworn off getting into new male artists bc radical feminism really opened my eyes to the fact men only sing/scream about being rejected or getting b*tches or fucking or being sad or hating their moms

I realised I've been holding women to a higher standard bc i saw 2 liberal feminist bands yesterday and I felt uncomfortable when they mentioned anything I disagreed with

then i realised male artists get held to such a basic standard that it doesn't matter I don't agree w a fucking lyric that says 'shake ur ass for nobody else but u' because female artists have so much depth and pain to their songs and get held to such a higher standard and it must be terrifying writing and performing controversial lyrics

so ya trap bunny bubbles is unproblematic idc men rap about women like that all the time I love trap music made by women and metal made by women and rap and pop punk and all of that shit

note to self: if ur still gonna sing along to ur favourite emo music made by groomers then stop fucking holding female artists to a higher standard maybe their music can just be fun and a gig with a predominantly female and esp lesbian audience is the perfect place to shake that ass for nobody but ur damn self it's FUN let loose you're being given permission to have fun dancing and feel safe from men sexualising it

in particular bimbocore even tho i hate bimbo core as an aesthetic and form of feminism scene queen talks about some real issues and i dont care if she is a libfem at least I get to have fun but also scream about womens issues like reproductive healthcare and being sexually harrassed and being patronised and ok she made a song that combines country music with heavy metal with a feminist twist while wearing pink in a room I felt way safer in than most other gigs

and women have to work so much harder in music that more often than not their stage presence absolute destroys the lacklustre stage presences of men

I thought I hated gigs but i actually just get bored by men's music. also men's music is for everyone but womens music is usually a guilty pleasure for men. yes I will take the liberal feminist shit i will take the lesbian trap music I will take the trap music that talks shit about other women because I rap my ass off to kendrick lamar and mgk for example so idc if women express internalised misogyny or even if they're trash people, at least they don't write about enslaving other women. idc if their music is average it's still better than men's average music and at least they don't define women as someone's b*tch.

also the song 'everywhere' by shxggs goes hard as fuck but the lyrics make me feel sick

but I've decided I'm going to start holding men's music to the standard I hold womens music to and then I'll do a lil swap where I hold womens music to the same standard as mens ;)

[jtkys]

Hello, it's me again (if you can remember who I am) But I've had a bit of a weird day and I've been debating with myself wether or not to to and talk about it.

I've decided I am, but not very much. Since I'm still kind of scared that you're not in the mood to listen to me rant.

Warning here, the next few pieces of text will contain:

TW: sa mentions

If you are uncomfortable or triggered by this, please scroll away and do not read!

-----

I feel sick. I saw him today. And it was horrible. Just looking him in the eye was horrible.

I was picking my sibling up from school, and I saw him.

I was petting a cat and when I stood up, he was staring at me. In the eye, trying to work out who I am.

I had changed since it happened, different haircut, had a little bit of makeup on, taller, ect ect. So the possibility of him not remembering who I am is high.

But the face he had on while trying to find out who I was, the 2 second eye contact it scared me. Like, really scared me.

I panicked and ran down to my siblings school as fast as I could.

Scared he'd try something

I started remembering all the shit he did to me, and it kind of messed me up for the rest of the day.

I said goodnight to my best friend, but I still can't sleep

Sometimes I feel as though I'm not as valid as other people because he was younger than me.

I wish it never happened

:(

--------

By the way, if you're confused on who I am, I'm the same anon that asked if they could talk to you here :)

first off, it’s perfectly okay to vent to me whenever. Never feel scared to, ever. This is a perfectly safe space and I’ll never judge you, no matter what you say.

Secondly, I’m so sorry you had to go through that at first, and then see that person again. Its a horrible feeling and nobody deserves that, you didn’t deserve that at all. It’s a completely understandable reaction to be scared, especially to someone who’s done those kind of things to you. I get it, and you shouldn’t feel ashamed of being scared. I’m proud of you for managing to get through it and even just coming here to talk to me about it, that takes a lot of bravery to do, and it especially takes a lot of courage to open up about sa. I get the fear, I get how hard it is to deal with.

If it makes you feel better to think of it rationally, you should remember that it’s a school place. Staff, teachers, etc, should be around and would be able to see if anything was going to happen to you. Although I understand if that doesn’t help, because a lot of the time, fear stops you think rationally. Especially when it’s fear that you’re in danger- All that you have to remember now, though, is that person can’t hurt you anymore and you’re safe.

Everything you’re feeling and going through mentally and emotionally because of what the person did to you is valid. It doesn’t matter if they were younger, older, if any of your experience didn’t feel “valid enough”, your experience is valid and you deserve to be heard and comfortable. Everyone’s experience with sa is different, and that’s okay.

Again, I’m sorry that happened to you at all in the first place, and I wish I could help you more. I want you to remember that you’re loved and that people will be here for you and will listen to you when you need it. I’m always gonna be here if you need to rant or need comfort and that’ll never change.

Take care of yourself and try and get some sleep, ok? Do whatever makes you feel best, I’ll be here if you need me. Love u <33 /p (only saying that cause Ik ur secret identity, but that’s ok 💕)

#tw sa mention #tw sa #ranting

[videostak]

so sick of having my entire life being dictated by having to accommodate for other ppl who then go to shit on my life even more. like having to watch the doors anytime my dad is in the house having my mom keep every1 up thru out the night and acting oblivious to how someones sleep schedule is affected by the sounds of food being made in a microwave at 12 am or hearing 2hour long drunken phone calls from her room to the hallway to the bathroom to the kitchen etc and having in general let ppl know beforehand what i have planned for a day just so they can reveal that they were never even listening to what i told them or just straight up did not care and do their own random impuse thing that i then have to build my schedule around . like fuuuuuck you. only word on the tip of my tongue atm. genuinely no reason to try to be cooperative or understanding if they dont even ATTEMPT to do the same. i mean atleast i get to sleep in but thats only after they come back at like 1 or 2am. and forget abt me my sister literally works at 10 2mrw and has to get up early to get ready and my mom just shat on that despite my sister telling her immediately she brought up the idea of going somewhere for drinks. i feel so sorry for my cousin who like tries her hardest to be nice or like a inbetween ground just to have my mom creepily vent to her and overall make her feel extremely uncomfortable telling her rly in depth stories and secrets abt ppl who told my mom personal stuff in confidence not thinking my mom would immediately tell absolutely any1 the moment she felt the need to have a conversation. am p sure shes drunk rn cause she sounded very drunk and is just being v loud rn so like im sure she got drunk and then wanted to go to a bar to drink more and not have to worry abt getting caught. :| i mean idk if shell take my sister to work tomorrow but if she is too fucked up too then i guess ill just have to take her. but rly just insanely annoying shit. she refuses to go to therapy or somewhere where u address being dependent on alcohol so i think the only real tangible solution atm is to just give my all to cleaning out her room and then just monitor her like a hospital patient constantly. for the foreseeable future. its hard cause she spends all her time in her room and gets mad when i try to clean it and then my dad gets mad at me when i dont clean it and then when i do clean it my dad gets mad that we dont have any space for half the shit in her room or if we do idk where it goes cause im not even a very good cleaner its just 99% of the stuff falls on me cause no one else does it consistently. so like i just go back and forth at them both giving me shit so fuck everything huh. not in an awful bleak mood but regardless things on both fronts are v bleak. guess im not in an awful mood cause worst case scenario tomorrow i drive my sister to work which gives me more chance to drive and im rly rly looking forward to practicing in my actual manual car... cause its so pretty. so like im not at the end of my rope quite yet and dont think things will get super bleak. worst thing is me losing my job but dont think thats gonna happen quite about yet. and if it does ill atleast have the ability to drive places. so i cant say i didnt grow in some way

[ayotamacheck]

I loved your last spooky hcs! Could you please do some for Surya, Pablo, Yuri & Luke?

yes i can!! oo halloween spirit, im loving it 😎 ty for the ask, and happy (late) halloween (again)!!!

part 1 :)

Surya

yes he's a big cool marine biologist, no he can't handle getting a shot without hyperventilating. it's ok surya, i get u. it just feels so unnatural to have that like, injected in you. yuck. he used to be really bad about it when he was a kid. definitely screamed while getting shots when he was really young, but he's grown out of that embarrassing stuff. now he just needs something to hold on to and some patience while he keeps himself from having a panic attack lol.

needles

minor hc, but if you're close/dating and he needs to get one for something it definitely helps to hold your hand, even though he'll probably squeeze tight enough to break it lmao

Pablo

he seems like he would be very squeamish about anything blood/injury related. burns are tolerable since he and his brother are both exposed to them pretty often and they take enough protective measures for it not to be super common, but damn, you come to him with an open cut and he's probably going to faint lmao. at the very least he'll be sick. he just can't handle seeing people bleed, it freaks him way out

blood

he physically cannot handle getting blood drawn without passing out.

growing up he was like the worst when raf got hurt, because pablo would be the one encouraging them to do risky things like finding the steepest hill tp ride their bikes down, but the second raf fell and scraped up his arm or something pablo was. out.

i love him but he is a wimp about it

Yuri

i don't know why. i feel like she would either rlly like snakes or absolutely hate them so im gonna go with the latter. they're just so weird. maybe one bit her when she was younger and she just hung onto that fear subconsciously or maybe she just finds their little no-leggedness freaky, but she doesn't like them regardless. she sees them frequently enough, and she won't like kill them or anything, they just make her very uncomfortable

snakes

i also hc scott as a massive snake guy. like he definitely owns a snake. and whenever yuri stops by charles's house scott always tries to get her to hold it. it's torture and she is definitely going to clock him one day

Luke

again this one is based off of vibes alone because i couldn't decide between a fun fear and a deep one so i just tacked the second onto the bottom lol

clowns

luke is definitely scared of clowns. like come on look at this guy, of course he's scared of clowns. and for good reason! his parents invited one for his tenth birthday and it still haunts him to this day. something about them just makes him so incredibly uncomfortable. nina definitely teases him about it, but ben gets it; clowns are just so unnatural. yes this is a clown slander page im sorry

other fear i had in mind for him is being afraid of stagnation, like staying in the same place forever and never venturing out from what his parents want him to do. it's a subconscious fear. that's why he's so adamant about his own business, because the last thing he wants is to be stuck running his family's vineyard forever. man just wants to grow away from what he's expected to do!!

#x pablo <3 #x yuri <3 #x luke <3 #x surya <3 #x my writing #coral island headcanons #coral island imagines #writing requests #asks #coral island writing #anon #coral island

[takasuya]

whatever if anyone sees this whatever the fuck lmao im going insane the fact that he said we can talk later and then said their peace and then said theyre not replying only after i asked like. was i not important to you. the same with my other fucking friends. like okay. i know i was a lot and shit but goddamn lmao. i thought how people get close was to rely on each other and i wanted u to rely on me too. i was so alone and isolated and nobody not even my irls would reach out first it used to be me starting convos before and then after that ppl didnt really talk to me till i did and it sucks cus how the fuck was i supposed to feel wanted and loved like that. now i dont have energy for anything and starting over is tiring and it sucks and all i wanted was for ppl to put effort into reaching out to me too. when i talked to my fucking poly mates they woildnt even follow up. and when i talked to my onlines im always. begging for aome kind of response. like sorry i made u uncomfortable, i was isolated and needed people. sorry for that and also im so fucking angry at everything its nobodys fault but i cant help but wish i wasnt so sick to act like that. its not like anybodys gonna care bcus they tell me to move on like its so easy like u werent important to me. blocking is the only way i can try and forget. but i cant and im not even mean much to u bcus fuck dude. and my irls reply to me with lmao and lol and yell at me when i was in a crisis and i made their day harder. my “friends” who got mad at me for being upset w my sister and even if they are they still projected it onto me while i was breaking down and losing it it fucking sucks. and its heartbreaking to knowni matter so little to people. anyway im gg away. didnt even say anything to me on my fucking birthday.

and ppl tell me to stop victimising myself but the ppl ard all kinda do that and when i say anything they just. god. i fucking hate it here. i want to end it all so bad but i cant bcus im so fucking angry im going to fucking explode thats all. fuck this shit lmao

#vent #whatever if ppl i know see this idc man just block or whatever or dont look at my shit