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#its so much fun but i cant get the controls to work when im fighting ✌✌✌✌✌
stealingyourbones · 1 year
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Your asks are back! Im prolly gonna send a few tomorrow bc its late and i have many idea but an idea that Wont Let Me Go:
Danny gets caught by his parents. They dissect him and jazz is the one to free him, but he has to go. Now. But where does he go?
Gotham. The drs fenton went there once and caused enough chaos to be banned from the city or else risk arkham. Its the one place they might not find him.
Danielle goes with him. Maybe shed hunkered down in gotham for a bit, maybe shes passing by amity when sht hits the fan. Either way, its her and danny. They figure it wont be too hard to get by. Break into an empty apartment and hide out there until they get caught, couldnt be too hard, right?
Too bad the building they go for is the one jason stays in, as a civillian, and hes got every apartment on his floor so that the risk of a neighbor seeing him as hood is minimal. Jason has to figure out how these kids got into the apartment and who is making them spy on red hood.
He does this by giving them the one thing kids in need cant afford to turn down- free meals. He invites them over to cook and teaches them how, both to see what hes dealing with and give them those skills once theyre out of whatever situation theyre in.
This goes on for a while before jason had the horrifying realization.
Hes turing into Bruce. Two kids in need with black hair and blue eyes who tense up when vigilantes are brought up? Hes never going to live this down. Probably frantically texts dick(?) About how hes turing into bruce and then doesnt elaborate
Unbeknowst to him, theyve secretly been "treating" him by acting as filters/replacing some of his extoplasm so he can be sure of his control over his feelings. This doesnt necessarily make him 100% calm all of the time, he still gets angry pretty easily, but. Jason gets control of himself back.
As they get closer they start being significantly more domestic. Somehow nobody has crashed jasons apartment while theyre there (they dip invisibly) and jasons relationship with bruce has improved as he no longer has to worry about pit rage taking over. Hes trying to figure out how to break the news to bruce that hes a grandfather even though he hasnt officially adopted them yet.
Dani, on the other side of town, is gossiping with a cool girl at the library named barbara about how shes been trying to figure out how to tell her neighbor that Hes Her Dad Now.
(Danny doesnt call him dad. He cant, anymore. But theyre still family)
Jason decides to introduce the topic of them meeting bruce (because 1. even though its still rocky their relationship has improved and 2. He wants it to be on his terms) and dani bursts out with the "I have a GRANDPA???????" and from there on commits to calling jason her dad and bruce (unmet) her grandpa.
Bruce meets them first and is just. In awe. He has grandchildren. His emotional constipation vs his absolute adoration of the fact hes a GRANDPARENT fight fight fight.
When danny and dani eventually meet everyone theyre all like oh sick bruce picked up a duo this time nice to meet you. And they absolutely cannot comprehend it when bruce and jason walk in and dani goes to jason first. Nobody expected jason to take on bruces adoption tendencies but they should have.
(Also fun hc i couldnt work in naturally but i do fully stand by- the ectoplasm in dannys body does affect his injuries somewhat, meaning he heals naturally very quickly from most ghost fights. Why?
It heales based on emotional healing.
He doesnt really care all too much about the average cut from one of his rogues and they heal within the day, but a hit from valerie takes a few weeks.
The first injury his parents ever gave him still hurts.
He can barely move and cant talk for the first few weeks with jason. Only once he starts feeling safe with him do the cuts start coming back together.)
The casualness of “hi so glad your asks came back” [drops at least 1k worth of fucking stellar content that’s basically a fic] is just making me truly awestruck. God I’ve missed seeing y’all’s neat ideas.
I dont have any words that I can say that could describe just how wonderful this is so I’ll write a lil addition to it instead because I am in love with this sm.
Jason’s point of view when he’s slowly getting better and isnt afraid to meet his family because of the pit rage, has he explained that’s the reason he distanced himself? Do the bats just think that this is simply Jason finally getting the courage to reach out? Do they know that the Pit rage is stopping Jason and do they try to help him by using alternative means of communication? How much do they help and understand.
When Jason experiences his first injury. How much does it hurt? Valerie shoots him with an ectogun. How much is this man in pain for and does he have to fight pit rage inside him to not lash out and attack her after being injured?
And how does his core react to his new kids. This I NEED to know
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Fable 2, may the frustration begin!
"Alrighty, let's go, I've already had a break after crying about Rose and Sparrow and I just named the dog Snape"
"Fuckin hell, there's a hurricane outside haha hope it doesn't take away the power haha"
"Woow, the shirt I'm wearing is -5.0 attractive! That's so mean!"
"I put my wagon up for rent cuz im smart this time"
Game: someone just tried to flirt with you
Me: damn, bad taste
"Theresa just said 'come with me' AND THEN WALKED IN THE WAY. MOVE BITCH MOOOOVE"
Theresa: when you come out from there, you're gonna be stronger-- much stronger
Me: from puberty
"Snape found something... it's a Ball! Thank god, I thought it was gonna be a condom"
"The controllers are a bit awkward, but that's probably more on me since I've been playing more pc lately"
"Old tomb, oh no Snape is scared! My baby:("
Game: this is what the different colour orbs mean
Me, laughing awkwardly: haha yeah I'm not gonna remember that
"Sluuurp it up like bubble tea!... oh ew"
*opens a chest*
*dog barks*
Me: yeah thanks I already found it...
"I think this is actually one of the times I prefer shooting enemies"
*actually uses the melee weapon*
"Oh, no I think I'm still a melee weapon bastard"
"There's some letters on some skeletons and they're all like 'I'm gonna poison my mates' so yeah they all poisoned eachother, brilliant"
"Ya know, the orbs are kinda like bubble tea... I've only had apple, oh or maybe frog eggs... you know what? Nevermind."
"Savin station, gotta love mah savin station"
Game, after I've slurped up the orbs: outstanding work!
Me: thank you! You know, I like this kinda of encouragement
*orbs slurped up and character glowing and stepping back*
Me: iiiiiii don't wanna say what I'm thinking but I'm gonna anyways... she just had an orgasm
"Oh look, a bright light in the middle of the room, that doesn't scream 'sword in the stone' at all"
Theresa: there were many with the hero blood in their veins, then there were none-
Me: cuz someone decided to be asexual
Theresa: now, step into the circle
Me: last time I did that my sister and then myself got shot soooo
"Fine, I'll step into the light"
"Holy shit, I just saw her underwear cuz of the animation"
"Crap she's talking about the orbs"
"Something about Will"
"Ooh, I spot another water dive thing"
"Omg swim faster, what? There's a rock in the way? Well fuck it and swim through it"
"If this is a condom- oh a weapon, nice"
"Ooooh... B is NOT the swim faster.. A is hahaaah oops"
"Ohohoh, a bunny! Ooh I can run?? Ooh I can throw the force? Hehe get back here ya lil shit. Fucking hell, yeah you get away this time! Until I figure out the controls, that is"
"Theres supposed to be a door here, Where's the door"
"Oh there it is, cant do anything about it I'm sure but there is it"
"Oh no, it's the smart door"
"I cant even laugh, the author door wasn't mean about it, unless it was and I'm just stupid"
"Damn, this guard really looked at this teen(?) And went 'yeah you look like a person who can fight, go do our job' like thanks I guess"
"Time to fight a bitch"
"Came a guy by, name Dick, and I had to take the safety off so I could kill him"
"But I'm the good guy I promise"
Game: you inhabit a morally grey area, doing what you feel like, when you feel like it
Me: wow, that is just me in every game ever holy shit
"Some times the sound will just disappear and its the game which makes this annoying, or I think it is..."
"It was the xbox, that decided mid game that switching sound source would be fun, and it was not fun"
"I hope I saved..."
"Almost pressed new character, scared me"
"I should delete the other saves..."
"I'm trying to get a discount with a trader by being funny"
"Hehe 19% off"
"Oh right, heart means they love me... this is gonna be a nightmare"
"Oh my god what have I created, corset, short shorts and long boots oh no I look like a whore"
"Theresa is gonna be so disappointed like 'I left you alone for ONE minute' omg"
"But atleast I'm 20% hot"
"The Y button is NOT inventory!!"
"Omg, her new hair... and make up... jesus"
"So, how attractive am I? 20% for clothes, 10% for hair and 12% for make up, that's pretty good, I mean I look like a slut but ya know"
"Crap, I was gonna go see Theresa"
"I've just been crying while trying to make swords and it's probably horrible, I'm so sweaty from the anxiety but I made 336 coins"
"I changed my name to dumpling and I'm feeling weird about it"
"Earning money so I can buy houses so I can be a horrible landowner to put rent up so I can continue this"
Game: you're now a blacksmith!
Me: jesus christ no
Game: you've successfully made 7 swords
Me: don't @ me like that, I have emotions
Game: this villager is attracted to you-
Me: that's a first
"Heheh, this man loves me, and now I got 25% off"
"I stole something from a chest and it gave me +5 in evil and guess what it is? A fucking condom"
"I got evil for stealing a condom"
"Eeehhh, looks like i gotta play more lute to get that up"
"Hehe"
"Fable is just like stitch, need to get my good-ness level up"
"I've earned 3k and only 82 swords but I also lost like 400years of my lifetime die to stress so"
"I need 400 more to buy a house ugh"
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nerves-nebula · 1 year
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2012 has so much room for character analysis. And analysis in general.
I watched it when It was coming out on tv and have been rewatching it for the past couple months very slowwwllllyyyy. Shshsbbdd
Anyway I'm just getting nna ramble my analysis in your direction.
Starting with Mikey! Par tof the reason people sorta cling to Mikey I think is cuz like, splinter sorta ignores him.
It's this sorta odd thing going on where we have scenes like splinter telling Donnie to act more like Mikey cuz he's thinking to much and it's impeding his abilities cuz he's overthinking. Which, is an attempt to address Donnie's anxiety albeit in not the best way but it sorta worked?
Which means splinter is acknowledging mikeys fighting prowess. And that Mikey not thinking to hard and just doing is a good skill to be able to execute.
But ALSO, we get a scene of when the boys first got their weapons, and splinter tells everyone why they're getting what weapon, and why they'll enjoy it. Except Mikey. Mikey just gets nunchucks. Which, is dead ass the hardest weapon to wield there so what the fuck dude?
And Mikey is, so fuckin smart. His brain just in Canon goes too fast for him to remember words and shit. He's so adhd frfr
But Leo is dead ass the golden child. Like, everyone asked to be leader, cuz they are teen boys, but splints chose Leo cuz "he asked for it" and then instills all his ideals in him! He's treated like he's the best at everything and is expected to be the best at everything AND to care for his brothers. And he can only feels like he doesn't really have a life. Which leads into the whole Leo develops a crush on his half sister while not knowing she's his half sister nonsense.
Donnie is just, he's the smart one. He's stressed all the time, but also a. Fucking simp who is never reprimanded by his dad for how he treats april, which he really should be! Having mindmap of every possible way an interaction could go with her is creepy! And literally stalking her!!!! Donnie's also the one who deals with Timothy and he gets in trouble for it with splints despite not even wanting to be dealing with it himself. It's a mess.
Raph has just, obvious anger issues. And splinter does not address them in a healthy way frequently. It's a lot of, "just breathe" and Raph is just: "I want to punch someone or something yesterday."
OH and splint sets his brothers shoot him with plungers while yelling at him and roah like, has a whole ass panic attack. That manifests aggressively cuz raphs anger oh so obviously comes from anxiety. But splinter like never picks up on that.
2012 splints treats the boys like students more then sons ALOT. But also cares about them enough to do shit like, break brain control cuz he didn't wanna kill them ✌️
I could probably word that better but I'm still a little high on laughing gas rn cuz I just had a dentist appointment.
yall be out here writing fandom dissertations & shit after going to the DENTIST yknow what I do after going to the dentist??? lay around in mild agony cause my sensitive ass teeth hurt...
anyway these are fun times.
i still cant get over the fact that i made my neglected turtles stay underground and never go out as a way to reflect my weird family isolation as a kid and then i watched the first ep of 2012 and it was like "yea they're fifteen and they've never left the sewers. they only know each other" and im LIKE!! WHAT!! THEY'VE LITERALLY ALMOST FINISHED PUBERTY AND THEY NEVER LEFT THEIR HOME???? THEY ONLY KNOW EACH OTHER????
i dont think the writers understand how fucked up that makes you and your relationships to people and its just like a part of the turtles story i guess???
LIKE THINKING ABOUT IT, I GET IT, and im sure thats how it is in a lot of tmnt iterations, but thats crazy. these boys would be so fucked up irl.
sorry for the ramble i just aint got much to say about ur analysis, cant say if i agree or not cause i aint even watched much 2012 lol.
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charlie-artlie · 5 months
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just got back from the fnaf movie, i really need to go to bed but i have to get some thoughts out NOW 🫠
positives
movey good C:
matthew lillard was just so so good god bless
the animatronics were amazing, i really wasn’t expecting the scene where they all played and had fun together????? it was such wish fulfillment i was just sitting there like is this real
(on that note HEY. someone had better gif that fronnie scene were theyre just playing and dancing together. 👉 get on it giffers)
maybe controversial but i liked the matpat and coryxkenshin cameos a lot they were funny and didnt detract from the flow too much
the jumpscares were not terribly hacky like i thought theyd be, and the balloon boy one was really good 👏
also IM NOT CRAZY THAT WAS A CIRCUS BABY REFERENCE RIGHT??? AAAAAAAAAA
all of the parts and service room was so cool tbh, all of the creepy old endos and parts, the little fetch easter egg, all of it so so good
the easter eggs in general were really fun, im looking forward to watching this movie be micro analyzed for years to come
the springlock scene 🤌 cinema…..
that scene were william roundhouse kicks mike is just like. so amazing. this is going on the positives. i cant believe they did that. what an amazing movie.
in general the lighting and sound design were very nice (i mean as a layperson i thought they were nice idk XD)
THE SONG WAS IN IT THEY DID THE FUCKING THING 😭👏
negatives
no puppet?
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i feel like this story suffers from the same issue TSE has, where by straying from the games canon you’ve actually made things so much more complicated? while some things definitely made sense (vanessa being williams daughter was a nice touch and made sense for both characters fight me, also a great nod to how shes mind controlled in game canon) others feel like they just made things more complicated? like, why was garrett just a random kid in a random campsite? why was william there, why did he kill him, why do the ghost kids know him? i guess you could say, if there is a reason, it will be revealed in a later movie? but thats so many unnecessary steps when all you had to do was have garret go missing from a freddys location (like in TSE). like, mikes brothers disappearance is linked to freddys, thats why he needs to work there, you could save a lot of time aunt jane ate up. speaking of.
its such a hilarious plot hole that they just totally move past aunt janes death. like this guy is fighting tooth and nail for custody of his sister against his aunt and she shows up dead at his house and nobody is suspicious or cares. also he shows up at the hospital with a stabbed cop who’s apparently in a coma and cant verify his story at all?? the plot armor on this man!!
i realize they needed to put abby in danger at some point or else why would she even be here, but having the ghost kids want to ghostify her doesnt make a whole lotta sense >_> like they kept saying william was confusing them but they never really showed that, golden freddys spirit kid seemed pretty aware of the situation the entire time.
that one jumpscare with the kid with black goopy eyes was pretty silly lmao. feel like they could have captured the creepypasta vibe better
this is semi positive and negative, but i really really liked vanessa’s creepiness i just wish theyd leaned into it a bit more? that scene where shes staring lovingly up at the animatronics and then asks mike to dance is just so 👌 like girl what is wrong with you fr 🥰 but then her behaviors dont make much sense after that, i was a bit confused as to when she was supposed to be trying to get mike to stay and when she was supposed to be warning him away.
the writing in general was definitely a bit weird ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ eh
sorry if my negatives seem like bummers, but i really enjoy picking apart movies i like, and i tend to like things more when there is stuff to pick apart! (sensory fandom experience…..) in general i really enjoyed the movie and i think most fnaf fans will! it’s fun cheesy horror that has a lot of love for the source material without trying to BE it, which wouldn’t be possible anyway
man theres definitely other things i could say but i really have to go to sleep now 😭 gn!!!
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sningo-prompts · 2 years
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so with the sneasel instincts that he has to deal with daily, do you think ingo would eventually get tired of trying to control them, and just let them do whatever for the day? because i can imagine trying to keep control of said instincts every single day would get pretty tiring
I think he only lets go when either alone or with Emmet. Like its a big deal for him to keep them in check. Though they slip when hes very upset or in distress. Its partly why hes so tired all the time. Its probably a lot of work at first till he gets used to his body. That and till hes not like in so much pain. But hes a very disciplined man after his time in Hisui so i think he can manage keeping them in check. Thouuugghhht wouldnt it be fun to see when he slips up. And what he struggles with. Though i dont have many ideas atm. Lol
One urge he has to fight i wanna say is climbing into high places. Idk if its in hisuian sneasel info but i like to think they enjoy being up high. Ingo sees a high place and just ‘i would be safe up there, let me go up there.’
Another im gonna token is clawing things. Does he wanna do it to keep them sharp? Probably. Imagine Emmet catching Ingo clawing something like a tree and gets him something for the apartment. Emmet means well but i bet Ingo hates having to use things specifically made for pokemon. Like stairs for the bed. But he is a pokemon for now and he does feel better after getting the urge to claw out. OR does he wanna claw stuff to mark it? I dont really like this idea very much but i figured i could at least give it to yall lol
Now heres a good one. Midnight egg snacks. Sneasels are known for loving eggs yes? Imagine Ingos brainrot of wanting a raw egg. It probably plagues his mind constantly xD one night he just cant take it anymore and Emmet comes into the kitchen to see Ingo in the fridge. He leaves back and Emmet can see hes got just a raw egg in there. Ingo holds eye contact as he smashes it in his mouth just yo freak Emmet out. Which works. The image will forever haunt Emmet. The sound of a raw egg being being eaten ruins this man. From then on Emmet offers to cook Ingo something egg related. Please for the love of god Ingo let him cook the eggs. Its more for his mental stability than anything else. Ingo 100% teases Emmet about it.
Another one is hiding when he naps. He probably loses out to this one a lot. Hes tired but he has to make sure he doesnt go off to hide somewhere for naps. Causes Emmet a lot of distress when It happens. Plus Ingo doesnt like his bodys hiding spots. Places up high. Under the bed. In the back of the closet. In a cabinet. The laundry basket that one time. Ok i spent like 30minutes looking for the post about that and idk what happened to it. All i know is Ingo makes biscuits like a cat before laying down. Moving on
I had some angsty stuff for this but im so tired i dont think i can remember it. Sorry fam.
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mariska · 11 months
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hello tumblr friends who live in my phone i just wanted to pop in real quick and let everyone know that I Am (somehow) Still Alive since i mentioned being very sick last month and did not want anyone 2 think i had finally Expired. wish i could say i'm doing better this month but while im definitely nowhere near as miserable as i was in April, i've been spending this month trying to deal with Sickness Aftershocks that have been making all of my long term autoimmune diseases/health issues in general flare up randomly really bad at pretty much completely random times and i also have a whole new fun set of similar feeling but definitely different and 100x worse physical health problems and its been extremely difficult to try and power through all of it like i'm used to doing for the 26 years i have been alive 😔 but i'm still hangin in there. idk how at this point lmao. subconscious fight or flight survival mode i guess. i'm like 99% sure i somehow caught one of the new covid mutations in April unfortunately despite the lifelong Agoraphobia and 3+ years of effort i've done to do literally everything in my ability to stay protected against it but. thats life i guess, u leave the house one or two times masked up hand sanitizer ready to go sweating from being overheated wearing clothes that cover as much of ur skin as u can stand and other people just Dont. so. i knew it would probably happen to me eventually i just was really hoping it would not! but. i will continue surviving as best i can because i dont have any other option or choice. but that is why i've unintentionally been distant here and online in general. it was already extremely difficult getting myself out of bed and taling showers and changing clothes and brushing my teeth and remembering to eat food and drink water before but now its reached a difficulty that i literally can't have any control over most of the time and its a lot of physical/mental/emotional effort to even tap reblog on a post online or respond to a text more so than it was previously. which again was already. very difficult to power through.
anyways! uh! yeah. life update i guess. i hope you guys are genuinely doing much better than i am this year and i hope you're all able to stay safe and as relatively healthy as you can. and please please please please at the very least wear some form of a face mask in public even if you're outside and not in a tiny building. i dont say that to shame anyone here i just feel like there are a lot of well meaning good people who arent fully aware that in the US at least the pandemic is very much not over and people like myself are suffering and dying because of that and we cant be the only group of people that are still doing our best to stay protected when we have to leave the house. if you're able to get some i highly recommend N95 type face masks because supposedly they offer one of the best chances of protection as long as you're wearing it correctly and it fits your face well; there's a really great non-profit organization called Project N95 that has an official website and a huge list of various face masks in a bunch of different sizes and types to order if you don't know where to find some high quality ones and they also have a form you can fill out and submit to request an order of free masks if you can't afford to buy them; their money donation pool goes towards providing masks (and some air purifiers i think?) to low income people/organizations/work places that doesn't have the funds or resources to constantly buy expensive batches of masks and their website is super detailed and well organized and has a long list of visual and written resources and information about different mask types, ways you can help keep yourself/your community safe, etc. so i highly recommend them if you are like me and are very stressed and anxious and confused about all of that information all the time. their site should be the at the top of the search results if you google N95 Project, it has a dot org site url so thats another way you can tell its the official site.
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seaquestions · 2 years
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i have like. aimlessly monologued so much abt dark souls just pacing around my apartment. its 5am and i just cant shut up about it. LIKE. i knooowww that people have been going on about it for like eleven years now and im sure none of these thoughts are original but i wanna ramble!!! ramblings under readmore!!!!
this game is good man, its so good. the tone and atmosphere most of all. i think cos its y’know its melancholic and quiet and lonely but it’s also so whimsical and funny and silly. i find a man in the sewers trapped in a pickling jar and roll into it to get him out. when i talk to him later i find that he’s this really genuine, kind-hearted guy. i roll into this fortress full of death traps and a snake man turns to look at me and then suddenly a boulder comes outta nowhere to run over him and it’s like i’m in a goddamn looney toon. the colour palettes of the environments is quite colourful actually, it’s within a certain range of tones but it’s not like it’s a depressing game to look at. it’s not that bleak. it’s not grimdark, it’s not edgy. it’s fun!
like, really. it’s such a fun game! i already knew i was gonna love the world of dark souls, the environments and the npcs, i just needed the gameplay to be something i can work with. and it is, and even more than that, it clicked with me. somehow i didn’t expect the combat in dark souls to be so fun, but like, that’s a big draw of the game. it’s very fun to fight in dark souls. there’s something to it that just feels really good. i think the enemy placement factors into the rhythm of combat quite a fair bit actually, and it’s typically well done. and i think another thing that’s great is how much control you have over the pace of combat. there’s a push and pull with the game as it throws challenges at you and tests your limits of course but you get to dictate quite a fair bit about the way you face these challenges.
something i enjoyed the most i think is like, not even within the game. so like after fighting the taurus demon and the gaping dragon for the first few times and dying, i ended my gaming session and like. couldnt stop thinking abt the fight and ended up thinking about what to do next time i fought them. which ik is nothing but i’m a really simple guy okay, i don’t strategise usually. but i wanted to beat them and move on to the next parts of the game, and so it made me think about the tools that were at my disposal that the game gave me and like - i think that’s great! successful game design bit. idk, it’s prolly not that big of a deal but it felt really good when i went back to the gaping dragon with A Plan, and executed on it flawlessly.
man.. ive just been having a lot of fun that i kinda didn’t ever expect to have. im feeling like i fell in love. like i thought it’d be impossible for me so i never played it but it turned out to be such an enjoyable experience so far. i dont even care if like…. i come across and bit thats too hard and i might give up forever i still had a lot of fun and it was worth it but i believe in myself man!!! i wanna finish this game forreal and that means a lot coming from a guy who like never finishes anything ever. ima just keep on trucking babey. if you die seven times and get up eight it’s not a matter of life and death its about your will and the barriers in front of you and whichever one will break first or uhhhh however that line from that vaatividya video goes. and like it’s not for everybody (there’s uhhh no map. i thankfully am good with creating mental maps but if you are not this game will be a much less fun time) but idk man……….ultimate game of all time is fuckin right actually…………. anyway………. im a changed man now……..gootbye……
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torchsart · 4 months
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hey do u guys remember greyson? i forgot to post him for some reason im sorry man
facts below the cut but also. i have comms open
basic info
his birthday is march 28th!
he is korean-american
omnisexual with a stronger attraction toward men
full time livestreamer, primarily plays video games & interacts with his fanbase. mostly plays cozy games, horror games, rpgs, and tons of dating sims
adores bright, vibrant colors with preferences for red, yellow, and green, but dresses plainly when going outside to avoid standing out too much. always wears gloves
always has at least the top half of his face covered so no one knows what his eyes look like. collects masks and favors his calico mask
wanted to be a street magician as a kid and practiced sleight of hand for years, becoming extremely skilled at slipping items away from people without them noticing
upon performing in public for the first time, he discovered he likes sneaking away items much more than giving them back. he now uses his skills to nab small items and trinkets he finds interesting, usually things like family photos and random receipts
personality
excitable & energetic, but slacks off if its not something he has much interest in. reluctantly gets things done only by the power of complaining the whole time. mischievous, likes bending rules and finding loopholes
commits to the bit hard, to the point jokes & real facts about him blur together. once did a livestream claiming to be drinking chocolate milk for the first time. there are wikis and discussions dedicated to separating bits from facts
has a running bit where he presents stolen goods under the guise of playing a thief whos really bad at lying. this is his most obvious bit, so no one knows he actually did steal most of the things he shows off
thinks dantes is justified in fighting ppl if they dont have the self control to just Not get into petty fistfights (is it Really that hard Not to fight strangers?)
biggest love language is touch! if hes fond of someone he Will find a way to be in physical contact with them, whether its a hug, hand on the shoulder, or standing awkwardly close
he also likes giving gifts & spending time with his loved ones whenever possible :)
hobbies & interests
loves coffee but needs it heavily flavored with various sweet syrups. prefers to make it at home. has tried and doesnt like dantes teas
often shoplifts despite having enough money for most things he wants & makes a game out of seeing what the most absurd thing he can walk out with is. has managed to steal a watermelon with a baby stroller
builds his own pcs! likes watching tech restoration videos & learning how to take apart consoles for repair
not a speedrunner himself but loves watching them, fascinated by game bugs & glitches & how speedrunners work with or around them
notably does not like particularly challenging games. hates getting stuck on parts in case the audience gets bored & prefers games that dont require much focus so he can engage with chat. difficult games simply arent fun for him
this is the kinda guy you can buy any cat related thing for & he will absolutely love it. doesnt even matter if its a cat themed item for him or smth For his cat, hes ecstatic
any games made by huge corporations are pirated but he loves supporting small devs 👍
misc trivia
besties & housemates with dante! roots for him in his fights & thinks hes very interesting
trying to get dante into gaming, has only gotten him to play monster prom Once (dantes fav was damien)
loves to annoy dante, especially by sending him memes at work (dante secretly appreciates it)
has a rescue calico named "oh my goshua" but calls him gosh for short
fav monprom date is scott howl
fav ac villagers are ribbot & stitches
cant decide if he likes redd the fox or hates him
fav slime rancher slimes are tabby & lucky
fav pokemon are nickit & purrloin
wants to adopt alistair & arven
simps for raihan, wulfric, grusha, & several others
fav stardew bachelors are sebastian & harvey
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lostacelonnie · 6 months
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Surviving is one thing but befriending the alt girls? Now thats thriving congrats on the friend acquisition. Oh yeah absolutely thats super cool of your mom. To be so chill. More parents should aspire to be so chill. Birds are just chill dudes who exist & you can see them & its great. Fuck gulls though. They're nice to look at but will be bastards if you have food in some places. Ive been trying to learn german here & there and it is. Something. Mood but for english. Who needs grammer rules fuck em. I dont know polish so i definitely cant say. You probably mentioned it that sounds familiar but dang. Well it at least wont be as bad? My joke answer is gay sex would be less gay than whatever bronya/seele & march/stelle have goin on. My serious answer is that but also that was really well paced & written. Svarog my bro. Love him. Cocolia confrontation had killer music & the interaction with preservation was cool too. Love fire stelle abilities. Mobile is tough but just gotta fuck it we ball through it. Ill definitely have to add rain world to my list. Dredge is like. Lovecraftian horror fishing sim. Its really neat. River city girls is a simple beat em up adventure game where you fight through town doin little quests on your way through the main one. Real fun easy controls & the soundtrack is real good. Please do id love to hear your exploits. Yeah i have work a lot & so does she plus her kids so i dont talk to mine much either. Im getting to the point in star rail where i am catching up like genshin so ill probably log in less on that too unless more story happens or an event catches my eye. After next planet story anyways. Im not far enough in simulated universe to do swarm disaster sadly. Just gotta. Level them characters as usual. Ps5 star rail gave me gepard which he's good but like. I want bronya
YEAH ITS GREAT and thank you!! we have different groups this year and im very happy ab this bc most of the popular girls im scared of that i shared a group with last year are in the other one now. so im chillen. yeah shes VERY epic hehehehe!!!!! love her. YEAH frfr i agree.... ab the gulls as well i almost got Physically Attacked by one when i was on a trip on an island near alicante cos i was hanging out in the sea and went towards a small island not far away from the shore. not knowing there was a gull nest on it. but i took the hint when one started Screaming at me like halfway through. god i am scared of these things. theyre cool but from a safe distance. and ahhh good luck with learning german!! i took 4 years of it in primary school and still dont know a thing. but its a very charming language so maybe when i get a solid hang of spanish, ill revisit it. tho it Is funny to joke with my friends ab how i didnt allow ppl to germanize me. german was mandatory under the nazi occupation and theres this one patriotic song with the lines "nie będzie niemiec pluł nam w twarz / ni dzieci nam germanił" [the german will not spit in our face / nor germanize our children] but these days its often used for jokes ab having to learn the language. and yeah i suppose thats true!! it is what it is. anyway. YEAH i actually agree with both the joking and serious part andkfnjjb ESPECIALLY the cocolia boss fight. GOD that was cool. i honestly dont use fire trailblazer abilities that much but yes she does come in handy. good luck with surviving on mobile o7 also keep me updated if you do end up playing it!!!!!! its unbelievably hard but like. in a good way. OOH BOTH OF THESE SOUND VERY FUN!! speaking of which i have so many games i wanna play..... but i literally just spent around 200zł [a bit under 46 dollars] two days ago [wait im gonna tell you how in a second]. which actually connects to dye update: i redid my hair since it washed off pretty quickly [but ah i look so nice in red] for the very event i ended up spending way too much money on. and yeah fair rn im actually going onto genshin more often than star rail bc the fontaine exploration + catching up on sumeru exploration is just. So fun. havent played swarm disaster yet either...... no time...... i have a Lot of stuff to do for school recently. its been like what. 2 weeks. and we already finished the first chapter from history and were gonna have an exam soon. which im Dreading btw bc for some reason i went for extended history in school despite being physically unable to remember dates. but hey at least extended geography is easy [so far]. so fuck it we ball. anyway ah congrats on getting gepard!!! hes pretty overpowered yeah but i want bronya as well [i say barely ever logging into the game]. which is pretty funny bc i already got 3 5* things on standard in star rail while being like 150 pulls in and they were two claras and GEPARDS LIGHTCONE. which i cant even use on march since i run her in clara teams in which i need the taunt on clara. Lol. but whatever. ANYWAY ABOUT THE EVENT uhhh you Might recall that i went to like a. con-adjacent thing last year. its actually just mainly for buying merch but a Lot of people go in cosplays. anyway i went this year as well and got a bunch of prints [of focalors, fischl, signora, silver wolf, kafka, and miku], and some other stuff [charms of himeko starrail, silver wolf, and kafka, as well as bronya honkaiimpact3rd and kafka pins]. and a very cute choker. so YEAH for the sheer amount of stuff i got id say its a very good price but i still feel bad ab spending so much money in one go sjdkgkgjh
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rainbowgothdisaster · 10 months
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important note: this could all be very assumptionous, but botw i fell in love with right away. it broke away from typical zelda games which was fun bcuz i only played the 3ds remake of ocarina of time and never finished it. totk feels like it tried to be more zelda game in the worst ways. so the disappointment is hitting hard and since my brother didnt finish botw i cant discuss it with him.
so glad i didnt buy totk
im borrowing my brothers. its............... fine. i guess. not
the music is worse, the story is too intrusive, switching some controls is irritating for someone who played botw at least 5 times in the last 2-3 years, i forget about these abilities more than i forgot about cyonis, idk why but travelling feels more irritating? why would i need my horse or walk when its just. idk. is it slower than before?, i feel like im losing health and stamina more but maybe im just too used to knowing how to manage it, i feel like i dont naturally make rupees and pick up materials as much as before like i have to go out of my way doing that, i dont find the zonai archetecture interesting in anyway its so bland, i feel like basic things that i used my eyes and brain for are being explained which. shut up., im not as sticky as i used to be im so demotivated from climbing
if it can import my horses why cant it know i know how to do stuff in the previous game? or why not have an option to turn off like parry and archery tutorials? if theres one way to make me put down a game its treat me like an idiot.
maybe im not far enough but i do not care for the new characters ive seen so far, theyre endearing in the basic way of "this is a child and has a cute design" but not very much in actual personality. its a cluttered cast, before i was here for zelda and made friends along the way and reconnected with old ones. this time i already have friends that would be fun to work with more closely but instead they pointed me to who im working with.
i dont feel as strong a connection with these sages as i did the champions. the champions i was heart broken bcuz imagine your friends all die you fail your mission and then you fucking die and wake up 100yrs later everyone youve ever known dead (and tbh anyone you cared about died just before you, except for The Person and you were fighting the odds with a tooth pick and white girl in a nightdress there is no way he actually thought hed get away), a faint memory in history, and you can barely remember them but are one of less than a handful of ppl that know them as a person instead of an ancient hero. 100 years is just 1-3 generations and yet its all so distant. i had reason to care for them from the get go. ive met the sage of wind and was just kinda. bored. these ppl are ancient and not mine and my connection is on a new person who i cant actually make memories with to make boss fights more dramatic.
maybe im just salty bcuz i thought teba and his friend was hot (i spent so much time in rito village guys, everyone liked sidon i was on teba (and the champions i thirsted for them so so much esp daruk and revali)) and they just pointed at tulin like "take this, it could help you on your adventure"
the puzzels are more intuitive and interesting, theres more characterization for previous characters and voice acting, everyone is so much hotter, uh zonai are sexy as hell???, zelda. babygirl. what are you trying to do to me with this makeup?, ive only come across two but i like taking the koroks to where they need to go :3 he go camping wit fwiend :3, i love the foreboding shadow child, fun boss fight, im not motion sick during the dungeons
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genuin1 · 10 months
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i have so many thoughts about genloss as a show hold on HOLD ON !!!!!!!!!!!!
OKAY SO. its really been growing on me as a series recently as all this commentary content comes out which may be a surprise because i was losing my mind over it when it first came out but it wasn’t really what i. expected 
like especially the first episode, i still enjoyed it and wasn’t disappointed because i knew the horror aspect was going to develop but it very much differed from what id seen in the promos, general discussions about it beforehand, the content warnings, etc. so i was a bit caught off guard
BUT!!! as i watch these commentary videos where people that were involved in the project talk about it or just people react to it i have a newfound appreciation for the silliness of the first episode. like some of the awkward moments i now think are so funny and i appreciate the improv a lot more because that is DIFFICULT to keep up for a long time. i do wish it was a little bit more structured though and had more of a sense that the characters knew what to say
its like i understand that the people behind the project wanted some moments to just be so stupid and so i love some of the stupid moments now because theyre just silly when before they sort of took me out of the moment 
and the second episode has grown on me SO MUCH. beforehand i mostly enjoyed it because of the reveals in it but i genuinely love especially the second half so much because it’s so silly and so fun and especially austin does such a good job at the end with his character being such a contrast to sneeg and ranboo to make it. less silly. (more harrowing)
like yes i still have some criticisms about it in terms of pacing and stuff which is why im so excited for the founders cut but with the vods themselves ive developed an even greater appreciation and especially seeing how much the cast and crew loved working on the project i enjoy it even more 
i definitely think it requires a certain silly sense of humor to enjoy it fully. like you cant go into it fully serious. some shit is just so dumb like what the fuck do you mean an entire rubber chicken was extracted from charlie’s stomach in the surgery scene. wdym ranboos character is just so constantly confused take a shot everytime they say “i dont know” youll die of alcohol poisoning 
BUT also ranboo, although their improv in the first episode is a liiiittle bit awkward does such a good job with little moments like when their mask blinks during the charlie fight scene they mumble like “why can’t i-” or “how do i get out of here-” and that just SO COOL TO ME 
and through the sometimes awkward acting those moments just BUILD and they crescendo to the final scene that is such a gut punch and so horrifying. its so different to how we’ve seen the characters act
the overarching story is genuinely so fucking sad and terrifying and the way everything is developed is so well done to me. that third episode is such a fucking opposite to what we’ve been seeing and that’s what makes it so entertaining
like ranboo in the show expresses distress during some parts but never to the extent that the situation would warrant because hes not ALLOWED to. only when his life is being voted on are they allowed to have control over themselves and have a well deserved breakdown. their only chance to remember who they are is given when it is moments from being ripped away 
god i love this story so much 
i am so excited to see where the other generations will go because ranboo is genuinely such a talented writer and is so creative and has such a good ability to show off their vision i know its going to be so cool. 
i love being a genloser!!!!!!
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dumbbitchfrommars · 1 year
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i really wonder what the context was of my last post. cause if it was about the girl who had a crush on me thats unfortunate. but if its someone else im gagged. im such a baddie. idk. idk. i think recently ive been in such a defensive state. like im waiting for something bad to happen at the hands of another person, and im expecting the absolute worst from them. i want to see the best but i also dont want to get hurt. i dont know where this stemmed from. i guess my people pleasing has gotten out of hand, because it hasnt been succeeding. 
my job is kind lowering my vibration beyond repair. i weirdly enjoy it though? i dont know. i must be too in my masculine. and of course, completely disconnected from my spirit and higher self. i cant bring myself to talk to my sister cause i know we will only trigger eachother. 
so here i am. sitting in the silence. tired of it all. 
i cant even bring myself to physically write in my journal. and working out isnt as meditative as it used to be. though im so glad i can still get my ass up and do it. its not as fun and exciting. i kinda feel guilty for sexualising myself and loving my own body. literally, yesterday i was trying to force myself to be comfortable with my skin out, that i ruined my opportunity for a relaxing walk. the entire time i was self conscious and felt like the entire world was watching me. completely uncomfortable. 
my anxiety is in a rough period at the moment. i dont even smoke weed anymore. that used to be such a spiritual practice for me and now im afraid of it. im kinda afraid of everything. especially people. 
its weird, because i seem like i love people. i tell myself im good because i am so social at work, and i perform well and i connect with customers. but in reality, i cant hold onto any kind of relationship. if i do it has to be superficial or im uncomfortable. 
i think if i shifted my focus to the good things about the relationships i do have, and the things that make me happy and comfortable and at peace, these issues im creating wont seem so huge anymore. its always like that. i should talk to my psych about all of this. i need to see her... i cant believe its been so long. like, my fucking dogs died. they both fucking died. 
they contributed to my focus on isolation at the moment. i suddenly had the ground pulled from beneath me. they were my stability and my safety. now i feel so alone, at my core, that its all i can think about. its made me realise how short life is and how quickly things can change and slowly everyone is slipping away... when i pushed them out. i forced them to leave. theyre barely even leaving when we were nothing to begin with. 
i get the feeling ive said all of this a million times before. it never really changes. 
i feel like im a really driven and motivated person. i am smart and self controlled, and responsible, and im good at the things i try my best at. im gifted. but at the same time, i cant change the things about me that cause me the most stress and worry. i am stuck. i have been stuck, for so, so long. im tired of it. im so TIRED. 
this loneliness is comforting. its healing in a way, cause i can avoid all the drama and stress of attempting to tell anyone how i am feeling. but that in itself is so fucking pathetic and toxic and weak. its like, i failed at the most fundamental human thing. communicating. connecting with others. creating a community. 
maybe one day someone will piss e off enough that i blow up on everyone. why does the idea of that bring me so much relief? 
i cant even bother myself to consider spiritual practice right now. oh im stuck in the past and its holding me back from opportunities and the blessings from the universe? bitch, im trying to fight depression! who gives a fuck about opportunities right now?! i have nothing to fucking live for besides europe. thats so pathetic. i need to get my head right again because this is such a huge mess. im under so much pressure. i have no time. time, time, time, time. 
i need to be more social, i need to be more this and that. its a fucking exhausting thing to be in my mind right now. where did all the love go? it literally died with them. grief is consuming me. i cant pause life but its consuming me and im trying to pretend to be happy but im also trying to find the happiness again but its gone. they took it with them into the afterlife. or just into the fucking ground. 
it poured so heavily today and my heart hurt with the anxiety i felt that you were cold and alone out there. that you were getting wet and without cover. why does it keep on raining? youll be so cold. i remember you laid in the rain the night before you died because you could barely move or notice it was happening. my poor babies. i miss you so much. 
this is why ive been avoiding planning my birthday like a fucking plague, like a fucking disease. how can i even think about celebrating my life when yours have ended? to even celebrate without you? its too painful. i cant pretend like this anymore. but of course ill keep on acting like im fine. its the only way. i fucking hate this world. 
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lzffyarchive · 3 years
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lol
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ninjasmudge · 2 years
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Yes hi would love to hear about your Rumbie and Savvie head canons please!
(Also - love that Macaque was fully ready for that single dad life until he saw one of the kids using Wukong's powers and just went "fuck this one's my ex's kid ain't it")
sksjsjsjjdnks ok so this was an au based solely on the idea of macaque and swk trying desperately to teach two super powered toddlers to control their powers
basically the premise of this was what i already mentioned,
• maq has too much left over power from stealing swks and then a boost from lbd, and his body gets rid of it by pouring it into the next two clones he makes which turn out as rumble and savage
• im still calling them these names because 1. i dont want them to be confused with other peoples versions of these characters and 2. im desensitised to weird names from the tf fandom)
• rumble and savage are sisters in this au- because they were created to get rid of excess power, theyre kind of op and havent learnt to control it like swk did.
• savage has gold eyes and powers, she can mimic a lot of the powers of swk and macaque, but when she uses shadows they are shimmery gold instead of purple like macaques are. she also has sun wukongs lazer eyes and can summon a cloud but cant use it.
• rumble has blue eyes cause she has lbds powers mixed with macaques which you can imagine gives her a bit of a complex. she has ice manipulation and the ability to look through anothers eyes instead of fully possessing them, but she can speak directly into peoples minds as well as a bunch of macaques powers, the same as her sister. she doesnt fully understand why they came to see sun wukong, who can help with her sisters powers, but arent going to see someone to help her control her own powers.
• the actual story to this was that while macaque was working under lbd, he had the twins and lbd was going to kill them outright because she has a plan damnit and this was not part of it so macaque took the opportunity to blow up part of her mech and RUN with them.
• he was pretty badly hurt during the fight before they escaped though, and by the time theyd got far enough to slow down, he was a little delirious with fever. he didn't know where to go but his brain was going 'these are baby monkeys. baby monkeys go to the nurseries on flower fruit so theyre safe' because when he used to live on flower fruit, baby monkeys were all over the place but if there was danger, there were certain places on the island specifically so they could hide.
• theyre out on their own for a couple of weeks and, semi lucid, macaque leads them to flower fruit and basically passes out on the way up to swks house.
• fun thing about this tho is swks not home! hes been out for months with the crew doing i didnt know what (s3 hadnt dropped) so its not until like a day of them being there that swk comes back, bc he felt like something was wrong.
• havent nailed down exactly what happens when swk gets back but after a confrontaion, it becomes clear that macaque definatly needs help because hes still pretty injured despite rumble and savage doing their best to patch him up
• and also because rumble already iced him once while they were on the run and it freaked him out pretty bad because he thought lbd had found them, and savage destroyed one of their hiding spots by accident
thats all ive got for now and i dont have a name for it yet but sjhdsfdffsh i really like this concept it kind of reminds me of like xmen or something and comedy potential is a lot of fun
156 notes · View notes
delicrieux · 3 years
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—MAKE YOU SAY “OH” EXTRAS: TINDER
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extra meaning non-canonical occurrence; can be placed anywhere in the “make you say oh” timeline after couple (cha. 14) and before the final “oh”. 
pairing—corpse husband x f!reader warnings—tinder profiles, tw: men, swearing.  word count—2.6k. format— written. ─── ❥ req by nonnie​:  y/n makes a youtube vid/live stream where she's just swiping through her tinder acc and corpse literally blocks her lmao
author’s note—akldsljfs this was such a funny idea i could not not write it lmao
ultimate masterlist. myso masterlist
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You have pulled the biggest brain move by setting up both a facecam and a screen recorder on your phone. All is beautifully displayed and visible during the stream. Your fanbase is particularly intrigued on what exactly are you planning on doing today, seeing as your tweet of “strea” had been a bit vague, if not downright ominous. No emojis. No elaboration. You couldn’t even be bothered to finish the word. Truly, a mystery. Everyone tuned in and are currently waiting with bated breath.
A few of your fans must sense upcoming doom because the overall mood in the chat turns from optimistically intrigued to...evil. It’s an entity all on it’s own now, clawing at you through the screen with various renditions of laughter and devil emojis. A few eggplants thrown in there for good measure, accompanied, naturally, by the scandalous water drops. At first the common consensus is that you’re biting the bullet and going through your camera roll on stream. Definitely an idea worth considering, though you frankly don’t know what lies at the start of the 11k photograph journey, and you are afraid to check in public. Could be a harmless meme, could be a salacious pic you had saved of an OF star. It’s really a gamble. Either way, you would definitely get banned. You might still get banned. Why do you insist on doing shit like this?
Because it’s funny. Because you’re kinda stupid. Because it’s just so absolutely laughably easy to do.
A smile quirks your lips, and while it is not explicitly smug, the look in your eyes sure is, “Greetings,” You utter lowly, dimming the lights--the budget for this stream! Ugh, you went all out, “my children.”
mother i crave violence
sensing evil energy rn!!
i do not claim the energy in this video for myself or anyone else watching this 💖💖
^with peace and love shut the fuck up
“I know y’all lowkey hoes-” Upon your words the chat splits into two: one side eagerly agrees (even shares a few OF accounts! How helpful, supporting small businesses!), whilst the other feverishly insists on innocence. You make a face stuck somewhere between offended and bewildered, “Now c'mon now-I know you. I know you all. We’re the same, don’t-what was that?”
You try to scroll back to the comment but it’s loss in the sea of incoming messages, “I swear to God I just saw-”
Corpse_Husband: i love late night streams it’s not like i have anything better to do.
“COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORPSE!!!!” 
rip headphone users
i cant feel my face when im with you by the weeknd but instead of face its my fucking ears
yall think full vol on pc is better?my parents woke up 😭😭😭😭
To think he’s spending his last waking moments for today with watching you (he probably still would have anyway, because you do not posses an ounce of shame or self-control and pester him relentlessly)! It makes your heart sing, and suddenly, a traitorous, fun hating idea barges it’s way through the crowd of incoherent buzzing and states: don’t do this. For some reason it also has the voice of Rae. As if that would work in guilt-tripping you- Rae never succeed, and her fictitious rendition in mind won’t fare much better either.
Still, you thought about it. That must count for something. Corpse will understand, won’t he? Why don’t you want to upset it in the first place? Men look so funny when they lose their shit, like hello, don’t you have anything better to do? But the image of Corpse just sitting there, hurt, distraught, leaving you on seen because he’s in his sad boy hours leaves a sour taste in your mouth. 
queen rly went from  🥺😊 to 😕 u ok bbgirl?
Corpse_Husband: no pouts cutie
akjdjoeijdfse cUTIE??? deadass boutta r.i.p.
Well that succeeded in eliminating everything from mind, doubts included. If this was an anime, the scenery would shift into something roseate, with flowers and bubbles and sparkles all around you along with a halo or two. Alas, not an anime, rather reality. The led-lights, however, seemingly possessing a will of their own, slowly turn from deep violet to pink. You smile brightly, like the absolute dumbass you are, and you are met with a ray of heart and blushing emojis. You are just so cute, a real cutie! Still in your disguise adorable state, you swipe your finger on your phone screen, the grin never leaving your lips.
There, among the plethora of apps, nestled sits a red square with a white fire plastered on it. The delicate calligraphy on the bottom reads: TINDER.
The mood changes once again- you’re giving the roaches emotional instability by how quickly everything flips over- and the chat spams eggplants vigorously; some, of course, bravely fight against the thirst.
nooooooo i thought y/n is gonna stream in a god honoring way!!!
^pack it up girl defined
“So, Charlie and I-” You note a few awfully curious comments and squint, “-yes, we talk a lot. Charlie is a really good friend of mine. We’re best friends. Brothers. Sisters. Cousins. The whole fucking family tree-no, that sounds weird. Delete. Anyway, Charlie, being the absolute fucker he is, said, hey, you know what would be funny? And I was like, nooo, what would be funny, Charlie? And he says to me, he says, says, making fun of men on Tinder. And if y’all need any more proof that Charlie and I are platonic soulmates, then dunno, my children, my roaches, I dunno-I dunno what more to give you.”
You can’t be bothered reading the comments, there’s too damn many. You also need to save your reading comprehension for the actual bios. It has a time limit, that darn thing. 
“Okay, so I made a profile earlier, but I hadn’t swiped on anyone yet-” Despite the fact, Tinder helpfully informs you that already 99+ people have swiped right on you, “So, this is me,” You show the pictures you have of yourself, and damn, not to be a conceited narcissist, but you look really good. Like if you saw yourself on Tinder, you’d super like instantly. “Uhm, so, my bio-my bio says: let’s sauce in the tub together, ya dig? splishy splashy, giggle giggle.” 
i cant believe we are witnessing y/n trying to form a coherent sentence live 
shes trying give her time
ya dig??? y not capeesh
what scene from the godfather is this lol?
“My anthem, is,” You laugh, covering your lips with your hand, “Corpsie, this is form you-” Proudly, you show that indeed, Corpse’s E-GIRLS ARE RUINING MY FUCKING LIFE is listed as your anthem on Spotify, “Hehe.” Yes, you say that aloud.
Corpse_Husband: you’re killing me Corpse_Husband: thanks baby Corpse_Husband: now delete tinder ❤︎
You ignore his last quip, deciding it’s finally time to get this show on the road, “Right, let’s do this shit. I’m not actually going to swipe on any guys that look, uh, decent? Yuck, can’t believe I just said that, uhm, because I-because I feel like some actually deserve a chance with someone? I don’t wanna get anyone’s hopes up, as I am currently in a long distance relationship with Chrollo. So I’m just gonna swipe on, like, frat boy assholes. Because I don’t care if I hurt their feelings. Quite frankly I don’t think they possess them in the first place.”
The chat voices their agreements. With the ground rules set, you, giddy, click on the first profile.
Does Tinder know what you’re doing, your plan? The FBI agent watching you through your phone must be working overtime, bless his heart. They must, because the the first guy to meet you is named Jason, and there he is, blond hair and blue eyes, holding up a fish the size of his torso. Marginally adequate in looks, pretty good muscles. A solid 7 bordering on 8. He’s the same age as you, 15 miles away, and he studies at some college you don’t care enough to look up. Bio reads:
I like to drive fast. Fishing is my passion, but if you can’t catch me by the ocean, you’ll catch me catching waves, bro! Love a good gym date. You do squats, and I’ll keep a close eye to make sure you’re doing it correctly ;) You probably saw me at a party. Leader of the The Phi Kappa Psi. I’m a Gemini, if that matters lol.
You, of course, read it aloud, dramatically; provide some constructive criticism-he seems nice, but he’s a Gemini, so naturally, you can’t trust him at all! Also, that gym date session leaves little to be desired. With your rant done, you swipe right, and shocker! (not), it’s an instant match.
“Okie, I still wanna swipe of some profiles, so I’ll see what he’ll text later-” For a second you wonder the legalities of this stream, but you’re having too much fun to think of it further, “guys, I won't get sued, right?”
NOW she considers it
well....
if you do, we’ll kickstart your lawyer dw <3
Onto the next profile. Kevin, 25, is seen fixing his car- or, you assume he’s mid-fixing it, you don’t really know why else he’d hold a wrench and be covered in oil. He’s shirtless, and the caveman part of your brain echoes something closely resembling AWOOOGA!, but...but!...blonde hair, blue eyes. You pout again, “I don’t...I don’t really like blond boys, ya know? With the blue eyes and all, it’s just not my thing, uhm, unless it’s like-like...Armin from Attack on Titan. Else I don’t care.”
Onto the bio:
You have to treat a car like you treat a woman: go on long rides, take the lead, but most importantly, keep her oiled up �� 
“What the fuck did I just read?”
The chat is equally confused. You swipe right anyway- another match. Too easy.
The stream continues without incident for a solid thirty minutes- all of your matches, expect a few that genuinely looked like normal dudes that really couldn’t write a decent bio to save their lives, had been blond hair blue eyed gym rats with ranging forms of misogyny. Some opened with asking for nudes out right, some asked about your day first before asking for nudes. You prefer the former. Straight to the point! You admire the gall. 
But then, down the forty-five minute mark a profile popped up that made you still by your phone, your smile dying as your eyes bulged. Dear God. Lord in heaven. Who is this demonspiit lookalike and why is he so fucking hot? The neck tats, the skateboard, the clothes- holy shit, you gotta close your mouth before some drool dribbles out.
No bio, just his name, Tyler, and that he’s 23.
“He boutta be 23 in me.” You mutter, swiping right with lightning speed.
WHAT DID SHE SAYYYYY?????????
tyler is y/ns karma for relentlessly mocking that one guy that had a whole ass list on what his “female” partner should be
^he deserved it and also tyler seems like a typical fuckboi y/n grow a braincell
look at mom 🥺 her eyes are sparkling
It wasn’t a match right away. You somehow expected as much, but it still upset you. Simp behavior, pathetic. The stream continued bravely, and when Tyler messaged you a simple “yo” you totally didn’t sequel. You didn’t manage to text him back on stream: texting all those guys that you didn’t really find all that attractive was easy, but this...You’re a sucker for a man who radiates red flag energy. His whole profile is a red flag. He might just be a red flag himself.
What can you do? Suddenly becoming color blind is not easy. Once the stream ends, you unmatch with everyone expect Tyler. He you chat with for a bit, but a sudden craving for different company makes you abandon him, too. You don’t feel too heartbroken for him- you’re certain there’s already too many girls in his dms. You wish them luck.
Happily, you delete Tinder. You go to Twitter, notice you’re trending again- look at you go! Queen shit- and as you compose a thank you tweet, something strange happens. You go to text Corpse, but when you click on his profile you grow cold.
YOU’RE BLOCKED. You can’t follow or see @/Corpse_Husband ‘s Tweets. 
...Pardon? You hop onto Instragram and-also blocked. Seriously? And you thought you’re one petty bitch. Corpse is seriously prissy about everything. Damn, if he didn’t like your stream, he could’ve just said so. Didn’t need to, like, block you from his internet existence. So not cool.
You try texting him but no text go through. Well how will you let him know you deleted Tinder just like he asked? You relieve your frustrations by punching your pillow a few times. Later, you apologize to her, you didn’t mean to hurt her, it’s not her, it’s you. Fuck, 5 minutes of exile and you’re already loosing your mind.
“Raeeeeeeeeeeee!” You whine loudly. It’s roughly 2am now, but you don’t care. You’re too heartbroken to care. There’s a thump from her room, but nothing else, “Raeeeeeeeee!!!” You wail, wallowing in self-pity on your bed. You hear a very loud, very annoyed sigh from her room, followed by angry marching. Your door is abruptly thrown open, and in the dim, colorful light you see her scowl.
“What?” She grits.
“Can you please tell Corpse to unblock me from everything?”
“What did you do now?”
“I made fun of men on Tinder.”
She pauses, “...That doesn’t sound so bad.” She surmises, voice laced with suspicion, “What else?”
“...There was one really hot guy that I kinda sorta talked to after--”
“Y/n.”
“-But I totally deleted Tinder and honestly he was pretty boring, so, like, uhm, please?”
She sighs, the servery of which implies she is holding the weight of the world on her shoulders, and instantly you know that you won. She taps away at her phone, “You owe me one.” She states, and before you can reply, she exits your room and slams the door behind her.
Grinning, you text his phone again. The message goes through, oh gosh, you’re so relieved you feel like crying. This has been, officially, the worst five minutes of your life.
You Y DID U BLOCK ME LOSER!!! MAJOR LOSER ALERT!! I DELETED EVERYTHING IT WAS A JOKE r u still mad at me? y u always mad at me i never do anything:(
my husband You’re my baby, how do you think I’ll react when I see you publicly simping for some asshole on Tinder?
Oh no, he used the words, he delivered the killing blow. You’re finished. Your heart can’t take such a workout. 
Not that you would ever admit it to him, though!
You hehe ur jellyyyy u always dis jealous hehe?
my husband Not jealous.
Yeah, you might not be the brightest tool in the shed, but even you know that’s a lie. You send him an array of kissy emojis that he doesn’t have the decency to reply to. Then, completely unprompted and dead serious, you send him a simple voice memo, saying: “You really have nothing to worry about, you know? You’re my favorite, Corpsie.”
He responds via text, reiterating that he’s not fucking jealous and that he just doesn’t like when you show such outward interest in anyone but it’s not like he cares or anything. It’s just really, like, weeeeird to see his baby simping for another man like that totally ruins the whole dynamic!!! It was only natural that he should block you on every social media platform, including his personal number (which, like, was completely necessary! Doesn’t matter that his viewers can’t see it, it’s gotta be super believable!), and inform his followers of that, because it’s all a joke, like, for the dynamic, that Youtube grind, you know? Ya dig? No personal feelings were involved at all. He totally wasn’t upset that you found someone else cute, no way!
my husband I’m not jealous. Lol.
You ik u repeated tht like 50 times  u trynna convince me or??? lmao
my husband No comment. ...You don’t actually talk to anyone else like we’re talking, right?
You no one else calls me their baby if thts wat ur wondering at least not to my knowledge lol im all urs
my husband That makes me very happy to hear:)
Yeah, it makes you very happy, too.
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hope you liked it!! xx
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quackisinnit · 3 years
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Karl, Wilbur, Quackity, and Sapnap with insecure plus-sized s/o
Hello! Can I request some Karl, Wilbur, Quackity and/or Sapnap x insecure plus-sized reader? (They/them), like just hcs if that works?
Notes: if you want more cubby/pus sized s/o content, check out @/cubbity !! they're a mcyt writer dedicated to writing chubby! reader fics. they also have an anime blog if i remember correctly:) also im kinda proud of this:D [divider: puppykei]
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Karl
oh ho ho
this man would HYPE you up if he ever got the chance
if you ever wore anything that you weren't so sure about/ kinda insecure about
he would shower you with compliments
"What do you mean? You look amazing!"
"I think this looks great Y/n!"
if anyone made fun of you cause of how you look
he would be like
"Thats not very nice >:( they look great, you just can't admit that"
he loves resting on your chest
not in a weird way obviously
just anytime you cuddle, he would always head for you chest
he just finds it comfy:D
if you have stretch marks
get ready to have them kissed
he just loves you so goddamn much
Wilbur
he wouldn't really care
he's just like
"Physical appearance does not matter to me"
so if you're ever insecure,
he's always there
"I think you look nice, don't let anyone tell you otherwise"
if someone is making fun of how you look
they have to get through wilbur first
which is gonna be hard
if you were in his stream
and someone in chat/donated that you were fat (in a derogatory way)
PROTECTIVE WILBUR MODE ON
he would just stare at it for a few seconds out of disbelief cause
'what??? my?? s/o?? is?? so?? attractive???'
but he'd act chill kinda about it
"please dont ever say that again, or else you'll get permantly banned."
if you ever cuddle, he just loves staring at you
you're just so attractive to him
its just too hard for him to not look at you
he likes to cup/hold your cheeks
its just so cute and chubby jshsjs
for stretch marks, he doesn't care
you can't control it and he still loves you
this man is in love<3
Quackity
this man is whipped for you
(is that the right word lol)
or entranced by you
he just loves every part of you
if you start saying things like
"i should lose some weight, i look ugly:("
he would reassure you that you're not ugly at all
"what?? you're perfect!"
like he'd always be there just to reassure you
like if your in a room and looking at yourself in a mirror
he'd just come out of nowhere to compliment you
someone is making fun of you on twitter?
he's there
he makes a serious tweet and everything
maybe even a video
"hey guys, don't make fun of my s/o. it isn't cool nor funny, you're just being an absolute dickhead."
and all the hate towards you would just
disappear
like it never existed
cause he's really intimidating when serious😭
when cuddling
he just loves your stomach and fingers
they're just so cute
he loves laying on your stomach and playing with your fingers
and if you have stretch marks, he loves tracing them
like he places his finger on them and treats them like a maze
(this is from a tiktok i saw a few months ago xjshsj)
Sapnap
he would be a mixture of everyone on this list KSBSJ
his compliments would be pretty creative
"they say disneyland is the happiest place on earth, well clearly they've never been with you"
or sumn like that KSHAJS
or sometimes just normal ones
"you look great:)"
you're getting made fun of?
they better get ready to square up
cause he's gonna fight 'em
"hey, don't say that shit."
"not cool dude😐"
he is a thigh man and you cannot tell me otherwise
he loves laying on them and grabbing them
in a none sexual way ofc
they're so pretty to him
like if he's laying on them
expect them to be kissed
also stretch marks?
loves them too!!
like wilbur, he says things like
"you cant control it. it's beautiful and never be ashamed of them"
like karl, he loves kissing them
he's just like "i can't stop looking at you, you're just to attractive"
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