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#it's kurt for anyone who doesn't know
trashcanalienist · 2 years
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#i lay in bed for hours cradling my bear the one thing that gives me comfort and i think of ends endlessly#i could try to reach out more but i don't want to worry anyone and i'm so tired#what keeps me here? intertia? my family? my friends? my little beast? my boyfriend?#do i deserve those things? if i do do they deserve to lose me? life is only suffering for me but other people seem to be having a grand old#time. having endured so much pain i do not want to ever inflict it on others. but i want to stop hurting. life is a series of decisions and#consequences and then one way or another it's over#radius. you would understand this complicated dilemma of mine. if your robots did not require your sacrifice - if there was no purpose to#your end nor as there never is any purpose to your life...#dear primus sweet helena what of you? if all beauty and curiosity in the world was unattainable and forever beaten out of your desperate#loving fingers#dearest henry if the secrets of the universe were universally denied to you...#i can only ask from you who want to live. because all those who wanted otherwise got exactly that and it seems they would be#and must have been fine with that.#oh chester. ian and dеad and layne and kurt...and i don't want to think about things not known for sure but. god. i am terrified to think#of -- of anything concerning that. he was alone. they all were whether through purposeful isolation or just a few hours and it really#doesn't take all that long. i know this well. i can still taste it. when you dedicate yourself to it suddenly it runs hotter than ever#before. it's...indescribable. life or agony? maybe both. red.#ah what was i saying...#oh yes the middle ground i walk#for that -- is where i sleep. i cannot help but think and think constantly. i fever and rush and howl and cry and feel so much#erik? if you had known that redemption could only come by your own hand but would never make you accepted?#if you knew that that which you have been so denied and that which no human could live without...#hated you so and would never accept you for the beast can never be loved by society even if he stays his place#and you glorious phantom would never be so self-effacing even as you loathe what you are. my friend.#and winslow. what you have been through.#words i speak#phantom musings#nonsense
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aromantic-diaries · 25 days
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Yknow I feel more represented by characters who aren't confirmed to be aro/ace or even written as such, but can still be interpreted that way because of how they're characterized, rather than characters who are confirmed to be aro/ace through word of god while the actual story has no implications of that character being aro/ace beyond them not having a love interest. The latter kind of waters it down to not wanting to date or have sex which isn't really all there is to it. I get that not all representation has to be a 100% accurate, deep and touching depiction of the aro/ace experience, but that doesn't mean completely ignoring the character's identity beyond not giving them a love interest.
I will elaborate with two examples under the cut
So for the word of god representation, let's take Lilith Clawthorne from the owl house as an example. I think she's a great character, I liked her, and I think the owl house is a fantastic show that deserved better. However I don't think of Lilith as good representation because the only real confirmation we have is outside of the actual show. It's not in the canon material, she doesn't have a love interest but she's not even the only character who stays single so that doesn't mean much. She isn't shown to be any different from anyone, her being aroace isn't really relevant in any way. I'd say the best word for describing this type of representation is Passive. We know she's aroace because it was confirmed outside of the show, she doesn't have a love interest, but it doesn't really go beyond that. I get that the show was cut short and maybe it would have been elaborated on more but that's just a generous assumption on my part. My point is, I don't really see any real aro or ace experiences reflected in her character, neither mine or anyone else's. She doesn't really represent any actual aspec experiences at all which is why I don't consider her to be good representation. I still understand the community's attachment to her though, we take what we can get and what we get is very little. So while I love the owl house, the aroace representation is pretty dissapointing compared to the great representation of other queer identities and I'm kinda bummed that the aroace character still gets sidelined in an otherwise very queer friendly show
For another example I'll bring up my all time favorite, Rudy Waltz, protagonist of the book Deadeye Dick by Kurt Vonnegut. Deadeye Dick is not a feel good story. The story is dark, bitter and the conclusion is no different. Still, I would describe it as oddly comforting and pretty funny at times. So what does that have to do with anything? Well, our Rudy can very well be interpreted as asexual and probably aromantic as well. He isn't referred to as such, he describes himself as a neuter, the author states in the preface that the protagonist's disinterest is a metaphor for his own declining sexuality, and the book was written before the term aromantic was even coined. However, as an aromantic asexual reading the book, I could not help but deeply relate to Rudy's lack of interest in ever having sex or finding a romantic partner. I felt kinship with him as he described knowing how many people there are who are just like him and yet they go unnoticed by most people, because I was one of those people. I related to him and the way his disinterest in sex was met with such confusion from another character. Despite not being described as such, Deadeye Dick is very much in part an asexual and an aromantic story because the protagonist's experiences line up with that of someone on those spectrums. You could argue that calling him aroace is problematic due to him fitting a negative stereotype due to his emotional detachment, or that he only fits the label because of said detachment, but that does not change the fact that he is still better representation than a character who was confirmed outside of the story with no real implications. I see myself in Rudy more than I do in Lilith because Rudy actually feels like an aroace character
Anyways, rant over. Feel free to disagree with me
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otdiaftg · 20 days
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The King's Men - Chapter Fourteen
Day: Saturday, March 9th / 10th* Time: 3:42 PM EST
Andrew's expression is deceptively calm, but there is iron in his grip when he seizes Nathaniel's chin. Nathaniel lets him look his fill because it gives him time to study the bruises lining Andrew's face. The worst of the lot is a dark, narrow streak running down over his cheekbone from the corner of his right eye. The force of impact left half of Andrew's eye red with blood. An elbow, Nathaniel thinks, that had come way too close. "They could have blinded you," Nathaniel says. "All that time fighting and you never learned how to duck?" A stony stare is his only answer. Andrew lets go of him so he can tug Nathaniel's hood out of the way. He drags a finger along the lines of tape keeping the myriad of bandages in place as if looking for the best place to start. He tears the gauze off Nathaniel's right cheek first, exposing the stripe lines left by Lola's knife. He favors the stitches with a cursory glance before moving on. The tape on Nathaniel's other cheek hurts like hell coming off, since it pulls the skin around his burns, and Andrew freezes with his hand a few scant inches from Nathaniel's face. Andrew's expression doesn't change, but there is a new tension in his shoulders that doesn't bode well for anyone in the room. Andrew had dropped the first bandages as useless, but these ones he slowly sets on the floor by his knee without taking his stare off Nathaniel's face. Since Nathaniel is kneeling with his back to the room, Wymack is the only other person who can see the mess Lola made of his face. Nathaniel doesn't dare look up at him, but Wymack's fierce, "Christ, Neil," says the burns look as bad as they feel. A bed creaks as one of the Foxes get up. Wymack jerks his free hand in an emphatic order to stay put and says, "Don't." "One at a time," Browning reminds them. Andrew presses two fingers to the underside of Nathaniel's chin to turn his head. Nathaniel lets himself be guided and says nothing while Andrew looks his fill. When Andrew drops his hand and clenches it in Nathaniel's hoodie, Nathaniel risks looking back at him. There is violence in Andrew's eyes, but at least he hasn't shoved Nathaniel away yet. That has to count for something. "I'm sorry," Nathaniel says. Andrew's fist goes back, but he doesn't take the swing. Nathaniel knows it isn't because that is the hand cuffed to Wymack; Andrew's arm actually shakes with the effort it takes to not knock Nathaniel's head off his neck. Nathaniel says nothing to tip the balance either way. At length Andrew uncurls his fingers and lets his hand hang limp from the cuff. "Say it again and I will kill you," he says. "This is the last time I'm going to say it to you," Kurt says, coming up beside Wymack with a dark look on his face. "If you can't stow that attitude and behave—" Nathaniel shoots a warning look at him and cuts in with, "You'll what, asshole?" "The same goes for you, Nathaniel," Browning says. "That's your second strike. A third misstep and this," he twirls his finger to indicate the Foxes, "is over. Remember you are only here because we are allowing it."
Art used with permission by Lunapiq. Thank you @lunapiq!
*Due to the Leap Year, I have opted to highlight the day rather than the date to keep the events in occurrence to the 2007 year. I will continue to mark both days accordingly.
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cantdothis-nomore · 1 year
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How Logan, Scott, Jean, Rogue, Kurt react to a reader who likes to give them surprise hugs on a daily basis.
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Logan
He'd probably always be up on guard so wouldn't really like it the first few times you did it but after a little while he came to love having you sneak up behind him and hug him
Especially if you jumped up onto his back and gave him a hug ♡
He kind of start relying on your daily 'surprise attacks' on him and after a really hard day he'd really appreciate the affection
He'd never act out or get angry st you for it he'd just find it really nice and really funny
Others would ask him if he found it annoying to which he replied he didn't
Logan wouldn't understand how people could get annoyed at their s/o's showing them affection and in the most adorable way aswell <333
But yeh he'd find it so cute and so funny and wouldn't mind it at all
Scott
Like logan, he wouldn't really like it at first but would warm up to it
After a little while when he feels your arms snaking around him he'd turn around and catch you in an embrace instead and suprise you
People wouldn't say anything about it because they knew they would get shut down immediately by their leader but in the cases of the people that do he'd remind them their place nicely in a calm tone that could terrify anyone within seconds
He loves your surprise hugs and doesn't want to let anyone ruin your special little moments together
I mean like you'd probably get some jealousy stares but you'd both ignore them and carry on with your little moments every day
Jean
She'd love it
That's literally it, she'd love it
She'd appreciate the affection and love how happy you looked after surprising her
She'd look forward to your hugs every day even though they did come randomly but without a doubt they were there every day
Her love for you grew with these little surprise hugs more and more each day
She loves you and makes sure yoy know it aswell
Rogue
Would be really surprised and wouldn't really know how to react or deal with it
She would really appreciate the affection because it helps her see that she isn't alone almost
She'd be unsure by the hugs at first because she didn't feel like she deserved them but after time she really started to love them and even smiled when you did it
You made her feel special and she loved that almost as much as she loves you ♡
Her love for you and her confidence grows everyday from you basically taking away her fears and insecuritys and putting a feeling of safety in its place
She adores yoy more than anything in the world and wouldn't hesitate to drop anything to receive one of your surprise hugs
Kurt
Would be surprised because he's supposed to be the prankster and be surprising people not the other way round
He'd burst out laughing every time you did it out of happiness at the affection you were showing him
After a little while he'd hear you coming up behind him and he'd turn around and scoop you up and give you a hug instead
He loves being shown affection especially from you
Honestly would say he couldn't live without it lol
Sorry this is so short but I hope you like it ♡
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pastelclovds · 1 year
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SLASHERS RANKED FROM LOUDEST TO QUIETEST IN BED !
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⟡₊˚ ୭ slashers in order of rank ! billy lenz, stu macher, brahms heelshire, bubba sawyer, kurt kunkle, billy loomis, herbert west, jason vorhees, vincent sinclair, thomas hewitt, bo sinclair, micheal myers. ⟡₊˚ ୭ content warnings ! amab reader (no pronouns tho), top dom reader, sub bottom slashers, anal sex, possesive & obsessive behavior (billy lenz), brat taming (stu & billy loomis). ⟡₊˚ ୭ word count ! 1,315 words ⟡₊˚ ୭ authors note ! happy (late) valentines day! ;D
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LOUDEST. ↴
♡ BILLY LENZ -> because of his mental illness, billy is very loud and expressive. from down right dirty rambles to him shouting about the various ways to end someone. billy is unpredictable, not knowing when his next outburst with come up. but one thing that is predictable about him is his volume when he's fucking with you. this man is so loud that you need to literally gag him so that he could shut up and not annoy your neighbors (he's into it tho). billy will giggle almost insanely while also letting out deep moans when riding you. when your pounding into the spot that will make him see stars, he will make it known to your neighbors of your private time together by screaming out your name and laughing like a madman. he always rambles about how good your dick is, how you are his and only his, how he would kill anyone who touches you, and all kinds of dirty talk. and knowing him, it's probably not far from the truth.
♡ STU MACHER -> this is no surprise at all. stu is known for his extroverted (and slightly annoying) personality. it's one of the reasons why he became popular after all, so you can imagine how loud he is in bed. when stu is feeling bratty, he will moan and beg so loudly even when you tell him to be quiet. but when you put him in his place, his whimpers are the cutest. while stu can be a little shit, he can hold his noises back a bit when he genuinely doesn't want to make you disappointed in him. although it doesn't last long. in his mind, when he gets loud, he is expressing how good you make him feel (which is every time you have sex). overall he is loud but he can keep himself quiet if he really tries (and ends up failing).
♡ BRAHMS HEELSHIRE -> its impossible for this baby to control his noises. he tries so hard, he really does. but the way your dick rubs against his walls makes him moan out to the sky above. brahms always wants to be a good boy for you, the way he moans out your name and whines when your cock hits his prostate makes you glad that the mansion you two live in is miles away from anyone being able to hear you two fuck like rabbits. when you tell him to not hold back his sounds, he will sing like a canary. but when you tell him to keep quiet, the poor man will try with all his might.
♡ BUBBA SAWYER -> since bubba is nonverbal he relies on his noises to tell people how he is feeling. that's no different when he's having sex with you. he loves the feeling of your dick abusing his hole and using him for all he's worth, his adorable soft squeals sound like a piglet. he's a big whiner and squealer. and as much as he likes to show you how good you make him feel, he knows he can't be too loud because he doesn't want to hear their endless teasing in the morning. but when you two are alone, he goes wild. I'm talking, high pitched moans, squeals, whines, groans the whole batch. and when he feels too good, he might not want to end after three rounds.
NOISY. ↴
♡ KURT KUNKLE -> while kurt is not as loud as the four above him, he still has his moments when you need to silence his noises with your hand. he can keep his sounds in check if you two are fucking in his house when his parents are home, but if are being particularly rough with him that day, he can't stop even a few moans escaping. honestly, with how pretty he and his sounds are, he might as well start an onlyfans. and you wouldn't mind showing to the world how good you make your baby.
♡ BILLY LOOMIS -> this brat just loooves to piss you off. he knows how much you love to hear him moan like a cheap slut, so he purposefully bits his lips or use him hands to mute himself. he wants you to put him in his place under you, but afterwards you treat him like a princess. he is certainly not as loud as his bestfriend. but if you want him to let his beautiful noises, you have to work for it. and the reward is worth it to see his fucked out face grow dumb on your cock as you two make sure your neighbors don't can't.
♡ HERBERT WEST -> herbert is always so busy with his work, so as soon as he's done, he wants to be with you. although he will never admit it, he craves you and always wants your attention. that being said, herbert isn't really the loudest. he does moan loudly ever now and then when you make him feel really good. but he sometimes holds his sounds back because he is embarrassed at how loud he can be. but once you and him get closer, he will become a bit more vocal.
QUIET. ↴
♡ JASON VORHEES -> jason is a good boy for you and only you, he becomes flustered at the simplest of praises, and although he isn't the loudest, he is still cute. he makes adorable whines and soft moans when you thrust your dick against just the right spots. when you and him become closer, he would whisper in your ear almost silently about the pleasurable experience you're gifting him.
♡ VINCENT SINCLAIR -> vincent wants you to know how much pleasure you give him, he wants you to know how much he loves you, but he can't. it's not that he doesn't want to, it's because his vocal cords are messed up. so it's very difficult for him to speak. so you always listen closely whenever you two are getting down and dirty, and you treasure every whimper and quiet moan from him.
♡ THOMAS HEWITT -> thomas may be a cannibal murderer to others, but to you, he is a big teddy bear. even though he can't express his feelings through speech, he can express how he feels towards you with acts of service. and one of his favorite act of services is through sex, more specifically by riding you until he is breathing loudly and letting out deep groans of your name. he doesn't get any louder than the usual moan here and there. but he desperately wants you to know that he loves you, only you.
SILENT. ↴
♡ BO SINCLAIR -> bo is the type of guy to believes that him making any noise during sex would make him look weak and unmanly. even when you and him grow to love each other, and even when your cock is so deep inside him and pounding away every thought that comes to his mind, he won't let a single sound come out of his mouth. the man is stubborn and prideful, but if you make him go through a couple of rounds and cum more times than he can count, then he will let out a few moans, but nothing else. this bastard is strong.
♡ MICHEAL MYERS -> dead silent. sometimes when you're fucking him you worry if he's passed out (or dead) and stop to ask if he's okay, only for him to hit you on the arm and let out an unpleased grunt because you stopped. the only noises he lets out are his labored breaths, deep grunts, and rarely moans. he lets you know what to do by signing things like, 'so good' or 'faster'. he still enjoys your company and wants you to know, but in his own silent (and slightly creepy) way.
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all rights reserved © pastelclovds. all fanfics belong to me, please do not copy, translate, repost, nor recommend on tiktok the fics seen below as this is strictly prohibited. anyone found doing so will be contacted immediately.
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mintmatcha · 7 months
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the pursuit of silence (and all the noise along the way)
nanami kento x reader
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part two: fissures (and where they shouldn't be)
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CW: cisfem reader, Space AU (vaguely Star Wars. Vaguely), reader has a cybernetic limb. slow burn. Reader has an established nickname and is referred to using Miss and Mrs.
JJK AU MINORS DNI
masterlist
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The ship you’re ushered to is much nicer than anything you’re used to flying. It’s sleek and polished like a dream-- there’s even that stiff, earthy, chemical smell of newly processed leather. Haibara and Itadori must be absolutely buzzing with jealousy; you've never touched anything this advanced, let alone either of them. 
 It takes a second for you to marvel over the system before you take your seat. Luckily, manual controls for all flying vehicles are pretty much standardized, so you easily flip yourself into gear, then the star ship. The engine hums, a tape of music crackles to life and you almost feel normal.
But this isn't like any of your normal loads. You’re used to cargo that doesn't move or talk, piles of who knows what that sit in the back. Special passengers are usually reserved for pilots that have that shine in their eyes, that desirable something you just don't have.
When you were new, they had you fly a Jedi to some forest planet. He was a man with hair darker than the sky and earlobes stretch wide enough your finger could have slipped through. He had ducked himself into the back of the ship without a word, not even sparing you a parting glance when he departed hours later. It was like you weren't even human-
or, based in the whispers around him, too human. 
Back then, the disdain that surrounded him cut deep, but those wounds have long since healed and the scars are thick enough to guard your feelings. 
Nanami boards, walks directly to you and says. "Thank you, I'm ready whenever you are."
Like it’s nothing.
He stands there, a bound booklet in hand, waiting for you to respond. A delicate pen is tucked into the binding, nib red with ink. That pen has touched papers more important than anything you’ll ever do with your life.
Nothing proper comes to mind, so you just nod to the Senator, kurt and quick.
The only other seat in the cockpit is to your right. You think that he can’t possibly want to sit there, so close to you, but then he does, buckling himself in like he could ever possibly belong here, with you. The trim of his coat brushes against your leg. It’s a simple, innocent touch, but  your brain immediately betrays you. It goes blank mid pretest, sputtering over the fact Nanami Fucking Kento is less than four feet away from you. A bundle of papers is tucked under his arm, a delicate pen trapped into the binding, and your heart soars at the sight of it. 
There’s a crackle over the transmission giving you clearance for take off. That’s just enough to snap you back into place. Work, you remind yourself, this is just work. You mumble a confirmation into the receiver and force a couple of even breaths.
A couple of switches and calmly flashing lights are all it takes to embark. Thrusters off, traction down, engines on and clear-- before you know it, you’ve slipped  out of the hanger and into the gravity free drift of space. Then, with a couple more steps, the slipstream of hyperspace pulls you in. 
Despite Haibara and Itadori’s protests, flying truly isn’t difficult. It’s a groove you slide into, a space that your brain clicks into, a version of yourself that just activates when you need it. Flying makes sense, more than anything on the ground ever did. 
Most importantly, space is quiet. It’s eerie, how it almost crackles with nothing, a fog of sounds that pass by too quickly for anyone to ever make out. It’s peace, it’s joy, it’s everything you wish you could hold in your fingers-
Senator Nanami sighs to himself and you are immediately, violently uncomfortable with the lack of words coming from your mouth.
“I’m sorry for the lack of official transport, sir,” you say, before you can stop yourself.
“Don’t be.” Nanami doesn’t look up from the paper he’s reading. His glasses sit above the ridge of his nose, angled low. It reminds you of an old man, but in a charming way. The angles of his face are classic and sharp, familiar in ways you’ve seen before and long to see again, but his nose is off kilter, bumped slightly at the top from a break that happened years ago.
“Haibara speaks highly of your abilities, Mrs. Nine,” he continues, tapping his pen against the paper. He pauses slightly, then circles something in bright red. The delicate curve of his wrist, the way his thick fingers so carefully hold together: how the mighty have fallen-- you’re finding this erotic somehow. You need to get laid the second you get back on base.
You’re staring. You snap your attention back to the front.
“Mei Mei also had good things to say about you,” he continues, “So far, I am not disappointed.”
Your ability to get off the base impressed him. The Senator must have low standards.
“Thank you, Mr. Senator.” You manage to keep your voice even and professional. Despite how strange your chest feels. 
“Nanami is fine, Mrs. Nine.”
“Miss.” You shift in your seat and the leather creaks under you with an embarrassing sound,  “It’s, uh- Miss. There's no Mr. Nine or anything.  Nine’s not even my name- it's just a call sign.”
Your hand slips off of the control. Your whites have gone pale from the pressure of squeezing. 
“‘Cause like, I’m Pilot 333, and three plus three plus three is nine. So, they call me Nine. Sometimes Niney.” You’re talking, but your brain has left the building.  “It’s stupid. Haibara came up with it when we were newbies and it stuck. I don’t even think people know my real name, to be honest.”
He hums a sound and it immediately silences you, jaw audible snapping shut. "It suits you, Miss Nine."
Your cheeks might be on fire. This is everything you ever wanted, and yet your brain is betraying you. The Senator -- no, Nanami, he’s letting you refer to him casually-- is so far about your station, so much better than you by employment alone, and yet he’s looking your way, expression neutral and yet, almost, perhaps, soft-
"I really like jizz,” you blurt out. 
Nanami slowly looks up over his glasses, eyebrows raised so high that his forehead creases a million times over. He parts his lips and then closes them with a befuddled sound, then opens them again.
"Excuse me?"
"Jizz?" you gesture around the cockpit, "The music-- it's called jizz."
"Oh," he clears his throat twice, then a third time, "On my planet, that is a colloquial term for- never mind. The music is fine. Please, don’t say jizz."
The next seven parsecs are almost completely silent, covered only by the upbeat swagger of jizz.
Lighting yourself on fire might be a less painful experience. 
The next four hours are marked by only a few distractions. Hyperspace is filled with the silence you used to crave, but you can’t focus on that. Instead, you’re lost in how the pit smells like some sort of sultry, woody tone, almost like Spice but with an herbier finish. It’s just a drop in the air, something that you almost have to search for, and that gives it that luxurious edge that most men miss. Restraint, you think, it’s applied with restraint.
You want to ask what scent he’s wearing, but you can’t find the nerve to speak again. 
You’re going to have to ask Haibara what jizz means.
Judging by the Senator’s pink cheeks, it’s nothing good.
Does jizz smell good?
Nanami hasn’t written anything for the better part of two hours when you blink into the outer orbits of his planet. The fall out of the pocket is a bit abrupt, bad enough you both get caught by your seatbelts. Mei Mei will scold you about that when you return. Usually you’re so smooth with it-- you blame the fact this is a new ship.
From a distance, the planet is just a dark, blanketed ball, hanging around a singular red sun. It’s massive, easily three times the size of your own planet-- twice the size of Coursant! A moonless planet, forever alone in the sky, it orbits all on its own.  
Somehow, you’re disappointed. This isn’t the jewel you were promised. There’s no strings of lights or flashing megas cities like the other vacation planets you’ve seen. It’s just quiet, simple, and storming.
“We are arriving.” You stress the ‘are’ a bit to be playful, but it doesn’t sound natural. He hums an agreement and you dive down.
The atmosphere is thicker than you imagined, but it’s no issue. Clouds have their tells- bumps where pockets of pressure are waiting to tilt your ship, smooth bits where the air is much colder than the rest. You’ve known how to speak their language since you first sat in this seat, so you listen and descend. The Nav systems buzz and crackle with an irritating amount of static, so you manually flip them off.  They weren’t going to get used anyway.
The clouds give way and you emerge into the planet proper. 
“Oh, Maker.”
“What's wrong?" Nanami’s head shoots up, grabbing his seatbelt in preparation,"I told you the Navs wouldn’t work-"
“No,” you cut him off, “It's just beautiful.”
Rolling hills go on as far as the eye can see, crescendoing into mountain ranges and wooded peaks, powdered by drifting white flakes. Snow. You've never seen snow in person before. Even through the quilted sky, fragments of sunlight illuminate golden soil, painting the world with a spectacular depth. A long time ago, on Naboo, you had seen someone bathe their entire canvas with ochre, brushstrokes so thick  the cotton canvas’ texture was lost. Then, with a mastery you didn’t think possible from droids, let alone organics, he built the scenery on top, forming art with only a backlight of sunshine. That art, purchased with too many credits and carried home wet, was nothing compared to this.
The craft hovers as you drink it in. Night is approaching, touching the edges of what you can see.
“I thought it was going to be like Canto Bight.” You swivel to get a better look. There’s dots of lights, simple towns scattered across the landscape like glow worms on their strings, “But it’s not at all.”
“The bigger cities are starting to look that way, but we’ve been passing legislation to protect the natural aspects.” Nanami’s voice is warm. He’s moved to the edge of his seat, straining and watching as if he’d never seen any of this before. “Our main revenue is tourism and it’s done our world so much good, but it means nothing if we lose the core of what this planet is.”
Snow vibrates in the air, carried upwards by the draft your vessel has created. It’s like hyperspace with its swirls and streaks, a simple beauty you forgot could exist. In the distance, beyond the curve of  the world, a blue glow tinges the horizon. A city, cloaked in the night that rolls in. It’s nothing compared to what’s in front of you, you’re sure.
"It's nothing special."
“Are you kidding?" you breathe,  “It's a gem.”
“Thank you.” You can see him turn to you in your peripheral, lingering for a long while before speaking. “Can you believe this is considered our worst season?”
“How could it possibly get better?”
Nanami doesn’t turn away, silently studying your profile. You can make out how his eyes, just as pale and sapphiric as the frozen landscape, bounce back and forth, searching for something in your features.
He doesn’t turn away.
Why doesn’t he turn away?
Panic that you’re being weird sets in again. Was that childish? Did you embarrass yourself without even knowing? Suddenly, your clothes feel coarse and cheap against your skin and the air feels unbearably hot. As much as you try to escape it, the scent of it must cling to you- that Outer Rim nobody stench.  
Of course it's strange that you're marveling. Thousands of tourists visit every year and you can bet that none of them care about the landscape. 
Oh, Maker. Nanami Kento is the one behind the spike in tourism. Insulting the city like that must have come off as an insult about him.
You long for the rainy surface of home, where the only thing you could smell was the iron rich mud. 
“Where should I land?” You try to regain your composure. The rims of your eyes burn a bit as an unknown cacophony of emotions begins to rise up. 
The man lingers a second more before sliding back into his chair, neck rolled back to watch the ceiling.
“Sixty clicks behind us.” 
His voice isn’t sweet anymore. 
The burn grows stronger. You never let your hopes rise, and yet they fall further still, dug into the ground under the boot heel of disappointment. 
. . . . . . . . .
The landing pad is carved out of a stretch of mountains. The dusted blanket of snow is pushed aside into uneven piles as your craft settles down, only slipping slightly against the iced over stone. The engine hums with an uneven thrum, pulsing then sputtering in a way you expect from a motorbike, not an advanced transport vessel. An unsettled feeling sits in your stomach as you flick through the power down procedures, sliding off the traction and turning off the friction reducers, cutting off fuel and limiting battery. 
Errors aren't common. There might not even be one, but something sticks in your gut like glue, refusing to be digested. 
Nanami seems unaffected. It's easy to chalk the uneasy nature of the landing to pilot error. He ghosts a finger over the papers once again, pretending to proofread once again. You doubt there's anything left for him to even discover in that text.
 Everything on the dash is green, happily blinking in placid paces. If something were wrong, you'd be seeing orange lights, stroking, or--
“Oh, shit."
Or that. You shoot up to examine the gauges more closely. One strip of lights right above you is completely dark, the lights burnt out. One of the fuel meters is powered all of the way down, arrow pointing past empty.
 Spaceships don't consume fuel the way a gasoline based engine does, they run partially on hypermatter: fragments of planetary core, augmented and altered in ways engineers couldn’t even begin to explain to you. The resulting thick slurry produces energy with such a high frequency that a ship can then enter lightspeed in hyperspace. Most ships can run on a sliver of it for lightyears, but the power supply isn’t endless. Cores do still need to be replaced quite frequently, especially nicer vehicles like this one. 
According to this little meter, yours should have been replaced a long time ago. “Oh, shit.”
The Senator sits up, gripping the arms of his chair. When he realizes you’re on the ground, he relaxes, but only barely. 
“Nothing major, just-” God, he’s going to think you’re incompetent. How did you not notice this before? The Out Station is one of the few places in the Inner Rim to easily refuel-- there’s no way you left with a battery so low.   “Uh-”
You’re trying to think and talk at the same time, but failing at both. You had to have checked this before you left. You had to. You had to.
“It’s not a big deal, don’t worry about it.”
Apparently, you aren’t convincing. 
“I will be worrying about it, so please just tell me.”  Nanami closes his book with a clap.
“I think the hypermatter is almost depleted,” you admit, flicking the meter as if it’ll make the arrow move.  “Or there’s something wrong with the generator. I’m-- I’m not sure.”
“You aren’t sure?” Nanami parrots, voice pressed and deep.
“I’m a pilot, not a mechanic.” You try to walk away, stumbling over your seatbelt on the way. Above the doorway is a tiny toolbox, simple but effective for minor emergencies. Minor being the keyword. You can tighten a bolt, not fix a warp drive. “I’m just guessing."
The door slides open and the bite of cold air immediately eats into your cheeks and peels your lips, but you press forward, ignoring how your body immediately protests. Both your planet and the Out Station are tepid all year round; you knew snow was cold, but you didn’t realize cold could be painful. Those romantic snowflakes are crystalline weapons in the wind, cutting into your face. No wonder this isn’t considered ‘peak season.’ The cold snatches the breath from your lungs and the flimsy material of your fly suit does nothing to stop it as you jump to the ground. Snow is also slick and you just barely save yourself from falling on your ass. It takes everything in you to walk normally to the hull and begin unscrewing the flap.
Boot steps on the bridge surprise you. Wind tousled and perfectly bracing the weather, the Senator stands at the door, peeking down at you. He’s pulling on a thicker coat and gloves, things you didn’t even know he packed, as he tucks his chin into the fur trim. 
“It’s okay! I’ve got it covered!” you call. The weather might crumple him if he's not careful.
Nanami narrows his eyes as if he knows what you’re thinking and then jumps as well. He handles the ice with much more grace than you with no sign of shivering. Right- this is his home. You’re the one from a hot planet. 
“I just gotta look and make sure it’s not leaking, but I really can’t do anything beyond basic repairs,” you explain, teeth chattering between words, “Do you know any engineers that could possibly…?”
“The only place would be in the city," he says, coat pulled tight. He leans over to inspect, then shakes his head; the law is his wheelhouse, not this. “And I’m afraid that would cost you an arm and a leg.”
“Well, I can’t afford another leg," you blanch, "This one was 200 credits."
He stares at you blankly.
"Because my--"  Bad joke. Instead of explaining, you go back to work.
A couple more twists and the hull pops off suspiciously easy in your hands. Not a good sign. The wiring isn’t neatly draped as it should be, but tangled, the plastic casings cracked and faded. When you push them aside, bits of red and blue crumble into your palm and even more descend into the depths of the engine.  Your legs are bouncing with shivers, the muscles twitching desperately as you scramble for answers. When the way is clear, you shimmy your torso into the hole, moving more bits and pieces until the hyperdrive is fully exposed. 
“Be careful,” The Senator warns. 
The parts of a spaceship are complicated, filled with superconductors and alluvial dampers and inertia controls. You aren’t entirely sure which part is which, but you know the hypermatter core.
And you know it’s not supposed to look like that.
Fragmented glass still holds its shape, but the broken bits are opalescent with pearled beads of liquid. You dip a finger into it and your skin vibrates, physically shaking so hard that the edges of where you begin and the world ends are untraceable.
“Shit, shit, shit.” Your breath curls up as you speak, “Yeah, she’s leaking. Damn.” Cursing makes you feel better, “Damn, damn, damn, shit, it’s eaten into the stellar fuel container too."
There's no way this thing can run. It can't even hold fuel.  Hopefully it holds heat well enough that you don't freeze over before help can come. On second thought- maybe it would be nice to freeze to death. Sounds better than dealing with Mei Mei when you get back.
"It must have been on the fritz and the last slip out of hyper must have pushed it over the edge," you reason. 
“I’ll contact your Out Station and have them send over a new ship to get you home,” Nanami says, shuffling closer. “Come on, let’s get inside.”
A chill has already set into your knuckles, stiff and harsh. You peel back another panel, the metal almost crumbling in your weakened grip. Maker, you almost killed a fucking Senator. If this trip was any longer, you could have been absolutely space dust. 
“It’s okay, sir, I can handle this,” you lie as you blindly twist at spark plugs and knock against the chipped core. Yup-- that sound means this is way above your paygrade.
“You don’t have a jacket and it’s freezing.” Nanami steps towards you, bending over to see for himself,  “Besides the point, hypermatter is toxic. If there’s a leak, you shouldn’t be- well, don’t touch it.”
You pull back your hands from the glass. The Station’s probably been leeching this shit into your water for years; a little more can’t hurt you too much, but the blonde doesn’t seem to agree. He’s on you in three wide strides, taking you by the jumper’s pocket and firmly pulling you from the hull. When you’ve been freed, he clutches your elbow and half bends, just enough to grab a handful of snow and dump it into your bare hand. At first, you feel nothing but fine grit, but as he quickly brushes away the snow and melted bits to replace it with another, the buzzing in your skin pauses. The following chill drives into your senses like a knife. You curl on to your toes reflexively with a whine, but his grip holds you in place. Your other hand clamps down on something as your whole body clenches, curling in towards him reflexively. Maker, you might actually freeze to death; the panic that was keeping you warm was faded, draining through your now sopping wet hand.
Nanami isn’t fazed by your antics. He stays focused on cleaning your hand with handful after handful until he’s satisfied. With every huff and grumble, a smoke of his breath whisps away, brushing by your nose. It’s how you realize you’re so close to him, practically breast to breast. 
“You’re worse than Haibara, I swear,” he chides and his warm breath tickles your cheek again. His teeth close on the leather of his free hand and tug, popping it off of his hand. Rather awkwardly, he jams it on to your hand, none of the fingers finding their holes, “Touching literal poison-- do you have a death wish?”
You're frozen in place and you're not sure you can completely blame the weather.
 “A little,” you manage.
He shoots you a glare. Frost litters his eyelashes. 
“Come on,”  he tugs, “We're going."
"The ship-” The hull is open and collecting snow, the metal already cold enough for ice to stick. 
"-isn’t going to get fixed today." he finishes, “Standing out here isn’t going to fix that.”
“I--” Objections don’t come to mind. The weather must be eating your brain cells too.
“Fine,” you relent, “We’ll call inside.”
“Good.” Nanami nods, “Now Iet go.”
It takes you a second to process. What?”
Nanami gestures down. “Let go of my coat.” 
You realize your hand didn’t clutch the air, but him. Your joints protest as you force your fingers open, releasing the front of his coat, but Nanami doesn't immediately pull away. His gloved hand finds yours, smoothing the knuckles in an overly tender act.
"Your skin is already chapped," he notes under his breath. He frees his other glove and slips in onto you, then goes for the zipper of his coat. Before you can protest, he's gathering the hide and fur in his hands. 
“I couldn’t possibly-” 
“I am the Galactic Senator of this planet,” Nanami says firmly, but with no bite. He throws the jacket over your shoulders. It's oversized and long on him; on you, it trails the ground.  “And I insist that you acquiesce."
Without protection, the weather is getting to him, stripping his cheeks pink. The fog of his breath sticks to his glasses, crystalline patterns forming across their plane. The cold has reclaimed its beauty once again.
“I don't know what acquiesce means," you say, "But okay, Senator."
Fine lines crinkle at the corners of his eyes. “I told you to call me Nanami.”
“Yes, Nanami.”
 He slides the zipper of the coat up. "Let's go, Miss Nine."
part one | part three
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best-overplayed-song · 9 months
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fun facts
"escape" tells the story of a man who decides to cheat on his wife after reading a letter in the personal column of the newspaper by an anonymous woman asking anyone who likes pina coladas and getting caught in the rain to write to her. he writes back, and they plan to meet at a bar the next night and run away together. except... the woman who walks in the door is his wife, who was also planning on cheating and had no idea he was the one who responded. the song ends with the couple rediscovering their love for each other, since apparently even after so many years of marriage they didn't know the other liked pina coladas or making love at midnight
rupert holmes says he doesn't even like pina coladas
"Californication" is about the dark underbelly of Hollywood and how it destroys just as fast as it creates. the lyrics mention Kurt Cobain, silver-screen actors, plastic surgery, the murder of actress and playmate Dorothy Stratten, and teen pregnancy
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betyloca · 1 month
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members of the x-men with a s/o who was in a mutant circus and his/her mutation in which she is a symbiote
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scott summers
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• heard that the new student came from a circus
• I wouldn't ask I wouldn't want to ask and make you uncomfortable
• but he didn't want to miss the opportunity to meet a new student
- Hi, I'm Scott Summers.
- Hello, I'm y/n.
- If you need to get out of here I know how to escape and take you wherever you want
• this boy had no idea what your mutation was, he thought you were very strong
• until he saw you create symbiotic tentacles
• He is impressed by your mutation and offers to help you in your training.
• worries when there are loud sounds that could hurt you
• is impressed with the amount of food you can eat
•He loves your full symbiote form and thinks you're very intimidating, which would help him scare people for fun.
• he lets you work with him so that you can be with him
jean gray
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• found out that a new student had arrived
• She knows where you come from and what your life was like in the circus because she read your mind.
• you were in the courtyard of the mansion when you met her
- Hi I am ..
- y/n I know I'm Jean Gray
- how do you know my name?
- I'm a telepath
- oh can I sit with you?
- of course, why not
• they began to be almost always with her
• One day you showed him your mutation by making claws appear and your arm turning a symbiotic black color.
• You thought you had scared her but she already knew about your mutation. You're glad she wasn't scared.
• She knows what it's like for people to fear you so she doesn't let anyone mess with you.
• He likes to have lunch with you in the mansion garden even though you always end up eating almost everything due to your voracious hunger.
• likes it when you do stunts to impress the
• He likes it when you are in your symbiotic mass form and you are lying on his bed or couch and you are on his chest sleeping while he caresses you.
• I wouldn't let you have fun with her, she's afraid that she'll hurt you with her telepathy.
• He doesn't get scared when he sees your full symbiote form because he knows you would melt at his touch.
kurt wagner
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• he was excited at the idea of making a new friend
• He heard rumors that you came from a circus. He knew what it was like to live there since he was in one.
• you were walking through the hallways lost when you ran into him
- Excuse me, do you know where the classrooms are?
- If you want I can take you
- okay thanks, I'm y/n
- I'm Kurt Wagner
• immediately became your friend
• He doesn't leave your side until he told you that he also lived in a circus
• That's how they began to share experiences of how they lived
• He likes it when you show off your stunts since you were a trapeze artist.
• One day when they were at the mall a guy started making fun of his appearance making him feel horrible.
boy: look that guy looks like a monster hahaha* laughing with his friends*
Kurt: We better go* while looking at the ground*
y/n: hey, the only monster is me, you idiot* while deforming his face making his eyes white and his mouth bigger with sharp fangs*
boy: ooh shit let's go * while he runs with his friends *
• He is impressed by your mutation and likes to ask what else you can do.
• gets worried when there are loud noises and when it happens he covers your ears
• At Christmas I give you headphones to prevent you from hearing the fireworks so they don't hurt you.
• keeps you away from anything flammable wants you to be safe
• He likes it when you are in your symbiotic dough form. He thinks you are very cute. He loves having you in his hands while he feeds you (he likes to concentrate on you).
•When this boy finds out that you can have fun with a person, he feels curious and nervous when you have fun with him.
• when he gets used to it he likes to be with you all the time talking to you while you talk to him in his head
• At first he was scared by your full symbiote form but he didn't mean to. He liked how intimidating you looked but he knows you wouldn't like him
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LWA: To expand on @robinwithay's point some more, I am thinking again about Crowley's equivalent to Aziraphale's stubbornness when it comes to rejecting Heaven. Crowley just will. not. learn. that actions have consequences, and that the responsibility lies with the agent, not some nebulous figure out there somewhere. What's striking, in fact, is that "actions have. consequences" is the closest thing the GO universe has to divine providence in action: when Crowley does something, it comes back to bite his occult arse, without fail, every single time. Shut down the cell phone network? Great, can't call Aziraphale. Make yourself look good to Hell? By golly, Hell is going to give you all the sweet assignments. (From their POV, anyway.) Turn a freeway into a demonic sigil? Whoops, it's on fire when you need to cross it, and also a lot of people are dead. Moreover, not only does the universe keep pointing this out to Crowley, but so do the other characters. In S1e1 alone, Hastur, Aziraphale, and SATAN FOR CRYING OUT LOUD all call him out on the whiny "why me?!" business, and Hell does it again in "The Resurrectionists." ("Off my head on laudanum. Not responsible for my actions!" HELL: Oh honey, no.) Arguably, "why me?" is the /one/ question to which Crowley gets a definitive answer, and he consistently refuses to listen to or learn anything from it.
Gaiman's very deliberate decision to prolong and inflate this aspect of Crowley's character is fascinating, because the Nuremberg Defense moment in the novel is there to put an /end/ to it. I keep harping on the Nuremberg Defense issue because in 1990, that was /topical/, not historical: at the time of publication, the most recent high-profile example of someone Nuremberg Defensing himself out of Nazi-era war crimes was Kurt Waldheim /in 1986/. Pratchett's and Gaiman's point in the novel is that Crowley's--and, more so than in the series, Aziraphale's--refusal to take responsibility for what they've done as Hell's and Heaven's agents leads inexorably to them thinking like, you guessed it, Nazi-era war criminals. But as of the end of S2, Crowley has still not come around to the moral epiphany about this that in the novel, Aziraphale has /first./ Instead, Gaiman's substitute for the Nuremberg Defense, the child murder subplot in S1, is averted in such a way that Crowley doesn't learn anything from it.
Further to the point that @robinwithay and others who responded made, you know who did learn something from the child murder subplot? Aziraphale. I said in an earlier ask that in S1, Aziraphale's own failure in the subplot is that he winds up deferring to Crowley's judgment, despite his own clear discomfort, because he cannot turn to Heaven for moral authority. "You can't kill kids" is not represented as a divine or infernal universal mandate--it's a /human/ mandate that transcends both. (That's entirely in keeping with the point, made in both the book and the series, that humans are capable of both far greater good than angels and far greater evil than demons.) In S2, Aziraphale does what he /should have done/ in S1, and says "no" to Crowley's proposal that Gabriel just be abandoned somewhere. I think people sometimes forget that Crowley, for all that he asks questions and nudges Aziraphale along out of his allegiance to the Heavenly party line, is not the series' moral arbiter. Aziraphale knows that Gabriel is facing "something terrible" and is not sure whether or not he's still "awful," but he does what S2 itself shows by the end to be the right thing. Doing the right thing sometimes means telling Crowley "no" and sticking to that no, just as, in S1, the moment Aziraphale hits on the right question to ask at the airfield, he moves /away/ from Crowley to stand with Adam.
good afternoon LWA!!!💕
okay so i feel some frank warning is due for anyone else reading my reply, especially if you're new around these here parts: what follows beneath the cut is going to be crowley-critical. it's not meant in bad faith, but recognising character shortcomings is important for all characters involved. there is (quite rightly) a lot of critique in relation to aziraphale in the fandom, and this is not in ignorance or denial of that - there are certainly points where aziraphale's actions throughout both seasons are called out, and i agree with a number of them - but a) that's not what im talking about here, that's a different post, and b) similar analysis of crowley is (as far as ive seen personally in the months ive been active) not as common - hence the post. if that's not your bag, fair enough, but take heed!!!✨
can't believe a fandom-specific cw for this is necessary but. here we are
(because i get asked this a fair amount - AWCW: Angel Who Crowley Was) (and just now recognising the grammatical error in this, ah well we move)
the part of crowley's character that does not accept consequences, and seemingly refuses to learn from them, is one of the most intriguing for me. as well as all of the instances that you've listed, this is something that we see as being so inherent to him that it even predates the fall; it's not a trait that is specific to crowley-as-a-demon, but to crowley-as-crowley. for all of the understandable reasons that AWCW felt he should ask questions, should challenge why his hard work and creativity was going to be put to waste as if it were nothing, he outright dismissed aziraphale's frankly prophetic advice that directly delivering criticism to the almighty, even if meant with the best of intentions, might spell for trouble... might even spell for AWCW's own personal ruin.
slightly unrelated, but another note: the mindset of, "if i were in charge", however much it might have been meant offhandedly or innocently, even connotes an incredible amount of hubris that, whilst not wholly condemnable in itself, gives an interesting insight into how crowley views himself from before the fall and going into present day.
AWCW's questions may come from a place of innocence and collaboration, and may speak to how much trust he placed in god/heaven to hear his questions with patience and understanding, but it still remains highly likely that he dismisses aziraphale's warning. and the reason he ignores it, most likely, is because it is not what he wants to hear, nor does it (in his eyes) benefit him to exercise caution. one could go a step further and suggest that this indicates a fatal "crowley knows best" mentality, which the rest of the two seasons doesn't exactly negate. and look - that's fine, ignoring advice is hardly an indictable offence, but if what you're doing goes to shit? that is on you.
shifting into speculation-mode in the absence of any confirmed account of the fall itself, we can presume that AWCW's questions fall on deaf/reticent/dismissive ears, and that will just as likely have left AWCW with a sense of frustration and resentment. i continue to be a really hopeful advocate of AWCW having had a lucifer-parallel narrative; that after what was essentially a dismissal, he may have precipitated (at least) the inception of the fall by way of knowingly or unknowingly planting the seeds of rebellion amongst the eventual-fallen... e.g. "they're not treating us fairly, all of our effort will be for nothing, all in service and deference to 'human beings', i tried to speak to god about it but they won't even hear me out."
i don't think he will have led the rebellion, that doesn't quite seem appropriate to his character, but certainly that he may have sparked the initial machinations, and then - by furfur's account - participated in the war. this, again, would fall in line with crowley's ongoing tumultuous relationship with consequences-borne-from-his-actions.
crowley's unreliable narratorship of his own fall is, by definition, untrustworthy, and as such it's not a given that he was unimpeachable in any participation of it. "i didn't mean to fall" would definitely suggest that it was not his intention, but if we return to the Dead Whale Theory, this is a dead whale that crowley has failed to fully accept, or learn from. he seems - when we consider how he inhabits the role of god (as he sees that role to be, anyway) in how he treats his plants in s1 and the goats in s2 - to be very much of the opinion that he is entirely innocent of any wrongdoing.
and in some respect, he's not wrong - asking questions is not a bad thing, it's a very good thing, and his willingness to do so is one of crowley's greatest assets - but his refusal to heed advice in favour of his own agenda, refusal to accept the answers given even (especially?) when he doesn't like them, to have potentially sparked dissent that led to a war (which he fought in), and his lack of accountability for the results, is where he falls down. im not going to go so far as to call it narcissistic behaviour, that feels a bit extreme, but there are... similarities. he doesn't learn from the whole fiasco in any manner that would indicate self-reflection, and instead seems to have walked away from the fall with his clear-cut conclusion that heaven was wrong, and are in fact The Bad Guys.
certainly, GO proposes that heaven isn't the traditional definition of truth, light, and good that aziraphale hopes that it is intrinsically... but crowley still hasn't reached the point of understanding the rest of what the narrative is saying.
heaven and hell are not always good and bad respectively, but they are not always bad and good respectively either. it's not a simple, 'we're turning this on its head' concept. it is altogether a veeeery grey system that simply exists, and it exists in the way that it always has done since the fall (possibly even before, in heaven's case). it is instead your choice whether or not to be part of that system, if you do not think it is right. if you continue be a part of that system, even if there are stakes involved that would make it difficult or compelling for you to remain and act within that system, you should at least recognise the consequences of your actions, accepting your part in it. this goes for all angels and demons, not just aziraphale and crowley. 'just following orders' may be understandable in some circumstances (e.g. threat to life of yourself or others), but does that mean that you are absolved of all responsibility?
we are, collectively, quick to point out that aziraphale has not fully learnt this, but it's clear that crowley has not either. it also suggests by extension that aziraphale is not always wrong, just as crowley is not always right. where actions-and-consequences are concerned, i'd tentatively wager that aziraphale at least demonstrates a bit more understanding of this than crowley does. aziraphale has been shown to recognise when he is wrong, accept it, and make efforts to correct himself or remedy his erroneous actions moving forward. aziraphale hides the antichrist's location from crowley and holds out hope for a higher power to see reason/do the right thing, but when aziraphale gets the confirmation that heaven isn't going to do the right thing by stopping the apocalypse, the first thing he does is call crowley to tell him about adam. you also then have, as you said, aziraphale physically and figuratively moving to stand with humanity; good and bad are just names for sides, and 'human incarnate' equally embraces both concepts (in their truest meaning) and yet similarly rises above both. this is the side to back; 'our side', to aziraphale, doesn't mean just him and crowley, but humanity too.
alternatively (really grinding at the fall thing here, sorry), even if AWCW did not willfully participate in any goings-on of the rebellion, and the fact that he fell was an incident in which he was blamelessly implicated/scapegoated... well, even then, that does not give him a free-pass for him to continuously believe that he is innocent in all matters that follow. sure, he may have been blameless in the fall, but does that mean he's therefore beyond reproach or above accountability for... everything he does/says that occurs afterwards?
setting up the perfect environment for armageddon? tempting aziraphale to kill the antichrist? giving a group of humans live firearms in order to make a point? abandoning aziraphale and retracting 'our side' when aziraphale asked him for help with hiding gabriel? withholding information from aziraphale that directly concerns him and his safety? i said it in a separate post (mainly because it would have made this one a really ungodly length), but my point remains the same; regardless of his part or not-part in the fall, crowley's character does not develop in this arena, despite incredibly formative experiences that might in fact impart an important lesson upon him*.
*and that lesson - again! - is not that he shouldn't ask questions, but instead that his actions may prove to have consequences that he does not like or want, but must accept anyway, taking accountability for his part in them.
not changing does not mean that he is perfect from (before) the beginning, but instead suggests that he is very comfortable being the same person that he's always been... and in some ways, it's commendable to remain true to oneself, but it's equally not conducive to growth... and crowley still has a lot of growing to do (he has grown since s1: his kindness for one thing absolutely has!).
crowley does not seem to recognise where his lack/refusal of development may have contributed to the breakdown in his and aziraphale's relationship by the end of s2, even if that lack/refusal is not directly referenced in the final fifteen. by this i mean: crowley appears to have a very clear expectation of how he believes aziraphale does - and perhaps should - think and behave. crowley, to crowley's mind, he has the right of it ("crowley knows best"), and that includes him thinking that aziraphale will act in the way he has come to expect as a result of his influence on him. crowley has poked and prodded aziraphale away from heaven's rhetoric and dogma* about what good and right is, which aziraphale desperately needed... but does that mean that aziraphale should replace that belief system with Morality According To Crowley? instead of developing his own ...exactly as aziraphale demonstrates in the final fifteen?
when aziraphale doesn't do what crowley thinks he ought to, instead of crowley considering that his perspective of aziraphale may not actually be reality, he takes it as a betrayal and a rejection of crowley himself. though we won't really know until s3 (and possibly not even then) what crowley was really thinking during the final fifteen, it isn't too impossible a notion that crowley now thinks that aziraphale has chosen heaven over him, and loves heaven more than him. which... after everything that he has seen aziraphale go through, battle, and come to terms with, does he truly think that little of him? that aziraphale would think that little of crowley? if he does, that's an incredibly sad and disappointing prospect. perhaps bold of me to say, but sometimes it seems that there are some specific similarities between crowley and heaven in how they individually view and treat aziraphale.
*whilst crowley encouraging aziraphale to think outside of heaven is a good thing, and aziraphale definitely needs it, it does elicit out a couple of concerning traits from them both that, whilst may be borne from respective senses of powerlessness, they manifest onto each other.
crowley has a hero/saviour complex, which aziraphale encourages. aziraphale encourages it - by his own admission - because he thinks it makes crowley happy. however, what is not clear is whether aziraphale recognises that in allowing this, not only does it potentially suggest that crowley benefits from perceiving aziraphale as incapable of protecting himself, and any ability to protect himself (or indeed crowley! 1941!) threatens what crowley thinks is his place in aziraphale's existence, but also that aziraphale himself is projecting what he doesn't get from heaven/god onto crowley.
it similarly isn't clear whether crowley realises that not only he has been - in part - substituted for god/heaven in aziraphale's eyes because he provides the love, acceptance and confirmation of worth that aziraphale has craved since time immemorial, but also that in keeping information from aziraphale that directly concerns him, crowley is nurturing an environment where aziraphale will make decisions according to the limited information he has. we even have a suggestion of this in the final fifteen: to aziraphale's mind, it won't be crowley that protected him from heaven's threat of erasure from the BOL (ie. crowley didn't tell him), it was the metatron. (and if aziraphale finds out about/puts together, in s3, the sheer amount and scale of information that crowley kept from him, there is going to be the hard conversation of whether trust between them can exist as it has before, built over thousands of years).
just as crowley has an arguably skewed perception of aziraphale, aziraphale has a skewed perception of him in return (the levels of codependency are off the charts, lads). it's not a unique observation to say that they both need this break in order to renegotiate within themselves how they view each other, but it's no less true for being repeated.
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sadboislovebeans · 6 months
Note
Hey ! Can I requestJason Dean x reader (she/her) where the reader is getting a lot of male attention and Jason get jealous, but reader calm him down and assure him that she love him ect...
Hey!! Sorry it took so long, I'm back in school and it's taking up quite a bit of my time, but I do try to put in a little bit each day when I do have time :) I realize you probably meant that JD and reader (most likely you ;P) were already together, but I went the friends to lovers route :>
JD watches as Kurt and Ram stand on either side of you, leaning next to your locker with sly smiles on their faces. He doesn't care what they're saying, he doesn't care what you're saying. He wants them out of his sight and away from you, he wants them gone. You quickly notice his gaze, dipping between Kurt and Ram grateful to get away from those two as you rush over to your best friend
"Hey, I was wondering where you were!" You say as he keeps his gaze off of you, a sour expression on his face as he closes his locker a little too hard, making some freshman next to him flinch like a gunshot just went off before scrambling away. You know something is wrong immediately as he doesn't act like this often. "Hey, what's going on?" You ask him, leaning back against the locker next to him, leaning so your face comes into his vision. JD takes a deep breath through his nose, trying not to lash out at you, as he knows you did nothing wrong. But he can't stop the fire burning within him, up his back and chest and into his brain, making his whole intentions fuzzy with pure anger. He shouldn't be this jealous over his best- and only- friend, you should be able to flirt with people, be flirted with, go on dates with anyone you want without him hating them with a burning passion that rivals even the hottest flames of hell.
"JD, come on. Are you alright?" You ask him. You have no idea what gets him like this, you just hope it's not something you did. He takes a couple deep breaths, scrunching his eyes shut. His chest feels like it's caving in, just breathe, in and out, in and out, in and- fuck it. "No, why would I be? All the time, I have to watch guys flock to you like you're some sort of goddess, I can't stand it!" He says, hitting his locker by accident. Well, you think it's an accident. "What? You're not my boyfriend, you have no right to be jealous of guys that I don't even like." You say, crossing your arms. It pains you to say it, but it was a knee-jerk reaction. One that you wish you could've thought about, because now you kinda seem like a jerk to the boy you like who also just happens to be your best friend. He sighs, rolling his eyes and running his hands through his hair. "But I want to be. That's the whole damn point, I don't want to watch these guys crowd around you all the time, call me selfish but I want it to just be me." He says.
You're stunned, you can feel your face go both cold and hot at the same time, you don't even know what to do. "What?" You finally manage to say. "Yes!" He says in an exasperated tone of voice. The bell rings and he walks away, only for you to follow him. "JD, come on, don't just walk away!" You say, and you can't help the smile tugging at the corners of your lips. When you finally catch up to him, he looks even more annoyed than before, and this time it is kind of at you. "Why the hell are you smiling? This is funny to you?" He spits, and you smile only wider."Im tired of them too, but that's not the point." You say. JD looks kind of pissed, but he's going to listen to what you say, because you're the only person he'd ever trust, and he doesn't want to change that now. "The point is, that I love you, Jason." You tell him. His whole face becomes one of shock and just.. awe. "What." He says, it doesn't even sound like a question.
"I said I love you. And only you. So-" You start, but the bell rings again. The halls are empty and the school security guard starts to do that slow waddle/walk thing towards you both, so you both bolt in separate directions and try to get to class before you're caught without hall passes. You might have gotten to class late, and your teacher is totally pissed, but you could really care less.
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Yandere X men and Brotherhood and tot reader who was made using all of their DNA (making them their shared sibling)
Ohoho! THAT is going to cause a LOT of fighting! But... it MAY just bring them all together- Let's try it:
They dealt with crazy every week.
They dealt with Sentinels, dealt with Magneto and the Professor and their weird relationship, even dealt with anti-mutant jerks.
They didn't know how to deal with a toddler who somehow shared all their DNA.
"How... how is that even possible?" Scott asks, taking a seat like he's about to faint.
"When did anyone get all of our DNA? Who took it, the government?" Lance snorts, pacing.
"Well, seems like the little dawg is related tos all of us, so... which one of us gets to keep 'em?" Toad chips in.
"..."
"Well, obviously not you!" Kitty says. "They'd be better off with us!"
"Yeah! Ve're great vith kids!" Kurt adds, picking up the tiny tot, who happily hits his arm.
"Why should y'all get to keep 'em? You already have plenty of team members," Fred mumbles. Todd hops up onto his shoulder, then snags the tot with his tongue, depositing them in his arms.
"Ew! Keep your slimy hands off of them!" Rogue hisses, going over and trying to grab the toddler back.
"Toad. Hand them to me," Wanda orders, butting in and stepping on several feet to get there.
"Why should they be with you? We're cooler," Evan calls out from by the window, only to almost be knocked over by Pietro, who speeds around the room.
"HA, in your dreams, Daniels! Obviously WE are cooler!" Pietro chortles.
The room soon devolves into shouts and yelling as the teens argue over who gets to keep their new sibling, soon forgetting that the little tyke is still in there with them... Until-
"Baaaaaaaaah!"
The tot starts crying, loud enough that the nearest mutants cover their ears in pain.
"Shhh, shhhh, sweetie, it's okay," Rogue says, quickly powering through the discomfort and picking up the crying toddler.
"Hey, it's okay, little rock," Lance tries, soon rubbing their back as they start calming down.
"Yes, please stop crying, vittle one. You can even pet me! Yes, pet the fluffy kitty, right?" Kurt adds, and soon the various teenagers are crowding them, promising to stop fighting and to do whatever the tiny tot wants, apologizing for making them upset.
"Guys..." Scott starts. The others turn to look at him. "I think... that Reader just united our teams."
"Holy Mother of Rocks... You're right," Lance gasps quietly.
The teens look at their tater tot, who's happily playing with Kurt's tail and Toad's webbed hand. It doesn't take them any longer to call a truce, and to set up a schedule so they all get to spend time with their little sibling.
What they didn't know was that the adults were listening in from the next room over, and making their own plans to hang out with their new child...
Who knew such a little tot could unite the two bickering teams for good?
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toxinoire · 8 months
Text
This is gonna be a wild ride. (Mean Girls + Heathers skit)
Inspired by something I saw on Tiktok
~~~~
Janis: Isn't the party tomorrow?
Cady: Apparently, it's a week long party.
Janis: Oh.
Gretchen: That explains why the guests are arriving now and well...every other day ago.
Karen: What's everyone supposed to do then?
Aaron: Not sure.
Damian: Yeah, Jan, can you greet some of them?
Janis: Yeah I guess.
(At the door)
Janis: Hey Kurt Kelly, you can put your stuff over there.
Kurt: Woo, didn't expect to be greeted by a hottie like you.
Janis: Dude, I'm gay-
Janis: REGINA DID YOU JUST PUNCH HIM-
~~~~
Janis: Ram Sweeney, over there.
Ram: You look tense sweetheart.
Ram: Need a hug~
Janis: Oh no I don't-
Janis: REGINA STOP PUNCHING PEOPLE-
(Later)
Janis: Alright then, Heather Chandler. You can put your stuff over there.
Janis: ...And...who are you? And why do we look alike?
Veronica: Uh- Huh, we do look alike... Anyway...
Veronica: I'm her friend, Veronica Sawyer.
Janis:
Janis: Interesting.
Veronica: I have a bad feeling about this.
~~~~~
Janis: Ah you're from Ohio...
Veronica: Oh fuck off. Anyway, the party is tomorrow?
Janis: It appears so.
Janis: So that blonde demon you were with..?
Veronica: Oh you mean Heather? Yeah, she kinda just dragged me into this. I didn't want to go.
Janis: Relatable
Janis: And you have a thing for her, right?
Veronica: HUH- She's my friend...
Janis: *wheezes*
Janis: Oh wait, you were serious?
(Later)
Veronica: Oh, hi Heather.
Janis: *whispers* Wait, watch this.
Veronica: Wait, what? No-
Janis: Hey, Heather, you'll be happy to know that you're little friend over here just got asked to the party by that boy Kevin G.
Veronica: *whisper shouts* No I wasn't.
Janis: Shhh.
Janis: See, look how upset she is as she storms away!
Veronica: Why are you saying that like it's a good thing?
Janis: Oh, I have so much to teach you.
Regina: Janis, who's this?
Regina: And why does she look a lot like you?
Janis: Oh Regina. This is my new friend, Veronica Sawyer.
Veronica: *awkwardly* Hi...
Janis: Anyway, Reggie, you gonna ask anyone to the party.
Regina: Uh-
Regina: No one.
Janis: No one?
Janis: Uh- well I just got asked. And I said yes-
Janis: Asked by- Heather Chandler-
Janis: Yeah.
Janis: Oh you look mad-
Janis, walking away: *to herself* Yeah that was a bad choice...
Veronica: Does she always lack that much self awareness?
Cady: Yeah.
Veronica: AH- Oh it's just another human being.
Cady:
Cady: What.
Veronica: Anyway, don't worry Regina. I'm sure Heather treats her dates well.
Veronica: Judging by the rage in your eyes, I made things worse.
~~~~
Janis: Yoooo Heather Chandler, right? I take it you're enjoying the shit in this party.
Janis: Anyway, so I'm gonna you to pretend to be my date to the party to make Regina jealous.
Heather: What? No-
Janis: Oh, I wasn't asking you, I was telling you.
Heather: I-
Heather: *realizes it could possibly help her situation with Veronica*
Heather: Fine.
Janis: Nice.
Veronica: How did you do that?
Janis: I don't know, but it doesn't matter.
Veronica: Your friends must have a hard time dealing with you.
Janis: Don't take Damian and Cady's side-
(Later)
Veronica: Hi, Regina?
Veronica: Sorry to interrupt you throwing darts at a picture of...Heather...
Veronica: I was just wondering, if you didn't want Janis to go to the party with Heather, why didn't you just ask her yourself?
Regina: *throws dart at Veronica*
Veronica: *dodges* Okay, so you two clearly don't do well with logic.
~~~~~
Janis: Heather, this is a disaster.
Janis: Especially since the party is tomorrow and we both know you'd rather go with Veronica and I'd rather go with Regina.
Heather: What- I don't wanna-
Janis: Oh, don't try to lie. This isn't my first rodeo.
Heather: ...Okay yeah, I wanna go with Veronica.
Janis: See? Was that so hard to admit?
~~~~
Veronica: Okay, Regina, is there anything you'd like to say to Janis?
Regina: Uh-
Regina:
Regina: Get me punch.
Veronica:
Janis: Bitch- okay fine. *leaves*
Veronica: Dude why?
Veronica: You could've just- you had the chance to- ugh.
Veronica: Heather, these people are insane.
Heather: Yeah, I can see that.
Veronica: Geez, this is why you should never fall for someone you're friends with that you used to hate.
Veronica: Especially when they're THAT oblivious!
Heather: ...
Veronica: Why are you looking at me like that?
(The next day)
Janis: This is the last party I'm ever going too.
Janis: Would you get in here?
Veronica: I feel ridiculous.
Janis: The fuck you mean? You look awesome.
Janis: Oh, and there's your date. Kevin, get over here!
Veronica: Is he reading a calculus book?
Janis: Oh, I forgot to mention that most of the things he talks about is math.
Janis: Anyway- have fun!
Veronica: Oh that bitch.
~~~~
Janis: Yo Heather, you clean up nice.
Heather: Obviously.
Janis: Well aren't you cocky.
(Meanwhile)
Veronica: Hi Regina, are you ok?
Regina: Yeah, why?
Veronica: Cause you're very angrily staring at Heather and Janis.
Veronica: And you just poked a hole through your paper cup.
Veronica: The punch is dripping on the carpet.
~~~~
Janis: Hey Heather- you have something in you hair-
Janis: Oh shit, my bracelet is stuck.
Janis: Maybe if I turn this way...
Veronica: Oh, are they about to k- AH!
Janis: AH!
Janis: Oh shit, Regina just pushed her to the table.
Veronica: OUR BLONDES ARE GONNA KILL EACH OTHER!
Janis: Entertainment.
Veronica: What- Why do you have that look on your face?
Janis: Oh, I'm not wearing a bracelet.
Veronica: Oh you sick son of a bitch.
Janis: Alright Regina! Get her with your left hook!
Veronica: WHY ARE YOU ENCOURAGING THIS?!
Janis: Oh, cause it's fun.
Veronica: It's my fault for asking...
Veronica: ALRIGHT THAT'S IT YOU TWO BREAK IT UP!
Veronica: Shit, Heather, are you okay?
Heather: I mean, my face is swollen so no.
Veronica: Yeah, let me see. Does it hurt that bad?
Heather: It stings, yeah.
Veronica: Okay, don't worry, we can put an ice pack on that and you'll be fine.
Janis, watching them: My work here is done.
Janis:
Janis: Oh hey Reggie- you got a little bruise over there- Oh you look angry.
Regina: Heh, come here. *starts chasing Janis*
Janis: Regina don't be rash- *runs away*
Veronica: There goes the two most dysfunctional people I've ever met.
Veronica: Heather, why are you laughing?
Veronica: Wait...Were you in on that?
Heather: Pfft- Yeah.
Veronica: *smacks Heather at the back of her haad* You big idiot! I was so worried about you!
Veronica: I mean not you- I was worried because um-
Heather: Pfft-
Veronica: Shut up.
(The next day)
Veronica: Yeah, so we're heading out.
Janis: Really? Well, have a safe trip back. It was nice meeting you.
Veronica: Yeah...you know what, here's my phone number.
Veronica: If you ever wanna talk about anything, just give me a call.
Janis: Aww that's sweet. But I already got it from Heather yesterday. I already left six messages.
Veronica: Of course you did.
Veronica: Well, good luck with Regina.
Janis: Oh thanks, good luck with Heather.
Veronica: Oh thanks, but Heather and I really are just friends. Anyway, bye!
Janis: Whatever you say Ronnie. Have fun with that. Bye!
Janis: I miss being that stupid.
Damian:
Cady:
Gretchen:
Karen:
Aaron:
Damian: You're still-
Janis: I meant THAT level of stupid, Damian.
~~~~
That was wild. I don't know what this was lol.
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fallevs · 2 months
Text
Day four of the @klaineccfanficlibrary event ❤️
This fourth poem is called What will tomorrow bring? and it's set at the very beginning.
When Kurt wasn't understood, neglected and ignored by everyone. When Kurt was suffering but no one noticed or pretended there was no problem. Because a boy cannot cry. A boy has to be strong, make his armor, can't feel emotions.
A boy cannot lock himself in his room in despair, have only blank pages to vent.
Tears wet the sheets, crinkle the paper. He doesn't feel like using strong, bright colors. He doesn't feel that way. He feels dull, lonely, gray, melancholy.
He dreams of a big love, a love that makes him feel finally enough and not wrong. He imagines a reassuring smile that warms his heart. And that helps him get through his nights. Sometimes, not always. Sometimes imagining is all he can do to keep from sinking. Hold on to something. Trust the unknown. But is there actually someone on the other side?
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I'm so tired of being lonely
I still have some love to give.
I walk
alone and
ignored.
Of disappointments I've had
too many, I fear.
At night I lie down and think:
"Will I make it to tomorrow?"
It would be much easier to
wake up
satisfied and
happy, but—
But the night is getting long
and I'm tired of tossing and turning
until dawn
with this deep fear of
loneliness,
my faithful companion.
The days go by fast,
fade away without a thread
of hope.
But I will still make it,
I guess.
In the meantime I dream of
kind, warm eyes and
sweet smiles and
strong hands that hold
mine.
I dream of
soft lips chasing mine and
fingers
touching.
A sparkle.
I imagine a love
like the one in novels;
the one I don't know
if I will ever have.
I just want someone
somewhere
someday
to handle me with care.
kh
———————————————————————
But then the next day comes. It always comes even unwillingly. It comes and he has to go ahead, do things, see people, go along with strange ideas just to not turn anyone against him because otherwise it's over, he can't afford to lose everything.
He puts on his best jacket and goes out. "I'll be quick," he tells himself. "Just a couple of hours and I'll go home and wait for the night."
But what if something happens instead? What if someone is waiting for him, even though this someone may not know it yet, because he is just as scared as he is? Someone who, without knowing him, without questioning, without prejudice, takes his hand just for the sake of it, and Kurt– he starts imagining again. The mind races, it races fast. There is this boy, so different than usual, smelling of raspberries and hope that– is singing him a song? Oh dear. Kurt can't take it. He is so embarrassed, he's blushing so hard. But he can't stop looking at him...
And the boy, this Blaine, smiles back at him– and maybe that's happiness, at last?
Surely, tomorrow, he can use bright colors and finally smile a little.
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Welcome to To Daydream Believers : A Community Klaine FanWorks Blog
Hello Everyone!
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Welcome and Re-Welcome to To Daydream Believers!!
I know the blog has been around forever, but with the influx of new people I thought I'd refresh the blog and welcome everyone again! I've been wanting to give the blog a facelift for a while, and it seems now is as good a time as any to reintroduce and reinvigorate the blog.
What is TDBFic?
I originally started the blog as the fanfiction reblogging sideblog to my original Glee/Klaine rewatch, fun&games, and podcasting blog - @todaydreambelievers. TDB isn't being run any more, but I've always maintained that as long as there is interest - I'd keep the blog going.
The intention of the blog was to be a safe space where fans of Kurt Hummel and Blaine Anderson could read works (about them individually or as a couple) without fear of running into bashing of either character. It was also meant to be a community blog where anyone could choose to participate on their own terms.
Becoming a Member -
Whether you're an author who would like a place to showcase their works or just a fan who'd like to recommend their favorite fics, anyone is allowed to be a member. All you need to do is shoot me -- @spaceorphan18 -- a message, and I'll make you a member. All I ask is that you follow (my relatively few) guidelines.
Also - even if you become a member, there's no obligation to reblog content, but the option is always open!
Guidelines -
So what are the guidelines?
All fanworks must be Kurt Hummel friendly and Blaine Anderson friendly. While that doesn't mean bad things can't happen to them - it does mean that a fan of either character can read a work and not feel like their favorite character is being intentionally bashed.
Be respectful of other users.
A couple of smaller items such as - please reblog, don't post and don't spam. Some basic common curtesy things.
That's really it. I'll have some more details on a main page when I get that up. But really, it boils down to play nice.
What about tagging?
You don't have to tag - but it is encouraged so people can find your works if they click on one of our links. I'm working on cleaning up the tagging page so that the tagging system is clear and easy to use.
What about all the old stuff?
It's not going anywhere - though please bear with me as I try to clean up the main page. You should be able to find all of the old content, as I don't plan on taking anything down.
Anything new to the blog?
Why yes! I have some ideas for ways to keep the activity up on the blog...
Author Spotlights -- Every week we would highlight a author or artist - featuring their works on the blog. I'd like to do this again! I'll get more details out soon - but anyone is welcome to participate, even if they've done it already!
Prompts & Tropes -- I'm not sure how I'd like to implement these, but I thought it'd be fun if we occasionally did prompts or trope weeks to inspire you to create new things.
Events -- We haven't been event heavy, but @snarkyhag and I are already thinking of something fun to do for this summer!
Polls -- Okay, so this isn't entirely creation focused, but back in the day, TDB did polls every Tuesday. Now that tumblr has a fun, new polling system, I thought I'd bring these back - because why not?
Questions, Comments, Concerns?
I'm really open to anything you guys might have to say! Please drop a line any time you like -- I'm always happy to hear from you!
I do encourage you to come join and be a member! The more the merrier!
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Happy Creating!
Xoxo- Spaceorphan18 :)
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Quinn x fem R where they’re secretly dating and Quinn isn’t out yet, R comes over looking for Q so they can go on a date but she’s with Rachel or someone and R gets the jealous look bc she knows Rachel likes Quinn.
Judy is like: I wouldn’t worry about Rachel, they might be friends but I know Quinn and she only has eyes for you.
R is like: Oh…No! No! No!…I’m not…
Judy: 😑🤨 *looks at R’s clothes and how they’re sitting*
R: *not sitting normally and wearing so much flannel*
Okay…
Judy: I’m her mother, I know things, I’ll wait until she’s ready but I already knew the second you came in and picked her up to ‘go to the movies with Kurt and Mercades’
R: We did go to the movies!
Judy: yes but you went alone and had dinner after…I’m just glad you treat her better than that Puckerman.
Q: What’s going on here?
Judy: Just talking about your ‘friends’ offer to volunteer at the clothing drive at our church
R: *nods*
*later*
Q: You don’t have to do the drive you know?
R: Yeah I know, Just want to test the theory of me going up into flames when I set foot in there.
Q: If I can get in so can you 😭
*starts making out*
*Judy’s singing gets louder so they push away and R just smirks bc she knows Judy is doing it on purpose to scare Quinn and give her a push into coming out*
Judy: Here’s your laundry Quinnie, (R) you have her lipstick on your neck and Quinnie you’ve got a very dark hickey. So let’s be honest sweetheart. I don’t care. I’m just glad you won’t get pregnant again. *leaves*
Quinn x Reader
With excited steps, you make your way to the front door of the Fabray house. There was a planned date with Quinn and you were buzzing with anticipation. You and Quinn had been dating for a good while now, especially by Quinn's usual standards. You were the one who stuck around for the longest and you intended to stay.
Of course, being Quinn's first girlfriend had its downsides. Well, one downside. You had to keep your relationship a secret. Quinn wasn't out to anyone yet and wasn't ready to do so yet. It didn't bother you though. You understood the struggles of taking control of your queerness. If you hadn't been forced yourself, it would've taken a while for you to come out as well.
But now wasn't the time for thinking like that. You're knocking on the door and ready to enjoy a night with Quinn. You grin brightly when the door opens and it doesn't fade even when Quinn's mother, Judy, answers the door.
"Oh! Hey Ms. Fabray. Is Quinn here?"
Judy smiles fondly at you before inviting you in. "Hello, Y/N. Quinnie isn't home right now." You plop down on the couch while Judy grabs a drink for you. "She's with Rachel right now. Something about a duet for Glee."
When she hands you a glass of water, she notices the frown on your face. You couldn't hold it back. You knew Rachel had a thing for Quinn. And since you and Quinn were a secret, Rachel was constantly trying to worm her way into the blonde's good graces. It annoys you, but you don't have any way to deal with it without outing Quinn.
The feeling of someone soothing your brow draws you out of your mind. Blinking a few times, you look up at the older woman smiling at you with a bit of amusement on her face.
"Oh, don't worry about Rachel, dear. They may be friends, but I know Quinn only has eyes for you."
You blink again. And a few more times before you sputter an almost incoherent line of words.
"Wh-uh... No. We aren't... I'm not! Quinn's definitely not. We haven't... Uhh.. nah. No. We uhh.. ummm..."
When you finally stop trying to explain yourself, your eyes cautiously land on Judy only to see an amused look on her face. As soon as she knows she has your attention, her eyes pointedly move to look at your clothes and the way you were sitting. Suddenly self-conscious, you take a look at yourself.
You were wearing skinny jeans with boots. A t-shirt covered your torso and a flannel shirt covered that. The sleeves of that flannel were rolled up to your elbows and your forearms had bracelets and a leather cuff adorned on them. The way you sat didn't help either seeing how you had your legs spread out with your elbows resting on your thighs. Almost immediately you sit a bit more proper.
"You uh... You have a point." You rub the back of your neck in anxiety. This wasn't how you wanted to come out to Quinn's mother. Said woman just gives you a fond smile.
"It's all right, Y/N. I'm a mother. I've known about you two for a long time. Ever since you picked her up to go to the movies," her hands rise to form air quotes, "'with Kurt and Mercedes.'"
"But we did go to the movies!" You countered. The elder woman just raised an eyebrow. It was eerily similar to Quinn's.
"Yes you did. Alone. And you went to dinner afterwards. Alone." She moves to sit closer to you and pats your head. "Like I said. It's all right. I'm just glad you treat her better than Noah."
You smile at Judy, who had very quickly become a second mother to you when you first met. Her hand cups your face and you almost tear up at the amount of love and acceptance in her eyes. The moment doesn't last as Quinn opens the door and enters the home. Judy's hand drops to your shoulder when the young blonde's eyes land on the both of you.
"What's going on here?" She asks, a little apprehensive. Her mother just stands and brushes off her skirt of invisible dust.
"Nothing at all, Quinnie. I was just talking to your..." Judy gives you a look. "Friend about the clothing drive at the church. She volunteered to help us out." You give a grin and nod.
"Yup. More than happy to help out."
Quinn just looks at the two of you with suspicion before grabbing your arm and ushering you to her room.
"Okay then... C'mon Y/N."
When you're finally in her room, she closes the door.
"You know you don't have to do the drive." She shakes her head at you. You just shrug.
"Eh. Honestly I'm just curious to see if I'll really burst into flames when I step foot on holy ground." Quinn rolls her eyes with a soft laugh. She pulls you close and wraps her arms around your neck.
"If I can go into a church, you definitely can." You just answer with a smirk before pressing your lips against hers.
Quinn lets out a soft hum of approval and pushes you towards her bed. Your knees hit the edge of the bed and you sit down, allowing Quinn to crawl onto and straddle your lap. You pull her impossibly closer and let your hands roam her body. Her own hands comb through your hair, gently pulling at it to tip your head back and expose your neck. As soon as that happens, her lips are kissing up and down your neck. A low moan escapes your lips and your hands move to caress her thighs, touching the skin hidden under her dress. Eventually, you need your mouth to do more and you duck your head to attack the blonde's neck. Her head tilts back and she clings onto you as your teeth and tongue assault her skin.
Your hands almost reach a little higher on her thighs when you suddenly hear Judy's voice coming towards you, singing 'Papa Don't Preach.' Quinn immediately pushes you away and hops off of your lap to the spot next to you. You're now on your back, trying to get your breathing back in check. By the time you manage to sit up, a knock sounds on the door and opens.
"Quinnie! I have your laundry." The older blonde waltzes on in to drop the hamper off. Taking a quick glance at the two of you, she almost laughs. Quinn is blushing hard and trying not to look at you or her mother. You're wearing an amused smirk on your face. Judy walks up to you and fixes your hair.
"Honey, you have some lipstick on your neck." You absent-mindedly wipe at the spot Quinn's lips were once at. She then turns to Quinn and places her hand on her daughter's chin to turn her head.
"And you are going to have a very dark hickey." She pointedly looks at you, causing you to bashfully look away. The woman places her hands on her lips and looks at you both.
"I'll be honest. I don't care that you're together. I'm glad to see how happy you two are. I'm just happy you won't get pregnant again." She kisses you both on the cheek and heads out the room, closing the door. You and Quinn just gape at the door before looking at each other.
"Heh..." You start. "At least we don't have to hide from your mom anymore?" Quinn just lets out a scoff of disbelief.
"That was... Surprisingly easy."
"Your mom just wants you to be happy. She loves you." The blonde smiles at that.
"I love her too..." She turns to look at you. "And I love you."
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himboskywalker · 3 months
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Thank you so much for these many recommendations, i will definitely read some of them. I finally ordered lord of the rings, always wanted to do it but I finally did it.
I would love a separate rec list of less new books and overall classics. If you have the time of course. I always have a hard time finding new books for myself or to gift to other people.
Sure! And I'm ecstatic to hear you bought lotr! Another one to be welcomed into my fold! This list is decidedly less organized, but here's a list of more classic/ older works I always recommend or gift to people.
Anything written by our beloved Neil Gaiman. He's most well known, especially in this sphere, for "Good Omens" cowritten by Terry Pratchett, and rightfully so. If you've never read anything by either author, it is absolutely worth the hype, and even if you've watched the tv show, it is so incredibly funny and wonderful. "American Gods" is also phenomenal and very well known from its tv show now, but my personal favorite of Gaiman's is "Anansi Boys." No one does urban fantasy like him, and his works will always be the gold standard for me for this genre.
The Discworld series by Terry Pratchett. There's 41 books in the series so it's a mighty undertaking, I myself haven't gotten through all of them yet, I think I have about ten books left. They are so wonderfully funny and philosophical and witty. I don't recommend reading the books in the order Pratchett wrote them, rather there are collections in the series you'll want to read in order. The Death collection and City Watch books are my favorites but there are many more than that you may like better.
"The Princess Bride" by William Goldman. This is one of my favorite books of all time and while the movie certainly gets the vibe, it's a whole different animal. It's just so incredibly funny and fun and smartly written, and I've given it to many family and friends for Christmas and birthday presents.
"The Lies of Locke Lamora" by Scott Lynch. This is commonly regarded as a fantasy genre must and I often vehemently disagree with what's considered a "classic" but I have to side with the powers that be in the lit community on this one. It's just damn well written and character driven in the exact kind of way I love in stories. If you start reading it and think "oh look morally gray thief characters doing a heist" just remember, Lynch published it in '06 and pretty much wrote the template for everyone who has copied him since.
Anything by Ursula Le Guin although I read the "Earthsea" series first and would recommend starting there as well. She just really is that bitch, it doesn't get better written or more observant of life than her. Outside of Tolkien I don't know if there's anyone I admire more as an author than Le Guin. Her prose are not only stunningly gorgeous, but line after line after line hits like a sucker punch to the side of the head for how she makes you see life and yourself in new ways. “Only in silence the word, only in dark the light, only in dying life: bright the hawk's flight on the empty sky.”
The Redwall series by Brian Jacques! I love them so dearly, they're fun and beautifully written and full of adventuring that only forest animals with swords are capable of. I do recommend reading them in order, or at least the original "Redwall" before you dive into the rest of the series, but "Taggerung" is my favorite.
This is a more divisive rec nowadays but Kurt Vonnegut. If you read "Slaughterhouse Five" in school and hated it I don't blame you, it's not my favorite of his and not what I urge people to look to if they want to fall in love with him like I did when I was a teenager. My favorite Vonnegut is "Sirens of Titan" and "Breakfast of Champions." Do look at content warnings for "Sirens of Titan" and I've seen a lot of vitriolic reviews of the book in recent years by younger readers, but I absolutely think it's worth the read and the shining glorious example of what I mean when I say protagonists aren't meant to be liked or morally right.
And speaking of squicky divisive recs! May I tell you about our lord and savior of "oh god I don't know if I can get through this" Margaret Atwood? Most people know her for "Handmaid's Tale" but I first read "Oryx and Crake." Seriously, read the content warnings, but Atwood is known for writing the best of speculative sci-fi for a reason.
Anything by Octavia Butler. My intro to her was through "Bloodchild" which I highly recommend, and I think is the perfect introduction to her brand of unnerving brilliance. She is most well known for "Kindred" and rightfully so.
"Perfume" The Story of a Murderer" by Patrick Suskind. It's weird, by god it's weird, and it's one of my absolute favorite "classic lit" novels. In 18th century France a weird little freak of a guy with a super sense of smell winds up murdering a bunch of people to make perfume. It's fantastic and the quintessential, I will not morally justify this, but boy am I enjoying reading about this little creep.
"Trainspotting" by Irvine Welsh. I also love "Filth" and "Porno" by him. I think Welsh is brilliant at characterization, especially when most of his characters are morally bankrupt and terrible. But what he does best is make you feel for these characters who have often put themselves in these terrible positions. They're just people, and life is shitty, and I don't think anyone writes that better than Welsh.
"The Things They Carried" by Tim O'Brien. O'Brien made a career of writing fictionalized recounts of his time in Vietnam. I love everything he's written, he is one of my favorite modern lit authors, but "The Things They Carried" is his best known work and what I first read of his. It's brilliant and beautiful and sad, and it was the first time I ever had to put a book down and read in chunks because it affected me so emotionally.
Cormac McCarthy, any and everything he has ever written. He's best known for "The Road" of course, and it's certainly worth the read but "Blood Meridian" is my absolute favorite of his. His stuff is brutal and wry and full of the dry irony that only the bleakness of reality offers, and by god is it well written.
And finally I'll leave you with a single nonfiction recommendation. I try to keep those minimal when I know that's not usually what people are looking for when they ask for reading recs. But since I'm giving a list of books I have often gifted, I can't NOT include this one. "Man's Search for Meaning" by Victor Frankl. I read this at 18 and it had a profound impact on how I think and view life. Any time someone I love has gone through a difficult time I've bought them their own copy.“For the first time in my life I saw the truth as it is set into song by so many poets, proclaimed as the final wisdom by so many thinkers. The truth - that Love is the ultimate and highest goal to which man can aspire. Then I grasped the meaning of the greatest secret that human poetry and human thought and belief have to impart: The salvation of man is through love and in love.”
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