9th grade me be like *plays dumb about Yugoslavia so my history teacher would have to explain & compliment leftist ideology*
“Tomoyo-hime will be delighted.” Fai echoed his thought from earlier before he started nibbling down his neck. As nice as that was–Kurogane tugged playfully at his hair to get some eye contact. Ether Fai was really laying the act on think or Kurogane was being dense as to the real reason he was so fucking cuddly int he middle of the kitchen like this.
“You need a snack or something?” Blondie leaned back a bit to flash him a toothy grin.
As hard as the vampire shit had been on them–Kurogane fucking melted at that goofy grin complete with fangs. Fai being at ease with his vampiric instincts on display just showed how far they had come since acid Tokyo and it just… fucked with him in the best kinda way.
“No–I just like you lots.” Fai punctuated those words with a wink and Kurogane found himself grinning as he pulled his mage in for a proper kiss.
I just opened my phone to a bunch of people liking/rebooting my post and some new people following me and I am overwhelmed, thank you and welcome to Zee’s shit show
you are alone.
you are alone. the awareness spreads— a bleak cloud, a weighty mass hanging over his head. threatening to reach down and suffocate him. always hovering at the corner of his eye— he is never not aware of it, as is natural, since desolation is not something you run away from.
the lonely, the alienated, they know there’s no escape. you can’t run from something that lives inside your bones. from thoughts that haunt you from inside your own head.
you are alone and alone and alone and nobody really knows you. nobody knows. the loneliness knows you though. it knows you. it knows of all the times you spent staring at the ceiling, as the sun set, as the sun rose again. it knows all the hours spent under the blaze of water at the highest settling in your shower, hours watching the water swirl down the drain in-between your feet while your hands, your hands tried to forget the ghost-memory of blood dripping, dripping down your fingers like tar. nails etched themselves against the tiles.
that blood. it never l e f t you.
does it hurt worse because you had the chance to be more—? the chance to become…… part of an us. an our. a together. a potential two in place of the zero he is now and was, even back then. friends. they were friends, weren’t they? for such a short time. for such a short amount of time, but they were friends.
he didn’t allow himself to be more, for all that he could see she wanted to be more. but those were just the…… the fictitious dream of having the perfect kakashi as a boyfriend— why did so many girls think like that? rin too, at the academy, had those thoughts. he didn’t get it.
but what she felt for him, that was more of a love for an ideal than a love for him as a person. he didn’t think much on it, honestly.
she didn’t try to force things. just, looked at him. he wasn’t as ignorant as to mistake the longing that appeared in those eyes. but it wasn’t love. not really. her friendship he could take, for it came with no requirements. but he couldn’t commit to something more, that asked for so much of him ( he didn’t know how to give what her eyes asked for— ). perhaps he should have.
his mind keeps tracing back his steps.
wondering where the most fatal one was taken.
does it hurt worse because you were steps away from opening yourself to her, or are you deluded? have the years washed away the gritty details? have the years n u m b e d down the truth of her memory?
she never deserved to sort through the mess that was his psyche. what made him think she deserved that disappointment? he was a failure. he was trash. he was way less than that. why did his mind always turn back to that time and hope for impossible things………. why did he always try and make himself into a better person than he really is………. even if she offered— rin - thoughtful - protective - caring - rin— and she kept offering, didn’t she?
kakashi, you can talk to me.
kakashi, are you okay ?
kakashi, please, let me help you.
ka ka shi .
k a k a s h i .
why did he entertain the possibility. was he truly that lonely. wondering what it would be like, if he had been in love with a girl dead for over twelve years. wondering if it was just safer for his subconscious to latch onto such a far-fetched concept, than to contemplate pursuing a real relationship with someone in the present. in the now. alive.
yes. certainly. dead people had no way to hurt him. not more than they a l r e a d y had.
the cloying loneliness that lived in his chest wasn’t going to be satisfied with fantasies about the future he could have had in a different reality, one where he made the right choices— but he wasn’t emotionally prepared to take the risk. of sharing his inner self with someone real. with falling for someone real. the stakes were too high.
nobody knows you.
nor will ever know you.
get used to it.
Are the characters the ones that are touch starved… or is it the taxy?
Hi I have an intense need for every single character in Eyeshield 21 to get some affection or at least attention and I know I’m gonna have to do a lot of it myself so enjoy this dump of the Hah Hah brothers, Sena, and Hiruma
tagged by @robot-witch
Rules: describe yourself with 10 pics you already have - No downloading new ones!
Thank you for the tag Hayley! I shall use it to fight quarantine boredom! I definitely dont have that many pictures I didn’t take on my phone but I shall do my best. Probably a lot of screenshots.
Edit: I failed with screen shots and added photos that I took… Oops…. But anyways they each feel like an important part of me.
Writers, Have You Ever:
Rules: Tag the person who tagged you, then bold the things in the list which you have written.
Nobody tagged, I just felt like procrastinating my writing.
A complete story
A story longer than 1K
A story longer than 5K
A story longer than 10K
A story longer than 50K
A story longer than 100K
A story longer than 150K
A story shorter than 1K
A story shorter than 500 words
A story in the Romance Genre
A Story With No Speculative Elements At All
A children’s book
A story about vampires
A story about werewolves
A story about robots
A story with a non-human protagonist
A story with a main character based on yourself
A story with a character based on somebody you know
A POV character a different gender from yourself
POV character under age 15
POV character over age 30
A story told in non-chronological order
Story with a happy ending
Story with a sad ending
Death of a minor character
Death of a major character
Villain gets a redemption arc
Sex scene (offscreen)
Sex scene (onscreen)
Violence (PG or under)
Violence (PG-13 or over)
A dream sequence
A scene that made you cry actual tears
A scene that made you laugh at your own joke
A story with more than 30 chapters
A chapter with fewer than 100 words
Story that takes place in the future
Story that takes place in the past
Story that takes place in a world that is not Earth
Description of male character’s scent
Description of female character’s boobs
Character with eyes of a non-natural color
It’s been a huge inspiration to me creatively. I started drawing more AND started writing fanfic again. (I hadn’t written a fic for like 13 years at that point.) The Ame/dot relationship especially played a big role in rekindling my interest in making fan content.
On a much more personal level, the show taught me to love myself more. Seeing a tall, plus sized woman such as Rose being portrayed as beautiful made me feel more at peace with my size. And the show, along with all the other LGBT representation that’s out there in the media these days, has made me feel more comfortable with my own bisexuality. Because of this, SU is always going to have a special place in my heart.
5:A song that needs to be played LOUD
I’m Yer Dad by GRLwood or Enough by Counterfeit
13:One of your favorite 80’s songs
800° by Ebba Grön (a swedish song but it’s really good)
18:A song from the year that you were born
A Thounsand Miles by Vanessa Carlton (I really couldn’t find anything better)
22:A song that moves you forward
Yellow Cloud and Malibu by Trixie Mattel
27:A song that breaks your heart
I love you, good bye by Elton Castee OR In case you don’t live forever by Ben Platt
I was wondering even though Langrisser is like my favorite series, if I would continue my track record and not finish the game in decent time. But I’ve played almost 7 routes in Langrisser 1 (ie: beaten the game about 7 times) since it came out on the 10th
so I guess that answers that
Got into the habit of saying “not to be gay” as a joke to my sister and friends (the only ones who im out to) and now i’ve started saying “not to be gay, but he’s kinda hot” and then having to remind myself that’s not the gay part sweetie
Hoping to get my ROE and last paycheque today.
And I still have to file my taxes too.
Just finished making a kandi mask for my absolutely smashing bro who happens to be a scene dork :b!!! In short I have a lot of time and they’re oddly soothing to make
Oh my god my arm from shoulder to fingertip is like 45% scar tissue what does one do to begin processing such a thing that sure is a significant amount of compromised meat aaaaaa
also i’m watching this tiktok person who gives examples of how to set boundaries and it really shows how Bad i am that i can never sympathise with the boundary setter