#it's midnight and i have a habit of overthinking a lot during these hours

[wixhing0nastar]

I’ve headcanoned for a little while now that Luz has undiagnosed BPD and this latest episode really solidified that thought for me.

(Spoilers and lots of mental health talk below)

TLDR: Luz exhibits enough BPD symptoms to in theory get diagnosed, without falling into harmful stereotypes. Which is really cool in a world where BPD is currently so heavily stigmatized.

I’m going to steal a definition for BPD from NAMI, because I’ve found a lot of people misunderstand what BPD is and assume it’s just someone being uncontrollably angry when it’s a whole lot more than that.

“Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is a condition characterized by difficulties regulating emotion. This means that people who experience BPD feel emotions intensely and for extended periods of time, and it is harder for them to return to a stable baseline after an emotionally triggering event.”

(Note it doesn’t say that these feelings come out of nowhere, just that you have trouble regulating them).

Additionally, BPD’s kinda baseline driving force (especially in social settings) is a severe fear of abandonment by the people closest to you (source: my therapist, who diagnosed and is treating my BPD currently).

Looking at the diagnostic criteria, some of them would be hard to prove given we can’t really get inside Luz’s head (like splitting for example) but others are pretty blatant in the show. For example:

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment by friends and family.

Luz has a habit of going way above and beyond to try to keep the people in her life happy with her, sometimes even to the detriment of her own health (and often making things worse in her attempts).

Examples: Hosting the Midnight Conjuring for Gus and Willow even though Eda had said no (106). Agreeing to stay in the human realm with her mom even though the thought makes her miserable (210). Not telling Amity that she attacked the Abomitron because she was scared Amity would get upset (214).

Distorted and unstable self-image, which affects moods, values, opinions, goals and relationships.

This one’s a little harder to point to in the show but feels like such an important part of Luz’s character at the same time.

I think the best example of this is in Separate Tides. We see Luz blaming herself for what happened to Eda (and Lilith) and acting out because of it. We also see this very prominently in Hunting Palismen where Luz’s inner turmoil is revealed to be bad enough she can’t even get a palismen to bond with her because she doesn't know who she is deep down yet.

Impulsive behaviors that can have dangerous outcomes

Luz literally ran away from home to live with a total stranger (love you Eda) in another realm that’s so dangerous basically everything tries to kill you.

Like there are plenty of examples throughout the show but it’s also the entire premise.

Periods of intense depressed mood, irritability or anxiety lasting a few hours to a few days.

Another one that’s relevant during Separate Tides, but also something that’s been clued at during the flashbacks during season 2B (specifically her misremembering things in Follies at the Coven Day Parade and in Edge of the World and somehow twisting them into something worse than what happened... something that usually happens when you’ve been overthinking and panicking about something for an extended period of time).

Inappropriate, intense or uncontrollable anger—often followed by shame and guilt.

This is something that we’ve only really seen twice in the show, the first time directed towards Lilith during Young Blood, Old Souls, and the second time just this last episode directed towards Eda (and then the coven scouts).

We don’t see Luz get angry often, but when we do it tends to be very explosive and intense and, in all honesty, throw her judgement completely out of wack (eg: intentionally getting herself arrested, attacking Eda).

And while the following are hard to prove without really getting to deep dive into Luz’s thoughts, they definitely feel like they could be relevant.

Unstable personal relationships that alternate between idealization (“I’m so in love!”) and devaluation (“I hate her”). This is also sometimes known as "splitting."

This one I wasn't sure if Luz experienced (you don’t need to have all of these symptoms to have BPD, only 5 out of the 9 total) but the way she flipped on Eda due to Eda’s perceived betrayal and then flipped back so rapidly when things got hairy during O Titan, Where Art Thou has me reconsidering.

This one can be pretty easy to mask if you aren’t broadcasting the changes so it’s a little harder to track.

Chronic feelings of boredom or emptiness.

This one I can’t think of any particular moment that’s shown that confirms Luz experiences this, however (getting personal for a second) this is one of my symptoms and I tend to try to deal with the inner emptiness feeling by trying to help other people with their problems, something that Luz does constantly while blatantly ignoring her own problems (basically the entire premise of Reaching Out).

Dissociative feelings—disconnecting from your thoughts or sense of identity or “out of body” type of feelings—and stress-related paranoid thoughts. Severe cases of stress can also lead to brief psychotic episodes.

Again, can’t really prove that Luz is dissociating during these scenes but Luz does tend to shut down and/or develop the thousand-yard-stare directly after experiencing some sort of trauma (the final scene of Agony of a Witch, most of her scenes in Reaching Out after talking to Amity about her father, the end of Hollow Mind/start of Edge of the World when she’s trying to process what happened in Belos’ mind).

It would also make a lot of sense why Luz has started to experience symptoms more and more throughout Season 2. Firstly because she’s been in a lot more situations that would trigger her BPD lately, but also because at 14 she’s right at the age where symptoms can start manifesting.

And honestly, I really love the idea of Luz having BPD because she’s such a great representation of what living with BPD is like for me and (most importantly) would be wonderful rep because for once it would mean seeing someone with BPD portrayed in media without them just being an angry, abusive narcissist like most shows would do... she’s not villainized for her symptoms, only held accountable and helped through it and that’s groundbreaking with the way BPD is seen currently.

#The Owl House #The Owl House Spoilers #TOH Analysis #Luz Noceda #This took like two hours to put together #But it was worth it

[blackjewles]

Love and midnight walks

Just a drabble of the thoughts of Kaminari ans Shinsou while they share a special moment.

Cw: no warnings apply

summary: Shinsou and Kaminari meet up late at night by chance, during a wordless walk they both consistently think about how much they like eachother. Kaminari wants to confess but can’t bring himself too, but, he confessed that he cares about him. And somehow, Shinsou too confesses that he cares. And for now, that’s better than anything they’ve ever experienced with eachother before .

—-

7:21, about an hour after the sun retired is position for the night, instead, being replaced with the moon. It was a clear night, the starry light lit up the paths just enough for any night wanders who dare leave their dorm for fresh air. The risk of being caught sneaking out at UA was expediential. Nobody dared challenged the rules, not even Katsuki Bakugou, who to some was known for living at his own pace.

However, two opposite boys found the night comforting, and dared challenge the ruthless punishments that would await them if caught.

Those two boys where Shinsou Hitoshi and Denki Kaminari. They where total opposites, mot only in aesthetics departments, but personality wise too.

However, as the age old saying goes, opposites attract.

After relentless determination from Kaminari, he managed to break down the purple headed boys wall of intorvertness and wedge himself into Shinsou’s life. Admittedly, Shinsou was scared at first, his whole life people had never liked him. Sure, he’d had his fair share of “friends” but most of those where just classmates who didn’t hate him for his quirk. But for the first time in his life, Shinsou had a real friend. And to his demise, he’d discovered that his feelings extended a lot more than just friendly ones. Which was the most terrifying but wonderful experience in the world. Being a stoic being with all these sudden nervous feelings was overwhelming, but in a way, exciting.

Kaminari had many friends, he was an outgoing and friendly guy. Everyone found company in his jokes. Each day he walked in and brightened the classroom with his laughs and smiles. Though Kaminari was nice to almost everyone, he found special interest in Shinsou. He’d stare for just a little bit longer, he’d think about his small and deep giggles late at night, and he’d imagine what it be like to date him. Kaminari knew what was happening to him, he knew quite well. He’d had many crushes before, and he knew now that he had fallen into a hole of uncontrollable emotions that yearned for the lilac headed boy. He was screwed, but he let it happen, deep down he believed each crush he had was fate. Weather it turned into somthing or not, he let these teenage feelings happen.

And so, two similarities they shared. They where both screwed, and in love.

But they shared another similarity: Insomnia.

Kaminari is quite literally a ball of energy, and with so much electricity building up inside him all the time, a full nights sleep was a rare thing.

Shinsou on the other hand had insomnia since he was in middle school, and so, a full nights sleep was also rare.

So what happenes when you combine two insomniac boys in love?

Way. Too. Many. Feelings.

—-

Rhythmic tapping of their own footsteps was all that was heard from both boys point of views. Neither bothered with music, the sounds of the night was comforting to both of them. Plus, if you’re not aware of your surroundings while on a late night walk, you can get in big trouble. Not only with teachers, but with villans too.

Shinsou liked to stare at his feet, while Kaminari stared into the sky. But they both kept listening to every sound around them. The owls, the wind, and most importantly, anyone else’s footsteps. So when Shinsou picked up on footsteps that wernt his own, he stopped directly in his tracks and immediately looked up.

Adrenaline pumped through his veins, getting caught outside at night is a death wish. But luckily, the figure that emerged form the darkness was not a teacher, but rather a boy. One that Shinsou thought about way too much.

“Shinsou?” The blond said gently. Shinsou had heard Kaminari call his name many times before, but this was different. He was calm, almost like the blurriness of a dream was coating his voice.

“Kaminari?” Shinsou called back. Kaminari took in a very slow breath, slowly tapping out of a meditative state he had been in. The nights always dark, but the moon lit up Shinsous face just enough to show his bewildered expression that was somehow, extremely beautiful. The blond made sure to ingrave this image of Shinsou in the moonlight into his mind. He didn’t wanna ever let it go.

“What are you doing out here?” Shinsou then asked, approaching Kaminari.

“I could ask you the same” Kaminari replied with a grin. Both boys let out small laughs.

Shinsou pondered his next move carefully, walking with someone could get him caught easier, but, it could also provide more protection. And, admittedly, he wanted to be with Kaminari.

“Do you... wanna walk with me?” Shinsou then asked Kaminari. Kaminari looked up, and smiled softly.

“Yeah, I would.” He replied. Kaminari then turned around and signaled Shinsou to follow.

Both boys where nervous, and for reasons beyond their adolescent understanding. But they both knew that being alone with eachother made them exponentially nervous.

Walking down the path little words where exchanged, their breathing and footsteps where the only sounds heard. Shinsou had never seen this side of Kaminari before, he was calm and a different type of beautiful.

Kaminari was only barley visible through Shinsous perifrial, but because his hair being up so high, looking over at him periodically wasn’t all that hard.

He studied every feature of the blond hard. Taking notes of every single detail. The way his cheekbones where illuminated by the dim light, his yellow eyes watching the sky with such concentration, the way his lips where placed on his face with such godly persision. Shinsou wanted to look at him forever, his heart thumped consideredly harder while being alone with him. The feeling was almost like the electricity the boy beside him held was flowing through him even though they weren’t touching. He was utterly entranced, experiencing a kind of romantic admiration that provided no real thoughts. No words came to mind, it was a hazey fog of whispers that yearned for the boy beside him. Shinsou did know one thing though, in that moment, he wanted nothing more than to kiss the boy beside him.

Kaminari, on the other hand, was trying extremely hard NOT to stare. His mind raced with thoughts he couldn’t control, so he focused on the stars that dotted the sky instead. But alas, the thoughts wouldn’t stop. It was a battle with his mind to not think about how much he’d like to take Shinsous hand and confess right there right now. But not making expressions mirroring his thoughts was even harder. There was a tornado of anxiety flowing through him, swiviling inside his chest. He took a deep breath, and looked to his left. Then, he locked eyes with Shinsou.

Shinsou looked away quickly, desperately fighting off any flustered expression that was clawing at his nerves and trying to show itself.

Kaminari on the other hand was hit with a rather sudden thought.

He was looking at me

Kaminari just about ran off then and there. Being alone with Shinsou and suddenly locking eyes like that was, well, very exciting. So exciting he could run laps. Kaminari knew he was overthinking things, but he let himself feel foolish for a while. He locked eyes with the stars again and mentally told them how he felt, and how he needed guidance for what to do in this precarious situation. He had to do something, say something. He begged the sky to tell him.

“Confess” He thought. He’d been thinking that way to much tonight. But He couldn’t, he’d ruin everything he’d built up with Shinsou, telling him he was in love with him would surely scare him away! But he wanted to tell him. So bad. He wanted to finally tell him how he felt and stop this crush. He thought of his feelings like a flame with opposite mechanics. Usually, when you put a flame under pressure it’ll go out. But with love, when you put the flame under pressure (aka bottle it up) it only wants to escape more. Right now, that flame of Kaminaris was enlarging, and dangerously close to escaping.

Shinsou on the other hand was drowning in a goey pit of embarrassment. Overthinking every moment with Kaminari was a habit at his, and he *knew* that this would come back and haunt him late at night. He felt foolish to have let Kaminari catch him staring, he was making it obvious wasn’t he? Shinsou wanted to run away from this entire situation. If it was up to him, he would’ve ran off the minute he saw anyone late at night. But of course, Shinsou just had to ask Kaminari to walk with him. He was starting to regret this decision.

“Hey Shinsou...” Kaminari suddenly said. Shinsou looked back up at him, mentally preparing for Kaminari to call him out for staring.

However, what followed was much more unexpected.

“Do you... Like anyone? Like have a crush on them?” Kaminari asked. Shinsou inhaled quickly, and looked away. Shit, what was he supposed to say?

Kaminaris heart raced way to fast. Part of him wanted Shinsou to say “nobody” or name sombody, that way he wouldn’t have to worry anymore. Sure, it would hurt, but this pining was beginning to get to much. Sure, hed be estatic if Shinsou said his name, or said he liked him, but he knew it wouldn’t happen. Shinsou was out of his league, it was impossible for him to like him back. Right?

“I... I dont know.” Shinsou replied. Stupid, you can do better than that! Shinsou thought.

Kaminari simply said “Oh.” and looked back forward. It wasn’t any of the answers he wanted, this way he couldn’t decifer if Shinsou liked anyone.

They kept walking silently, feeling the burden of their words weighing on their shoulders. Burdens they self created.

After torturous minutes of silence, the 1-A dorm finally came into view.

“I should probably go to bed now... huh...” Kaminari said, but he knew somthing was bothering him. He didn’t want to leave, not yet, he need something more.

“Goodnight.” Shinsou said solemnly, looking down at his shoes. Their walk had ended, and frankly, Shinsou didn’t think there was anything else to say. They’d see eachother tommorow and Kaminari would be back to his happy go lucky self and they wouldn’t have to be alone anymore.

Kaminari on the other hand, wasn’t done yet. He didn’t want to confess, not yet, but he could say somthing.

“Shinsou.”

Shinsou looked up and Kaminari smiled brightly at him.

“I want you to know that I...” Kaminari took ina. deep breath. “I care about you, so take care of yourself alright? You get some sleep too, you always look better when you show your body some love.”

“Insomnia doesn’t exactly let me do that, you know.” Shinsou replied. It was miraculous that he could even speak in that moment, Kaminari had just admitted to caring about him. Of all people, Denki Kaminari cared about him.

“I know, but try for me, okay?” Kaminari said softly, his smile falling into one much softer and his eyes sparkling with admiration and compassion.

Shinsou just about melted right then and there. Somehow though, he smiled back.

“I care about you too, Kaminari”

And with that, both boys said goodnight and went back to their dorms. Shinsou had to walk back to the class 1-C dorm, but they shared one thing for the rest of the night. They thought about what had just been said with stupid grins and rosey cheeks for as long as they could.

Caring isn’t the same as love or like, they both knew that, but neither could help but freak out and replay it over and over.

They where just two idiot insomniacs in love, and no matter how terrifying the feelings where, it was the most rewarding thing to finally hear the other say that they cared.

—- end

(YAY!! This took like a week because of procrastination,,, and i used a lot of conjunctions to start sentences... If that bothers you, i am sorry. but ANYWAYS, i REALLY hope you enjoyed reading this as much as i loved writing it. THANK YOU FOR READING!!)

#bnha #mha #denki kaminari #hitoshi shinsou #shinkami #shindenki #kamishin

[rhomsfanfic]

BnHA Vampire!AU

Here we go guys, with my own take on a Vampire!AU!!

Feel free to use for your own art/writing, but please link back to this post or @ me because I would love to see what you do with it and also for the original idea

It’s long, so click read more if you are interested! Also, frequent blood mentioning if you guys are sensitive to it, you might not want to read this!

Shouta Aizawa is still a relatively young but because of his human age and incredible body control, already a fully-grown vampire. Used to be a professor at an elite school before getting turned by Hizashi after being involved in a freak accident. Has never believed in the supernatural and even after his turning, refuses to see himself as a vampire. He does not like drinking blood, eventually starving himself for a long time - resulting in dark bags under his eyes and sometimes passing out from hunger - however, he does realize fully that it’s something he has to drink to survive and rather chooses to starve until the very last bit of his sanity vanishes. Is incredibly strict and grumpy, but makes for an amazing teacher if he’s willing. Even after decades being a vampire, he’s still the one that tries the most to go back to his human roots, only ever meeting rejection. He spends his nights reading if he can, always having dry eyes because the mansion is so dark and candles do not suffice as a light source for all the reading he does. If he isn’t reading, he’s most likely outside of the mansion, trying to find new books. The new life bores him extremely, which is why he urges for new knowledge

Hizashi Yamada is the third oldest of the adult vampires, differencing himself in how flashy he is. He wears colors that absolutely stand out even at night and he loves it when people point it out to him, only reassuring him in his choice of clothes. He makes the creature of the night name proud, always up to some form of shenanigans. Hizashi is the most likely to bring “fodder” into the mansion, having his fun before letting someone dispose of the body before he/she wakes up in the mansion the next morning. He can be found in night clubs and opium holes during the night, passed out in his room in the morning. Had absolutely no problem with becoming a vampire and even though he doesn’t hunt for fun - he won’t bite someone if it isn’t absolutely necessary -, is the most seductive and efficient of them all concerning humans. Incredibly loud and annoying but also a good teacher to the young vampires for everything concerning vampire-lessons. Used to be infatuated with Shouta when he was still a human because he was so serious and no fun, eventually turning him into a vampire when he got fatally wounded. He’s almost a century older than Shouta so he claims to not remember his life as a human, hiding the deep scars it left on him with his obnoxious personality

Toshinori Yagi is second oldest of the mansion and next to Lady Midnight the patriarch of the young vampires. Probably the calmest, modest and honest of all of them, even though he keeps secrets from not only the students but also the two adult vampires under him. He just doesn’t see the necessity to tell them certain things that are more than harmful to their living alongside humans, keeping these secrets to himself. Used to be a soldier, centuries ago. Fell in a war, but got resurrected accidentally by a vampire who used to feed off the dead. Got taken under the wing of said vampire and taught all the necessities by them. Follows their teachings to the point but also has since refrained from their old practice of feeding off the death out of his own morals. After living for so long, he still carries great empathy for humans and is the most sorry for drinking blood, but after the long time of being a vampire, he can’t be bothered with starving himself anymore. Spends most of his time teaching the little bats how to be a good vampire and life alongside humans and is the only one who can go outside by day if necessary - though he will eventually start coughing blood and die if he’s out too long - due to the fact that he can transform in a more humanly form at day, looking like an old, weak man, instead of a build soldier as he does by night. Only one to also advise drinking animal blood if there is no other option but staying undercover

Nemuri Kayama - or how she wants to be called: Lady Midnight - is the oldest vampire of the pack, the lady of the house, matriarch to everyone joining them and most of the ones that were turned into vampires, and first teacher to them all. She has lived so long. So incredibly long. Think about a long time, now think longer. Do never ask her for her age or your dead. After being a very primal and instinctive vampire for centuries, she eventually got back in touch with her human roots and chose to live alongside humans as peaceful as possible, giving up her monstrosities of behavior after that long time. She formed one of the few clans of vampires that do not choose the being superior to humans and is one of the main threats to them. Used to be something like royalty as a human and even after all the years still has the same graceful but suppressing aura as she had then. Though it’s only half of her, as sometimes her beastly behavior still shows in the way she talks and relentless she is in her thinking. Could go years without drinking blood without any consequences to her sanity, but drinks it for pleasure. No matter how much she puts into living peacefully next to humans, they still mostly are fodder for her. She is well-respected in human society and attends social events by night or teaches her ways to the little bats. Otherwise, one can find her in high-end clubs or in the mansion’s saloon, where she’ll gladly talk about stories she experienced or heard for hours. Very interesting and also sleep-inducing. Had a word in Shouta’s turning and though she didn’t turn him herself, is still considered to be his matriarch due to the fact she is Hizashi’s. Even though she is the oldest and highest ranking member of the pack, she still gave rights to Toshinori that enables him to have the same place in the hierarchy as her. They never fight and are very much in correspondence with each other, however, their main point in difference is their view on humans and it comes to fragile tension every now and then between them

Izuku Midoriya was a young student in the city’s university, always incredibly curious about the supernatural and considered a little odd for his fanatical researches. However, except for being dedicated to his researches, he was naive at the same time, running right into the vampire’s lair and witnessing something he shouldn’t have. Was turned by Toshinori as a precaution, even though the vampire felt very sorry for young Izuku to have to go through that process and the tragedy that comes with being of the supernatural kind. Relatively quickly adjusted to being a vampire, however, struggles with having to drink blood and his own hunger a lot. Is in a constant fight over his own desires and morals and has a hard time getting used to it like the other students. Very curious about vampires still after becoming one himself and spends most of his time learning more about it, next to being taught by the elders

Katsuki Bakugou was yet again another student curious about the supernatural, though not to the extent of Izuku. Comes from a more prestige family and loved making fun of Izuku for his interest, while keeping his own interest to himself, due to fearing that other people would find him odd too. Used to bully Izuku a lot and when he heard about the other boy going to inspect a so-called vampire lair, he made it his purpose to spook Izuku and make fun of him. Got unwillingly pulled into the whole disaster they had to witness and turned by Toshinori too so they wouldn’t tell on the vampires. After the transformation he’s even more aggressive towards Izuku, blaming him for the procedure they had to go through, though he finds his new strength and power quite alluring. Lady Midnight fears he’s the most likely to fall into the category of vampire that would cause harm to humans just because he thinks he’s better than them, so he’s kept under close watch. Surprisingly, even though he has bad habits and swears like a sailor all the time, he is still pretty respectful towards Toshinori and Shouta. Even though he seems to have quite the superiority complex, he still learns what he’s told and much like Izuku is an example vampire for the clan

GENERAL INFORMATION FOLLOWING

Overall there are two differences in vampires, 1.) the ones that want to live next to humans and with them, accepting their thirst and do drink the blood, mostly hiding it behind sexual play or by biting people who will not cause a scene. They have an undergroup of vampires who drink exclusively from animals and/or the dead. And 2.) the ones that see themselves superior to humans, hunting and killing them with their bites just for the fun or satisfaction of their needs. They are more inhuman than number 1 and can barely stand walking through crowds of humans without attacking them. They also look more like monsters than vampires in disguise, with larger fangs and claw-like fingers, due to their constant consumption of blood and hunting habits. Vampires with a strong will can turn away from being a monstrosity and turn back into a more human-like appearance, still keeping up their inhuman speed and strength. Vampires of type 2 are still capable of conversing like humans and think logical, but are driven by their instincts more and have less reasoning to hold back or overthink situations

Vampires can go a long time without drinking blood, but with every day they starve they lose a bit of sanity and could turn back into their inhuman form at any point. They only die when exposed to the sun too long - lurking in the shadows is an option - and/or are stabbed by a silver knife/hit by a silver bullet. Vampires and other supernatural beings are the only species capable of murdering another vampire with brute force, but it’s not common practice

Vampire bites do not kill - per se. They leave the characteristic marks on the victim's body but No. 1 Vampires do not drink enough to kill the victim or let them bleed out either, their salvia can close up the wounds. They are most likely to get their victim to faint before placing them back somewhere near the village where they can be found. The marks are quite troublesome as they signalizing a vampire’s presence, so they do their best to bite somewhere, where it won’t be noticed too much later on. No. 2 Vampire’s however, kill their victims by ripping out either limbs or biting through their throats which will leave the victim dying. Ultimately a way more efficient method of hiding their presence, but also much crueler and deathly.

Vampire can eat and drink whatever they want, but will be faced with tummy aches and other medical conditions if they overdo it. Some of the main cast prefers human drinks over blood, though it gives them nothing. Lady Midnight likes the taste of red wine, but can never get drunk. Shouta likes coffee but will not get a caffeine rush from it. They simply won’t gain any negative or positive effects of it, and their bodies cannot change except if they have a high intake of blood, since that will trigger the poison in their own blood to rise and turn them into the monster they are if not controlled by their will

Turning does not happen via biting someone, but through intake of the vampire’s DNA. Most efficient are nails or hair, also in form of powder in a drink. But saliva will do just as much, it just takes a whole lot of it to be intaken by the victim to be turned. It is not possible for a human to become a vampire by having sex with them, though the species cannot impregnate each other either. Vampires cannot have children and it’s uncommon to turn a child into a vampire as that is what it will be for the rest of its life. However - though very rare - a human can possibly be turned if a vampire were to lick a very deep wound of them, the vampire’s salvia having a chance to get into the body enough to let out the poison of their being that would turn the human. Dead bodies cannot be turned anymore, as the poison simply cannot circulate through them anymore. The likelihood of a victim of No. 2 Vampires to survive and turn is small, but not impossible and more likely than them surviving.

The main goal of the vampire clan under Lady Midnight is the hiding of what they are, while also protecting the territory she managed to achieve. In the eyes of other vampires, she owns a big university city, the forests next to it and the mansion inside the forest and their mission is to protect the humans in her territory from mostly No. 2 Vampires but also No. 1 who dare to set foot into it. That’s why the clan has patrols every night and even in the day (thanks to Toshinori and eventually maybe some other characters depending on where the AU leads)

It is set in medieval times so yay for carriages, old clothes, and chaise lounges

#BnHA Vampire!AU #Vampire!AU #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha imagines #bnha headcanons #bnha scenarios #bnha fanfiction #bnha writing blog #mha #my hero academia #Aizawa Shouta #toshinori yagi #yagi #all might #midnight #present mic #nemuri kayama #hizashi yamada #bakugou #bakugou katsuki #midorya izuku #midorya #nemuri #hizashi

[justkending]

Knock, Knock. Part 28.

Chapter Summary: The parents may have not arrived yet, but someone maybe just as important did.

Pairing: (single) Jensen x Reader

Warnings: Cussing, Fluff (lots of it).

Word Count: 3900+

(NOT MY GIF)

Part 28:

“Your parents?” you asked in complete shock. “Oh my gosh! What time are they coming? When did they say- when did you know that they were coming? Oh my God, I need to clean! Oh and then we have to do-

“Y/N, calm down. It’ll be fine.” he said in a calming tone, but you tuned that out.

“I mean I was nervous to meet them as your roommate, but your girlfriend? That’s a whole other-

“Girlfriend?”

There was an awkward pause as you heard what you said.

“Oh god. I’m sorry. Did I-?” you motioned between the two of you. “Shit, I’m overthinking things. I probably just jumped the gun and now you think-! “ you laughed nervously. “Is it hot in here to you? I’m getting a little hot-“

You were broken off from your ramble session when Jensen’s lips cut you off. At first you were shocked by the kiss, but easily fell into it. Once he pulled away, you had closed your eyes and took a deep breath. You heard Jensen chuckle, and felt him place his hands on your face, and was brushing your cheek with his thumb.

Slowly you opened your eyes to see two big green ones looking deep into your Y/E/C eyes.

“Breath sweetheart.” he said softly. “Everything is going to be fine.”

You took a few more deep breaths before your shoulders eased some tension.

“Ok, ok. I’m good.” you sighed loudly still trying to steady your heart rate.

“Good. Listen, this-” he said motioning between you both like you had before. “This is good. This can have a label on it if you want. I would love that actually.” he smiled softly.

You looked up at him with a calmer smile, and a slight flush rising on your cheek.

“Really?”

“Are you kidding me? I get to call you my girlfriend!” he all but shouted in excitement. You giggled at his enthusiasm. He looked down at you with admirations cloaking his face. He reached up pushing a piece of hair out of your face and behind your ear. “That’s a dream come true if you ask me.”

“A dream come true for me too.” you smiled leaning into his touch. He grinned widely at your comment, and pulled you into a hug that brought your head into his chest as he comforted you. You took advantage of this position to wrap your arms around his waist and listen to his heart rate which was surprisingly regular.

“What do you say we watch that movie, and go ahead and order in. We can talk about my family coming over during that.”

“Ok, but Jensen-”

“Don’t overthink it. They are super laid back people, and will adore you. Promise.”

“Ok, ok… I guess I can use a cool down time.” you sighed pulling back and looking up at him. “Let me clean up this mess, and I’ll meet you downstairs.” you said looking at all the papers.

“Ok, I’ll go see what take out menus I have.” he said before placing a kiss on your forehead and walking to the door. “Craving anything specific?” he asked at the doorway.

“Surprise me.” you winked.

“Will do! I already have an idea for the movie too.” he winked back.

“Better be a classic!” you said moving to your bed.

He laughed as he walked out and you started on cleaning up your clutter of papers.

_

Jensen ended up ordering Pizza from one of your favorite places, and you both just opened the box on the coffee table skipping out on the plates.

He started a classic Marvel movie, and you both got comfortable cuddling and eating without a care in the world. It was around midnight, and the movie was about in the middle when you turned to Jensen.

He was just in the middle of taking a giant bite of the last of his piece, and you were just staring. He hadn’t noticed you looking until his mouth was completely full. He turned to you looking down at you wrapped under his arm.

“What?” he asked muffled by the food. “Do I have something on my face?” he joked.

You laughed at the goofy comment, and shook your head before cuddling more into his side.

“Nope, just like looking at yah.” you answered.

“I can say the same thing to you.” he said still with food in his mouth.

You grinned and laid your head on his chest at an angle while his arm snaked around your waist pulling you closer.

After a few more moments into the movie, you decided to ask the question that had been itching in the back of your head.

“Hey Jensen? Can we talk about something real fast?”

He moved to pause the movie and turned to where he could see you better.

“Sure, what's up?” he threw his crust into the box, and brushed off his hands as you changed positions as well to see him better.

“So, what happened upstairs…” you started fiddling with your hands. A nervous habit you picked up. “I didn’t mean for it to-”

“Say no more.” he said putting his hands up. “As much as I would have loved to take the next step, I can see where you would want to slow things down.”

A huge weight lifted off your shoulders.

“Really? It’s just that we went from being roommates straight to- well that. Not that I didn’t like it-”

“Oh, I definitely enjoyed it.” he said with a cheeky grin.

“Me too.” you giggled. “But I really do want to dive into this relationship more before we head straight for the physical stuff.” you said tucking your legs under you.

“And I’m perfectly fine with that.” Jensen smiled. “Most relationships I’ve had we didn’t take it one step at a time. Honestly, I think that may have been the fault in a majority with them.” he said more to himself. “But with you.... I want to take it slow. I want to get to know you even more before we get ‘there’, you know?”

You were gleaming. How did you get so lucky with such a gentleman? You sat there with the biggest, dorkiest, and most relieved grin plastered on your face.

“What? Did I say something-?” Jensen started since you hadn’t talked yet.

“Right? Did you say something right?” you interrupted. “Yes, you said all the right things. I want to get to know you more too before we go to the next level.”

He smiled and opened his arms up to where you gladly inserted yourself.

“Good to know we agree.” he said rubbing up and down your arms.

“Yeah, another thing.” you sighed.

“What’s that?” he asked sweetly.

“Your parents Jensen. What do I need to know? What time will they be here? Is there any topics I need to avoid? What about relatives? Will they be here?” With each question you found yourself pulling back and thinking more and more.

“Y/N/N-”

“Do I need to make dinner or lunch? Wait they’re coming in the morning? So brunch? Do they like brunch?” you continued.

“Y/N-”

“Shoot, I have to run some errands tomorrow too-”

“Y/N!” Jensen shouted causing you to shoot your head his direction. He could see the stress in your eyes. “Sweetheart. Why are you so worried? Has meeting the parents gone bad for you in the past or something?”

“You would be surprised…” you said rolling your eyes and slouching in defeat.

“Y/N, princess.” he said placing a hand on your shoulder and turning you to look at him. “If I thought my parents would not like you, I wouldn’t be so relaxed right now. I know for a fact they will love you. They are super accepting and normal people. Just act like you do around me and you’ll be fine.”

“You’re sure?”

“Yes, and whoever’s parents didn’t like you before, were complete dicks. They didn’t know what they were missing out on.” he smiled.

“You really know how to make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside, don’t you?” He shrugged his shoulders with a coy smirk on his face. “Ok, just for my own mental health, let me know the big facts. I need some form of conversation starters, and details on them.”

“Ok, ok. Let’s see...”

__

You both got comfortable, and Jensen let you in on facts that you would need to know just to help conversation flow easily. You spent the next hour going over things, and slowly you felt your eyes getting heavy.

“Ok Y/N/N. I think it’s time for bed. We’ve had a long day filled with travel, press, and secret emotions being shared.” he said kissing you on the forehead and nudging you gently from where you said you were ‘just resting your eyes’. “Let’s get you upstairs.”

“Hmmm…” you groaned.

“Come on babe, or else I’m going to have to carry you up there.”

“I’m not opposed to that.” you mumbled furrowing into the couch more.

“Ok, you asked for it.” not even two seconds after he said that, he picked you up and threw you over his shoulder.

“Jensen!” you shouted, but mainly laughed.

“You asked for it. I’m just delivering.” he said marching to the stairway.

“You don’t have to do this.” you said wiggling in his arms.

“You’re tired. For all I know, you could collapse on the stairs from exhaustion.” he said simply as he made his way up carrying you like you weighed nothing. “I couldn’t let that happen now could I?”

You just laughed as you rested on his shoulder. Next thing you knew, he was stopped in the middle of the hallway right before your room.

“What’s with the hold up? Traffic?” you joked.

“Where- um- Where do you want to sleep?” he said quietly. Nerves clear in his voice.

You hadn’t really thought about it. I mean you just assumed you would sleep in your room, but would that be weird now?

“Well, um... “ you started not sure where you were headed with your answer.

“I mean you can sleep in my room if you want. No funny business, I promise.” he said with you still thrown over his shoulder.

“Lead the way Ackles.” you said without hesitation.

“Really?” he asked shifting his stance.

“I wouldn’t mind a cuddle buddy. Beats sleeping alone.” you shrugged not bothered by it.

He repositioned you to where he had a better grip.

“Don’t have to ask me twice!” he said marching to his room.

Once he opened the door and sat you down, you adjusted your shirt that had rode up. You looked around the room, and were kinda surprised by it.

It was painted in a simple light grey, and had a modern vibe to it all. The bed had a giant white comforter with a navy blue throw over it. There was a single accent wall the was all brick, and was opposite of the wall of windows that showed the lake view you had. He had a desk area on the brick wall, and a connected master bath that was on the wall lined with the bed. He had simple decorations here and there to make it more homey, and antique 70’s/ 80’s rock band paintings on parts of walls.

“You know? I don’t think I’ve ever actually been or seen inside your room.” you said looking around.

“What do you think?” he asked walking in and going to the dresser that had a huge flat screen hanging above it.

“It’s simple. I like it.” you said walking around as you took it all in. “The paintings are definitely my kinda thing.”

“I figured you would like those.” he chuckled as he pulled out a t-shirt. “I’m going to change then we can clock out for the night. Sound like a plan?”

You snapped out of your daze of studying the room and looked back over at him.

“Um, yeah. I’m actually going to switch into something else. I’ll be right back.”

He nodded and you headed to your room to switch into some sleep shorts. You could never sleep in leggings. Hell, most of the time you would sleep in a sports bra and underwear, but considering the sleeping arrangement, it would be smarter to put on a few more layers. Before heading back you decided you should probably brush your teeth and everything before too.

When you walked back in, Jensen was coming back in from his bathroom. He was wearing boxers and a white t-shirt, that somehow looked more attractive than a tux would. Not that he wouldn’t look amazing in a tux, but damn. This man could pull off anything.

While you were looking him up and down, he was doing the same to you. He took in how short your shorts were, and how hot you looked. You were dressed comfortable, but somehow managed to look flawless in every sense.

You broke both of your train of thoughts when you cleared your throat, and motioned to the bed.

“Is there a specific side you like, or-?”

“Um, no. No. Pick either one. I tend to just sleep in the middle most of the time.” he said rubbing the back of his neck.

“Oh, ok.”

There was defiant awkward tension in the room. Sure you guys were comfortable with each other for the most part, but this was a whole different scenario than what you were use to.

“You know.” you said climbing in the right side of the bed. “It’s not like we haven’t shared a bed before.” you said in an attempt to ease the tension.

“Right, right.” Jensen agreed climbing into the other side.

“We literally have been sleeping in the same bed for the past two nights. What’s the difference now?” you laughed nervously as you adjusted. “Holy hell, this bed is comfortable.” you interrupted yourself.

Jensen laughed at your distracted self, and calmed down a little.

“I think we’re thinking too much into it.” he said making you look over to him. “Only thing is, this time around I can do this-” he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close into him. “And not think twice about it.”

“Hmmm.” you hummed getting comfortable in the closeness of your bodies. “This I can get use to.”

He was spooning you to where your back was against his chest, and head was tucked by his shoulder. The classic cuddle position. You let out long yawn.

“Tired.”

“Exhausted.”

“Well go to sleep sweetheart, and don’t worry about an alarm. I have one set. My parents aren’t even coming in ‘till eleven, so we can sleep in too.” he hummed as he snuggled into the nook of your neck.

“Perfect.” you whispered as you felt sleep already taking over.

“Night Y/N.”

“Night Jay.”

And with that. You both were out like lights.

__

You woke up the next morning tangled in the sheets, but feeling as regenerated as you possibly could have. The bed, plus Jensen, gave you the best night of sleep you had in a long time.

You moved your arm around to feel for Jensen, but it was empty and cold. You reluctantly sat up to scan the room, and found his side of the bed partially made. There was note on the pillow, and after rubbing your eyes to clear them up a little you finally were able to read it.

“I woke up a little early, so I decided on getting a head start on cleaning. You looked too peaceful to wake up even with kisses, so I decided to let you sleep in. I’ll be downstairs when you wake up.  xxx J”

You smiled at the sweet note and decided to go ahead and get ready for the day before heading downstairs. You ran to your room throwing on some jeans and a cute tank top you bought recently, and some sandals. You still needed to run some errands before Jensen’s parents came, so you figured might as well get dressed for the day just in case you came back and they were there.

As you walked over to the vanity to throw on some mascara and lip gloss, and you saw the mess your hair was in.

“Yikes. Thank God messy buns are socially acceptable.” you sighed as you threw it up in a twisted mess on your head, and pulled a few stray pieces out to frame your face. “Hmmm, not bad.” you said looking over your whole quick picked outfit.

You made your way down the stairs seeing the living room completely spotless, and heard things clattering in the kitchen.

As you turned into the kitchen, you saw Jensen’s back to you while he looked in the fridge. You snuck up behind him, and wrapped your arms around his torso surprising him.

He barely jumped almost as if he saw it coming.

“Hey, hot stuff.” you smiled into his back. “Whatcha up to?”

You could feel his deep chuckle flow through his body since your ear was pressed to his back.

“Just going through what we have to eat. What about you ‘hot stuff’?” he retorted spinning to where he was now facing you and wrapping his own arms around you.

You looked up to him, and couldn’t help the smile that formed.

“I’m about to go run some errands. One including groceries.” you said looking over his shoulder at the basically empty fridge.

“I can go with you if you want. I’m basically done cleaning.”

You pulled away from his arms and walked to the coffee machine making a quick to-go mug. His eyes following your every move. Once you were on the opposite side of the island that was now separating you two, he leaned over it with his elbows and watched as you made the caffeine boost.

“Nah, it’s fine. I might be a while, and someone needs to be here when your parents show up.” you reasoned.

“How long do you think you’ll be out?” he said checking out your ass.

“No longer than 11. I’m hoping to get back before they do, but it not then only a few minutes after they come.” you explained as you turned back around, and gave him a cheeky smile, and leaned on the counter across from him. “Were you checking me out?”

“I-I wasn’t-” you gave him a raised eyebrow. “How did you know?”

“It’s a sixth sense I’ve picked up over the years. Girls gotta know what’s going on in her surroundings.” you said turning to the fridge and opening it to grab some creamer. “What exactly do we need food wise? I know we need to get some-”

You were interrupted by the garage door opening and shutting while a female's voice filled the room.

“Jensen? Jensen, you home?”

You turned to Jensen confusion written all over your face while he was just staring waiting for the person to appear from around the corner.

“Who-” you started, but before you could finish a girl came around the corner. She had blonde hair with green eyes, and was shorter. Her outfit was just a simple blouse and jeans with some short ankle boots.

“Jensen! There you are!” she smiled running over to him, and throwing her arms around his neck.

“Mackenzie? What-What are you doing here?” Jensen asked confused, but returned the hug nonetheless.

“What? A girl can’t visit her hot shot star brother?” she sassed pulling back.

Mackenzie? Oh… Sister… That makes sense now.

“I mean you can, it’s just mom and dad said you weren’t coming.”

“Yeah at first, but plans dropped. Josh still isn’t coming though.”

“Yeah, he called and explained everything to me. Guess his in-laws have something else going down.”

“Oh, and who’s this?” Mackenzie said turning to you.

“Hi, I’m Y/N.” you said walking around the counter and putting your hand out for a handshake. “I’m Jensen’s-”

“Are you the one I was seeing all in the news?” she said not taking your hand yet.

“Well-”

“Y/N’s my girlfriend, and we are keeping things under wraps for right now. We don’t want word to get out to the press quite yet that we’re together.” Jensen jumped in to save you.

“Oh, I see.” she said looking back from her brother to you whose hand had slightly fallen. “In that case,” she pulled your hand up and gave it a firm handshake. “It’s nice to meet you Y/N. I’m Mackenzie. Jensen’s younger sister.”

“Nice to meet you Mackenzie!” you said returning the firm handshake. “Jensen was catching me up on the family last night, and told me a few things about you.”

“Really. Hopefully nothing too embarrassing.” she said turning to her brother and crossing her arms.

He started to shrug and open his mouth when you cut him off.

“He wouldn’t really be an older brother if he didn’t now would he?” you smiled.

She laughed and returned the smile.

“I guess you’re not wrong about that.” she said rolling her eyes as she saw Jensen blush. “Listen, I know I’m early and mom and dad aren’t getting here for a few more hours, so is there anything I can do to help?” she asked.

“I cleaned most everything. I don’t think-” Jensen started.

“I’m actually about to go run some errands in the city, and maybe go grocery shopping if you want to come with me.” you offered. “I mean we probably need to cook, and we have little to no food. I’m sure you could help me pick out a meal for them.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to impose on your plans.”

“Nonsense.” you said waving her off and grabbing your purse and coffee mug. “Plus, I wouldn’t mind a little girl talk as I shop for a few school things. Of course, only if you’re comfortable with that. You don’t have to come it you don’t want-”

“I would love to. Gives me a chance to learn about the women who stole my brothers heart.”

Jensen had been watching the whole conversation from the side with a smile seeing how well you two were getting along. Then he heard the heart stealing bit and snapped out of his trance.

“I-I heart-heart- That’s not. May-maybe- We-we just-”

“I think you broke him.” you teased leaning over to his sister as you both looked at him.

She laughed and nodded in agreement.

“It’s just a joke Jens. Calm down dude.” you said walking over and standing on your tiptoe to kiss his cheek before heading out. “We’ll be back soon. Text us if we need to grab something while we’re out.” you shouted as you headed to the car.

Mackenzie was close behind, but before she was walking into the garage, she turned back to her brother who was completely flushed and frozen.

“I like her. She makes you sound like a broken record, and already has the teasing down.” Mackenzie winked at her brother.

“Get out of here!” Jensen said throwing a towel at her as she giggled running to meet back with you. “Dork.” he chuckled under his breath.

He was impressed to say the least. Mackenzie wasn’t even here for 5 minutes, and you somehow managed to make it seem like you both had known each other your whole life. Now he knew for sure nothing bad could go wrong. If Mackenzie liked you, mom and dad would love you in a heartbeat.

Tags:

@shamelesslydean @sleepless-sin @unabashedsoul97 @sandlee44 @gripmetight-raisemefromperdition @cabbagewithissues @supersleepygoat @anotherwaywardsister@anotherwaywardsister @spnwoman@ravengirl94 @carryonmywaywardcaptain @ezilyamuzed@thosekidswhohuntmonsters@purpleskiesandcherrypies @anise-d-castle6 @adoptdontshoppets @casper57x @tailsoflightning@spookycowz @eve05glee @snffbeebee @angelessquirrel@mirandaaustin93 @natura1phenomenon@tftumblin @gh0stgurl @screechingartisancashbailiff@kersumgen @herscrunchiehairtie@dreaminemz @staradorned @pretty-fortune

#supernatural series #supernatural #jensen x reader #jensen ackles x reader #Jensen Ackles #jensen ackles x y/n #jensen ackles series #justkending #knock knock

[drmatchupmode]

Matchup

Hi! I’m a 5'6" girl who doesn’t mind either gender and is a bit of a mosh pit of everything. I seem more motherly to others and don’t take care of myself much but am a ball of energy. I’ll do anything to make someone I care about smile and I’m a bit of a cuddle bug. I’m a giant nerd who loves marvel and JRPGs and will listen to any type of music! I love puzzles of any kind or just anything that challenges my mind and I draw a lot. I have a bad habit of holding emotions in and never sharing them but I do draw them out on paper to vent. I overthink about a lot and stress myself out though. Hopefully that was enough haha.

I just wanted to say that i’ve seen you like a lot of the stuff I post and I just want to say tysm despite this blog sorta being dead lkjslfhsdjlshd

And your match is...

Shuichi Saihara!!!

You and Shuichi complement each other quite well. Your motherly personality might be beneficial for someone like Shuichi, who is very shy and lacks self-confidence. For him to thrive, he needs a reaffirming presence, someone who supports and believes in him, so a motherly figure like yourself would prove to be quite good for him. He is also one to get depressed, so your habit of making others smile would definitely have a positive impact on him. You also complement each other in terms of your energy levels, whereas you are very energetic, Shuichi is very calm and quiet. In this case Shuichi could help you to not get carried away by your energy while you could help Shuichi with being more proactive and loosening up. You and Shuichi both enjoy stimulating your minds, most commonly through things like puzzles, or in Shuichi’s case detective work. Not only could you bond through this, but this also proves that you are intellectually compatible as well. Because Shuichi is very observant and perceptive, I'd think he’d be able to pick up on small signs that are indicative of when you are repressing your emotions, as well as when you are stressed (even if he shares being an overthinker with you), which could probe you to express your feelings to him, but even if it doesn’t, Shuichi would know whether to comfort you or not, albeit through more subtle ways. He could also come to notice whether you are neglecting your needs or not, and remind you to take care of yourself. Most likely, considering how analytical and smart he is, he’d even come to know what emotions your drawings are expressing. Overall, you due to your contrasts but also your similarities, you two would come to forge a deep bond and grow as people.

Headcannons:

Can I just say, most analytical, inquisitive couple ever, srsly you two combined possess like 110% brainpower

At first glance, people don’t really get how you guys get along, Shuichi being so calm and you so energetic, but at the same time you seem to have this mutual understanding that people envy

Many of your interactions are you talking about all different kinds of stuff while Shuichi calmly listens to you and adds in a comment or two, but despite that, you guys manage to work so well together

Shuichi is NOT PREPARED for those cuddles, he’ll become a blushing and stuttering mess that only makes him more adorable and cuddly in your eyes, it’s a never-ending cycle

Bro, you know that Shuichi would love JRPG’s as well, one moment he knows nothing about them, next thing you know he’ll be lining up outside the game store during the midnight releases 

Two words: PUZZLE NIGHTS

Srsly, many of your dates would be comprised of you guys putting together puzzles

Other date ideas: reading novels together, escape rooms, watching mystery films/psychological thrillers, or just chatting up the hours away

Overtime with your help and support, Shuichi would become much more confident and sure of himself, and he is forever grateful for that

Seriously, you are very inspiring to him. He admires how you manage to cheer others up, it’s an ability he himself wishes he had.

He thinks you are such a good person, always taking care of others and making others smile

He feels a bit bad that sometimes you have to comfort him but you yourself overlook your own needs at times, so he is always reminding you how you need to take care of yourself, as you are already doing much for others

The only way Shuichi feels he can really show his gratitude towards you is by helping you with your own problems. For that he is always paying attention if you are showing signs of emotional distress

He might not approach you head-on about your problems, but, for example, if he notices you are anxious, you’ll notice him become much softer and tender with you, and if you are feeling stressed, he’ll get you some of your favorite foods, drinks, etc.

He buys you different art materials for your drawings, that be either for you to draw whatever you like or for you to express your feelings

He’s generally a very thoughtful and doting boyfriend who tries to care of most of your needs

sorry I might’ve gotten INspired

Other matches: Ouma Kokichi, Mahiru Koizumi, Hajime Hinata, Chiaki Nanami

Hope you enjoyed the matchup! If you feel like you weren’t portrayed correctly/I misinterpreted your information let me know and I’ll make the corrections!

#regularmatchup #matchupmeter #submission

[brooklynislandgirl]

If you are still doing the ship meme... all the hearts for Beth and Foggy cause I need to know :)

Heart Eyes || Accepting

❤: who is more affectionate in public? in private?

Long suffering Foggy Nelson has been the victim of ambushing by hug or sudden hand-hold, by bright and bubbly enthusiasm over probably the weirdest things, kisses on the cheek, straightening of ties, thumbs up from around corners…the laundry list gets longer with every passing year they’ve known each other. And he wears her affection with a style and grace that’s rather unmatched by nearly anyone he could care to name.

And he returns those tokens with equal aplomb, albeit differently. Musicals watched at his apartment, a tour of the office while he was still working on it. Phone calls in the middle of the night to make sure she is first…okay, and that she doesn’t forget she actually has a home to go to.“Definitely me in public, him in personal space.”

♡: who is the bigger romantic openly? secretly?

She laughs and the sound radiates warmth and kindness through out it’s duration which is brief. Not because the question is funny but because Foggy is one of the sweetest and most romantic souls she knows, more so than she is, and that’s saying a lot.“Foggy’s romantic in da very French sense of da word. I mean if I had t’ pick someone oddah dan my braddah whom I could see ridin’ resolutely into battle wi’ a token around his arm from some kine maiden fair…I couldn’t pick anyone beddah. He carries a wonder of da world, a belief dat’s deep as oceans inside. He will champion a cause because it’s da right kine to do an’ nevah really t’ink twice, no matter how much he stand to lose, how hurt he could get, how he don’t see himself dat way.

“My favourite knights were always Sir Gawain an’ Sir Galahad….an’ if Foggy isn’t a distant relative of Lancelot, den I dunno who is. So I say….he’s da bigger romantic open like.”

❥: who is more likely to plan something big for valentine’s day?

“I hones’ly t’ink dat Foggy’s idea of Valentimes is him makin’ some kine ono for someone special ~man’s a fantastic cook when he’s got da time an patience for it, an’ he gonna shower you with all of his attention. Dat’s how he let ya know he cares, ya know? Lazy conversation, great little jokes, really lissen an’ rememberin’ small details.”She smiles.“Me…mebbe is cause how I was raise but I feel like… need t’ go real big or go home ya know? Carriage t’rew da park, rentin’ out da stadium for ‘battin’ practice an’ a picnic onna pitcher’s mound. Broadway show wi’ ya name in lights. Dat kind of t’ing.”ღ: who is more likely to initiate hand-holding in public?

They walk through the park, talking about his cases, even the smallest ones bringing a sense of pride and sense of self worth in it. And it starts with walking maybe too close, so that her hand brushes his and eventually she slips her fingers between his. She’s always had a thing about touch, it’s how she navigates the world and sometimes it just makes her feel a little less lonely, a lot safer. And maybe he doesn’t mind so much, because he lets her. Sometimes carrying on through with a conversation or lifting their conjoined hands to point something out that she might have otherwise missed.💕: who is more likely to make huge declarations of love in front of other people?

“Uh. Foggy.”

She remembers it all too clearly. How strange they all looked in Josie’s, Foggy and Karen and Misty and Beth herself. And she watched how he watched their long-legged and blonde friend. And Beth wondered what it would be like to be here for just a moment, though she was jerked out of that feeling when he slammed his palms on their pool table, and ordered another round of drinks.

‘These are my friends and I love them!’The only explanation he gave. Karen doesn’t know how lucky she is. Can’t see beyond Matt or Frank. But Foggy never gives up on people, and Beth admires that, even if she can see the marks it leaves behind. Even if she knows what those marks feel like. He walked Karen home that night, and she…left a picket fence of cocktail umbrellas for her cabbie.She never really had the guts to ask what, if anything, happened that night.💘: who developed a crush on the other first?“Oh, I dunno. We’re jus’…jus’ friends.”

She doesn’t know exactly when she noticed how he lights up a room with his smile. Or how she could spend hours listening to his opening and closing statements, or talking about how he grew up and what his favourite movies are. She doesn’t know why he risked life and limb to come to her clinic the night of the Earthquake. Or when she first traced the veins on the back of his hand and gave it a squeeze. She wouldn’t even really call it a crush so much as…she just likes being around him. She thinks he’s the best cuddler and a good friend and…💝: who spends more time (possibly overthinking) what presents to get the other?

“Me. Cufflinks. Wha’ was I even t’inking?! But a’ least he took it in stride.”💓: who initiates most physical contact?

It’s not exactly initiation, but Beth usually starts it. Whether it’s running her fingers through his hair at the end of a rough day, or letting him doze in her lap when he’s sick, or rubbing his shoulders during the middle of the night and he’s still burning midnight oil at his desk. It is the only real way she knows of telling him that she cares about him, his well being, and all the other things that go along with it. That and the hand holding. Or resting her head on his shoulders while they’re going through their Star Wars marathon.

“Some day, I’m gonna be really sad when I’ve got to force-choke him for being rebel scum dat he is.”💌: who is more likely to send cutesy texts to the other?

“I wouldn’t call dem cutesy, really. But sometimes it’s nice t’ get a random tex so ya know someone out dere tinkin’ about ya. An’ he ~said~ he liked cute animal videos, so reliably no can hold dat against me, jus’ sayin.”💟: who spends time reading their zodiac incompatibilities?

“No idea wha’ ya talkin’ about, incompatibilities. We’re both Cancers, born t’irteen days apart and a couple years, give or take, which means we bot’ got a lot in common if ya don’ count generational kine. An’ so wha’ if his venus is in his sixth… I mean I’m sure I could sit down an’ draw out his chart if I wan too but why? I don’ t’ink it maddah t’ him wha’ da stars say, because it’s slander and heresay, at best.”💙: who is more protective?

Beth absolutely believes Foggy is the more physically protective of the two of them, where as she’s more emotionally protective of him, and in a way it creates a really beautiful synergy. And it’s also extremely endearing though the idea that he could get hurt because of her absolutely kills her. “I say we’re pretty even matched here.”💚: who tends to get sick more often? who is better at taking care of the other?

Beth is convinced that he’s never noticed that she doesn’t get sick. Despite working in an emergency room and running a health clinic in the Kitchen. That whenever things go really side ways {or she spends time with people like Frank Castle}, she has the remarkable good luck not to come away with a single scratch. And she really hopes he doesn’t ever catch on because that is the one secret she can’t share with him.Likewise, Foggy’s worst habit is his lack of self-care and the fact that he’ll run himself into the ground if he’s allowed to. So of course she tries to make sure he doesn’t without seeming weird about it.

“I mean, I’m pretty sure I can say I’m mo’ beddah taking care of him, and oddah people, because dat’s ya know…what I do for a living. An’ I guess den dat makes him da one gets more sick.”💜: who said “i love you” first? or, if neither has said it yet, who is more likely to say it first?

“Objection!” She almost chokes on her cup of coffee at the question. Obviously flustered she seems to drop back behind her personal shell over the matter. Arms hunched inward and face turned away so her hair falls into it. Beth…can’t bring herself to say those words. Even if she meant them, even if they scratched at the back of her mind. Because when she does? The person leaves. She’s watched it happen time after time after time, and she can’t bear the idea of not having Foggy in her life.Besides, she’s a thousand percent sure that he doesn’t see her that way. And that’s okay too. He deserves someone he loves. He deserves the world.“Dis seem really unfair. Wha’s dat called? Leadin’ da witness?”💛: who believes in soulmates?

She’s absolutely sure they both do, but it’s surprisingly not something that’s come up in casual conversation. And if she were honest with herself, she’d admit he’s already found that person. And she absolutely has no remorse punching a certain blind-man dead in the face if he ever breaks Foggy’s heart.Again.

#mahalo!darling <33 #Sorry it took so long but there you have it! All the hearts! #{{would loooove to see your taken on them >.>}} #Just How Deep Do You Believe|Foggy Nelson #This Whole Crusade|Foggy and Beth #Curious and Grim|Daredevil verse #Hotter than Hell's Kitchen|New York Serenade #seamshatteredking

[somewhere-in-my-weird-mind]

‘You Mean Everything, Especially To Me’ - Peter Parker Imagine (Part 3 - Final part)

(Part 1) (Part 2)

Paring: Peter Parker x Female!Reader

Summary: The hints that maybe your feelings aren’t one-sided keeps coming, and you keep overthinking, that is until you don’t have to overthink it anymore. 

Word Count: 4.8K

Warning: Peter is being an ass, and some of the things he does is mean, and I wish I didn’t have to write him saying these things... but I needed plot development, which leads to him saying some mean stuff. 

A/N: So I meant to post this a couple of hours ago, but I had a bit difficulties with writing the ending. But here it is, the final part to it, hope you guys like it!

So you had just kissed your crush of the last two years, on the cheek sure, but you kissed him. Off course you had given him head kisses before, but your mom gave you those too, no it had been a kiss to the cheek, but more importantly, it had been a kiss that was received with a blush. It wasn’t a laugh like what the hell are you doing my dear friend, no but a… well… you weren’t sure what exactly it meant, but it felt like it meant something!

It had been a thought going through your head for the whole way to the subway with the boys, and the whole way until you arrived at Delmar’s deli, there another thought started occupying your thought.

When you turned the corner and was faced with the wreckage that was still the store after the bank robbery the other night, Peter suddenly became a lot quieter, and you noticed his shoulder started becoming a lot tenser. You found yourself reaching out to take his hand, because during the past occurrences where Peter showed clear discomfort, you had reached out to hold his hand, so it had become a sort of reflex. And you were right, once again, Peter seemed to ease up a bit, and a smile spread across his lips, but for some reason, it felt different this time. You decided not to think more of it, because, well you already had so much to think about it felt, instead you just held his hand and decided to push those thoughts back into the head to when you were alone and would have time to think more about what the hell all of this meant. However, it seemed that it reached a point where it wasn’t even needed again. When Demlar started talking about how after the attack on New York those years back, he had made sure to put it in his insurance that any alien or super person related incidents would be covered, so that he was fine, and was even considering a small expansion with the money he had gotten from the insurance company, Peter seemed to suddenly feel a lot better about it all. And so, it was only when you noticed Ned eyeing you holding Peter’s hand that you pulled your hand back, but then Peter had also started talking with more ease to Mr. Delmar so you felt it was all right.

After the meeting with Mr. Delmar the three of you decided to part up, knowing that at least you still had a couple of assignment and projects for school that you needed to work on. Though that was especially true for you since you had pushed a couple of those aside yesterday when you went to visit Peter, but you didn’t mention that part, since Ned was still unaware of that. As you were all students with a lot of school work to get around to, you all parted on the corner and went your own way back home.

You had managed to make it through dinner with your family and was back in your room before suddenly you were pulled back into the thought about Peter, as he had apparently attempted to call you a couple of times while you were eating.

Immediately your thoughts went to the worst case scenario, that something else has happened, that you needed to rush to his apartment again to comfort him, so you call him up right away, and the moment he answers you starts talking. “Peter? Are you alright? Do you need me to come over?” you ask hurridly.

He almost pauses for a moment, as if he was trying to figure out just what you would need him to come over for, before it finally dawns on him “Oh, no, it’s nothing like that. I was just calling for some help on the chemistry project” He says.

“Oh really?” You ask, as immediately you’re skeptical because no way is Peter calling you for help on the topic that is his strong suit, the same one he knows very well isn’t yours, as it’s the same topic you usually ask him for help with.

“Yeah, well I think maybe I skipped that lesson when I was doing the internship you know, so yeah, I think I’m missing some of the notes for that” He explains, and now you know he’s lying. With you perhaps spending a bit too much time gazing at Peter and noticing whenever he is there, and when he’s not, you know very well that Chemistry is the topic where he has zero absence in.

“Alright” You hums, deciding to go along with it. “What do you need help with” You continue, and starts listening to the problem of the project that he apparently needs your help with.

You try to help him out with it, and continue even when he blows his cover when he offers an explanation to something that you said you didn’t know, from the class where the project was explained in the first place. But you don’t call him out on it, instead you try to hide the smile in your voice, as you get confirmed in the belief that the reason he’s doing this, is because of the simple reason that he wanted to talk, yet didn’t know a reason to start the conversation, so he made one up.

To be honest you’re not complaining, as any time spent being able to talk more to him, is well spent time in your book. So when you manage to finish the chemistry project together, you gladly take up some of the other homework and assignments you both have for, asking or offering help to it, just to keep the conversation going. And before you know it, you have managed to finish both of your homework and assignments that you had through teamwork, but it doesn’t stop then, as soon as you just mentioned another topic, he gladly starts contributing stuff to talk about, just to avoid the time when you would have to hang up. Just a little bit longer, you kept hoping.

It’s when you’re re-discussing the Star Wars conversation that Peter had blanked out on during lunch break today, when you hear someone knocking on the door on Peter’s end, and him telling them to come in. It’s May, telling him that he missed his bedtime by a couple of hours, you turn and look at the time.

“Fuck, is it already past midnight” You mutter, causing Peter to laugh on the other end.

“Yeah, where did time just go,” He says softly, not quite asking, but it does make you wonder, as both of you fall silent again.

“Thanks” You hear Peter says quietly.

“What for?” You ask, not quite sure because you don’t feel like there’s anything to say thank you for.

“Well, for everything in these past days really. For coming over yesterday, for just being there today, and well, for tonight. It was nice talking to you, I enjoyed it” He says softly as if speaking it at any louder volume would reveal any louder meaning to just what was behind those words. You, however, couldn’t help but wish that he would just yell it out from the rooftops so that maybe you could finally understand the volume and meaning of the words he spoke, as it felt like you were still completely clueless about it. Sure, there were certain things that hinted to things and feelings, but you knew that you wouldn’t want to act on a small hunch, not if it wasn’t certain, and not if it would mess up what you had. Because even though you might be wanting to kiss him silly, these conversations about whatever really, still made you over the moon happy, so if you had to settle for that, you could do that.

Nonetheless, you thought that the simplified truth would still be a safe play, no matter what he felt. “I enjoyed it too” You muttered. But after a moment of silence, you felt yourself adding “I always enjoy talking to you” And then you found yourself bringing up your hand and started to bite your nails, a nervous habit you had picked up since you were afraid of your words hiding too much volume.

“Likewise” You heard him say though, causing you to stop biting your nails, but you felt yourself hiding your smile in your hand instead.

“Last chance to stop the chatting with your girl before I take your phone away from you Peter” You heard May yelling on the other end. Instantly you wanted to ask what she meant with the ‘your girl’ but before you could ask, you heard Peter groan before adding a hurried ‘goodbye, see you tomorrow’ before he hung up.

What was that all about? You couldn’t help but think, but mainly, you just thought of how much you liked the sound of you being ‘his girl’, well minus the sexist undertones of you being his property, but well for the purpose of you being Peter’s girl, you could ignore that for now.

You closed down everything before you went to bed, keeping in mind the ‘your girl’ part though.

By the time that next day came around, however, you felt you could almost have gone without the ‘your girl’ comment if it meant that you could have caught a couple of more hours of sleep. It apparently also looked pretty clear to other people that you hadn’t caught that much sleep, judging by the looks Ned was sending you when he first saw you, in the one class the two of you had together.

“Who kept you up last night?” He laughed as he took out his notebook for the work together you had been set to do.

“Peter” you responded, still very sleep deprived and therefore unable to pick up that it had been a joke, but you quickly found out what he meant when you turned to look at him and saw him being speechless and looking rather shocked. “Oh, no, not like that” You added quickly, but though he did look less shocked, he still remained a bit speechless.

You had managed to finish half of the work, by the time that he came to a point where he could speak again. But by the time that he then spoke, he managed to make you speechless. “So how long have you and Peter then been a thing?”

“We’re not a thing,” You said, as you looked down to keep writing. “I swear, you’re the second person asking that” You mutter, not sure why it was that your non-existent love life had suddenly turned in to such a popular topic.

“Who was the other person?” Ned asked, you told him it was Michelle, only to receive a long stare.

“What?” You asked.

“Well, it’s just. She’s usually pretty observant” He said, looking at you as if he expected you to explain. “And well, she’s often right in her observations” He added. You knew where he was going but you weren’t sure what to tell him.

“Well there’s nothing there,” You said, maybe in a bit higher pitch than you had wanted it to be, but you just focused on the paper and the work that you had. However, out of the corner of your eye, you could see him looking at you as if he was just expecting something more.

“It’s nothing okay” You just said, hoping to get him off it or something, but he keeps staring at you. So finally, you look around, and you see that everyone else is indulged in the work that the two of you should be doing, so you lean in closer as you whisper the words aloud for the first time “Okay, so maybe I like him a little bit”

Immediately his hands go up in the air, and a wide smile breaks out on his face. You quickly pull his hands down and hush at him not to make any noise, but you can’t help but break out into a small smile yourself because he seems so excited for you. And well, he hasn’t told you that it’s a completely unrealistic thing that will never happen, which is nice, but you would still rather have him be quiet about it so not everyone in the class will find out about it.

“Keep quiet, it’s a secret okay” You whisper as you look around to make sure that no one is paying that much attention to you.

“I’m not sure I can keep this a secret though! This is like, almost the second best thing to ever have happened to me, it’s my two best friends, and they’re together, and they will marry each other, and I will both be the best man and best girl!” He whispered with a beaming smile.

“Shut it will you” You whisper but you start to chuckle as well with his ridiculous words. “We’re not together, and we probably won’t get married.” You tell him, and he finally quiets down a bit.

“So you haven’t told him?” He asks with wide eyes.

“No of course I haven’t, he doesn’t feel the same way” You whisper as your smile falter a little bit.

“What do you mean he doesn’t feel the same way?” Ned asks as if he doesn’t believe you.

“Well, because first of all he’s in love with Liz, everyone knows that. Michelle said that he had been sending me looks like the ones I had been sending him, but she’s wrong, I don’t think it’s like that” You say as you tick off another answer on the sheet in front of you, now not feeling the same humor you had previously.

“But do you know for sure it isn’t like that?” Ned asks as he sense you not feeling that happy about it anymore either.

“Well, no” You start.

“Well then who’s to say you’re right, I think you should try and ask him,” Ned says before he widens his eyes as if he just got the best idea in the world. “I could totally help you out! Like I could casually throw it into a conversation… Or no, even better! I could help you pick out a fancy outfit or something like that, and then you can show up and bat your eyelashes and whip your hair out or something like that, and then he just won’t be able to resist you” He says in the sense that he is fully serious.

“You really don’t know girls do you” You laugh at him just as the bell rings and your teacher tells you to wrap it up.  Ned immediately starts protesting before stopping halfway into his argument to nod that yeah maybe he’s not the most familiar with the ways of the female gender.

The two of you exited the classroom and stood by the side of the wall as you let everyone else exit for lunch.

“But really though” Ned started as he looked at you, this time looking sincere “It’s going to be alright, no matter what he might say when you tell him.” Ned kept looking sincerer about it, but there was also a twinkle in his eyes like he was certain that things were going to be alright. You decided to just hold on to that and trust him in that, because then at least one of you was certain. In the end, you decided to pull him in for a hug because god knows you needed right now with everything being so weird, with Peter acting so strange, but with you unable to pinpoint if it was strange because of the loss of the internship or if it was something else. As an instinct, you buried your head in Ned’s neck, partly because it felt nice to be hugged and understood, but also because you wanted to stop a potential tear coming out.

“Hey, what’s going on here?” You heard that familiar voice say, and as you stepped out of the hug and turned around, sure enough, there was Peter.

“Oh nothing” You mumbled, and Ned added the same comment, perhaps a bit too quick, which became clear with Peter looking suspiciously at both of you. Ned looked at you and couldn’t help but laugh, causing you to break out a small smile as well. However while you were laughing it seemed that Peter was doing anything but laughing, as you turned around to face him again, he was staring at yours and Neds interaction with a displeased look on his face.

“Anyway, let’s head to lunch” He just said as he turned around and started walking towards the cafeteria. You looked to face Ned as if to hear if he knew what was going on, but he seemed just as unaware of what had caused Peter’s sudden mood change as you.

“We should probably hurry” Peter yelled back at the two of you, causing you only to be more confused.  

“Christ Peter, no one is going to take our table, we literally only got it because no one wanted it next to the trash cans” Ned comment as the two of you follow after Peter nonetheless.

“Well you never know Ned, sometimes people come in and snatch things that are yours, even when you thought they wouldn’t” Peter just snapped while continuing to walk three steps ahead of you.

“Peter calm down would you” You yell ahead since you felt that he was starting to be a bit rude. It seemed after your comment he did stay quiet but remained three steps ahead of you and Ned to the walk to the cafeteria. When you got to the cafeteria, Peter seemed to make a point of dropping off his bag at your table, as if he needed to make sure your seat wasn’t taken. Ned, unsure what Peter was getting at, and also starting to get a bit tired of it, just went to queue in line for food, dragging you along with him. When Peter came back, he even made a show of getting back into the line instead of joining you at your place in the line.

“What has gotten into him” You muttered as you started putting food on your plate.

“No clue” Ned just muttered as he continued up the line. When you were done getting the food you wanted, you went over to the cashier and turned to look behind you to see how far Peter was, only to see him staring at you, but as soon as he saw you looking his way, he turned around again.

Was that those longing stares that Michelle had been talking about because you had to say, it looked like the ones you had been sending him. Well, the ones you had been sending him before he started acting like a real asshole. But even though he was annoying you, you couldn’t help but feel a small blush coming along, because those stares were the ones you had thought Michelle had gotten wrong, that he would never send you, yet here it was. Could that mean that some of the other things she had been thinking and hinting at were true as well?

You decided not to focus on that as you sat down next to Ned on the bench with your food and the chocolate milk the three of you always bought. Shortly afterward Peter joined you on the bench, but unlike before when he was gazing at you from afar, he now kept his gaze locked on the tray of food, and sat down on the opposite side of you and Ned, silently.

“Well, the cafeteria food has gotten better, I’m starting to take too much lately because it’s so good,” Ned said to finally break the silence that was lying over the part of your table.

“With how you look, it’s not really a surprise that you take too much of the cafeteria food” Peter muttered.

“Peter” you yelled outraged, causing a couple of people around you to look over, but you couldn’t really care less right now. You looked over at Ned who wasn’t even looking at Peter, but just looking down at his food with a blank and hurt face, that on the boy who usually always had a smile, made your heart hurt. You placed a hand on Ned’s shoulder making sure he was alright, but as you started comforting Ned, Peter just stood up and left the table.

“Are you alright?” You asked Ned.

“I’m fine, but I think you should go after Peter, because something is definitely wrong with him” Ned just commented as he went over to take Peter’s chocolate milk, claiming it was his revenge. You gave Ned a small comforting smile before you took off, you needed to give Peter a piece of your mind.

You find him leaning his head up against the cold surface of the lockers outside the cafeteria. You walk over and punch him as hard as you can on the side of his arm.

“Ouch” Peter yells out as he turns around to face you.

“Well, you deserve it” You just roared “What the hell was that even about. What has Ned done to you, well what has he ever done to you besides be your best friend?” At least Peter had the decency to look a bit hurt as you brought up Ned.

“Shouldn’t you be back there comforting him” Peter just comments as he rubs his arm where you hit him. You can’t help but be a little bit pleased that you managed to hit him hard enough for him to feel sore, but you’re also really confused about what he’s even talking about.

“No Ned’s alright, instead he is being incredibly kind and forgiving, and send me to go after you, as both Ned and I have no clue what the hell has gotten into you” You snap as you cross your arms, awaiting him to give you some answers.

“It’s Ned and I now is it” Peter just said, causing you to just look at him confused, once again, because why is that what he’s picking out on, instead of finally giving you some answers. “Forget it, just go back to Ned and comfort him with a long hug or something, I don’t know what you two get up to, clearly” Peter just added before looking down at his shoes again. Suddenly, it dawns on you, the weird thing he was going with had started after you and Ned had hugged after last period.

“Wait, is that what this is about? Me hugging ned” You ask slightly perplexed, judging by Peter’s silence, you had hit the spot. “That is ridiculous” You yell, unable to believe Peter right now, why would he get mad because you hugged Ned, that is… and then you start to piece it together, and the sour look on Peter’s face as he keeps looking anywhere by at you. “Were you jealous?”

Peter immediately looks up at you and opens his mouth as if he wants to disagree with you, but he seems unable to form a proper sentence, so you take it as the truth.

“Peter, why?” You ask him. “Why would you be jealous of Ned, you’re both my best friends, there’s nothing to be jealous off” You would have thought that would at least clear up some of the weird behaviour he was acting, yet as you mentioned him as your best friend, it was like it made it worse. And then it finally dawned on you, the gazes that Michelle talked about, the ones you caught him doing in the queue, the blush the kiss on the cheek had caused, the call yesterday and the stupid excuse to why he called you.

“Does this have anything to do with why you made up a stupid excuse for a chemistry project just so you could talk to me yesterday?” You ask quietly, afraid that you have touched on something completely wrong and is about to embarrass and possibly reveal yourself, but this time when you ask, he looks up at you, straight on, and he no longer looks annoyed, no with the look he’s sending you, you know you’ve hit bulls eye.

“Maybe” You hear a small mutter, as a small blush started spreading on the boy’s cheek. Suddenly it’s like you can finally breathe properly again. It’s been 2 long years of you crushing on a boy, and it’s been 2 long days of you overthinking everything, but now, with a blush and ‘maybe’ you can breathe, because you know you aren’t going crazy.

“Peter Parker, you are a moron,” You say, but with a small laughter in your voice, this causes Peter to look up at you. “But you’re a cute one” you add with a small smile, and you can’t help but laugh again as Peter is standing with his mouth slightly agape as he stares at you.

“The reason I was hugging Ned” You start, wanting to at least clear the air, “Was because I told him that I liked someone, who I didn’t think liked me back. That someone, was you” You breathe out a breath you have been holding, but now you’re the one who looks to the ground, as you don’t want to face Peter. Sure, he might be a blushing mess, but at least he isn’t the one that put everything out in the open and was now just standing awaiting some kind of acknowledgment or response to it.

And what a response you got. It was two fast steps for him to walk from the lockers over to you, before his hands were placed carefully on both of your cheeks, and before his lips met yours.

It was sweet and chaste, but it was like honey for you as you had imagined this for too long now. As Peter leaned back out again, he ran a thumb down your cheek affectionately, and you couldn’t help but hum a bit as you opened your eyes again, only to be met by Peter who was smiling so sweetly.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for so long now” He whispered with a small giggle.

“Can’t say I would have minded if you had done it a lot sooner, it would have saved me a lot of overthinking” You laughed. Peter laughed a bit as he apologized. “That’s alright, this is good too” You hummed before leaned in again for another kiss, only to bump your nose into as you had both leaned in.

“Sorry, I’m not the best at this” You giggled, only to have Peter join.

“Well neither am I” He just said.

“I still can’t believe that you were jealous of Ned though,” You said with a laugh. “He’s my best friend, and he isn’t the one I’ve been crushing on for the past couple of years now”

“Well, I don’t know, it’s just, it’s been so long with me wanting to have something with you, and then after the whole thing with the internship happened, you were there, and I could lean up against you, and it felt so good. So, when you held my hand the next day and even gave me a kiss on the cheek, it felt like something special, something I could hold on to. But then I saw you hug Ned today, the same way you hugged me, and I don’t know, it was like whatever I had thought I had with you was just taken away.” He confesses shyly.

“Well, how about this then” You spoke with a small smile “I will promise you that all of my kisses from now on belong to you” You leaned over and kissed him once on the cheek, the nose, and finally met his lips again.

“That sounds perfect,” Peter said with a wide smile.

“But you definitely still need to go back and apologize to Ned for being such an ass, especially over something as stupid as this,” You said sternly, still not agreeing with the way that he handled the jealousy over for his best friend.

“I will, right after this” He promise you before looking up at you with a smile. “Y/N Y/L/N, will you please go to homecoming with me,” Peter asked shyly, and you couldn’t help but laugh that he would still feel so shy asking you when it hadn’t even been a minute since you kissed him.

“Of course I do” You just said happily before you leaned in for another taste of that sweet, sweet honey.

Tagging: @yetitty @dreamer7black @tiny-friggin-human

Permanent taggings: @savaneafricaine  @tmrhollandkay @purple-storm  @itsluzymeh  @morgannope @lilackimmi @let-me-luve-you @capcrayon

Tell me if you want to be tagged in any future works of mine as well 

#peter parker #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #tom holland #tom holland fanfiction #tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader #spiderman fanfiction #spiderman imagine #spiderman x reader #Spider-Man: Homecoming #spiderman #own writing #own imagine

[mewtwo24]

Jihyun Kim/V x MC Headcanons

I have no explanation for this, other than I’m hopelessly in love with Jihyun Kim and I really wanted to do this as the self-indulgent trash that I am. I hope those of you that read it enjoy it, and that I’ve done him justice. Under the cut because this became way longer than I thought it would be;;;

Also note: Mild Good End V route spoilers

Who is the cuddler? 

Jihyuuuuuun Kim ladies and gentleman. This man--not unlike his best friend--is touch-starved; between his father’s cold indifference and his rocky relationship with his mother he’s never really been close to people that way. Most of his memories of interaction--that don’t include Jumin because these boys have the best bro hugs and chill FIGHT ME--were awkward and uncomfortable. All that came to mind were the moments when his father would place a hand or an arm around his shoulder to prove to everyone except the one person that mattered that he was a wonderful, affectionate father. Even with Rika the halcyon days of their love were few, for all the comforting moments in each other’s arms there were far greater marked with terror, reluctance, and shadow. It’s enough that by the time MC reaches him he is extremely hesitant to reach out or connect with a person that way. The first time she hugs him he is shell-shocked, not because of the MC’s bold approach, but the extent to which her warmth soothed him. It was staggering--a complete mystery--the way his arms moved on their own to pull her closer and lose himself in that gentleness. Touching somebody was no longer a means to communicate something or a forced accommodation; as with Jumin or his mother or even Rika.

No.

Now it was a matter of need; he craved the closeness of her form to his. His greatest indulgence is simply laying with her in the still of the afternoon sun, drowsy and bathed in sunlight as he listens to the steadfast beating of her heart; the most beautiful sound in all the world to him, the sound that saved him. On the nights where nightmares strike or he relapses in his trauma it’s the only thing that can give him peace. Whether his head lies featherlight against her chest or his lips rest against the thrumming of her pulse--faced tucked into her neck as she runs her hands gently through his hair--it never fails to brighten his mood.

As such this boy does not hesitate after his initial caution; he can always be seen holding her hand, pressing light kisses to her temple or the crown of her head, shoulders and thighs touching whenever they’re seated together and his head is always leaning slightly toward hers (the entire RFA finds it adorable as all hell how he looks like a happy lil hermit crab and Jumin marvels at how different he is with her, has to stifle the rush of emotion that comes with seeing his friend genuinely happy for the first time. “Kindly keep your evaluations to yourself Luciel, why would I do something as absurd as cry over something like this” THIS BOI IS HOLDING BACK TEARS DON’T LET THE WINE FOOL YOU)

Who makes the bed? 

MC, in that Jihyun???? Doesn’t even think about it, it was just always done for him. Though he starts to make an effort as soon as he notices MC is rather meticulous about it, until she reassures him that it’s a personal habit rather than something she can’t stand to see undone. Even so, if he gets up last he’ll make it anyway henceforth. Whenever MC spots the corners smoothed and tucked in neatly her heart melts at his genuine desire to meet her halfway.

Who has the weird taste in music? 

Definitely Jihyun. I am a firm believer that his mother had a modest record collection that he’s added to ever since what happened, and he just has a whole room full of them now. Some are classics, some are more recent, and others are just plain random finds but he loves them all. He remembers the exact day he bought at least half of them, and prefers to listen to music this way. It makes him feel closer to his mother, and there’s just something about the sound that feels... soulful, more real somehow. Ever since he brought her there for a midnight twirl it’s tradition for them to dance together once a month to a song of their choosing. Under the light of the stars there’s a lot of giggling and thoughtful swaying, a quiet night to indulge in the beauty of their love and shared closeness.

Who is more protective? 

I feel like MC would be given the circumstances. In that--though Jihyun did a lot of soul-searching and learned how to love himself first before returning to MC to even approach her about a relationship--MC saw him at his absolute lowest point. So I think she would be very aware of who interacted with Jihyun and what their intentions were, though not in the jealous sense; just because she was worried somebody might say or do something that would take him back to those moments when he was struggling in his life. Though Jihyun might be better now she knows that some days are harder than others, and she’s always there to provide all the encouragement and patience he needs when he gets a little too stubborn or down on himself. I also think there might be times when people take advantage of Jihyun’s silence and easygoing nature for their own ends, something that MC looks out for and subtly draws the line where he might fail to notice or feel uncomfortable voicing directly.

That said I think Jihyun is extremely protective too (I mean jesus the lengths he goes to to protect the RFA), just in a more subtle way that may not be noticeable to some. I think it would be the silent gestures, little things he did without comment or fanfare--but MC notices and loves him all the more for it; like how he never lets her walk on the part of the sidewalk closest to the street or tactfully diverts the attention of somebody being hostile towards her. Even in more extreme situations he doesn’t get aggressive, rather his retaliations are like the sudden autumn breeze; soft and swift but no less chilling. He’s the kind of person who says something offhand that seems neutral or polite but hours later the person wakes up shook at how badly they were roasted by our blue angel. He’s always afraid MC will think he’s scary in those rare moments where his temper gets the best of him, but she secretly finds it kinda hot holy shit.

Who sings in the shower? 

MCCCCC and Jihyun melts on the spot. He thinks it’s the cutest, purest habit ever. But he doesn’t want to disturb her so he’ll pretend he doesn’t hear it or doesn’t notice. It’s only when he’s humming the songs she was singing that she figures it out, and Jihyun sheepishly admits that he always loves it when she sings and was afraid of making her uncomfortable. He tells her that she’s always welcome to sing around the house as much as she likes, and always loves coming home to her trilling lightly. He finds her voice very soothing, whether it be a low lullaby just for him or a showtune. Sometimes he joins her with his bright tenor if he knows the song, but he’s so bashful and she’s so touched they both end up red by the end. After a little while though they trade lines easily, playful and a little dramatic; especially if it’s a well-known love song or the like.

Who cries during movies? 

Jihyun actually, he’s such a softie he tears up easy and pushes his face into MC’s shoulder, mumbling and a little mortified. She’ll let out a little giggle at his embarrassment, cupping his face and placing light kisses all over in an attempt to soothe him as she settles into his lap. She can hear his pout when he tells her he’s fine, but the tender look on her face makes him return to the cradle of her arms; content to find comfort in her warmth.

Who spends the most while out shopping? 

Jihyun. Not intentionally though, he’s just so used to never really being concerned about price tags that he doesn’t pay close attention. He’s only marginally more well-versed than Jumin is about normal living, something that’s easy to forget in the face of his remarkable sensibilities. I don’t know MC, how much does cereal usually cost $50? No Jihyun, cereal is not $50.

Who kisses more roughly? 

Jihyun. Though this boy is almost always sweet and languid, there will be days where he has trouble hiding just how much he loves her and wants her. Even so his rough is only a mildly more intense version of his usual self. His hands will hold fast to her waist, one moving up to her chin to coax her mouth to his at his favorite angle. Pulling one thigh over his hip as he desperately seeks her taste, relentless and engulfing, his MC will soon be dazed with need and gripping his arms. It won’t be long before he tugs and bites lightly on her lower lip, enjoying her answering shiver as things get a little rougher than he might intend. He just needs more of those delighted sighs, the sound of his name, that loving look; more of her holding him warm and tight and irrevocably here, more and more until that’s all he can think about. The next morning he’ll notice her soreness and the dark marks scattered across her chest with immense concern, feeling terrible; but MC always reassures him that she’s not remotely upset. It’s a rather rare occurrence however, perhaps if the sheer extent of his ardor gets the better of him on off days or she wears something particularly flattering.

Who is more dominate? 

I’d say they’re about even, but admittedly MC is probably a smidge moreso. Jihyun is rather easygoing, so he doesn’t really mind who takes charge as long as they’re both happy and comfortable however they decide to be. He appreciates it when she’s confident and honest about what she wants, it helps him relax and keep from overthinking too much.

My rating of the ship 1-10: 

Honestly Cheritz’s execution of their relationship was a spot-on 10/10 for me because the entire relationship was so healthy and good. Jihyun’s MC loves him purely for who he is; the entire route is spent helping him bring the broken pieces of his life back together simply because she wants to help instead of romancing him, which is something Jihyun desperately needs at this point in time. MC’s love is unconditional in the healthiest sense, in that her affection serves to reassure him without attachments. She’s not supporting him in the hopes that she’ll get a relationship out of this, she’s supporting him because her heart is breaking to see him in pain. She’s supporting him because she truly wants him to heal and be happy and live for the first time in his life, even if that means he’ll choose someone else. Because in truth, the last thing Jihyun needs is a relationship after what happened with Rika. The only way you can Good End is by giving him the time he needs to understand and love himself--two years of self-discovery--before he sheepishly approaches you with the hope that you’ll still have him. (Fun fact I sobbed at that part because???? God he’s just so pure and earnest and doing his best and I was so, so proud of him for healing so beautifully and finding himself kill me get the tissues of course I’ll be your gf Jihyun it would be my honor). In short, my love for Jihyun is endless and he deserves to be eternally happy with his MC thank you.

#mystic messenger #v mystic messenger #jihyun kim #jihyun x mc #v route #i love this man so much #like #*stares at hands* #idk what to do with myself #i crave this gentle kind of love #the kind thats slow and patient and casually engulfing #its not a matter of proving anything to anyone #its just genuine adoration and support and freedom #anyways pls enjoy guys #sorry i havent written in a while i guess i've just reached a bit of a weird roadblock

[onemuseleft]

Voltron fic, PG, 1/1

Title: Untitled platonic cuddling fic Pairing: Keith/Lance, Lance & Hunk friendship, Keith & Hunk & Lance friendship Rated: PG for general horny Keith and some mild language Warnings: None Word Count: 3632 Summary: Keith’s just getting used to the whole “committed relationship” thing and the whole “family” thing but he’s pretty sure he likes it. In other news, Hunk’s having a rough night, Lance is a good bro and Keith is learning how to have what he wants.

Dedicated to @maplerosekisses who prompted me for platonic bedsharing and Keith/Lance.

Thanks to @musicalluna and @humantrampoline85 for proof reading and general hand-holding.

****

It was later than expected when Keith finished on the training deck.

He checked the time as the droids shut down with a soft hum that that other Paladins swore they couldn’t hear. It was past midnight, ship-time, which means he’d lost track of time more than three hours ago. How did one more round always turn into a multi-hour combat scenario?

He sent the droids back to the storage units and grabbed his things off the floor. It wasn’t all that late, comparatively and if he hurried Lance might still be awake. He’d wait up for Keith sometimes and Keith could slip into bed next to him, sheets already warm, and tangle their legs together under the covers as he sank into Lance’s arms.

Keith was pretty sure if he’d known how good it felt to know someone was waiting for you he’d have given this whole “committed relationship” thing a shot before now.

He hesitated for a moment outside the showers, but he hadn’t brought anything with him and the Altean all-purpose soap stuff made his hair frizz up and his skin feel stiff, which always made Lance scrunch up his nose. He could just run back to his room and grab a few things - or if Lance was still awake, Keith could shower at home and possibly convince Lance to give him a hand. A wet, slippery hand.

Anticipation thrummed low in his belly and he grinned. Yeah, he should have tried this out much sooner.

He didn’t quite jog through the halls on his way back to his room, but his workout hadn’t tired him out so much as revved his engine. He wanted to fight a little more, he wanted to run, he wanted to get his blood up even hotter than it already was. Or even better, he could really go for a fuck, Lance’s hands holding him down and the stretch and burn in Keith’s thighs as he pulled Lance in closer, harder. He paused outside the door to their room and pulled in a deep breath through his teeth, already half hard just from the thought of it and fervently hoping Lance hadn’t gone to sleep already.

Maybe he wouldn’t mind being woken up. Keith grinned at the thought of Lance, sleep-soft and warm-skinned, how his eyes would go dark and hazy as Keith touched him. Shit. He hit the palm plate that would open the door, and stepped into an empty room.

It took a second to scan the room, but it was definitely empty and there was no sign Lance had been there for a while - his jacket was gone and his nightly moisturizing regimen didn’t appear to have been started.

Keith dropped his jacket over the back of a chair and ran a hand through his hair, wincing a little as cooling drops of sweat dripped onto his neck and shoulders. Well, all right, so much for that plan.

He gave a brief thought to going to look for Lance, but that seemed too much. Keith was a lot more comfortable with the relationship thing and the intimacy thing than he had been a year ago when they first started this, but tracking Lance down in front of their friends and dragging him home for sex was… probably a little too much for Keith to deal with. Especially if Lance was with Coran. Keith kind of already felt like Coran was one shotgun wedding away from embracing the role of Lance’s over-protective step-father or something. He really, really didn’t want to imagine trying to convince Lance to come home and shower with him under Coran’s knowing eyes.

Even worse was the very real possibility that Coran would realize what Keith was doing and go all winky and nudgey about it. Shiro had done that once and Keith had almost choked on his own tongue.

He showered quickly and rinsed out his workout gear, leaving it to hang on what he had always assumed was a towel rack, although Alteans had glass-enclosed tubes that shot out hot air to basically blow-dry your entire body, so who even knew what they’d need with towels. He ran his fingers through his hair to work out any lingering tangles and used some of Lance’s face lotion because Lance always got weirdly hot when he realized Keith was using his beauty products.

Also it really felt nice, but Keith would probably eat hot coal before he’d admit that.

It was past one now and still no Lance. Keith hesitated, wondering if going to look for him would be needy or clingy, then deciding if it was then Lance could just tell him to shove off. It was a lot later than Lance usually came to bed - Keith was just going to check and make sure everything was alright.

That was acceptable boyfriend behavior right? He could go see if Lance was ready for bed and if he wasn’t then he could offer to keep him company and if Lance didn’t want company he could come back and get some sleep for once.

Right. He was overthinking this again.

Shiro always told him when he was overthinking the social stuff to just start with the basics. All right. The basics were that he wanted to see Lance. So. That’s what he was gonna do. He’d tackle the rest as it came.

But the kitchen was empty, and the main room, and the bridge. Keith checked under the consoles, just in case Lance had fallen asleep watching the stars again, but all he found was the mice, curled up in a corner under the command console in a big heap. The littlest one chirped at him sleepily before rolling over and going back to sleep.

Technically Lance still had his own room, so Keith headed there next. He felt weird at the thought that Lance might be in there, like a rock in his stomach, sick but not. Lance hadn’t slept in his own (old) room in months and Keith wasn’t so stupid at this relationship thing to not know that Lance going off to sleep by himself all of a sudden was a problem. He hesitated a long moment outside the door to Lance’s old room before he rolled his eyes at himself, wiped his palms on the thighs of his jeans, and palmed the door open.

The room was still and empty in a way that places got when no one had been in them for a while. Keith blew out a heavy breath, more relieved than he really knew what to do with and backed out of the room.

All right, so where the hell was Lance?

“Are you glaring at the door for a reason or is this just what you do when you’re wandering the halls at night like an insomniac housecat?”

Keith frowned over his shoulder. “I am not a housecat. And I’m not glaring.”

Pidge offered him a crooked grin. “Oh, Keith. I don’t know which of your self-delusions to shatter first. Seriously though, you’re blocking the hall. Move it.”

He took a hasty step to the side. Her eyes had dark crescents underneath them and she was getting that general air of cheerful amusement brought on by hard core sleep deprivation. The last time he’d seen her like that she’d actually fallen asleep during combat practice. Shiro had flipped her onto the mat and she’d fallen asleep so fast Shiro had been convinced he’d hurt her. Lance and Hunk had dragged her off to bed, laughing about how she’d done the same thing in school while Shiro followed them, threatening them all with curfews and bed checks. “Have you seen Lance?”

She blinked at him slowly. “Not recently?” She didn’t sound entirely certain about that. “Um. He said something about looking for Hunk after dinner, so I’d start there.”

“Thanks.” He waited for her to pass. “You should probably sleep,” he added, just in case she’d been planning to head back to her workshop or something.

“For a couple days at least,” she agreed. “But I’m gonna settle for about ten hours, because that’s how long it’ll take my program to compile. Tell your boyfriend that if he wakes me before lunch I will make him regret it.”

Considering that Lance wasn’t usually inclined to get up before lunch himself unless he had to, she was probably safe. “I’ll keep him out of your way.”

She leered at him briefly, which was almost as bad as Coran doing it. “Yeah, I bet you will.”

“Okay, I’m just going to…” Keith flailed briefly, because he really was no good at this. He wasn’t used to people teasing him for good reasons and it still made him a little uncomfortable that the whole damn team knew his personal business. “I’m gonna go. You should sleep. A lot.”

She waved a hand at him and yawned so hard her jaw cracked. “Yeah, that’s the plan. You go do whatever angry house cats do after midnight.”

Hunk’s door was closed and Keith hesitated a second, shooting a glance down the hall as Pidge’s door slid shut behind her. Was it too late to be knocking on people’s doors? Pidge had told him to check with Hunk, but Pidge was not in a position to be mocking Keith’s sleeping habits and was therefore unreliable in this instance. Was this rude? What if Hunk was asleep? He was going to be pissed - well, Hunk-pissed, which was still nicer than Keith on a good day - if Keith just woke him up to bug him about Lance, right?

Shiro’s voice prodded at the back of his mind again, reminding him not to overthink things so much. Keith contemplated how hard it would be to kick himself in the head, then raised his hand to knock.

The door slid open beneath his hands almost before his knuckled made contact with the metal, so no one had bothered to turn on the privacy locks. Keith hesitated for a second, then stepped inside.

Hunk’s room looked like it could do double-time as an electronics store. There were coils of wire and sheets of insulating foam stacked in the corner and on the shelves, and the table across from the bed was covered with wires and bits of metal and what looked like a massive pair of bolt cutters. Hunk had a workshop that he shared with Pidge, but Keith knew he liked to fuss around with smaller, non-essential projects in his downtime. Lance said he liked to tinker, which was probably a good way to put it. Little things to keep his hands busy and his mind focused, which Keith could totally understand.

There was only one light on in the room, the soft yellow reading light by the bed. Hunk and Lance were curled up on top of the blankets, Lance slumped half-upright against the headboard. Hunk, snoring softly, was curled up beside him with his head resting on Lance’s chest and his arms wrapped around Lance’s waist. One of Lance’s arms was draped over Hunk’s shoulders, the other rested palm-up on the blankets beside him. Lance’s mouth was turned down at the corners in a tired frown and his brow was furrowed even in sleep.

Keith couldn’t help the reluctant smile that tugged at his mouth. Even asleep Lance was worrying about Hunk. Keith wished, fleetingly, that there was something he could do to help them both, but they all had demons now and nothing he could do would change that. He started to back out of the room and leave them in peace when Lance shivered, shoulders hunching as he tried to curl in on himself without dislodging Hunk.

Alright, so there was something Keith could fix.

He ducked into Hunk’s closet and found an extra blanket amongst what looked like a couple dozen computer hard drives and roughly five thousand pillows (he’d thought Lance was bad). He carefully shook it out and took it over to the bed, slowly draping it over his two sleeping teammates, tucking it around Hunk’s shoulders and pulling one corner up to cover Lance’s chest and shoulder as much as possible without covering Hunk’s entire head.

Up close it was obvious Hunk had been crying, his skin flushed and salt drying on his cheeks. Keith touched his shoulder briefly, swallowing a pang of regret. Of all of them, he thought Hunk was least suited to the life they were currently living. He wished he could do something to spare him - spare all of them, if he could, he knew Lance and Pidge hurt too, and Shiro maybe more than Keith could even know - from the nightmares and the pain of war. He felt a now-familiar pang of guilt that he was happier here than he’d ever been on Earth and pushed it away. That didn’t help anyone and he couldn’t change things anyway.

He hesitated for a moment, then reached out to carefully brush his thumb against Lance’s bottom lip, carefully tracing the soft downward curve of it. He felt silly as soon as he’d done it; Lance was asleep and couldn’t get any comfort from the touch, and anyway it wasn’t like he could just wipe away the feelings that had Lance’s mouth twisted into a frown.

Christ, emotions made people stupid sometimes.

That didn’t stop him from ghosting the backs of his fingers over Lance’s cheek before he pulled away, but he managed to stop himself from doing anything even more overtly sentimental. Instead he smoothed the blanket over them one last time and turned to leave them in peace.

He realized there was something under his foot just as it snapped under his weight with a sharp crack. Keith winced as Hunk’s snoring broke off into a sleepy grumble. Way to go, Kogane, very smooth. Very stealthy.

He checked over his shoulder, hoping they’d slept through it, but Lance was already stirring. He yawned and stretched a little, blinking in the dim light. “Keith?”

“Hey.” Keith kept his voice pitched low, barely above a whisper. Hunk wasn’t snoring but he hadn’t stirred either. Maybe he hadn’t woken them both. “Sorry. It was late, so I just wanted to check on you.”

Lance yawned again. His eyes were only half open and he was clearly not all the way awake. “What time is it? Did I miss you?”

Keith let himself smile a little bit. “No, but I missed you when you didn’t come to bed. I know you need your beauty sleep.”

“I’m already beautiful,” Lance said, a little reproachfully, which - half asleep as he was - was kind of adorable. “I meant to be home when you got back, but I didn’t want to leave Hunk.” He patted his hand gently against Hunk’s back, rubbed a little between his shoulder blades like he was soothing a dog or - or well, maybe a baby? Keith had never soothed a baby but it probably worked the same way. “What time is it?”

“Around one, ship-time.” Keith bit his tongue. Of course it was ship-time, what other time was there?” “Go back to sleep. I’ll see you in the morning, okay?”

Lance made a sound that Keith could only generously describe as a whine. “Where are you going?”

“To sleep.” Keith hesitated, then walked back to the side of the bed so he could keep his voice low. “And so should you. Get some rest.”

Lance reached out and caught Keith’s wrist with his free hand, long fingers curling against Keith’s skin. His grip was loose, easily broken, but Keith held himself very still so as not to jostle him loose. “Stay?” Lance asked. He tugged on Keith’s wrist. “I like the way it sounds when you breathe,” Lance said. “I can’t sleep without it anymore. Keep waking up looking for you.” His eyes were drooping shut, but he tugged on Keith’s wrist again. “Stay. I’m cold and your room is too far away.”

Keith wasn’t one hundred percent certain on the social protocol here, but he was pretty sure you couldn’t invite someone into a bed that wasn’t yours. He twisted his hand in Lance’s grasp, meaning to pull away, but instead found himself taking Lance’s hand in his and threading their fingers together.

“Yeah, okay.” He toed his boots off before he could start second-guessing himself and dropped his jacket over the back of Hunk’s chair. The knife he left in its sheath and slid it beneath the pillow while Lance watched him with a sleepy smile.

“Gonna protect us,” he said, brushing his hand over Hunk’s hair. He yawned so wide his jaw popped and squirmed a little as Keith climbed onto the bed beside him. “We’ll protect you, too.”

“I know that, idiot,” Keith said.  Lance curled into him as he settled on the bed, his head heavy on Keith’s shoulder, his breath warm and tickling slightly against Keith’s throat. Keith wrapped one arm around Lance’s waist to hold him close and pressed a kiss to his temple. “Go to sleep.”

Lance tipped his head back for a kiss.

Keith gave him a vaguely outraged look and stared pointedly at Hunk’s sleeping form.

Lance just rolled his eyes at him and leaned up as much as he could without jostling Hunk, pressing a soft kiss against the corner of Keith’s mouth. “Thank you for checking on me.”

“I’ll always look for you,” Keith said, which wasn’t quite what he’d meant to say, but was more true than most of the things he could have said.

“You know, some guys wouldn’t be so chill about finding their boyfriend asleep with another man.” Lance grinned, eyes sparkling a little. He was more awake than he had been a minute ago, but his voice was still low, the words soft around the edges.

“You’re not the type,” Keith said, because it was true. Keith could certainly be the jealous type, he definitely had that in him and it had reared its head once or twice, but never because of something Lance had done. For all his ladykiller nonsense and his nearly constant, truly reprehensible flirting, Lance was pretty faithful at his core - to his team, to his family and to whatever lucky idiot he  happened to have chosen to bestow his affections on. “And even if you were, Hunk isn’t. And frankly, even if he was, I knew what you two were like before I started dating you. He has first dibs.”

“Don’t you forget it,” Hunk said, words muffled slightly against Lance’s shirt. “Are you two done? This is cuddle-Hunk-to-sleep time, not talk-about-our-relationship time.”

Lance laughed. “If you’re awake, move your ass so I can get comfortable. My back is going to break in half if I have to stay like this much longer.”

Hunk grumbled but shifted and for a minute it was all kicking legs and flailing arms and blankets and sheets getting tugged back and forth. There was some enthusiastic pillow fluffing going on in there too that sent Keith scrambling to his feet to give them room. He hesitated a little, not sure if he was meant to stay now that Hunk was awake, but when the dust settled Hunk was sprawled on his stomach with his face in his pillow and Lance was stretched out beside him with a little strip of bed left for Keith. “Come on,” Lance said, holding the blanket up in clear invitation. “You have to stay. Hunk’s a blanket hog, so you have to keep me warm or I’ll freeze when he inevitably wraps himself up like a burrito.”

“These are my blankets,” Hunk said. “It’s not hogging if they’re mine. And I only do it because you get handsy in your sleep.”

“I do not!”

“You really do,” Keith said. He slid under the blankets, checked to make sure his knife hadn’t been knocked away during the rearranging. “I kind of like it, though.”

Lance gave him a look of outrage mingled with betrayal. “I hate you.”

Keith would have believed him once. But Lance’s body was loose and relaxed next to his, and when he turned on his side and held his arm up Lance came willingly, pressed up along his chest. Keith looped an arm over Lance’s waist, let his hand rest lightly on Hunk’s back. Not too personal, but enough to remind Hunk he wasn’t alone.

Hunk snaked one arm over Lance’s waist as well and curled his fingers into the neckline of Keith’s shirt. “Well, I love you both, so shut the hell up and go to sleep.”

Lance huffed, but Keith could feel the way his mouth curled into a smile against Keith’s throat. “Bet you’re sorry you came looking now, aren’t you?”

This was not at all what Keith had envisioned for his evening when he’d left the gym but somehow despite his earlier plans, he didn’t regret how the night had turned out. “Of course not,” he said.

“I love you guys, too,” he said much later, when the room was quiet with the sound of Hunk’s snores and Lance’s breath was soft and deep against Keith’s skin, and they couldn’t hear him. “If I’d known you guys were waiting for me, I’d have come a lot sooner.” He thought of Pidge a few rooms away, and Shiro in the opposite direction, both of them hopefully resting quietly. He thought of Allura and Coran a few levels above. He thought of the lions, and the way his teammates thoughts sometimes tripped along the edge of his own when they were working together especially well and thought that if he’d known having a family waiting for him would feel like this he’d have gone out and found them a long time ago.

#voltron #klance #my fic #nightwalker writes #fluff and cuddles

[biopsychs]

physics doesn’t have to suck: how to enjoy and do well in your required physics classes

As someone who doesn’t intend to take a physics class ever again, I was relieved when I walked out of my second semester physics final. That said, physics doesn’t have to suck or drag your average down. 

(1) How to enjoy physics: Adjust your attitude. Physics is so cool if you actually think about it. Your attitude will dictate your experience. (2) But physics is so hard: Change the way you study and don’t give up. I did better in university physics than in high school. The content was way more difficult but it was my studying methods that made the difference.

This post is split into 3 parts: Introductory physics (very basic physics, that unit of physics you had to do in a lower level science class), high school physics (physics from an algebra-based perspective), and university physics (calculus-based physics and labs). (Obviously these overlap a lot but I needed to organize this somehow)

INFO IS UNDER THE CUT B/C THIS POST IS RIDICULOUSLY LONG

1. INTRODUCTORY PHYSICS

Skills you should master that will greatly help you now and in the future

Converting between units

What all those symbols actually mean

Interpreting what graphs mean

Scientific notation

Know how to do algebra fairly well (esp. rearranging equations)

Khan Academy is a great resource for introductory and high school physics.

Start every question by stating all of your known and unknown variables. Write down which variables you have and which ones you need. Then, you can easily figure out which formula you need.

Make sure you’re actually understanding the concepts behind everything; plugging numbers into equations will only get you so far.

Rearrange formulas to equal the variable you need before you substitute your known values into the equation.

Use your knowledge of physics from your own experiences. Don’t overthink. Just try to picture what would happen if, say, a ball and a feather were dropped from the same height.

2. HIGH SCHOOL PHYSICS (ALGEBRA-BASED)

(Everything from part 1 applies, esp Khan Academy)

Pay attention to in class demos.

Draw free body diagrams whenever you can -- they can be annoying but quickly being able to visualize all of the forces acting is an important skill

Ask your teacher for help or clarification if you need it! You won’t always have the opportunity for one-on-one help, plus your teacher may mark you a bit easier if they see you’re really trying.

Know trigonometry well! In fact, if any of your algebra skills are weak, be sure to review. Don’t let basic math hold you back -- you can do this!

Your first step for any problem should be to write down any known variables or numbers and then the variables you need to find.

Work with a study group (just make sure everyone else is as committed as you are, otherwise studying with others won’t help). People think in different ways and you’re bound to find a solution eventually -- and less likely to give up if you can’t do it.

Get all the part marks. Write down your variables, a formula that could be applicable -- anything that might earn even half a mark (teachers are a lot more forgiving than you think)

Double check your final answer. Ensure you have the right units and ask yourself if your final answer makes sense.

Don’t give up! A big mistake I made in high school was giving up the first time I couldn’t figure out a question because physics was hard and I would never understand it. No excuses! Ignoring a question won’t help you answer it when it comes up on a test. Figure it out on your own or get help.

3. UNIVERSITY PHYSICS (CALCULUS-BASED + LABS)

(Note: Some university physics classes are algebra-based. My university is dumb and forced me to take difficult, calculus-based classes.) 

(Again, most things from part 1 and part 2 apply here as well.)

A) Lectures, studying, finals, etc.

Pay attention in class and write good notes

My physics lectures were boring but trying to catch up by reading my textbook later was so much worse

Your lecture notes may not make much sense at first but later on you’ll be able to tell which concepts were stressed by your prof

Draw any diagrams your prof shows you (or take a picture with your phone if you’re lazy). Be sure that the diagram is complete and don’t forget about labels. Don’t worry too much about neatness as long as you know what the diagram is supposed to show you.

Keep all your notes in one notebook: Use one colour for writing regular notes, another colour for circling formulas or starring things you don’t understand,  and be sure to write the date down for each lecture and leave space if you fall behind during the lecture (you can always copy someone else’s notes later)

Get a good textbook!

Talk to older students and see if the textbook was helpful for the class. If it’s useful then actually use it! If it’s not, find a good textbook to use! 

Do lots of practice questions

My profs tended to go over more conceptual ideas in class and didn’t do many examples.

Try to do a variety of questions! This will tell you if you actually understand the content or if you’ve just memorized how to do certain questions.

Work with other people on assignments (and join/start a group chat for your class)

I had online assignments due every Friday at midnight. My friend and I would meet up on Wednesday or Thursday to work through most of the assignment together. If there was a question we didn’t get, there would always be someone in our class group chat wondering the same thing and there was always some smart physics student that would be a bro and explain how to approach the problem (on another note: don’t leave assignments till the last minute)

Group chats are also great if you miss class or can’t remember when the cutoff for the midterm is

If you don’t understand something get help before it’s too late. 

Be prepared with specific questions. It’s hard for someone to help you if all you can say is that you don’t know anything. Go to your prof, TA, tutor, etc. 

I found my profs to be super nice about everything. They just want people to be excited about the subject they teach!

If you’re just stuck on one thing there are tons of resources online! Just be specific in what you’re googling and check out resources that other profs have posted online.

Understand the math before you start doing questions

Know the basics of derivatives and integrals

It’s super important to be able to draw a rough graph of the first, second, etc. derivative when all you are given is a graph of the original function (i.e. drawing the graphs for velocity and acceleration when given a graph of displacement)

But don’t ignore the conceptual stuff

This is why a good textbook is important!

Plus you can get part marks for some questions by stating whether one value should be higher/lower than another value, even if you can’t figure out the calculations -- and you can check your answers this way.

For example, it’s pretty important to know what magnetic flux density is before you can calculate it’s value

When studying for tests, don’t just assume you know how to do a question.

Looking over the solution for a problem and actually completing the problem are two very different things. This is the biggest mistake I’ve made when studying physics.

Understanding the solution is only one step in actually being able to answer the question. Looking over solutions is lazy studying if you’re not even trying to do the work. Start the question. Glance at the first part of the solution if you’re stuck. Keep going from there.

For first year physics classes, you really shouldn’t skip over any parts of problem. Yeah, rearranging that formula might look easy but can you actually do it? Practice makes perfect.

If you have a midterm coming up that tests material from a few weeks ago, be sure to do questions from the older units. The content might look familiar but just because you could do a question 2 weeks ago doesn’t mean you can do it now.

Don’t leave your studying till the last minute.

Get a planner and carve out enough time to do practice questions every few days. Trying to catch up on four chapter’s worth of problems is not fun and won’t work very well. Plus, you don’t just have to know how to answer questions. You have to be able to answer questions efficiently.

B) Labs

My labs were very different each semester.

First semester content included kinematics, relativity, forces, momentum, work, etc. The labs were super boring but super easy. For most labs we used motion detectors and a program called logger pro to collect and graph data. Lots of carts.

Second semester content included light, energy, radiation, magnetism, circuits, etc. The labs mostly involved bread boards and wires.

Regardless of content, some general comments on labs are...

Labs won’t always follow lecture content. Apparently that’s too difficult to organize.

That said, get your prelabs done. Properly, if you can. If you don’t fully understand a prelab question, ask your TA once you’ve handed it in. This will save you so much time.

Find a good lab partner. Not sure if there’s a trick to this but just try your best. And be a good lab partner too!

Make note of how strict your TA is with sig figs and error calculations. There’s no sense in losing a few marks when you could stay an extra 15 minutes and do the work properly.

Eat some food and hydrate before your lab -- you never know when your lab will take you 3+ hours to finish.

If you’re not sure if your experiment is working ask your TA. Trying to complete the lab with incorrect data is difficult and your TA will probably make you repeat the experiment anyways.

I hope this post was helpful! I struggled with physics in high school (my worst class) but it ended up being one of my best classes in university (A’s both semesters). The content was way more difficult but my studying habits and test-taking methods were what made the difference!!

Feel free to add additional advice to this post!

My Other Posts:

AP lit tips

high school biology

organization tips

recommended reads

reminders for myself

using your time wisely on public transport

what i learned from high school

#physics does not have to be your enemy! #studyblr #physics #quantumheels #briellestudies #areistotle #focusign #academla #intellectus #studybuzz #etudiance #studypetals #studyblrsubjects #mine

[sunshellz-blog1]

three words: last world

Day of choir performance:

Yesterday was my choir performance at the Trinity Episcopal Church! 

The show’s starting time was 7:30, but Vinsun and I planned to meet around 7 at the entrance so I can give him my free ticket. 

While I’m rehearsing, I realize it should almost be 7/almost past 7 and he still hasn’t entered the church. He’s always punctual, so I check my phone because I just knew he must be having trouble finding parking -- and yup, he texted me before 7 that he was having trouble finding parking. So I manage to get off stage during rehearsal and go outside to meet him. Oh jeez, my heart was beating so fast!! Still nervous every time before meeting him. Looking for a bb blue dress shirt, since we chose that outfit together earlier that day. And all of a sudden, I see it! flash of light blue walking towards the church. We fast walk/jog to each other and embrace. My friend from KCCC, Gloria, and her two friends see us and she introduces herself to him, and o boy hahaha is Sunny NOT a talker!! I would say I’m definitely the chatterbug of this relationship. 

I then rush back to rehearsal because I’m not supposed to be out lol, but then shortly after I realize I forgot to give Suns my phone so he can record parts of the choir show!! I text him to meetup again (this time inside the church) and he says “oh shoot. okay, i’ll meet you soon.” Wondering why he’d say “oh shoot,” I find out shortly after he enters the church: he’s holding flowers, and he meant to surprise me after the performance! Old white lady next to us called him out on it haha! But it made me like the flowers and him even more -- the whole scenario made me laugh. 

Showtime! I’m up onstage, and shortly before my choir and I start to sing, I see Vinsun carrying my camera, recording us vertically... so I try to gesture him to change the orientation to landscape repeatedly until he finally does. Oh my! HAHA. So cute. He records us the entire time, and in my head while singing, I felt bad because I wanted him to enjoy at least some of the parts without having to record us! I should’ve mentioned that even just one song would suffice. But he got every single song, and there were probably 6+. Oh, gramps. 

Anyway, afterward, he meets some of my other friends/acquaintances, and we finally take our first picture every together!! :) After our mini photoshoot, we walk towards his car, and I ask if he wanted to have “the talk” (something he’s been waiting to tell me for so long, but apparently had trouble opening up about. I got my first anxiety attack when he mentioned he had something to tell me that might hurt me through text. He reassured me though that it didn’t have to do with us breaking up or anything, so I held my nerves until this day.) However, he apologized and said he didn’t feel comfortable talking about it at the moment... I was so curious at that point, almost wanted to push him into telling me, but tried to understand and said we can just chill in the car and think of something else to do. So once inside the car, his stomach growls (hahaha), and I realize I’m super hungry too... So we yelp side by side, having trouble finding something to eat, and just talk for a bit while doing so. Then we look at each other. And then, of course, kiss. 

He decides he doesn’t feel like eating anymore and would rather cuddle at the backseat of his car, and so I laugh and we get out of the front seats to meet at the back. We sit side by side and look into each other’s eyes. He keeps whispering “you look so beautiful...” and then as things get a lil’ more hawt... transitions to comments like “how are you so effin’ hot” LOL! Well, without the censorship. I kiss him and tell him how attractive he is to me too, because dayum. I get more attracted to him every time I see him. :) 

Didn’t have sex**

And then our stomachs keep growling..... lol, so we just pick the nearest available sushi restaurant “Edomasa,” basically the only late night sushi bar available in state street. As we sit there and eat, we talk about things like our parents’ personalities, our dreams as kids, and our dreams currently. We both agree maybe someday we can live in the middle of nowhere, since there a lot of physician jobs available that give good incentive to do so, and as for me, I just always wanted to live somewhere random for a bit with someone special.

After the restaurant, we drive to my apartment in Isla Vista to watch a scary movie together downstairs! He’s never been inside before, so I was pretty darn excited. Also, just excited to be with him.

However, turns out my roommate and her friends/my club fam were pre-gaming there since it was a Friday night. So Sunny and I back away from all the loudness inside and walk around Isla Vista instead. He sees the all the little food places I would talk about when we were texting ~ He said he found the concept of seeing in person the things I would talk about with him interesting. LDR (we’re blessed right now though... imagine when he goes to Vegas. :()

We pass by the random nature park area that I sent pictures of before -- it’s a really pretty route that I always take to the nearby food cooperative for groceries. It has trees everywhere, tall grass, a little river, and a mini red barn/windmill-looking object. Nearby, there’s a tree and a bench underneath it. We sit there for a moment and just talk about our past, and how we’re each other’s first loves, and how I’m his first girlfriend. After awhile, I ask him about the “thing” he’s been wanting to tell me all this time, and he would try but it wouldn’t come out... So I kept guessing. My guesses to what this secret was about (other than the first guess of him breaking up with me, but he reassured me that it wasn’t that at all):

him:

- having leukemia 

- being infertile 

- dropping out of med school (which wasn’t going to be a dealbreaker though at this point or anything) 

... and then he said it was a “physical” matter, not an abstract one/action, so:

him having:

- an extra toe

- a growing tailbone 

- a third nipple

- both male and female genitals 

- baldness 

- a hole somewhere in his body

- webbed feet 

He kept saying it has nothing to do with him growing something external, but I just couldn’t think of something physical about him that would be so “scare-worthy.” I admit, I kept saying before that I respected his privacy and wanted him to share when he was comfortable. But at that point, I just knew I would overthink it and not stop being able to guess the worst things possible until he told me. 

And then I felt his arms. And asked, “oh, does it have to do with your arms? This is the only body part I didn’t ask about.” 

So FINALLY, after an hour or so of this, he said, “fuck it, I’m just going to say it.” And then he told me. My reaction was literally, “Oh.. that’s it?” 

Even though no one reads this blog, I want to secure his privacy in this matter since it’s really personal to him. But basically, it’s a light skin condition that most people have. My sister and I both had it growing up, and it faded off with diet and healthy habits. Nbd. Him opening up about it made me love him even more. 

Okay, so around midnight or 1 am, we walk back to my place, and hey ~ everyone’s gone! The pre-gamers have gone out to party and whatnot, while upstairs everyone else was asleep. So we had my living room to ourselves, where we set up a scary Korean movie “Muoi.” However, of course, we end up getting very distracted by each other and kiss haha. A bit later, I relax on his lap as he sort of plays with my hair. I look up at him, and he looks at me too.. and says, “I love you.” 

Ahhhhhhhh..... I asked him, “Wait, what did you say?” And he said it again. I can’t describe how I felt at that moment.. But it was a mixture of excitement/disbelief/relief/pure happiness/gratefulness. I knew we implied it through text all the time, but hearing it then at that moment and in person for the first time was definitely something so special to me.. I told him I loved him back, and we kissed. :) 

Ahh. Didn’t want him to leave, I was falling asleep on him. But he had to drive an hour or so back to Lompoc.. So we said our goodbyes outside my house. Wasn’t going to be seeing him for another week. 

But it was a beautiful night :) 

#three words

[beautiful-liu]

Chapter 22 - Remember me - Kryber

Title: Remember me

Pairing: Kryber [Amber Liu x Krystal Jung] Fandom: f(x) Genre: Drama, romance

Summary: The bad ass androgynous girl Amber Josephine Liu with a sex, drugs and rock-‘n-roll attitude whom everybody seemed to fear and admire at the same time, with the flash of a smug smile on her handsome face, and a sigaret or lolly pop in her mouth, depending on her mood. A leather jacket always hugging her shoulders, ripped jeans and a loose tank top that displayed just a tiny bit of her sports bra when she lifted her tattoo-filled arms. Everyone was weak for Amber Liu. Krystal simply didn’t see it. Until that one night she accidentally met her, and met a whole other person than the stories she had been made to believe. Word count: 5900 Rating: T A/N: Excuse the grammar mistakes. This is my first time writing a multi chaptered fic. Hope y'all enjoy the progress!

Read it on: AO3 & asianfanfics

Moodboard: x

For the following days, Krystal's smile couldn't be whiped off of her face. Now that she had finally made up her mind and set up a new goal to achieve, she felt a lot less restless. In fact, she almost felt happy. Of course, they were gonna go through a rough time, since she and Amber had to convince her father to still give her the company, despite the fact that she didn't want to marry Kai. And on top of that, she also had to break up with the man she had been together for years. Both men were defenitely not going to like it. But Krystal has been opressed by men all of her life and she was done with the endless rules for women to maintain made up by boring, old, wealthy, white men in power. She wanted to live her life like she wanted to. As CEO with Amber by her side. That's what she wanted and that was what she was going to achieve. When she had returned home, late that evening, Kai had waited for her. Krystal had hoped he would've gone to bed already, but it had been in vain. Even though it was almost one o'clock, Kai was still up. "I thought you were sick," he muttered, when Krystal closed the door. When she took off her coat and hung it up, she realized with a shock that she still wore Amber's R2-D2 sweater. Quickly she crossed her arms in front of her chest to hide the funny Star Wars character, hoping Kai wouldn't notice. He wasn't such a film junkie, so if she was lucky, he didn't even know R2-D2 was part of Star Wars. But would he recognize it as a sweater that wasn't hers? It didn't exactly fit in her wardrobe... "I was, but I felt better, so I went for a walk.." she mutterd. Kai raised one of his eyebrows. "A walk that lasts more than 5 hours? Kind of much, don't you think, after being sick for two days?" he asked. Krystal pressed her lips together and took her time to answer. "Well, I rested in between, you know... took a seat in the café nearby," she muttered. "I just needed some time alone." "Some time away from me?" he asked immediately, whilst turning his face towards the TV again. Krystal's eyes shot open. "N-no, of course not," she tried to say as casually as possible. She chuckled awkwardly. "I know you, Krystal Jung. If you don't want to be around anyone, you come home. The only reason why you would flight from our apartment is because of me." Krystal fell silent. Kai looked up at her and smiled weakly. She couldn't smile back, just stare. "And I think I know why," he said, as he stood up. Kai walked towards her and Krystal was suddenly aware how much taller he was than her. She had always thought of his height as attractive, but with only the TV to light the room, it made him look creepy. A chill ran down her spine. "Two days ago, you know, when we were... you, know, having sex. You really, really don't have to feel guilty that it didn't work. I had a great time, I always have a great time with you, no matter what," he said. Krystal opened her mouth to object — because he was thinking in such a wrong direction — but prevented herself from saying anything. Maybe it was better to just let him talk and live in a delusion than to break it to him now that he was probably the last person she wanted to have sex with. "You really don't have to feel guilty, Krystal. You're not broken and it's not weird. I have read about it online, you know, there are a lot of women who have diffeculty with.. you know, getting turned on." Krystal closed her mouth again and sighed. "I know I am not broken..." she said softly. She knew she wasn't and that she had no problem getting aroused either. Kai simply wasn't the right person. Krystal had always had that habit of only wanting sexual activity with a person she was in love with; she couldn't just jump on any man or woman just because she felt like having sex. And even though she trusted Kai, she couldn't get herself to think of him sexually. She had to be in love or it simply didn't work. And Amber made her feel everything she ever wanted to feel, whilst Kai was only just safe. He was home. His smell, his arms around her, his low voice. He was everything that made her feel safe. But Krystal didn't want to feel safe. She wanted those butterflies in her stomach and her heart pumping adrenaline through her body. She wanted her heart to make extra hours and her mind dazed, not being able to concentrate on anything when the other is so close. She felt like that around Amber, even though they hadn't seen each other for such a long time. Perhaps true love never dies. "-so never think any less of yourself. You please me enough not to want anyone else." Krystal jerked her head up, realizing that she had missed more than half of the speech Kai had been giving her. Supressing a sour expression, she nodded and showed a weak smile. Oh, if only you wanted someone else too... In the following weeks, Krystal led a secretive life, switching from her role as CEO to the accommodating, quiet fiancée to the adventurous lover. Her days consisted of going to work, seeing Amber at lunch — either because she brought her home made sandwiches or took her out for lunch if Krystal's scedule wasn't packed, which if often was — and quickly after work, going home to Kai, get dinner and quickly get to bed. Sometimes she made an excuse that she had a late meeting, so that she could see Amber. Her father often had ones too and it wasn't uncommon for a new business partner to only be available at moments which were either early in the morning or after normal working hours. Jung Internationals was trying to scedule Song Software to join them, but it was hard since the CEO was a stately woman with a straight back, an emotionless beautiful face and deep, dark eyes that looked like every single emotion had been sucked out of them. Krystal had been trained in keeping her emotions under control but this Victoria took it to a whole new level. She was a hard nut to crack and she tried to get everything out of the deal. But Krystal wouldn't be herself if she wouldn't try the same. So the two women kept battling. Kai was aware of the trouble with recruiting Song Software, so he never asked a single thing when she returned around midnight, tired out. And she didn't even need to lie. All the meetings with Victoria Song happened in the afternoon, so whatever happened at the meeting, she told Kai after she returned from her "meeting". On weekends, Krystal was forced to spend more time with her fiancée. And sometimes that just consisted of them going out for dinner or meeting up with his parents. That wasn't so bad. During the dinners she almost forgot that she was supposed to dump him soon. She remembered why she had agreed upon dating him in the first place. Kai wasn't the worst person to be around, and he still was her best friend. They had a lot of fun together. But as soon as the laughter died out, her heart started to yearn for Amber again. More often than not, she told Kai that she would meet up for Jessica for a girls' day out — and Kai being the typical man that he is, wouldn't dare to join them — whilst in fact she went to Amber. Krystal was stuck in a string of lies that kept going on and on and she knew she would have to stop sooner rather than later because the concequences would be even uglier if she was caught lying instead of admitting it. "So, who're shall I tell first? Dad or Kai?" Amber rose her eyebrows. "So you're gonna tell them?" she asked. Krystal pressed her body tighter to Amber's. The long lounge sofa had become their favorite spot to cuddle, especially on rainy, late Sunday afternoons. With the pillows from Amber's bed and a few blankets, they were nice and cozy at all times while they talked through things. "I think it's for the best. Better do it sooner rather than later, right?" Amber looked down to her and nodded, smiling approvingly. "Are you nervous?" she asked. Krystal let a long sigh escape from her lips. "Tell me something... Every time I try to make up a good conversation starter to break the ice, I panic and feel like throwing up," she muttered. Amber wrapped her arms around her body and pulled her closer, so Krystal could lay her head upon her shoulder. "You're overthinking again." "I am not." "Oh you definitely are. I never make up conversation starters in my head when I approach people. I just do it and don't think," Amber said proudly. The brunette rolled her eyes. "Yeah, okay, but maybe it's handy to have like a strategy here because my father isn't some kind of random person who is charmed by my looks. He is going to want valid arguments, but I literally have none." "You are in love," Amber said, with a short shrug. "Yeah, that's exactly the reason dad wouldn't want to hear. He always told me that emotions cloud judgement and that love makes one weaker when it comes to getting the job done. A CEO should be completely focused on their job, bla-bla-bla, all that crap. Being in love would just mean that I have to get over my feelings and do what's right for the company and the family." Amber thought for a moment. "Then wouldn't it be wise to first secure your position as CEO, so that you don't have to get permission from your father anymore and just take over Jung Internationals?" Krystal let out a sound that was best described as a mix of a snicker and a sigh. "I'm getting Jung Internationals, my official title as CEO, as a wedding gift. And well, I am not going to marry Kai. That's the whole problem. So, who do you think I should approach first? Dad or Kai?" Amber sighed and rubbed with her fingers in her eyes. Krystal understood the feeling, she herself was getting a headache too. "Shall we just toss a coin? I mean, it’s gonna suck either way." Krystal chuckled and nodded. “I suppose you’re right. It’s gonna suck” She had chosen Kai. Eventually, they had both agreed to tell Kai first, since the wedding was coming up rather soon and she needed to blow it off before anything bad could happen. They already lost lots of money to the preparations, but Krystal couldn’t care less. Money was one of the things that mattered the least at the moment. Krystal had also chosen him first because she reckoned he would be the one who would take the news the best. Perhaps his mind would settle now too, since he finally had an answer to Krystal’s absentmindedness over last couple of weeks. Not to mention her overall unwillingness to be intimate with him. But telling Kai, her best friend for the past four years, was still tricky. He was bad in controlling his temper and Krystal knew for sure that there was going to be a fight. Nevertheless, she knew he’d never hurt her. He loved her too much for that. That didn’t take away her anxiousness though, she was still scared to death for his reaction. Krystal had never been able to take screaming people very well. They let a week pass, so they could prepare. “Do I need to go with you inside?” Amber asked her, when she dropped her off at her apartment building. Krystal smiled, kissed her cheek and shook her head. “This is something I really need to do alone, but I appreciate the offer.” “Then shall I wait for you here outside? If something goes wrong then you can-“ Krystal chuckled softly and shook her head again. “It’s going to be okay, I’m going to be fine. Go home, I’ll call you when he has settled down, okay?” Amber simply sighed dramatically and nodded. They kissed a final time before Krystal got out of Amber’s car and walked back home. Once she stood in the elevator, she didn’t feel that calm anymore. Her belly was tickling of nervousness and it made her sick to her stomach. Knowing that she would break Kai’s heart in a matter of minutes was hard to wrap your head around. In a few moments she would lose her best friend… But her mind was clear; the decision made; she would do it, no matter what. Finally, it was time to make her own happiness a priority. Krystal was painfully aware of her body and all the small movements it made. As soon as the doors of the elevator opened, she walked towards her own front door, aware of her own weight pressuring the floor beneath her. Slowly, she took out her keys, sought the right one, turned the lock and entered her apartment. As expected, Kai was waiting for her. Previously, they had decided to grab dinner with the two of them again. Not something fancy, just take out. Since Krystal's busy life as a cheater, she hadn't been able to spend much time with Kai anymore. She was either at work or as much as she could without making it look suspicious with Amber. He had also noticed that and had proposed a simple get together, just some pizza and a movie. It was a bit strange because Kai normally didn't eat fatty food, nor did she, and he wasn't a movie-person. Yet she had told him she would clear some time off of her scedule, mainly because she wanted this Saturday evening to be the night she would tell him. The pizza was still steaming hot. She had probably just missed the courier. Kai was already scrolling through their Netflix account that both of them barely used, looking for a movie he wouldn't end up watching either way. When she entered the apartment, he looked up, smiling brightly. Her fiancée got up from the couch and walked over to her to place a kiss on her cheek. With a weak smile she received it. "You already ordered?" she asked as she peeked over his shoulder to the two carton boxes on their coffee table. Kai shrugged. "I reckoned it'd arrive when you would, so we could eat immediately. I ordered your favorite, with paprikas and champignons." Krystal smiled at him and nodded. "Let me just change into something more comfertable," she said, as she signed towards the dress she was wearing. He laughed softly and nodded. "Don't make it too long, the pizza will grow cold." Krystal quickly hopped into their bedroom to take off her dress. Quickly she changed into her jogging pants and a loose t-shirt. It didn't happen often that Krystal Jung was found in her comfertable clothes. If she wasn't wearing her formal clothes, she still wore a blouse and tight jeans. Jogging pants were almost always out of question. She returned towards the living room. The smell of pizza made her belly growl, but she told herself that she probably wouldn't be eating pizza tonight. Kai's eyebrows shot up in surprise when he saw her. Krystal's eyes shifted to the TV. "I thought we could maybe start a show together. I'm not much of a rom-com kind of person but I know you like these things so..." Kai said when he saw her look. The screen showed a show called 'You Me Her'. Krystal pressed her lips tightly upon each other. "Kai... I can't," she muttered. Kai looked up. "Do you not like this show? We can always watch something else or-" "No. It's not the movie. Or the pizza. Or you. I simply can't." Kai frowned confusedly. "You can't do what?" "Be with you," she forced out of her mouth. Her voice had turned hoarse now that she had to set more volume to it. The words felt like knives in her throat, scarring up her insides on their way out. Kai chuckled nervously. "Krystal, what do you mean?" She sighed and ran with her hand through her hair. With a heavy heart, she sat down next to him on the couch. She took his hands into hers. "I.. I need to tell you something... And I have been wanting to tell you this for quite a while. And I know you will be angry when you hear what I want to tell you." Kai took his hands back and stared at her in disbelief. "What is it, Krystal?" he demanded. She took a deep breath, pointed her eyes at the ground and bit down on her lip hard. Kai asked again but she barely heard it. "I have been having an affair." There was a silence. She didn't dare to look up to him, afraid for the expression on his face. Krystal fixated her gaze on a certain spot on the floor. "With who?" it eventually sounded. Kai seemed way too calm to be okay and it scared her for what was about to come. Krystal bit down on her lip. "Amber Liu." This time, the silence endured longer than the one before. Much longer. A minute, maybe two passed before he said anything. "The party..." he only muttered. "You have been... since the party?" Krystal formed fists with her hand when she nodded. Suddenly, Kai stood up from the couch and walked away. Krystal's head jerked up. She saw how Kai had walked towards the kitchen counter. He placed his hands upon the edge, his head hung low. She could see his muscles underneath his blouse tighten every time he breathed shakily. Krystal wanted to get up to reassure him, to help him, to comfort him, but before she could, Kai looked back to her. His gaze burned right through her façade to her soul. His eyes had darkened dangerously and when Krystal returned his look, she could feel all of his anger vibrating off of him. With his hair down, casting a shadow over his face, he looked more like a devil than ever. He formed fists with his hands. Krystal widened her eyes startled. Even though he didn’t say anything, she hadn’t seen him so angry ever before. “Tell me this is a lie, Krystal,” he hissed, his voice low and dangerous. Krystal was completely dumb-found. “I-I..” she stuttered. She had a hard job to control the growing bubble of panic in her belly. With every heartbeat it seemed to get worse. “TELL ME IT’S A LIE!” Kai bellowed. Tears started to leak out of her eyes. “I can’t..” she sniffled. Her fiancée stared at her with a strange expression, as if he couldn’t believe his eyes. Krystal looked away and pulled her legs up on the couch. “I love her, Kai.. I always have and I thought I had gotten over her but-“ “You thought,” Kai spat towards her, as if the words tasted like poison on her tongue. Krystal cringed at his tone. “You thought you had fallen out of love. You thought it’d be a good idea to date me instead. You thought you wouldn’t fall in love again but you did,”he growled. “Is that what you thought, Krystal?” She nodded, tears streaming over her face. Yes.. yes she had indeed thought all of that. She had wanted it to be true, it’d be so much easier if her feelings for Kai were just true.. But they weren’t. Kai huffed. His fist connected with the fridge, making a hollow sound fill the room. He didn’t even flinch at the pain. “How could you do that to me? Don’t you know I’d do everything for you?” he screamed at her. “I love you!” Krystal sniffled and tried to wipe her tears away. New ones simply replaced the old ones. “I can’t control my own heart, Kai,” she tried, but Kai shook his head. “No, loving someone is not something you cannot influence. You could’ve just stopped seeing her! You could’ve cut her off and done what’s best for yourself, for us!” “But I can’t… I have done that all of my life, Kai,” she sobbed desperately. “I can’t do that anymore or I’d kill myself. I can’t live like that anymore. I need someone-“ “YOU HAVE ME!” “But that’s not enough! I need Amber, Kai. I need her otherwise I won’t survive.” They were both breathing hard and fast, staring at each other in utter helplessness. “So now you’re telling me you want to be with her instead? That low-classed, rude, scruffy-looking, filthy lesb-“ “Don’t call her that,” Krystal warned. She was surprised by the sureness in her voice. Even though her eyes were still wet and her body was still shaking, her mind was clear and she wouldn’t want Kai to ever speak of Amber like that. But he just laughed. He laughed at her. “And why the hell not? Is she not the fucking lesbian that stole my fiancée? She did something to you, right? Did she touch you? She fucking touched you, did she not? Nowadays everyone is a damned lesbian and now they stole you too. If I ever see her again-“ “The only one who touched me against my will was you, Kai!” Krystal screamed back. This seemed to take him back a bit. He stared at her, with wide eyes. For a moment, a silence settled between them, that was only broken by Krystal’s panting. “Take that back,” he eventually demanded. “Take that back, Krystal. I always asked you, you always wanted to.” Krystal showed him a weak smile. “I never wanted to.” Kai’s face went blank. “And you do want to with her?” he asked. Krystal nodded and sighed. She wiped the tears off of her face and she ran with her hand through her hair. Krystal bit down hard on her lip. “I’m out.” Kai had already turned around when Krystal’s head shot up. He walked over to the door, grabbed his coat and his shoes, putting them on swiftly. “No, Kai, wait-“ “There is no need, Krystal. I know when I’m not wanted,” he barked at her, before closing the front door with a bang behind him. Krystal flinched at the sound. With a sigh, she let herself fall back onto the couch and curled herself up in a small ball; she was still shaking. The smell of pizza had worn off and so had the hunger in her belly. Instead an empty feeling washed over her. Almost an hour later, she remembered that she had promised to call Amber after the fight was over. By now, her tears had dried up and the hungry feeling had returned. She had eaten a few slices, after warming the pizza up again – it had grown cold in the meantime. She typed in Amber’s number, since she knew it by heart, and pressed the phone against her ear. The device rang a few times, before it got picked up. “Hey..” Amber muttered, at the other side of the line. Her voice was hoarse. “Hey, the fight’s over. Ah well, it ended a while ago, I just forgot to call,” she said. Amber made a ‘hmm’-sound. “How did it go?” “It sucked. Kai left and he won’t pick up his phone, though. I don’t know where he is.” “He probably… need to cool down a bit..” Amber replied. “I suppose so. Don’t all men need to? Either way, shall I come over? I’m really in need for a hug right now.” “Ehm, I don’t think that’s a good idea.” Krystal frowned. “What? Why not?” Amber let a nervous chuckle escape her mouth. “You know, I’m working and such. It’s better if you’re not there. I’d get embarrassed, you know-“ she quickly said. “No, I can just wait? Prepare us a meal? Watch a movie? I won’t bother you,” she said. Amber cleared her throat. Her voice turned normal again, but it still seemed like it hurt her to talk. “Really, Krystal, believe me, it’s better if-“ “I’m coming over right now, bye!” Krystal said, before ending the call abruptly. She took her coat and shoes – didn’t even bother to change – and walked out of the apartment. Krystal immediately raced off in her car. It took her only ten minutes to get from her apartment to Amber's, even though it was a 20 minute drive. When she had called her, Amber's voice had sounded so unsettling, as if she wanted to hide something. Krystal couldn't help herself to immediately think that there was something wrong. Perhaps she was back with Luna and that was why she didn't want her to come over. When people cheated, didn't they usually use the lie of having to work, whilst they in reality spent time with their lover? Krystal herself had done that too. It wouldn't even surprise her. Luna was the ultimate girlfriend. She was caring and bubbly, lovable and had a spicy edge. She dared to open her mouth and didn't have diffecult family to deal with. She was Amber's collegue so they spent a lot of time together, especially when Amber was working on new songs for Luna's album. She was pretty and well-known with a good sum of money to her name. Luna was the perfect girlfriend. Krystal parked her car swiftly in front of Amber's apartment building. Her heart was racing in her chest. Even though she was burning to find out what was wrong with Amber, she was also very afraid. Maybe... maybe it indeed was Luna. Would she even want to know if it was Luna? She broke up with Kai, there was nothing to go back to now. If Amber was having an affair with Luna too, then she had sacrificed everything for nothing. The elevator ride seemed to last forever. Once the doors opened, Krystal almost ran outside. She just had enough dignity left to keep it on walking fastly. The door to Amber's apartment was closed, which was unusual. Whenever Amber was home, she let the front door open for her. Awkwardly, she rang the bell. Krystal wrapped her arms around her body while she was waiting. Her teeth caught her lower lip between them. Eventually, the door slowly opened.. Krystal looked up, for a moment unable to breathe. Krystal placed her hand in front of her mouth that had fallen open. "What happened to your face...?!" she breathed in horror. Amber groaned and let her into the apartment. She couldn't stop looking at her face, still with a horrid expression on her face. "Dear God..." Amber's face looked terrible. Her right eye had turned sickly purple. The whole skin around it was swollen, causing her right eye to be almost swollen shut. Her lip was bloody and the wound was still open. There was dried up blood underneath her nose. "I told you not to come..." Amber muttered, as she rubbed the back of her head. Krystal slowly let her hand fall. "Well obviously it was the right choice. Who the heck did this to you?" she demanded. Amber let herself fall on her couch and groaned of pain when she buried her face in the pillows. She murmured something which Krystal couldn't understand, but it sounded a lot like... "Kai?" "Yes... Your fiancée..." Amber muttered, as she looked up from the pillows. Krystal sat down next to her and helped her to sit up right. She growned; obviously her whole body hurted. "Did you know he took lessons in karate? Because I found out as soon as he started," Amber murmered bitterly. Krystal bit her lip. "I knew he took lessons as a kid but I didn't know he was this good... oh Amber, I'm so sorry... I didn't know he'd do somehing like that," Krystal said softly. It took a lot of power and skills to overpower Amber Josephine Liu. Krystal knew all about her past and she knew Amber had some skills in street fighting. Kai must've either taken by surprise or really, really hit her hard. Even though Amber knew how to fight, she was still a woman and women had less muscles than men. Especially because Kai almost daily worked out in the gym and took extra supplies to build muscle mass. Amber sighed. "It's not your fault." Krystal lifted her hand to lightly touch Amber's eye. At first, the other woman tried to turn away, but seemed to realize that Krystal wouldn't hurt her and let her touch the sore spot. Nevertheless, she gritted her teeth when Krystal let the tip of her finger trail over the sensitive skin. "It is... I should have never let him get out of the apartment," she muttered. Amber shook her head. "He needed something to distract him, someone to blame for what has happened. I suppose I could've seen this coming. Gotta admit I still don't like it that he messed up my face though," Amber sighed. "Could you perhaps get me some of that bruise paste I have in my bathroom. I used to have a blue eye ninety percent of the time in college so I kept the tube." "Y-yes of course!" Krystal immediately blurted out. She ran towards the bathroom and sought for the tube. It took her a few minutes but eventually she returned. She put some on her finger and started to apply it on Amber's face. She groaned softly, but the longer Krystal went on, the more her moans turned into sighs. The paste relieved some of the pain, it was probably numbing. "You should go after him, you know, talk things through... so my other eye won't turn out blue as well," Amber said. Krystal sighed and nodded. "It didn't turn out as smooth as I thought it would... he got very angry," she sighed. Tiredness suddenly washed over her and she finally felt how much energy the fight had drained from her. Amber's gaze softened and she pulled Krystal in a hug. "Can't I stay here for tonight? I don't want to go home.." Amber planted a kiss on her head and nodded. "You can stay as long as you like." Krystal sighed and nodded. She let her head rest against Amber's shoulder and let her be hugged. Later that evening, when Krystal had already fallen asleep on the couch a couple of times, Amber carried her to bed. Woken up by the sudden change of room, she let Amber tuck her in. She couldn't help to watch her when she undressed. Amber – being under the impression that she was already asleep again – didn't notice her gaze wandering over her body when she took off her shirt. Seeing the fresh bruises on her ribcase as well, Krystal bit her lip hard. With every move she made, Amber seemed to groan of pain. She wondered how she ever could've carried her to the bedroom... Amber put on another shirt, but the bruises seemed to almost light up underneath the fabric now that Krystal had seen them and knew they were there. The fact that Amber hadn't showed them to her when she was treating her with the bruise paste made her realize that Amber was probably a bit ashamed that she hadn't been able to stop Kai when he had leaped at her. It saddened her that she tried to keep that hidden from her. That's why she turned around to face her as soon as Amber got in the bed. The other girl shuddered. "You startled me! I thought you were sleeping already," Amber exclaimed. Her face immediately turned guilty, knowing all too well that she had been caught. Krystal nudged closer to her and let her fingers trail towards the edge of her shirt, slowly lifting it up. "Can I see?" she asked softly. Amber sighed and nodded. Krystal prepped herself up on one elbow and lifted Amber's shirt with the other. When she exposed the bruises again, she couldn't help but sigh. "I didn't want to concern you.." Amber muttered. Krystal turned her eyes away from the bruises and into her eyes. She smiled weakly. "Could you please don't lie to me... after all that has happened, eight years ago, I can't-" "I'm sorry," Amber immediately said. Krystal nodded, her smile slowly faltering. The other girl took her closer, pressing a kiss on her lips. And suddenly, a great need of wanting to kiss her washed over her when their lips collided for a second. Amber had just pecked her lips, but Krystal came back wanting more. She kissed Amber softly and she immediately got the hint. Kissing her like that felt like kissing clouds; her lips so soft; her scent clouding her mind. Krystal was careful enough not to place her hands anywhere near her hips in case of hurting her, but kept them cupped around her cheek. Amber kissed her back lovingly. There was nothing sexual to the kiss because they knew that tonight would be very inconvenient. They didn't want to turn tonight about sex. They just wanted each other and each other's love. That's what they wanted and that's what they got. The kiss made Krystal feel like the world was right at her feet. And when they broke up and snuggled against each other, Krystal spooned Amber. Usually, she was the little spoon, mostly because she was tinier than Amber and she was the less progressive one. But now that Amber was hurting, she wanted to give her the same feeling Amber always gave her when they slept together: the feeling of secureness in the other's arms. So, as soft as she could, Krystal placed her arm around her body. With a sigh, she placed her head on the pillow. Her eyes fell shut immediately. But there was still a single thought left clouding her mind, keeping her from falling asleep immediately. "Amber... I love you," she muttered. She felt Amber stir for a moment. "I should've said that eight years ago and I was stupid that I waited too long. I want you to know now. If something happens in the days to follow, then you at least know." Amber let out a little chuckle. "I love you too, Krystal. Don't ever forget that."

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