#it's vaguely cute in a 'oh dear god make it stop' kinda why

[get-shiggy-with-it]

Ch. 3

18+ MINORS DNI

Pairing: Shigaraki x Dabi (just this part), Tomura Shigaraki x fem!reader (very brief and vague reference to Dabi x Hawks)

Word Count: 3.4k

Warnings: smut and feels, it's literally just smut, blow jobs, friends(?) with benefits, blow jobs, anal fingering, light degradation (both for shigs and reader), could maybe be interpreted as slight dubcon, dirty talk, slutty dabi, dabi is an asshole, so is tomura, reader has gender neutral pronouns, I'm keeping it fem cause Shigs hates women and calls them that

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6

Summary: In which the boys share in some good ole roommate bonding activities and Tomura has a blow job induced epiphany.

AO3 Mirror

Taglist: @dillybuggg (shoot me an ask if you want to be tagged and make sure to check my rules!)

Dabi’s mouth was wet and so fucking warm as he swallowed around Tomura’s dick.

“Oh fuck…” he groaned as Dabi hummed around his length and did that thing where he flicked the ball of his tongue ring over Tomura’s slit.

Bright blue eyes stared up through deceptively long lashes, smirking at the way Tomura drooled as he got his soul sucked out the tip of dick. The mattress underneath him creaked despite the negligible weight of both their bodies. Dabi settled on his stomach between Tomura’s pale thighs leaving fingerprint bruises in soft flesh.

They did this sometimes, though he wasn’t quite sure when exactly it started. Dabi had been his randomly assigned roommate freshman year and he grew so used to living with him that the two of them had just silently, yet mutually agreed not to fuck something up that wasn’t broken. They both berated each other for their strange and somewhat disgusting habits—Dabi would say that Tomura was a gross shut-in creep who needed a fucking shower and Tomura called Dabi out on his slutty pastimes and obsession with piercing the hell out of every available inch of skin.

And sometimes they sucked each other off.

It was overall not a terrible arrangement—Dabi got his fill of dick and Tomura could no longer be made fun of for being completely inexperienced. Plus, as much as he was loathe to admit, Dabi was really fucking good at oral. Like, demonically good. He’d been going down on Tomura for so long now too that he’d learned all the things that had him spilling onto that pierced tongue in minutes.

Tomura jerked from his thoughts when two, lube slicked fingers prodding at his ass.

“Dabi, what the fuck are you—” he protested, wiggling his scrawny hips up the bed and inadvertently letting his cock slip out of the inviting heat between his roommate’s lips.

He couldn’t see much other than the shaking mop of black hair and pale hands with chipped black nail polish digging into his legs, yanking him back.

“Shut up freak,” Dabi slurred, words slick with spit and Tomura’s precum. Dabi said it tasted like battery acid, but it never stopped him from guzzling it like he did with cheap whiskey and cigarettes on the weekends. “I know you like it.”

He did like it, but Tomura wasn’t about to contribute to the fucking evil grin Dabi was giving him as he circled the tight ring of muscle, slipping in a finger to the first knuckle.

Tomura’s head flopped back on the pillows as he bit back a low moan, “Fuck off.”

“If you say so,” Dabi shoved his finger in roughly, squeezing a second in behind it and letting Tomura bask in the burn of being stretched too quickly before ripping his hands away.

“No!” Tomura wailed pretty fucking shamelessly and grabbed the retreating wrist, placing Dabi’s tatted hand back on his dick that throbbed and leaked painfully.

“Dude, what’s gotten the fuck into you?” his roommate asked, smirking still, but pumping Tomura's cock loosely nonetheless. “Our walls are thin as hell, you know I can hear you jerkin' it in here every night, and now you’re practically begging for me to suck you off. Usually I gotta come to you.”

He was infuriatingly right again.

Tomura had indeed asked for him to do this, which was definitely out of character for him. Most of the time when they ended up in this position, it was because Dabi spent hours hounding him about it or just fucking dropped to his knees and whipped Tomura’s cock out in the middle of a movie night or snuck into his room while Tomura was gaming and swallowed him whole just to laugh at the way his online friends reacted to the noises.

He’s just been so pent up lately, and you insisting on fucking touching his arm or sitting on the floor between his feet at League meetings was really not helping it.

“I don’t know,” Tomura lied, both to Dabi and himself in the hopes that the head of black hair would just go back to bobbing on his dick like he so desperately needed it to.

“Bro, I have fucked with enough people to know when they’re wishing I was someone else,” Dabi scoffed and ran a blessedly hot tongue from base to tip and suckled softly at the blush pink head before pulling back with a wet pop. “So who is it?”

“I’m not fucking thinking about anyone,” Tomura hissed, fisting Dabi’s spiky, black locks and thrusting into his mouth till he felt the contractions of Dabi gagging around his length. “Usually you're jumping at the chance to get dick in your mouth, so why does it matter?”

Dabi pulled back, wiping the silvery string of spit leaking past his lips away and scowling as his fingers ghosted over Tomura’s balls and sank back into his pliant ass.

“Seriously creep, I’m five seconds away from ghosting and you can fuck your hand like the sad little bitch you are. So tell me their name or I’m walking right now.”

Tomura huffed as he felt Dabi’s long, rough fingers pulled from him again and the heat of his mouth growing farther away.

“Ugh fine, it’s that bitch I’ve been working on the English thing with.”

Dabi made a face like his brain was buffering.

“Seriously?” he asked, mouth gaping in a way that had Tomura even more furious his dick wasn’t buried in it.

“Yes!” he shouted and grabbed Dabi’s cheeks in both hands, sinking past his waiting lips and practically purring when he felt them close around the base as his long tongue massaged the shaft. “Oh god yes…”

Dabi rolled his eyes, managing to look smug even with a cock stretching his lips taught against the piercings. He used to try and tease Tomura about how small his dick was, but it was hard to believe him. Especially with how he choked sometimes when Tomura got rough with him despite his boasts of lacking a gag reflex. Not to mention how he looked now, jaw probably aching with the stretch and loving every second of it.

Tomura lazily bucked his hips up and whined high when the fingers in his ass curled and thrust against that fucking spot he hadn’t known was there until Dabi found it for him.

The pleased sound he made tapered off into a growl though, when his roommate with questionable benefits pulled off again to run his slutty fucking mouth.

“Tell me about it,” he mumbled, kitten licking at Tomura’s cock and running the ball of his piercing through the slit again. Tomura gulped when he pulled it back into his mouth to swallow the bead of precum he’d collected. “I’ve seen your fucking paramour around before, pretty serious about school though. And kinda out of your league too, not gonna lie. So, what would you do if your cute little partner was here instead?”

Tomura bristled at the insult but couldn’t keep his pissed off look when Dabi went back to sucking his cock like a pro and curling those fucking fingers against his prostate. When he did speak, he blushed hard at the way his voice cracked and sounded like he was crying.

“I don’t fucking—holy shit—know,” he gasped and Dabi hummed both to egg him on and to get a whole new wave of precum gushing out of Tomura’s dick.

“C’mon man,” Dabi groaned, and Tomura distinctly heard the sound of a pants zipper and felt Dabi’s hips canting against the sheets.

That fucking masochistic whore. He would get off to Tomura dirty talking about someone else while he sucked his dick.

He considered stopping the whole thing right there, but then Dabi was sinking a third finger into his ass and thrusting hard while he hallowed his cheeks around Tomura’s cock and sucked—

“Tits!” Tomura cried and covered his burning, red cheeks with his hands. “I want to put my fucking face in them and taste them in my mouth. Sometimes I can see the outline of their nipples when we’re working and the air conditioning comes on and I want to suck on them so fucking bad I can’t think about anything else the whole night.”

Once he got started, Tomura found the words just spilled from him like a dam had burst. Dabi, the depraved bastard, groaned loud and ground his pierced dick harder against the mattress as he continued to deepthroat Tomura’s cock and fuck his ass at that perfect angle.

“Sometimes when they drag me to their stupid club I lose the rounds cause I—oh god, oh fuck—just imagine them in my lap, sitting on my cock and fucking writhing and squeezing me while we face off. Such a fucking—Dabi more!—stereotypical try-hard, bitch but I want to be inside them so fucking bad,” he felt actual tears stinging the raw corners of his eyes when Dabi sped up on his dick.

Tomura scrapped his nails against Dabi’s scalp, holding on for dear life as his breathing became even more ragged than usual. His friend’s cruelty streak reared its ugly head as Dabi sensed the tensing of Tomura’s balls and the clench of his tight ass and slowed down a fraction, keeping him teetering on the edge of an explosively pleasurable release.

“Fucking asshole,” he growled, but didn’t dare try to fuck Dabi’s face lest he make good on his threat to leave Tomura high and dry. “I just—shit, ah, don’t stop—they talk to me sometimes and I just wanna suck their tongue into my mouth so they shut up and I need to hear them fucking falling apart or using that stupid, stuck up teacher voice on me and fucking my ass—Dabi Fuck—is that what you wanted to hear?”

Dabi, because he got off on being a little shit, gave him one last delicious swallow before pulling back and fisting Tomura’s sopping wet cock. The fingers had stopped thrusting and were now pressed hard against his prostate, sending shocks through his body and making him twitch violently as his blood rushed with endorphins. He never stopped grinding his own dick against Tomura’s cotton sheets the whole time.

“You got it bad huh, don’t ya creep,” he mused, letting a fat glob of spit fall from his lips and keep his palm slick. “That’s the most I’ve ever heard you talk about fucking anything, much less another actual person.”

“No I fucking don’t, “ Tomura writhed against the pillows, giving in to the undeniable urge to simultaneously fuck up into Dabi’s hand and ride his fingers.

“Who knew you were such a desperate whore, falling for the first person to show you a modicum of attention,” Dabi jeered and squeezed the tip of his dick hard, listening to Tomura let out a choked sob. “I’m actually kinda proud of you, bro. My little incel baby’s growing up.”

Dabi cooed at Tomura, sinking sharp teeth deep into the meat of his thigh and sucking a bruise into the flesh.

“You’re the one—nghh—getting off on it,” Tomura clapped back but didn’t bother denying it again.

There was a sense of dread growing in his gut alongside the mounting pleasure of his orgasm that Dabi was currently holding hostage. Dabi may have had a dickish personality just as massive as the actual dick that was currently painting his comforter in stains, but he knew Tomura.

And he did, admittedly have much more experience with these types of things.

“Fuck yeah I am,” Dabi grunted. “Last time I let you return the favor you bit my fucking cock. I gotta get off somehow.”

“Don’t say rude shit to me and I won’t bite you.”

“Watch it, Tomura,” Dabi huffed and nipped at his thigh again. “You should be thanking me for my services.”

“Not if you’re gonna keep running your mouth instead of sucking me off,” he tried to sound intimidating but he was well and truly wrecked and couldn’t find the energy to give his words an edge.

“You should ask them out,” Dabi continued, ignoring the failed attempts at banter. “Bring ‘em over or some shit. Maybe then if I lock down that blonde piece of ass I’ve been talking to, we’ll both have much more interesting things to go down on.”

“Your whore ass is the one always jumping me, don’t act like it’s a fucking chore,” Tomura groaned as Dabi started licking at his cock again, pressing sloppy, half kisses on the tip as he jerked it in his fist.

“Not my fault I get bored sometimes,” he replied and closed his eyes as Tomura clenched particularly hard around Dabi’s relentless fingers. “But seriously, you should go for it. I’d kill to find out if you’re just as bad at eating pussy as you are sucking dick.”

“Fuck y—” Tomura started to say when Dabi reared up till they were chest to chest and their foreheads knocked together.

“I fucking will if you don’t shut up, creep, and I think it’d be so much better if you handed your fucking virginity to that pretty little partner bitch instead,” he said and stunned Tomura into silence when he licked into his mouth.

Dabi had kissed him before, but Tomura could count the number of occasions on one hand and almost all had been when his punk ass roommate was drunk as hell and in his feels about some tortured past. But Dabi’s eyes were bright and lucid now, blinking down at Tomura as he dragged their tongues together, flooding his mouth with the faint taste of cigarettes and jizz.

Their cocks brushed together too, the stimulation making Tomura whine into Dabi’s lips, who dropped a merciful hand down, taking them both in his fist and began pumping.

He didn’t stop as he pulled back, grinning down at Tomura like a fucking maniac—all shitty tattoos and silver piercings. The little barbels that stuck through Dabi’s nipples brushed against his own and made him moan at the cool metal and hot skin on his sensitive chest. Tomura was fucking sensitive everywhere, as Dabi had helped him discover, probably from a lifetime of being touched more by cheap sweatshirts than human hands.

“Now,” Dabi grunted as he thrust loosely against Tomura’s cock and his own fist before pulling away to settle back between his legs. “Shut up and cum down my throat—gotta give your virgin ass a refresher on mind shattering orgasms, so you know if that bitch is any good or not.”

Tomura’s tongue was halfway around a witty comeback when Dabi swallowed him to the hilt once again and started working his ass even harder. He really fucked hoped the neighbors were not home to hear him get his shit rocked at 2pm on a fucking Tuesday, cause Dabi might have been flunking out of his classes but he’d get a goddamn A plus for sucking dick.

The hand on his thigh, spreading him open, migrated to his hip so that Tomura could snap his legs shut hard around Dabi’s ring littered ears as he guided Tomura to grind down on his hand. The pressure in his gut built up exponentially higher now that Dabi wasn’t trying to hold him on the edge of climax. It took an embarrassingly short amount of time for him to acquiesce to Dabi’s request, as he tightened up in a full body clench before gripping Dabi’s hair and spilling rope after rope of hot, sticky release straight onto his roommate’s tongue.

Dabi, the fucking slut, made a show of swallowing every drop that spilled from Tomura’s abused cock, milking his prostate the whole time and only letting Tomura slip from his mouth when he was soft and finally spent.

The fingers in his ass remained though, still for the most part and slowly dipping in and out every so often. Tomura whimpered and clenched but was somewhat thankful for the remaining feeling of fullness.

“So, did you really mean all that?” Dabi asked with his signature smirk. “You really want your group project partner to cockwarm you and fuck your tight little ass?”

“Fuck off,” Tomura scowled and smacked Dabi hard across the face with an errant pillow.

Dabi yanked it from his grasp and tossed his ammunition onto the floor. “Hey, it’s not actually too bad in here,” he wiggled his fingers for emphasis which elicited an embarrassingly high gasp from Tomura, “give ‘em my number if you need a reference for asshole tightness.”

“Get the fuck out of my ass and my room,” Tomura kicked at Dabi’s back as it shook with laughter that lacked it’s usual jeering bite.

“What? Saving the cuddles for your new S/O?” he shot back, nuzzling his cum and spit covered face into Tomura’s neck.

With their chests pressed together, Tomura could feel the cooling, sticky remnants of Dabi’s own release coating his stomach. He squirmed against the sensation and pushed at the offending chest until his friend flopped down onto the scant space left between the mattress and the wall.

“Ew,” Tomura ran a finger through the mess Dabi had left smeared on him. “I’m taking a fucking shower.”

“God, finally!” Dabi exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air and producing a cigarette from god knows where. He let the paper rest between his lips unlit. “I should have thought about getting you fucked out on the reg earlier, creep, if it’ll stop you smelling like ass.”

Tomura launched the discarded pillow which hit it’s mark with a dull thump.

“You better be fucking gone when I get back,” he hissed and stumbled naked, on shaking legs into the hall and to their shared bathroom.

Dabi’s cackling followed him until the door shut and the lock clicked behind him.

Tomura turned the water on quickly, letting steam cloud the mirror before he jumped under the spray. The only products on the shelves were Dabi’s for the most part with the exception of a store brand bar of soap and some 3 in one shampoo, conditioner, and body wash.

Tomura knew he should clean himself more often, but his skin was so fucking raw all the time it hurt to do, so he mostly avoided it unless the smell got really unbearable—or Dabi was painting him in jizz whenever the opportunity presented itself.

He tried to get in and out as quickly as possible so he didn’t have the opportunity to think too hard about the admission his fuck buddy roommate had pulled from him mid blow job. Because if he did—in his post nut, clingy state—he’d most certainly imagine you were with him, tits pressed against his back and your soft, insistent tongue dipping past his lips, tasting like fruit gum and expensive cafe drinks instead of nicotine and cum.

And he really couldn’t handle that. Cause Dabi was right, he had something fucking bad for you and the thought of another rejection loomed large.

When he did towel himself off and shuffle, still naked back into his bedroom Dabi was nowhere to be seen. Tomura’s phone however, was left sitting right next to the jizz stain on his sheets. He frowned at the open balcony door where Dabi was no doubt smoking and snatched the device before tumbling onto the pillows.

He powered it on and scrolled through his notifs before one caught his eyes. You and Dabi were really the only people that ever texted him, but the contact name above this one had changed.

bitch (endearing)

— hey, starting an impromptu round of Smash soon if you’re interested <3

The stupid text heart made his chest throb and he stared at Dabi’s new nickname for you, not even noticing the fucking grin that tugged at his cheeks.

He bit his lip to stop the twitching when it pulled too hard at the chapped skin and scrambled for his clothes before shooting a quick confirmation text back. Tomura opted for his only pair of black jeans this time instead of sweats and the least stained sweatshirt he owned.

Dabi peaked around the corner when he heard the clink of Tomura’s keys. The bastard was smoking in just a pair of underwear that left half his ass on display for all the whole fucking street. He smirked, quirking his eyebrows and bringing his hands up to slip his index finger through the circle he made on the other hand in a silent, vulgar gesture.

“Screw off,” Tomura shouted over his shoulder and made for the door.

“Wrap it before you tap it, bro!” Dabi called after him, cut off by the subsequent slamming.

Tomura took the stairs two at a time, pulling out his phone and tucking the hood over his damp hair, this time to hide the growing smile playing at his lips.

#tomura shigaraki x reader #shigaraki tomura x reader #tomura shigaraki x you #tomura x reader #shigaraki x reader #tomura shigaraki x dabi #shigaraki x dabi #shigadabi #bee.writes

[superhero--imagines]

Part 1 Here! / Part 2 Here! / Part 3 Here! / Part 4 Here! / Part 5 Here! / Part 6 Here! / Part 7 Here! / Part 8 Here! / Part 9 Here! / Part 10 Here!

A/N: I apologize for all the profanity in this part ahead of time. I think I’m going to do M/W/Sat updates, as long as my writing permits, and then maybe Wed/Sat updates. I got the day off because it snowed so I thought I would post this since it’s ready haha

* Well you’re royally f*cked

* There’s a big stupid smile curled on your face, and every time you try to hide it, it just comes back wider

* You really shouldn’t be happy right now

* “What has you in such a good mood?” Edward’s got a matching smile of his own.

* Oh shit. It’s fine, you’ll just play dumb.

* “How do you know I’m happy?” How about the dumb grin you’ve got on your face you stupid b*tch.

* You would have smacked your own forehead if you weren’t aware Edward was watching your every move

* You’re lucky Edward’s nice and he doesn’t call you out on it

* “Whenever you’re happy it kind of radiates off of you,” his voice lowers “you know because of your powers”

* Ah, you didn’t know you did that

* “So what do you think about the new girl?” You blurt it out like it’s an intrusive thought

* F*ck. Just-okay just play it cool. Play it cool.

* F********ckkkkk what’s wrong with you.

* Is being happy making you act like a moron?

* He shrugs

* “Just another human, I kind of wish everyone would shut up about it though. Having to hear people talk about her and think about her is getting annoying. It’s like being in a tunnel with one too many echoes.”

* Ah, so he hasn’t noticed yet.

* “I wonder what she’s thinking about.”

* Edward just shrugs again.

* What the f*ck Edward take a hint!

* “Edward?”

* “Yes dear?” He has the nerve to grin after using that pet name. The criminal is teasing you. Some best friend.

* And still it makes you outrageously happy

* You have to force your smile into a straight line

* “What’s the new girl thinking?”

* He looks over to her, Tyler and Mike are fighting for her attention, both of them a moment away from tugging on each arm and shouting “mine!”

* You see him search, you’ve heard enough about his powers to know right now it’s like mall food court level of chatter for him, but in a few seconds he’ll focus on her and realize he can’t hear her thoughts.

* Knowing how prideful he is though, he’ll probably deny it.

* “I don’t know I can’t read her mind” he says bluntly. “Do you think the school music teacher would teach me how to play violin if I asked?”

* “What?!?”

* “I know it’s kind of inconsiderate to ask but-“ you click your tongue

* “No not that!” You gesture towards Bella “you can’t read her mind?!? Isn’t that kind of a big deal?”

* His eyebrows thread together

* “I can’t read your mind either”

* Yes but you’re from a completely different world, in a body that radiates despair (and apparently joy now). You’re basically like some type of eldritch being from another dimension. 

* Edward doesn’t see it that though

* “Honestly it’s a relief, one less mind I have to tune out.” He walks ahead of you as you stay motionless in the middle of the hallway

* What the f*ck is happening?

* “Are you coming? We’re going to be late for Biology if you keep lagging behind like that.”

* How could you forget? The whole story starts because Edward is super into Bella’s blood! He fantasizes killing her for like- the entire class period.

* You were worried for nothing, just because they didn’t have the cafeteria moment isn’t that big of a deal

* The thought makes you both relieved and a little sad

* Still it’s for the best, this is the way things are supposed to be

* And who knows, if you have to leave maybe you can poach Rosalie and Emmett to leave with you

* And maybe Jasper, he won’t like having a human around the house all the time

* “Mr. Cullen, Ms. Eleazar” Mr. Banner hands you each a worksheet.

* Oh right the onion cell worksheet. Ah right the mitosis crap. Well hopefully Mike remembers enough that you both can hobble through

* “New year means new seating arrangement!” He tells you both excitedly. The seating arrangements on the projector.

* “Why am I next to Edward isn’t the seating arrangement supposed to be alphabetical?”

* “I decided to go by grade this time, you should be happy! Aren’t you two...friends?” You can tell your teacher is confused by the nature of your relationship, almost as much as you are. 

* “Super happy Teach.” You mumble taking your seat next to Edward who’s grinning like an idiot

* “You can’t say he’s picking favorites when it’s merit based.” He grins and you roll your eyes

* Angela’s sitting next to Ben Cheney, they seem to be discussing the trigonometry homework, and how it’s basically impossible

* Oh right, he’s supposed to be her boyfriend this year. 

* Personally you think Angela could do way better. But love is blind, you’ll ship it if you have to. 

* And right on cue Mike walks in, Bella following close behind. He takes his seat on the table behind you while Bella talks to Mr. Barnes

* “Why didn’t you guys sit with us at lunch today?” Mike is practically leaned over the entire width of the table.

* Before you can say anything Edward snorts

* “Because (Y/N) was getting lectured for staying out all night again”

* Mike looks like his eyes might pop out of his head

* “W-what? Out all night?! Without inviting me!” You roll your eyes.

* “He’s making it more dramatic, I went out for a run early in the morning because I couldn’t sleep and everyone was freaking out because they thought I got kidnapped.”

* Like any vampire or human stood a chance against you and your violent mood swings

* Mike’s so caught up in lecturing you about how you need to be more careful

* “There’s a lot of weirdos out there!” Yeah you live with them

* That he doesn’t even notice Bella’s taken a seat next to him

* Now that you get a better look at her, she is kinda pretty. She’s the kind of person who probably always looks good in photographs, no matter what the angle. Nice cheekbones and big brown eyes. Modest on boobs and butt, but she’s skinny so it works for her.

* “Hey, you’re Bella right?” You give her your friendliest smile, and you don’t miss the light blush that blooms on her face.

* You’re not sure whether it’s from your beauty or because she’s just not used to so much attention. She just nods.

* “Have you already seen the three whole things there are to do in Town on a Friday night?”

* Bella actually laughs at that. She’s got dimples, and little wrinkles that show up at the corner of her eyes. It’s cute.

* “One of those things is going to the library, so really it’s only two things.”

* She giggles again.

* “Is the other one going over to your house to play monopoly?” Mike asks, a grin arching onto his face

* “No my house is out of town, the other thing is to go to the school football game”

* “I’m not really a big fan of football” Bella hesitantly says, and Mike and Edward laugh

* “Yeah no one here does, everyone goes for the half time show, or just to hang out.” 

* You’re pretty sure your entire friend group only goes to the games to see your cheer routine, especially this year since you’re captain now. The first junior captain in a long time apparently. The news actually made the local newspaper.

* Everything is going good, and you’re starting to think maybe you and Bella might be friends.

* “Why don’t we have a board game night at our house again? Last time was-“

* You stop sentence, you were having so much fun you almost forgot why Edward was so obsessed with Bella.

* The slight breeze from the air conditioning brings her scent to you.

* You cover your mouth and nose with your hand

* Her scent is REVOLTING

* “(Y/N), are you okay?” Mike asks

* You vaguely feel Edward’s hand on your shoulder, has he not caught her scent yet?

* It’s pretty hard to miss

* Like gym socks, with a overly sweet base, it’s like-

* Your head snaps up, and your hand clamps over your mouth and nose even harder, but not because the scent is revolting

* She smells like cheese, perfectly aged Gorgonzola cheese, or maybe Brie?

* You smell the sweeter undercurrent stronger now, it’s like warm juicy peaches

* Roasted peach salad tossed with Gorgonzola and olive oil

* How many times have you dreamed about eating that while basking in the warm sunlight

* “I knew you shouldn’t have eaten those leftovers at lunch,” Edward says, but you know it’s performative, thank god he’s still got some sense after smelling her.

* “Mr.Banner, I think (Y/N) ate something bad, is it alright if I help them to the nurses office?”

* “Yes and hurry!” He’s practically shooing you out as Edward pulls you by the arm

* Nooooo, you wanna smell her moreeee

* You have the sense to not wine and keep your mouth covered.

* Edward doesn’t take you to the nurse, you both don’t stop walking until you’re at the parking lot

* “What the hell was that?” He asks, it’s the first time he’s seemed even remotely angry with you

* He seems more confused then angry though, you’re so shocked you actually sit down on the curb.

* And after a moment of hesitance Edward sits beside you, placing his hand over your own

* “She smells good Edward, like really good.”

* Edward laughs

* “Yeah I gathered that” he shakes his head. “I thought you were supposed to be a picky eater”

* “I aaaaamm” you moan, your head is cradled in your left hand. “She’s like one in a million”

* “You’re one in a million” you lift your head to see Edward looking at you with that stupid sh*t eating grin.

* “Really Edward my life is falling apart because I want to eat someone, and you think the appropriate response is to flirt?”

* To be fair, he’s always flirting, it’s basically apart of his personality at this point

* “You’re being melodramatic.” He chuckles and throws an arm over your shoulder. “Worst case scenario you kill her, Carlisle doles out his funeral punishment-don’t ask, and then we have to start over as freshman again somewhere else.”

* You groan, you finally worked your way up to a junior, you were just starting to get used to this crappy town, you don’t wanna start all over again in a new one

* “What’s the best case scenario?”

* Edward thinks hard for a minute.

* “Best case scenario...the music teacher agrees to teach me how to play the violin and I impress you with my magnificent playing.” You smack him on the arm.

* “Not the best case scenario for you!” You know he’s doing it on purpose. He just wants to make you laugh

* It works, you do laugh. How much more absurd could this situation get?

* “Everything’s going to be fine, if Jasper can handle having to smell 300 students he thinks smell good, you can handle 1.” 

* He’s got a point

* “Wait-didn’t she smell good to you?” Wasn’t that like, the whole d*mn point?

* His eyebrows thread together and he shrugs

* “Um, she smelled alright, no better or worse than the others. I’m not sure what you smelled-“

* What you smelled? The rich but refreshing flavor profile is sublime

* The f*cking heathen doesn’t even know what he’s missing

* “But to me she smelled like peaches”

* Well he kinda knows what he’s missing

* “She’s definitely anemic though, there’s a sever lack of iron in her scent” ah that must be that cheesy smell you’re getting

* Well ain’t this ironic. The girl who’s going to steal your best friend is only getting noticed because of you.

* “I don’t know, personally I prefer Henrietta the 3rds blood, but that’s just me” he’s lying, your blood is good and all, but it’s definitely still not on par with a humans blood

* He’s just trying to make you feel better.

* He rubs your shoulder, before patting it and moving to stand up.

* “Now come on, we have to make you eat some human food so you can throw up in front of the nurse and she lets us leave school early”

* You roll your eyes, anything to leave school early huh?

* “Yeah all right, lead the way Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Brooding”

* “Why do you always say that? I don’t brood that much anymore!”

* “You know how some people have resting b*tch face? You have resting brood face.”

* “Says the person who literally radiates despair” you shove him as you both walk towards the vending machine

* You take a deep breath as you watch Edward fumble with the vending machine

* The dork literally sticks a credit card up to the glass and demands the machine give him chips. 

* (Y/N/N) why isn’t this working? Am I supposed to insert my card through this slot?” 

* You laugh. You’re pretty sure he’s not doing this on purpose.

* “You’re supposed to use cash Edward.”

* You watch as he fumbles with his wallet muttering:

* “Do you think it’ll take a twenty dollar bill?”

* You watch in amusement as Edward tries - and fails- to use a twenty dollar bill, and then proceed to use obscure profanities to curse “this vile wretch of human technological advancement” 

* You feel a sigh of relief escape you.

* Yeah, everything is going to be fine. 

Tags:  @moonlights27 @thebluetint @the100thtwilight @awesomebooklover17 @oneofthepotterheads @smileygirl08 @imdoingathingmom @iconicgguk @yrawn @alyciaswhore @little-horror-show @wicked-watering-can @lazydreamers @xxxmuxxx @puritanicalhypocrite

#twilight #twilight saga #twilight imagine #twilight headcanon #twilight reader insert #edward cullen imagine #edward cullen x reader #edward cullen #emmett cullen x rosalie hale #carlisle cullen #jessica stanley #angela weber #jessica stanley x reader #bella swan #bella swan x reader #superhero--imagines

[too-scared-to-do-this]

Of the Devil’s head

(Bonus) Chapter fourteen - In search for Happiness

Sander’s sides fanfiction

Wordcount: 2228

Ship: prinxiety 

TW: cursing, hurt, very vague description of sickness and dying, Remi being my version of Remi, some cute angst I guess - but not really. If anything else, just let me know :3

Summary of the whole story: They say, the one that wears the crown rules all - the living, the dead, the walking, the crawling, the rooted, the sane and the mad. They say, once you own the crown, you become the  most powerful being on Earth and beyond. Roman’s stolen bigger things - a measly little crown won’t present a problem, even if he has to steel it straight off of the devils head!

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Chapter fourteen - In search for Happiness

It’s been four years since Roman left Hell.

Four years since he last saw his bellowed Devil. Virgil.

How nice that name rang in his head. He smiled to himself as he pushed yet another branch out of his way. The forest seemed to have gotten thicker since the last time he walked this rout. (Which was like two weeks ago.)

It’s become somewhat of a habit - walking around the kingdom looking for the entrance every couple of weeks - after he didn’t find it in the forest the next time he went.

Apparently, those signs weren’t bullshit after all. The entrance relocated as often as the moon changed positions…

But Roman made a promise. And when this former thief makes a promise, he keeps it.

So he pushed on, branch after branch, tear in the shirt, a thorn in the palm.

He just hoped the signs would actually show up at some point and his search wouldn’t end up, once again, useless.

It was getting colder, the sun setting through the crowns of the threes. Roman looked up for a second. He would have to turn back soon-

Aaaand he was falling.

Where? He had no idea. How? Not sure. Why? Again, he was clueless. But was he screaming? Without a doubt. “Fucking Heeeeell!!!!”

“Ow…” he hit the ground with a thud. It must have been at least a couple of feet that he fell. How the hell did he not break anything?

Wait! He moved his libs cautiously. No. Nothing broken. But bruised and purple in the next few hours, for sure!

God, his lungs hurt! The impact knocked the air out of them. He rolled onto his back.

And now, Roman was just laying clueless, looking at the irregular ceiling of the whole. With spears pointed at him.

“Am…” he swallowed. “Hi.”

At least he knew where he was now.

The Demons didn’t even budge. just stared at him with all their weird eyes.

“-and that just made him redder! like, hon, you literally can’t imagine! He was red! I’m telling ya! Red!  And then I said, ‘It’s not like I was talking about his dic- oh my Hades!”

Oh, beautiful Persephone… Why?

“No way! You actually came back! What a fucking surprise!” Remi crouched over the poor being. “I didn’t expect to see you ever again. Nobody did honestly. You seemed too… how would I say this - simple minded? - to find your way back? But look at you! In parts but in Hell!”

“You know this thing?” one of the guards granted.

Remi turned to him, all offended. “Excuse me - know? I not just know him! We’re good friends! So step back, idiots. He’s under my protection.”

“Gods, I forgot you even existed…” Roman groaned collecting all his bones off of the floor.

Remi just grinned. “Love you too, boo. You’ll take me out for a coffee as thanks.”

“What, you can walk freely in and out of Hell now?” the former thief once agan groaned as he sat up fully.

“Give it a couple of years and I will! But anyways, it’s good that you’re here.”

“Really?”

“Oh yeah! The guards were starting to bore me.”

“Well.” why was he not even surprised? “Where’s Virgil?”

“Oh yeaaah, he’s still alive. I completely forgot about him.”

“How can you forget about your own Devil?”

Remi shrugged, glasses somehow glistening even though there was literally no light down here. “He’s not much of a Devil now. More like what’s left of him.”

Roman’s brows furrowed. He pushed himself onto his feet, wincing a little. Maybe not broken, but pretty hurt. “What do you mean?”

“He’s an idiot, that’s what I mean.” the Demon shrugged again, fanged grin sliding back onto place. “Aaanyways!” he started walking of to Gods-know-where. Roman hurried after as fast as he could. “How much did you hear after you fell? Cause, like, it get’s juicy and I don’t want any missing details!”

“Am… Where are we going exactly? Are you taking me to him? And, what are you talking about?”

“Whatever. I’ll just start from the beginning! So, there I was all like-“

An interesting fact about the Human brain is that it is able to shut out everything once you are deep enough in thoughts. But, no matter how loud your thoughts get, or how deep you dig yourself, you can’t shut out Remington.

So Roman had no choice but to listen to that annoying being yapping on about - surprise, surprise - coffee.

It’s been four years. Makes you wonder how longs he’s been chewing people’s ears of with his “struggles”.

The liveling’s sense of time wasn’t the greatest. But he’s sure it’s been more then an hour that they’ve been walking. It must have been! Right?

It was ten minutes. But Roman didn’t know that.

It wasn’t even Remi’s fault. He kinda liked the guy. In a twisted, self-deprecating way.

“-oh yeah! And he was like ‘Well if you want it so bad! Why don’t you just go and get some?! And I was like ‘I can’t! I’m fucking stuck in Hell! And that was meant as literally as metaphorically, believe me! But anyways.” the demon stopped. “This is you. Enjoy him while you can!”

“You’re not coming?”

“Oh nooo! I don’t want to be around that slump. He bums me out!” Remi shook his head vehemently. And the murmured something under his breath that roman just barely caught. “Besides, I can hear him thinking even from hear. I don’t need to be that close.”

“So… I can just walk in?”

“Oh, sure babe! You’ve got nothing better to do anyways. Unlike me. So, byeeeee!” and he was off, long strides across the endless hallway. His hips moving completely over-done with every step.

Roman gulped. Looked at the giant wooden double door.

He’s been waiting for this exact moment for the past four years. Behind these doors was the being he loved.

He didn’t even hesitate.

With much more force then he expected to need he pushed the doors open and walked in.

The familiarity of this place was truly scare. His eyes glided over the place he tried to hide behind the stone beams. The place they sat together, him admiring the beautiful sight of Virgil’s wings. (Somewhere in the background he heard a tiny hiss, but he didn’t really register it.)    

The magnificent high ceiling.

And the throne. The cold, uncomfortable stone throne. And on it, Virgil. Cooped up in a loose ball, his back to Roman.

Roman couldn’t help the happy laugh that bubble out of him. “Virgil!”

The being stiffened. Was that… could that really be…? He sat up, too fast for his body’s liking and turned his head towards the voice. He gasped quietly and shakily. “You…”

And there he was, the most beautiful and kindest creature Roman has ever seen. Looking at him with his wide cloudy eyes as if he was a dream. And all that idiot managed to say was: “You look like shit.”

Virgil just raised an amused eyebrow. “Thanks, but you’re not better yourself.”

“Ah well, you know. I just went through literal Hell to get to you.”

“I’ve been living in ‘literal Hell’ all my life. I think I win.” the Devil snickered, ending with a cough. “But seriously. You gotta get those scars checked out. I’ll call for the medics.” he pushed himself off of that throne, made two steps and fell backwards. Back against the throne. “Yeah. Maybe not.”

“Gods, what happened to you?” Romans worried voice rang through the whole place. “I though Devil’s are supposed to be immortal!” he rushed over to the being.

“Ah well, you know. Not when there’s a Human running around with their name constantly on his mind.” V shrugged. As if it was nothing. As if the fact that his non-life wasn’t about to end in like a year. It was supposed to be a least twelve years of life - apparently roman couldn’t get him out of his head, not even for a moment.

“So… You’re dying?”

“Kinda, I guess?”

“But… if the name is so important, why did you tell me?”

“Am… I kinda saved your soul after you left? I erased yours so you’d be able to go to Heaven once you actually die. I didn’t really think you’d come back. And living millennia knowing you won’t ever see someone you love…” the Devil cast his eyes down. “…yeah…”

“You erased my name from your memory?”

“Yeah.”

“That annoying little demon was right. You’re a complete moron.” Roman sighed exhasparatedly.

Virgil blinked. “Excuse me, what?”

“You’re an idiot. You’re a complete and utter idiot.”

“Because I tried to save your soul…?”

“What even made you think I’d want to go to heaven?”

The Devil pursed his lips. “Oh, I don’t know. Maybe that panic attack you had when you saw all those damned souls getting tortured?”

Roman stared at him. Eyes cold and face neutral. And then he smacked his lips. “Okay. That’s a valid reason.”

“Well, I know!”

“But still. It doesn’t give you the right to decide for me. I should get to decide where I want to end up. And that’s here. With you.”

Virgil just watched the nameless Human crouching in front of him.

“Besides. I made a promise. And Roman always keeps his promises.” the liveling smiled.

Roman. Yeah. That was his name.

Suddenly all the memories of him saying Roman’s name rushed back into Virgil’s mind. He loved that name. “Now your soul will forever be doomed to stay here…”

“I don’t really mind actually.” Roman shrugged and settled down next to his demon pulling him close.

The shorter creature instinctively curled up at his side. He missed this. He missed him.

“So, there’s no curing you?”

“Not that I know off…” Virgil shrugged sadly. “I’m sorry…”

Roman pulled him even closer, careful with how fragile his dear seemed. “We’ll come up with something. I promise.”

“And you always keep your promises.”

“Yes, I do!” Roman grinned.

A moment of silence comfortable silence passed. Full of happiness but heavy with fear of what’s next… Then the former thief asked: “Was there a moment you regrated erasing my name?”

“Hm.” that signature nose-laugh. Roman missed that. “A couple actually. I really wanted to believe you’d come back eventually. The first time I ran straight to Remington and begged him to tell me your name.”

“And?”

“And I said: ‘I donno, who cares?’” Remi stepped through the open doors, hips swinging - like the true deva he is. Something in his hands. “No offence, hon, but I forgot the moment you mentioned it. Unlike me, you’re not the most memorable.”

“And yet you remember me.” Roman smirked.

“Agh. You disgust me, Human.”

The sitting pair just laughed. “What’s up Remi? Haven’t seen you around much.” Virgil asked, voice noticeably weaker than the last time Remi had heart it.

“Look what I’ve got.” he grinned letting the thing he was holding fall to their feet with a loud bang. A book.

Remi sat down in front of it. “You were getting really annoying with that ‘I’m so dying’ act. Honestly, Virgie, you were even more boring than before this thing showed up.” he rolled his eyes, nodding towards Roman. “So, I actually read a book. God I was so bored! But anyways, you see, in my reading -“

“Wait, you actually read?” V’s expression was so surprised it almost made Roman laugh. But he had the decency the at least conseil it as a cough.

“Well, I forced the souls to read it for me and then threw them into the pit if it wasn’t interesting enough.

“Now that makes much more sense.” the Devil laughed.

“As I was saying, in my reading, stumbled upon this one. It talks about name-power and all that jazzy stuff.”

“That’s great Remi, but why are you telling us?”

“Just wait a little, will you? I’m getting there! There’s a cure.”

“A cure?” Roman peeped up, eyes and voice both full of hope. “As in to save Virgil?”

“Yeah. Turns out you just gotta say your name again.” Remington shrugged, leaning back. His job was done. Now he could go back to not caring ever again. It is exhausting.

“Well, we did that and nothing.” the Human breathed, happiness flailing away. Virgil also seemed a little more bummed. But the devil never let’s his hopes up high, so they don’t fall too low.

“Hollow-head! Nothing happens overnight! Give it a couple more days. Like a weak or two. And you’ll be good as new.” the demon grinned at the king.

“So he’s going to be okay?” Roman asked shivering with happy anticipation.

“Yes. Now excuse me. I gotta get this back to Gory - I stool it from the library when she wasn’t looking.” Remi stood up clearing his throat. Signature grin in place, book under his armpit.

He was almost out the door when a fleeting thought of Virgil’s caught his ear. “Thank you.”

Remi looked back at the Devil. He was smiling at Roman, who talked animatedly about Hades-knows-what. he hasn’t seen him smile like that in literal forever.

For the first time, Virgil seemed truly happy.

Remi turned back and walked out the door. He wasn’t needed anymore.

“Always.”

----------------------------------

That old chatter-box really cares! He spent month digging through that monstrous library to find anything about the names - but he would never actually admit it.

--------------

Surprise, surpruse!!

A bonus chapter! Because I’m not that cruel XD

But in all honesty, I personally, while loving a good happy end, rather read a story with some open-ended angst. Makes me angry? Yes. Makes me want to come up with all these scenarios it could continue with? Absolutely! So yeah...

I would’ve uploaded this sooner, but had the most full and stressful and yet relaxing week ever (Don’t ask me how that works. I am still confused.), So here it is now :)

Thanks for sticking around guys! Love you! <3

And as always, hope you enjoyed :3

-

Tag list:

@romano-hottopic

@vpow

@a-formless-entity

@lovelivingmydreams

@alice-only-me

#of the devil's head #Virgil the king of hell #Roman the thief #prinxiety #virgil sanders #ts virgil #anxiety sanders #roman sanders #ts roman #creativity sanders #thomas sanders #sander's sides #what else should I tag

[moth-based-cryptology]

more hc’s!! even though i’m in school!!

al mining all the way to bedrock with race and being like ‘hey babe can you get this block for me i’m gonna build our house try to get at least five okay?’

and race, clueless, is like ‘sure babe!’ and after twenty minutes race is loSING HIS MIND and al is like uhhh babe i kinda need it?? and race is like, near tears, IM TRYING IM TRYINF I SWEAR I SWEAR

eventually al tells him and race unplugs al’s computer

race speaking italian bc he’s stressed and al doesn’t know what he’s saying but dear god that’s so hot

people make a million gifs abt al’s face and race is like ‘oh so italian is a turn on for you huh?’ but race, little bitch, says it in italian and watches al live up to his nickname of red

one time al is rly tired as he’s streaming and just falls asleep at his computer and race is facing his computer and eventually he realizes he’s been rambling and that al hasn’t said much? and he’s like ‘uhh babe you okay?’ and then looks over and you can see the exact moment his heart bursts bc al just dozed off and he’s so cute and the comments r going crazy

al is pretty shy abt it he’s like oh my god they saw me sleeping that’s so embarrassing hey race stop!! it wasn’t cute!!! and race is like uhhh yeah it was but he’s still sweet ofc and al (who’s slowly becoming more comfortable with himself) is like oh. okay. and the fans are like THATS SO ADORABLE

someone points out at one point that race and al have the exact same follower count and they’re like !!! that’s actually so cute!!!

race’s background is him and al and al’s is just race and they’re so cute and so in love

race n al both getting super into the game and they’re put on opposite teams and become like. lethal. like race is super smart ofc but he’s not saying anything so al has NO idea where to find him, but alternatively, someone keeps killing race’s teammates and no one can seem to beat them theyre so strong??

at one point al walks in and race is like hey hey hey! it’s radioactive red! and starts playing radioactive by imagine dragons and al, bright red, is like i’m going to kill you slowly and race, cheeky bastard, is like ha that’s kinda hot babe and winks and al’s just turning even more red

and ppl are like????? wait wait wait how is al the top did you see how flustered he got?

race n al literally laying on top of each other and full body cuddles but they both get so red when they hold hands and everyone’s like? you just literally sit in each other’s laps but ok

izzy these are fucking incredible i’m dying 😭

- al is such a little shit he totally would do that. race unplugs albert’s gaming monitor but the one with chat is still up and the cameras still going for the stream so everyone can see race whack al in the head with rolled up magazine from his desk and albert just throws race over his shoulder and spins around in circles while chat is loosing its fuckin mind

- whenever albert and race end up on different teams in a game race isn’t as good at and can’t just,,,,, math his way out (i.e. rocket league) he babbles in italian and it got to the point where al would get so distracted he would end up loosing the game cause he’s too busy internally going holyshitthatsreallyhotholyshitholyshit. albert went absolutely scarlet when he saw all the gifs of it and he’s sitting on the couch scrolling through twitter and race walks up behind him and leans down and whispers “why didn’t you mentioned you liked my italian” in italian and albert just ✨looses it✨

- SLEEPY 👏 ALBERT 👏 he doesn’t fall asleep on stream very often, but they do 12+ hour charity livestreams at least once a month so,,,, tired red is a common occurrence. he lives in a perpetual state of,,, ruffled? messy hair sticking up in every direction, a voice that always kinda sounds like he just woke up, constantly reaching for some form of affection from race that’s vaguely reminiscent of a toddler that just woke up from a nap between games, the like. he’s also a very deep sleeper, and it makes his already young face go from about,,,, 19? 20? to like 16 at best. he’s definitely getting better about seeing himself more accurately and all the fans think it’s so cute he doesn’t vehemently reject all of race’s compliments anymore.

- of course these two would be cute about having the same follower count. at one point someone follows albert but not race and race threatens to unfollow albert just to fix it, but about 10 seconds later the person follows him too and all balance is restored to the universe

- they’re 100% eachothers phone backgrounds. their lock screens is that cute thing where race has the half of the picture with albert in it and albert has the half of the picture with race in it and when you set their phones next to eachother in makes one picture. albert’s home screen is art jack made of them for his birthday. and race’s is a picture from the disney trip when al proposed.

- race is trying to pick albert’s teammates off from a distance, and he does fairly well for awhile, but as smart as he is race doesn’t have that much experience (especially compared to albert) so race’s teammates are dropping like flies literally ALL OVER the map and race is just like “?????? how the hell who is doing that” and albert is just silently chuckling to himself from his desk. eventually race is the only one left and albert finds him and just laughs maniacally while race dramatically falls out of his chair when he dies.

- y e s ok so albert blushes REALLY EASILY and race is,,,, race, so he’s honestly not that easy to embarrass and the general ‘red being flustered’ thing makes people confused how he’s the top. that is, until once race is laughing at how red albert is and albert just leans over and whispers something to race and race’s mouth snaps shut and his eyes get all wide and he just immediately changes the subject and albert has the smug look on his face and suddenly,,,, it all makes sense and that face race made gets so memed and albert laughs for 20 years over it

- honestly yeah it’s like

race: *kisses al’s neck and sits in his lap to try and distract him while albert keeps playing with a straight face*

also race: *can’t stop giggling for 5 minutes cause albert locked their pinky’s while showing him something and using the mouse*

~ or ~

albert: *carries race around the gaming room in victory or will randomly kiss him full on the mouth cause he just thinks he’s pretty*

also albert: *goes pink every time race calls him any sort of pet name, especially in italian*

this was written while also trying to keep track of the one year old and six year old i’m babysitting so i apologize for any random mistakes. no small children were harmed in the making of this post 😆

thank you for all of these i love them so much jdhdjdjd

#newsies #livesies #racetrack higgins #albert dasilva #never not read the tags #ralbert #spam ralbert gang #chaotic red and radioactive racer #youtuber ralbert #youtuber!au #youtuber au #jess is gonna love this one #i can feel it in my soul #THE WAY I LIVE FOR EMBARRASSED RALBERT #just make them in love but also very flustered #i need to add more stuff about albert’s tattoos too so if you wanna hear my whole rant about it lmk

[onf-headcanons]

First time (A Changyoon x Reader fic)

A/n : warning really long post , smut

 Hmm also I wont be specifically writing about hair color for Changyoon, even though I do love his short hair in Sukhimvit Swimming, (and I do picture that hair while writing) but I dont want to not being flexible in settings so I will be keeping a lot details vague this time.

Again English is not my mother tongue even tho its my second language. So please bear with me if my English or my writing is horrible and weird

OK story time let’s go

Quick setting, Changyoon is not your first boyfriend and you are not his either. But in terms of skinship, he is the first as your previous relationships you did not get to go too far.

You two washed up quite early. Having nothing else to do, you and Changyoon decided to watch a movie an streaming apps via TV. He lets you decide while he quickly whip up some popcorn at the kitchen and you just randomly pick one that has a high positive rating.

(It’s a romance genre but you did not knew there is a steamy make out scene in the movie that signifies advancement in characters relationship)

You and Changyoon cuddles on the couch, he is hugging you while you are hugging on a cushion. Enjoying and immersed at watching the characters in the movie in their slow burn relationship.

And then near the end of the movie comes the steamy scene. Changyoon, the usual easily flustered type, goes “Woah, Wah! Mwoyaaaa!! (What the heck!)”, and even lets go of you and covers his eyes with his hands

At the same time you goes “Oh dear.” and laughs nervously.

He suggests you to turn it off but you reply him there is just 10 more minutes left. Seeing you has no intention to turn it off, Changyoon licks his upper lips anxiously and before pursues his lips. His hands now are covering his ears and his eyes are shut tightly.

Seeing Changyoon doing that, you chuckled before turning the TV off. Finding it funny because it’s not like you two never kissed, also finding your BF is cute as he sure is very easily flustered. You reach out your hand to grab his wrist nearby his ear, and tell him you have already turned off the TV.

Upon hearing you, Changyoon opens one of his eyes to take a peek. Relieved when he sees the TV screen is black, then only he relaxes himself.

“Woah, thank god…things nearly get real bad…” Changyoon rubs his face with the palm of his hands while letting out a sigh.

Halfly want to tease him, you gets closer to him and ask “ Come on we are both adults, it was not a big deal.”

“No, its dangerous. Promise me, don’t ever watch stuff like this with other guys.” Changyoon makes a quick glance and then retorts you.

“Why would I watch that with other people?” You laughs because that comes out of nowhere, then another thought strikes you, “Are you being jealous?”

“No, not really… I mean…” Changyoon stutters. You wait for him patiently to find the best words to express himself, then he continues, “Well guys are beasts, thats why you need to more careful.”

“Okay.” you respond.

“Including me.” Changyoon drops instantly after your words ended. You raise your eyebrows upon hearing him. Changyoon finally looks at you in the eye and reaches out to cup your cheek before he goes, “ It will be a lie if I said I never had thoughts towards you.”

“So again, you need to more care-”

Before he could finish his words, his lips are taken by yours. Its just a peck, but since you literally leaped (lightly) to his chest, both of your upper body are pressed against each other with clothes as the only barricade between bare skin. You doing it because you suddenly feels that you want to do it.

It is rare for you to initiate, Changyoon nervously smiles at you when you push yourself backwards, looking at you unbelievingly. “You are the one who DOES NOT need to be THAT careful.” you look at him affectionately while assuring him.

“Did you.. chose that movie on purpose?” With one eyebrow raised, Changyoon voices out his doubt.

“I swear I really did not know about that passionate part in the movie.” You quickly explained that you are innocent.

And Changyoon lets out a sigh again as he knew you are telling the truth.

“This was never how I have imagined it to happen, but…” Changyoon frowns a bit and rubs his face with his palm again, his tone sound serious. “Y/N, can I?”

You promptly agree him and Changyoon pushes himself up. He pushes you up too. “I am serious. But not now, it does not need to be now. You can have a thought about it.”

You lightly bite you lower lip, pupils wandering a bit then you goes, “It is fine even if we do it right now.” 

Changyoon eyes got bigger due to your unexpected answer. “ Y/N, please think about it properly. What did I always tell you?”

If you did not know him well, you probably already shivering because of his sternly-piercing looking eyes. But after some time of interactions you could tell that he is just deeply concerned.

“You need to love yourself more.” you rephrase Changyoon’s words while he is repeating it in front of you. 

“I do take you words seriously, Changyoon. I love you that’s why I do.” You lower your gaze and reach out to place your hands on his and then you gaze at him again.

“I love and know myself well enough to tell you now, that I am ready and absolutely ok with it.” You sound firm, and you tighten you grip.

To your surprise, Changyoon suddenly pounces towards you, making you fell back to the couch. As your back comes in contact with the couch, your lips also make contact with Changyoon’s soft and plump lips.

He is slowly kissing your lower lip and occasionally giving it a gentle nibble while sucking it. His arms are resting beside your head, supporting his weigh, as if he is afraid of squishing you. But then he stops doing that as he moves his hands to cup your cheeks.

Then one of his hand slides to your chin, with a little force added, you let his tongue into your mouth. His breathing got heavier and you can feel it on your face as he exhales. As he is cupping your face, he is also holding you in place, making him had easy access towards you. You respond to him but he is much more passionate than usual. You could not keep up so you just let him lead you and had his way. You relax yourself by resting you arms on the couch.

The kiss was long and passionate, too long in your opinion, you lift you hands and wearily placed at his chest. Changyoon immediately understood the cue and he breaks off the kiss to catch his breathe, kisses your forehead while you are also gasping for air.

Seeing your moisty lips and unfocused gaze, he could not contain himself and leans towards you even before you get enough of oxygen.You whimpered the moment his lips touches yours. This time he did not go easier on you. It is slightly rougher and sloppier. Both his hands are at the sides of your neck, securing you while he immersed in his indulgence.

As he moves back, he frowns while biting a corner of his lower lips. You could tell he is frustrated. But not to the extent that he is annoyed.

“What… was that for?” You barely let your words out as you panted. “Payback?”

“Sorry… did I startled you?” His expression quickly turned to looking worried after he knew he lost his cool. You shake you head.

Changyoon lowers his head and places his forehead on yours, adjusting his breathing and trying to calm himself by keep reminding that it is your first time in his head. You can tell his switch is totally turned on, he is still wanting for another kiss since he keep tilting his head, trying to find an easy angle to land his lips on yours again. But he is hesitating (or maybe he is waiting for you to adjust your breathing)

You finally gain a bit of strength, reach out to cup his chubby cheeks and guide his lips to yours. As both of your lips pressed together for the third time, you wrap your arms around his neck, opening a bit of your mouth as well. He takes that as a sign that he could do more. So he engages another kiss with you once more.

While kissing, Changyoon slides one of his hand down towards the side of your waist and without warning, he hand dig through the fabric of your clothes and his palm comes contact to your skin. He starts to caress your belly moving his palm left and right, not moving upwards just yet. His hand movement had already made you arching your body as response. Unconsciously, loosen you arms let them fell on your chest. 

Changyoon break of the kiss and he takes out his hand underneath your shirt to grab your hand. He kisses your fingers before he whispers to your ear, “Want me to stop?” Such soft and attentive question but it also somewhat feels as if it is the final warning from him.

Overwhelmed by experiencing a whole new sensation for the first time, with your trembling lips and teary eyes, you shake your head.

Changyoon then kisses you forehead and your cheek. Later he pushes himself up to strip his shirt, revealing your favorite thing of his. His WHPH tattoo.

He helps you to take off your clothes while you cooperated. (Should you are female reader, you felt a bit nervous as you recalled that the underwear you are wearing were not the best ones you have. And that moment you kinda regret for making the decision without thinking another step further. But not for long) 

Changyoon adjusts his posture and you are now between his legs, he looks at you for a bit, not making any comments. But his hands are the opposite. He is touching you again. (Female reader part, he is caressing your chest with your bra on). While doing it, he is observing your reaction. 

He leans forward and lands kisses on your neck area. You do not know where to place your hands so you just rest them at the sides of your head, clutching the fabric of the couch tightly while letting out some whimpers.

(Changyoon reaches to the straps of your bra at your shoulders. Sliding them off and then slowly he pushes your bra downwards so that he can have easier access to your breast)

He give your earlobes a few nibbles and soft bites before he move further down to your collarbone. Unconsciously, your hands reach out and rest on his shoulders. Changyoon took it as a possible cue again and he raised his head to check on you again.You shake your head again to let him know it is fine to continue.

Then he kisses your chest while occasionally making eye contact with you. You jolted at his lips touches your skin. He did not stop there, and he starts to tease you using his tongue. He did not neglect the other one, as he plays your nipple with his fingers. The man on top of you letting out soft groans and grunts as he tries his best to please you. 

Conscious of him watching, you hold back your voice by biting your lower lip, your hands fell back on the couch again. But as Changyoon concentrates on what he is doing, you finally could not hold it in, letting out moans unintentionally riling him up even more. Feeling unfamiliar with what you are experiencing, you tried to change the mood by calling out your partner’s name.

“Hmm?” your partner responds

“Say something... would you?” you mutter out your thoughts. He pushes himself up again to look at you.  “This silence is making me embarrassed and it is killing me.”

“But wouldn’t talking too much kills the mood as well?” Changyoon reaches out to one hand of yours, locking his fingers with yours before pulling your hand towards to land a gentle kiss on the back of your hand. “Besides, I don’t like commenting much on someone’s body. You know that.” he continued as he lowers both his hand and yours and places them on your belly.

 While at it, he loosen his grip of your hand and slides his hand downwards. “ Can I?” he asks while kissing you on the side if your neck.

You gave him permission then he stops kissing you and advances his hand further, caressing your private part through your underwear. You don’t really have a hobby of touching yourself and it is the first time someone else doing it. Your hip starts to move and tremble as a response to his slow and sensual touch. “You are wet. I am glad you felt good.” “ Changyoon murmurs into your ear and it gave you chills towards your spine.

He strips off the final clothing of yours and touches you directly. While at it, he moves a bit and lowers his head to take your nipple in his mouth. And then,seeing he is distracting you successfully, he slowly inserts his finger into your entrance.

You jolt and exhale sharply as it is your first time something inserted into you. Unintentionally, your hip is squirming a bit as if trying to escape. Changyoon pushes himself up and places his free hand on your the side of your waist, he did not add any force, but weirdly it did hold you in place. 

Changyoon watches you closely trying to get all the cues from your facial expression. “It’s ok, relax. I am not hurting you.” he adds while advancing his finger further into you. You breathe heavily and relax yourself, he then adds in another finger into you. You just let him take the lead because you trust him understands what he is doing.

Then his fingers swept through a spot, it makes you tingle and your back arch in response. Due to a sudden reaction of yours, Changyoon look at your with a bit of disbelief. To confirm his doubt, he moves back to the spot and ask:” Was it here?”

It caught you off guard and you let out a loud moan as he slowly grinds his fingers towards the spot. “Aah,...” you whimpers in a low trembling voice while reaching your hand to his hand at your private part.

“Am I right?” Changyoon asks again as he presses the spot. Your legs jolt as a result of correct answer to his question. 

Changyoon lean towards you and kisses your forehead, “Should I stop?” he offers but he did not pull out his fingers, instead he is massaging the spot, making you moan even more. You shake your head and only mutter his name as he starts to thrust his fingers into you. 

“Does it feel good?” he confirms with you. You can only nod.

Without any word, Changyoon slides his free hand upwards to caress your chest, teasing your nipples while at it. He only quietly watches you  reacting to his touch.

Your hands are scratching and clutching the fabric of the couch, you are biting your lips hoping to lower down the noises you are making. It riles him up even more, “ Ya, don’t bite yourself. “ Changyoon notices and he leans down to kiss you on the lips. Your let out all your whimpers and moans into his mouth.

The whole new sensation was overwhelming for you. Your mind goes blank and tears rolling down from your eyes. It did not take long for you to experience your first climax. Changyoon breaks off the kiss and pushes himself up to check on your condition. 

Looking at your teary eyes, he wipes away your tears while smiling and feeling proud of himself. He pulls out his fingers from you. You are gasping heavily for air, still processing what has happened. Changyoon pats your head and praises you.

Changyoon reach out to your thighs, lifting one of it trying to spread your legs. You thought he will proceed just like that but he pauses. Then he pushes himself further up and eventually leaves the couch, rushing to the bedroom. You could not understand his actions and you use up all your might to push yourself up, wondering why did he leave.

He then returns with a few condoms, while looking a bit anxious and worried. He is nagging while walking to wards you, “This is why we should plan before doing it, what are you even thinking Changyoon-ah ...”

Seeing you already pushed yourself up, he let out a “Mwoya?” by habit.

You only look at him in a puzzling look.  “I did not have lubricant, and these are the only condoms I have.” he says as he walks near you.

“It might hurts.” he warns. “Are you sure you still wanna do it?” he gently pats your head while waiting you to answer.

You could argue that you are not thinking straight or, you just don’t want him to hesitate. As your breathing get calmer, you reply him while raising your eyebrow playfully, “Well I am just not sure if we should do it on the couch though...”

Changyoon gets your intention immediately and he retorts you with  “Ya, I am being serious here!”

Then he pauses again, you can tell he is thinking. You lean forward, enough distance to reach out his hand and pulls him towards you. In no time, Changyoon is on top of you again.

He knows he could not win you, so he lightly pinches you on your cheek with his free hand. “You asked for it, so don’t blame me later ok?”

He pushes himself up to strip his underwear. You take a condom from him and opens it. Changyoon then takes the condom from you and puts it on. You stare at him and unconsciously swallowed saliva due to nerviousness. (Of course you also felt glad that he is up)

Once he is done, his hands are now at the side of your thighs. You cooperated as he lightly yanks your hip upwards, grabs a cushion to place it under your hip.  He then adjusts your pose so that now you are lying down on your side and one of your leg is resting on his shoulder.

You could feel his bulge come in contact with your skin as you two are now very close to each other. Changyoon guides himself to your entrance, massaging your entrance with his tip so that you can loosen up and take him in.

“Don’t look if you are scared. “ he advises, then he inhales deeply as he slowly enters. He pushes himself in while landing some kisses at your inner thigh. 

 As the pain spreads from inside you, you curl yourself a bit and Changyoon stops advancing. He quickly asks he if you are alright and plans waits for your frown to loosen up a bit before proceeding further in. You nods as a sign for him to continue.

With his at your waist holding you in place, Changyoon gradually move his hip towards you until he has himself all inside you. As he was entering you, he was so concentrated at not hurting you that his lips are pouting unconsciously (and frowning as well).   Once he had everything in, he let out a groan of relief.

You are trembling because you could feel the heat of what is inside you. Uncomfortable is not the word, but it does make you a feeling slightly unease. Changyoon lowers your leg at his shoulder and bends down. His hands let go of your waist. One finds your hand that was clutching couch’s fabric while another hand cups your cheek and he kisses you again.

As he is kissing you, you could feel he is getting bigger inside you. Your cheeks flushes red immediately and you push him off to break the kiss.

“Hey! LEE CHANGYOON!!!” you wail out of disbelief.

“Sorry! But I can’t help it!” Changyoon exclaims. He then rests his forehead at your shoulder and buries his face. He is breathing heavily, as if doing that would lessen the burden you are having now. You reach out to his nape and give him some gentle stroke him to give him assurance.

Changyoon ask you if he can move, and you tell him to do it. He starts to slowly pull himself out and thrust in while his head still resting on your shoulder. He has a good memory of where your sensitive spot is, once he hits it, the tone of your moans changes immediately. 

Changyoon also letting out soft grunts and groans, as if he is harmonizing with your voice.

You could not help but focusing on his movements and his voice, and your voice starts to get louder. You are aware of it and you try to hold back but it was effortless. He does not deny your voice really riles him up. He pushes himself up so that he can observe you. 

Seeing you beet red from your face to your neck, he curses as he increases his pace. With that you lose your composure and just responded at every thrust and every touch where his palm lands.

“Y/N-ah, are you feeling good?” he asks you as thrusting. You could tell from his tone that he is worried if he is hurting you or he is not good enough.

You reach out to his hand that was the nearest you could grasp, interlocking his fingers with yours. “You... are the best.” you reply him and kisses the back of his hand before rest both hands at the side of your head. 

With his free hand supporting his weight, Changyoon lowers himself to kiss your chest, “Let’s cum together ok?” he suggests before he focusing on pleasing you.

You tighten and loosen your grip as additional response to his thrusts. Your could not care about those embarrassing voice you made anymore, and fully succumb yourself to the ecstasy your partner trying his best giving you. 

You two finally climaxed after several thrusts. Your lower body feels numb and heavy. Changyoon relaxes himself and let his weight lands on top of you. His heavy breathing roams around your ear. Also breathing heavily, you loosen you grip towards his hand and throw your arms around his shoulders, hugging him even though you are now weary,

You kisses him on his ear while at it. Changyoon occasionally letting out  groans while he is catching his breath.Then he pushes himself up and pulls himself out. He finally “come to senses” when he sees what a mess you both has made. (Yup the couch fabric is soiled and wet)

You pushes yourself up and he hurriedly helps you up. You are dazed and drowsy for no reason. Changyoon asks you if you need a glass of water or anything. You just wrap your arms around his waist and pulls him closer towards as a sign for him not to leave just yet.

He is surprised at you being a bit clingy. But he hugs you back and pats your head. “Did you enjoyed it?” Changyoon asks you timidly. “ I hope I was not being rough.”

You shake your head and lift up your head to kiss his cheek. “Yes.” you reply to him

“I love you.” you add

He pats your head again and with a loving tone, “I love you too.”

A/N: Thank you for all who reads until the end. Anon that requests this, sorry that it took so long. Actually I already has an idea of writing changyoon smut before you sending the request, but I really not content of my initial structure at all. I had to let idea slowly mature as time pass so that I do not look like repeating what I wrote.

#onf #onf smut #lee changyoon #e-tion #onf e-tion #e-tion smut #changyoon smut #onf changyoon #bf!onf #onf imagine #onf imagines

[antomec]

i am yours, so hold me tight

i am off hiatus? who the fuck knows. anyway you can also find this on AO3 and FF.net!

words: 1409 pairing: canalu summary: "i saw you sniffing that hoodie," lucy says without preamble. "please tell me you're not giving me stinky clothes."

the first time cana is introduced to lucy, she's sporting a raging hangover and drinking far too many espresso shots to cure it. mira – what a dear – props up cana's sunglasses and shields her eyes with her hand. "this," she announced proudly, "is my best friend cana."

cana weakly waves, eyes still scrunched up. "hello." she can vaguely make out blonde hair and ribbons, and an air of nervousness. cana always been good at noticing that sort of stuff.

"cana alberona," she introduces herself once more, pushing away mira's hand. "i'm in economics, and i like drinking. you?"

mira sits lucy down and titters from beside her. "cana can drink anyone under the table. and i mean that. i think the only one she can't beat is her dad."

cana rounds on her. "hey! no mention of him. it's only because of him that i'll die early of a damaged liver."

and that's when lucy laughs. it's also when cana remembers that she falls for cute girls too easily. really. the bar is very low.

lucy digs around in her backpack and brings out a little juice box. "it's nothing alcoholic, but i figure you should hydrate yourself, what with that hangover you have," she says.

oh, the bar is so, so low.

"i told you not to over do it and then what do u do! over do it!" cana isn't furious, she's just playing the part, but lucy's sad eyes and pout makes her want to baby her, and cana just doesn't think she has it in her to get out of it feelings unscathed if she tried to baby lucy. "okay you dumbass, what's your room number?"

lucy mumbles something too quiet to hear, and cana gently jostles her. "you're so mean!" lucy wails. "i said i don't remember. i'm too drunk to remember."

cana looks heavenward. curse her heart for being weak to pretty girls.

"okay. okay." she breathes deeply. "mira is with her girlfriend, so i'm not calling her, natsu is still at the party so he's pretty much wasted." cana looks at lucy. "hey, would you be comfortable sleeping over at mine?"

and maybe it's a trick of the light, but cana swears she sees a little smile playing on lucy's lips. it's gone as quick as a flash however, and cana's left questioning herself.

lucy seems to lose any sort of inebriation however, when she looks into cana's eyes and firmly nods. cana makes a face, and tells her, "alright then. sleepover time!"

later, when lucy is in a spare change of clothes and curled up peacefully in cana's bed, cana will wonder why she didn't try calling lucy's roommate juvia instead of giving up her own bed.

the rain is so cold. cana hates the rain. it's also why she always has an umbrella and a spare shirt in her trunk. she got caught in the rain once on a day where she had a presentation in class, and she'd never been more mortified than that day, presenting in a class full of twenty something's with wet hair and a half dry t-shirt.

she shakes out her umbrella and steps out of her car only to see a blond whirlwind nearly crash into her. i'm sorry!" the little ball of hair says, and cana takes a second to figure out who it is.

"lucy? is that you?" cana ventures.

lucy looks up, and that's when cana realises that lucy's wearing white. actual white clothes on a rainy day.

"oh my god, you're drenched!" cana exclaims. "get inside the car, i'll give you some clothes to wear!" she unlocks the car and all but shoves lucy into it. "lucy bangs on the window. "this is kidnapping!" she yells goodnaturedly.

cana grins, and rounds to the back of the car. she pops the trunk open, and fishes out the pale blue hoodie she has stashed for emergencies. she closes the trunk while she discreetly sniffs the hoodie. it doesn't smell bad but it's the only change of clothes she has so it'll have to do for now.

"i saw you sniffing that hoodie," lucy says without preamble. "please tell me you're not giving me stinky clothes."

"you brat, be glad with what you get!" cana throws the hoodie at lucy in the backseat. her face softens. "if it does smell i have some deodorant in the glove box."

"oh thank goodness, i was wondering how to turn this magnificent but stinky hoodie down," lucy jokes, and cana blindly swats at her from the driver's seat. cana hands the deodorant over anyway.

"hurry up," she says instead. "i think we're both kinda late to class."

cana walks lucy upto her building even though it's a bit out of her way, because of course the little goblin doesn't have an umbrella. cana assures lucy that it's no big deal, but lucy doesn't relent and steals cana"s phone to type in her phone number. "text me, she says, " i'll treat you to dinner as thanks."

she doesn't give time for cana to reply as she quickly skips away.

"cana, stop laughing this is awful!" lucy's tinny voice comes through cana phone placed on the table. cana is mid laughter, and trying her best not to mistype her assignment due that night.

"you have to admit," cana begins. "it's kinda funny."

"no it is not! lucy says shrilly, and cana dissolves into giggles again.

the scene is this: lucy is locked out of her apartment ("that i pay half the rent for!" she tells cana) because her roommate has a "friend" over ("she had the nerve to use quotations,cana!). cana calls to ask for lucy's notes from a shared lecture, and she's now subjected to a ten minute whining of how lucy has nowhere to stay.

which is a lie of course, lucy is always welcome at cana's. lucy knows this, and cana knows lucy knows this, so this is basically lucy trying to wheedle an invitation out of cana just for the sake of it.

well tough luck if cana is going to give it to her that quick.

"aw poor baby," cana croons instead. "do you want a bandaid and a kiss to make you feel better?"

lucy sputters on the other end and lets out an indignant squawk. "no! what i want is revenge because juvia knows that i have a lab exam tomorrow and i need to get enough sleep for it!"

"wait," cana pauses typing. "your lab final is tomorrow?"

"uh huh." lucy says. cana can almost hear the pout in her voice.

cana sighs. "alright, you've cracked me open like a walnut. would you like to stay over?"

"yes of course, you're the best, thank you so much!" lucy says in a rush, and cana snickers at the change in tone.

"okay then, make your way over," cana says, trying her best to keep her smile out of her words.

lucy does treat her to dinner soon, and cana acts like a lovestruck teenager trying to decide what to wear. she throws out her whole wardrobe looking for her lucky jeans ("yes but lucky for what?," mira asks. "what exactly are you hoping for here," she adds wiggling her eyebrows for good measure until cana pushes her off the bed.)

it's a smooth affair, and while there are awkward pauses in conversation, cana thinks it's nice. lucy is an avid talker, and there isn't a thing under the sun she doesn't know a little about, and when cana tells her about the brewery back home that her dad runs, her eyes are as big as dinner plates as she says "that's so cool!"

lucy doesn't divulge much about herself, merely mentioning that her family is estranged and not on good terms with her. cana leaves it at that, and instead brings up her classes as a distraction. lucy brightens up at that, and describes all her worst teachers in the funniest way possible that cana snorts sparkling water through her nose.

and when the bill is paid and they walk back to their apartments, cana hesitates but does it anyway. she sneaks a hand through lucy's and interlaces their fingers together. lucy to her credit doesn't break stride. instead she comments, "i was wondering how long it would take for you to do that." she looks up at cana and grins widely.

and cana grins back at her too.

#canalu #cana alberona #lucy heartfilia #tttf writes #fairy tail #fanfiction #wlw #wlw fanfiction #i am yours so hold me tight [canalu] #ftlgbtales

[thewebcomicsreview]

Normally I open up the Homestuck 2 liveblog with a tongue-in-cheek comment about how reading HS2 is pain, but I just watched the debate and HS2 looks incredible by comparison, so let’s see if this good mood carries over. Looks like we’re on Candyland, too, Candy updates tend to be better (or at least bad in a funny way) than the oft-boring Meat updates, and personally, I think “The Omega Kids fuck around” is the best part of HS2 by yards.

Man, that lamp is almost perfectly positioned to draw a line through the image separating the two scenes (the dialogue for which is on two separate columns), but it’s just the tiniest bit off-center. I wonder if that was intentional and mobile-responsiveness is just a cruel mistress. It’s a cute touch, if so. I suppose the door (and the photos, which are the same height as the door) also serves the same purpose of having the two scenes be sectioned off. I don’t really know a lot about “scene composition” so maybe I should stay in my wheelhouse, but I think it’s divided very nicely

HARRY: and some of us aren't gods and shit. JOHN: i'm detecting a hint of judgement in your voice, there, harry anderson JOHN: don't you enjoy being a part of all this? finally getting to be in the thick of it all?

John, always dense, has not picked up on Harry Anderson’s demotion to Harry. He’s also inserting a lot of his own desires onto Harry, here, too. Vrissy is the one who wanted to be in the thick of it all (thematic idea to stick a pin into to see if it plays out: John should be mentoring Vrissy and Vriska should be mentoring Harry. Some evidence that HS2 is building this idea, but not a lot yet)

HARRY: now YOU look like you're hiding some extra commentary. JOHN: oh, i don't need to burden you with all the bureaucratic stuff, it's boring.

You gotta subscribe to John’s $20/mo Patreon tier for that, Harry.

JOHN: because here i am, sitting in the dugout, same as you. HARRY: in the dugout? JOHN: oh, or, uh... JOHN: what's a metaphor you might like better... HARRY: no, JOHN: i'm like the uhh...understudy. HARRY: dad. no, jesus, you don't have to do this. JOHN: or i got cast in as babysitter number 2 when i had auditioned for, i dunno, HARRY: yeah, please, i got the baseball metaphor. HARRY: i'm not a complete fucking nerd.

John doesn’t really “get” theater kids, I get. It makes me think a little of how John’s dad thought John was massively into clowns. Also, this is a cute.

JOHN: it's been really nice to get to spend so much time with you. HARRY: um. yeah, it's not so bad. HARRY: anyway, before you ruffle my hair or anything, it looks like things are getting a bit heated between the vriskas over there. HARRY: maybe we should offer them a snack to bring the mood back down? JOHN: me, mess up your hair when you’ve worked so hard on that look? i do know you at least that well, harry anderson HARRY: thank god.

This is also cute. Harry maybe the only person in the entire cast of Homestuck or Homestuck 2 to have a semi-normal relationship with his parents.

Speaking of semi-symmetry, the line where Harry says how happy he is to stay home almost lines up perfectly with Vriska being furious that she has to stay home. I wonder again if that’s a coincidence of if someone had a really clever idea that didn’t make it fully intact through editing (or was considered not worth the effort). 

VRISKA: How are you so calm right now? Your lusii were training you, right? And you’re a troll, you’re definitely five times stronger than a human! And if you’re my clone, you are way more 8adass than little miss Fussy Fangs.

Vriska is making several false assumptions here, but the most interesting one is that Vrissy is Vriska’s clone. She’s not. She’s descended from Vriska, and takes after Vriska very strongly, but it’s not a one-to-one thing.

VRISSY: 8ut I guess this Situation is Kind of Serious? VRISSY: There’s a whole Plan and Stuff Like that. VRISKA: Clearly not a good plan, 8ecause then I would 8e part of it!

Vriska.jpg

VRISKA: That’s just even more indication that they don’t know what they’re doing! Lalonde and Maryam have had however many sweeps to get older and stupider, 8ut from where I’m standing, it was literally only a few days ago that I was their commander! I am primed for the 8attlefield!

Okay, this line is across from John saying he’s in the dugout. There is absolutely an intentional, if not one-to-one strict, mirroring of these two conversations that’s actually really neat. I should go back to the other times HS2 has had conversations formatted like this to see if this mirroring has been happening all along. It’s a really good use of the format! I like this a lot! 

JOHN: so anyway, as you can see, this would have worked just fine! HARRY: no i think karkat’s right. this looks like shit, dad. JOHN: you know, me letting your earlier use of the word "fuck" slide wasn't a blanket approval for all cursing in front of me. HARRY: sorry. HARRY: try not to make such a shit plan, and i won't call it that. JOHN: haha wow.

The other thing I like is the John/Harry dynamic. 

HARRY: it's not like i think i'm any better! HARRY: i mean, i still can't believe i told vrissy and them to bring a dead celebrity to school. HARRY: what was i THINKING. JOHN: you were thinking it sounded hilarious! JOHN: but yeah, in hindsight, maybe not the best call. JOHN: maybe it’s genetic? HARRY: yeah. HARRY: i kinda can’t believe we’re all still alive, actually. HARRY: and how did YOU make it this far, being so bad at this? JOHN: i had my friends with me, i guess.

John your friends repeatedly tried to kill you and succeeded at least twice. 

He’d spent so long seeing mostly the best parts of Roxy in Harry Anderson. He forgot, he guesses, to look for himself in there, too. And if what they have in common right now is a lack of strategic foresight, hey, he’ll take it.

I’m slowly developing a theory that John is subconsciously the narrator of Candy, given how everything suddenly started going John’s way after Calliope left (and how the narrator seemed to really hate Gamzee last chapter). Remember, John has spoken in narration before in HS1, but never seemed to realize he was doing it. I probably need to essay this theory out at some point, but not now.

Oh, hey! Jane does have goons! And they’ve slightly change the way they draw Rose’s hair, so her head isn’t a perfect circle with lines on it. This looks much better. 

JANE: I haven't given a political speech in years, Ms. Lalonde. I don't know what you're referring to. I'm just a simple business woman. JADE: right with her own talk show JADE: and multi billion dollar merchant company and lobbying groups! JANE: That's what a business woman is, Jade, dear.

I know that this is supposed to be Capitalism Bad, but “You claim to be a businesswoman when you own a merchant company!”. Jade. Come on. This reads less as Jane going “Of course I’m evil, I’m a CEO” and more that Jade literally doesn’t know what a business woman is. 

JANE: You are on my territory, in the presence of my secret police, laying your hand on my investment.

Jane you don’t own “territory” do you not know what a businesswoman is either?

JANE: Your ship is in contested airspace. You will land, whereby it will be confiscated by the Royal Human Guard. After that you will be taken into custody. 

CONTESTED BY WHOM, JANE? WHO THE FUCK IS THE WAR BETWEEN?!

JADE: shut the fuck up for a minute and look up!

There’s a BIG-ASS spaceship like ten feet in front of you! Did you not notice until Jade pointed it out?

Also why does the Rebellion ship have the Crockercorp prongs on it?

JANE: Or have you forgotten who has been paying for her schooling and taking charge of her introduction into society? JADE: i never asked you to do that! JADE: you offered! JADE: so stop calling me ungrateful for not sucking your dick over things i never asked for!

Sorry again, Jade, are you implying that you wouldn’t have given your daughter an education had Jane not offered? “Rose and Jade entrusted their daughter to Jane, who they were at war with” is an enigma of a plot point.

The world is watching her be dressed down by a couple blood traitor rebels, one of which has very prominent dog ears. Jane wonders if either of them are even recognizable to the assembled as two of the old gods. One of her PR managers had recommended that she keep her look as static as possible, so that people can always recognize her as Jane Crocker, Captain of Industry, Creator of Earth C, Maintainer of Peace and Plenty.

Jade has always had dog ears what the fuck? I guess this is supposed to be Jane’s warped thinking.

So, anyway, Kanaya fake-holds Tavvy hostage, Jane buys the threat as real and they build up like Jane is going to sacrifice her own son for PR points but she ultimately stands down and lets everyone go. It’s left intentionally vague whether or not she was always going to do this, or if she didn’t want to do it in front of Jake, or if the presence of Jake stirred something in her that made her change her mind. I like the ambiguity. 

This was a very “Homestuck 2″ update. The plot of kind of nonsense, but it’s carried by the character interactions and a bit of cleverness.

#Homestuck 2 #Homestuck 2 liveblog #Homestuck

[junhyukiscute]

drabble 4 with hyunjae and could you make it very fluffy? :3

hello, soulmate (the boyz hyunjae x reader)

author note: hyunjae could literally be breathing and he’d still be the most handsome man

drabble 4: “i don’t know how I managed to live so long without you.”

(note: bold - hyunjae, normal - you)

soulmates were a common phenomenon in your world. some were connected by a red string of fate, others were connected by taste. you, my dear friend, were connected with your soulmate through your thoughts. kind of basic, but at least you didn’t have to suffer through vague dreams like your friend eric, or their taste buds like sunwoo. the only downhill to your bond was that you couldn’t tell each other your names because it didn’t work like that. fate would eventually just work itself out.

it was kind of nice, you guys had conversations whenever you could. your soulmate was a college student who was trying their best in become a vet and worked very hard. despite the stress of studying in the medical field, you would pop up and try to crack jokes so he could have a little laugh. needless to say, your interactions with him made his day.

“ew! my soulmate just ate mustard and broccoli,” sunwoo screamed at the lunch table.

“no one cares,” eric shot back.

as you watched your best friends bicker, you thought to yourself, idiots.

ive been stuck listening to my friends argue about how much carrots they can shove up their nose. im gonna shove kevin off a cliff.

don’t do it buddy, you’ll be sent to jail for attempted murder. how will we be able to see each other if you’re in jail?

well if i make the news, you’ll be able to know what i look like and we can meet up at my cell.

you chuckle out loud which causes the bickering to stop.

“what’s gotten you so cheery?” sunwoo eyes you suspiciously.

“shes probably talking to her soulmate,” eric replies. eric makes a kissy face at sunwoo, “hEy bAbe i wAs jUst tHiNkIng oF yOu cAuse You Know, wE cAn tALk to EacH oTher!!”

sunwoo laughs at eric’s impression of you, and starts to laugh even harder after you threw a baby carrot smack in the middle of eric’s face.

“seriously though (y/n), you’re pretty lucky to have a convenient bond. are you close to meeting him yet?” sunwoo questionied.

you sighed,” no, not yet. i wanna meet him soon though, all i know is that he goes to some university in seoul and likes coffee at the cafe near his campus.”

eric’s eyes widen, “wait, there’s a twosome coffee shop near this university down the street!”

sunwoo gasped and shook eric by the shoulders, “eric, you’re useful for once!!” ignoring the offended look on eric’s face, he turns to you, “once school’s done, it’s gonna be spring break. you know what that means?”

“movie nights and sleepovers while we procrastinate on our homework?” you questioned.

“no, you idiot, we’re gonna go to that coffee shop everyday so you could see your soulmate!” sunwoo says.

once it registered in your mind, you gasped, “wait, we might be able to see my soulmate?!”

“i knew my days of skipping school would come in handy one day,” eric smirked.

time skip

you were in your last period, daydreaming as your teacher lectured.

aish.. i’m really craving an iced americano right now.

the bell had rung and you ran out the classroom to meet up with sunwoo and eric, who coincidentally had the last period together. “guys, my soulmate likes iced americanos. we have to go, NOW,” you said. eric and sunwoo nodded before you guys dashed off to the cafe down the street of your guys school.

the door opened and bell chimed, the baristas greeted you as you guys walked in. 

“okay, i’ll keep watch by sitting at that table in the corner. since you invited us here, you’re paying, (y/n),” sunwoo said as he walked off to the said table.

“while you’re ordering, i’ll keep watch for anyone who’s ordering an iced americano. by the way, i don’t drink coffee so can you get a whole chocolate cake? we’re gonna be here for a while, thanks (y/n)! you’re the best,” eric patted your shoulder and shoved you in line.

you cried on the inside as you ordered two iced mochas and a whole chocolate cake for here. the cashier looked at you weirdly, “and your name?”

“(y/n),” you said and looked at his nametag, “thanks... kevin?!”

kevin looked taken aback before eyeing you, “do i know you?”

“oh.. haha,” you sheepishly laughed, “sorry, um.. it just sounded familiar..”

“oookkaaayyy, that’ll be 40,000 won,” he said as you handed him your card, “we’ll call you when your drinks are ready...”

after he dissappeared to the back, you ran up to sunwoo and slammed your hands on the table, making him scream out of fright, “guys. i think that barista is my soulmate’s friend. he talked about some dude named kevin.”

“oh for real?? ask him if he has a friend that likes iced americanos!!” eric said energetically as he scarfed the cake.

“yeah, like he probably doesn’t have 50 friends who like iced americanos. what if he doesn’t even have friends?” sunwoo replied as he rolled his eyes.

“(y/n)! your drinks are ready,” kevin called out.

“ask him!” eric whispered out loud.

as you walked towards the counter to pick up the drinks, you stood there and looked at him. kevin, already a bit weirded out by your behavior from earlier asked, “do you need anything else...?”

“do you have any friends that like iced americanos?” you questioned.

“okaaayy so I don’t know if you know this but my friends are in college, you’re a high schooler based on your uniform. im not gonna partake in pedophilia.”

“listen man, our friend has a soulmate who goes to this cafe and orders a nasty battery acid drink during his break so god help us!” eric shouted as sunwoo tried to desperately hold him back.

“we’re seniors,” you added in quickly.

kevin sighed and pinched his nose bridge while he thought hard, “are you sure it’s this cafe?”

“yes, im sure because he goes to a cafe near his college, and there’s a college near here, right?” you said.

“yeah...” kevin deeply sighed, “i have a few friends who drink iced americanos.”

“who were you with earlier when you tried to see how much carrots you could shove up your nose?”

kevin chokes on his spit, “how did you know that?!”

“im connected through my soulmate by thoughts,” you replied.

he gasped in realization, “wait, my friend named-“

“kevin, get back to work and stop flirting with the customer!! one more warning and you’re fired!!” a voice boomed from the back.

kevin jumped before looking at you sheepishly, “sorry (y/n), i gotta go,” and ran off to the cashier station where an annoyed lady was waiting.

you groaned before grabbing the drinks and plopping down at the table.

“so all we know is that he does have a friend who’s your soulmate but we didn’t get a name,” sunwoo said. you guys all sighed in unison before sadly sipping on the drinks.

spring break went past quickly, and there was no sign of your soulmate visiting at the coffee shop. heck, you couldn’t even hear his thoughts anymore.

“it’s okay, (y/n), you’ll see him eventually,” eric reasoned as sunwoo pat your back.

you sighed deeply as you sipped on an iced americano at the cafe. this sucks, why can’t my soulmate just come in and order already?

at seoul university (lol just go with it), hyunjae was writing notes down at the library when kevin strolled in with Jacob and plopped down at the table.

kevin sighed dramatically before leaning back on his chair, “there’s this trio of high schoolers who won’t stop coming to the cafe im working at and they keep staring at me!! the girl says that her soulmate goes there and orders an iced americano, kinda creepy but i appreciate her dedication to meet him. says they have a soulmate link by their thoughts, isn’t that kinda like yours?”

hyunjae mumbles, “an iced americano sounds great. haven’t been able to get it from your work since ive been studying for finals” before a voice in his head says this sucks, why can’t my soulmate just come in and order already? hyunjae drops his pen in shock. “wait, kevin, are they still there?” hyunjae questioned.

“hm, probably, why?” kevin replies. the two piece the information together before kevin gasps as he punches Jacob out of excitement. “oh my god, is that your soulmate?! go get them tiger!!” kevin cheered with Jacob (who was very confused). hyunjae packed up his stuff and dashed out of the library and to the cafe. once he reached the cafe and pushed open the door widely, a few customers glanced but went back to their own business.

hyunjae slowly strolls before saying rather loudly, “can i please order an iced americano?” while subtlely glancing around the shop. a few gasps were heard and he found a trio of high school uniforms. he made eye contact with you and felt like time had stopped.

there you were, in all your glory, with slightly ruffled up hair and dark eye bags. even though you looked like you just woke up, you still looked incredibly cute. his heart beat erratically at the sight of your beautiful self before he gulped and walked up to you.

sunwoo and eric caught wind of the situation and shoved each other out of the table as you were trying to hold back a smile. hyunjae cleared his throat because thinking, i wish my soulmate knew how cute they are.

you grinned and said, “i wish my soulmate knew how they are too,” you stood up and held out your hand, “hi soulmate. im (y/n). it’s really, really nice to meet you.”

hyunjae smiles as he took your hand and pulled you into an embrace. “i don’t know how i managed to live so long without you.” he breathed out as he wrapped his hands around your frame. “im hyunjae, but you can just call me yours from now on.”

#the boyz #tbz #the boyz imagines #the boyz scenarios #the boyz fluff #hyunjae #hyunjae fluff #sunwoo #eric #sangyeon #younghoon #q #kevin #jacob #hwall #juyeon #new #haknyeon

[forehead-enthusiast]

Drowning

Pairing: Lifeguard!Jaehyun x Reader

Genre: Fluff 

Word Count: 1.1k

Summary: A stupid friend, a stupid plan, a really hot lifeguard- what could go wrong?

A/N: this was meant to be about johnny but like me better hit kinda different you feel me?? basically just an extra long blurb about dumb cute pool antics :D anyway i hope you guys like it!!!

.

“Listen, I’m just saying, if he thinks you’re drowning, he will save you. It’s literally his job. And then you could pretend to need CPR, too, if you catch my drift.” Your friend wiggled her eyebrows, clearly proud of her plan.

“This is why I don’t tell you things.”

You deeply regretted letting slip how cute you thought Jaehyun, the local lifeguard was. She hadn’t stopped suggesting you try and drown yourself since.

Friendship at its finest, you supposed.

When her meddling eyes weren’t watching you, you’d sneak glances at the aforementioned man, squinting at the sunlight glaring off his skin. It was almost unfair how gorgeous he looked, sitting up in his tower, blowing his whistle at squealing children. He’d always smile when he’d tell them off for running. It was a painfully endearing smile, and you sighed wistfully without realizing.

“...And she looked at his glistening muscles, practically drooling, as her friend watched, but she was so lost in his biceps that-”

“Stop narrating!” You smacked your friend’s shoulder, mortified that she’d noticed your gazing. “I wasn’t even looking at his arms, I was looking at his cute smi...le.”

Wrong answer.

Your friend toppled backwards, absolutely cackling. “Oh, you’ve got it bad bad. Whaaaat, his smile make your heart flutter? Send butterflies to your tummy? Make you wanna drop down on one knee right now?” She held her sides, trembling, all too amused at her own teasing. You imagined a meteor falling out of the sky and crushing her.

“Shut up already.”

“Listen,” she wheezed, “He’d probably smile right at you if he thought he saved your life, right? Isn’t that worth drinking some gross pool water? For his smile that you just oh-so-looove?”

“Your logic is… just the worst. Besides, I can swim!” You hoped she wouldn’t notice that you didn’t deny the “love” thing she said.

“What’s your point?”

 .

Jaehyun sat awkwardly a little ways away, and pretended he couldn’t hear every word you said. It was hard not to- neither you nor your friend were very quiet. If he was being honest, though, he probably would’ve noticed even if you’d been more discreet. He’d found himself time and time again looking for you unconsciously, and felt rather remiss when he couldn’t find you. On occasion, you’d lock eyes across the pool, and your shy smile and nod never failed to make him feel a little bashful himself. 

Your voice seemed to stand out to him amidst all the other screams and shouts, and before he realized, he could pick it out without even trying. That seemed like it was backfiring now. He touched his arms awkwardly when he heard your friend’s comments, feeling self conscious in a way he couldn’t quite explain. He flushed when he heard you mention his smile. 

He zoned out for a bit, absentmindedly yelling at some particularly rowdy teenagers, and wondered if he should say something to you. Of course, that would be embarrassing for both parties, but wouldn’t it be more embarrassing if he just let you keep going? Or would-

“Help, she’s drowning, oh no.”

He looked up at the sound of your friend’s very poor acting, and saw you floundering in the pool. You cursed your friend for shoving you in when you weren’t paying attention, and flailed, trying to right yourself. However, before you could gather your bearings, you felt a somehow-familiar arm wrap around your waist and pull you to the surface.

“A-are you okay?”

“Uh… yep.”

You stared unblinkingly into Jaehyun’s eyes, still processing the fact that he was right in front of you and that the warmth you were feeling pressed against you was his. Your friend’s taunting voice rang out in your mind as you thought about the arm holding you securely. You went temporarily deaf, all the noise from the crowds fading away as you focused your senses entirely on him. You didn’t even notice your friend giving you an enthusiastic thumbs-up from behind his back.

“Y-y’know, I’m, I’m actually good, you can let go, I, uh, I can swim.” And even if you couldn’t, water was less of a threat to your life than a face this beautiful being so close to yours.

“Yeah, I know.”

He knows? Knows what? That you can swim? How? Well, granted, you were a grown human, and one that he’d seen swimming many times before, so you convinced yourself it wasn’t weird he’d said that. You mutely allowed him to lift you from the water, and hoped you weren’t too heavy for him to lift when he left the pool. He helped you, as unnecessary as it was, towards a bench in the shade and let you sit down.

“Uh, I’m fine. I wasn’t actually drowning.”

“I know.”

He couldn’t think of any other way to respond, and panicked internally at his unintentional vagueness.

“W-what do you mean, you know?”

That was a hard question to answer.

“Well, I heard you. Talking. With your friend?” He peeked up to look at your expression, which could only be described as petrified. He laughed despite the tense air that had settled, relaxing a bit. It almost looked like your face couldn’t decide whether to go completely pale or completely red.

“Don’t worry! I’m not, like, mad or anything. Besides,” He looked away again, pushing some of his dripping hair off his forehead, “I probably wouldn’t have heard if I hadn’t been paying attention to you. But I was! Because I think you’re cute. Too.”

Your brain had switched off about two minutes ago, and you were not registering a single word he was saying now. He heard, he heard, he heard, oh dear God. Jaehyun waved his hand in front of your face, impressed by how completely blank it was, and chuckled. He looked around for any hint of what to do, and saw your friend very obviously spying from a short distance. She waved brightly, and when he waved back, stunned, she nodded in mock thankfulness. Then, with a sharp salute, she jumped back in the water, leaving him more confused and embarrassed than he’d ever been.

At least she gave him an idea.

He leaned forward, pressing a chaste kiss to your dripping forehead. You flinched, and finally snapped back to reality, only to clap a hand to your forehead and stutter madly.

“You- why- my- me- why did you-”

“C...CPR?” 

“O-on my forehead?”

He flushed. It seemed a lot less dumb in his head, but now that he’d done it, he just wanted to drown himself too. A second later, he felt a soft touch to his cheek, and looked back at you to see you with your face buried in your hands.

“...My shift here ends soon. Do you want to go… somewhere? With me?”

“Yes. Please.”

“You guys are so lame! Kiss her for real, coward!”

“SHUT UP!”

Jaehyun still yelled at you for running as you chased that nosy idiot down.

#jaehyun #nct 127 #jaehyun fanfic #neowritingsnet #jaehyun fanfiction #jaehyun fluff #nct 127 fanfic #nct 127 fanfiction #nct 127 fluff #nct 127 reactions #nct 127 au #nct fanfiction #nct fanfic #nct fluff #nct au #jaehyun au #nct smut #nct 127 smut #jaehyun smut #nct 127 scenarios

[dyde21]

Grown up

This is based off a prompt from @cakesnomnom of an older Percy and Annabeth living a cute domestic life! I hope you all enjoy it! Warning, bit raunchy humor for my usual work but nothing bad. =P

XxXxXxXxX

“Sally… are you sure? Really, I don’t mind. It’s not a problem…” Annabeth said, running a hand through her hair.

“Annabeth, dear, you look like you’re about to pass out. It’s fine, I’ve done this twice before, I have a bit of practice with it.”

The corner of Annabeth’s mouth quirked up slightly. Leave it to Sally to say things how they are. “We’ve just been busy finishing things with the venue and catering…”

Sally just shook her head across the iris message. “I know some wonderful florists that I can get a deal with. It’s not a large wedding either so it’ll be fine. Just rest up and enjoy it, okay? That’s what I’m here for.”

Annabeth smiled, nodding in defeat. Sally could be as stubborn as her son. 

“Thank you.” She finally said.

Sally just beamed at her. “My pleasure. Now I have to go but tell Percy I say hi, okay? Love you, dear.”

Annabeth nodded. “Love you too, Sally.” She said, waving once before waving her hand through the mist to dismiss it. 

Leaning back in her kitchen chair, Annabeth just let her head fall back for a moment and took a deep breath. She could practically feel the weight fall off her shoulders. One less thing to worry about felt like a gift from the gods. But like, an actual welcome one for once.

Leaning forward she drew a thick line through “flowers” on her latest iteration of her “To-Do” list.

That only left… a lot. 

Standing up, she pushed her chair back and walked over to the window of their small apartment in downtown New York. Scooping up her cooling coffee from the table, she took a sip and just stood in peace for a moment. Some part of her wondered when Percy would be back with the groceries. Things had been a bit hectic since he had proposed to her and she teary-eyed accepted on the beach. Ever since they had graduated, things had thankfully settled down for a bit. It was clear they could never live a truly normal life, but this little apartment had been their own sort of elysium. 

She was happy to discover though that time had done little to dull the burning love she felt her boyfr- fiance. It still felt a little weird calling the dork she had known for so long that. But she couldn’t be happier. Just thinking those words made her chest warm and a jolt of energy coursed from her head to her toes. 

She sighed, taking another sip of her coffee, wishing Percy would hurry up. She should have just ordered out for dinner so they could have stayed home all day together. She toyed with the idea of driving off to vegas, grabbing Sally on the way and having a small impromptu wedding just so they could get it over with and get to their honeymoon where they would have two weeks of nothing but each other’s company to enjoy.

With a sigh, she set down her coffee on the table again and figure she should do a little more work while Percy was out rather than just daydreaming like she did when she was a teenager. She was on her way to thirty now.

The sound of keys opening their door jolted Annabeth to attention, and before she really made the choice to she was standing in front of the door, watching it open and seeing Percy waddle his way through the door with both arms full of groceries threatening to spill over. 

“Hey babe. I’m ho-” He was cut off as she stared at her, a bit caught off guard to see her standing there waiting for him. That only lasted a moment before a grin crept on his face. “Missed me?”

Annabeth just flushed red, realizing how childish it looked. “I thought you might need help with groceries.” She muttered, looking off to the side and ignoring how much her ears burned. 

Stepping forward she grabbed two bags from him. “Well… maybe a little.” She confessed, kissing him on the cheek before walking back and setting the bags down on the counter. 

It had taken quite a while, but Annabeth had forced herself to pick up the habit of being a little more honest with herself and Percy. It was one thing to know your fatal flaw, and it was another to work on it. 

“I should hope so, soon-to-be Mrs. Jackson.” He said, causing another jolt of energy through her system. She was really starting to like the sound of that.

“Well, I missed you too. Especially when picking out laundry detergent. I don’t get why there are a million different brightly colored bottles with vague names on them. I really feel like they’re just confusing us intentionally with all the choices…” He continued to rant with a smile about shopping and Annabeth just stood next to him, unpacking the bags as she bumped her hips into his.

They finished the bags, closing all the cabinets and Percy just turned to her. “You really should come next time, it’s more fun shopping with you anyway. You never forg-” He was cut off as Annabeth had closed the distance and cupped his face with both hands before kissing him.

Percy was surprised, but only for a moment before he wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her closer. They kissed in their peaceful kitchen for a few more moments, before Annabeth pulled away and took a deep breath. 

“...I should go shopping more often.” He teased, causing Annabeth to laugh. “Maybe. But for now you should shower. You stink like sweat.”

Percy shrugged. “Not my fault it’s so hot out.” He said, kissing her forehead once before walking towards their room, throwing his shirt over his shoulder as he walked. 

Annabeth leaned around the corner to watch him walk away, her eyes glued to the muscles on his back as he undid his belt. Biting her lip, she considered joining him in the shower too, but shook her head and focused on making some food for lunch. She knew  him well enough by now that when he got out of the shower the first he’d do would be to start pawing through the cabinets and start devouring whatever he could get open first. Settling for a simple sandwich and chips, she made his just the way he liked it, humming to herself. Compared to the stress she felt this morning while working on plans, right now she just felt at peace. This was on the one place she found she truly could find peace.

“You know me so well.” Percy’s voice sounded from behind her, as she felt his arms wrap around his waist and pull her closer, resting his chin on her shoulder as he looked down at the food. 

Annabeth snickered, leaning her head back slightly to rest against his. “Not the most complicated puzzle out there.” She teased. Some stray drops of water dripped from his hair and she pouted. “You’re still soaked! Move, you’re gonna get me wet.”

Percy leaned back, raising an eyebrow with a troublemaker smile at her. It dawned on her a moment later but Percy just innocently took a bite of his sandwich and grabbed his plate and started walking towards the couch. “Love you.” 

“Love you too.” She mumbled, annoyed that the smile on her face was truly stopping her from getting upset at the brat she would be marrying soon.

He had flipped on the game and was eating his sandwich happily like he had no cares in the world. 

Right when she sat down, without even thinking he just lifted the plate so she could rest his legs over his lap, a habit she had picked up some time as she leaned against the side of the couch.

“Oh, your mom says hi, by the way. She said she’s going to take care of the florist for us.”

Percy looked over, a mix of emotions on his face. “That’s great but I feel bad…”

Annabeth just shrugged. “I do kinda too, but I really do think she wants to do it. Probably her way of helping out, plus she probably would do a better job than either of us.” 

Percy nodded. “That’s true…”

“Besides I’m pretty sure she was happier that we’re getting married than even we are.” She teased with a laugh, and Percy laughed in turn. 

“She had been nagging me for months, and for the whole month afterwards she practically started every conversation with “I can’t believe you did it finally.” 

Annabeth just laughed, dropping a chip on the floor accidentally. “True, you did take a while…” She teased.

Percy shot her a mild glare. “I was waiting for the right moment. You know how much I love you… I just… didn’t want to screw it up.”

Annabeth was touched by his sincerity, pausing for a moment. “You’re cute when you’re honestly.”

Percy just rolled his eyes. “Fine, I won’t do it again.”

Annabeth just smiled, moving her plate to the side as she sat up properly, kissing his cheek. “I mean it, it was really sweet that you cared so much. But I am happy that you’ll be my husband soon finally.” She said, looking down and twisting the ring on her finger happily. 

Percy blushed red, looking away and nodding. “Me too.”

Annabeth just shifted to rest her head on her shoulder, curling her legs up under her. 

Annabeth wasn’t sure how long they laid on that couch together, the fan gently blowing on them as they pretended all their responsibilities didn’t exist. It wasn’t like she had planned to avoid being productive for the rest of the day, but she felt into a comfortable groove with Percy and didn’t exactly want to break it. Everyone else could wait a day.

When Annabeth woke up draped across Percy’s chest, she just smiled, burying.her face into his shirt a little more, enjoying the familiar scent.

Their legs were tangled up, and she wasn’t sure when they had switched from idle chit chat to napping together, but she sure as Hades didn’t mind. 

“Perce…” She mumbled half asleep. It took a few more attempts before he finally woke up enough to look at her bleary eyed. “Hm..?” 

“We fell asleep. Again.” She muttered.

“So…?” He said through a yawn.

“We missed dinner, and if we keep sleeping we’ll be up super early tomorrow.” She explained, though her voice betrayed how much she’d love to stay here with him.

“So?” He repeated, a sleepy smirk on his face.

Annabeth just headbutted his chest gently. “Shush, we need to get up, and I’m getting hungry. Pizza?”

That seemed to do the trick as Percy was suddenly a little more awake. “Fine, but only because I’m hungry. I expect you to be right back in my arms when we get back.”

Annabeth was too tired to hide her blush. “There’s no place I’d rather be. Now let’s get going.”

She said, crawling up him slightly to share a brief kiss with him before she forced herself to her feet. Looking down at her still dishelved fiance as he looked up at her like she was an angel, Annabeth realized things were good. That “To-Do” list felt a little shorter, and she just knew things would work out in the end.

Offering a hand up, she helped her lazy fiance sit up. “Go fix your hair and get changed so we can go out. And wipe your chin, you drool when you sleep.”

#percabeth #percy jackson #annabeth chase #pjo #HoO #Thank you for the request #I live for domestic fluff #so much

[whatarubberchicken]

Just for Cakes

Happy Birthday, @bowser14456! Sorry I’m late in the day! Hope you have a good one!

 Just for Cakes

Marinette skipped down to the bakery in high spirits. She’d finally gotten all her work done and was finally ready to have some quality time with one of her best friends. After all, Hawkmoth was still pouting over the fact that yet another villain had simply handed over their akumatized item after a short battle with Paris’s heroes, and had barely even tried to get their Miraculouses. She was trying not to be smug about it, but secretly, she was thrilled. The people of Paris seemed to be fully behind her and Chat Noir, which meant a lot less work.

And hopefully, a quiet patrol tonight, complete with snacks.

“Papa,” she sang lightly, “do we have any macarons left over from to—WOW, WHAT IS THAT??” She squealed, staring at the bright red cake in amazement. It wasn’t huge, like some of her father’s creations were, but it WAS practically covered in strawberries and chocolate (two of her favorites) and there was something written on the top….

Tom Dupain quickly put his body between her and the mouth-watering confection, blocking her view.

“Nope! Sorry, honey! No viewing the secret order!”

“Secret order?!” Marinette repeated gleefully. “Is that for ME??”

Oh, who could’ve ordered her a secret cake? Could it be Adrien? Maybe he was planning to take her out for a romantic night and asking her to be his girlfriend!! THAT WOULD BE A DREAM COME TRUE!!!

“No, sweetie, it’s not for you,” Tom said gently.

Marinette pouted as her romantic daydream crumbled before her eyes. “Then why can’t I see it?” she whined, trying to look around her father.

“Because,” her father said, moving with her to continue to block her line-of-sight, “one of the—reasons he—trusted us—with this—was that we—” he finally put his hand on her hand to push her away and hold her there, “—promised that no one would know where it came from. Or who bought it.”

“Why would anyone need that much secrecy around a cake?” she asked, frustrated.

“He’s… kind of a celebrity,” Tom said vaguely, rubbing the back of his neck. “Now, I’ve told you too much already—go play somewhere else!”

“But, technically, I work here too!” she pointed out. “You could just say, as an employee, I needed to know!”

“Nope. He specifically told me not to tell you, since he knows your best friend is a blogger who loves to get scoops on celebrities.” She opened her mouth to defend her friend, but her father stared her down. “And ‘as an employee,’ I expect you to listen to your boss.” Tom said, crossing his arms.

Marinette scowled, knowing that he could be very stubborn at times like this. Then she smirked.

“Ok, fine. I’ll listen to the boss,” she said sweetly, then called upstairs, “MAMAN?? CAN I LOOK AT THE PRETTY STRAWBERRY CAKE, PLEASE?!”

“NO, DEAR! LISTEN TO YOUR FATHER!!” Sabine called back.

“Darn it. I thought that would work,” Marinette grumbled. Her father smirked at her knowingly and made a little ‘shooing’ motion with his hands.

“Fine, but I’m taking some extra croissants,” she said, grabbing a bunch of treats for her and Chat Noir.

“Try not to make yourself sick!” he called after her, carefully guarding his precious cake until she was back upstairs.

Marinette tried not to grumble all the way upstairs. Really, just the fact that she couldn’t know was what was burning her up inside. Now that she knew she couldn’t know, she wanted to know. Needed to know. Who had commissioned a special cake and was enough of a celebrity to want to keep it all hush hush? Why would they need to keep it hush hush??

It was a little too small to be a wedding cake, maybe an engagement?

Was it some millionaire, celebrating his mistresses’ birthday?? (Some rumors were going around that Gabriel Agreste had a secret girlfriend…)

Was some actor going to propose to his long-time girlfriend?? (Or maybe Jagged Stone was going to propose to Penny! Or Clara Nightingale??)

Or was it a mafia boss, celebrating the defeat of an enemy?? (Wow, her mind went dark sometimes….)

“C’mon, Tikki. I need to get out of here before my brain explodes from ‘what if’ questions,” Marinette said. “Spots on!” Tikki looked confused at her statement but giggled as she flew into the earrings.

Ladybug grabbed her blanket and the bag of goodies and was out in the night air before her musings could catch up to her. Ahh, flying over Paris was its own form of therapy.

She landed at their favorite rooftop and spread out the blanket. They’d originally met at the Eiffel Tower each night, but the tourists saw them, figured out it was a routine, and had continually pestered them for pictures. It had become too much of a hassle, and they’d agreed on this other, non-descript building with a great view of the Tower, especially when it was lit up against the night sky. So far, nobody had found them. Or they were keeping their distance. Either way, she was grateful she and Chat could have this time together to get to know each other and work on their teamwork without worrying about timers or akumas with agendas.

And if they happened to race each other around Paris with an extra macaron as the prize for the winner, well, it was still considered patrol, right? She hummed to herself as she set out the snacks she’d gathered, trying to keep her mind off… other things….

OH, WHO WAS SHE KIDDING???

Okay, Ladybug. Whose cake was it??

Hawkmoth? Prematurely celebrating their defeat? –Ha. She’d shove his face in it!

XY? Trying to shmooze some unsuspecting musician to do his work for him? –No, no way. He wouldn’t be that thoughtful.

Mayor Bourgeois? Maybe as a gift for Chloé? –Actually, that one kind of made sense. And he didn’t want anyone to know about it, especially Marinette, because he knew how much Chloé hated her and that his precious princess would probably refuse any cake that came from Marinette’s parents’ bakery.

Ladybug nodded. Case closed. The cake was yet another attempt for the mayor to buy his daughter’s affection. That had to be it. And it wasn’t even Chloé’s birthday or anything!

She hoped the brat choked on it. –NO! NO, SHE DIDN’T!! UGH, LADYBUG! WHAT A THOUGHT!! And besides, that’d be a total waste of perfectly-delicious-looking strawberries and chocolate that she knew would melt on the tip of her tongue….

Ok, she needed to stop drooling. Where was that cat??

She was just a little jealous, she finally admitted to herself, stretching out on the blanket. She knew (even with her cute little daydream about Adrien blushing and asking her to go out with him and hand-feeding each other strawberries under the Paris sky) that the cake wasn’t for her. It was nowhere near her birthday, no holidays were coming up, and she didn’t really have anyone who would buy her a cake on impulse (even in her dizziest daydreams, Adrien was far too timid to actually ask her out with a cake! Unless, of course, he made it himself… and now she was imagining him in an apron—SO CUTE!!)

She was still giggling to herself when she heard the tell-tale pitter-patter of Chat Noir’s boots.

“About time,” she grinned as soon as he leapt into view.  

“Sorry, my lady,” Chat laughed. “I had to pick up an order.”

Ladybug frowned at the non-descript brown box in his hands. “Cha~at, you were supposed to get the drinks!”

“I got ‘em! I got ‘em!” he said quickly, producing two bottles of soda from the belt around his waist. Ladybug grabbed them before he could drop the box he was trying to balance on one hand.

“So, what’s in the box?” she asked, curiosity getting the best of her as he carefully set it down on the blanket. She narrowed her eyes when he flushed.

He’d better not be trying anything romantic again.

“I—umm, had a thought…,” he said, looking nervous. “I know we don’t know each others’ birthdays or anything… and I know we can’t! But you’re a really important person in my life, and it just kinda felt wrong to never have a celebration, soo….”

And just like that, Ladybug’s scowl was wiped away, even before he opened the box.

Oh, my sweet kitty….

She gasped when she saw it. It was her cake! Well, not hers hers—but apparently hers hers—because Chat had just lit a candle on the top of it—and he was smiling so timidly—and the top spelled out “HAPPY BIRTHDAY LADYBUG” in beautiful white and crème-colored frosting—and why hadn’t she noticed before that the strawberries and little chocolate pieces were perfectly positioned to look like ladybug spots all over—

“Chat!” she whispered, choked up.

“Make a wish, my lady,” he said, his grin widening when he saw how much she liked his gift.

She quickly wiped away some happy tears. “Aren’t you supposed to sing first?” she teased.

“Oh, shoot! That’s right! That’s now, isn’t it… umm, okay. I’m sorry in advance….” He cleared his throat and began singing the most off-key rendition of “Happy Birthday” she’d ever heard. When it finally ended, he looked away, flushing deep. “And that’s why my dad made me take piano for my music lessons, not voice,” he admitted. “It wasn’t too bad, was it?”

Just then, they heard voices from down below.

“Oh my God, what was that?”

“Sounded like an alley cat.”

Chat Noir flushed even deeper red. Ladybug, however, gave him a grin and a quick kiss on the cheek.

“It was perfect, Chat. Thank you,” she said, quickly blowing out the candle so no more wax could drip onto her precious cake. “You really know how to make a girl feel special.” Chat just gave her a dazed, dopey smile in return, rubbing the cheek where she’d kissed him.

“But just so you know,” she continued, selecting a strawberry for herself and taking a big bite. “It’s nowhere near my birthday, you goof.”

He gave her a good-natured pout. “And how was I supposed to know that?”

“You could’ve just used the day we met.”

“Nope. That one’s our anniversary,” Chat said, shaking his head. “No way was I going to combine dates if I could help it. And just think, you get more presents this way!”

That got her attention. “I get presents?”

He took a small box out of his pocket and shook it at her tauntingly. “Only after we finish the cake.”

Ladybug pouted. “And I suppose you’re gonna want me to plan out a fake birthday party for you too?”

“We~ell, you don’t have to, but if you want to….” He trailed off, looking hopeful. She laughed again, already planning. No way she could resist those puppy dog eyes. And she already knew of several presents he would love.

“So, are you gonna help me eat this thing or what?”

Chat Noir quickly sprang into action, producing a knife and some napkins (no plates, but he looked so discouraged until she told him it was fine).

“I’ve always wanted to try this type of cake,” he babbled as he cut it. “My mom had it once in America and said it was really good, but—OMG, YOUR CAKE IS BLEEDING.”

Ladybug looked. Sure enough, the inside of the cake was a deep red in color. Against the brightness of the frosting on top, it really did look like he’d cut into some animal. She covered her mouth to hide her laughter, having had a similar reaction when she was younger.

“Is that red velvet cake?” she asked.

He gaped at her. “Yes! I mean, they said it was red, but I didn’t expect it to be red-red! I thought it would be—oh wow, I feel like I killed something.” He put the knife down, looking overwhelmed at the sight of her cake.

She laughed as she took the knife from him and cut herself a small piece. “Don’t worry, kitty, it’s good. Here, try a piece,” she said, holding it out for him to take a bite.

He looked at the cake in her hand dubiously. “My lady, you know I trust you, and you hand-feeding me is one of my fantasies come true, but that… shouldn’t we say a prayer over it or something?”

“Eat,” she insisted, barely able to breathe through all the laughter she was holding back. He still looked hesitant, but he finally took a bite. Instantly, all his doubts melted away.

“Ooo, that is good,” he said, looking down at the mutilated cake. “Thank you for your sacrifice, oh delicious one.”

“Mmm, and cream cheese frosting,” Ladybug said, currently in heaven as she finished off her piece. “You’re setting the bar pretty high for these fake birthdays, Chat Noir.”

“I’m sure you’ll rise to the challenge, my lady,” Chat grinned back, finally relaxing.

“Challenge accepted.”

They sat there for a few minutes, enjoying themselves, when Chat finally broke the silence.

“So what did you wish for, my lady?” he asked.

“Can’t tell you,” she said with a wink. “But maybe you’ll find out next year.”

Or maybe sooner, she thought, watching him gaze out over their city. Maybe.

--End

#@bowser14456 #happy birthday! #just for cakes #ladynoir #hope you like it #chat kills a cake #ladybug #chat noir #red velvet cake is scary #to be fair my first one was actually shaped like an animal so it scarred me #no telling on the birthday wishes!

[hitchell-mope]

Just put on the movie

And there we go. The dedication is there.

Oh god the rapping.

My palms will be bloody by the time this is over.

But I like the parallels to the first movie

To much auto tune

There goes my heart Disney.

Oh lord that’s high

Bbys. Smee twins

WHY WASNT DIZZY THERE FROM FILM TWO

There’s my child Celia

MY BOY!!!!

I mean Mal has a point.

He thinks it through

I love him so fucking much

Loving Doug’s hair

Rat bastard. Rat bitch. Rat fairy (Adam belle Verna)

Fuck off leah chad Audrey

😍😍😍😍. This version is better then d1

SUCK IT PASTEL COW

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

Oh Evie love. Just tell him you love him

FUCK OFF YOU GERIATRIC BITCH

YES WE WOULD PREFER MAL TO YOU YA BITCH

I hate you Adam and belle

Ben and the other three are adorable family

Still hating Audrey. So. Fucking. Much

Love the purple limo

WHY IS TREMAINE NICE. IT MAKES NO SENSE

Bal parent vibes are strong

They shoulda painted the limo roof purple

Dying of cuteness

Proud fiancé Mal. Love it

Fuck off leah

Here’s papa hades. And the ham.

DRAGON MAL. WHOO HOO

Ah well. Nice while it lasted

NOT HER JOB PASTEL COW

So. Much. Ham.

Poor girl. Ouch.

🤮🤮🤮🤮. I still hate her and her geriatric bitch of a grandmother

Oh bitch please. First words out of your mouth were creel. And it ain’t abated

I’m supposed to be sorry for this sad act? I don’t think so

So. Much. Rapping

Oh. SPARE ME WOMAN

Still theft. Throw her on the isle with her grandmother

Lonely and friendless. Because Mal is so much better then you ya limp noodle

Gotta be bad on the back

YOU DESERVE A SLAP AROUND THE FACE YOU SPOILED BRAT

Seriously though. The actual singing is better then the rapping. So gotta give satah her dues

Fuck off grown ups.

YOU PUT THEN THERE IN THE FIRST FUCKING PLACD

Blue bitch. Just like always belle

Ok. People. You can see it’s hurting bal to do this. KILL THE BEAST

DONT CRY BABY BOY. PLEASE. LAST TIME ALMOST KILLED ME

Murder. The fucking. Parents

Evie. Evie’s sensible. Listen to your sister Mal.

And here comes the guilt. Like always. The narrative blames Mal

That darn cake

Ah. Pain. Hug them now

And jump scare

Oh god. Shut up Audrey. You’re a sore loser

Eh. The prosthesis look ok

Audrey. Nutter. Ben was more then ready to start the honeymoon when Mal was a dragon. Do you really think a hag would stop him?

😂😂😂😂

Oh boy

That’s a lie and you know it bluey.

At least the bikes have an explanation

Why the red for Evie though

And the mutt speaks

Fuck off Chad. I hate you so much

This bitch again

So shrieky.

Kiss ass

Real original

Jump Jane jump!

So many neck cricks

No one tells him anything

Cella’s right Mal

Overly long gag. But cute

Awww 🥰🥰🥰🥰. At least he’s a good dad

Nice reference

And the fear mongering begins.

And here’s the cryptid. He shoulda died in it’s going down

Psycho bitch pirate whore

Cella’s a troll and I love it

The vehicle needs an oil change

At least he’s sleeping. Though that position can not be comfortable

At long last the reveal.

He’s funny. And hot. (I can see where @mochacake2016 is coming from)

We know! We know

And here’s the music

😂😂😂😂.

He’s got a point

Ok.

THERES NO PHONES ON THE ISLAND QUEEN MAL

She actually sounds like jade west here

So far. Besides the proposal. This is my favourite song. Mostly for Hades great looks. Great voice

And the tambourine

Would be better with purple and blue fire effects. But no. We can’t have nice things. They spent the budget on pirate whores make up

She’s got a point. They both do

LISTEN TO HIM

Proud papa

C’mon girl. Cry

Of course she told her sister

He’s a good king.

T-shirt should be ripped.

🤮🤮🤮🤮. Hate her so much

And. Here. We. Go.

Benny. I love you. But did you not hear what she said to Evie when you first met the vks. Of course not. You were lost in Mal’s eyes.

Oh god. PLEASE SOMEBODY GO AND MELT HER

Whore man is probably skunk drunk. Gil’s cute as ever though

Throw hook in the water. And keep it there.

🎶she’s back🎶

And there screwed

He makes feel physically sick

Uma. I love ya. But honestly. Mal owes no one anything. It’s not her job.

No it ain’t

Jay’s got a point

Oh honey

Hook. In the words of the irreverent Captain Jack Sparrow “if the bikes be crashed properly. You be crashed along with it”. Not you Gil. I like you

Mother hen strikes again. Uma ain’t buying what she’s selling

Pure child Celia. (I don’t use this very much but) Gil’s babey (it feels wrong to type£

Chicken arms. No brains. No wit. No dance skills. No rapping skills. Ya basically a walking corpse hook

The dogs giving me a nervous twitch.

I hate the pair of them so no. No sympathy for prince douche bag

Gil makes me cry so simply

Stab the pirate jay. Please. For all of us

Psycho bitch

I want. It. Dead. Brutally. Dead

And more music. If this weren’t Disney they coulda melted them yo pukes of goo and pour it down Harry’s throat.

Oh god

So she can’t count either. Just like her brother

Definitely cha cha slide.

Deep sigh

So much ham.

Here’s a funny idea. How about instead of a bloody pantomime. ACTUALLY FUCKING FIGHT YOU FECKERS

Synchronised armour dancing. That’s new

Oh for fuck sake

Ha ha. Save it for the sob story bitch

What’s next a kick line

Thank god I was wrong.

Hook should be suffocated under the armour right now. Put us out of our misery

Care bear alert

I had to have a flu jab today. And it weren’t as painful as every single nanosecond hooks on screen

Love the platonic affection (I hate the very concept of malvie. What did you expect?)

Mother alert

Don’t eat wild fruit honey

So cute. But so dumb

Oh. Phineas and Ferb reference

Awww babies.

Don’t you dare tell me Mal doesn’t care.

THEY FOUND DOUG

Uma’s so done with care bear bs

More singing. Yay(!)

Please. Remind me again exactly why this is a DCOM. Cause it honestly does not feel like it what with the backstory pirate whores entire existence and the choreography

How has evie not broken a leg in this number.

Believe me Mal and Uma. I feel your frustration they go together like peanut butter and chocolate spread. (Perfectly if you didn’t know)

Where is she going?

She knows how R&J ended right? Double suicide. Why the romanticism huh?

HE IS NOT A RAG DOLL! Though props to Zachary for not corpsing

How can you hate Doug. He’s adorable. Best straight couple ever

There’s ma boy. Rip Harry’s throyatvout plwae.

Ben’s always been hot. But this is definitely working for me.

Awww. Carlos helping his papa

Wet Ben. Yum

Awww. Janelos cuteness.

Love the beard. So good. 🤤🤤🤤🤤

Someone murder the man whore before I do.

He makes me wanna throw up. And I’m not physically capable of doing that

@rpsocsandcanonohmy. I get where you’re coming from. But I also get where Ben is coming from. Sunbeam did get him abducted. And man slut tried to feed him to sharks. So I do understand both points. Doesn’t mean you’re wrong though

JUST. EXPLAIN. HIS MIND IS BEAST ADDLED

Shoulda let Ben slash hooks throat jay. You’re slipping buddy

Mal’s eating crow

Hopefully he chad suffocates. Then she’s have done one thing that wasn’t completely worthlessly reprehensible

🎶feelings🎶

And it had to ruin it

Te-am work. As plankton says

Proud sister

Boys are back. (With dude and the mutt in tow)

YAAAAAAAAAY

I hate happy harry. But I do like happy Uma. Eh. Double edged sword

BAL THIRST. FINALLY

Shoulda gone with Janelos. Jarlos is from big time rush

Oh they’re so cute

Poor Doug.

DOUG AND GIL FRIENDSHIP.

So. Update. Might be like Mal. (Definitely loving Ben’s facial hair)

Yawning over chad. So pathetic

Her seat from him douchey mcuseless

Poor Janey

Cats outta the bag

Once again. I kinda understand all points. Yeah Mal shouldn’t have lied. But Uma didn’t really give her and choice. And Evie just kinda assumed. And no one really lets her explain anything.

Hooks still pathetic. Even hurt emotionally I still wanna punch his roger rabbit looking face (Sorry Roger)

Oh dear

Mal. Don’t apologise. You did what you felt you needed to do. And no gives you a chance to explain. Ever.

Yes. You needed to do what you could.

Excellent acting all around as usual

Evie. Look. I love you. Your favourite number seven. But WHY IS IT YOUR SISTERS JOB. WHY DOES EVERYONE MAKE IT MALS PROBLEM

Ha! Evie said it. She said family.

Oh fuck. Taken for granite

More singing.

Monster/story/invincible

I do want to stab Harry in the mouth with the hook

More flashback. Yay(.). Couldn’t they fill out the runtime

Flashbacks. TO THE START OF THE SO G THE FLASHBACK IS FROM. OH FOR FUCK SAKES

More dragon.

Audrey’s performance might make me a vegetarian

How is it not crushed by the claws?

Fire should be green

Yay. Auds dead. Please say yes?

The twins say literally one thing

From magical incantation to vaguely irritating verbal tick. Well alright then

Evie. Why do you sound so sad. It’s a good thing Audrey’s dying. The ultimate price and all that. You should be glad. It’s a good thing

Mal: he’s my father. Ben: shocked face. Me: makes a sound like a boiling kettle

Bye bye facial hair

Die slut

More eating crow

The in laws meet

Exactly hades. Exactly. Knee beast in the dick

God Ben’s so hot.

Bite Adam’s throat out please hades

Should’ve let Audrey waste away. And sent granny to Tartarus to meet her

OH SPARE ME YOUR BLEEDING HEART ROUTINE! I still hate you in a fundamental level

OH FINALLY YOU GERIATRIC BITCH

Nice little family moment

What the fuck is Evie’s dress?

Queen Mal has a very nice ring to it.

Sure you can. You owe them noting. You owe nobody anything

Jay has a pull back braid in his hair. Yay!

“Audrey would be gone”. You say it as though that’s a bad thing

“Insert woody woodpecker laugh”. Fuck you Adam

Compromise. Bring the vks over. And plop Adam Audrey chad anleah on the isle. Sink it into the ocean

Why didn’t Verna bring the barrier down. Oh yeah. Cause then she’d be useful

More singing

At least this takes place in daylight

I still hate harry

Push Harry in the drink please. IM LITERALLY BEGGING YOU

God I love Ben and Doug

Why the Charleston?

I still hate tremaine

Well. Jane. In ZM. You met Mal. She’s Carlos’s mother in this au

Giljay. It’s cute

So Harry makes me ill right upbto the end. Now he’s related to purple and blue

🎶a bitch is in the dog house🎶. And deservedly so

🤮🤮🤮🤮

Sweet little king

Oh boy

Whore has a turkey neck

This is the end. Good movie. With some unneeded bits. I’m gonna change a lot in ZM part three. And both dedications broke me.

#disney descendants #descendants 3 #anti harry x chad #anti harry x doug #anti harry x jane #harry x jay #anti harlos #anti malvie #anti haudrey #anti benrry #anti harry hook #anti audrey daughter of sleeping beauty #anti chad charming

[theotherboywhonevergrewup]

My Top Songs of 2019

It’s that time of the year again when I take a look back at all the great music that was released throughout the year and choose my top 10.  Quick disclaimer as usual: These are not what I think are the best songs of the year.  They’re not even my favorite songs of the year.  They’re simply the top 10 songs that have defined my year.  (See the end if you’re interested in the rules of the selection of this top 10; also, most of this was written in 2019 but some was written in 2020).

10. “Think About Us” - Little Mix featuring Ty Dolla $ign

“When you're dancin' in the club And the nights are getting hard Do you think about us?”

Everyone knows that I have a weakness for girl groups.  UK’s Little Mix isn’t exactly my favorite, but admire how strongly they’ve stuck together as a group.  Their chemistry is undeniable, both as people and as vocalists.  To me, “Think About Us” was the standout track from last year’s LM5, and the addition of Ty Dolla $ign was the little shove it needed to be great.  The girls shine with their vocal prowess both on their solos and together on the chorus, and Ty$’s verse splits the track nicely.  The accompanying video is mesmerizing.  Each of the girls look absolutely stunning, and they have individual sets representing the different parts of a relationship, with Perrie as the butterflies-in-my-stomach beginning and Jade as the icy, cold end.  The lyrics are quite vague, but I think that’s the intention.  It’s applicable to any stage of a relationship; it could be a love song or a break-up song.  With it’s fun beat, it’s hard to pick if you want to dance to it, belt it out, or try to do both, but it’s definitely been an infectious part of 2019!

9. “Lonely for You” - Armin van Buuren featuring Bonnie McKee

“No, you're never gonna see me cry I already got a brand new life Don't you know I'm moving on And everyday I'm stronger? I don't even know you're gone”

The Netherlands’ Armin van Buuren has a recipe to get trance music to pull at your heart, and one piece that makes this apparent is “Lonely for You.”  With the assist from US’s pop hit writer Bonnie McKee, this track is different yet familiar, a haunting disconnect to match the mixed feelings of the lyrics.  From light synths to disco-esque drums to pure piano, Van Buuren’s track pushes and pulls the same way the tumultuous narrator’s lyrics go back and forth, with McKee’s vocals surfing on the top.  The music video has a couple choreography emphasizing the push-and-pull theme, and McKee looks fantastic as usual.  Van Buuren’s Balance is full of more emotionally-rich tracks for both happy and sad times, many of which utilize beautiful piano to highlight amazing vocals.  “Lonely for You” is an altogether addictive track that was perfect for all the lonely nights of 2019.

8. “Antidote” - Mr Hudson

“You of all people After all we've been through Started out an angel And now you get away with murder”

As a huge fan of the UK’s Mr Hudson, I waited basically a decade for his sophomore album, and it did not disappoint.  While When the Machine Stops features several tearjerking songs, “Antidote” is on the next level.  The song takes the subject of betrayal and perfectly captures how trust can die.  The genius is in its simplicity.  Not a single instrument starts until the entire first verse is complete, letting the lyrics speak for themselves.  Even when the instruments do come in, it’s just soft percussion and synths.  As much as I love vocal runs and ad-libs galore, the straightforward melody had me humming this song for much of 2019.

7. “Me & You” - EXID

“Oh 야야야 더 이상 우리라는 말 하지 마마마 안 봐도 뻔하잖아 야임 마마마 지금 날 어디서 속이려 들어 그건 네 엄마마마 한테나 가서해 baby I don't care”

As I mentioned in last year’s post, 2018 was the year I fell in love with K-Pop, mostly due to Blackpink at the time.  As much as I love Blackpink (and got to see them live this year!), their limited discography didn’t leave much to be loved.  Enter EXID.  This group is stacked: arguably South Korea’s best female rapper in the game LE, one of the best vocalists Solji, and the girl who is absolutely beautiful, sexy, cute, and smart all at the same time Hani (who may or may not be my ultimate bias, sorry Rosé).  Their previous single “I Love You” missed my 2018 list because it was released so late in the year, but it turned out to be my most played song on Spotify this year.  In fact, several of their songs were on that list.  Like many of their previous singles, “Me & You” is an infectious dance track utilizing each member where they excel: Hani with her soft, sultry vocals, a splash of LE’s sick flows to split up the song, Hyelin’s powerhouse vocals to bring up the first chorus, Solji’s even more powerful vocals to take the song to its climax, and Jeonghwa on the dance break (low key kinda sounds like she’s singing “Baby Shark” but that’s a jam too I guess).  The duality of the track is what makes it stand out, with the pretty vocals and simple verses largely contrasting from the deep and dirtier synths of the dance break.  The video plays with this duality by featuring EXID as brides in white versus clubbing in neon.  The rest of the WE mini album isn’t quite as dance-y but is fun to vibe to nonetheless.  The group unfortunately may be over, since Hani and Jeonghwa are leaving their record label, but they’re at least sticking together for their activities in Japan for now.  So many more K-Pop hits were released this year, some of my favorites being Mamamoo’s “Gogobebe,” SEVENTEEN’s “HIT,” Super Junior D&E’s “Danger,” Park Bom’s “Spring,” KARD’s “Dumb Litty,” NCT 127′s “Highway to Heaven”, NCT Dream’s “Boom”, Ong Seongwu’s “Heart Sign,” and another release to be mentioned later on this list.

6. “Heartbreak” - Hunter Hayes

“Another, ‘Almost perfect’ Didn't work, but totally worth it Better to have loved and lost my mind Than lose the nerve to even try”

I remember watching the 2013 Grammy’s and watching Hunter Hayes lose all three of his nominations, at that point becoming the “Leonardo DiCaprio never wins an Oscar” meme to me and my friends.  He went on to lose two more nominations, but honestly, I always liked his music (and Grammy nominations are no small feat in the first place!).  While 2017 was technically the year I had my first date and 2018 was the year I had my first girlfriend, 2019 was the year that I really put myself out there and dated the most.  And yes, there was a lot of awkwardness and stupidity and mostly me messing up, but that’s just a part of life.  And “Heartbreak” perfectly captures all those feelings.  From the guitar to the bit of twang to the drums, this song is unabashedly fun country, and the optimistic lyrics always made me feel better.  It’s like a c’est la vie Rascal Flatts’ “Bless the Broken Road” before he found the girl. The accompanying video is also fun with a groundhog day theme as he tries to win over a girl.  The album as a whole is a fun listen, with “Dear God” being the other Wild Blue (Part I) standout to me.  Here’s hoping Part II comes out with some vibes in 2020!

5. “Tempo” - Lizzo featuring Missy Elliott

“He look like he could gain a little weight Lick the icing off, put the rest in your face”

Lizzo exploded this year, and I’m not mad about it.  She has confidence and charisma galore, and her resulting music is mad bouncy, earning her several Grammy nominations for next year, including Best New Artist.  Her songs like most of Cuz I Love You can be quite loud and in-your-face, which is fine, just not exactly my style.  However, get her on this more subdued R&B beat and throw in a Missy Elliott feature, I’m in.  This will make any upbeat R&B lover dance, and the music video is the kind of hot and fun you would expect (with a cowboy hat you may not expect).  Missy also made an imprint this year with Iconology which is her first group release since 2005′s The Cookbook.  I’ve always been a fan of her work, and this is a perfect feature for her.

4. “NONE of this has been about you” - Spencer Sutherland

“I'm afraid that you would hate me if you knew, That I've become insensitive, It's true, But even if you do”

Spencer Sutherland’s “NONE of this has been about you” off his debut EP of the same name has a lot of elements about it that I would personally want in a song of my own.  It starts off with a very simple piano and vocals with a tinge of soul.  As he continues to sing, he puts more soul and emotion into his voice, and splashes of harmonies start to come in.  A couple short riffs later and just a second before the drop.  Although, it’s not a dance drop.  A choir drops in for the chorus with some drums to announce that, in fact, none of this has been about you.  The song eventually escalates to Sutherland’s soaring ad-libs over the choir.  Beyond the musical stylings, I enjoy the message of this song.  Sure, the narrator is telling someone, possibly his lover, that his struggles are personal and not something she or he should worry about, but I also like to take it as a reminder not to always worry about others or what they are thinking.  For example, 2019 was the first full year I had an ex, and a lot of that time, I was worried about posting on social media because maybe she’ll think this or that is about her.  Honestly, I don’t recall ever “subtweeting” about her.  We’re good.  Any breakup song or black and white photo I post has nothing to do with her.  So this song is a nice reminder to keep it pushing and stay in your own lanes.  The remaining songs on Sutherland’s EP were all also on repeat throughout the year.  The man’s just got a solid voice, and I’m glad he’s continuing a soulful pop sound that is rarer than before.

3. “Beautiful goodbye” - Chen

“다시 시간을 되돌려 처음 만난다면 가로등 옆에 서 있지 말아요 미소 짓지도 왼손으로 머릴 넘기지 마요 그래야 내가 그대를 지나칠 테니까”

Now, when it comes to a piano and vocals, nothing dominated my year more than Chen, especially his debut solo single “Beautiful goodbye.”  I won’t repeat all the reasons why I love his voice so much (see last year’s post), but long story short, he’s my favorite male vocalist right now.  Don’t get me wrong, I love EXO and the energy they bring to their songs, but a full EP of just Chen really lets the listener feel his artistry, pulling on heartstrings every which way.  In this song, the narrator is recognizing that his relationship is dead but proposing that they can hold onto it just for a bit longer until they peacefully part in spring.  There’s a respect to their relationship and what it has done for them that they can take with them as separate people before they part ways.  Chen’s voice takes the listener on an adventure, starting soft and simple then escalating and crescendoing to unveil the hardened pain in his voice.  It’s not a sudden angry breakup, it’s more subtle and more somber.  In the end, his soft vibrato and the final notes of the piano leave the listener in just as an uncertain position as the narrator; is it better to hope it stays winter forever or hope for spring to come?  While I also wanted some upbeat songs from Chen, his April, and a flower EP followed by Dear my dear is chockfull of beautiful and emotional ballads.

2. “Never-ending Summer” - Cyn

“What if we don't ever have to say goodbye? I wanna keep living like we'll never die If you're mad then I'm mad too You're crying, I'm sad too I'll watch your back for you, watch mine”

Newcomer Cyn’s “Never-ending Summer” is, to me, an experience.  It took me a while to appreciate its simplicity, but then it became so addictive that it itself became never-ending.  The guitar or synth (or whatever that instrument is) plays on loop to emphasize the never-ending nature of the song and gives a dreamy vibe that’s somehow both modern and reminiscent of the 70s.  Cyn’s simple vocals evoke a carefree feeling reminiscent of running on the beach and all the accompanying imagery with her photoshoot and lyric video.  It makes sense that Cyn is part of Katy Perry’s record label Unsub Records, as this song feels somewhat like Perry’s hits off of Teenage Dream including “California Gurls” and the title track, albeit much more in Cyn’s own understated style.  This summer, I learned how to surf and have fallen deeper in love with the beach (even though a stingray stung me my last time there), and this song would keep the surfing mentality continuing throughout the year, even when it gets too cold for it to be summer (or, even if my foot is bleeding to death).  Doesn’t hurt that Cyn is unbelievably cute too.

1. “Lovebird” - Far East Movement featuring Lay

“I can sleep here alone, but you know it's better with you You could be by yourself, but you know it's better with two”

As I grow as a person and become more proud of who I am, I think it makes sense for me to become more proud of my Asian heritage as well as support Asians and Asian-Americans out there, especially in the music industry as music means a great deal to me.  That said, it’s important to me that I don’t support people just because they’re Asian as if it’s some kind of nepotism.  That kind of segregating mentality can also be unhealthy.  Far East Movement are technically a one hit wonder; they have yet to outdo their 2010 hit “Like a G6.”  However, this year I found out about their record label Transparent Music that has been around since 2016 with a goal of unifying eastern and western music.  Their previous album aptly named Identity features a ton of artists from both sides of the word, from Hyolyn and Loco to Macy Gray and Soulja Boy (shoutout to my favorite song on that album, “Freal Luv” featuring Tinashe and yet another EXO member, Chanyeol).  To me, music is about unification.  It is about bringing a deeper understanding through melody and rhythm.  Those are the simplest terms I can put it.  I hope this is evident through this list that I appreciate people and music from all kinds of backgrounds.  Even if my tastes lean one way or another from year to year, I hope my lists maintain diversity and well-roundedness.  Somehow, Far East Movement has managed to capture this sense of unification in “Lovebird,” featuring Chen’s EXO bandmate from China, Lay.  It’s not the most complex song; in fact, like many songs on this list, it’s quite simple.  The synth bends in a carefree way that celebrates togetherness along with the lyrics, and I find that beautiful.  2019 was a year of growth and life, and “Lovebird” was the perfect song to accompany it.

*To qualify for this list, the song must have been released this year.  An artist can only have one song on this list, excluding features.

#me

[almaasi]

reaction post typed while watching Good Omens (ALL OF IT)

my favourite novel is now my favourite mini-series and IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL

under the cut: a very long, spoilery six-episode reaction to MY NEW FAVOURITE THING EVER

--

may 31st 07:36pm nz

i posted my episode 1 reaction a couple hours ago but that got ZERO NOTES so i assume people are either avoiding spoilers or aren’t interested, which is fine, but i’m just gonna put all my reactions in one big post so anyone who IS interested doesn’t have to read 6 separate posts c:

edit june 1st 04:08am: btw i watched using a free trial on amazon prime, which i’m pretty sure is worldwide. soooo if yOU WANT TO WATCH THIS, YOU CAN, FOR FREE

--

EPISODE 1: In the Beginning

--

04:03pm

idk how much i’m gonna type, whether i’ll post a reaction to the entire thing in one post....... or how much i’ll end up watching right now

kinda want to spread it out and save it as a treat for after i’ve done some writing

but right now i wanna watch before writing

so maybe i’ll do one ep, write something, then return to this?

edit: aahhaha that didn’t happen

-

04:04pm

I’M SO EXCITED

I’VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG

well... since 2011 when i first read the book

but regardless it’S BEEN 84 YEARS

-

04:05

okay first off i did not know amazon prime did adverts at the start of their videos. so i was like SINCE WHEN WAS CHILDISH GAMBINO/DONALD GLOVER IN GOOD OMENS

and then

yeah

no

either way i thought it was a good opening

-

W A R

NING

cool cool cool cool cool

-

omg i’m used to where the netflix full-screen button is, and on amazon prime that’s the “next episode” button so i gotta be real careful

-

dear god my video quality is TERRIBLE

i.......... i might torrent this show and watch it offline

this is horrendous i can’t see a damn thing

i have never seen pixels this big

-

04:11

okay the quality calmed down after a minute

i loooove the intro, i love that it’s basically word for word from the book

i feel like i’d find it funnier if i hadn’t read the book 3 months ago

-

also? god is a woman? yes

-

04:13

is it just me or does the snek have a slightly david tennant-esque quality about it

-

i’m so happy adam and eve are black

-

04:17

omfg. aziraphale said “ineffable” and now CRAWLEY’S CHECKING HIM OUT TRYING TO SEE IF HE HAS ANY JUNK

WOW

...or y’know, looking for a flaming sword. SAME FUCKING THING.

-

also i looove how FLUFFY azi is

-

azi: “do hope i didn’t do the wrong thing”

i fucking love them both uhrgughhhuhuhughuhhh

-

04:21

small sob for cuteness

umbella wings

-

04:23

in the opening titles, crowley just stopped a spaceship and aziraphale turned it into fish

i feel like that was a douglas adams reference and i’m on board

-

04:25

the entire time i read the book, up until i saw video promos of this show, i thought “crowley” was said the same way as spn’s “crowley”, as in “crahwlee”

not “crOhwlee”

i definitely like that they’re different though

both probably named after aleister crowley tbh. all of whom are queer.

-

THOSE SWAYING HIPS

i haven’t found david tennant attractive in about 9 years but WHOOOP HELLO AGAIN

somehow attractive for entirely different reasons than before. like. my taste changed but tHEN

-

i’m on crowley’s side, taking down a cellphone network is VERY ANNOYING

-

04:35

crowley: shitshitshitshithsit

:D

i can’t wait for aziraphale’s big swear

-

04:37

i miss eating sushi

sushi was great

-

04:43

this baby delivery thing is sTRESSFUL

“aaaaurthurrrrr”

nooo

poor lady

-

04:45

“little toesie woesies”

where’s the sister mary loquacious fan club and where do i sign up

-

i’m glad they colour-coded the babies and did the playing card explanation because this part of the book always tied my brain in knots

-

05:00

this is reminding me how utterly gross england is

-

“MY POINT IS............. DOLPHINS”

YES

-

05:06

see in the book

i never once realised that the nanny was crowley in disguise

-

05:11

digging the snake tattoo sideburns

-

05:14

and yeah the short hair looks good

-

05:15

fINALLY crowley called azi “angel”

-

05:17

crowley: “oh no no don’t do your magic act, pleeease”

the magic act scene is one of my fave parts of the book <3

-

05:20

aw man they cut out the best part

i mean i get why

the kids shouted a bunch of gay slurs at aziraphale

and there were no secret service people with guns

but aw mannn

AND THEY CUT OUT THE BIT WITH THE DEAD DOVE AND CROWLEY BRINGS IT BACK TO LIFE FOR AZIRAPHALE

THAT WAS MY SINGLE FAVOURITE BIT OF THE BOOK

AND IT’S GONE

;C

-

OH WAIT

THERE’S THE DOVE

OH GOOD

-

aw man aziraphhale just brought it back himself

i liked it better in the book

they sat on the steps outside and crowley comforted azi and took the dove and fixed it for him, and then it flew off

idk i just had such a perfect image of that moment in my mind and this was..... good but not the same at all

could be gayer

-

05:27

good dog

-

05:28

crowley: *snifsnif* something’s changed

aziraphale: “oh it’s a new cologne, my barber suggeste--”

crowley: “no no i know what you smell like”

gayyyyyyyyyy <3

-

05:31

okay that’s ep 1 watched!!! i’ll watch more maybe later tonight :D

ENJOYING THIS SO FAR

not as gay as expected ........YET

needs 400% more “angel” and “dear”

--

EPISODE 2: The Book

07:42pm

pillar of salt guy: “something smells evil”

the fact crowley smells evil and yet aziraphale likes his company regardless says a lot

-

07:49

fully expected crowley to say “i didn’t fall, i sauntered vaguely downwards”

-

07:50

iiiii’m finding the narrator a little annoying

maybe it’s because i read the book so i know what’s going on

but saying “he has four items to deliver in his van. he works for this postage company and he’s making his first delivery in a formal warzone”.... idk i feel like all of those things could be shown visually? saying it rather than showing it probably saved seven seconds of airtime, but damn

-

07:56

i wonder if the narrator was a later addition to this, for new audience clarity? the script for god just seems a little stilted, idk

edit: i kind of got used to it, but it was still jarring, which i’m sure was the opposite of the intended effect

-

08:09

the saddest newt

-

08:13

she’s kind of exactly how i imagined her in the book

and definitely my fave next to aziraphale and crowley

-

08:17

i feel so bad for crowley’s plants

poor babies

-

08:19

for some reason i imagined her as a redhead. kind of more like mrs weasley

-

08:33

these wee children......... so soft.......... so smol

-

08:25

v happy with the casting for pepper

tiny downside is that we lose another redhead

-

08:29

i find the kids’ conversations hilarious because they’re the same age as harry potter when he goes to hogwarts the first time

idk if this is what eleven year olds are like in real life, but when i read the book i did feel distinctly like they spoke like eight year olds

-

08:35

crowley: “i like spooky. big spooky fan, me”

he just sounds like the tenth doctor

-

08:36

YEEE FINALLY CROWLeY DOING NICE THINGS FOR AZIRAPHALE

-

08:48

"you know, crowley, i’ve always said that deep down you really are a--”

“SHUT IT”

DON’T YOU CALL HIM NICE YOU PRETTY BASTARD

-

loquacious: “sorry to break up an intimate moment”

-

08:45

i imagined anathema’s tripod thing to be about 5 feet tall, not a cute little knee-high thing

-

08:48

freddie mercury: BIIIII CYCLE

BIIIIIIII CYCLE

yeah i was waiting for that

-

crowley: “get in, angel”

HE MURMURED

DON’T MURMUR YOUR TERMS OF ENDEARMENT noo

-

09:00

end of episode 2!!! i freaking loved aziraphale vs the book <3

-

the credits for this ep credit konnie huq as someone named pam but idk who that is? i had a crush on konnie huq as a kid when she was a presenter on “blue peter”

OH WAIT RIGHT the lady on the breakfast show on crowley’s tv. aw such a small part. hoping we’ll see her again later

edit: nope. might rewatch that part to pay more attention. obviously i didn’t even recognise her after like.. 15 years

--

EPISODE 3: Hard Times

09:05pm

brb gotta get some food

-

09:14

and now i wait for food

EPISODE THREE LET’S GO

is this the one that’s just crowley and azi’s backstory?

-

09:16

i can’t even put my finger on why but he’s getting more attractive

-

09:21

ah yes

aziraphale is eating shellfish and trying to tempt crowley

“oh... that’s your job”

i love this part of their dynamic

-

09:29

i adore when crowley makes aziraphale smile <3

-

09:43

SAUNTERED VAGUELY DOWNWARDS

YEE

-

i like seeing how crowley’s sunglasses differ throughout history

-

09:36

“if they knew i’d been... fraternising”

this is such a forbidden romance i love ittttt

-

09:49

CROWLEY SAVED THE BOOKS

and SOFT VIOLIN PLAYS

THIS IS A FUCKING LOVE STORY

k this is my favourite part of the show so far <3

-

09:50

this angel just fell in love

right in that moment

i see cartoon hearts around him

-

09:54

just had to pause for a second bc there was some broccoli in my tea :c

-

09:56

awwwwwwwwwwwwww 

he got him holy waterrrrrrr

-

UNIVERSAL ANGLE OF HETEROSEXUAL LONGING

-

definitely feeling a lot of “NOW KISS” right about now

-

09:59

LAUGHING BECAUSE THE OPENING CREDITS ARE LITERALLY HALFWAY INTO THE EPISODE

-

10:03

throughout the entire book azi just came across as the kind of person who wore glasses even though glasses were never once mentioned

I AM GLAD TO SEE GLASSES

-

10:12

i like this colour palette and the gold in their makeup

-

10:27

“we can go off together”

omg the world’s ending and crowley’s all RUN AWAY WITH MEEE

-

10:31

okay then

good eyelashes

edit: i also like how their relationship was explained with a simple tap on the wrist: hurry up, you’re on the clock, i’m a sex worker, finish your call because i’m leaving

-

10:32

episode three DONE

these eps don’t feel long enough

maybe that means the pacing is just right? who knows

i feel like i should be doing something other than watching this but..... why

--

EPISODE 4: Saturday Morning Funtime

10:48pm

aziraphale is SOFT and he’s perfect like that <3

fuck u gabriel and your body shaming

-

10:53

i want delivery guy to be okay BUT I READ THE BOOK

so............... i know he will be...... eventually

-

10:55

how did they get photographs taken in the 1600s

-

oh gabriel’s eyes ARE purple, i thought i was seeing them wrong

-

11:02

“maud i love you”

noo ho hoooo

-

11:09

a little douglas adams, definitely

BUT NO PEPPER POT DALEK

AWW

-

11:10

the season is very much jumping between summer and autumn

though i suppose that’s the point, tadfield is just perfect

-

11:12

“which the internet has begun to refer to as the kracken”

i wonder if good omens inadvertently inspired me to write The Wireless a couple of years back. wouldn’t be surprising

edit: no, couldn’t have, because the internet wasn’t much of a thing (or a thing at all?) in the book, given its publish date

-

11:20

that’s a v nice dress/top combo

gosh she’s so pretty

-

11:30

crowley: “we can run away together!!! alpha centauri!!!”

aw baby

-

crowley: “i’m going home, angel! i’m getting my stuff, and i am leaving. and when i am up in the stars, i won’t even think about you!!”

THAT WAS A V SAD BREAKUP NOOOOO

why has there not been a single “dear” yet :c

-

11:37

oh no, this part

i loved this in the book but i am NOT READY for maggots

damn you gaiman

-

11:39

he’s so cute

and so gay

-

11:42

uriel: “don’t think your boyfriend in the dark glasses will get you special treatment in hell”

he looks kinda delighted uriel called crowley his boyfriend

i would say he looks worried but this shot was used without context in the trailer and it came across as genuine joy, i actually thought he was looking at crowley

-

11:46

i thought it was a strange throne before

a spider at the centre of a web

dark halo

yeah

-

11:51

oh now she’s a redhead???

-

also i’m glad they implied newt and anathema just kissed because the sex thing was weird in the book

-

okay never mind

hmm

-

12:05

aziraphale: “oh.................ffffUCK.”

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH

-

12:07

oh no

it’s happening

oh no

i hate this part but i love what happens because of it

-

12:29am

i have eaten and now i have tea and i am back from MORE BOOKSHOP FIRE

-

EPISODE 5: The Doomsday Option

12:31

nuuuuuuuuuu

and “you’re my best friend” playing while crowley’s tryna call azi

nuuuuuu

-

“somebody killed my best friend”

jfhsdfjsdj

/sobs

-

12:36

freddie mercury: “somebody find me somebody tooo ooo looove”

edit: the narration WRECKED this. it was so dramatic and visually emotional but the voiceover completely screwed with it and it was SO UNNECESSARY.

-

12:46

crowley: “i lost my best friend”

he says, while crying, while talking to that friend

-

THE ONE BOOK HE WANTS IS THE ONE CROWLEY SAVED

THEY’RE SO FUCKING BEAUTIFUL TOGETHER

-

azi wanted to share crowley’s body

and then said they had to get a wiggle on

-

12:52

they cut out the hell’s angels / lesser horsemen

i figured they would, but still a shame

-

1:54

in the book tracy’s “spirit guide” was native american but daaaaaamn that part really needed to go

now she’s irish which is... better, probably

-

01:01

ron: “SHUT. UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP”

this guy’s having the time of his life

-

01:03

he wave

-

01:05

1926 bentley; sexiest car right next to the ‘67 chevy impala

-

01:08

omg gotta translate and explain the road

-

01:13

OH NO the maggots are about to happen

they changed the placement of this but it worked for the pacing

-

OH NO

-

k well the maggots were gross but not as bad as i imagined

-

01:31

omg the dog turned upside down rather than be picked up

i wonder if that was intentional

dog: I DO NOT WANT UP

-

01:34

pfff he’s reading “american gods” by neil gaiman

-

01:44am

10/10 flaming car

-

EPISODE 6: The Very Last Day of the Rest of Their Lives

01:51am

here we go...

-

01:55

azi so happy that crowley said the dress suits him <3

-

01:57

rip bentley

-

01:59

aziraphale: “we are here to lick some serious butt!!”

crowley: “kick!! kick, aziraphale, for heaven’s sake”

-

02:06

i freaking love the parallel between the Them and the horsemen in the book

and i love that they did face shots to show the parallel

pepper = war

wensleydale = famine

brian = pollution

adam = death

the parallel is less clear for brian and wensleydale, at least in the show. was more obvious in the book. but at the same time i kind of got confused between them a lot, brian was always eating, but wensleydale was named after cheese

-

02:14

pepper: “i do not endorse everyday sexism”

/STOMPS ON WAR’S FOOT

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

-

02:25

shadwell: “anyone who wants ta get ta the hoore of babylon will have to get past me”

earlier anathema said “boyfriend”

may i point out that all the adults are paired up

shadwell & madame tracy

newt & anathema

......and....

aziraphale and crowley

-

0:28

crowley: “we are FUCKED”

these two need a holiday

-

azi: “come up with something... or.... or i’ll never talk to you again”

he knows crowley loves him aww

perfect blackmail material

-

02:32

they went from trying to kill him to being his gay angel parents real quick

-

02:35

thought they were holding hands for a second there

edit: regardless, a whole damn airfield and they’re 2cm apart

-

02:39

happy ending for the postman, hooray~

-

crowley about the bookshop, softly: “it burned down. remember? you can stay at my place”

awwWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

-

02:42

CROWLEY GOT HIS CAR BACK AND YET HE TOOK A TAXI

-

02:45

anathema: “why is your car called dick turpin?”

newt: “dick turpin is a famous highwayman. it’s called dick turpin because everywhere it goes, it holds up traffic”

i laughed

this wasn’t in the book and i always wondered

-

02:51

i wonder if holy water wouldn’t burn him because he’s too good

-

03:00

gabriel: “don’t talk to me about the greater good, sunshine, i’m the angel fucking gabriel”

really enjoying these swears

-

03:03

i thought so

-

03:30am

paused for a bit to get ready for bed

i thought it was after 4am but nope

-

“there would be other summers, but not one like this. not ever again”

that genuinely makes me emotional

i think that’s why it’s my favourite book, i can relive that summer with them

-

03:35

omg

-

OH MY GOD

WAIT

THEY

OH MY GOD

THEY WEREN’T IMMUNE, THEY JUST SWAPPED PLACES

HOLY SHIT

edit: THIS WAS NOT IN THE BOOK AND IT’S BRILLIANT AND I’M GLAD IT’S HERE

-

crowley: “let me tempt you to a spot of lunch?

azi: “~temptation accomplished~!”

THEY’RE SO STINKING CUTE

-

“just enough of a bastard to be worth knowing”

perfect

STILL NO USE OF “DEAR” THOUGH AND IT’S KILLING ME

-

that ending with the bird made me teary-eyed

-

credits: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH AS SATAN

WOW

OKAY

AKSFJDSF /snorts

-

the end credits and the song i just wanna bawl my eyes out

i loved this so much and i’m so glad it was GOOD

i loved that they added so many people of colour. in the book i imagined crowley played by alexander siddig (star trek: deep space 9 era) but i guess david tennant makes a pretty good crowley too

i’m trying not to be upset that my favourite scene with the dove and aziraphale’s affectionate use of “dear” was taken out

but 

this was damn good regardless. even gayer in places than in the book

-

this nightingale song is my new favourite song

i never got the reference before

“and as we kissed and said goodnight, an nightingale sang in berkeley square:

GAY

SO GAY

i love

-

the end of the credits “For Terry”

ACTUAL OUT LOUD SOBBING

TERRY YOU WOULD’VE LOVED THIS

NEIL DID YOU PROUD

-

oh this was so beautiful

i’m gonna watch it again with my family probably within the week. i’m so emotionally tender now

azIRAPHALE WAS SO FLUFFY AND CROWLEY WAS SO NICE ABOUT THE BOOKS

ugh i love them more than ever

anathema...... i don’t know if i relate to her, want to be her, look up to her, want her to mentor me, live with her, or find her attractive. maybe all of the above. but she was freaking PERFECT. PE R F E CT 

the casting was so... just right. thank you casting people for anathema.

like... i also didn’t mind the newt/anathema thing so much now. it was hard to tell in the book how much of a relationship they had after, but that smile she gave while lying in bed the morning after, that worked, it said a lot. and i like that it was her choice to burn the prophecy sequel rather than newt’s suggestion

gabriel was amusing. like.. i’m glad he wasn’t in the book. but he was great here. also really like michael and uriel. uriel was so damn beautiful.

i also would really have liked to see a mention of the fact crowley and aziraphale are both agender and potentially asexual. not even a hint of it here. buuuuuut it guess i know from the book. so.

my favourite episode was of course episode 3 with crowley and aziraphale’s 6000 year backstory. especially the 1940s bit where crowley saved the books <3

this show was was less confusing than the book too. ugh it was done so well

OH

we didn’t see where the soldier guy went when aziraphale zapped him away!!! in the book he reappeared safely back home and went out to see his family. to be fair i don’t know whether he died and went to heaven, but it was a nice thing to happen

and they took out the Them’s bully/rival gang, who was led by the third baby from the baby swap, and who won awards for his tropical fish. at least that’s what i remember. which meant the parallel about heaven/hell being rival gangs was lost here. but the parallel between the horsemen and the them was stronger than ever and i loved that.

look, i mean, 10 out of 10, EASY.

favourite thing? yes. yes, absolutely.

--

shoutout to the one time i wrote a Good Omens/Destiel crossover fic The Angel Cake Challenge

IT’S 04:02am THIS TOOK ME 12 HOURS

04:40am AND FORTY MINUTES TO EDIT

congrats if you made it to the end of this!!! thank you for reading <3 AND GO WATCH THE SHOW IF YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY

#Good Omens #Good Omens spoilers #Elmie watches things #post of postiness #Crowley x Aziraphale #long post #mobile users...... i am so... SO sorry #i hope you can scroll fast #The Angel Cake Challenge

[kensboytoy]

The Classifieds Ch. 1

Title: The Classifieds Fandom: Beetlejuice (Movie) Pairings: Beetlejuice/Reader Ratings: Explicit Chapters: 1/? Summary:  A curious leaflet falls into your possession on the day you move into your new place. You decide to call on the services of one 'bio-exorcist' and realize that you might be crushing pretty hard on a dead guy. How seductive can a sleaze like Beetlejuice really be?

Continue Reading or Read on AO3!

Moving into a new place was already a pain in the neck. Moving all by yourself? The worst. Well, except when you donated all your furniture to Goodwill because you knew that you weren’t strong enough to lug it up the teetering second story floor where your new place was. So, three big poofy comforters, several dozen pillows, stuffed animals, and many, many boxes full of weird 80’s toys later… Well, you collapsed in your makeshift nest and enjoying the rest of your busy evening in total silence.

The only lights you had were battery-powered string lights because the electric company hadn’t turned the power on yet, so you made it a lazy, comfy space all your own.

But without power, you couldn’t sit down and edit on your laptop or even use your phone (you’d need it to be on power-saving mode until the lights came on.) So you tried reading. That worked until the sun went down and your shitty vision was impaired. Then you tried sleeping but every creak of the apartment settling gave you a fright.

You idly flipped through the leaflets you had gotten in the mail around, squinting to see if there were any coupons to use. A small business card fell into you lap:

Betelgeuse: The 'Bio-Exorcist' 

Call BETELGEUSE, BETELGEUSE, BETELGEUSE!

You snorted. It was cute! Maybe you wouldn’t throw it away. But… there was no number on the back? You flipped it around and held it to the light. Nada.

“Pft. Like a dorkier version of Bloody Mary.” There was a smile on your face and you folded the paper up neatly to put in your wallet.

With a yawn and a stretch, you arose from your nest and waltzed into the bathroom to brush your teeth. The only light you had was a pocket flashlight you had gotten along attached to a rape whistle from some medical center long ago. You stared into the mirror for a moment as you patted your face with a warm towel.

“Bloody Mary, I don’t believe in you. Bloody Mary, I don’t believe in you. Bloody Mary, I don’t believe in you.”

You waited. Nothing. You shrugged your shoulders. That myth had been scary when you were younger but it never yielded any results.

As you started brushing out your hair, you continued.

“Beetlejuice. Beetlejuice…”

Another yawn and you closed the medicine cabinet before you changed into your nightgown and waltzed back into your bedroom. You flopped into your makeshift bed and stared at the card once again.

“What the hell is a Beetlejuice?”

Had you been looking at the mirror for a moment longer, you would’ve seen Bloody Mary, hair done up in curlers and charcoal face mask covering her very surprised expression before flickering away the moment you began to speak the words for the other spirit.

He was… stronger? Maybe that was the wrong word. Mary only had a passing interest in terrifying people, whereas Beetlejuice?

He thrived on it. Hell, almost got off on it, if he was honest. There was something delicious about scaring the living shit out of breathers.

So, Mary never stepped in when it was clear that the person had moved onto summoning him, instead. It’d be rude.

And summon him you did.

The lights flickered for a moment before shutting off, throwing the entire room into a pitch-black darkness that shouldn’t have been possible. Some of the light outside should still have been filtering in, or at the very least there should have been moonlight. Something. Anything. but all you got was darkness.

Darkness and the faint feeling that you were no longer the only one there.

After a brief moment, there was the distinctive sound of slithering and something crawled across your foot, wrapping around it as the lights flickered back on to reveal a… guy?

Well, a slob. He was normally built everywhere except for his stomach where he was decidedly bulky enough with a round beer belly. His hair was wild and all over the place - you couldn’t decide if his hair was white, blond, or green from the moss covering every inch of him. He looked like a bad Halloween decoration you’d leave on the porch to scare neighbors away from trick-or-treating.

“Why hell-o there, sweetcheeks,” he purred, voice somewhere between when you inhaled a fat cigar and the flush of a toilet. “You called?”

You yelped, flinging your blanket off you in a state of panic before grabbing your phone and fumbling to turn the camera light back on. You didn’t have a chance. The lights came back on to illuminate the figure in front of you and you shrunk in your seat.

And then you squinted.

“What the fuck?” you managed to gasp. “What the ever-loving fuck.”

Your hands instinctively reached for a pillow to cling onto for dear life and to use as a potential weapon if he got any closer.

“Holy fuck, there’s a fucking crazy homeless man in my fucking house and he looks like Riff-Raff from Rocky Horror fucked a pile of moss. What the fuck.”

Had you not been completely terrified, you would have said he was kinda cute. Kinda. If you were into creepy corpses with shit-eating grins.

“I understood-” Beetlejuice paused, counting on his grimy fingers for a moment and having to think about what he was about to say. “More than half of those words, I think. But I’ll go ahead and treat ‘em like compliments, babes.”

There was a wide grin on his face that displayed his crooked teeth and showed off some of the most prime real estate for bugs that existed in this or any other plane of existence. It would have been charming to a certain type of people, but as you had not taken any hard drugs in your life, the chance of you being one of those types of people was slim.

Spitting into one hand and using it to slick his hair back in a manner that usually turned a few stomachs, the ghostly, grody apparition leered down at you in what could almost be likened to a man leering at his hangover-curing breakfast after a long night drinking.

“Beetlejuice, at your service. Bio-exorcist and professional haunter since the late black plague.” He swiftly bowed and smirked. “What can I do for ya, little breather?””

“Oh, you’re Beetlejuice? I mean, I guess… that makes sense.”

You paused and sat up, staring at him over and over again, your heart still racing. He certainly made the place smell damper than an apartment in this neck of the woods usually was.

“Uh. Your ad - well, I found your ad in my mail. It was pretty vague. It just said to call your name three times-”

You reached out and touched his leg and then quickly recoiled. Oh, he was real. You were not dying.

“What the fuck. Am I really seeing you? I swear to God I don’t use coke or anything weird and - holy shit - you’re real.” You poked at him. “You’re actually here and not some Hatsune Miku hologram what the fuck is happening.”

You scrunched your face up and furrowed your brow.

“Bio-exorcist? …Living exorcisms?” you frowned. “Shouldn’t it just be ‘exorcist’?”

Pursing his dangerously chapped lips, the poltergeist frowned at you and let his bushy brows furrow into a look of confusion, mimicking your expression.

“I’m real, dollface. What, you didn’t think my business card was serious?”

Oh, now that was worrying. He’d spread those out as much as possible during his last visit to the world of the living, and what if people were just calling him up for no reason other than thinking it was just some prank?

“Just ‘cause I ain’t flesh and bone doesn’t make me any less real.”

Then the subject of bio-exorcism. Oh, one of his favorite topics, aside from how good he was with his tongue and how easily he could drink anyone in any dimension under the table. Despite the fact that sometimes, he did drink under the table.

Not a lot of bars liked that. Wasn’t really a good party trick either.

“I'm here for spirits, y’see? If some living jackass moves into their place, I chase ‘em out. Keep the crib empty. Make sure no one’s tryin’ to regular-exorcise them.”

You frowned.

“Well, like I said, it was pretty vague. Slipped in with the coupons you usually think you’re going to use but never end up using.” You took out your wallet and removed the slip before handing it over to him. It was one of his more vague cards that left out the specific details of his gig. “There was something about it that just made me… I dunno.”

You, being the sweet young thing you were, blushed and cleared your throat gently.

“I’m really sorry - honestly I am. But I… Well, how to put this very gently and in a sincere way… I personally don’t believe in ghosts. Not saying they can’t be out there, especially not after that crazy weird stunt you just pulled.”

You held up your hands defensively, trying to show that you didn’t mean any harm.

“If I did, I think that’d open a lot of gates to my already hard-to-deal-with trauma.”

Then, you sighed and slumped back in your big cushion of a bed to stare up at him. You were studying him in what little light there was now that it was back on. He didn’t really look like he was fucking around.

“But I guess this might shake that idea up.” Your eyebrow perked up in inquiry. “Are you some sort of ghost advocate? Like… their protector?”

“Their… protector?”

Beej stared, open-mouthed and slack-jawed for a long moment before leaning back and slapping a hand across his knee as he let out the world’s loudest hoot of laughter and fell into hysterics.

Oh, first you didn’t believe in ghosts, and now you thought he was there to protect them? That was absolutely rich.

Just because he worked for them didn’t mean that he was suddenly their protector.

Tears of absolute mirth rolled down his ghostly cheeks, the spirit having to try a few times before he could actually stop laughing. Chuckling and wheezing a few more times before he could actually calm down enough to answer you, he glanced down at you and let his face fall utterly blank.

“No.”

A wave of his hand and a cloud of smoke, a pair of reading glasses appeared perched upon his face along with a booklet in his already outspread palm.

“I am solely here to facilitate the removal of pre-mortem nuisances from the property of any spirits, hauntings, or those of the ghostly persuasion,” came the weirdly educated, prim and proper voice before it dropped down a few registers to rock tumbler. “I boot living folks out of ghost homes.”

You shrugged, not fazed by his childish behavior. Sure, you thought he was weird and yeah, it was freaky to have a stranger in your house. But for all you knew, he was harmless. Annoying but harmless.

“Well, I’m not a ghost and there ain’t one here, my dude. I don’t think I need your services…” You frowned and opened up your wallet again, this time grabbing a couple twenty dollar bills and handing it to him. “I feel like an asshole for calling you. I was gonna use that for take-out but I think you should have it. Y’know. For showing up to perform your services of, uh, removal. Like a cancellation fee you gotta pay if you fuck up.”

You thought for a moment. And then uttered words you never thought you’d ever say:

“Or you could hang around here for awhile. Lights aren’t on and there’s no cable… But I could order that food for two-” Wait. “Uh, if you eat? Sorry. I don’t want to seem ignorant. I just. This shit is a lot to process.”

Annoyed at yourself, you rubbed the bridge of your nose.

“What I’m saying is that even though there aren’t ghosts, you can kick it if you don’t want to go back to wherever I summoned you from. Can’t imagine it was pleasant.”

“No ghosts, huh? What 'm I, chopped liver?”

As if to prove his point, Beetlejuice kept very steady eye contact with you as he reached into his torso and stuck a hand out the other side, the other moving to yoink off his head and alas-poor-Yorick with it.

Practical effects were good. But to do that on the fly? And as convincingly as he did?

That wasn’t really… something possible.

Beetlejuice pulled his hand back through and replaced his noggin as he stared right at you, one grimy brow lifted as he wordlessly pocketed the bills. Even if he didn’t typically use living money, there was still bartering worth in the paper. He could always sell it to some sentimental dumbass who missed the green of the living world.

Which were… far more people than most thought. Most would assume that the first thing you’d do when you died is embrace socialism.

But apparently not.

You grimaced. Not because the sight was scary to you - you had grown up on horror movies. It was just the suddenness of his motions that unnerved you. You ran your fingers through your hair and shook your head before he continued.

“And we do eat. it isn’t something we need to do, but it’s… fun. Little reminder of breather life.”

“This is nuts. I’m talking to a dead guy on my first night in my new place. Who the fuck even prepares you for this shit?” You sighed and moved towards the edge of your bed. “Look, man, I’m going to play the dumb living human card a lot tonight and I’m sorry but…”

You eyed him up and down again curiously.

“I didn’t even think there was a God or an afterlife - to me this just feels like some drug trip. But… you’re real.” You stood up to walk around him. Your hand gently touched his lapel, fingers sliding down the fabric before you pulled away. “I’m having a fucking existential crisis with some zoot zuit wearin’ - pimp? - showing up because I said his fucking name three times.”

Your eyes locked with his briefly.

“I’m guessing say it another three times send you back to - Hell? Purgatory? So I won’t, ‘Juice. Unless this is painful to be here.”

Annoyed at the situation, you rubbed your tired eyes. Without another word, you unlocked your phone and pulled up a Chinese delivery place's menu.

“Well, dinner’s on me. I promise not to ask you anymore super stupid questions if you stay. Lord knows I’m too dumb to get this shit. But, uh. Company would be cool. If you want.” You blushed. It wasn’t like you were asking him for a date. But you were curious if you could learn more. “Or I could send you back to whatever bliss awaits you. Uh. Dealer’s choice?”

His face contorted at the mere mention of the other side. Sure, it wasn’t eternal damnation. but it also wasn’t blissful. It was… mostly like being alive. Paperwork and jobs and having to still deal with money.

Capitalism didn’t stop along with someone’s heartbeat. No, the fucking system stuck around post-mortem. Perhaps there was some special place where the really exceptional people went - to some sort of good place - but Beej’d be fucked if he ever saw it or even heard mention of anything like that.

“Eugh. No, the longer I can stay topside, the better, dollface,” he grimaced, one eye following you as you walked around and examined him. And sure, he tried to look his best, puffing out his chest and sucking in the gut he had. After all, he did that around any pretty little thing he saw, on the off chance that… well…

That you’d wanna hitch a ride on the B.J. Express. First and only stop: Fucksville.

Christ, that line was probably why he never got laid unless it was through the exchange of some cold, hard cash. He nearly owned a huge stake at Dante’s at this point.

“I'll stay with you,” he proclaimed, then as if he could read your mind, “Consider it a date. I'll pay ya back for this.”

“A date?” You didn’t sound repulsed like a normal person should have been. No, you were more perplexed. “A cool ghost pops into the world of the living and wants to go on a date with some random human - no wait, what did you call me, a breather?”

You laughed softly and handed your phone over to him, the menu pulled up. You rested your chin on your hand as you looked up at him quizzically.

“Not trying to presume anything, but, uh. I heard demons and shit were hot, right? I mean, you guys can have orgies and orgies without fear of STDs or baby-making. Plus, again, demon girls are hot. Now you’re stuck on a date with a breather?”

Figuring it was a joke, you shrugged.

“Whatever floats your boat. You don’t gotta pay me back. Like I said, I could use the company.” You flashed him a smile. “You are pretty cool, after all. It’d be nice if you stuck around…”

“Oh, yeah, no. Don’t get me wrong, succubi are great. They’ll ride you until you can’t see or walk straight. But, uh.”

Rubbing the back of his head, he tried to think of something to say that wouldn’t be an outright lie, but that wouldn’t make him seem like too much of a creep. After all, most folks didn’t go for creeps. And those who did? They were usually into the stereotypical “hot stalker” creep. No, he couldn’t blow this shit with his usual molestation and upfront attitude. He might actually have a chance here.

“They don’t tend to be my type. Waaaaaay too aggressive. I prefer to be the one in charge,” he said, glancing at the living human to see what sort of reaction that would have on you. To see if you scoffed, turned red, or both.

To see if you would be into banging.

You blushed. Well, you had asked so you couldn’t be mad. Not like you were. Beetlejuice seemed gross and weird but… no alarm bells were ringing yet.

“So I was right about the pimp suit?” you chuckled. “Well, if you wanna live lavishly like a King then by all means, order whatever you want. Just be careful ‘bout the duck. It’s the fanciest thing on that menu but…”

You waved your hand flat out as if to say so-so.

“Not worth it. The kung pow chicken? Super bomb.”

You relaxed back in your cushions and waited for him to place his order.

“I get more of a switch vibe from you, Juice. But I’ll believe you. I’d be confident with a cool suit too.” You pursed your lips for a moment. “Did you die in that suit or do you get to pick your outfits in the afterlife?”

A switch?

Oh, that was entirely true. Hell, if anything Beej could be a pushover if someone batted their eyes and pursed their lips in the right way. But would he ever admit to it outside of either regular or sexy torture?

Never.

...well, maybe. But he’d have to be either overwhelmingly drunk or high to do so. He didn’t like to admit that there was any part of himself that was anything other than a smooth-talking, dominant, seductive casanova, but he knew that secretly there may have been something that wasn’t wholly dominant about him.

However, he wasn’t about to let this pretty young thing know. Not unless there was a whip or stilettos involved.

“Nah, doll. I'm all daddy.” He thumped his chest at that, shooting you his best smile. Which was more like looking at a pane of broken glass.

“And this old thing? Buried in it, but can change if I want. I just think it adds a certain charm, don’t you agree?”

You giggled, delighted that this old dirt bag used such a trendy title. Sure, older gals used to call men Daddy all the time, but the way he said it wasn’t exactly in that context. It was more like the horny millennial fad.

“You must have been fucking some younger spirits to get that lingo, Daddy-O,” you teased, purposely using the outdated version of the name.

At his narcissistic question, you decided to indulge him just a little bit.

“I like it. Not everyday someone pulls off stripes so well,” you complimented to boost his ego. “If only I could see you properly, but all these little lights can only show me just a little taste.”

Maybe he could light up the room. If you goaded him with compliments… Free utilities were free utilities, man.

“I guess a Daddy does need a suit. Maybe a nice belt…”

Oh, you hoped it was too dark to see your clever little smirk. You liked playing this game with a dead man.

“But it depends on what kinda Daddy you are, Juice. The word is so carelessly used nowadays. So many wimps using it to sound cool.” Woah, hello sudden confidence. It was nice to feel like you weren’t some meek geek. “There are lots of ways to wear the name up here in the living.”

Oh, but he wasn’t going to fold just like that. Even if you were acting so confident, Beej still had enough ego to topple civilizations. Granted, had you taken the lead and pushed him over, that would be a completely different story.

But as it was? He could deal with words.

At least until you either started pointedly giving commands or begging for his cock. Either of those - anything that was explicit and couldn’t just be mistaken for simple flirting - and he would be a goner.

With a snap of his grimy fingers, the lights buzzed and came on. Not with their usual electric glow, but with what almost seemed like candlelight from within. He wasn’t really turning the power on - he was using them to conduct a different light source.

And from there? His suit was all the easier to see. Along with the very obviously hard cock that pressed against the front of those striped slacks.

“How’s about it, dollface? Like what you see?” he purred, running a hand down his body for either your amusement, or for your enjoyment. Depended on whether or not you were just teasing to be a tease, or if you would actually go for a roll in the hay. “Does Daddy measure up to what you were thinking?”

You gawked. You stared! Your eyes were round like dinner plates. That blush burned your face so suddenly that it was an obvious tell. And your heart nearly skipped a beat. That was very unexpected, despite you explicitly trying for this very result.

Beetlejuice was gross. But in a very, very attractive way. A slob with charm.

“O-oh wow,” you murmured. Bashfully, you looked away and grabbed the pillow you were holding earlier. You bit your lower lip. You didn’t find it wrong to embrace being dirty, but part of you felt like it would be too ‘slutty’ of yourself to start flirting harder. The ghost just met you - would you really want to mess with someone who would hit it and quit it?

“That and more,” came the soft reply. “You sure I called a bio-exorcist and not some other dirty line?”

Cautiously, you sat forward in your seat and looked up at him. God, he was cute.

“I can see lots of us living folks calling you up.” You wet your lips eagerly. Then, you paused. And blushed even harder.

It was then that you realized that you were only in your pajamas. No underwear underneath, nada! Just the thin fabric of your shirt and pants. It was pretty revealing in this light if you could look at yourself the way he was leering at you.

“I-I feel very underdressed compared to you… Um. Sh-should I change into something nicer? I, uh, don’t want you to think I look like a trash goblin.”

Oh, he could instantly see that you were hardly wearing anything once the lights flickered on, his eyes doing a full sweep of your body and taking in your warm, plush form as he felt his cock twitch. Hell, it was probably something that was very visible.

A slow grin spread over his face, Beetlejuice leaning in and reaching out to touch your thigh as he gave his lips a long lick. Entirely done just to draw attention to how long and talented his tongue looked. Just wanting to spur you on and encourage the little slut to get up and climb over and onto his lap.

“Oh, not at all. I think you look good enough to eat, babes.”

Slut? Was that already what he was thinking of you as?

Well, given that some of his favorite folks were sluts? Including himself? He thought of slut as a term of honor - the way some folks might call their pals bastards.

Almost immediately, the hand on your thigh slid further inwards, pressing against the clothed flesh of your cunt. Straight to the point. After all, as much as Beetlejuice did love himself some good bush, he hated to beat around it.

His thumb set to stroking you through the thin fabric of your pajama bottoms, the lights beginning to dim a bit more. Grow hazier. Grow more seductive. in line with his mood and actions.

“In fact… I think i could forego dinner for somethin’ sweeter.”

You stared at that tongue for a moment and let your face feel hotter. It was clear you liked what you saw. There was a small piece of your mind telling you not to let some creep get it on the first date, but...

He was cute. Gross. Very, very much so. But he was a poltergeist just looking for fun.

When he touched you, you gasped involuntarily. Your back stiffened along with your now hardened nipples and you froze. What should you say to that bold statement?

“Do you do this to all the humans who summon you or did I catch you in a mood?” you breathed. It wasn’t a denial or a refusal. And from how the thin fabric clung to your wet self, that very much indicated that you were already turned on from the sight of him.

“You haven’t even been here ten minutes and you’re already so handsy.”

You tried to be as playful as you could despite being so nervous.

“Don’t tell me you’re gonna skip foreplay and try and get to it… Why, that would be no fun at all, Daddy.”

Oh, you were playing with fire now.

“Well, when I see such a cute little doll, surely you can’t blame me for being so eager to get to know you,” he purred, fingers slipping past the fabric as soon as he could see that you wouldn’t put up a fight and plunging knuckle-deep into your soaked little cunt. Getting a good feel for what he’d be fucking later.

And then you insinuated that he wasn’t gonna give you any foreplay. Beetlejuice didn’t take kindly to that. He may have been a pervert, a scoundrel, a knave, a bastard, a…

He forgot where he was going with that.

Oh, right. he may have been all of those things, but he was also an egotistical prick. Meaning that if he could have someone begging for his cock after being teased for hours, then he would put in the extra effort.

So one of his striped tentacles slipped forward, curling up your shirt to wrap around your tits and mimic fucking them.

“Are you gonna be good and let me have what I want, babes? Or does Daddy have to take it?”

With your cunt throbbing and body aching for his touch, you moaned abruptly as soon as he entered you with those dirty digits. You squirmed and let your tight hole wrap around him, tightening as he played around. The tentacle was what really caught you by surprise. There was a small squeak from your lips and you tensed up before allowing him to continue.

Oh, was he threatening you?

“Well… what happens if I struggle?” you asked curiously. It was clear you were a little freak who enjoyed the idea of both. “Will that tentacle make sure I join you in the afterlife?”

You were pouting a bit up at him. Your body wanted him to continue, that was clear. But you wanted to know which side of the dice to roll.

“I wanna know what Daddy’s capable of - if he’s mean or if he wants to be playful…”

“Depends on how you act, sweetheart. Daddy’d love to just be playful, but if you don’t behave…”

He leaned in at that, rancid breath blowing in cold clouds along your skin as he chuckled to himself. Wondering what your reaction to his next words would be; if they would repulse you, or if you’d be hornier than ever.

Thankfully, he was already buried knuckle-deep in the best lie detector there was when it came to something like that.

“Daddy’s fucked dollies that were unwilling before. That fought and screamed and cried.”

Oh, he didn’t even touch on if he would kill you for not behaving or not. He was a vengeful spirit, of course he would. He knew that there was life after death, so dooming a toy to forever have to be fucked by him? Essentially creating his own undead sex slave? It’d be like heaven for him. honestly, it was kind of a wonder he hadn’t done it yet. Well, he did like it when they were warm, after all.

“But Daddy knows best.”

Your heart started to beat faster at that. You weren't scared - no… quite the opposite. Thrilled? You were playing with a powerful being now. One that could kill you in an instant but was deciding to indulge your dirty fantasies. Maybe he could sense what freaky shit you were into. The more likely thing was that he hadn’t had a proper fuck in awhile and now had a prime toy to test out.

Your cunt constricted around his fingers, being the dead giveaway that he needed that you were indeed a little freak.

“What does Daddy like best? When they cry or when they give in easily?” You watched him closely for a response, your teeth raking over your bottom lip. “I…”

You were very embarrassed at the next words that fell from your lips:

“Wanna make sure ‘m good enough for you and can keep up..”

Beetlejuice grinned at that. Because even if he did enjoy forcing himself upon people and watching as their will slowly drained away until they were nothing but pliant little fuckpuppets… He had to admit to being charmed by obedience. It was pretty rare that people actually begged for him. Most were disgusted by, well, all of him. The only good lays had been at Dante’s and those were paid for. Having a willing, breathing slut? Oh, that was priceless.

And so, he stroked your hair. Rewarding you for being so good for him so far. Good enough to make his cock throb and leak. Leak a nasty green, glowing ooze.

Ectoplasm. It wasn’t just something that the dead produced on their flesh when trying to scare the living. No, since their bodies technically couldn’t produce real cum, it made do with the closest thing it had.

“I like both. but you’re being such a good doll for Daddy. I'm thinking being willing’s gonna be the hottest thing you can do.”

You could see the bulge in his pants, your eyes widening like two full dinner plates. Eagerly, you wet your lips. His fingers were still curling and uncurling in you that you almost found it so unfair that you couldn’t see what he had in his pants. Your imagination was running wild! Was it a tentacle like the one groping your tits? Or maybe it was something even more peculiar? Dude was a straight up ghost! He could have anything.

Whatever it was, you were eager to have it be inside you.

So you sidled up closer to him and gently sat on his lap, not wanting to crush the poor poltergeist under you. You had no idea what his limitations as a now corporeal being really was so you played it safe.

Shyly, you fiddled with his tie and bit your lip, worrying the skin until it broke. How was one supposed to flirt with a ghost that was knuckle-deep in your pussy? God, he was so handsome…

“Good,” you murmured, mouth so dangerously close to his. “I wanna be good for you, Beej.”

#Works of Oz #Writing #Beetlejuice #(Yes I plan to do ALL versions of Beetlejuice for my fics soon!) #Fanfiction

[itsclydebitches]

RWBY Recaps: The Shining Beacon Part 2

I miss RWBY. Specifically, I miss early RWBY when there was less drama (not really but let me pretend), so let’s head on back to Volume 1.

In our opening scene of Episode 3, Ruby and Jaune have managed to find the hall where the rest of the newbies are meeting and honestly? I’m super proud of them for it. These are the two fools who will later argue over who had the map while wandering around the wilds of Remnant. Baby leaders managing to find the rest of their flock? Great job. Well done. Mama’s proud.

This little time skip raises some questions though. Did they ever find the Beacon cafeteria? What else did they chat about the rest of the day? Yang makes it sound like they’ve been gone a number of hours and I for one would love to know what awkward Ruby and even-more-awkward Jaune got up to during that time.

Tis the realm of fics though, not canon. Instead we get another shot of RWBY’s infamous shadow people with Yang standing out like the goddamn sun.

Who could the main character possibly be??

Beats me. What a gosh darn difficult question.

Yang: Ruby! I saved you a spot.

Are... are there spots, Yang? You’re all standing in a giant auditorium. If Ruby comes to stand beside you is another student gonna throw a fit about it? I mean real talk, I went to watch the changing of the guard while spending a month in London and let me tell you, there were people who guarded their spots like a pissed off bird guarding her eggs. (For the record you couldn’t even see anything. This was just human prickliness at its finest). So who knows, maybe Yang knows precisely what she’s doing.

Ruby abandons Jaune to join her, which on the one hand is kinda mean—you can’t invite your new friend to stand around with you?—but Ruby does say she’ll “see [him] after the ceremony,” so that’s nice and all. I know my anxious ass would have been thrilled to hear someone making future plans like that, even if it’s mostly just a nicety. Making new friends is hard.

Of course, Jaune doesn’t make that job any easier on himself. I’ve written before about his Nice Guy tendencies in the early volumes and they come back in full force here. He bemoans Ruby’s leave, asking himself where he’ll find “another nice, quirky girl to talk to?” It’s an easy introduction for Pyrrha, revealing her behind Jaune and quite obviously setting her up as that “nice, quirky” girl who he’ll become closest to as the episodes progress, but jeez, Manic Pixy Girl assumptions abound. Especially given the fact that Jaune/Pyrrha became canon in Volume 3. Obviously Pyrrha will be written with great depth as RWBY continues, but it does rankle a bit to have her introduced as a Ruby stand-in, someone positioned as a way of fulfilling Jaune’s ridiculous “needs.” I’m glad this is undermined later when she takes initiative towards him, i.e. saving him during initiation and angling to be his partner. Her interest is clear even if at that point Jaune will take anyone pretty: Ruby, Weiss, Pyrrha herself.

But I digress.

Ruby gives her whole spiel about meeting Weiss and Yang’s response is, “Yikes. Meltdown already?” heavily implying that she expected Ruby to have a “meltdown” at this school, just not so soon. Which—iffy terminology aside—isn’t at all surprising. RWBY does an excellent job of setting up Ruby’s nerves, from her “bee’s knees” comment to her eagerness in showing Weiss exactly what she’s capable of. The girl is desperate for validation—as is the whole RWBYJNPR gang, in their own ways—and a lot of that comes out as anxious, social awkwardness. If Ruby was at all inclined towards “meltdowns” at Signal then I’d say she did a damn good job holding herself together through everything that happened at Beacon. Granted, being put in a position of power will help with that, at least on a surface level. To semi-quote Oz, how can you expect others to put forth their best if you’re not constantly doing the same? Ruby has the veneer of self-control down now because she had to for her team... which makes me anticipate her inevitable breaking point all the more. We saw in Volume Six how close Ruby got to dropping her ‘I’m an endlessly put together leader’ persona with Qrow drinking himself to oblivion, but she never quite got there. I’m waiting (hoping really) that Ruby’s long-established anxiety will finally be addressed, what with Yang having made good headway in that department and all the shit they’ve gone through adding up to a very justified breakdown.

Let the poor girl really falter for once and let the rest of the group grapple with that. Everyone deserves it.

I’m jumping six volumes ahead though. Here and now Ruby is still telling Yang all about her horrible encounter, segueing into how she “just wanted her to stop yelling” which of course is the perfect moment for Weiss to sneak up behind her with a loud “YOU!” (Jaune’s comment linking to Pyrrha; Ruby’s comment linking to Weiss—RT enjoys writing these little bridges, particularly for introducing new characters).

I love this moment simply for how much it tells us about Weiss. Largely in retrospect. Because while her trailer song is definitely on the nose in some respects—“I’m the loneliest of all”—it’s not until later on that we realize exactly how abusive Weiss’ family is and how isolated she’s been for the whole of her upbringing. This girl has absolutely no experience interacting with people outside of the Schnee/everyone else hierarchy (note in a moment how she assumes that Ruby will want to “make it up to [her]”) so if you’re suddenly surrounded by people for the first time who aren’t fawning over your name and money and dust connections... what do you? How do you get some vaguely positive attention? Oh okay, guess I’ll force it! Here Weiss is claiming that she never wants Ruby to speak to her again, but she’s the one who barged in on their conversation and loudly drawing attention to herself. Weiss is starved for healthy validation while simultaneously stuck in the behavior she’s been taught: asking for attention solely by trying to show off— here’s a rambling summary of the Schnee Dust Company’s disclaimer look at what a good puppet I am—or by insulting others. Weiss mocks Ruby’s genuine offer to buy school supplies together but then doesn’t move away from her and Yang once the announcements start. She doesn’t know how to say ‘yes’ to any offers of friendship, but she also doesn’t want to say ‘no.’

Interestingly, that moment also tells us a fair bit about Ruby. Not just by re-emphasizing how kind she is by extending the offer to start this relationship over, but also adding weight to the headcanon that Ruby is neurodivergent. Weiss’ heavy sarcasm about how they can “go shopping, paint our nails, and talk about cute boys” goes right over Ruby’s head. She responds with a “Wow! Really?” similar to the “...can you?” heard right before she attacks the Nevermore during initiation. Ruby has a history of not just being awkward but missing a lot of ‘normal’ social cues as well.

The girls’ bonding is interrupted when Ozpin begins his speech and boy oh boy do I love this moment too. Anyone who reads my metas knows that I’m a firm defender of our disaster headmaster, especially after volume 6, and looking back this scene is the PERFECT example of how RT tries to make Ozpin seem shady... while really failing to accomplish that. Obscuring eyes/the whole face is a super easy way to tell the viewer that this is an Untrustworthy Character. See: every horror movie where the villain’s face is obscured by shadows, our own dear Adam who keeps his face hidden with a mask, etc. It serves to dehumanize the character, keeping us from seeing some of the most expressive parts of their bodies, and equates one thing they’re hiding—such as a deformity. Yay ableism! /s—with other things they’re keeping from the heroes; secrets, sinister intentions, and the like. The primary exception to this are characters who wear masks for defined and morally acceptable reasons. i.e. superheroes who need to keep their secret identities intact and, notably, aren’t withholding that information from the viewer. We as the audience usually know who they are and thus aren’t inclined to distrust the character based on secret-keeping.

Awesome superpowers aside, Ozpin doesn’t fit within the mold of superhero, so all of this reads as pretty damning:

Like holy shit, friends. With the exception of one moment, 

notably when Ozpin informs them that “knowledge will only carry you so far,” the cinematography goes out of its way to hide his eyes, if not his entire face. Oz comes across as super shady here, compounded by the close up and centered shot of Ruby’s silver eyes to contrast. Compounded further by the exchange Ruby and Yang have afterwards about how he seemed “kind of off”—an exchange that doesn’t precisely fit with in-world logic (how does Yang know what Ozpin is normally like?), but serves as a clear message to the viewer: Something is UP with this guy.

The problem? This isn’t Ozpin’s introduction.

Imagine a series where in Episode One we only hear about a powerful Beacon headmaster. Someone who bends the rules and let’s Ruby in two years early for reasons unknown. Then by Episode Three we see this guy almost insulting the new group of students (Yang’s eyes narrow when Ozpin says he sees only “wasted energy in need of purpose”) and the entire time the camera refuses to give us a good look at him. That would have set up a character who is legitimately creepy. Someone we know instinctively might not really be on our side.

Instead our introduction to Ozpin is this.

He’s smiling and charming and legitimately kind. He listens to why Ruby wants to come to Beacon before making his decision (aka establishing her agency here). He shares a fond “Aww, you know I’m gonna get what I want” look with Glynda. He brings cookies, for god’s sake. Ozpin’s supposed shadiness falls completely flat here because we’ve already developed positive feelings for him, notably while he was with our protagonist and his BFF headmistress. The intimacy in Episode One implies that this is the “real” Ozpin, whereas a formal speech in front of (from the audience’s perspective) a literally faceless mass sets this up as a “fake” Ozpin, one that comes out when he feels the needs to be stern with incoming students. Or, based on information we learn later, when he’s pulling from another personality.

All of which isn’t a criticism of RT’s writing. Rather, given what we now know definitively from Volume Six, I don’t think they were invested in making Ozpin into a legitimately shady character. What RWBY is invested in is poking at or outright dismantling a lot of tropes and conventions, which is essentially what they did here. “You EXPECT the secretive, powerful headmaster to be a morally gray kind of guy... so we’re just not even gonna go there. Not really.”

But back to the actual plot. Jaune ends the scene by sliding up and announcing that he’s a natural blonde, another excellent example of precisely the thing women aren’t looking for in a guy. He knows Ruby now so it’s totally cool for him to re-join her, but using that as an excuse to start talking about his looks? Nah. Remember folks, women generally like it when you treat them as more than just a romantic and/or sexual conquest!

But enough about Jaune. We cut to that night where all the newbie students—way more than we’ll actually see throughout the rest of the series—are crowded together in Beacon’s hall, which from a world building perspective is a really great choice. I love what it says about Beacon as an institution: We’re not giving you rooms yet because we believe that most of you will fail the initiation (or at least that’s the impression they want to give the students). There’s a sense of ‘roughing it’ with simple mats and no personal space, the sort of things they’d have to get used to if they’re out traveling as huntsmen later in life. The overall emphasis on community and team work. Like the teams of four, Beacon is invested in setting up situations where the students are forced to work with one another. Particularly with those they might otherwise avoid.

That’s precisely the sort of interaction we get in a moment, but first: a tangent. Okay. So in previous metas—mostly Volume Six stuff—I’ve gotten a lot of pushback for my use of the term “kids” to describe the RWBY gang. Which I get. Post-Beacon most of them are legally adults by our standards and they’re certainly doing Adult Things nowadays. I do think there’s a lot of interesting nuances here—the fact that our protagonist and arguably most significant character plot-wise (Oscar) are both still underage, asking whether Remnant even views age in the same way we do, whether hitting the magical age of 18 suddenly gives you any more insight or maturity than you had at 17 or 16, acknowledging that they were never meant to be out in the world fighting this war and making these decisions yet, so we shouldn’t conflate traumatic necessity with emotional growth—but for the most part fans don’t want to grapple with those sorts of questions. There’s a knee-jerk reaction (particularly from those who are around the group’s age) of, “Most of them are 18. They’re not kids so stop acting like they are.” RWBY has raised a lot of questions for me regarding how I balance “Kids/teens/young adults are people with agency and more maturity than people tend to give them credit for” with “I remember how much of a kid I still was at 18 and know precisely how much I’ve grown in the decade since. I was not an adult then, no matter what the law said.” It’s a matter of acknowledging generational experience without turning into one of those, “Bah! Kids don’t know what the hell they’re talking about” curmudgeons. I’m an adult with a father who dismisses everything I say because he’s got—and will always have—50+ years on me. I’m well aware that it sucks.

Why am I bringing all this up again? Because this scene is just so kid-ish. It’s wonderfully young and carefree! Ruby is writing a letter to her friends in cutesy grimm PJs. Yang slides over with a comment about how it’s just like a sleepover. They acknowledge that Tai would not be pleased with all the boys around while Yang ogles the shirtless guys and Jaune wanders around in a footed one piece. This entire scene has a distinctly middle school or early high-school vibe. Not that adults don’t hang out and chat in super comfy PJs—we totally do—but rather that viewers know how scenes like these are coded. They’re supposed to look young here and even though experience has most certainly aged them, even though about two years have passed since this moment... that’s still only two years. I have a difficult time accepting that we should now view the group’s decisions as irrevocably Adult and Mature (cough-airship-cough) when such a short time ago they weren’t either of these things. And they weren’t meant to be those things. Not yet. I wish that these later Volumes of RWBY were more interested in exploring the concept of (yes) kids forced into the role of adults, as opposed to trying desperately to pretend that they’re adults already with a more worthwhile voice than people with 10, 20, or in Ozpin’s case, a 1,000 years more experience than them.

Anyway. Enough ranting for one recap.

Ruby shares her fears about not making any friends and Yang has her “You’ve just made one friend and one enemy!” line before giving her little sis a legitimate pep-talk. She explains that there are friends all around Ruby, “you just haven’t met them yet.” A near identical perspective to what we heard from Jaune last episode. Which is hilarious given that ten seconds ago Yang was pseudo-insulting the guy.

Seriously though, how is there not more Jaune-Yang interaction in canon? They’re got so much more in common than just blonde hair and anger management issues.

Cue another segue. Right after Yang finishes talking about future friends Ruby catches a sound off screen and we get our first look at Blake since the courtyard.

Yang quite literally drags Ruby over and it is an excellent display of siblings being siblings.

Blake recognizes Ruby as “the girl who exploded” and honestly I’m sad that this didn’t become a moniker for her in the same way “vomit boy” did for Jaune. Nothing like being defined by your embarrassing moments and ridiculous habits to encourage true bonding! My BFF calls me Trout and I call her Hunter and no, I will not expand on the ridiculousness that was my middle school years.

I mean, Ruby starts to tell Blake that she can call her crater face before realizing that this might not be the best idea. The girl is awkward af and I love her.

Yang: What are you doing??

Ruby: I don’t know help me!

God they’re so fucking relatable.

Yang manages to get Blake’s name out of her and then makes the mistake of commenting on her bow. Granted, Blake doesn’t show any overt signs of discomfort here—that would have been too obvious even by RWBY’s standards—but looking back we can assume that any conversation veering towards the one thing she wants to hide wouldn’t exactly endear her to these girls. Blake gets pretty rude by saying that she’ll continue to enjoy her book just as soon as they leave. Yang gets ruder by announcing, right next to Blake, that she’s a “lost cause.”

The book is Ruby’s in though. Now it’s less small talk and more legit interest as she asks what Blake is reading. The fandom has acknowledge to death the “It’s about a man with two souls, fighting for control” line and how that obviously relates to the Ozpin-Oscar situation, but beyond that I’m interested in the fact that we never learn the title of this book. Normally that wouldn’t mean much (only so much world building you can do and book titles aren’t necessarily the sort of thing RT wants to waste time on), except that Ruby specifically asks for it and Blake delves straight into the summary. I wonder if perhaps this specific text will show up again in future volumes. I don’t have any real evidence for the hunch, just the fact that we now know Ozpin has put stories out into the world that relate to his situation, namely The Maidens fairy tale. I have to wonder if perhaps other lives of his created art as a way of coping with their situation—unknowingly truthful accounts that people like Blake read, oblivious to the ways that this fiction might be setting them up to be more empathetic towards the same situation in real life. It just stands out to me that we’re not given a title or author here; that Blake was one of the ones to learn about Ozpin’s immortality off screen (denying us her initial reaction); that comparatively she was one of the more sympathetic during that awful moment out in the snow. It would be awesome if the “lol Blake is a nerd who sometimes reads porn” aspect of her personality actually sets her up to be one of the more understanding people in Volume 7.

Basically, please give me super nerd Blake who starts warming back up to Ozpin because she finds out he’s authored a bunch of her favorite books lol. Or at the very least she realizes that she’s now living the stories she’s long adored; she’s been given the opportunity to extend real support to someone so very like the characters she’s felt for all these years...

RWBY does love its meta.

Ruby admits to loving books too, particularly the fantastical stories that Yang used to read her. Blake is far more pessimistic.

Blake: Hoping you’ll live happily ever after? 

Ruby: I’m hoping we all will.

Hello, conflict of the entire series. As well as many fans’ hope for how it will all turn out. I’m personally not at all interested in a 7+ year investment with this cast only to watch them end on a bleak, or even bittersweet note. Despite what some might claim nowadays, happy endings are far from overrated. Given the state of the world, happy endings are radical.

Blake tells Ruby that her dreams are “Very ambitious for a child,” one of the very few indicators we’ve gotten (along with Weiss’ “Aren’t you a little young to be here?”) that the rest of the students recognize on sight that Ruby is younger than them. I’ve literally never heard one child refer to another, same-age acquaintance as “child.” Especially not when they’re hinting strongly that they’re being naive.

Yang is SUPER proud of that optimism though and starts a tackle hug that leads to them fighting cartoon style, complete with stars, cat noises, and dust clouds. The racket of course brings Weiss over. And by “of course” I mean “Oh look, another excuse she can use to go talk to the only people she knows here.”

We get another handful of great lines—Ruby has known Weiss a day but she was “always on [her] side,” Weiss exclaims that Ruby is “a hazard to [her] health”—but the episode is basically over. Blake blows out her candles and that’s that.

Meanwhile, I can’t believe I just wrote nearly four thousand words on a six minute episode. I’m gonna go re-think my life choices.

Minor Things of Note

“You’re lucky we weren’t blown off the side of the cliff!” Hey there, episode four foreshadowing! Also, Weiss, you guys are nowhere near a cliff. You’re so dramatic.

You can really see the difference in their expressions when Oz gives his speech. Ruby and Yang looked pumped and joyous. Weiss is anxious and unsure.

Still super interested in Ozpin actually using his cane as he leaves the stage. Probably just a random animation choice before they worked out all his character kinks, but if we imagine that his host was currently speaking maybe that’s a quirk specific to him.

We never again hear about “the gang back at Signal” that Ruby is writing to. Just like we never see the friends Yang apparently entered Beacon with (and weren’t meant to given that they were also shadow people). Not that RWBY needs any more characters to keep track of, but from an in-world perspective it is a little strange that they were supposedly super close to all these people and then just... never mention them again lol. 

#rwby #rwby recaps #mymetas #the shining beacon pt. 2