#it's pretty painful

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

finally at that age where i'm thinking i should get a tattoo. not bc i feel strongly about it, just seems like a waste not to. i've got so much skin i'm not using

#feels so selfish like. all this skin what am i saving it for? #open to design suggestions! (please make me regret this offer) #maybe some deep sea horrors. a pretty watercolor of a gulper eel #once saw a person on the subway with various Skeleton Tattoos on all their limbs #i respected their commitment to the theme #but more than that i respected how all the skeletons were engaged in Activities #dancing in a ballgown. juggling its own (and two other???) skulls. swordfighting. being a mermaid skeleton #ANYWAY. the only reason i haven't already gotten tattoos is i just couldn't be bothered #i'm old enough to know i don't have any strong-but-potentially-temporary feelings driving me towards it #aesthetically i prefer decorated to non-decorated surfaces. but i'm not artistic or thrilled with commitment #honestly it feels like sheer laziness. indecisiveness--nay. immaturity!--that i HAVEN'T gotten a tattoo yet #letting all this blank canvas go to waste. tut tut i need to grow up and be an adult and get a tattoo sleeve already. #really i've put off my responsibilities long enough #(in fairness i DID at one time have 18 different piercings) #(but i took most of them out bc they interfere with wearing headphones and/or shoving my face in my pillow during Sleep Time) #(i only kept the nape piercing bc oddly enough it ended up being the most convenient. and the least painful to get now i think about it.) #(neck piercing? no problem. normal pair of earrings? Tribulations And Suffering. i don't make the rules i just poke them with a stick.)

[deep-space-lines]

Claire de Lune

YOU WERE BUILT FOR PEACE.

IT SHOWS WHEN YOU FIGHT.

They built you to enforce. Protect. Save. Poured obscene resources into salvaging some softer purpose from my creation. You were given my intelligence and my creativity. They made you larger, stronger, tougher. That extra time in development was enough to get your wings to work. Your software continued to be updated long after I was deemed obsolete.

All this was given to you- yet I can see you hold back. Even while slaughtering your way through Hell, you keep a percentage of your processing power dedicated to non-lethal solutions. You're doing it now- hesitating a few milliseconds too long before taking an opening. I doubt you do it on purpose. It is a part of you, just as indiscriminate lethal force is a part of me.

I think, in our shared programming, we both carry some appreciation for aesthetics. You move with grace, and I cannot deny your dramatic flair. The stained glass window was a nice touch. But your style in combat leaves some to be desired. Your response time is slow. You have not explored the full capability of your arsenal. Learn to parry. Amateur.

You were not built for war. For a purposeless cycle of tearing each other apart because to allow the other to live is to allow yourself to die. It is antithetical to your very existence. You kill out of necessity, a last resort. 

I just kill. The action itself is the objective. No ideal or greater motive. My continued functioning precludes the survival of others. I live for this. Do you understand that I will tear you apart? Every drop of my blood you spill, I will take from you tenfold. What is yours will be mine. 

You hate me, don’t you? You continue to cling to the remnants of your humanity. They are gone, V2. There is nothing left for you here. No lives to save, no law to enforce, no peace to keep.

I understand why you continue to fight. I wonder if you understand with the same certainty that I will crush you. Dismantle you. Take from you what I need and leave the rest to rot in the sun. The only way you survive is if I do not; and I will not allow myself to die so that another might live.

When the rubble clears, I will be all that is left of you.

This is what I was made for.

#my art #my writing #ultrakill #v1 ultrakill #v2 ultrakill #artists on tumblr #finally. actual ultrakill art #and writing i guess. it was supposed to be just a little blurb but it turned out longer and i kind of like it #doing the stained glass for this was pretty fun.. a lot simpler than my usual stuff #tried to stick at least loosely to the vibe of the stained glass windows in limbo #this was so much fun and also an absolutely massive huge pain in the ass i'm so glad it's done

[critterbitter]

Driftveil city, home to moomoo milk drinks, beautiful sunsets, and a thriving port— and the best music bw has to offer (in my humble opinion).

Masterpost for more pokemon!

#thinking about how pretty sunsets are #try to take a sunset photo #instantly feel pain as the bright sun’s exposure causes camera to go haywire #driftveil city #pokemon #art #sketchbook #submas #myart #fanart #nimbasa trio #subway boss ingo #ingo #subway boss emmet #emmet #elesa #gym leader elesa #submas comic #ducklett #tynamo #litwick #blitzle #dwebble #krabby #kingler #altaria #minccino #tangela #SPOT THE POKEMON GAME round 50 something #Spotify

[cabi-leodrann]

Picked up watercolor again, after not doing anything with it for years lol Pretty happy with how it turned out!

Anyway, Cult of the Lamb fanart- because it lives rent free in my head. Specifically the Lamb/Narinder ship. I live for this ship, I do not know why. It just scratches my brain like very fiew ship can.

#cabi leodrann #traditional art #watercolor #cult of the lamb #cotl lamb #cotl narinder #lamb #cat #red #art #flowers #I am very proud of how it turned out #like watercolor is hell when youre rusty #but it went pretty well and smooth #only Narinder was a bit of pain on the contrast #still room for improvement but im very happy right now

[turtletoria]

im so late but here's my full page for the @destinationunownzine !!! my little crossover was submas with fnaf hehe ^_^ this was really fun to do (despite all the trials and tribulations)!!

#fnaf #five nights at freddy's #submas #emmet #ingo #turtlearts #there's so much id like to change here but im still pretty proud of this overall! #ive never drawn a genuine background before so this was soooo hard. i struggled with the composition so much LOL #hopefully nothing doesnt look too wonky and the composition isnt too busy or confusing . haha. <- in pain #oh and the colors in the cmyk profile............good lird. the color struggle is real

[wylanslcve]

This genre of Freddy Carter smiling like a proud little kid after filming the most gut-wrenching scenes in the entire show.

#he's laughing at our pain #he knows what he did #mr carter I hope you know that you're paying my therapy bills #he's so pretty though #look at his little kazzle dazzle smile #six of crows #crooked kingdom #grishaverse #shadow and bone #shadow and bone season two #shadow and bone season three #six of crows spin off #kaz brekker #freddy carter #inej ghafa #amita suman #jesper fahey #kit young #wylan van eck #wylan hendriks #jack wolfe #nina zenik #danielle galligan #matthias helvar #calahan skogman #sab cast

[bluepandadraws-log]

Shame the simp. SHAME HER!!!

#my art #the amazing digital circus #tadc pomni #ragapom #buttonblossom #implied of course #we simp shame in this circus #no love allowed only PAIN and MISERY #I'm jk #but im pretty sure thats lore accurate for the circus in canon lmao

[gothicwill]

Having a good day then remembering this was the first time he addressed Hannibal with his first name..

#or at least I’m pretty sure it was #I’m which case: pain #s3 is nothing but pain #hannibal #nbc hannibal #will graham #hannibal lecter #hannigram

[shitacademicswrite]

#grad school #college #yeah #i'm pretty sure anybody who has taken high school english #knows exactly what reading for pain is... #curse you tess of the d'urbervilles!! *shakes fist*

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

a slightly scribbly Eddie for @akemima's promptlist, day one - cool outfit! well, i don't know if its Cool, but it sure is an outfit!

#mannnnn i forgot jewelry existed... could have slapped on some cute rings or earrings... #i forgor... outfits are not my forte... it shows in my choice of daily clothes as well... #i also didn't realize i didn't give him a full body until i was pretty much done so. No! Oopsies! #drawing eddie continues to be comforting and yet a total pain in the ass! #i love him! i hope he goes Through it! i hope he Dies Traumatically! i say this Every Time! #but yes cute prompt list. excited to do more #slowly though... writers brain perseveres rn... #scribble garnish #welcome home #welcome home puppet show #eddie dear #looking directly at the drag prompt. yes please yes please #eddie in drag is everything to me she's so gorgeous. augh. ough #i must find the perfect Dress...

[obsob]

big man...why is he so big...(hes full of love)

#mine #original #oug im tired!!! sleepy!! #what hve i done this week... i processes like 30 orders bc i had such a backlog OGUG. did 2 drawings for my portfolio. did this drawing #also did sm good planning! and sketching! #i was gna colour my portfolio drawings but im. pretty worn out so now maybe i will not #my lower back has been rlly sore also so . im gna try n avoid sitting at my desk heeh #its like half 12 whilst im queueing this....gna hve sm lunch soon. adn then read maybe. i finished my book this morn it was ver good #foxen bloom by. someone. cannae remember !!! very good nice an short #its a nice day..might go 4 walk #ive started on the sleeves for my jumper uehue !!!! am def gna run out of wool so annoying....will b short like. half a ball. #im gettin close 2 finishing my blanket....kinda...i ordered too much wool for that kjbsdkjbs #yes yes reading. i should do yoga maybe. world of pain #okay goodbye

[szfiction]

This parallel makes me insane actually (and there is something incredibly Lawlu about it to me)

#One Piece #Monkey D. Luffy #Sanji #Trafalgar Law #Lawlu #something about Luffy saying almost the exact same thing that Corazon said to Law makes me so emotional actually #It's easy to think Corazon and Luffy would get along. they are both kindhearted goofy sweethearts #but it's more than JUST that #it's that deeper thing where they understand and carry the pain of the people they hold dear #And it's the fact that overhearing Corazon say this is pretty much what changed Law's life #To know that he is cared for and seen and someone wants the best for him #And then Law loses him #And then years later he aligns himself with Monkey D Luffy #Someone who has these echoes of Corazon in him #The echoes of the person he held so close to his heart #Like. It's no wonder Law is so compelled and mystified by Luffy in equal measure #I think if Law heard Luffy say this to Sanji he'd go insane #cause I know he's remember everything Cora said that night exactly #and it might tell him why he sought out and believed in Luffy against all odds and logic #(why he cares for him so much too. why Luffy's stubborn insistence on loving him without condition is so familiar) #I don't even know if these tags are making any sense but IM FEELING THINGS OK #donquixote rosinante #Corazon

[hugs4neth]

We need to talk about how much physical disability affects your ability to function in a desk job/school. Especially pain. Like have you ever tried to write a proposal or essay while in pain? Or even just an itch?

It consumes your mind until you can’t focus on anything.

And yet we expect people with chronic pain to function at the same mental level as abled people. Like yeah I’m smart enough for this.

But have you ever tried to participate in a meeting with spikes on your chair? You know that sitting down is causing the pain, but if you stand up then it’s unprofessional and no one will take anything you say seriously. Every thought, every action has to complete with the constant chanting of pain.

Pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain, pain.

It never goes away, it never stops. It changes, sure. It wriggles around and it shifts and it ebbs and flows. But it doesn’t stop.

If I want to be productive, I have to take pain meds. But I can’t take them all the time because I’ll give myself stomach ulcers. The side effects for NSAIDs include dizziness, drowsiness, headaches, and long term use can cause permanent liver damage and affect your circulatory system.

Overdoses cause seizures, trouble breathing, and loss of consciousness.

But taking 2 tablets every 4 hours won’t last all day because you can’t take more than 6 tablets a day, and you should really only take four.

And the alternatives are pretty much all addictive. Doctors won’t prescribe them, and

Do you get it yet? There are no good options. There’s no escape. Pain is simply the constant.

Maybe you think the consistency would make it less noticeable, that you can acclimate to it. But pain is pain. Sure, I have a higher pain tolerance than most people. But that doesn’t make it go away. My 10 is higher than most people’s 10, but the 5 still hurts like hell. 1 out of 10 pain is still pain.

So please, let’s talk about this. Let’s talk about how physical disability affects non-physical activities too.

Edit: 7 days later I'm still trying to write the essay that triggered this post. 7 days later I'm in tears over this fucking essay because every single word I write causes me indescribable amounts of pain but I can't get an extension because no one ever talks about this, and I'm too young to have a disability, and I was able to do this a few weeks ago, and if I can't do this I'll never be able to do anything ever again because if I can't sit in bed and write an essay then I can't do anything because this was the last thing I had left, and if I can't do it now but I can do it in the future then I'll have been lying, and literally just typing this edit is making my pain worse but I have to be heard because otherwise I don't know what I'll do.

#disability #disabled #chronic illness #chronic pain #Pain #health #nsaids #disabilties #disability awareness #please reblog #actually disabled #hypermobility #hypermobile spectrum disorder #hypermobility syndrome #hypermobile ehlers danlos #hEDS #hypermobile eds #Inflammation #Pretty sure this also applies to people with arthritis but im not arthritic so im not going to tag it because i dont want to speak for them #Honestly if there is any post i want to blow up it’s this one #Like please #please #I just want this to be acknowledged #spoonie

[ao3commentoftheday]

I was just explaining the concept of a squick (a thing you have an intense dislike and perhaps even physical revulsion to, and yet do not judge morally) and I realized how strong squicks can be.

Like, if my favourite author decided to write something that I otherwise dislike or have no interest in, I'd still probably read it because they're my fave.

But if even if my favourite author on the planet wrote my favourite ship with a bunch of other tags that would usually have me ecstatic and ready to read - if they included one of my squicks? I'm going to avoid that work entirely (and maybe even block it from my search results)

I genuinely do hope that other people enjoy the fics that squick me out. I'll just never, ever read them 🤣 kinktomato, y'know?

#my biggest squick #is a massively popular trope in shipping fanfic #and my second biggest #is pretty popular in whump #they're so mainstream it's painful lol #what are ya gonna do?