#its okay to reblog !! (if... anyone even wants that lmao)

[finely-tuned-line]

RP:

Log 218

FTL: FTLR-3 has taken the form of the cyan lizard that was its host. It remains immobile, but the form it has taken is clearly that of a cyan lizard. One especially similar to the one from which it originated from. I've described my hypothesis as to why it would do such a thing in Log 216, but to summarise, it's for the sake of efficiency. Efficiency of movement, efficiency of existence. It's taking the best of all three sub-types of Rot and combining it.

FTL: I fear that this new form may grant FTLR-3 a much extended range of movement that, especially when combined with its apparent ability to learn, could result in it breaking out of the containment chamber. If all goes well, this will not be the case. I will carry on in my attempts at creating a potent corrosive substance, just in case LIFEGIVER's treatment does not arrive on time.

FTL: As for updates on the progress of my attempts to create such a substance, there aren't many. The progress has been lacking and it all is strikingly reminiscent of my attempts to create organisms without a foundation. I do believe that I am on edge of something, though. I cannot tell you what, only that it will aid me in my quest.

FTL: The time after FTLR-3 is eradicated is eagerly awaited. I cannot allow myself to get distracted from this process at this time, but the thoughts of experiments I could be doing now are alluring to me. For example, Eternal Anomaly (as our conversation has unfortunately not yet ceased) mentioned a slugcat-poleplant hybrid.

FTL: Creating a hybrid with a poleplant is indeed a curious idea. One that I wish I could afford the time to explore at this moment. Perhaps not with a slugcat, that seems to defeat the purpose. Slugcats are insanely adaptable creatures, they can withstand just about any modifications. Though a slugcat-poleplant hybrid would have its benefits, my interest lies in the reactivity of the poleplants leaves. What if a poleplant's genetics that pertain to them were implanted into say, a lizard? Forgive me for the amount of experiments that lizards have been the main subject of.

FTL: The 'leaves' could function as a warning system, though perhaps it wouldn't be that much of an effective one. Append them onto the tail though, and they could perhaps warn the lizard of any vibrations in the ground. The red colouring the lizard would be sure to inherit from the poleplants would also serve as a deterrent to predators, invoking the image of a typical red lizard. It could also potentially employ the poleplant's typical hunting method of ambush. Though it would lack the ability to blend in.

FTL: Perhaps if the lizard that would be modified were a white lizard... its camouflage abilities, if combined with the reactiveness of the poleplant. Truly could make a capable predator, armed with many ways to protect itself from any that may threaten it. Its red leaves would make it stand out, even when camouflaged, but everything needs a weakness, no?

FTL: I'll have to put this idea on hold. After this whole fiasco is over, this will be the project I pick up. Just another incentive to get this over with as quickly as possible. I tire of researching FTLR-3, it has too much urgency to it. But I shall carry on doing so, as though my interest grows weaker as my attention attempts to drift elsewhere, I remain curious about its nature.

#no ftlr-3 isnt going to become a pet or smth #its just rot thats a lizard and its gonna get killed just like a lizard Ɛ> #ftl is gonna cry at all the research potential hell have lost tho lol #ALSO I LOVE MY AMATEUR SPECBIO THAT MAYBE DOESNT RLY MAKE SENSE FIGHT ME #eternal anomaly if you fuckin reply to this #that actually would be funny tho #ahem sidenote directed to ANYONE (passerbys. iterator (oc) blogs. random readers.): #YOU ARE FREE TO COMMENT ON THESE LOGS #not via the actual comment thing lol #but like #in-lore these are getting broadcasted out?? so #idk feel free to just say smth in asks (: #or reblog w a reply if youre an iterator oc blog #look i just want to talk to ppl LMAO #i am literally running out of ideas Ɛ\> #right im gonna stop this pathetic ramble #just pls talk to me i like talking as ftl its fun #OKAY BUT ALSO I LOVE SPECBIO #I DONT EVEN FUCKING TRULY KNOW WHAT SPECBIO IS I JUST KNOW THAT WHAT IM DOING TECHNICALLY COUNTS AS SPECBIO??? #its so fun #rp #ftl logs #rain world #rw lizards #<- im maintagging this fuck you #FUCK I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY ABT THIS LOG AAAAAAAA #tldr i likr specbio. ftl is just abt at his wits end with the whole rot thing; ves never had it for this long before #alright i should stop saying things #finely-tuned line

[s0fti3w1tch]

TMNT POLLS PSA

I've explained this in my reblog tags of this post, please keep the TMNT polls fun and please be sure that the AU/Iteration/Fic creators are actually okay with being part of them.

**Not about polls I've been added in, but polls I've seen, and growing trends me and others have noticed. As always, please don't harass anyone.

Specifically the more popularity-poll-ish ones, ones that teeter on or are straight up serious, it can be discouraging for those who didn't ask for it. Some may fear speaking up about it because other people are having fun despite how they themselves feel about it. Especially when polls specifically put one well-known fanwork over a smaller one. Worse yet when you're dropped into it without awareness from beforehand. Hell, even when the creators have a similar size, it can hurt.

I've recently gotten some anon messages like this. Though I haven't seen that attitude in response to my AU in polls, it's the type of attitude I've seen towards a couple other creators.

Being publicly compared to others by hundreds, sometimes up to thousands, can be anxiety-inducing. As easy as it is to say that "the unpopularity of your work should not discourage you," truth be told, there's truth to the saying "comparison kills creativity."

To have your work being used to put down someone else? Someone who's working just as hard? Who's just trying to share an idea just like you? Or to be dismissed?

As stated by the authors of MMC and OMO, while it may seem like you're uplifting your favorite in this, it's awkward. It can be stressful.

For those with less votes, it's hard not to think that yours is being called "less than." An "I've never heard of the other one lmao" can feel like a punch in the gut.

There's also animosity towards more bigger fanworks because of the pedestal they've been put on.

All that, and not even wanting to be there in there first place.

These things should and can encourage creativity and growth. AUs crossing over, banter, propaganda posts, etc.

Around the time Tumblr first rolled out the poll function, I was included in The Night AU creator's Sep AU polls. Me and the poll creator, Ray, both got last place in 2 respective polls, hence why we call TN!Leo/Green and TD!Leo/Trainee the "Losers Duo." Key part being: there was the awareness that this was simply in good fun. And I enjoyed being included.

Getting to know the creators of The Night, Red Rover, Life Mission, Blood Bath, and SLAU was and still is an amazing experience. The amount of crossover art we've made is evident of how much I've loved its turnout. I'm still planning on making more crossover work in the future.

It was some of the most actual fun I've had in fandom since I was 12. I'm 20 by the end of the year.

TL;DR

Respect the boundaries of fanwork creators and don't be an asshole for fuck's sake.

#tmnt au polls #tmnt au poll psa #regular buwan blog #//long post #rant #buwan is ranting #also this isn't about the recent preliminary poll #all the polls I've been in have been fun experiences so far #i hope that doesn't change

[imflyingfish]

Finally finished this massive piece with my OCs! this took so much time. Reblogs appreciated

Tag yourself with which middle schooler you were. I was definetly a Pillow lmao

OC info below cut!

Okay so these characters are p much my only OCs. they're a gang of kids (Aged 12-16) who are caught in a zombie apocalypse. Since most of their families have been lost, they decided to reject their old lives and replace their identities with their chosen objects that they use in battle. They call themselves the Knick Knacks. These characters don't have set genders, so pronouns will be thrown around wherever in description.

Backpack - The emo of the group. Backpack's bag acts as a shield, heavy weapon and storage making them the tank. Recently discovered Hatsune Miku. Can be prone to getting down in the dumps (Who wouldn't) but still cares a lot about her friends. Is best friends with Pillow, and the two balance eachother out well. Likes edgy humour and so gets on well with Metrestick

Pillow - The pastel weeb of the group. Watches a lot of anime and DEFINETLY wishes she was a catgirl. The majority of her efforts go to healing her friends using her pillow, which does low damage. She's very emotional and quite high-strung but overall wellmeaning, even if she can come off blunt or jarring. They definetly try their hardest to reduce conflict in the group and promotes unity (or the power of friendship), which can sometimes be too much. She definetly will no longer be a girl in a couple of years. Is the best friend of Backpack and the two balance eachother. Looks up greatly to Megaphone for her ability to support a group and her genius.

Jacket - the shy roadman. Jacket is a bit of a weird character. He wears a large puffer jacket in order to look larger and more imposing, wants to be seen as a roadman, but is overall too quiet and non-threatening for it to work. so they look homeless instead (they all do, its the apocalypse). He has a close connection with animals, and will stuff birds into his jacket to release as one large, powerful attack. They then have to gather the birds again. He was bullied before the apocalypse by classmates (somewhat including Metrestick) which is why he has tried to look more imposing in recent times. Gets on well with Watergun and especially Backpack as they can relate to her more quiet presence. Metrestick has made an effort to get on with Jacket now that there's no longer the pressure of peers around to impress, feeling remorse. The two still clash occasionally, but for the most part work together very well.

Watergun - the sporty "bully". Watergun deals ranged attacks. Metrestick replaced the container of the watergun with carbonated drinks bottles for more power, held together with tape. She can be harsh and hot-headed, but usually means well and can often act as a team motivator. Occasionally though, he can give in to pride and often takes control of the group even if the others disagree with them. He's strong and has a love for sports that he will passinately share with anyone, knowing a great amount of trivia (Sometimes to the annoyance of others) They like to hang out with Megaphone, Jacket, and Metrestick, but is a good friend to the rest of the group.

Metrestick - The hot-headed art kid - Metrestick was in DT (Design and technology) class when the apocalypse started, and grabbed the metrestick on the wall. His specialty is in close range fighting, giving out quick attacks. Despite being generally uninterested in school, she did have an affinity towards design and technology, finding it a good creative outlet for her emotions. Now she shares that outlet with fighting. In school he was also a bully, picking on random kids such as Jacket to impress classmates. Nowadays he instead destroys zombies in combat in order to impress and support his group. Enjoys crude humour, much tto Pillow's dismay. Despite his differences to Pillow, he still gets on well with her and they will often hang out. He enjoys showing his softer side by making gifts for his friends of fixing machinary, such as the wires on Megaphone's wheelchair. Although he generally tries to keep being sappy to a minimum in order to preerve his image. Is prone to fits of anger in which he can be a right dick (But who wouldnt in the apocalypse) Is likely to be an engineer in the future, and may also be a girl in a couple of years idk.

Megaphone - The preppy genius - Megaphone's disability means that she is unable to partake in combat due to difficulties in moving around cluttered battlefields and a general lack of strength. Instead, she has a megaphone that she uses to direct the group, playing support. Her compliments and strategies power up the Knick Knacks and her insults and taunts weaken the opponent. Megaphone is the group strategist, and is usually trusted to make the correct decisions in battle. She's also the oldest, which makes her the defacto leader anyway. She does often get frustrated and has to pass leadership onto someone else, and her disability does mean that she occasionally has to miss battle. She's confident in her intellect, (which can sometimes lead to conflict as she assumes that shes correct, especially with Watergun) but her age makes her more mature than the others meaning that she's trying to work on this. She has an interest in fashion and reality tv, and will often watch anime with Pillow when they manage to find a way to. She also loves chaos, and finds the thrill of battle to be one of her greatest passions. Her love of chaos also means that she loves watching petty drama. She gets on best with Metrestick and Pillow but makes constant efforts to be friends with all of the gang, knowing how pivotal it is in battle.

#imfish #art #original character #ocs #spotlight #illustration #drawing #digital painting #guys im going to need ur help on this one for any reach lmao #anyway yeah welcome to the Knick Knacks #these characters have been super fun to work on #also yeah i didnt say it in the descriptions but most of them are also neurodivergent but i wont say who and how #fun fact Backpack and Jacket are meant to be blue and purple! but i had to change it lol #but no lemme know what u all think yeah

[donnabenevientosimpingzone]

Complex feelings and absolute pandemonium about my mental health aside- going back to reread and look at old posts to relive memories (mostly the very bad cuz I was not a good person when I was in the fandom and am beyond embarrassed about it-) has been an absolute disaster of a healing journey.

May be redrawing some old sketches as a checkpoint of that, so comic updates are going to slow.

I ask that everyone remain polite to my wishes and not tag anyone who you see my art addressing. For example if a draw or redraw fanart from a fanfic, do not reblog tagging the author.

Most certainly I am not remembered fondly by those people, and that’s okay.

In my answer to the Donna headcannons ask, I included one very specific relationship headcannon. It’s not a coincidence- that was me. Back when I was part of this fandom during its peak- I was that lil toxic jerk that ruined shit for other people. I have no excuses for this- young and dumb, pretherapy, unknowingly, flat out being stupid- it doesn’t excuse my actions. As much as I wanted to be a good person- I was not- I did good things- but at my core I was rotting. I still am tending to parts of it.

People are going to remember me as that lil toxic jerk. That’s why I hope ya’ll respect my wishes as I redraw old stuff. Everyone deserves to enjoy their passions without someone, something- a memory- ruining it (again) for them.

I’m sharing these redraws because there’s a story here I hope people take inspiration from. Whether the story is about forgiving others for their past mistakes, learning that you’re not alone, or embracing your embarrassments- that’s different for every person. If that story is lost on people, I have every right to delete it all.

And as for that headcannon, Donna has and always will be the person who trekked beside me through this hellscape that is my mind. As I’ve written stories and drawn more where she gets that happy ending, I see a road for myself- as corny as that could have possibly sounded. There are weights I carry that I must learn to let go- memories of people who have come into my life for a season and changed me forever that probably even despise me now- and one of them is going to be Donna eventually.

Eventually.

For now she’s still very much on the forefront of my mind lmao.

Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk<3

And for you, you know who you are- the one who was the largest victim of my toxic foolery and had the unfortunate responsibility where I crashed upon you from tumblr dms and just wouldn’t leave you the fuck alone because of your work- if you’re by any slim possible fucking chance you’re reading this: thank you for moving on. It sounds so silly, but abandoning me was the right choice, despite all my abandonment issues. I cannot ask for forgiveness after the manipulative bullshit I did to you- the best that I can ask is that your best is an even better person then before for those that’ll have the blessing to be let into your life. Which, from what I’ve read on the latest update to said work, I am reassured you have.

#donna beneviento #shitpost

[loopscereal]

You said to send you screenshots to redraw, so... Maybe one of these two? Personally my favorite of your redesigns have been for Owynn's gang and the twins (and Deuz but I didn't like any particular screenshot for him).

It's also okay if you don't want to, no pressure fjrvdjdvdjevakavqj

a month + 1 day late but HAHAHAH REDRAWWW

okiii sorry this took a goddamn month and sorry for no shading but i AM doing this for funa nd for free but i never forgot , i never forgot multi i promise, i even let my brogram record a timelapse thingy if you want it. 1) yes u redesigned town from the last time i drews him what about it??? (i also redesigned eak but i never did a digital drawing of his previous default ass ) anyways i was itching to make them both more. more ours i guess? Towns black now cause i want to and also lions are african animals and thats enough to convince me lmao. idk its fun, sue me. we dont uhhhh we dont suuuuper tie where the animal is from tot heir race, but sometimes we do and it works out nicely uhhh

2) multi, or anyone seeing this ig, if ya want zoom'in just tell me and ill reblog this with zoom ins n shit. yeah. 3) I REALIZED I FORGOT TOWNS FUCKING FRECKLES. iiii im iffy on adding freckles to him, they did look cute but im worried itll make his face too busy. eaks face is so busy and i do not need another. also busy-ness is why i didnt doshadeing. i tried, i really did try to ger some quick flat shading in, but it looked too busy and just a mess i couldnt do it kjerhblol lmao. 4)uhhhh feel free to ask questions ig. IF ANYONE ELSE ANTS TO REQUEST REDRAW REQUESTS FEEL SO FREE I LOVE DOING REDRAWS. also im totally gonna do the pup and chica one too dont you even worry about it

anyways tysm for the ask and request :) have a good dayyyy love ya fnafhsblr lmao

#fnafhs #fnafhs eak #fnafhs cami #fnafhs town #fhs cami #fhs town #fhs eak #fhs #does this count as a holidays gift..? #feliz navidad ig ig ig #ask #fnafhs fanart #fhs z3ro #fhs z3r0 #fnafhs z3r0 #fnafhs zero #fhs zero #uhhhhhhhhhhh #idk dawg #our au #cami #eak #town

[airbendertendou]

s/o w a non-sexual oral fixation ♥︎ [including mikey, draken, yuzuha & senju]

if you have a blank blog [no bio, no user, no header or profile pic, nothing reblogged, etc] do not interact with my content. you will be blocked.

MIKEY ♥︎ tbh i can see him being the same ♥︎ he always needs something sweet in his mouth if he isnt talking ♥︎ has gotten into the habit of bringing your favorite candy with him everywhere! ♥︎ if you’re like me n chew on things you shouldnt [cuticles n lip skin] he notices n yanks your hand away from your mouth to put a piece of candy in there  ♥︎ has mitsuya n draken carry your fave candies too! ♥︎ no one in toman allows anyone to say anything mean to you abt your habits <3 [baji has put someone in the hospital before when they called you a baby for sucking on a lollipop ♥︎]

DRAKEN ♥︎ has literally dealt w this before bc of mikey lmao ♥︎ always holding your hand so you cant mindlessly chew on it!  ♥︎ someone once made a lil sexual ““joke”“ abt your habit n they were on the ground before you could even blink ♥︎ you literally were jus saring down at them w this giant seething half-bald guy behind you menacingly  ♥︎ knows to keep your mouth busy when you’re bored or not talking ♥︎ has helped you out so much ):  ♥︎ i also grind my teeth all the time so i can see him like squeezing your cheeks until you stop or else your jaw will b sore

YAZUHA ♥︎ challenges you to eat spicy food w her stinky older brother ♥︎ you win bc taiju sucks <3 n you get a kiss on the cheek from her so win, win! ♥︎ has bought you so many different brands / flavors of lip balm to stop your teeth from ruining your lips  ♥︎ tries new lollipop flavors before giving them to you bc her fave must b the one you like more ♥︎ also paints your nails if you bite them! nail polish does not taste nice, youve discovered ♥︎ made hakkai start carrying around some lil treats for you when you come around n she isnt home <3

SENJU ♥︎ makes you drink ice cold water before shoving mint gum in your mouth ):< ♥︎ says its to stop you from self destructive chewing but tbh jus wanted to laugh at you! ♥︎ also chews on candy when her mind is elsewhere ♥︎ gave you personal permission to steal wakasa’s lollipops <3 [he buys you both your own bag off-handedly but you can see him watching you fondly ):] ♥︎ takeomi now has to watch after the two of you n hes got such a headache lmao ♥︎ has choked on a piece of gum mid-fight before so she makes sure you always spit it out n take precautions 

i know this wasnt properly written out but i hope its okay! i also took an oral stimming route on this lmao thank you for your request ♥︎ 

airbendertendou © do not copy, plagiarize, repost, or translate my content on any platform. if you see my content under any other name than my own, let me know. i only have this tumblr and an ao3 account under the same name.

#sano mikey x reader #sano manjiro imagines #sano manjiro x reader #draken x reader #draken ryuguji imagines #yazuha x reader #yazuha imagines #senju kawaragi x reader #senju kawaragi imagine #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers imagines #tokyo revengers scenarios

[spoops-screams]

| MC who can cook but acts a complete wreak in the kitchen

Character(s): Diasomnia

TW: Food

Notes: Gender neutral MC || I mentioned that I was gonna write this ages ago and here it finally is! It's honestly basically just a summary of me in the kitchen lmao || It's the middle of August and I'm going to click a random date and time and queue this to pretend that I have some vague semblance of motivation or something or other so have fun whenever you read this <3

They are all absolutely elated when you come over to the dorm with the exception of Sebek who has a couple words to say to you but even he starts to enjoy having you around when you offer to cook as a thank you for them having you over

Almost anything beat Lilia's cooking and your offer gave them an easy ticket to get out of having to eat his disasters

Their trust in you goes up by a bit when you decline anyone who asks if you'd like their help. Hopefully that means to them that you know your way well enough around the kitchen that you don't want anyone else messing up your area

Aaaaand all of that trust flies right out of the window the moment that the resident fae hear you mumbling in the kitchen about having no idea what anything is

"Hell is this?" followed by the sound of you smelling it and then announcing, without a single care for the state of the food "Screw it, in it goes. Uuuuuh... How much should I put? Lemme taste... Ah yes... tastes like powder. Yeah, no idea."

At least Lilia makes an effort to sound like he knows what he's doing because he really does think that he's okay at least in the kitchen. You, however, sound like you are actively attempting to kill them. Unintentionally but it's all the same when they hear you do this a couple more times

You're mumbling to yourself all the while and eventually they send Malleus in to check on you rather than Sebek who seems about ready to drag you out of the kitchen by your feet to check on you

It looks a complete wreck when he walks in with everything strewn everywhere though there's a surprising lack of spillages of any ingredients and you're in the process of cleaning up

He's mildly terrified when you say that you're cleaning up while the food cooks over the fire since you have about half an hour

They're all getting mentally, emotionally and physically prepared to have to stomach something equally as bad as Lilia's cooking at the time that you give and the fact that the fire is on its highest heat while you're sitting with them after cleaning without a care in the world until you remember the food is on the fire and sprint to the kitchen with an "oh shit-"

They're too polite to leave and too polite to cook something in place of what you've just spent so much time cooking so they're fully prepared to sit and endure it even if Sebek is ready to burst your ear drums the moment that he finds anything wrong with what he assumes is your wreck of a meal

They - minus Lilia - don't think they've ever felt so relieved to see normal looking food. They're genuinely so surprised that you haven't just brought out a lump of ash on a tray not to mention the smell

The relief might just make them ascend along side the realisation that it tastes amazing as well

Whether or not they let you cook again, however, fully depends on how capable they are of sitting though a couple more almost heart attacks while hearing you cook before they get used to it and realise that that's just how you cook

Do not repost or claim. Only reblog 💕

#twst #twst wonderland #twisted wonderland #twst malleus #malleus draconia #twisted wonderland malleus #twst headcanons #twisted wonderland headcanon #twst diasomnia #diasomnia #twst sebek #sebek zigvolt #twst silver #lilia vanrouge #twst lilia #diasomnia headcanon #twst hcs

[darkhangels]

17. happy new year

enjoy the silence masterlist

morpheus x f!reader

A/N:  Double update for today! Second chapter is shorter than usual...you'll see why ;). Just wanted to let you guys know that if updates are slowing down its because I'm writing way more words in a chapter than I used to and also I'm at a stage where I'm very insecure about my writing atm. Don't worry, I'm still always writing for this fic, just be gentle with me lmao. Also December is a very busy month for me so it may slow down due to that as well. Anyways, as always thank you so much for reading and for the likes, reblogs and comments, you all mean the world to me <3

words: 7598

warnings: brief injury description, swearing, angst

Morpheus stood as still as ever outside of the now destroyed coffee shop that you had worked at. Firefighters and numerous policemen way out of their league swarmed the ruins as they taped up the destruction, not allowing the crowd of reporters and concerned citizens to go any further.

The ground had cracked open rather violently, making sure the building would never see the light of day again.

He watched mortals run around unknowing what to do in light of the strange event. This would make international news, conspiracy theorists already piling up with insane hoaxes about the event.

His Jaw was tightened as he stood rigid, his hands inside his pockets.

It was clearly no accident.

The universe had a way of working and this was one of them. The universe was punishing you by taking away your work, your livelihood and hurting your friend.

It was a threat, a promise of what to come if the two of you continued to be with one another.

Despite it all, a part of him was relieved. Relieved that this was the warning, and that no physical harm had come to you.

But it served as a painful reminder for the both of you.

He felt a familiar presence walk beside him, he didn’t bother looking up at her as she stood beside him, watching the ruin.

“Was anyone killed?” He muttered out.

Death turned to her brother with a sad smile haunting her lips. “No, her friend will be okay”

Morpheus nodded, his gaze still on the scene in front of him.

“This wasn’t an accident” She said while studying him. “Though you knew that already, didn’t you”

Morpheus turned to peer at her, her kind eyes boring into him. “You knew the rules” She shrugged.

Morpheus slowly looked down at the floor, swallowing harshly. “I’ve been foolish”

Death had that effect on him. He was always so unwilling to speak his mind, ever the private anthropomorphic personification he was but around his elder sister? Much to his annoyance she always saw straight through him.

Death scoffed. “You think? Did you even consider the danger you’d be putting her in?”

He scowled at her but he knew she was only telling the truth. “I did,” He muttered.

“Evidently not enough” Death scolded her brother before sighing at his miserable figure. “You can be incredibly selfish at times, you know that?”

Morpheus glared at her his gaze hardening as he opened his lips to argue. “Selfish?” He argued. “I tried to keep her at bay despite my affections”

Death scoffed again, a look of disbelief searing onto her face. “Are you listening to yourself? You ‘tried’ ” She air quoted the word as she shook her head. “You are one of the most powerful beings in existence, if you had truly tried this wouldn’t of happened”

Morpheus scowled at his sister, his eyebrows brooding over his eyes but he knew she was right, he had been selfish. Ultimately he had put you in danger simply because of the feelings he felt for you.

And though you weren’t physically hurt, your friend had been harmed and Morpheus knew you would not shake that off so easily.

In one way or another he had hurt you. Again.

And Morpheus cursed himself. How many more times was he going to cause the ones he loved suffering because of his selfishness?

Death studied her brother slowly, sensing the emotional turmoil. “What were you thinking, Morpheus?” She said softer this time.

He remained silent but Death knew his answer, he didn’t think. He cared far too much to think.

Death smirked. “Always was the hopeless romantic of the family”

Morpheus looked down, ignoring her statements.

Death's smile faded as she watched Morpheus’ sombre expression. “The universe is being kind” She spoke quietly.

His eyes snatched up to hers. “Kind?” He repeated angrily.

“Yes, kind,” Death affirmed. “It could’ve just taken her away from you instead its giving you a warning, a chance to keep her safe”

Morpheus’ expression melted into a contemplative one. He supposed his sister was right. But the universe was far from kind. If the universe was so kind it wouldn’t have let the two of you have ever crossed paths knowing what would become of it.

Death studied Morpheus’ expression. “Do you love her?” She asked gently.

Morpheus looked up at her, eyes burning with unshed tears, unspoken words lingering.

More than she knows. He silently answered in his head, just to himself. More than I am willing to admit to even myself.

He swallowed harshly and Death could read her brother like an open book, her heart melting at the sight of his melancholy. Death sadly smiled, placing a hand on her brother's shoulder. “Then you have to let her go, or next time the universe won’t be so kind”

Morpheus nodded slowly, his Adam apple bobbing up and down so slightly. He knew what he had to do.

Death pulled her brother into a hug. For once Morpheus greatly welcomed the feeling of comfort from his elder sister and he was overcome with a great sense of gratitude for her, she always said what he needed to hear.

The two pulled away and Death's face fell into one of shock before a slight grave smile landed on her lips, peering gently at Morpheus. “She must’ve really pulled a number on you, you nearly hugged me back for once”

Morpheus allowed his lip to twitch up at that before he watched his sister walk away with a wave goodbye. Leaving him to brew in his thoughts and prepare himself for what must be done.

He was an endless.

He was not meant for love.

He was meant to fulfil his function, nothing more.

Except he was realising it all too late.

----------------

When you arrived at the hospital you swiftly spoke to the nurse over the counter who told you she would be notifying Veronica that you had arrived. With a nod you drifted to the waiting room.

No one likes hospitals. They were claustrophobic and anxiety inducing. Except for perhaps birth there was almost no happy reason for being there. The stretching winding corridors and harsh lights cause you to nervously bite at your lips, fearing the worst.

Your eyes drifted around to the people around you, elderly and young alike sitting miserably in the dull grey seats, some had red rimmed eyes and held on to tissues they nervously pulled apart in between their nimble fingers. Maybe they had lost a loved one or were going to, maybe it was the dreadful reminder of morality and the fragileness of life that haunted the walls of the hospital getting to them. It was surely getting to you after all.

Life was so short, a fleeting blink of an eye, you had already wasted so much of it, how could you waste anymore? And suddenly all your insecurities from the night before with Morpheus dwindled into a past memory, a childish notion. He loved you. And you see it now. Of course he had, in every moment you felt his love and yet your inability to see it caused this.

You had practically forced him to say the words, if he hadn’t, maybe this wouldn’t have happened. More guilt crashed into you then.

How childish you had been? Crying over problems your mind created for you when everything you had ever wanted was right in front of you.

And now it would be ripped away.

You needed to apologise to Morpheus.

If you ever saw him again that was.

You drew your attention to the tiny TV playing a live news report from outside what was the coffee shop. And your heart sank.

It was completely gone, melted into nothing more than a pile of stone and dust on the street. You bit back the tears as you watched the police officers and firefighters helplessly scratch their head at the mess, not knowing what to do.

Your tiny little coffee shop had made international news, headlines everywhere on the ‘strange new years eve earthquake taking down beloved café’. You supposed you were unemployed now. How long had you worked there for, how many shifts with Lorna spent giggling over the stupidest things.

All gone.

Because of you.

You felt a hand on your shoulder causing you to jump out of your thoughts and you swiftly turned to find Veronica behind you. Almost instantly she threw you into a hug and you reciprocated, holding her tightly.

She pulled away and you noticed her red rimmed eyes, not used to seeing her so flat and dejected. You swallowed harshly, trying to find your voice.

“How is she?” You whispered.

Veronica bit on her lip and nodded. “She’s awake and she’ll be fine, she has a broken leg but she’ll be fine”

You breathed a long sigh of relief.

Veronica shook her head furiously. “She was the only one hurt, everyone else managed to escape without so much of a scratch on them, it was just her” Her voice was just above a whisper.

More guilt crept up your throat and you chewed at your lip before placing a hand on Veronica's shoulder. “She will be fine, you can rest, get something to eat or drink” You softly smiled at your friend. “I will stay with her while you go freshen up”

Veronica nodded with a sincere look of gratitude on her face, a few tears spilling out of her eyes. “Thank you”

You considered her, giving her another smile before pulling her into another hug.

God knew she needed it.

If something had happened to Morpheus you would’ve been-.

You pushed the thoughts out of your head, unwilling to think about him. The pain too much to bear.

A kind nurse led you to the room Lorna was currently staying in. Your heart instantly jumped at the sight of your friend in the cold, surgical hospital room. Her skin felt paler than usual, as bruises scattered her body. Your eyes followed her body down to the end of the bed, her leg was propped up on in a bulky cast that she was no doubt going to complain about for weeks to come.

Lorna's eyes snapped up to yours and a bright grin grew on her face.

You practically ran to her and engulfed her in a gentle but warm embrace. She giggled against you as a few tears left your eyes.

“I knew you loved me really” She dramatically cried and you laughed as a few more tears left your eyes and you pulled away from her.

“Are you okay?”

It was a stupid question really, she had had a building crash down on her and ended with a broken leg. Of course she wasn’t okay.

“Me?” Lorna scoffed. “I’ll be fine, the only thing that is hurt is my leg and my ego” She chuckled.

In the hospital and she was still cracking jokes, typical Lorna.

You weakly smiled as you turned your gaze to her arms littered in bruises and cuts, you sucked in a breath, eyes ripping away from her injuries, unable to take it. “Lorns, I’m so sorry” You whispered, biting back the tears.

Her eyebrows furrowed. “Why? Not your fault we had an earthquake” She laughed.

You smiled weakly but bit on your tongue as you grabbed her hand, warmly squeezing it.

This was your fault though.

All of it.

You had been willing to risk your life for Morpheus, willing to ruin yourself. It hadn’t even crossed your mind that the universe would try and take the one other thing you truly unconditionally loved away from you.

And you couldn’t risk that.

You couldn’t risk losing Lorna.

She was already hurt because of you. Probably fucking traumatised as well.

More tears fell.

You knew what you had to do and, god, was it going to destroy you.

“Jesus, are you okay?” Lorna said slightly more seriously watching your expression.

“Why are you asking me? You’re the one in the hospital bed” You huffed, a few more tears escaping your eyes, guilt paralysing you.

Lorna studied you for a second as you clutched onto her hand.

Your eyes snatched up to hers. “I thought I lost you, Lorns”

Lorna smiled sadly at your words.

“I don’t know what I would’ve done without you” You admitted.

And it’s true. The only constant you have had through practically your entire life was Lorna. Taking her away would’ve been like stripping a part of yourself away. She made you smile in times you found the hardest, when you could feel yourself drowning under the pressure of the weight of the world she was there to pull you up when no other would, when no other could. She had seen the best and the worst of you and she still stayed by your side. A world without her would be mundane and not worth living.

“But I’m fine” Lorna whispered, placing her other hand on your hand, clutching you in a warm embrace. “I’ll be fine”

You nodded slowly though the lump in your throat did not disappear. “Did they say when they’re letting you out?”

“Well, they want to keep me here overnight just for tonight, something about my lungs and breathing-” She parted her chapped lips trying to think back. “I don’t know I wasn’t really listening but they just want to check for tonight and then tomorrow I’ll be a free woman”

You nodded quietly.

“Guess I won’t be going to any New Years Eve parties though” She snorted. “You’ll have to go for me”

“Absolutely not” You chuckled. “I don’t think I’ll be going to another party ever again after Halloween”

Lorna's eyes fell from yours then her face melting into a more mournful expression. “I never should have left you at that party”

Your eyebrows furrowed. “What are you talking about?”

Lorna looked back up at you, her eyes full with a kind of sincerity you almost never saw from her. “Me and Veronica, we should’ve stayed with you, made sure you were okay and got you home safely” Lorna winced her eyes shut. “God knows what could’ve happened to you”

Your mouth curved into a small smile as you peered down at your friend. “But nothing did happen, that was ages ago and I’m fine”

“Still” She shrugged. “I’m sorry”

More guilt crashed over you. If she knew you were the reason why she was in hospital she wouldn’t be apologising. Surely not, she would’ve casted you out in seconds, promising to never speak to you again and wishing you were the one bruised and battered in the hospital bed instead.

Except she wouldn’t.

Lorna would never.

And that's what made it so much worse.

You gave her another weak smile. “You don’t need to apologise, but I forgive you nonetheless”

Lorna gave you a grateful smile before it curved into a smirk. “Not exactly the best New years then?”

You shrugged, a playful smile on your face. “I don’t know, maybe we’ll get Veronica to sneak you in some champagne”

“Please” Lorna sighed. “I could do with a drink, had a building fall on me and now being unemployed”

You flinched slightly at her words, the lump in your throat only growing. “We’re gonna have to find real jobs now I guess, like actual adults”

Lorna grinned at you. “Like what?”

“Well,” You said contemplatively. “A lawyer, a doctor. I don’t know, something that pays incredibly well”

Lorna nodded before cheekily smirking at you. “I’ve already been offered a job”

“How?” You huffed. “You were unconscious until like twenty minutes ago”

A great big smile landed on her face then. “The company where Veronica works, they need a secretary,” She looked down then smiling softly at the thought of her girlfriend. “She said that after this she’s never letting me out of her sight again so she’s practically begging me to take this job”

You beamed at your friends happiness. “And will you take the job?”

Lorna considered you for a second with a look of disbelief on her face. “I think I might”

You chuckled. “Of course you will, you two are truly going to be connected by the hip now”

Lorna smiled to herself before turning to you. “What about you? What will you do?”

You stared at her like a deer caught in headlights. It was a question that had plagued you for a while now. What would you do after the coffee shop? You had always thought that a job would just pop up, or you would suddenly find something interesting and leave to pursue it. You thought that when the time was right you’d leave by your own accords, when you were ready. Not literally forced into unemployment.

“I don’t know” You smiled weakly, telling the truth.

Lorna sensed your apprehension and nodded slowly. “Something will come along, it always does, you’ll be fine”

You smirked at your friend. “I know I will”

The door to the room opened and Veronica came walking in greeting the both of you, she looked slightly better, slightly less panicked, more like herself.

She crept over the other side of the bed, peering down at Lorna like she was her whole world. She started stroking Lorna’s hair out of her face so delicately like she was scared to hurt her. “They said I can stay the night with you, so you won’t be alone,” Veronica smiled.

“You don’t have to do that, Ronnie,” Lorna said, staring up at her.

“Nonsense” Veronica waved it off. “Besides I won’t be able to sleep unless I’m beside you knowing you’re alright” She admitted.

Lorna took Veronica's hand and kissed it gently, peering up at her.

A soft smile appeared on your face. It was more than comforting to know that no matter what happened Lorna would always have Veronica. And Veronica would always have Lorna.

You cursed yourself as your mind flicked back to Morpheus.

You were going to have to say goodbye to him today.

Your lip trembled at the thought.

Both Lorna and Veronica threw their gaze behind you. And you felt the familiar pricking sensation at the back of your neck as nausea crept up your throat, your legs turning to nothing but jelly.

Speak of the devil.

You knew who was behind you and you knew what he had come to say.

But you didn’t turn around, you wanted to put this off for as long as possible.

Lorna smirked at you. “I think your boyfriends here”

You nodded and bit your lip, your palms feeling sweaty as you shakily stood up. “I’m gonna take a walk but I’ll be back you guys” You smiled weakly at them.

Veronica smiled. “Of course, take as much time as you want”

Swallowing another harsh lump you slowly turned around and met his eyes on the other side of the window. There he stood in the hospital corridor, the dark brooding figure, with a look just as grave as yours staring back at you.

Your eyebrows scrunched up as you fought back the tears. His head jerked to the side, gesturing you to follow him and you slowly, oh so slowly walked to the doors.

When you faced him, you saw the unshed tears in his eyes and your face blanched, mouth having gone dry.

You were not ready. You had only just admitted your love. Did the universe truly leave no time for the two of you to even try and exist?

You followed him into one of the empty hospital rooms, the sterile atmosphere only adding to the dread seeping through your body.

The doors closed with a thud and you flinched ever so slightly as the creeping silence drifted over the two of you, both unwilling and unwanting to speak.

You simply peered at him taking in all his features as you knew this would be the last time. You peered into those starlit eyes that dissolved into a blue so brilliant you might’ve passed out. His messy hair falling onto his forehead ever so slightly as his jaw hardened, the gentle yet harsh curve of his nose. His figure, tall and rigid.

Morpheus knew that you were going to say the exact same thing as he. He could see it in the way your breathing trembled through you, in the way you were desperately clinging onto those tears.

“I, um” You stuttered, your voice no more than a mere whisper. “You know what I’m going to say, don’t you?”

“I do” He quietly responded. “It is the same reason I am here”

You nodded, biting on your lip. How were you supposed to do this?

The only person you had ever loved, and you had to say goodbye.

For forever.

“I am willing to put myself at risk, I do not care what happens to me” You started, deciding to just tell him the utter truth. “But I could never risk her” Your lip trembled. He knew who ‘her’ was.

Morpheus strode closer. “And I would never ask you to, Nor would I allow you to put yourself at risk”

You nodded at his words, swallowing the lump. Both of you grew quiet and you realised this would be the last time you spoke to him, and you would not let unsaid words haunt you for the rest of your life.

“Morpheus, I want to apologise” You announced, stepping closer to him.

His eyebrows furrowed.

“Looking back now, I see it, all the times we shared with one another, all the gifts, every word” You looked up at him rather shyly. “Every touch, all of it. You were telling me all along and yet I was so blinded by my insecurities that like a child, I didn’t hear it”

Morpheus’ lips parted as an unreadable expression grew on his face. You stepped even closer. “And I know I apologised last night, but it’s not enough. Because I was too late”

One hot wet steaming tear fell out of your eye and you rather quickly swiped it away. “Maybe if I had noticed it sooner, if I hadn't have forced you to say the words, this wouldn’t have happened” You shook your head, angered by yourself. “I was so caught up in my own selfish needs I didn’t see what was right in front of me”

You went to fiddle with your finger anxiously as you always did but thought better of yourself, not wanting to shy away from this moment. “And in doing so, I caused all this,” You threw your hands around gesturing to the hospital room. “This is my doing because I didn’t see it”

“And I want you to know that its my fault for not seeing it, not yours” You bit your lip. "And I need you to know that”

You stepped further, peering up into his soft gaze. “Because Morpheus, despite what I know you believe you are simply the most caring and passionate lover”

His eyes flashed with something, as he was rendered silent.

“Like you said, you didn’t have to say the words. It was there in your actions, your gifts, your touch” You peered up at him. “It was everywhere, and you made me feel so cared for, and though I didn’t recognise it you made me feel so loved”

“And you were so good to me” You whispered, and you realised he needed to hear this, the being who had been touch starved for so long, who shied away from others embrace, he needed to hear this. “You are Dream of the Endless and you deserve to love and to be loved”

His eyebrows scrunched up as your kind words hit him like bricks.

Your eyes flickered down to the floor, a few tears delicately escaping down your cheeks. “And I wish it was me, I wish it could be me to fulfil that for you”

Morpheus’ eyes started to burn as he felt his throat start to restrict.

“But I can’t, Morpheus, I am ‘just a mortal’ and I see that now” A sad accepting smile plastered on your face.

“You are ‘just a mortal’, aren’t you?” His lip twitched up into a humourless smirk as he talked slowly. “I see it now”

You were unsure where all this new sense of understanding was coming from, when only last night you were crying at those very words. Maybe it was Lorna's brush with death reminding you of your mortality? Making you look through the lens in a different perspective.

In a matter of hours you had grown up like never before.

“And though I doubt I’ll ever love like this again”

You doubted you’d ever even love again, a part of you most likely always waiting for him to come back to you.

But you wouldn’t tell him that, he didn’t need that burden.

He was immortal, more than that.

Soon you will become a hazy memory, all the time you spent together will be no more than a mere blink of an eye for him. He would love again.

And he would forget you.

More tears fell and the words became harder to say.

“We can’t” You trembled. “We just can’t”

Morpheus was silent for a long time. Taking in your words, he had never felt quite so…understood.

Yes that was the word, he had lived for years beyond human comprehension and met almost every being in existence and yet he finally felt understood.

He felt loved.

So loved.

It was a very alien feeling to him. No one had ever said the exact words he needed to hear, like his soul was open and calling to you, telling you everything he needed to hear.

You understood him better than perhaps anyone had, and now he had to let you go.

Morpheus stepped forward.

“You did not force me to say it” He said softly. “I said it because I needed you to know and I needed to say it, to admit it to even myself”

You smiled gently at his words though the tears didn’t stop.

The two of you stood so close together, taking in one another's presence for the last time. You had to crane your head slightly to peer into his eyes.

“I have never…” The sentence trailed off, he was unable to speak the words. He bit down on his tongue harshly, eyes falling to the floor. “No matter now” He muttered.

“You’re not to blame, the universe would’ve punished us regardless if we had said the words” He affirmed.

You nodded sadly, letting the tears fall.

“Thank you, Morpheus” You whispered “Despite it all I don’t regret ever meeting you”

Morpheus’ eyes became glossy and he swallowed harshly.

“No matter what I have said, I don’t regret a single second of the time we ever shared” You breathed.

He nodded. “As I with you”

His gaze wandered down to your neck. Slowly he grazed his fingertips over the necklace he had gifted you. “For your safety, I will no longer hear should you use the necklace to call me”

You bit back the sob and nodded in understanding.

Morpheus peered down at you, his soft eyes searching your face as he considered all the words he wanted to say. He grabbed both of your hands and intertwined them with his. You shuddered under his touch but it was more than welcome.

“I want you to live your life how you wish” Morpheus' voice lulled in your ear. “To explore the wonders humanity has to offer, I want you to love again”

The words tasted so bitter on his tongue, the thought of you beside anyone else other than him making him nauseous but he rose above it. All he wanted was to see you shine the way you did for him, even if he wasn’t around to see it.

You winced your eyes shut at his words, the pain becoming too much as more tears fell.

“I just have one request,” He said.

You peeled your eyes open and watched his pale blue eyes bore into you. “Stay out of harm's way”

Your eyebrows furrowed for a second as you looked up at him.

His gaze hardened as his eyes glistened under the harsh hospital room lights. “I do not know what I would do if something were to happen to you” He admitted, his voice dangerously quiet.

Your heart melted and a slight sob escaped your lips.

“I want you to swear it” He declared, eyes full with something. “Please”

You bit your lip. “I swear it”

“Will you tell Lucienne and Matthew that I said goodbye and that their friendship has meant more to me then they know” Your lip trembled at the thought of your friends you were never able to say goodbye to.

“Of course,” He answered, the ghost of a smile on his face. “I fear that though Lucienne will never admit it they have both become quite attached to you”

You huffed a laugh as a few tears fell.

Morpheus stared down at you, seriousness back in his tone. “Your dreams shall go back to the way mortals were meant to dream, they way they were before the nightmares”

“I understand” A sad smile graced your face. “Thank you, Dream King, for ever helping me in the first place”

He nodded. “You are quite welcome, little one”

You blushed at the endearment as silence engulfed the room. Your heart, beating at an insane rate. Mouth dry with dread.

“I must leave” His voice, no more than a mere whisper.

“I know”

Slowly he leant down and brushed his lips against yours. You winced your eyes shut again, tasting him for the last time as you both hungrily clashed against one another, drinking in the last touch. He could taste the salty tears on your lips and wanted nothing more than to kiss away every single tear that had ever fallen from your eyes.

Time moved slowly in the moment but not as slow as you had wanted, as you had needed. Eventually you had both slowly pulled away. Your forehead clashed into his as you both stood still in the white room. Eyes closed, hands intertwined, foreheads resting on top of one anothers.

And you had never known the meaning of bittersweet before this, with his presence a soothing calm had always washed over you and it was nonetheless this time, it just wasn’t enough to dull the heartbreak.

“I love you, Morpheus” You whispered against the tears.

“I know” He spoke in that gravelly tortured tone, it was his own way of saying it, he pushed his forehead further against yours, his raven hair tickling against your skin as he winced his eyes. “Goodbye, My rogue dreamer”

“Goodbye, Dream of the endless”

And then you felt his touch slip through your fingers like sand and could no longer feel his hot breath on your skin, no longer feel his soft silk skin against your forehead

You slowly opened your eyes and he was gone.

The hospital room remained painfully quiet as you stared where he had been in front of you only seconds earlier, his presence echoing around you like a ghost.

A crawling sensation drifted back into your heart, something you hadn’t felt in a long time. It clawed at your throat making your eyes water.

Loneliness.

Your lip trembled again and it hit you like a ton of bricks.

You were never going to see him again. He had exited your life just as quickly as he had entered.

Those midnight eyes, his translucent skin, wild raven hair all just a memory now.

You would never be able to hold him again, never able to touch, hear his voice.

A sob ripped through your throat and you covered your hand with your mouth, trying to muffle the crying.

You loved him so fucking much.

You swallowed the lump in your throat and angrily swiped at the hot tears, there was a time and place.

“Not now” You muttered to yourself.

You would have plenty of time to cry later, but Lorna needed you, so you had to be brave.

Morpheus would want you to be brave.

Straightening yourself up and plastering a pitiful smile on you marched out of the room and went back to Lorna’s room.

---------------

The two of them greeted as you walked back in slowly.

“Where’d he go?” Veronica questioned looking behind you with her forehead creased.

You swallowed the pain. “He had to go,” You said. “He wishes you well though” You added looking back at Lorna who surveyed you with a quizzical look.

“Are yo-”

“So what did I miss?” You grinned, cutting Lorna off, choosing to avoid it at all costs and to just be there for her.

Thankfully she didn’t push as the three of you drifted into mindless light-hearted conversation, all of you needing it.

-----------------

Time dwindled on and the dread to go home to your empty apartment for the rest of the night and eventually face your emotions only multiplied throughout the day.

“Please! Go home, we will be fine” Lorna begged after you had asked, ‘Are you sure?’ For the fiftieth time.

Veronica placed a soothing hand on your shoulder. “Its ok, we are fine, go home and make most of the rest of the night left before the new year”

You smiled weakly at them, momentarily forgetting the night's traditions. “Ok, fine but please keep in touch and if you need anything call me, even if it's in the middle of the night” You stammered.

The two giggled before waving goodbye. Reluctantly you left the hospital, the sensations from before coming back tenfold. More loneliness.

You took a long shaky breath, as you exited the doors. The cold December air hitting you almost knocks your breath out under the gruelling pressure. It was late and in a mere couple of hours the year would have drawn to a final close and the You cast your gaze up into the sky only for the stars to be twinkling above you, a silent hello. The lump in the back of your throat became extremely large and unavoidable. Your eyes glistening under the moonlight.

All you had ever had was the stars.

And now even they reminded you of him.

You ripped your gaze from the sky and stumbled to the nearby bus stop. Arms wrapped around yourself, protecting you from the cold that gripped at your skin.

----------------

Home had never felt quite so uncomforting before. The door slammed shut and you slowly meandered through the halls. Slowly you switched on the lights, finding yourself in the bathroom. Hesitantly you made your way to the sink, gripping with white knuckles before you looked up at your reflection.

You were still wearing his coat and the necklace. Your hand ghosted over the sigil of his helm hanging from the silver chain as your lip trembled.

At least Lorna was safe.

That was the mantra you repeated to yourself.

And it was the mantra you would keep repeating to yourself, no matter how hard it got.

You brought the coat up to your face, testing to see if it had retained some of him.

A rush of sandalwood and fresh air like the winter night hit you, and your eyes watered. After all this time it still remained his scent. Delicately you reluctantly removed the coat from your body, not wanting it to find anymore than it already had.

Morpheus was gone, all traces aside from the gifts completely eradicated. He would no longer be there to seduce you into a deep slumber, you would no longer feel his touch, the skin like soft silk against your touch, his deep yet gentle voice purring in your ear.

Never lightly bantering with Lucienne, Matthew and Merv in the library again. No more stolen glances and feathering kisses. No more stargazing and watching the dreaming.

You would never see his starlit eyes again. Never to see those twitches of his lips again. Never to hear him speak about his countless aeons and aeons of stories.

No more Morpheus.

The lump at the back of your throat only grew and grew but you casted it out. Splashing cold water on your face.

Morpheus wouldn’t have wanted you to be sad.

You drifted to your room, throwing his coat onto your bed as you took your shoes off. Upon your bed laid Matthew 2.0 and your lip trembled again at the thought of Matthew. A soft thudding hitting against the windows drew your attention from the bed, you peered into the dark reflection to see highlighted raindrops softly falling. Your gaze moved to something tucked away in the corner, you furrowed your eyebrows upon realisation.

It was the Christmas present Lorna had gifted you, that you never opened. Setting aside your emotions you grabbed it as you sat upon the bed regarding the box with curiosity. You grabbed the tag on the bright red wrapping paper. It read.

Thought a special someone might enjoy this ;)

Merry Christmas

- Love Lorna

With a creased forehead you tore into the paper to find a rather flat cardboard box, grabbing the lid you opened it, setting it aside the card written for you with Lorna’s handwriting on it before your eyes landed on the gift.

Your mouth hung open in shock. As you slowly lifted the thin material up.

It was a lingerie set.

A lace black lingerie set.

You regarded the material with your mouth parted. It was beautiful, actually. Proper lingerie, not the cheap stuff. Slowly setting it down you picked up the card on top.

Thought you would need something that matched with your boyfriends gothic fashion. You can thank me later.

You let a chuckle escape you then, of course Lorna would have done something like this, what else had you expected? You licked your lips, would Morpheus have liked something like this?

There would of course only have been one way to find out.

Only it was too late now.

You bit back the tears, you were not about to cry over lingerie, tucking the box away under your bed.

The sound of the rain filled the painfully empty apartment as you travelled to the kitchen, deciding it was way more than past dinner time and you needed to eat.

Morpheus would have wanted you to look after yourself.

Switching the TV on so you could listen to the New Year's eve countdown while cooking. And what a year it had been, if you had told January you where you would be now? Well maybe you would have given up right then and there. You opened the fridge and grabbed some vegetables, deciding to throw them in with some pasta. You grabbed a tomato and started slicing it. The sounds of the knife hitting the chopping board echoing against the desolate air.

Your mind cruelly betrayed you as memories of him played in your head.

A new sense of dread collapsed onto you and you clambered to your feet. As your heartbeat echoed in your ears. “Who are you?” You stuttered shielding yourself by crossing your arms over your chest as if they would protect you from whomever was in front of you.

“Who am I?” The deep voice practically purred as he stood up and started descending down the steps. “I am Dream of the Endless and you requested an audience with me, so you shall state your matters at once” He said coldly as his eyes studied you.

The chopping sped up.

You looked back up to Dream noticing his silence, and he looked back into your red rimmed eyes as he slowly and carefully leant down in front of you. You turned away still trying to slow the crying down before you felt the soft brush of Dreams thumb on your cheek drying your tears. Looking back in confusion as his thumb, still on your cheek, swiped over your soft skin ever so slightly, you looked into his eyes. They were soft and all the more piercing, earlier cruelty nowhere to be found.

The proximity between the two of you was still overpowering but yet you had felt the most calm, the most safe you had been in an excruciatingly long time.

You didn’t feel so alone.

You bit your lip, furiously slamming the knife further down into the vegetable.

“Morpheus”

Your forehead creased in confusion.

“Call me Morpheus” He rasped.

Your heart leapt in your chest and you brushed your nose with his. “Morphe-”

You were cut off by Morpheus gently brushing his lips against yours and you instantly melted under the touch. His hand slid around your lower back, pulling you into him. You began to lose yourself in his hold as your hand crept up behind his head, fingers tousling his messy raven hair. Your lips parted slightly against his as his tongue slipped into your mouth and you feverishly whimpered at the all too welcome feeling.

You threw another tomato onto the chopping board, whacking it a ridiculous amount.

The already thick atmosphere tripled by tenfold as the air cracked under the pressure as you held in your breaths. His expression became apprehensive, nervous almost as he looked up at you through his lashes, his face etched in a new kind of vulnerability you had never seen from him before.

“I’ve fallen in love with you”

A tear escaped your eye as your breath hitched, your head suddenly becoming fuzzy. Your gaze softened and you felt a warmth spread through your body.

Your wrist started to ache as the ripples of pressure from the knife hitting the wooden chopping board started to burn through you, but you did not stop. The booming, hitting your ears making you flinch.

“I love you, Morpheus” You whispered against the tears.

“I know” He spoke in that gravelly tortured tone, it was his own way of saying it, he pushed his forehead further against yours, his raven hair tickling against your skin as he winced his eyes. “Goodbye, My rogue dreamer”

“Goodbye, Dream of the endless”

And then you felt his touch slip through your fingers like sand and could no longer feel his hot breath on your skin, no longer feel his soft silk skin against your forehead

You slowly opened your eyes and he was gone.

The knife clattered out of your hand, the piercing and blaring sound of it hitting your kitchen counter echoing around the walls but you did not care. You winced your eyes shut as the sobs started to escape your lips.

You wanted so badly to continue with life the way you had.

But how could you?

How could you just move on from a love like that?

With the most beautiful lover?

You couldn’t.

And you wouldn’t.

Not for a long time at least.

You fell back against the kitchen counter with a defeated whimper. Pain clawing through your heart and your soul.

Oh what you would’ve given for him to swoop into your apartment now and whisk you away to the dreaming.

But you couldn’t.

Couldn’t risk Lorna or anyone else you had cared for in your life.

You just couldn’t.

The TV started counting down and you looked up with glassy eyes realising the time.

"3,2,1 and…Happy New Years!"

You stood silently staring at the TV. This wasn’t exactly how you had planned to bring in the new year. You cast your blurred gaze back to the tomatoes you rather violently destroyed before sighing and throwing them into the pot of pasta cooking on the stove. Wiping at the tears though you knew they would undoubtedly continue you meandered over to the window, from here you could see a few fireworks going off.

Taking a shuddering breath you allowed yourself a moment, staring into the sky, it wasn’t exactly the view from the dreaming. But it mattered not, it was all you had now. Morpheus was gone and now you had to move on, without him.

The reflections of the bright fireworks glistened in your eyes, at least you would remember him.

And no one could take that away from you.

--------------

As soon as he arrived in the dreaming it clouded over, rain pouring down on the inhabitants of his kingdom. Lucienne and Matthew knew right away what it had meant as he strode past them, with a look so devastatingly defeated they shared a knowing glance. The king murmured something about throne room and not be disturbed unless necessary, leaving the two to only theorise on what had happened.

They had put one and one together when you didn’t arrive in the dreaming that night, disappointment clawing at the both of them, only hoping this wouldn’t last.

Morpheus didn’t go to his throne room.

Instead he found himself by a lake, underneath the stars, rain only softly hitting him, dampening his hair as he stood silently his jaw tensed.

He had a duty to carry out, and he would, he always would. But for tonight?

Tonight he would simply let himself be.

Letting the King of Dreams wish that he could, like the guests in his kingdom, dream. So at least maybe then he could dream of you.

#morpheus imagine #dream of the endless #dream of the endless x reader #dream of the endless x you #morpheus #morpheus x reader #the sandman #morpheus x you #the sandman x reader #sandman x you

[literalite]

asks

these r all the asks i got last night about the whole aesthetic discussion i'll answer in order of when i got them :p

truth b told if i started simblr like. today and knew nothing about photoshop then i'd probably be pretty demoralised too but also thats exactly how it was starting simblr anyway i just worked on it until i was happy w my skills... no one gave me a cheat code i just put time and effort into it

i agree with u im ngl like i do sincerely wish everyone had the opportunity to put hours and hours of their lives into learning how everything about this works if thats what they truly wanted. also if anything doing it solely by urself will make the process all the more time consuming but if u ask around for help people (including me! im down to help fr) will usually give it to u and that'll speed up the process more. being mad at me for having that is pointless what am i gna do go back in time and unlearn it all and for what? dsfghjk

okay i did see this being said a lot and uhhhh i was trying to understand it but like. i also don't. like ok with cluttered aesthetic build shots or yknow the odd landscape with heavy bloom shader on it i guess if ur looking at it completely from that pov yeah i guess it looks like some posts that "blow up" r just sort of the same shit. but the fact remains that its also it's good shit like anyone can clutter a room and take a photo of it what really counts here in my opinion anyhow is shot composition. and there's literally preestablished rules for this sort of thing u can google cinematography basics and get it for free... there's a whole field of study looking into what draws the human eye. like maybe the core concepts behind what makes a popular post popular is the same but thats because it just works. if u wanna shy away from that entirely but then complain about ur posts not being as popular then that's very much a u problem it doesn't have anything to do with the rest of us

amen these are my ocs wdym these are "sims" LOLLL these are the real people living in my head if i bust my ass making them look good then thats a choice i made

u can call this an empathy problem and try explain it to me more but i dont see how other people feeling insecure about what their current ability scales up to is any fault of mine or my problem to bend backwards to try fix... or even how i could. like is the standard high now yeah honestly it is. the learning curve was steep as hell when i first started as well. no disagreements here. but what am i supposed to do about it LMAO like i didn't create the human proclivity to be drawn to beauty i just ride off of it.

idk why i'm the bad guy for being honest for my reasoning behind what i do and don't reblog? lots of other people have been saying they dont really care about aesthetics which is great but if i said that i'd literally just be lying to you. i'm not gonna apologise for not lying... i like being able to see the passion and energy poured into the same video game we're all playing it's only natural to appreciate that- if that reads as passive aggression and u don't understand my stance that's fine by me

i would say for me personally try watch visual media that u can recognise as "beautiful" and not to shit on like. cw shows but i mean stuff that is marked by its cinematography being truly excellent. and just really examine how those set and lighting designers use angles and lighting and how the people filming and editing choose to frame their shots to achieve what works. hell looking at art helps with this too. look at other people's stuff on simblr analytically try to seriously work out why it appeals to people the way it does. ik u asked for editing tips but i think it really starts ingame you can have the most incredible editing style but it doesn't work if ur shot comp doesn't work then it'll won't hit as hard

take time to learn what most of the adjustment layers do on photoshop, and what all the blending layers look like, download other people's psds and play with them on top of ur shots to see what works! what u personally think looks good will be different from what i personally think looks good, i like dramatic lighting and muted colours and mid level contrast so not too strong but i can't speak for whether you will too. ALSO im a religious user of @/simmerstesia's psd set here i think a well chosen shot can be really elevated by using something like this to really give it that final polish

additionally if u have any like really specific questions or need some advice u can ask me on discord my dms are open like i can talk u thru it. promise it's not as daunting as it can look

#ask #reply #anonymous

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

yall i just got the funniest angry reblog lmao i cant stop laughing i feel like i reached a tumblr milestone???? gdjsvjsgsj

anyway im not gonna reblog it cause i dont want to give them the attention they want but i do want to say for anyone who might not know that while polyamory is in fact a relatively new term, it was coined around 1990! which is before any gen z or even most younger millenials were born! poly love has been real since before a term was made for it, much like all other identities, and its perfectly okay to not want a label, but some people like having one as it helps finding more people like you, and some of us like to feel seen and feel included! without the term polyamory i never would've made this blog, and never would've lesrned about so many representations and interpretations of poly love!

what we share here is beautiful and worth celebrating! whether you're in a relationship or not, and whatever your relationship dynamic is (again! polycules come in all shapes and sizes!) just know that your identity is valid, and there's nothing wrong with feeling comfort under a label that doesnt hurt anyone 💖

#mod talks

[calkale]

I'd love to hear more of your thoughts in re mi7, cause most of the responses to the movie that I've come across have been positive (which clashes with the way I see it....) and I really agree about the negatives you mentioned (stunts being underwhelming even though they're the trademark of the series, the literal main character being neglected in favor of someone who's appearing in the series for the first time and whose biggest credit is that fuckass cgi disaster excuse for a multiverse movie- fr I had to look Hayley Atwell up to see what she'd even been in- and the long-standing supporting cast including luther, who'd been there since the beginning, just being discarded by the script like litter out of a car window). also it'd be cool to hear about smaller details cause often something is really off about a script and it kinda ruins the whole thing but you don't really know what it was till afterwards, and with new releases you can't rewatch or discuss it with much of anyone else (again, all there is are column reviews and stuff and they're mostly the same and very general on account of staying spoiler-free ).

Okay gonna be honest i havent looked at a single review or post about this movie other than the ilsa one i reblogged this morning cause im still so upset over it. Thank you for sending this ask cause i felt so alone lmao im glad someone agrees with my thoughts.

I hate them for making hayley the main character, if these are the last two movies, which it feel like they are, ethan and luther should really be the main characters along with benji and ilsa, not some new character. All for adding new characters and hayley couldve been in the start of the movie she had a place there she was the thief but after that she literally just took ilsas spot as the “woman of the team” as well as ethans spot in the spotlight.

This movie also seems to go against a lot of things ive heard mcq say in interviews, i cant source them cause i dont remember which ones theyre from but he’s talked about not over explaining things in movies and hes talked about not not wanting a strong female lead thats exactly like what hayelys character is in this movie. The over explaining thing happens SO FUCKING MUCH in this movie i was so bored and it just made me more lost because there was all this information i was taking in CONSTANTLY and i was trying to remember what character was doing what and who they were and it was just too much. I get this movie is probably more of a set up for part two but now we have all this shit we need to remember for part two and i dont even really wanna see it if im being honest, i will but if its anything like part one i know im gonna be disappointed again especially if its going in the direction i think its going.

Ive been trying to remember a lot of the smaller details that i noticed when watching it but a lot of them were part of bigger issues anyway so i just kinda grouped them together. Ill talk about the plot tho cause i knew i was gonna hate it but i didnt know id hate it for this reason. In other mi movies theyre doing the things they do because they have no other choice, in this movie it felt like there were so many choices that couldve been made and they didnt even talk about them it was just we’re doing this and thats it. Like on the train there were definitely better ways of doing that and i get there were short on time but that was almost exactly like the burj khalifa scene. Short on time, cant make a mask, need to meet with someone to make a deal. I just feel like there was so much more that they couldve done with that and the cliff jumping stunt and they just didnt do anything it was so underwhelming.

Going off of that a lot of things in this movie just didnt make sense to me and/or didnt need to be there, the ai villain?? Honestly couldve been cut completely, yes it was creepy but it didnt like actually do anything? everything it did couldve easily just been garbiel messing with the team and that wouldve also given paris more screen time (which i really would’ve liked i loved her character). As much as i loved briggs and degas they also didnt really need to be there? Dont get me wrong they were one of the things i really loved about this movie especially degas but there was really no point in them being there.

The main focus of the movie should have just been getting the keys and destroying them so no one can use the weapon that was on the sub, the ai did not need to be a part of it, someone couldve found the untraceable sub because this is fucking mission impossible!! Thats what happens in these movies!! The impossible!! Im grabbing tom cruise by the shoulders and shaking him nothing impossible happened in this movie

The submarine scene at the start also bothered me. I was fully expecting that to be the big stunt at the start of the movie i was really excited i was constantly like omg wheres ethan, i thought the torpedo or missile they saw on the radar was ethan and that was him entering the sub and something was gonna happen but no, not even close. Not a bad opening just not what i expected and that kinda made it bad.

This is an absolute mess of a post my apologies i have much more to say but i need to get back to drawing benji

#mi7 spoilers #listen i am really happy people like this movie #im glad it has the rating it does #i just dont get it at all #calkaleasks

[baconcolacan]

Hey anon! I think you know who you are based on this last sentence. Just know that I’m not angry or anything okay? I just want to use this as a chance to put out a gen PSA for anyone who decides to come on to my blog to follow me. But I also wanted to answer this for you without all the weird stuff.

My blog PSA below:

Okay so! I’ve said it before, but this blog is nothing but a simple Eddsworld sideblog, just a fun little place for me to share my thoughts, writings, and artworks with people who may be interested!

That being said, I want to make it very VERY clear that I will actively AVOID any kind of drama if I can help it, so I will often delete or ignore asks and messages that might introduce that kind of thing to my blog.

This is not saying I don’t care about issues that may arise, it’s only because I feel as though we have enough blogs and people who can signal boost these kinds of topics. I know how stressful these kinds of things can get for many casual fans of the show, so for the most part, I want to be part of the minority of EW blogs that can act as a REST STOP, just some place you can come over to breathe for a second and just vibe if you need it, to talk about our dumb little online british people show lmao.

My main blog MAY reblog some of the more discoursy content in EW or even just general content that talks about issues that can be deemed stressful, so to followers who still have my main in their follows be aware of that, you can unfollow me there if you’d like.

And again I have to say: I am not proship for people who care, but that is the farthest extent I have ever gotten into this weird online discourse I only recently found out about. I literally dont know much about this topic, as I have said before: I don’t actively use soc med even in my personal life, its only recently I began coming back online.

BUT remember that I am also a Dark Fiction writer, I WILL sometimes make works that portray dark topics, but more often than not they’re portrayed exactly as they are: Traumatic, Horrible, and Not What Anyone Would Want IRL, which I DO tag. So keep that in mind. I won’t hold it against you if you block my darker works or even block ME, your mental health is much more important than any of my works getting traction, as to be honest, this is just a hobby, just something I do for fun.

So again! General PSA: Avoid sending me discoursy topics or problematic stuff in general here on my sideblog. I’m just here to vibe and also group vibe with other cool people I meet, the world and real life is SUPER stressful enough, I don’t want to bring that misery into this online space I’m curating.

#asks #anonymous #Blog PSA #cw discourse talk #Don’t feel bad though anon okay? #I know you didn’t mean to bring any neg stuff here and was just curious about certain things #I won’t hold any of what you said against you I would never! #You’re okay and still welcome in my space k? :] #But yeah you’re right I wasnt the right blog to ask for this ^^;

[shu-glue]

Chapter 4: Annoying

Summary: A day in your life and you think it's going to be another annoying one, but a note always brightens up your day.

A/N: this chapter is focused more on you, the reader, so we're taking a break from suna's shenanigans! thank you guys for reading this series and supporting it, it means a lot to me ♥️ as always, like, reblogs and comments are appreciated! enjoy reading!!

prev / masterlist / next

taglist!

@milkteeboba @fairywriter-oracle @s-adidass @admiringlove @mmmaaannnsssiii @pavo-ocxllus @jojowantstocry @alienvarmint (taglist is still open!)

[THE BOYS™]

Piss Blond [7:31pm]

okay, what about urameshi yusuke?

Local Gossiper [7:31pm]

i dont exactly vibe with him.

Piss Blond [7:32pm]

now i know youre just turning these guys down for the fun of it YUSUKE IS AN ANIME CHARACTER

Osamu Ramsay [7:32pm]

lmao

Suna rolls his eyes skywards as he lies on his bed, homework forgotten on his desk as he stares at his ceiling. His shoulder still hurts, a dull ache in his muscles that he feels when he moves his arm around. His phone buzzes with each message sent to the group chat as he reaches over to grab it.

Piss Blond [7:39pm]

also dont think i didnt notice yall changing my name to PISS BLOND you traitors

Osamu Ramsay [7:39pm]

you want it as highlighter head then

Piss Blond [7:40pm]

YOU WANT ME TO HIT YA

Osamu Ramsay [7:40pm]

YOU CAN TRY SCRUB

Braincell Holder [7:42pm]

….i guess its safe to assume theyve started fighting again

Braincell Holder [7:42pm]

suna, have ya thought of anyone who can tutor you?

Suna frowns at Ginjima's message, sighing. No, he has not. He's been thinking, contrary to what Atsumu thinks, but he hasn't been able to think of anyone to ask to tutor him.

Local Gossiper [7:45pm]

no i havent

Local Gossiper [7:45pm]

anyone you suggest?

Piss Blond [7:45pm]

weve been giving ya suggestions for hours ò_ó

Braincell Holder [7:46pm]

are you guys done fighting?

Piss Blond [7:46pm]

yeah i won

Osamu Ramsay [7:46pm]

in what universe

As the twins start to bicker over chat again, Suna rolls his eyes, tossing his phone onto his bed and lying back down, splaying his arms all over the sheets. He's exhausted from the day he just had. A bunch of Erika's 'friends' had bombed his DMs, and he just resorted to blocking them so his poor phone could take a break from all the notifications.

Suna turns his head, catching sight of your shoujo manga on his nightstand. After much inspecting, he found your name scribbled in small letters on the back of the cover so now he knows that it's definitely yours. Blase and nonchalant you. Who would've thought.

But the fact that you own a shoujo manga isn't the thing that's boggling Suna's mind, it's the fact that you had a picture of you and KITA of all people when you were kids. Did the two of you know each other? He has never seen you two spend time together or even talk at school unless it was about academics. 

Judging by the picture he saw, you two must've known each other since you were kids.

Local Gossiper [7:58pm]

hey. does kita have any friends

Braincell Holder [7:58pm]

thats such a way to ask… of course he does

Local Gossiper [7:58pm]

no i mean like. friends he hangs out with outside of school.

Local Gossiper [7:59pm]

or like. a secret girlfriend.

Piss Blond [7:59pm]

wow, you live up to your name

Local Gossiper [7:59pm]

@Piss Blond you do too

Local Gossiper [7:59pm]

anyway

Local Gossiper [7:59pm]

answer the question pls

Osamu Ramsay [7:59pm]

not really??? we dont exactly keep tabs on what kita does in his free time out of school 

Piss Blond [7:59pm]

and if he had a secret girlfriend, we wouldnt know

Local Gossiper [8:00pm]

oh

So no one knows about you and Kita… aside from Suna…

The 'bingo!' moment has made itself known as Suna thumbs at the manga now on his lap, eyeing the polaroid picture seated carefully between the middle pages.

Local Gossiper [8:01pm]

another question: how do you think will high and mighty react to blackmail

Braincell Holder [8:01pm]

wh

Braincell Holder [8:01pm]

who?

Braincell Holder [8:05pm]

suna???

The first thought you had waking up in the morning was how one of these days, you're really going to throw your alarm clock at the wall. Alas, you decide to just slam on the nefarious object, stopping its incessant ringing. It's annoying.

Groaning, you slowly sit up on your bed, blinking to get used to the light in your room. The sunlight is so annoying.

Your body is aching a bit, and you rub your shoulder to ease the pain. Dammit. Why did you have to be so careless yesterday? First, you practically crashed into Suna Rintarou from 2-1 and right after, realized you lost your copy of 'Love-Hate Relationship with my No-Good, Very Annoying Roommate'.

You were so happy yesterday, too, after Kita asked you (well, your club but he came to you) to make posters for the volleyball club for fundraising. You wanted to do your best for him, so when you informed your president about the favor (to which he didn't even bat an eyelash, much to your expectation and annoyance), you immediately worked on the drafts so you and your friends can start taking reference pictures today.

Now you have an aching shoulder (plus head, did you hit your head yesterday?), a lost manga, and a sour taste in your mouth.

Your alarm clock starts to ring again and you slam your fist onto it, stopping the ringing once again. You groan, rubbing your face as you get out of bed and trudge towards the bathroom. You go about your daily routine; take a shower, brush your teeth, scowl at the dark bags underneath your eyes, put on your uniform. Your movements are sluggish, due to lack of sleep.

You spent the whole night flipping your room inside out looking for your manga. You're going to cry. You even tucked your favorite photo of you and Kita in between the pages. Stupid, stupid, stupid. What if you never find it again?

Sighing dejectedly, you grab your bag and walk out of your room, closing the door quietly behind you. It would be a shame to break the strong silence in your house. As you walk down the hallway, you pass by your parents' bedroom, pausing.

She should still be asleep at this time. And she'll have a massive headache when she wakes up.

Pursing your lips, you silently open the door to your parents' bedroom, blinking to grow accustomed to the darkness inside it. There's a distinctive stench in the room, one you've grown to be familiar with for all the years you've been alive. You sigh. She's at it again.

You have memorized your parents' bedroom like the palm of your hand by now, walking over to the curtains to pull them back, avoiding anything that could make you trip in the process. Once you do, light finally shines in the room, bathing everything in color again.

And you finally see the mess that is your parents' room. The sheets are haphazard, part of it even lying on the floor now. Beer cans and red wine bottles litter the wooden floor and you nudge a can away, a grimace on your face. Honestly, if she was going to do this again, she could have prepared a trash can to dispose of everything as well. Look, there are even cans and bottles on the bed.

And your mother is lying among the cans and bottles and haphazard duvets.

This is so annoying.

You feel your fists clench but you close your eyes and repeat the word "relax" ten times before you open them again, turning on your heel and walking down the stairs. 

You slip into the kitchen and open the fridge, taking out a bottle from your mother’s stock of Korean pear juice and some oranges. You peel the oranges and cut them into slices, putting them in a small bowl before taking out a pack of crackers and a bag of nuts out of the cardboard, placing all of them on a tray. You unscrew the cap on the bottle of Korean pear juice and pour the contents in a tall glass, placing it on the tray as well as some ibuprofen.

You pick up the tray and walk back upstairs back to your parents’ room. Your mother was still asleep, a beer can pressed up against her cheek while she’s none the wiser. You press your lips into a tight line and walk into the room, stepping over trash and cigarette butts, to place the tray on her nightstand. You gently remove the can from her face, tight frown still on your face.

At this, your mother stirs, unfocused eyes blinking open and gathering her bearings for a couple of seconds. She slowly sits up, rubbing her eyes as she groans from the piercing headache. You hand her the ibuprofen. “Here.” You say, and your mother blinks at you once, twice, through her haze and she smiles brightly at you.

“Good morning, sweetie!” She chirps despite her state, accepting the ibuprofen from you. “Thank you, what time is it?”

You check your phone, pursing your lips. “6:30. How are ya feelin’?”

“Oh, my head is pounding!” Your mother complains, whining. “And I feel like I wanna puke.”

“Don’t puke on me.” You quickly say, scrunching your nose at the thought. “And maybe you should stop drinking so much. Yer liver’s gonna give out and yer stinking up the place.”

Your mother opens her mouth, about to say something, and closes it. Instead, she sighs, nodding slowly. “Yer probably right. I’ll try to cut back just for ya!” She says to you, giving you an apologetic smile and you frown, furrowing your eyebrows.

“Ya always say that.” You grumble, averting your gaze away. “But ya never do.”

She goes silent, her eyes finally clearing up as she takes your words in. Her expression softens into a sad smile as her gaze falls downcast to her lap. You would have thought she looked ashamed. “Well, it’s a miracle I’m still alive!” She suddenly replies, going back to being bright and you give her a cold gaze. “Anyway, come have a bite, honey! You haven’t had breakfast yet, have ya?”

“How’d ya know that?” You ask, deadpan.

“It's a motherly instinct, ya know!”

She’s always like this. So talkative, and happy, and full of energy, and she’d fall into a deep depression where she’d drink all day, maybe all night if she doesn’t pass out fast enough. When she’d wake up, she’d have a hangover so bad she couldn’t get out of bed, and she’d be happy and acting like a mother again.

She always does it. You’re used to it.

And like every time, you don’t kick up a fuss and decide to just humor her, taking a drink of the Korean pear juice. It’s sweet and thick and kind of disgusting. Maybe it’s in your head (or maybe it’s the brand).

“You can have the rest of it. I’ll just eat on the way to school.” You hand the glass back to her with a grimace. She smiles sadly as you turn to leave.

“Yer a good child, honey.” Your mother says. “I don’t know how I’d live without ya.”

You pause, looking at your mother with cold eyes. She stares at you contemplating, swirling the pear juice in the cup. “Ya have yer papa’s eyes.” She blurts out, in her own little world once again, uncaring of the people outside of it. “Yer so like him. So like yer father. How he’d love you.”

At her words, your body freezes, staring at your mother with hard eyes. You don’t say anything.

She snaps out of it again and sighs, nodding her head. “I said something wrong again, didn’t I?” She laments, frowning.

You quickly avert your gaze, gritting your teeth. “Ya always do.” You say. “I’m going to school. Jus’ order delivery when ya get hungry.” Without waiting for her response, you exit the room and run out of the house. Your mother stares after you, her face sullen, and she looks at the mess in the room.

“Maybe I should clean up.”

You walk down the street, fingers gripping the strap of your bookbag. The birds are chirping, the sun is shining brightly (at this hour?), and people are already out and about doing their own thing. How annoying. You make a quick trip to the convenience store to buy yourself some melon bread. Convenience store food isn’t normally that good, but your rumbling stomach doesn’t really care where the food is coming from as long as it makes it to your digestive system.

A shame that your favorite bakery is closed for renovations.

You say thank the cashier as you pay for your melon bread and you exit the convenience store, immediately chowing down on the piece of bread as you walk towards the bus stop. It’s so good, you’re almost tempted to go back and buy a second one.

You arrive at the bus stop on time and wait for the bus to arrive, chewing on your almost finished melon bread in the meantime as you look around. You see a small dog standing by the edge of the sidewalk. It’s beside its owner who’s talking to somebody on her phone and it’s looking at you with its big ole’ eyes. When it barks at you, you narrow your eyes at it and it seems that that small action was enough to send it whimpering and hiding behind its owner.

The woman pauses, side-eyeing you and mumbling under her breath before going back to talking on the phone. You side-eye her back.

You finish eating your melon bread just as the bus arrives, discarding the wrapper in the trash bin before getting on. Just your luck, all the seats are occupied, rendering you unable to sit down. Figures.

Earphones in their rightful place, you hang onto the handlebars as you try to ignore everyone else around you. The ride to your stop wasn’t that eventful, aside from a baby staring at you with its unnerving big eyes (you stared back at it), and the bus slowly rolls to a stop nearby Inarizaki. A lot of people bump into you while getting off the bus, which irritates you even more. Relax, ten times, deep breath.

At least no one bumps into you on your way to the school gates, the look on your face is enough to make them jump away from your path. Very convenient.

You arrive at the school gates with time to spare, your hands stuffed into the pockets of your blazer jacket, when you hear a chirp voice from behind you. “Senpai!”

You turn around and nearly grunt when you’re almost tackled with a tight hug, looking down to see the smaller stature of Nana, who’s grinning up at you. “Good morning!” She greets, loosening her hold on you a bit.

You blink and allow a small smile on your face, patting your head. “Good morning, Nana.” You greet back. Nana’s normally brash and rude (she was to you when you first met) but she does an entire 180 when it comes to you. It’s like a younger sister looking at her older sibling.

The two of you start to walk to the school building. “Look, look!” She says, grabbing her Canon EOS, and going through the pictures, grinning widely. “I was walkin’ towards the convenince store, yeah? Because my Ma wanted ta make some maki sushi rolls but we didn't have any seaweed wrapper cuz' she forgot, anyway—"

You listen with rapt attention as Nana shows you around a dozen pictures of a ladybug on a weed growing from a crack on the sidewalk, the setting sun serving as the backlight of the photos. "—and then a bunch'a twats were walkin' by and ruinin' my shot and of course, I had ta give 'em a piece o' my mind, so I did jus' that! But then, the ladybug flew away!" She laments, shaking her camera and you gently take it from her, looking through the photos.

You nod as you look at each one. "These photos are beautiful, Nana. I don't see any problem with 'em, the layout's good, the lighting's just right. I didn't expect less from ya." You say, smiling as you hand her back her camera.

Nana practically beams at you. If she was a puppy, her tail would be wagging behind her frantically. 'I can almost see the puppy ears…' You think as you look at her. 

When the both of you arrive at the shoe lockers, you see Ryuji putting away his shoes. He notices the two of you and smiles, waving. "Good morning—!" He greets but is cut off by Nana.

"Ryuji! Gimme back my manga, ya ass!!!" Nana yells at him, doing a 180 once again as she stomps up to the tall third year. You follow behind her, giving Ryuji a small wave and a 'good morning'.

Ryuji glares at her. "A good morning woulda been great, Nana. And use honorifics when ya talk to me, I'm your senior!" He says, pointing at her.

"I can talk how I want, especially ta someone who's been hogging all my manga volumes and not givin' em back!" Nana retorts, pointing back at him.

"Please be quiet." You say to the both of them, voice icy, and they immediately stop, standing straight with a meek 'right!'.

Nana makes an ‘ah’ sound and turns to you, eyebrows raised. “Speaking of manga, senpai, did ya find the manga you were lookin’ fer yesterday?” She asks you and you stop, robotically turning your head to look at her for one, two seconds, before you turn back to your locker and—with a loud bang—hit your forehead against the metal.

“No…” You lament, and you're sort of glad that there were no students around to see your embarrassing plight. As you remember practically turning your room inside out last night looking for that recent volume of Love-Hate, you feel like crying. No, you are going to cry.

"Woah! Don't cry over it now, come here." Ryuji says, patting your head as he tries to comfort you.

"I mean, it's just a comic, senpai, ain't anythin' important…" Nana says, voice flat.

Ryuji snaps his head to glare at her. "Don't say that right now!" 

"Well, I'm right…"

"Ya threatened ta punch me over yer manga!"

"No, I didn't!"

"Not verbally!"

"It's not just the manga…" You say, rubbing your temple as you try to get rid of the growing headache. "I put my favorite picture of myself and my friend in between the pages… and now it's gone."

Nana and Ryuji glance at each other, lips pursed into tight frowns. "There's nothin' ta ba guilty about, I'm sure ya can find the picture." Ryuji reassures you, patting your shoulder. "And if ya don't, you can always take more with your friend."

You look up at him, eyes blinking, and you nod, muttering a 'thanks'. "Sure, if it's Ryuji, it's 'oh he's so kind', 'he's so caring', but if it's me, it's 'Nana, don't be rude' 'Nana, stop that'." Nana deadpans but slings an arm around your shoulder nonetheless. "Buuut, ta add to Ryuji's statement, I'll always be available ta take the pictures myself!"

You blink at both of them, fiddling with your uniform, before you hug them both, sighing. "Thanks, ya really ground me." You say, pulling away from them.

As the two of them talk and bicker behind you, you open your locker, about to reach in to take your slippers. But something flutters out of the shoe locker, much to your surprise. Glancing behind you, you check if Nana and Ryuji are paying attention.

Seeing as they're busy bickering about Nana's manga again, you pick up the piece of paper and peek at the contents.

The familiarity of the handwriting makes your stomach flutter, and it takes everything within you to keep from blushing on the spot. It's embarrassing, how such a short, simple note from him can elicit such a reaction from you.

'Come meet me. School rooftop.'

Insider Pursuit! Asagao Pharmaceutical Inc.

Founded in 2001, the company is now owned by the Asagao Group, spearheaded under the direction of the group's second son and his wife, retired actress who had lead roles in "Maiden of the Moon", "My Heart Still Remains in Tokyo", and "Petrichor". The couple's eldest daughter, Miki, oldest of three, is set to be the heiress of Asagao Group and will inherit Asagao Pharmaceutical Inc. in the near future.

#suna x reader #haikyuu x reader #suna rintaro x reader #suna rintarou x reader #suna x female reader #haikyuu x fem!reader #suna rintarou #miya atsumu #miya osamu #haikyuu inarizaki #shu writes #please teach me how to be a girlfriend

[pink-booty-butts]

negative and whiny ramble under the cut, please ignore if you're not comfortable with that!!

ugh ok i really fucking hate talking about my feelings or being negative in general but i've kinda been feeling like this for a while so i feel like i need to just put it out there so i can go back to being happy lmao

highkey I kinda feel like I spend so much time focusing/putting effort into this fandom but idk really if anyone cares about my presence or me in general and it's kinda discouraging. I'm not saying that to ask for sympathy/validation, but rather to express that I'm probs going to only write if someone sends me a request for a while cos putting all this effort into coming up with ideas/writing fics on my own is not really vibing atm, honestly the past few weeks everyday i've just been staring at a blank doc when i get home from work lmao

even though i've mentioned being busy, I kinda have a decent amount of free time to work on fics or chat but it kinda feels like no one really cares, and my perspective is why would I put effort into something if no one cares ya know? bc of that i tend to favor doing or participating in things where i feel more appreciated or seen, like I'd rather focus my energy into other goals or people that do care. whenever I take time to write fics I'm actively pushing those people away or putting less time into other goals i want to achieve in order to do so, and while I do enjoy writing very much there's no need for me to post it on this blog or interact in this fandom if no one cares. if people don't like my work then that's fine, but also there's not really any point in me posting fics or taking time to write if people don't really find my stuff interesting.

i feel really bad for saying this, but sometimes i kinda feel like people only really care about me/what i have to say when im cheering them on or supporting them & their work. of course i genuinely mean all of the things i say when i do that and i dont want people to think i expect the same energy from them because i dont, but when the only response i get from people is related to me doing that it kinda feels like people only care about me being their cheerleader. i've tried telling myself that it's okay to be treated that way bc i do want to encourage everyone, i think everyone in this fandom makes amazing things and has fantastic ideas!! but i think at this point its starting to get to me bc i just don't really feel valued or like people care about the stuff i put out. and if thats the case then i should probably just stick to sending people compliments and reblogging everyone else's work as opposed to putting effort into a space where i am not wanted, bc im tired of constantly feeling like i have to put more and more effort in, berating myself for not being friendly enough or not being positive enough or being too annoying or mean, and then i go back to my coping mechanism of trying to bury all of my negative emotions and be a happy little robot friend to everyone (which i have been trying very hard to not do this past year or so bc it honestly ruined my life)

that being said, as I said earlier I'll write stuff if people send requests but I'm probably not going to post any original fics for a while. I have some stuff I've been wanting to write and a lot of wips so I might come back or post some stuff even if no one sends me any requests, but if i just disappear/ghost then this is probably why haha

#rants n rambles #very sorry in advance if this hurts anyones feelings bc thats not my intention!! #i just really needed to get this off my chest bc its kinda been bugging me for a hot minute #i think you're all amazing and wonderful people!! #i promise i mean it!!

[noxiatoxia]

Hi! So I have a few things I wanted to say/ask so hopefully this isn't too long or out of place or anything

Okay so first off, you always reblog and say such nice things about my art in the tags and I wanted to say I appreciate it so much, I never know what to say but like you're the backbone of the hikakao community so it feels like a seal of approval in a way haha. And your art is so amazing like, damn! I love it sm. Kaoru has been my fav character for nearly a decade so I love seeing that its not just me he has a grip on, and as an autistic person myself who loves princesses’ and specifically Cinderella… well your hc means a lot to me haha. Oh and your hanahaki fic??? I ugly cried. SO damn good like the characterizations… one of the best Hikakao fics I've read on god

So I kinda wanted to ask two things, first being if you had to choose for the other hosts to have a fav princess who would it be? Im personally very partial to Tamaki loving Belle, given the like french beauty and romanticism of it all, plus her giving herself up for the safety of a parent connection. I like the idea of him being kinda dumb and taking it as you need natural inner AND outer beauty, which he oh so obviously has in spades and that kind of nonsense. Idk I was just curious if you'd have an opinion on this as ive been giving it some thought lately. Especially on Hikaru, I think he would like a more down to earth princess that doesn't have too much frills or singing in the film, like Merida because it's the most adventurous one without character songs if you're just going off disney. But idk I feel like another princess would suit him better, I just can't think of one rn

Second was if you had any thoughts or analysis of how the maid the twins had when they were young impacted them and their development? And more importantly how it impacted them each differently? Like obviously her saying no one may ever be able to tell them apart fucked with their heads, but like idk. Ive been thinking about it. And what if they never met her, and she never said that? Would they of been less warped? I think they'd just meet someone else who they liked who couldn't tell them apart, who'd just say the same thing in a different way. But how key was her betrayal of trust during a high stakes robbery of their parent's estate to all this? Im just musing at this point lmao

Oh also less an ask but I personally hc Kaoru to dissociate and the like frequently, and how maybe them being in sync all the time in their mannerisms really helps him with his autopilot moments, and Hikaru is always ready and able to catch him up to speed on what's happening and what they just did, if its something he would care to know that is. And I hc Hikaru as bipolar, his depression just manifests really angerly instead of traditional sadness. But my point is I love the idea that they're just so used to the other that any mentally ill or neurodivergent behavior one of them does the others just like “Oh yeah Kaorus just like that. You know how it is. What do you mean you don't know anyone afraid of hairdryers? Like legit afraid? Yeah no thats just a thing. Hmm. Well you should get over it it's his fear not yours I dont see how it concerns you.” and like gets defensive if anyone tries to say it's weird lmao

Okay that was long oops I hope this wasn't out of place or weird or anything, I got excited talking about it haha. Hope all is going well!!

THIS IS SO FUCKING SWEET YES!!! I WAS DRAWING HIKAKAO RIGHT AS YOU SENT THIS ASK TOO BTW.... i was htinking like, should i post this... theres kissing..... but then i remember why it's so rewarding to do what I love <3 really and truly. I've met SO many incredibly kind, creative, and thoughtful people through hikakao it's insane. And tbh it makes me want to never stop posting about them even if it nets me hate every now and again LMAO it's just, stuff like this is irreplaceable to me. And I LOVE your art!!!!!! It's SO cute... the picture of Kaoru dressed as cinderella made me legit scream. I sent it to all my friends and showed it to my brother haha. The whole Kaoru/Cinderella headcanon is very personal to me as you can probably gather from my carriage posting. so whenever I see it I go nuts (in a good way. it not destructive).

I think it's very funny (in a good way) that you already had a special interest in princesses, esp Cinderella. For me, it's like...I can NOT look at anything Cinderella related normally anymore because I'm reminded of the carriage allegory, and yet we have Cinderella movie nights every thursday now because of me...I describe my relationship with Cinderella as "stockholm syndrome" because i legit didn't care about or really even know Cinderella before all this went down, but now she is my Worst Enemy but Best Friend and if anybody says Cinderella is mid I'm blowing up another hostage.

Also!!! Thank you so much about the fic!!! While looking back I feel like there are def things I could improve on, I do really like that fic. As somebody who's personally arospec, I have trouble writing the "feelings" of romance so I tried my best. I have other Hikakao adjacent stories I'm writing and I wanna post them here!!!

Okay, onto the questions...firstly, YES, Tamaki DOES seem like the type to love Belle. He may also enjoy Rapunzel and her whole being held captive her whole life because maybe he feels the same way with his own family situation. Haruhi strikes me as a little mermaid type, no real reason, I just get that vibe. Although Kyoya probably relates to the original fairytale of the little mermaid in some ways for sure. I actually HC Mori's favorite movie is Beauty and the Beast, so he's probably also really into Belle. As for Hani, I'm not sure...Giselle, maybe. He likes her whimsy.

Hikaru is interesting, because I feel like he's like Me in which he HATES Cinderella because he has to hear about it 24/7 but if ANYBODY said anything mean about cinderella he'd be like...you bitch...you take that BACK. Altho I have this headcanon that Hikaru's favorite princess is Alice from Alice in Wonderland (tho she really isn't a "princess") because he always liked that movie better. Kaoru would cry as a kid tho when Hikaru said he thought that movie was better so he pretended to like Cinderella more. But he doesn't. Merida tho...that's a very good choice, I can defff seeing Hikaru being a big Merida fan.

So, to the second question: it's very interesting! What stood out about that maid to Hikaru and Kaoru was the fact she was mean to them. being raised as rich and "better" than everyone else, all the maids HAD to be nice or they got fired pretty much, so to see a maid go against that status quo, to treat them honestly...that's why they liked her so much.

If anyone else had said "nobody will be able to tell you two apart", would it have hurt? sure. But it wouldn't be devastating, because they likely wouldn't care about that person's opinion. but they liked this maid, they looked up to her in a weird way. Having somebody you like and trust tell you something hurtful is way more harmful than if a stranger did it.

Now...would they be LESS twisted if it never happened? I doubt it. I mean, maybe they'd be LESS focused on looking identical, but they would still be rather cruel and mischievous, because that's how they were simply raised: they were raised being taught their actions have no consequences, because they're better than everyone else. Simple by being "Hitachiins", they had a pass to do all sorts of nasty shit to people because they were rich and powerful. Besides, canonically, their mom & dad were barely in their lives, and child neglect causes the children to act out to get attention, usually via things that would get them scolded. So, while they miiight not have been AS keen on matching had that maid never said what she did before leaving them forever, they would probably be just as mean and cruel.

To le third point: YES that is so good. Kaoru very much dissociates in my heart of hearts as well. He has days on end where he doesn't feel like he's in his own body, everything's sort of a blur, he can't remember things well...Hikaru's there for him in those moments at least.

I always saw Hikaru and Kaoru as ADHD/Autism solidarity. But bipolar is an interesting one, too. I could def see it.

Also the hairdryer thing FUCKING RELATABLE...I'd think Kaoru is "afraid" of hairdryers/thunder - just really fucking loud noises that are sudden and/or unceasing. They don't make him "cower" necessarily but like, he gets super jittery/irritated because he gets overwhelming anxiety from it. Hikaru as a kid probably didn't understand why his brother acted so strangely to certain sights/sounds/touches, and maybe at first teased him about it, but when it was clear these things actually DISTRESSED Kaoru he stopped and did everything he could to make him feel better. and if anybody makes fun of kaoru for it Hikaru beats the shit out of them.

This was super nice ;w; I love receiving long asks, asks about ouran and the twins especially. legit if you ever wanna talk about them u can send an ask or DM me you seem really nice!!

#;noxiatalks2ya #hikakao #ohshc

[blurrycow]

ok so i ended up watching the first three episodes w out my friends because I couldn’t wait (I feel bad now but aaaaaaa) and this is what I learned

- Diego is a shit dad: probably because he never really had a good model to look up to as a kid. I was surprised that his kid was white???? and not adopted??? How does a desi person and a hispanic person have a white biological child????? Please explain, netflix good lord

- on the related note of the child, stanley, he’s fucking fantastic. Kid can make a hell of a molotov cocktail. 

- Reggie is... surprisingly sad this season? He looked kind of like a drowned rat and I almost felt bad for him then i remembered that he locked Klaus in a maloseum

- I expected to like Sloane but she’s kind of manipulative. I don’t know what to think of her.

- Luther acted high the entire time but maybe that’s just how he usually is, I don’t remember. I haven’t watched the other seasons in a long time

- They handled Viktor’s coming out very very well! I loved the different reactions. My brother was talking when Viktor came out to Allison so I didn’t get to hear it, but I especially loved how enthusiastic Luther was about it. 

- Five!!!!!! Five five five. I missed seeing him so so so much. I’m so glad he’s back. I loved how he was able to take a step back and just enjoy! I also found it funny how it was the complete opposite than it was in my World’s Largest Ball Of Twine fic- in the fic, Five was on a mission, and Klaus just wanted to see some sights, so he was the one who yanked the wheel into the exit. In the actual episode, the roles were completely reversed!!! 

- Lila my beloved!!!! She is so so pretty. I will never not find it funny how she and Five can go from killing each other to casual conversation. (Also, the plaid skirt fit???? that was hot as fUCK) (Id let her kill me in a heartbeat) (maybe im just depressed though)

-I am so so so so glad that they are finally letting Allison lose her shit. SHE HAS BEEN THROUGH A HELL OF A LOT OF STUFF!!!! SHE DESERVES TO LOSE IT IF SHE WANTS!!!! and she does and thats fucking fantastic!!! Im so glad for her!!!!!

- klaus’s aunt was only in the show for like a brief two scenes but she’s awesome i love her

- Ben is an asshole, lmao

- I wish Marcus hadn’t died! You theorists got it right. I’m disappointed but not surprised. 

- I know Grace was religious in the comics but not THIS RELIGIOUS JESUS CHRIST WHAT HAPPENED TO THE ICONIC ‘HARGREEVES IS NOT GOD’ PANEL??? Grace honey the kugelblitz is not your lord and savior 

- (Gerard Way, please see a therapist)

- my immediate thought was JAYME THE RAINWING but she’s actually got a super cool power. The dance scene had me in literal tEARS

- on that note Five’s scene with Dolores!! Jayme that was cruel. 

- (does anyone else know what he was saying to Dolores? I know it was italian but I don’t know italian) 

- Alphonso was pretty cool! HOW on earth did all you fanfic writers predict the voodoo doll thing???? 

- HARLAN. I GUESSED HIM AS SOON AS I SAW THE CASSETTES. It made me so happy to see him!!! I missed him!!!! 

- AND ALSO MR. PENNYCRUMB. I saw the collar and immediatley went “THATS HIM THATS MY DOG” and he didnt end up belonging to Five but its oKAy (and then he fucking DIED)

- Luther child. people know what condoms are

- Christopher is so weird wtf. he dont even got a personality he just a cube

- if i have more notes ill reblog this post but i dont remember them rn

#tua season 3 spoilers #the umbrella academy season 3 spoilers #tua3 spoilers #the umbrella academy spoilers #i felt really bad watching it without my friends so im not gonna watch more until they get home #which will probably be abt a week #ive watched enough that i dont feel left out which was mainly the problem #tua #the umbrella academy #the umbrella academy s3