Tumgir
#ive been Not doing these which is ok bc they take like 20 minutes but.
oceancracker · 2 years ago
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chapter 5: Cheapshots
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snabulous · 2 years ago
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y’all mind if i
*expresses a genuine emotion other than happiness around my dad and gets shouted down immediately*
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hangovercurse · a year ago
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Crash Into Me
You’d been MGK’s assistant for years, but you never thought you had a chance at anything more with him until one stoplight changes everything.
Request: “ok im so sorry if this is 2 specific but ive had this idea for ages abt pining!colson x an insecure/clueless!reader who has been his assistant forever. she gets into a car accident and calls him hours later to tell him that a temp will be taking her place for a few weeks (bc of injuries) and he's like ?? why?? she explains nonchalantly, then kells kinda freaks out and shows up at the hospital all worried”
Colson Baker X Reader
Warnings: Cursing, car accident (descriptive)
A/N: This was cute 😊
Word Count: 3185
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“Alright Kells, I’m out for the night. I’ll email those tracks to the board when I get home and I’ll let you know if I get any updates for tomorrow’s press.” You told the blond man who was sitting on the couch as you put your laptop into your bag. You tried not to yawn as you heaved it over your shoulder, “anything else?”
You glanced at the kitchen clock that read 2 am and let out a small sigh. You were used to late nights given your job as assistant to a rockstar, but most nights you were able to leave before 8 pm. Tonight you and Colson had gotten really invested in the tracks you were editing and lost track of time.
“Y/N,” he turned to look at you with puppy dog eyes. He wanted something that you really weren’t gonna want to give him. “Could you come over early tomorrow to help me pick out what to wear for the Vanity Fair interview?”
You chuckled, “you know they have their own wardrobe department?”
He sighed, “yeah but you know me so much better than all those stylists. I trust your opinion more.”
You rolled your eyes as he tilted his head, begging you. “Fine, but I’m buying us coffee with your credit card.”
He broke out into a smile, “thank you, love you!” He called as you walked towards his front door.
“Whatever, I’ll see you tomorrow.” You told him, taking your car keys into your hands, and stepping out into the LA night. There was a soft breeze that shook the trees slightly, making you smile. It felt nice outside for the first time in a while.
Because of this, you decided to drive home with your windows rolled down, letting the wind flow through your hair. The roads were pretty barren by LA standards, so traffic was pretty much non-existent. You were sitting at a red light, your fingers tapping against your steering wheel as one of Colson’s songs played through your speakers softly.
You reached to turn up the volume as the light turned green. You pressed the gas, your car moving forward into the intersection. Suddenly you heard a loud squeal of brakes, looking over to your passenger window to the sight of two headlights barreling towards you. You tried to speed up to get out of the way, but it was too late.
The truck rammed straight into the side of your small car, pushing your vehicle over into the car next to you. You put your left arm up to shield you from any flying debris, but it was futile. The infrastructure of your car fell apart at the force, the dashboard collapsing onto your right leg. Luckily, your left leg managed to avoid the destruction.
You could barely feel the force of the whiplash due to the pain in your abdomen at the deployment of the airbag. Glass from the car next to you fell into your car through your open window, cutting into your skin.
And then all of a sudden, everything stopped. The truck that had hit you had stopped moving, allowing you to fully assess the damage. Your car was totaled for sure, and your leg was definitely crushed. You cried out in pain, breathing heavy and trying to see straight. You could hear the sound of sirens in the distance, giving you some sense of relief.
When the paramedics got to the scene, you were the last passenger to be taken out of the crash due to your car being in the center. A firefighter had to break the glass of your windshield, which was already cracked, in order to pull you out. When you told him your leg was stuck under the dashboard, he sent a team of men to lift it from your foot and another to pull you out of the wreckage.
They were all amazed you were still conscious but got very worried when you told them you couldn’t feel the pain in your leg. You rode in an ambulance to the hospital, the EMTs helping pick the glass from your skin and assessing your injuries. You made jokes with them to calm yourself down, something that you did with Colson and Rook whenever they got into accidents while you were out with them.
You thought about giving them Colson’s name when they asked about your emergency contact but decided against it. You didn’t want to worry him until absolutely necessary. You figured you’d see what the doctor had to say and if you wouldn’t be able to come back to work, then you would tell him.
Unfortunately, that’s exactly what the doctor said. In fact, you wouldn’t be able to leave the hospital for at least a week due to your shattered leg, bruised abdomen, and concussion.
The leg would require at least 2 if not more surgeries to repair and you would be on close watch for development of a more serious brain injury. After that you most likely wouldn’t be able to be back on your feet for another 8 to 12 weeks, which was kind of a requirement for your job.
It was almost 5am, so you weren’t necessarily thinking straight when you called Colson from your cracked phone. He answered, his voice conveying how tired he was. “Y/N? Everything okay?”
“Hey Kells, I’m not gonna be able to come in early tomorrow, or at all. I’m gonna start looking for a temporary replacement tomorrow if I’m feeling up to it. Oh! And I couldn’t send those tracks to the board, sorry.” You told him, only half registering the words you were saying.
The confusion was evident in his voice, “what? Why do you need to find a replacement?”
You realized you had forgotten to tell him what happened. “Oh, yeah! It’s kind of funny.” You started, chuckling but then realizing that laughing made your stomach hurt even more. “And by funny, I mean not funny at all. I got into a car accident. Some dude ran into my car in an intersection and now I’m in the hospital.”  
“Which hospital?” Colson asked, suddenly much more awake.
“Hollywood Presbyterian.” You told him, “why?”
He sounded like he was rushing around, which he was. “I’m coming to see you.”
You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, “why? I’m fine, you don’t need to do that. You have a big interview tomorrow, you should sleep.”
Colson sighed, “fuck the interview, I’ll be there in a few.”
“Colson you don’t-“ You started, but he hung up before you could tell him not to come.
Why was he rushing to see you in the hospital? Sure, you were friends, but he had much more important things to worry about right now. And besides, you were more casual work friends. He wouldn’t even know you existed if you didn’t work for him. Sure, you had a huge crush on him, but he was your boss, you were just someone he asked to do things he didn’t want to do.
 20 minutes later Colson ran into the hospital room, stopping when he saw you in the bed. Your face was red from chemical burn and a few cuts of glass. Your right leg was propped up with basic bandaging around it. His heart broke at the thought of how much pain you had probably been in.
“How are you feeling?” He asked softly, moving to sit in the chair on your left side.
You shrugged, “I’ve been better.”
“Why didn’t you call me sooner?” He asked, eyes full of pity.
“I didn’t want to bother you unless it was serious. Figured I’d find out if I would have to miss work before telling you.” You said, squeezing your eyes shut as a headache washed over you.
Colson’s mouth gaped open, “you didn’t want to bother me? You got in a car crash and you weren’t gonna call me unless you would have to miss work?”
You shrugged again, “yeah. If my laptop wasn’t completely crushed in the accident I would’ve just found and sent a temp in tomorrow, but obviously that’s impossible.”
“Y/N you’re kidding me, right?” He asked, exasperated. You furrowed your eyebrows in response, causing a sigh to fall from his lips. “Y/N I don’t give a shit about a temp; I want to make sure you’re okay.”
“Oh, I’m fine. A little shaken and these headaches are killer, but they gave me a lot of pain medication so, I’m fine.” You smiled at him, your thoughts racing as you tried to figure out why he cared so much about how you were feeling.
He nodded, hand reaching out and landing on top of yours gently. “So, do they have to do surgery? What all did the doctors say?” He asked, worry in his eyes.
You nodded, “yeah, at least 2 surgeries. One around 11 am and then depending on how that one goes they’ll schedule the next. And they have to watch me to make sure my concussion doesn’t get worse.”
He pulled out his phone, typing away. “What are you doing?” You asked, suddenly feeling very tired.
“I just emailed the PR liaison for Vanity Fair and told them I wouldn’t be able to make it to the interview.” He responded.
“Why did you do that?” You asked through a yawn.
He looked at you like the answer was the most obvious thing in the world, “because I have to be with you right now.”
You were very confused as to why he thought he had to be here. “Colson, I’ll be fine. You should go to the interview. You don’t have to stay here.”
“I do have to be here. I want to be here.” He said, sternly.
“Why?” You asked, trying to keep your eyes open.
“Because I wanna make sure you’re okay.”
“I’ll just call you after the surgery, it’s no big deal.” You responded lazily.
He shook his head, “I want to stay here with you, Y/N. Okay? I care about you.”
You were too tired to process what he was saying at this point, so you just let out a hum. “I need to make sure you’re okay. I need to see you being okay. When you called me, I swear I was gonna have a heart attack if I didn’t see you.” He continued.
You were barely awake at this point, letting out a simple, “I’m okay” before slipping into unconsciousness.
 Suddenly you were back in your car, “Bloody Valentine” playing from your speakers. The sky was dark green, almost like a painting. In front of you, the red light turned green. Like clockwork, you pressed the gas, moving into the intersection. Suddenly, the lights disappeared, and you heard the familiar chilling sound of breaks squealing. You looked over and saw those headlights coming towards you, getting closer and closer, brighter, and brighter.
You screamed at the sight, the familiar paralyzing fear coursing through your body again. “Y/N!” Your name played through the radio. That’s not in the song, you thought. “Y/N!” Colson’s voice rang out again before the truck made contact with your car.
You woke up in a cold sweat to Colson standing over you, hands shaking your shoulders lightly. “Y/N.” He said, relieved when your eyes began to open.
Your entire body was shaking like a poodle and your arms subconsciously reached for Colson, hanging onto his shirt for dear life. “It was just a dream.” He whispered as your eyes darted around the room. “You’re okay.” He reassured you.
“I’m sorry.” You muttered, hands leaving the fabric and moving to cover up your face. “I’m sorry.”
Colson sat on the bed next to you, legs hanging off the side as he stroked your face gently. “It’s okay, baby.” He turned to the nurse who opened the door, a worried expression on her face. He shook his head at her, “sorry, she just had a nightmare. She’s okay.” The nurse nodded but stayed in the room anyways, checking your vitals.
“I’m sorry.” You mumbled again, the words seeming to be the only thing you could say.
Colson shook his head, “stop saying that, it’s okay.” You pouted at him, trying to scoot over so he would lay down next to you, but it was way too painful. “What are you doin?” He asked, a smile on his face.
You sighed, “wanted you to sit next to me but I can’t move because of this stupid leg.” You motioned to the leg in question.
Colson chuckled, “I can sit next to you in the chair.”
“That didn’t work last time.” You whined.
He looked at you with an expression that was both amused and confused. You were definitely still high on pain medication. “What didn’t work.”
“It didn’t stop the nightmare.” You frowned, hand reaching for his. He chuckled, standing up fully and looking at the nurse.
She flashed him an amused smile, “If you want, we can try to move her. I don’t know how much we can do without hurting her ribs, though.”
Colson nodded with a gracious smile, “hear that? We can’t move you because of your ribs.”
You glared at him, “I may be very high right now, but I’m not that high.” You said, making him giggle. “She said you could try.”
Colson let out an exasperated sigh, one arm going under your back and the other under your left leg. “Is this what it’s like taking care of me all the time?” He asked and you nodded your head firmly.
“Yep. Except I am much smaller than you, so you have less work to do with me.” You smiled as he lifted you off the bed, which quickly turned into a grimace. “Ow!” You yelped and Colson quickly set you down, slightly closer to the right side of the bed.
“Fuck, sorry princess. Are you okay?” He asked, voice soft.
You nodded, sucking in your bottom lip to block the whimpers of pain that threatened to escape your mouth. “You probably don’t remember, but one time you were so crossed that you called me to pick you up from a party. But you couldn’t make it out of the car, so I had to carry you into your house. And then you demanded to sleep in your own room, so you made me drag you up the stairs instead of passing out on the couch like normal.”
Colson let out a breathy chuckle, glad you weren’t hurt too much. He carefully sat onto the cot next to you, pulling up his right leg to sit on the bed. His arm wrapped around your shoulders and pulled you into him slightly. You shifted so that you were comfortable, left hand finding his own left hand and holding it. He brought his left leg up onto the bed so he was fully laying with you.
Your head rest on his chest, a soft smile on your face as his thumb rubbed circles on your hand. The nurse left, satisfied that you wouldn’t hurt yourself further. Colson pressed a small kiss to the top of your head, causing your eyebrows to furrow.
“What time is it?” You asked him, to which he responded by pulling out his phone and showing you the lock screen. 8:47am. You nodded, a frown on your face, “did you get any sleep?” You asked him softly.
“I’m fine, I was asleep for a few hours before you called me.”
You sighed, feeling guilty. “You should go home and get some sleep.”
You felt him shake his head from behind you, “I’m staying right here.”
Despite wanting to force him to go home, you couldn’t help the happiness you felt at his stubbornness to stay with you. “You know you don’t need to be here. I won’t be offended if you leave.”
He chuckled, “stop trying to get me to leave. I’m here. On my own accord, okay? I’m gonna take care of you.”
You paused, thinking about the word floating around your head. “Why?” you whispered.
Colson’s face scrunched in confusion, “what do you mean “why”? Because you’re my friend and I care about you.”
“I mean, yeah. But I’m not like a “drop everything” kind of friend, I’m just your assistant.” You muttered.
Colson made an “are-you-serious?” face and let out a snort. “Seriously? You are so much more than you give yourself credit for. You mean the world to me, of course I’d drop everything for you.”
You couldn’t think of a response, his words making your heart race. “oh.” Was the best you could come up with.
“Y/N, seriously, you think way too low of yourself. You’re amazing.” He said, nose burying into your hair.
You shrugged, “you only say that because I take care of you when you’re drunk and help you do all the things you don’t want to do.”
Colson’s expression softened, a frown forming on his face. “I’m saying that because I think the world of you. You’re the kindest, funniest, coolest person I know. I meant it, when you told me you were in the hospital, my heart almost stopped. I felt sick to my stomach just thinking about you being hurt.” He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “I wish you could see how much you mean to me.” He mumbled.
You were quiet for a little while, processing what he had said. “You’re only saying that because I’m in the hospital.” You muttered, a frown on your face. You were trying to keep your hopes low, knowing once you were out of here, he would regret saying any of this.
“Y/N, are you being serious right now? I’m saying this because I’ve been fucking in love with you for the past year and a half.” He said and you could feel your breath catch in your throat. “I can’t believe you don’t see it.”
You bit your lip, turning to look up to him. “I just- I didn’t want- you wouldn’t.” You stumbled over your words, taking a deep breath, and starting again. “I didn’t want to read too much into it or get my hopes up. I figured you’d never be into someone like me so I just told myself you were being nice. I thought you only treated me well because I worked for you.” You mumbled.
He frowned, holding you tighter to him, “I am so, so into you. You are the only woman in my life who has ever stuck by me through my worst shit. Like even when I was a total jackass you stayed with me. How could I not fall in love with you?”
You bit your lip, tears threatening to spill at his sweet sentiment. You’d never had anyone say something that kind about you. You’d always assumed people only kept you around because you did stuff for them, but here was the man you were in love with telling you that he cared about you for you.
“I love you too.” You whispered, leaning your head further into his chest.
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nikrangdan · a year ago
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photographer!ni-ki
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pairing: photographystudent!ni-ki x gender neutral reader
genre: fluff, comedy
description: every time you went to the park you noticed a mysterious boy who would take pictures of the scenery on his cute little camera. you liked to see what he’d take pictures of from afar but one day you noticed his camera pointing straight at.. you
for ni-ki’s bday!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOVE <33 sorry i posted a day late but i hope u all enjoy!
———
“y/n!”
you groan before getting out of your bed at 10am
it was a saturday why was your mom yelling at u ..
you walked into the kitchen all sluggishly and rubbed your eyes
“you need to start taking suki on walks to the park. you need the exercise too.” your mom doesn’t even spare u a glance before walking out the door to run some errands
right
u forgot u were taking care of ur cousins dog while he was out of town... her name was suki
shes a little shiba inu AND SHES THE CUTEST THING EVER!!!!
WELP
u dont even have a choice anymore
u got somewhat ready before heading out with suki in your arms
shes so soft and fluffy
though u dont like to admit it, u kinda agreed with ur mom about u needing to exercise and get out the house
you’ve been cooped up in your room for days with no social or nature interaction
so
the park was about a 10 minute drive from ur house
and it was actually a really pretty park...
there was a lake and really pretty flowers everywhere and alot of gazebos and benches
and a nice open field of greenery
it basically looked like a park out of a movie
so you weren’t suprised that there was a decent amount of people there
but not too much thankfully.. or else you would’ve driven to another park with less people
you got out the car with suki and put her on the leash
let the walking begin!!!!
it was a really nice day out... the sun was shining but it wasnt too hot or cold
you led her onto the sidewalk and she began sniffing at the grass around her
whenever a few people would pass they would coo at how adorable she was
it wasnt until 5 minutes later that ur eyes locked onto a figure infront of the lake
you were just walking with suki in silence.. admiring the scenery
until u caught sight of a boy
u could only see his back but u noticed the camera over his shoulder
he was standing in one of those photographer poses where like one leg is bent and kind of out while his back is hunched to get that perfect angle of a shot
he was infront of the sidewalk railings where the lake begins and he was taking photos of the scenery across from it
it was a beautiful sight honestly
there was another sidewalk but behind it was colorful trees and blossoming flowers and bushes
u understood why he’d take pictures of it
you didnt see his face but u kind of acknowledged the boy before walking past him with suki
basically thinking he was just another passerby that you noticed making a single appearance in your life and never expecting to see him again
OH BOY U WERE WRONG
the next time you see him is 3 days later at the same park
you were walking suki again but this time at 7pm after dinner
the sun was almost done setting so the sky was getting darker but there was still a hint of the orange circle peeking from below
this time you walked further down the sidewalk path towards the scattered gazebos
and you noticed the same boy again
this time he was sat in one of the gazebos with his tiny camera in his hands
his back was hunched over again and he was looking closely at the pictures he had taken
‘oh its him again’ u thought
and that was it
LOL
u just acknowledged him in ur head AGAIN before u thought nothing of it and continued ur walk with suki
so the NEXT time u saw him was another 2 days later at 7pm again
you wanted to take suki on a quick walk
but you got tired after like 10 minutes so you sat down on a blanket u brought
suki was just laying next to u while u were on ur phone
it wasnt fully dark out yet and there was still a few people in the park
the fairy lights that were placed around were lit up already
it was super pretty and the weather was nice
after staring at ur phone for a few mins u looked up just to look around
and u saw Him again
wow
why do u keep seeing him !?!?!
his back was faced towards u like always
and he was like 40 feet away from u so he looked so tiny
but u could tell it was him because of his blond hair and black coat he always wore
you kind of zoned out and unfortunately ur eyes were trained on his back without u even noticing
and he
turned
around
for the first time EVER!!!!
its like he sensed someone staring at him
but yes he turned around with his camera in his hand
the first thing u noticed was that he got a new camera
it was a larger black one
definitely more expensive
Awe good for him!!!!!
and then u glanced up to see his face
and u made EYE CONTACT
u looked away so fast
because
He was SO CUTE.............
u awkwardly started looking to your left and tried turning ur face away from him
‘oh look at those beautiful um... birds.. yeah’
hopefully he didnt notice
*nervously sweats*
u didnt dare look back in that direction so u spent the rest of your evening in the park on ur phone or playing with suki
eventually it reached 8pm so u packed up ur stuff and went home
U were still kind of thinking about that boy....
so u were like
i need to go back
and u did Lol
u went back the next day at 6pm this time with suki
it was lighter out and the sky was beautiful
perfect for a certain boy to be taking photos
*evil laugh*
u were walking for like 15 minutes and u didnt see him anywhere :((((
the one time u go there for HIM
u settled down under a tree
suki immediately went on the blanket when u sat down too
you played tug of war with her and fed her some treats while playing
playing with her for 10 minutes straight definitely tired u out so u laid down and just stared at the sky
it was a faded blue turning into orange and pink
U were kinda bored so u sat up and started petting suki
you would occasionally glance up at the strangers walking past u
and
let me tell u what Happened..
u looked up at another lady walking her dog and went like
‘aweee that dog is so cute’ in ur head
and u took ur eyes off the dog and glanced to ur right
idk bc u felt like it
AND GUESS WHAT U SEE???!??????
THE BOY
LIKE 20 FEET AWAY
STANDING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FIELD
AND HE HAD HIS CAMERA UP TO HIS FACE
and it WAS POINTED AT U ??!?!
as soon as u looked in his direction he jumped and put his hands down
he like
Blushed????? and awkwardly smiled u know rubbing the neck and all that
he was embarrassed
ur cheeks were turning so red
BUT HE WAS SO ADORABLE
was kind of weird.... stalkerish but um
he cleared that up BECAUSE
He started walking over to u
he was wearing black jeans that were ripped on the knees with black high top converse
and a gray sweater with a black coat over it
HE JUST LOOKED CUTE OK
ur were like OMg []£{€]%[#{%€]£{
n he just Plop
he stood right infront of u basically towering bc u were sitting under the tree
suki noticed the boy and tilted her head like hmmmm???
u had the SMALLEST smile on ur face bc u wanted to seem friendly but not TOO friendly
he had his camera strap over his arm while he held it and his other hand was rubbing the name of his neck
“uh... sorry about that.. i didn’t mean to seem weird or anything!” he waved his hands infront of him to deny it
u just sat there while he talked like ❤️_❤️
“im uh taking photos for my class and i thought u looked nice so i took some pictures.. im really sorry i should’ve asked first now i seem weird or something im really-,”
u cut him off so he didnt ramble any longer
“no its okay! i get it” you gave him a warm smile and pet suki while she drifted to your side and kept her eyes on him
u both just stared at eachother for a few seconds before you spoke
“um.. would you like to sit?” you scooted over and made room for him in the blanket
WOW U WERE FEELING BOLD TODAY...
“uh sure” he set his camera down and sat beside u
“this is suki.. shes my cousins dog” u said when she climbed into his lap and started sniffing him
he grinned and pet her before looking up at you
“im ni-ki by the way” his cheeks turned a bit pink which u thought was cute
“y/n” you smiled
“suki seems to like you” u laughed
“so how long have you been working on this project or whatever?”
“oh um i started last week... i just have to make a portfolio of photos i take and turn it in” he said while keeping his eyes trained on suki
u noticed he didnt make eye contact with u often but u knew it was probably because he was nervous because u do that too
“can i see the pictures...?” u hesitantly ask him
his eyes light up when u say that
“yeah!”
AWE HES SO EXCITED
he picks up his camera next to him and clicks a few buttons
“oh by the way... ive noticed u at the park before! you’re always with the camera” you laugh
“ah yeah, this park is where most of my project photos are taken.”
he leans over and shows you the pictures on the device
“woah” you let out a gasp
he showed u the picture he took of you first
How does a picture look better than real life...
you’ve never really been into photography but now that you’ve seen his work u might just have to start getting into it
“this isnt even done yet, i still have to edit it so it’ll look even more perfect” he shyly says
“this is amazing what the heck” your jaw is Dropped
“thanks”
“i need to see the final result” u said because it was such a nice picture
“um.. if you give me your number i can show you it” he sent you a cheeky grin
SMOOTH.....
he was so AGGGHGGHG ur kind of obsessed
you two exchange numbers and talk about random things for a whole hour until he says he has to go
“it was really nice meeting you.. i had fun” he tells you as he starts standing up
suki is sleeping so he tries not to wake her up
“i had fun too” you smile
“would you like me to walk you to your car?”
A GENTLEMAN !!?!?!?!
“oh yeah, thanks”
you two spend another 2 minutes together as you walk side by side with suki in your arms and he held your blanket and bag for you
you reached your car and thanked him
“ill see you soon, dont forget to text me! and good luck on the project, i know you’ll do great”
“thank you..”
ni-ki’s cheeks turn pink once more before he turns around and starts walking away with a smile on his face
he is just the cutest thing ever
you definitely need to see him again
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scarynpd · 3 months ago
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ok this is like 5 minutes before i check the meaning of the song, i just wanna document my interpretation of it before i actually find out what its meant to be. none of this post is gonna make sense
ive been listening to pretty much only glass animals for the past week, with the exception of maybe 20 minutes of other music before going right back to zaba and htbahb. anywya so i know htbahb has one song for each character on the album cover, and i havent read about any songs other than mamas gun, life itself, and a little bit of youth. so idk who the other characters relate to.
anyway. im just documenting that i am pretty certain in my brain that the narrative of the other side of paradise is about a man who kills the girlfriend of his ex boyfriend. which tbh is probably the most bare bones and basic thing i could pull from this song. but im doing an analysis anywayyy bc im bored and have been thinkinf about this for days ^_^
sooo im gonna give my analysis before i read about what the song actually means !
sooo obviously the singer had a boyfriend, he left to make it big, met a girl, talks about her to the singer, and the singer is bitter about her. that is like basically written out for us. now onto my personal interpretation of the song forwards!
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specifically the last two lines of this verse is like. the beginning of when the mc kills the girlfriend. i try to keep my cool but my life turns in slow motion aka i try to keep my cool but all im seeing is red and all im feeling is the agonizingly slow movements of my hand raising the gun level to the person in front of me.
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bye bye baby blue as in hes saying goodbye to the woman his ex loves. caught up in a rush its killing you as in she is literally dying she is being killed. shes screaming, shes about to go into the sun (dying dying yadda yadda going to the sky when she dies).
i settle for a ghost i never knew SOOO with the narrative that he kills her, this could be literal. he never knew her and now shes a ghost. BUT if its a completely different narrative, then i take this as his bf ghosting him and him feeling like he never knew his bf in the first place. just wanted to throw that one out there.
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that girl is gone bc you killed her, you silly fool! and he still tries for his ex's affection, though he knows he'll never get it back. they r over.
the bullet hit but maybe not OKAYYY sooo this could either mean he's killing himself orrr in a more metaphorical approach, he is reminiscing about when he killed the girl, and he's having doubts about "what if i didnt actually kill her, what if the bullet didnt hit her and shes not dead". and then that realization hits him, and he feels numb. he goes into a near craze, vision going blurry with what if's. he cant see in front of him, his body looks mangled in his twisted, darting vision. he feels sick.
repeat of the chorus. either this is the original more literal approach where he kills himself out of guilt, and this time the chorus is paralleling the girl being killed with himself being killed, or with the one where he realizes she may not be dead, he reminisces about her death, analyzing and hoping, praying desperately that shes dead and wont come back. he never finds out, and that's good enough for him. he settles for believing shes dead.
ok gonna go read an actual analysis on this song goodbye
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themauvesoul · 9 months ago
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Ok since ive been asked
@kat-stratfords-ponytail here is how to make my pizza bread. U will need:
5-6 cups of flour
1 packet of yeast
1 1/2 teaspoons of salt
2 cups of warm water
Some spices
Ur preferred pizza cheese
Ur favorite pizza toppings
An unspecified amount of corn meal
1 egg’s worth of egg whites
2 bowls
1 baking sheet
A rolling pin
DISCLAIMER: I just made this shit and I’m not making it again. so you don’t get pics. Sorry.
Anyways to start off put 2 cups of flour, the salt, the yeast, and your spices in a decent sized mixing bowl. What spices, u ask? Idk. Pick what seems like it’ll taste good. I grow a lot of herbs so I usually put fresh basil, parsley, and oregano. Maybe some garlic and onion powder. Perhaps some red pepper flakes. There are no quantities with the spices. U feel that shit in ur heart.
add the 2 cups of warm water. U gotta make sure that the water is warm bc that’s what activates the yeast. Too cold, and your bread will not raise. Too hot, and you will kill the yeast. So like. U know the perfect hot shower temp?? That’s roughly how hot ur water should be. Anyways add the water and then mix that shit until it isn’t clumpy. So like. Stir it aggressively for a minute or so.
Add the rest of the flour one cup at a time. Basically for this bit you’re just drying out the dough until it’s workable. So like. Once you’ve added enough flour it’ll be impossible to stir. At that point u gotta get in there with your hands and knead it until the dough sticks together enough that you can pick it up with relative ease. Once you’re at that point, lightly flour your counter and turn the dough out. Knead it until it’s nice and firm (8-10 minutes). Once you’ve gotten the dough to the point where it forms a nice little ball, grease a bowl and stick the dough in there. Put the ugly side down and then flip it over, so the whole dough ball is greased. Then cover it, and let it sit for an hour.
IF YOU DONT KNOW HOW TO GREASE A BOWL: pour some oil in a bowl and spread it around with ur fingers. What oil? Any oil. Olive oil. Vegetable oil. Whatever you’ve got lying around your kitchen. It doesn’t really matter the oil is just to make sure the bread doesn’t stick to the bowl.
IF YOU DONT KNOW HOW TO KNEAD BREAD: I’m not writing out all that. Go look up a YouTube tutorial please.
Ok so you’ve let your bread sit out for an hour and now it’s fucking MASSIVE. punch down that bitch! Put your fist in the middle and press until it deflates. Then u gotta turn ur dough back out onto the counter, which is presumably still messy from when u were kneading it. Let ur bread sit for another ten minutes.
While ur bread is resting, start preparing ur toppings. I typically use pepperoni, banana peppers, and mozzarella cheese. Theoretically you can use anything.
Ok so ur bread is done resting. What ur gonna wanna do is grab your rolling pin, lightly flour it, and roll ur dough out into a 9x15 rectangle. Ish. The dimensions do not have to be exact. Once ur done rolling out the dough, sprinkle your toppings on. Be sure to leave about 2 inches of space on the short ends and an inch of space on the long ends. When you’ve got all your toppings laid out how u want, roll that bad boy up!! Seal off the roll by pinching all along the seam, and then pinch the ends together. If you want the ends of your bread to look pretty, you can fold the very ends over and pinch that to make sure it stays.
Once ur bread roll is all pinched together, grab ur baking sheet and sprinkle some cornmeal where your bread is gonna go. Be generous. We ain’t greasing this shit, so if you don’t use enough your bread WILL stick. Once ur pan is all situated and properly sprinkled, grab ur bread roll and put it in the middle of the cornmeal, seam-side down. Let that bad boy rest for another half hour or so.
Preheat ur oven to 375 degrees. Idk what it is in Celsius because I’m American and too sexy for math. While ur oven is preheating, take a sharp knife and cut four slits in the top of the loaf. Then take ur egg whites, mix them with a tablespoon of water, and brush the top of the loaf with the mixture.
The oven has finally preheated! Pop that bad boy in the oven! After 20 minutes, take it out and brush it again with the egg white mixture. Bake for another fifteen minutes or until the outside is golden brown and it’s hard when you tap it. Remove from the oven and let cool for however long u have the patience.
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chestcavityheart · 10 months ago
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sherlock holmes reactions part six (aka me losing my mind over the final problem)
Hi, I am once again reminding you all that I've formed a parasocial relationship with the crackhead detective 👍 This made me overly emotional for the fact that he didnt even die
But like
hhhmmmmmmmm those were certainly an interesting 14 pages
Yeah, I already made a post about how the final problem relates to yuumori's final problem and how incredibly sexy it is but yes now I'd just like to relay to you how absolutely heart brocken i am over this lol I will eventually get to reading the post hiatus stories i just. I haven't emotionally recovered from this yet
Yelling below the cut somehow this reaction feels longer than the story itself. but it's about half cracking jokes and half sobbing so be prepared
I mean, starting off strong with "well yknow since i got married my and sherlock's Very Intimate Relations had to be modified and all but we hadnt seen each other in a while so it was kind of jarring to see him crawling in my second story bedroom window clutching Wounds and closing the shutters absolutely fucking wasted losing his mind over some dude named moriarty"
We've been over this but. Oh my god why are they gay
I just like????? Imagine how fucking bizzare that would be to just see your old homie crawl into your window bleeding on your floor and asking to exit the other way in case he's followed like "hey bro can we Talk i hope you're not busy" WHAT IS HE SUPPOSED TO DO, SAY HE IS? Imagine watson just like "no dude I'm fucking busy go get killed"
But legitimately. That's certainly something. And like, I see a lot of books starting like this lmao but. Holmes's stuff usually starts off kind of easily with watson going "yeah so lately ive been Experiencing Sherlock Holmes" and spend 20 minutes on exposition with them having a Conversation but no. mans just fucking escaped a hitman and went directly to his boyfriend's house having apparently Never Before In His Goddamn Life mentioned his actual nemesis to this guy. How the FUCK has watson never heard of him before.
And how sherlock starts talking about it isn't any less funny he's just like "UHHH SO THERE'S THIS GUY. THIS ABSOLUTE MAN. AND HES REALLY IMPRESSIVE I MEAN HES LIKE SUPER FUCKING SMART AND HES LIKE DOING CRIMES????? SO I LIKE. I NOTICED AS I DO BUT HE NOTICED THAT I NOTICED AND I MIGHT HAVE MADE A LITTLE FUCKY WUCKY DUDE CAN YOU HELP ME LIKE. FLEE THE COUNTRY" and watson's like my dear sherlock What The Fuck
Im also loving how he calls moriarty a "mathematical celebrity" awhi;grih;oaewhhta;ioh;iaewh;ii;oewh;eh;rg mans just. ok lol hes a Math Celebrity that had to quit his math teacher job because EVERYONE JUST KNEW HE WAS A CRIME LORD LIKE THEY TOOK ONE LOOK AT HIM AND WENT MANS DEFINITELY HAS BODIES IN HIS BASEMENT I DONT WANT HIM TEACHING HERE
But yeah, it was interesting to see what the big deal about og moriarty was... especially since the deal simply did not deliver. There was not really a big deal. It's like reading the first chapter of a book and immediately skipping to the climax. Everything is so hyped up and clearly having been building for years and you just get like NO CONTEXT. I swear Moriarty wasn't goddamn mentioned any time before this. He's just suddenly the big guy and watson has just never fucking heard shit about this guy.
What's so funny about this whole situation is that I just. Cannot objectively know anything about Moriarty at all because sherlock just... does not go into what this dude's alleged crimes even were, other than. The fact that he like. Does them. He's just really involved in crimes. How? Why? For how long? In what way? For what purpose? NO FUCKING CLUE HE JUST. HE JUST DOES. And there's nothing to really suggest that Moriarty was honestly a really evil guy. They're all like trust me he was just. he was just really bad but show absolutely No examples of being such. The most evil thing we saw Moriarty do personally was call sherlock stupid for letting him get into the apartment. And even then he immediately followed it up with complimenting him lol
yeah, my impression of Moriarty was like. I expected him to be worse, honestly. I expected him to be like a cartoon villain because he was kind of made out to be one and then he's just honestly a really polite and refined guy?? Mans strolls the fuck into 221B like hi shawty and it is Not like yuumori obviously man's holding a gun but like. What the fuck they are just. They have never met before but They Clearly Have and it's. its so weird
Like honestly I don't dislike og moriarty. He's really what william tried to be (and fucking failed, but beside the point) but like. Dude's so powerful and for what. He just walks into the apartment with No Pretense like why sherlock holmes is that a revolver or are you just happy to see me oh my goodness you are a dolt why would you hold the gun that way. disgusting. disgraceful. dreadful. Oh my god. I love him I'm sorry
abngnahhghifeah;iewh and Why does sherlock describe him like that hes like "MANS A REALLY REFINED LIZARD /pos" HIEHIFEHW:HGIHOEWFEEW FOR WHAT. FOR W H A T
baaaaaaaaghhhhhh but likeeeee they went STRAIGHT to "you know what I'm here for" "you know how I'm going to respond" "well then" "yeah" "mhm" "damn well it really do be like that sometimes" "ur really smart by the way" "im fucking aware let's kill each other as we both Thought in our Minds" "yes lets" AHDHDHDHDFS WTF THIS IS INSANE
But damn uh. mutual destruction my beloved this is very different from sherliam but im not. im not. opposed to it tucks hair behind ear
I just. Holy shit they really went "if you destroy me I will ensure that we both go down hand in unlovable hand" "I wouldn't mind that"
Annnnd I just noticed that the actual lines for this part kind of. that kind of happened in chapter 31 when sherlock was like i would Gladly die to take down the lord of crime and william was like. hahahah yeahNO NO NO NO
BUT SERIOUSLY THO IM LOSING MY MIND OVER HOW SHERLOCK SAYS THIS WHOLE THING TO WATSON AND HES LIKE DAMN SHAWTY HES LIKE THE REASON FOR HALF THE CRIME IN THIS CITY BUT HES SO NICE THO??? LIKE I EXPECTED HIM TO BE TOUGH AND EVERTHING NO HES JUST SOME POLITE PROPER UNDERSTANDABLE MAN WHO JUST HAPPENS TO BE VERY DIABOLICAL shawty is having a Crisis
And then watson is like wowww that was cool you wanna spend the night and sherlock is like "UNFORTUNATELY BESTIE I AM BEING FUCKING TRACKED DOWN ID LIKE YOU TO NOT DIE WITH ME"
This bit gave me a Moment Moment because oh my god. Then watson is like "no shut up i'm coming with you i don't care" and i just had to Take A Minute because THEY SWITCHED PLACES AAH SHERLOCK IS TRYING TO KEEP WATSON SAFE NOW AND WATSON IS NOW MORE RECKLESS BC OF HIM AND. AHHHH
Completely random but. How sherlock still refers to 221B as "our rooms" to watson even though watson hasn't lived their in years........ shawty i am emotional.........
SO THEY GODDAMN FLEE THE COUNTRY TOGETHER BC WATSON SAYS THEY HAVE TO STICK TOGETHER AND SHERLOCK HAS A MOMENT WHERE HE'S LIKE YEAH NEVERMIND PLEASE GO HOME WATSON AND WATSON IS JUST LIKE. NO. AND HSERLOCK IS LIKE. DAMN OK I HAVE NEVER HEARD YOU SAY THAT BEFORE
But. Ok as funny as this is. They have this fucking Conversation on the train to switzerland where sherlock is like "I have not lived in vain" and watson is like "YOURE NOT DYING" and hes like "i have not lived in vain. like i said. this will not be a bad way to die" UHHHHHH DAMN SHAWTY
hhhhhh and it just Gets. it. it. it Gets. These fuckers get to switzerland and they stay in a hotel and then leave for reichenbach but watson gets this goddamn letter telling him that hes needed at the hotel to basically save this lady's life. And he doesn't. Like. he doesn't even want to go he's like FUCK IT SHE CAN DIE IM NOT LEAVING YOU but sherlock convinces him to go fULLY KNOWING THE LETTER WAS FUCKING FAKED BY MORIARTY JUST AS A PLOY TO GET HIM ALONE
AND THEN HE JUST. WENT ANYWAY AND WATSON HAD TO WATCH HIM JUST LIKE GODDAMN WALK OFF INTO THE SUNSET LIKE "LITTLE DID I KNOW THIS WOULD BE THE LAST TIME I WOULD SEE HIM BUT IT JUST. IT HAD THAT VIBE YKNOW"
God I just. Wow sherlock really did that huh. He really went and did that. And I went over it in the post about this compared to yuumori but it just RUINED me how watson just. Never saw what happened and there's just so little information about it that all they have is these assumptions and pieces that just suggest that these guys met up, walked up to the goddamn waterfall having a nice civil conversation about how talented and smart they both were at this and how they revealed their methods to each other and complimented them because of course they did
And they just sat up there talking to each other so long and Moriarty legit waited politely or even possibly was the one that suggested he write a letter to watson in which sherlock just went "damn lol moriarty's pretty nice actually anyway uhhhh sorry watson ily ✌" and just like. left it up there in his damn cigarette box
But just like. damn the insinuation that moriarty just sat there and watched while he wrote that entire goddamn letter, sealed it up, and then got up and went alright buddy let's go but it makes no goddamn sense if they wanted to actually kill each other and assure they themselves would survive I could name like 23 different ways they could have managed it so easily and they Didn't. they were really set on mutual destruction huh. There's no way they were even trying to do anything but Die Together at that point and that's Something huh
It absolutely baffles me how they could say that these guys had plummetted like, holding each other tho. Like. ok lol but How Do You Even Know
It was certainly a ride. But the fact that Watson had to actively try to think like Sherlock to figure out what happened in the scene was just. The cherry on top. Especially after they'd consciously started to switch roles in this i just. Damn.
In conclusion uhhhhhhhh gay people real I suppose
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does-not-suffice · a year ago
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Fans telling their stories of what it was like to meet Joanna Newsom in person.
Before being a fan of joanna newsom i'm a journalist and created a project about fans who met joanna, in order to humanize her, show how she is real like all of us and not the figure of an untouchable god that we created  in many moments about her, in order to bring her closer to the fans, and the fans to get closer to her, and especially to be a good content for the fans who have never met her, and fans like me who are unlikely to get  to know her.  I got in touch with some fans and they tell me their stories, if you have a story also send me a DM ... 
- Holly (hollmaid on IG)
“The show was amazing bc it was the second philly night and she played only skin, where she hadn’t the night before. I waited outside the venue at the stage door afterwards for about 45 minutes with a small group, when another fan came around from the front door and told us she’d popped out to say she’d be out that way soon to meet everyone. It was really nice of that guy to do so because when our group followed him back we were walking up as she came right out. She is impossibly tiny and impossibly sweet. She seemed genuinely happy to talk and take photos. I had to ask a stranger to take my photo for me and she was also stellar because she took like 20 so I had options haha. I feel a bit sad that I didn’t ask her to sign my ticket or anything but it was al over so quick and I was overwhelmed! I told her it was amazing she played only skin and then we hugged. I lurked for a bit after just to stare because ya know.”
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- Heather Elizabeth Noonan (dr_doge on IG)
“Ive been lucky enough to meet her 5 times! She was so beautiful and humble each time, 4 were after a concert and the 5th I ran into her in an antique shop while in texas to see her play, I just felt so incredibly blessed.  I had the chance to tell her everything ive ever wanted to tell her in the world,  how much her music means to me, how I started playing harp because of her, and a bunch of other things. She was so kind and down to earth!”
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- Malcolm (awfulatoll on IG)
“My story is actually very cute during the show i yelled out “play flying a kite!” during the q&a portion and she was just like “i- uh- wh- ohhhhh... i don’t think i remember how to play that”. so then after the show a bunch of us waited to see her and she came out and me and my friend nate (who i had followed on twitter for 3 years at that point but only met face to face for the first time that night - i’m canadian and he’s from new york, where we saw her) got a pic with her! other people got pics with her but i realized that i forgot to give her the gift i brought for her so i hung around a bit longer... everyone got their pic n then i ran back up (much to the annoyance of her security) and was like “hiii i just wanted to give u these” i gave her a bracelet and a cassette tape and a flash drive w a cover of sawdust and diamonds my friend made that i said i’d give to her. i also got her to sign the setlist for the show that one of the sound guys gave me. then (these seems like SOOO much but i was going quick bc i knew her team was tryna get her out) i asked if she would take a vid saying hi to a gc i’m in with a bunch of fans of hers. she did and it’s very cute! so she did that n then i was like OH BY THE WAY THAT WAS ME WHO ASKED FOR FLYING A KITE!! and she was like ohhhh yeah see i just don’t really connect with that song as much anymore! and i said well that’s understandable, it’s pretty old... but a lot of us still love it! and erin, and yarn and glue... think about it! and she just kinda laughed and i was like ok byeee love u thank u and she got in her car, andy walked by and i said hi to him too. I saw her again the next night! after the show nate and i waited again but this time there were SO many people waiting. i realized that i forgot to get my hoom cd signed so i really wanted to see her again, so anyways there were so many people. and i was scared her security was gonna try to get her to leave through the side door bc of that. so i told nate i was gonna go wait over there, so i waited over there and eventually this giant car pulled up and i heard joannas voice coming from the speakers. not her music but her on a phone call! she said she was gonna come out the side,i texted nate, and he told everyone and immediately a swarm of people come stampeding around the corner. joanna and her team walk out. team looks pissed but jo looks so happy. i get a pic and i thank her again and then walk away. THEN I REALIZE I FORGOT ABOUT THE CD. i hear someone in line say “who has a sharpie?” which I DO. so i offer my sharpie in exchange for getting my cd signed. they agree <3 we have a nice chat about judy collins. i hang around and make friends w more people in line, i gave my sharpie comes back and gives me my cd, now with the words “for malcolm, joanna newsom” on them. joanna says bye and i say “byeee see u again next tour!!!” and she laughs at that. the end!”
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- Shannon (diapermoneyy on twitter)
“I went to her show on september 12, 2019 in nyc. it was amazing and i pretty much cried the entire time. when it was over, i waited out front with a bunch of other fans, hoping to meet joanna. we waited for like 45 mins i think? then a couple people started walking around the side of the building and everyone followed like a herd lol. i found out later that someone decided to wait by the side entrance just in case and they texted their friend that a car pulled up. so if that person wasn't there i prob wouldn't have met joanna. only maybe 20 of us waiting and a guy came out and there were told us to have our cameras and everything ready and i went into panic mode bc OMG AM I GONNA ACTUALLY MEET JOANNA ?? !!?!? when she walked out i was in disbelief and couldn't believe any of it was real. i had my friend record my whole interaction bc i knew i wouldn't remember anything. when it was my turn to meet her i was so giddy and she opened her arms to hug me and i was like OMG THIS IS HAPPENING! when i went to take the selfie i accidentally hit the video button and started panicking trying to get it back to photo mode and joanna was so cute while i freaked out fjdnd she was so sweet to everyone even tho she had to be exhausted. i pretty much blacked out the entire time and i'm so mad i didn't tell her how much i loved the show and i really regret not thanking her bc her music helped me get through so much last year!”
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- Craig Soreth (on facebook)
“Here’s a picture of my wife and I meeting Joanna. This was in September of last year after her performance at the Kimmel Center in Philadelphia. It was supposed to be the first show of the tour but another date was added the day before because of the demand and how fast this one sold out. She was incredibly sweet, taking the time to talk and take pictures with everyone who waited. She even went out to the front of the venue once security said we had to exit and did not leave until we all had a chance to take a phot or spend a few minutes with her. An unbelievable experience that I’ll never forget.”
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- Andrea Lambe (insomniandra on IG)
I met her in March 2016, Well i was in class one night and ny good friend Sile (the person in the photo) called me and said she has been asked to tune Joanna's harp for her gig in Dublin And would I like to go to a free gig! We are both huge fans so of course I did go. We met her backstage, she was very nice and down to earth! We were over the moon as we were both such big fans.
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razorfangz · a year ago
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okay answers to this post bc i feel like it
have you played all of the games?
yes! aside from the wiiware games but tbh i dont count those rn
favorite one of the game youve played?
explorers of sky bc im a normie but also its my first pokemon game and it makes me feel things
fav partner character?
explorers of sky partner my little meow meow...
what did you name your hero and partner characters? and why?
really a lot of them vary in terms of the “why” but ive got azalea (cubone) and leopold (skitty) in rescue team dx, orchid (eevee) and daisy (pikachu) in base rescue team, astrid (??? cant decided between treecko and bulbasaur rn tbh) and haven (vulpix) from explorers of sky, peach (pikachu) in gates to infinity, and jay (froakie) and mimi (chimchar) in super. 
azalea and leopold are pretty basic, in hindsight i attempted to sort azalea’s character to her name after the fact? azaleas represent love and beauty, but also self sufficiency and the flowers themselves are toxic, and azalea is, well, self sufficient to the point she believes she doesnt need leopold at first, and the toxic bit puts her at a parallel with gengar. but really, it just sounded pretty and i liked it. leopold is to the point, it means bold and leo sounds like lion which is a cat and leo is a cat that is bold. also semi named after my cousin’s cat named leo. orchid and daisy are simple, i wanted a flower theme with that team. which i think is why i named azalea that anyways.
i’ll be honest, astrid is named that bc i was thinking of how to train your dragon at the time and it stuck. the meaning of the name doesn’t really correlate to their character. but i love it and tbh i don’t see myself changing it. haven, on the other hand, did have more thought put into it. she wants to be for other pokemon what the beach is for her- a safe haven. and in a storytelling sense, she is that for astrid! because they woke up confused and lost in a completely foreign world to them, and haven served as their safe place and guide in that world they could always depend on.
i... haven’t named my new gti partner yet. she’s an oshawott and her name WAS misty but well i got back into the anime and. yeah. i’ve also used the name cosmo but that’s the name of my poipole oc and i don’t like reusing names that aren’t being used currently. so she’s nameless. peach on the other hand spawned from the gti narrative that plays in my head. peach... didn’t really have a name he’d picked out when he was summoned. nothing really felt right at the time, and he didn’t feel motivated enough to actively look, so he was nameless. but oshawott kept pestering him and pestering him on how he felt after he fell, and frustratedly he snapped “well i’m doing just fucking peachy”. so oshawott started calling him peachy. and it stuck. out of universe it really did spawn from that interaction in my head and i went “why not its cute”.
jay is jay because well... jay is blue. that’s it. mimi has a bit more thought in that her full name is miriam, but also “mimi” sounds somewhat like a corruption of “mew”. this partner is also trans and figured at a young age so i think she also just thought it sounded cute subconsciously.
whats a pokemon you would like to be able to play as or with?
spikechunsoft you WILL make a new pmd so that i may play as a popplio with a scorbunny partner you WILL
how do you interpret gengar and gardevoir’s relationship post game?
they are not ex lovers y'all stop being weird he was her TRAINER-
anyways I've rambled about it before, and tbh i need to replay through the scene itself soon bc its been a minute, but i think the whole point of the postgame storyarc is that gengar doesn't deserve gardevoir back, at the very least he doesn't yet. after all, isn't that the point of him failing the test? he doesn’t TRULY regret the actual act of ditching gardevoir, because it saved his hide. the consequences just make him uncomfortable when thrown in his face. he feels remorse for what happened, but he wouldnt do things differently. as much as he wants to believe or say that he would. 
but he’s mature enough to admit that gardevoir didn’t deserve it. so that’s why she’s allowed another chance, and so her memories are erased and she starts anew, away from gengar, and he has to watch her thrive without her. it’s a good ending, but it’s yet another consequence for him, and a motivation for him to BECOME better, so he can be the friend gardevoir deserves. even better if you consider rescue team gardevoir and team charm gardevoir to be the same person. then you can make a narrative that medicham cucked gengar. and it’s awesome.
how do you interpret the future trios relationships to each other?
taking this as post special episode 5
as a whole: a new trio bound together vowing to make the world better. close knit, there’s some awkwardness here and there, but they’re all open with one another and getting better together. celebi and grovyle are the ones doing the initiating when it comes to changes in the future, while dusknoir hangs back a bit and thinks about it more, so he’s kind of a rock for the other two! not a polyam couple like a lot of ppl hc though, mostly because i headcanon grovyle and celebi to be like new adults at 18-20 ish in terms of human years while dusknoir is like 50. so yeah polyam is a no no here. that being said they aren’t PERFECT. not yet anyways. there’s still a bit of resentment from grovyle and celebi’s end, particularly over the hero, since if he hadn’t intercepted them at the old ruins... but there isn’t much they can do to change that, and things worked out anyways, so they’re working through it, and dusknoir’s getting over his guilt over not just that but all of his actions. it’s really just leftover grief from the hero not being around more than anything. other than that they are getting better!
grovyle and celebi: THAT couple. idk if i can quite call them childhood friends to lovers but they’re sorta that. trans bicons. grovyle isn’t really sappy in front of others (or dusknoir bc theyre also with him too and hes chill, a little “damn kids” but chill) but they’re very corny with each other. they’re closer with each other than with dusknoir as a trio. but that’s also because... well. you know. both are the ones initiating the changes around the world, they’re a power couple.
grovyle and dusknoir:  they’re close! they’re at a point where they’re confident in each other and have no real reason to doubt (going back on your own plan to save your enemy multiple times AND defying and incurring the wrath of your boss makes it obvious) dusknoir CAN be a tad jabbing towards grovyle though, like if grovyle gets into a fight that could’ve been avoided, dusknoir will make a dry comment here and there, and grovyle will do the same. still in that gray area where it’s both sorta jostling while dusknoir is trying to settle things, but also it’s somewhat serious if that makes sense.
celebi and dusknoir: definitely the ones that are the least close, celebi wasn’t exactly all warm to dusknoir at first. put up your dukes, dusknoir, gotta get ya back! but right now their relationship is somewhat cordial. she’s willing to listen to dusknoir’s input, not without a tease here and there though. but that’s to be expected with celebi. they both come around to each other and dusknoir respects celebi as a mythical pokemon, and they’re the ones who, besides dialga, are the most aware of the state of time (and y’know they’re probably the ones who arrange to meet the hero again...)
if youre an artist, how do you draw grovyle? same for dusknoir too. and why?
I was gonna sketch formally but im lazy. ideally i’d like to draw grovyle all sharp, considering he is supposed to be “scary” to treasure town. and give him some nicks in his leaves, i know lots of people do that but it adds to the look and damn it just looks good and it’s appropriate. i also give him a scarf in my design, but idk if he’s really a scarf kind of guy right now, miiight change that. 
and i wanna figure out how to draw dusknoir in general before i figure out how i wanna draw this dusknoir. maybe make him look more “ghostly”? with little bits of shadow seeping off of him? just to make him look a bit more “ragged” and sorta older like i imagine him to be. in the times i’ve tried getting him down i’ve tried to make his stomach pattern more “expressive” too, like when he’s happy his stomach grins, when he’s disgusted it scrunches up, etc. but he’s not really an open book, soooo maybe i’ll scrap this design quirk and give it to a different dusknoir oc for funsies.
what do you ship in the games? just like. in general.
well i already said grovyle x celebi, but i am also a hero x partner connoisseur if you will... mostly just the explorers of sky ones though. i can’t imagine my other teams as lovers honestly, besides mayyybe gates but peach is sorta grossed out by the idea of dating a pokemon, even though he is one now, and i don’t plan on changing that aspect of him. psmd!partner x espurr is an obscure one i like moderately though, as a kid crush thing. wigglytuff and chatot are THE Middle Aged Citizens ok they are in love and the guild is their excuse to raise a family. chatot is the strict parent. team charm is one big polyam couple no debate. the drunk heracross from spindas cafe and scizor the frozen explorer because of the inherent glory of heracross x scizor and i think scizor the explorer should find love. nuzleaf and carracosta too i think but i also think they’re exes at the same time so i dont know if that counts as shipping more than “they were an Item but Not Anymore”. umbreon x espeon is also cute...
opinion on nuzleafs character? also were you surprised by that twist?
well i was surprised by the twist because i was 14. buuut i don’t really care for it or nuzleaf. i think of all the “penultimate” (for lack of better term) pmd villains like munna and dusknoir, he’s definitely the weakest. he’s honestly only above darkrai to me. i think you know how i feel about pmd darkrai. im sorry i know hes country dad and the fandom loves him but i just Do Not Like Him. whereas yeah, you CAN say that munna was a rehash of dusknoir, you can still say she’s her own character, and it’s less that she’s a trusted figure betraying you, but more of a opossum playing dead while her friends are waiting to lure you out and jump you. nuzleaf... does feel more like a whole “hey our last two games had a betrayal scene so we gotta make sure this one does too!” kind of deal.
also this ties into my issue with psmd’s overall plot but i don’t really feel much sympathy for him because i have no idea how dark matter’s possession really works. is it more of an influence upon his actions? does he have any real agency? but the ending implies he was being controlled? is he a stranger to the hero? the game acts like he isn’t. what’s he like when he isn’t involved with dark matter? all we know is his influence with dark matter. all moments with him were fake, or he was out of town stoning pokemon. well, we know that he’s sorry, i guess, which is sad. but also i really kinda care more about partner, so i’m just kinda like “whatever” at those scenes. but also, dark matter apparently can possess any pokemon with negative emotions... so uh. Any Pokemon. dark matter kinda harps that it’s born out of all the negativity and evil in the world, which is why nuzleaf and the beheeyem fell to it, similar to the bittercold, but psmd doesn’t really back that up with its world? in gates, all the pokemon were depressed, angry, lashing out. the first mission is literally about a man who’s lost all semblance of care and hope because of the severe ableism he’s faced. 
so when munna says she’s doing what she’s doing because she’s lost faith in the world, we as the audience have no issue believing she’s been through shit. we know it had to be severe if the game never mentioned it. not to mention she’s not being possessed, she’s doing everything of her free will, and that makes her despair and cruelty all the more tense. nuzleaf is implied to have LESS agency, giving his actions less weight in the big picture. and when i’m told “he was possessed because he was frustrated with the world”... well my frame of reference is the partner having an RSD episode that one time and the adults all kinda chastising the partner. maybe some shenanigans with the litwick. krookodile mugging people i guess? the legendary dogs were all assholes? the world of psmd isnt really a shithole like gate’s world was, so the scale of what nuzleaf had to face is honestly kinda small considering even the smallest negative emotion gets to dark matter, unlike with munna. for all we know he stubbed his toe and dark matter yoinked him. (im aware the fanon likes to go deeper and i love it when it does but thats fanon, im looking at the canon)
idk. ive already written half an essay so ill stop now but yeah tldr i do not care for him and i think he couldve been done wayyyy better. maybe make it more like dark matter manipulated him than possessed him? so tricking him that he’ll only be loved if he’s on dark matter’s side or something? hmmmm... i dunno
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despacitosanders · 2 years ago
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janus' playlist not-really-analysis just me screaming
so first of all this whole playlist absolutely SLAPS, its the first side playlist that's just my taste and it doesnt surprise me that it's janus' bc of course it is i am absolutely 100% more attracted to him now somehow,
im absolutely not okay and this isn't gonna be articulate in any way but i. have to.
1. black hole sun
???hes sad?? apparently its about depression with some sexy snake metaphors....maybe hes just sad in general or he misses virgil. also postmodern jukebox hell yeah
2. it seemed the better way
this feels like it could be about patton or like thinking one thing and then realizing its not true ig could be that w society in general or people...him developing his trust issues possibly "i better hold my tongue, i better take my place" or like oh the other sides hate me ig ill be a villain then...
3. anywhere
janus sanders says fuck capitalism!
4. talking at the same time
eat the rich,,,virgil left me:(
5. all the good girls go to hell
he's needed and the others are starting to realize it. hes quite smug abt it "my turn to ignore ya, don't say i didn't warn ya" damn right boy
6. denial
he blasted this song after svs while crying "please don't turn the light out, i don't think the conversation's over" he had to wait almost a year but he finally got to continue that conversation,, "i know where you'd wanna go, oh i do, but do you?"
7. trust in me
i mean yeah sexxy snake moment right here
8. razzle dazzle
so obviously its just his aesthetic tm but the lyrics...are the jabs at roman or himself, perhaps both? i never took him to be very insecure but that's a possibility
9. when the chips are down
basically his speech about society in svs and how he doesn't want thomas to be disadvantaged in it
10. mandy goes to med school
uhhh yeah who knows there's a bit of a i know what im doing jk vibe going on and Doing Harm but the thing itself is necessary to Have yknow right to abortions its just theyre not legal so hes doing them illegally and apparently two ppl died from them so not great,,"my partner brian" at the end made me think of remus tbh "hes a nice man, thoroughly reliable, he's in a rock band" kinda gives off the vibe of eh yeah hes totally reliable lmao dw tho, so basically what im taking from this is dukeceit is canon thanks for coming to my ted talk
11. i put a spell on you
i mean its definetely his Vibes but idk if its @ anyone specifically...could be virgil, could be roman, maybe thomas himself...its a vengeful kinda song, hes like fuck you you're listening to me now im done you treating me like shit
12. evil night together
so aside from this being an extremely hot song its def dukeceit vibes as in they'd both like it but the hero part as others have pointed out is giving out major roceit vibes and thomas and co know this those bastards
13. cabaret: don't tell mama
im assuming this is more of a..this is what he likes to listen to plus its about secrecy which is his thing but i guess "mama" could be someone in particular as well, and/or he could be singing it to someone in particular...
14. you're a cad
bruh. first of i loved this song already secondly iM SORRY THOMAS WHAT ARE YOY IMPLYING HERE like first i was like this isn't abt Him right that wouldn't make sense so is it about...virgil...well ofc it is bruh what the fuck bro....im loving this bc its casting virgil in an unsympathetic light and i love that shit but also its revealing janus still Feels quite a lot for him and idk how to feel abt this i. the part of me that still loves anxceit is screaming and the part of me that hates virgil is also screaming they haven't stopped for a minute-
15. as far as i can see
so dukeceit vibes possibly virgil reference since he "went down the staircase" to his spot,,so basically he and remus maybe virgil and orange too like pushing ppl down the stairs bc they feel unheard
16. criminal
this is where the angst train rly starts choo choo....so. who is he singing about here. my god i want it to be roman so bad but it Could be virgil...which would imply he thinks he's wronged him somehow which would mean virgil has a more valid reason to dislike him and I Don't Like That. but whoever hes singing about is clearly important to him... "he's all i knew of love" bro....that's just screaming virgil right i dont like it op...basically he feels guilty for smth and to be "redeemed". he clearly doesn't need redemption from his canon actions so far, and he hasn't acted like he regrets any of them, which is making me think its abt smth in his past buut maybe he does feel bad for manipulating roman now bc he realized how hurt roman was and thats what i wanna believe it's about ok roceit rights except roman youre a bitch apologise
17. change
this made me fucking lose it bro im still losing it ive lost it. he's not okay and neither am i....bro i didnt think he'd be so....insecure but....i mean all of them seem to be so...but yeah this song is very,,,i have trust issues and im learning to love again vibes and i am crying while my wig is being ripped cruelly from my head....i choose to interpret this as less like ive been bad uwu i can change and be good now and more as ive been too afraid to care bc im so aware of the harm it can do to me but i realized its worth it so im trying now....and i think that's beautiful
18. devil in the details
hes telling thomas to Just Do It. he "made amends in the general sense" but "the devil's in the details" and he "knows the cause" and "wants to stop" but he "just can't do it". this seems kinda like more virgil angsty times for me or maybe the cause is just him being...him and just being well i cant stop being my function so...but he sees it as The Reason theres still animosity even if hes "made amends".
19. come little children
first i was like bruh its a bop but y is it here. but the lyrics are basically repeating how horrible the world is, "murdering beauty and passion", and the singer doesnt have to be killing or kidnapping the kids maybe its just a friendly fae helping some abused kids yknow you never know...basically fae!janus confirmed i know you have connections with them thomas i know you do
20. into the unknown
i like that this is short it kinda feels like hes coming to say okay im done bye after this whole musical that is his playlist. i am ashamed to say im not familiar w the plot of over the garden wall but someone said smth abt killing kids. well yknow how it is sometimes...but yeah very sexy, very fae, i will stan forever etc.
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dreamsafterhours · a year ago
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college boyfriend!markhyuk au series: III (mark’s pathway)
a universe in which roommates!markhyuk meet each other's s/o in class
markhyuk are roommates, my/n and dy/n are roommates, mark and dy/n take classes together and so do donghyuk and my/n — how will their fates intertwine?
genre: fluff pairings: mark+my/n (fem), donghyuk+dy/n (fem), platonic!mark+dy/n, platonic!donghyuk+my/n format: dotpoint AU universe: non idol, college bf warning: some swearing
masterlist
or click here to meet your soulmate, paediatrics!donghyuk!
II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV
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III: 별빛이 내린다 샤라랄라랄라라 (2+2=4)
the meeting of two souls: mark & my/n
hi hello good day how are you? i hope you're well today/tonight this is like 3 weeks late isn't it :D pls don't come after me i lost some motivation to write for a while but here i am now so let's get to it!!
aight so you met donghyuk's roommate for the first time yesterday and,,
you honestly had NO IDEA someone could be that cute
highkey regretting not asking for his name but you were so caught up in lingering on the fact that he implied you were pretty , like wHO DOES THAT ASDFKJL
you highkey shouted the verbal equivalent of a keyboard smash with ur roommate and she was all !! oh so this guy cute cute
you were contemplating whether or not to sneakily ask donghyuk for his name but you were worried bc hyuk has,, crazy sense when it comes to reading people and seeing through their words
and honestly you didn’t want to have to deal with hyuk potentially teasing the shit out of u for having a maybe crush on his roommate whom u’d just met
so you just beat your pillow sleep on it after your roommate reminds you it’s getting late and no life decisions should be made after 12am!! live by it
you wake up craving jjajangmyeon but alas if you were to get any satisfaction of that kind of hunger, it was going to have to wait because
~~ we love ~~ packed schedules ~~ in this house ~~
i hopes the sarcasm was noted in that previous sentence bc now u wish for life to cease
4 weeks into the semester and you were drowning in the midst of reports and lab pracs and content and revision
you were ready to ascend to the next life with only regret and an ability to vaguely explain the properties of a prokaryotic cell and endosymbiosis
but honestly donghyuk’s been a big help throughout the past month
your only friend in classes
official study buddy
2am revision session consultant
personal older brother bc he claimed you as his adoptive sister
another reason your roommate told you to go to bed was bc you literally have
a tutorial class + 2 consecutive 1.5 hour lectures + a 3 hour lab class to finish your day off
with no break for lunch in between :’((
looks like you’ll be starving through your library study session with dy/n
but oop
you find that dy/n had stayed up long after you’d fallen asleep writing her essay 
leaving your dorm feeling a twinge of guilt that u might have distracted her from focusing on her work to listen to your rambles and kept her up later than she should have been
but a text from her in the afternoon reassures u that honestly she wasn’t even planning to write that essay and The Feels™ had just hit her last night and that she made it to class
you: oh PHEW that’s good
you: sorry i didn’t wake you up on my way out, u looked so peaceful i couldn’t bear to disturb
dy/n 🦁: dw dw it’s all g i made it n e way
dy/n 🦁: also is it cool if my friend and his friend comes to the study sesh as well we have to go through some lecture content
you: ah yes don’t see why not :)) i’ll probs have my earphones in the entire time anyways lmao won’t affect me
but will it
“who u texting in the middle of diffusion” cue hyuk peering over at the phone you’re hiding in your lap
you click your tongue at him and lock your phone, “someone twice the man you’ll ever be”
he gasps in mock horror like he’d just witnessed a murder as quietly as he can ,,
“you’re texting a guy? in the middle of diffusion?”
“no. my roommate lmao”
“and what? is it me or your roomma—”
“—my roommate” you glance back up at the prof without looking at him
“ouch”
“you dare?”
“if i don’t dare, who will”
and due to this exchange, you miss the osmosis slide
“ah shit what was osmosis again”
“lmfao what makes u think i know that”
(pause)
“isn't it just.. net movement of free water molecules from an area of high concentration to an area of low concentration”
sorry my bio neural pathways are being excited again after being revisited for the first time in two years
/stares at him/ “why was that infuriating to hear from u”
after class you prepare to head to your dreaded 3-hour lab class you have with donghyuk but he stands up and stares into the void blankly
“where am i going”
“where do u think”
“oh, hell, most likely”
you scoff at the accuracy and drag him out of the lecture hall
you look at donghyuk and he’s visibly resisting the urge to poke your cheek when he first puts on his gloves
“what’s with you today”
he stares at his hands forlornly, “idk ask that to my timetable”
“week 4 got u dead huh”
he glances at you with a frown, “don’t act like u’re not dying too”
“damn. touché”
to your dismay, the lab class runs later than scheduled and you get out of it 20 minutes after it was meant to finish but luckily it’s your last class
with a quick goodbye to donghyuk and a text letting dy/n know you were going to be a lil late, u stop by ur dorm to pick up ur textbook before rushing to the library
you were highkey exhausted and just. famished by that point
but a promise is a promise and you weren’t going to back out of one now
especially when you felt like you owed your roommate one and it was you who originally suggested a library session
so you get to the library, bag strap slung over your shoulder, checking the photo of the seats dy/n had saved for you in the library
highkey getting lost once or twice but you manage
you get to the general area and spot dy/n sitting at a four-seater (wow how’d they get that) but you
freeze when you see who’s sitting next to her
it’s ??
????????
????????????????
/error 404/
????????????????
????????
ur heart goes into panic mode bc
it’s not even kidding it’s donghyuk’s roommate
and despite ur brain short-circuiting
you manage to remember that dy/n had said that mentioned her friend’s.. roommate.. also coming along..
and if her friend was donghyuk’s.. roommate..
you: :                             )
you: oh my god they were roommates
and speak of the devil
“oh hey fancy seeing u here”
you turn around and it’s donghyuk legit chills right there
you barely reply a “hi”
“i thought u were going to ur dorm for dinner”
“ah yeah—no i’m.. gonna go over some.. diffusion”
“oii! over here dude” his roommate whisper-yells out at donghyuk
dy/n waves at you “heYY my/n”
donghyuk waves and turns back to you “welp i’m gonna join a study group.. you could join if you came alone? i’m sure they won’t mind”
“about that”
“u waiting for someone?”
“i’m going over there too”
“what?”
he glances over at the table and then back to you
“that’s my roommate. right there next to your roommate”
you point her out and then donghyuk’s jaw drops
“what the fUC—” and you both. burst iinto laughter at the ridiculousness of the situation
like ?? how???
“wOW r u KIDDING”
“HOW DOES THIS HAPPEN”
“talk about a coincidence.. oh my god my cheekbones hurt” he says as he clutches his side
so you get to the table and dy/n tries to introduce u to donghyuk’s roommate
“mark, this is my/n, my/n this is mark”
ah yes so mark is his name, you think
cute name for a cute boi
“nice to meet you again, mark”
dy/n: “?? again?”
mark gives u a rlly wide smile “yeah we’ve met. hi my/n”
you swear you’ve never had your heart flutter like this
fdksoafjadgioarigilf
then mark introduces dy/n to donghyuk and they start talking about how they’re your legal guardian and telling the other to “get in line”
leaving you in middle like “ok mum and dad” but also thinking back to when donghyuk was highkey flirting with you,, and now how he’s flirting with dy/n ,, oh dude he’s flirting
and highkey ,,, you don’t have any hard feelings about it ,, you know she’s also got this kind of humour code and she’s far more comfortable with meeting new people
until dy/n jokes about custody rules and donghyuk replies with “who says we’re split”
ok mum and dad
n e ways you came to study and study you will
so you settle down and go through your notes for the day
albeit being a lil distracted by mark who sits right across from you somehow, somewhy,,
somewhy should be a word you can’t tell me how to english
you keep wanting to steal glances at him but you have to physically restrain yourself from doing so
and also donghyuk who keeps poking u under the table and texting u even though he’s right next to you
💩hyuk: bro
💩hyuk: bro
💩hyuk: bro
💩hyuk: bro
💩hyuk: bro
you: wHAT
💩hyuk: nvm lol
you: im boutta slap u. give me my pen back i saw that
💩hyuk: damn
💩hyuk: also r u hungry
you: terribly
you: why
💩hyuk: does ur roommate have any allergies
you: not that i know of
you: again
you: why
you: u buyin?
💩hyuk: 🤡<- you
💩hyuk: 🤡, how do you feel about dinner
you: invalid question. no variable answer
💩hyuk: alright, 🤡. im not buying for u
you glower at him but he isn’t looking at u,, he leans back and laments about how he’s craving chinese food
did he read your damn mind how did he know
and apparently he’s read dy/n’s mind too at how she jumps up at the mention of chinese and agrees profusely
so you find yourself abandoning your studies for the rest of the night and in a restaurant lmfao
“chill,, guys,,, jjajang is fine”
rock paper scissors for the cheque ends in mark’s tears
“no it’s ok. i’m ok it’s our first meeting as a fateful group and it makes sense! for me to pay”
after you satisfy your cravings the boys walk dy/n and you back to your dorm
mark tells dy/n to give him her bag for him to carry and while she practically gives it up to him, he has to insist that he’ll carry yours too
to which you’re like omg no it’s fine i can carry it it’s not that heavy i swear—
until donghyuk takes ur bag off ur shoulder and passes it to mark
because of the narrow path, you’re forced to walk in pairs and you end up walking next to donghyuk who makes happy sounds about how good that food was and how priceless mark’s face was when he lost rock paper scissors
then dy/n takes the initiative to make a group chat for you four,, asking for donghyuk’s number to add
you give her a look like damn gurl but you have no idea if she saw or if she just ignored you on purpose lmfao
also donghyuk looked way too happy afterwards
either way you slapped her when you got back to the dorm like “SINCE WHEN WERE YOU SO ?? BRAVE?”
dy/n: um
dy/n: honey
dy/n: have you met me
and thus the chaos of a group chat was born and just like a real child, you spent hours on it
dy/n 🦁: ok we inside
you: thanks for dinner again mark!
💩hyuk: he says you’re welcome
💩hyuk: i say we “accidentally” lose our purses next time we go out
you: nah you’re paying next
💩hyuk: y
💩hyuk: y, 🤡
dy/n 🦁: yes y, 🤡
dy/n 🦁: HAHAH WHY IS SHE 🤡
💩hyuk: i thought you of all people would know
dy/n 🦁: why is she just as dumb in class as she is in the dorm?
💩hyuk: i knew it
dy/n 🦁: she poured too much hot water into her tea the other day it overflowed and spilt onto her foot
mark: oh no were u okay
💩hyuk: looks like you’re gonna have to study osomsis
💩hyuk: osmoiss
💩hyuk: fuck
you: yes i’m okay it wasn’t that hot i had socks on too
💩hyuk: osmosis
dy/n 🦁: avoided tragedy luckily
💩hyuk: finally
you: there is a reason you’re saved as 💩hyuk on my phone
dy/n 🦁: HAAHAHAHAHHAHAH
seriously you just don’t know just how much this group was going to mean to you yet
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click here to meet your soulmate, paediatrics!donghyuk!
II ⇤ | III | ⇥ IV
shoot me an ask if you’d like to be tagged in future parts!
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clockworkfall · a year ago
Note
You don't even need to suggest asking for that list because I've already astral projected the request into your ask box
darcy (is it alright if i call you darcy?) you have given me so many gifts i am Vibrating bc of this 
ok so - the official list of everything i personally despise the hobbit movies for and i am right things can be added to the list but i will not retract anything due to the fact that again im right also these aren’t in any particular order other than maybe the most grievous stuff will be last for the drama of it all and ive probably forgotten some things bc the last time i watched these movies was when they came out
also this is my personal favourite edition of the misty mountains song and technically it also has part of durin’s song in it but it sounds really cool and it is the appropriate 20 minute length
anyway. the list. i wasn't going to put a cut in but im only through my complaints with the first movie and its already very long so uhhh just a warning that this is extensive
where the fuck is the singing. in the book almost every single chapter has at least one song in it. the movie had two songs and they were not done properly i dont care for any of it
establish the baggins character!! they dont do it!! yes i understand that its a movie and they cant spend every second on every detail but i think its important that we know why thorin & co. underestimate bilbo at first other than We Are Dwarves And He Is A Hobbit like they d i d have that one bit where bilbo faints at the beginning and then sleeps through the dwarves leaving but still. sure i  already know he is a largely respectable baggins with a tookish side but the people who havent read the book dont
singing complaint pt 2 see above
gandalf should have left more he isn't there like half the time do i want to see him more yes but give the company the chance to have character development
why is radagast here. give me one reason for radagast.
ok. i have to put them here bc im kind of going in plot order and i am looking at the wikipedia for these movies bc i am obligated to include everything but im not watching those movies again so here is one of my Top Three Things That Almost Made Me Walk Out Of Theatre: why the ever loving f u c k are there orcs. they aren’t in the book. they aren’t a problem for these people at this point in time in middle earth. there should not be orcs in this story. 
also why are we talking about the necromancer and sauron and seeing the council there is a reason we dont see whatever the fuck gandalf is up to in the book. also they went to rivendell as a stop in the journey not because they were being chased by orcs. there are not orcs in this story. im moving on because im upset
also im pretty sure elrond doesn’t  point out the durin’s day thing they figure it out later he just translates please let the dwarves be smart they arent but let them know their own holidays
there should be more riddles this chapter in the book is called riddles in the dark the riddles are right there you could take them verbatim from the book
fucking. a z o g. he exists and is mentioned Once in the book. he is a goblin. why did they make him an orc. there are not. supposed. to be. orcs.
 ok the tree battle with the wargs happens but. its just wargs. wargs are not just Horses But Evil So Theyre Wolves. they are their own whole situation and yea they ally with the goblins later but this fight has nothing to do with orcs
there should be More between thorin and bilbo also a general note that the dwarves should have chemistry let me see them have fun together also the thrush waking up smaug is bullshit but that's less important
ok. im going to try to shut up about the orcs. orc complaint pt 102489248 see above
shut up about the necromancer shut up about the necromancer stop showing us what gandalf is doing that's his business not the story of the hobbit also why was there a message from galadriel about the nazgul this is the hobbit 
i want more book beorn that man is incredible we should have had more of him movie beorn is fine i just want more
show me the illusions of elves feasting its such a cool part and it gives us a reason for the dwarves to go off the path other than Lost
also that one river show us why mirkwood is dangerous
i dont think that whole dropping the ring and killing whatever the fuck that was happens. also bilbo doesnt understand the ring and he shouldn't like it sucks for him but its important that he doesnt understand
thorin is captured first and the dwarves later and none of them are captured by tauriel and legolas. namely because neither of them are in this book.
a note about tauriel: tolkien should have more female characters but the way to go about this in an adaptation is not just throwing one in so kili can have a love interest also i fucking. despise. that subplot.
that whole confrontation doesnt happen but thranduil is rad so i dont mind t o o much but still. give thorin character other than Angry And Prideful
gandlafs business complaint pt 20942098 see above
orc complaint pt 203984395 see above
ok also the kili being wounded and poisoned or whatever makes me so fucking mad shut up about tauriel why is legolas here like i cant remember he might be shot by the elven guards but im pretty sure that whole river battle doesnt happen its just unpleasant bc theyre travelling in barrels
ok i checked the book im right that scene is horseshit why did we have to have it. if you tell the story as written you dont need to add random drama its literally right there
gandalfs business complaint pt 982347349 this story is only a prequel to the lot in the sense that it happens before it and bilbo gets the ring but that is it
kili being poisoned complaint pt 3 this is bullshit
we dont know any of this shit about bard yet im pretty sure we dont even know bard at this point but thorin and co. certainly dont
bard nonsense complaint pt 2. this is preemptive i think its third movie bullshit
they spend so much longer at the secret entrance also bilbo is sent to scout not get the arkenstone he isn't even told about it at this point im pretty sure
also thorin should be talking more half of his character is tolkien reminding us that he just does not stop talking
none of the shit at the end of this movie is right. shut up about orcs. stop talking about bard and making his life more complicated than it is. there is no molten gold or chase within the mountain smaug realizes bilbo stole a cup and leaves the mountain in a rage and smashes the area of the mountain with the door and thorin and co. are trapped inside none of this shit happens yes he goes off to destroy esgaroth but jesus not like this he goes back to the mountain first and then the conversation with bilbo happens
also the second movie is called the desolation of smaug which sounds like it refers to smaugs death but that doesnt happen in this movie and if it is actually meant to be the desolation smaug causes that also isn't shown in this movie
things are not this complicated for bard he's just great move on stop talking about his family
shut up about tauriel and legolas pt 308430
also stop making esgaroth so complicated it isn't the master of the town sucks and the people like bard so he is in charge its not difficult
the whole third movie is fucking stupid and i hate it more than the other two combined and i do not have the patience to go through the stupid plot of this terrible movie so i am going to sum up (also the princess bride slaps i was reminded of the the let me explain no time bit which is *chefs kiss* anyway back to terrible things)
also this movie should have only been as long as it was bc it dealt with thorin and keeping everyone out of the mountain and not the battle the main character was knocked out for the man wasn’t there
shut up about the fucking orcs they arent in this movie there is not final battle with azog shut up i fucking hate it here this isn't how thorin dies and fili and kill die defending him bc hes their uncle kili doesnt die defending fucking tauriel i cannot stand it here
also the whole thranduil business is blown way out of proportion
this battle is stupid and wrong and i hate it you can tell that this part is far from the book bc ive stopped trying to explain cause there are close to zero similarities and it would take too long
beorn does show up but again. why is radagast here.
this movie makes me want to scream im so upset like thorin and fili and kili dying already makes me so upset but they did them all so dirty i hate it here
if you want a more coherent and detailed Everything I Fucking Hate About This Stupid Fucking Movie i think the only way anyone will get that would be watching the movie with me and i will only watch that movie with someone who will be just as upset as i am and thats that
anyway this has been thrilling i love few things more than being able to talk about how movies ruined books this has been a gift even if i sound like im about to commit murder i just. hate these movies with a passion
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firelord-frowny · a year ago
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LET ME TELL YOU ALL about the frustrating Food Week i had omfg. 
so. Sunday. 
My mommy and I decide we want pizza. The pizza hut is offering that whole ~contactless curbside pickup~ thing, so we take advantage of that. We’ve ordered that way once before - no issues. So we order online. Go to pick up the pizza a half hour later. The line is HELLA LONG. Like 20 people on foot lined up out the door (6 feet apart, of course), and another 6ish people waiting in their cars by the curb. 
So we call to let them know we’re there, and immediately run into a fuckton of confusion, bc the person who answered wasn’t actually an employee at the store - they were an employee at an off-site pizza hut call center. So, the lady assumes we’re calling to place an order, and after getting all the info about our vehicle color and model, she’s like, “ok you can go ahead with your order.” And my mom is like, “...wat??” and she’s like “You can go ahead with your order.” And my mom is like!!! “...Wat? No, we’re here to pick UP our order.” And then instead of just being like “oh oops okay,” the lady goes, “Oh, well, YOU didn’t SAY that at the beginning. You didn’t make that CLEAR.” And then my mom is like, “No, YOU didn’t make YOURself clear!” And I’m like!!!! Oh my fucking god, both of you made a reasonable assumption about the other’s understanding, you both just happened to be wrong, it’s no one’s fault, just a miscommunication, please just say “oops” and move on!! So the lady finally says she’s gonna let the store know we’re waiting, and then my mom is like “so do we wait in the parking lot or at the curb?” and the lady is like “they know what your car looks like” and my mom is like!!!! “...Do we wait in the parking lot or at the curb?” AND SHE’S LIKE “they have the make and model for your car.” AND MY MOM IS LIKE??????? OKAY BYE, THANKS FOR LITERALLY NOTHING! and she hung up. And I mean, in the lady’s defense, she obviously didn’t know the answer because she doesn’t actually work at that location, but like... she really should have just said that lmao. “Sorry, I’m not sure, I’m actually stationed off-site, so I’m not sure what that store’s specific rules are.” Done! The end! No problem! But whatever. 
Okay so, my mom decides to wait in the parking lot, but several minutes later, no one has come out, so I’m like, ok, I guess we’re supposed to be at the actual curb, I guess it’s a literaly CURBside pickup. So we go to the curb. A few minutes later, somebody comes out with our order, and we’re like yaaay, and we go home. 
So, due to covid paranoia, I always completely reheat food from restsaurants in the oven before i eat them, so, i get a big ol pan ready to put the pizza in, open up the box, and LO AND BEHOLD IT’S THE WROOOOOONG PIZZA AND THE WROOOOONG SIDE DISH!!! We ordered a plain ol cheese pizza and chicken alfredo pasta... we recieved a pineapple/pepperoni/sausage/thin crust pizza, and buffalo wings. I SCREAM AN ANGUISH SCREAM!!
So my mommy calls them back like 3 times before finally getting somebody who works at the actual store and not somebody at a call center. She’s like “hi, you gave us the wrong pizza” and they were like “OH NOOOOOO” and the lady was real apologetic and sweet and she’s like “are you still outside?” and my mom is like “no, we’re at home.” and the lady is like, “would you still like to come pick up your order?” and my mom is like! “no, we were just there to pick it up, we don’t want to leave the house again.” and the lady is like “okay, i can just cancel the whole order for you, ma’am, i’m so sorry about this” 
AND MY MOM IS LIKE “i mean, can somebody bring it to where we are??” and the lady is all GASP, i have NEVER thought of that, let me go ask God. and so she puts her on hold and then a few minutes later she comes back like, “ok ma’am, yes, we’ll have someone come deiver it.” so we give her the address, and that’s that. 
like two hours later, still no pizza, so my mom calls back like “hi, is the pizza coming soon?” and they’re like “uh we dropped it off like an hour and a half ago” 
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so my mom looks out on the porch and there on the lil table is a cold-ass box of pizza and pasta that’s been sitting there for 90 whole minutes because THEY NEITHER RANG THE DOORBELL  NOR CALLED TO TELL US THEY WERE THERE OMFG. 
But i wasn’t super bothered bc i was gonna reheat it in the oven, anyway. 
so, i put everything in the oven, 
AND THEN I FUCKING BURNED IT. I BUUUUUURNED IT ALL!!!!! OH! MY!!! GOD!!!!!!! 
Thankfully it was not burned to a CRISP, but it was mightily ~browned~, though still very edible. But wow what a FUCKING ordeal. 
AND THEN!!!!!!
Monday. 
I want some crab cakes. The grocery store we order from has crab meat on sale. So I do an instacart order for just crab meat and breadcrumbs, and I specify that if the crab meat is out of stock, just cancel the whole order, I’m anticipating the crab meat being out of stock since it’s on sale, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed. 
So, I’m watching the app, and then I see the crab meat get checked off with a green lil check! And I’m like AWYEAH AWYEAH AWYEAH!!! Then they get the breadcrumbs, but have to replace it with another brand - no biggie, that’s fine. 
I get the notification that they’re checking out, and then I get the notification that they’re on the way. 
THEN I GET A FUCKING NOTIFICATION THAT THE CRAB MEAT HAS BEEN REFUNDED!!!! 
I’M LIKE!!!! WHAT?????
So I message the lady like “hi! what happened with the crab meat?” 
and she’s like! “im sorry, i made a mistake. i thouught i had grabbed the ones you ordered, but they were the wrong ones, and it turns out the ones you wanted are out of stock, im sorry.” 
So i’m like! SIGH! I’m so disappointed and frustrated, but not at her, bc i mean, it happens, and it’s no big deal, so i’m just like, “aw, thanks for trying, then!” and asked her to cancel the rest of the order, and she did. 
So now i’m all heartbroken about crab meat and I’m hungry and i have to eat SOMETHING, and SO THEN i decide, WAIT, maybe Wegmans has it.
now, the shit thing about wegmans is that their crab meat is FIFTY FUCKING DOLLARS PER POUND compared to the 17ish per pound at any other store on earth. but i NEED crab cakes at this point, like, i REQUIRE IT. So i recruit my mommy and im like, hey mommy, if i get two things of this crab meat that’s 44 dollars each, and then use the $20-off code you have, and then i pay for $50 of it while you cover the rest, can i put this wegman’s order on your credit card?
and she was like uh ok. So i did that. total came out to 70 something, including the breadcrumbs, and I covered 50something of it. 
BUT WOMP FUCKING WOMP, I PLACED THE ORDER TOO LATE SO THEY WERE GONNA HAVE TO BRING IT THE NEXT DAAAAAAY. 
So im DEVASTATED but im like ok, this isn’t so bad, i can still eat something yummy tonight, i can make some french fries. 
but then im like NO, that’s unhealthy, i’m gonna make a smoothie and put some spinach in it. 
So i’m looking for the lil cups and the blade that go with the blender and i cant find them ANYWHERE!!!!! and my mom is yelling at me like ~thats what you get for not putting them back in the right place~ AND IM ILKE!!!! I DIDN’T PUT THEM ANYWHERE I HAVEN’T USED IT IN LIKE A MONTH AND I ALWAYS PUT THEM WHERE THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO GO!!!!
so turns out my dad, like the fucking imbecile he chooses to be, had decided to do the dishes for the First And Only Time in like 18 months, and managed to put EVERYTHING in an incorrect location, as if he hasn’t been living here for 30 fucking years, and not only did he put the non-fancy silverware in the fancy drawer and the fancy-silverware in the non-fancy-drawer, but he ALSO bitched at and condescended to my mom when she told him he mixed them up and kept saying she was wrong, and that he ~doesn’t care what she says because [he] ‘knows the truth’~ (what the ACTUAL FUCK IS WRONG WITH HIM) and then in typical Giant Baby Man fashion, he stomped off like ~oh wah, i guess ill just never ever do the dishes again~ LIKE BITCH YOU NEVER DO THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE, FUCK OFF. 
anyway, the blender cups and blades were in the fucking pantry with the cereal. because that makes so much sense. 
so i FINALLY have all the belnder stuff ready, got my cup, got my juice, got my chia seeds, got my frozen strawberries, my frozen bananas, my fresh spinach, all i need now is the frozen blueberries, which are CRUCIAL because they mask the taste of the spinach enough that i can put a lot of spinach in and still be able to stomach it. so im lookin for my blueberries. 
MOM WHERE ARE MY BLUEBERRIES???
she’s like! “oh, there were only a little bit left.” 
I’M LIKE!!! 
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, IT WAS A FULL BAG AND I ONLY USED LIKE A QUARTER CUP OF THEM.
AND SHE”S LIKE
“oh, ive been putting them in my oatmeal every day, sorry” 
I SCREEEEEEEAAAM, IM DEVASTATED
I PUT ALL THE SMOOTHIE THINGS AWAY AND I SLICE UP SOME FUCKIN POTATOES TO DEEP FRY SOME FRENCH FRIES AT 1:30 IN THE MORNING!!!!!
and when i go to bed im like. IF THE FUCKING CRAB MEAT DOESNT COME TOMORROW I AM GOING TO COMMIT CRIMES 
but it came!!!! 
and tomorrow was yesterday so i made 8 crab cakes for ~the fam~ and i ate two of them, and now TODAY im gonna make FOUR ENORMOUS CRAB CAKES just for ME and eat ALL OF THEM and i am SO excited.
the end. 
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papas-cheeseria-gay · a year ago
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audie is iconic... i love that peppy villagers are just kinda weird. audie told me she played super chef rpg IV and i love that. i dont really hate any of my villagers though i did have judy and kinda. moved her out bc i didnt like her that much. who are your villagers? - amii
yessss peppy villagers are honestly the most dynamic and interesting villagers! i love them. also thanks for asking about my villagers
i’m gonna compile a list of my villagers that are on my island right now:
Audie, Goldie and Chops are my fav villagers probably. all of them 10/10. Chops may seem odd and kinda entitled at first, but he’s actually super sweet and just likes to give off his own confidence onto you, it’s nice. he’s also the GNC icon of the island. i gave him a silky dress and he said “i’ll wear anything that looks amazing” like yes king. Audie, as i said, is just the quirky girl, but in the best way ever. she told me she collects figurines, they are probably anime merch. and like idk if i have to say anything about Goldie, she’s just precious and i ship her so much with Margie. speaking of, Margie, Tia, Walker and Paula are also very high up on my fav villager list. Margie moved to me after i visited someone’s island and i HC her as indian and there is nothing that can change that. Tia was a lucky find on a mystery island. i stumbled upon a bunch of cute villagers and i actually took a solid 20 minutes contemplating whether to take her or not because i was just so excited about her. Paula was one of the villagers that you get at the beginning (along with drift, but he is long gone since, nobody misses him) and like, idk if all of the big sisters are like that, but she has issues. and that is not to say that they make her a bad person, because she acknowledges her issues and actually works on them. she once told me that whenever she’s angry she looks up into the sky until she feels calm again and that is just such a healthy coping mechanism, i respect her a lot for that.
now Walker is a bit complicated, because i also have Biskit on my island. he was there for a long time, but both he and Walker are lazy type dog villagers. and honestly, they feel like the same character. i once caught them having a conversation and they had the same level of intelligence as the davinki twins. they are just very dumb together. i do like Walker a lot more than Biskit though, for the simple reason that my animal crossing character is based on my OC Owen. and one of Owen’s boyfriend’s names is Glenn Walker, and i just find that so much more endearing. it’s just canon that Walker has to stay at this point lmao. so yeah, i’m planning to move Biskit out.
moving on to the lowest of the low: Vladimir. he moved onto my island and i’ve forgot that he existed ever since then. like sometimes he’ll run up to me to teach me a reaction and that’s that. nobody interacts with him, and istg he ONLY wears a bath towel when he’s outside. it’s kinda creepy
the real problem child of the island is Eloise. ever since she joined our community she has been a problem. literally, she insulted Paula’s style, got into MULTIPLE fights with Chops and insulted Walker. just insulted him in general? his intelligence? he told her a funny joke that involved her because he is an innocent baby and she just went crazy on him and threw a temper tantrum like the diva she is. her exact words were "ok my turn. what do you (Walker) and a used pencil have in common?" and then she had the audacity to add: "feel free to take your time. you might get it eventually." the worst part is that poor innocent Walker didn’t even notice her insulting him and he keeps hanging out with her. i may be a bit too petty towards Eloise, but i have a deep connection with most of my villagers and if she thinks she can ruin my island life then she deserves it. idk i’m probs taking the game too seriously tho lol i plan on moving her out, but at the same time i can’t seem to let go of her? idk, she enrages me, she makes me cry, but i keep her around. i’m gonna have to work that out
i’ve got some other villagers that i had a history with (mainly Cousteau, Lolly and Rory, the first of which indirectly caused drama and made me rethink my relationship with Chops for a hot minute this morning), and if you want to hear about them i can tell you smth about them too ^^ sorry if this is a little long
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honeybunchcalum · 2 years ago
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50 questions you've never been asked before
Ok so no one tagged me in this, but I saw @wastethen8 answer these, and they’re pretty cool questions!
1. what is the colour of your hair brush? I actually don’t have a hairbrush bc I never brush my hair (it’s curly so that wouldn’t work out too well)
2. name of a food you never eat? mayonnaise 
3. are you typically too warm or too cold? always too hot 
4. what were you doing 45 minutes ago? watching ‘Dave’ on Hulu bc I love that show
5. what's your favourite candy bar? plain Hershey’s
6. have you ever been to a professional sports event? yep! 
7. what is the last thing you said out loud? oh my god bc my cat dropped something
8. what is your favorite ice cream? turkey hill mint choco chip (any other brand is pitiful compared to this one)
9. what is the last thing you had to drink? water
10. do you like your wallet? yeah! it looks like a wallet my mom had from the 90s, which is cool 
11. what was the last thing you ate? mint chocolate chip ice cream haha
12. did you buy any new clothes last week? nope
13. last sporting event you watched? a few minutes of the draft bc a few players from my college were drafted!
14. what's your favourite flavour of popcorn? butter
15. who was the last person you sent a message to? a friend talking about linkedin haha
16. ever go camping? YES and I fucking hated it. I went cabin camping with Girl Scouts and we got lost at night in the woods trying to get there, the cabin was gross, and I burned 8 of my fingers on a makeshift Bunsen burner :/
17. do you take vitamins? yes
18. do you go to church every sunday? no, but I try to pray anyway 
19. do you have a tan? no I literally never tan 
20. do you prefer chinese food or pizza? pizza for sure
21. do you drink soda with a straw? I don’t actually drink soda
22. what colour socks do you wear? black or gray, but I have some fun ones
23. do you ever drive above the speed limit? I dont really drive, but during my test I didnt and the first time I failed bc I took too long to turn and check for cars
24. what terrifies you? a lot, but mostly sickness (especially vomiting) bc I cant control it 
25. look to your left, what do you see? my headphones
26. what chore do you hate? putting away laundry
27. what do you think of when you hear an australian accent? 5sos ofc, mainly Luke bc I hear his accent the most 
28. what's your favourite soda? sprite I guess bc ive actually never had any other kind 
29. do you go into fast food places or drive thru? typically go in 
30. who was the last person you talked to? my mom
31. favourite cut of beef? skirt steak is my fav...so that?
32. last song you listened to? Monsters- All Time Low & blackbear
33. last book you read? A Thousand Splendid Suns- Khaled Hosseini for class and I actually liked it a lot
34. can you say the alphabet backwards? Im not gonna try, but I hope I can 😂
35. how do you like your coffee? depends..if I make it at home, just black, but at a coffee shop I love cold brew with flavor or a latte
36. favourite pair of shoes? my black booties that look like the ones Shawn and Luke wear 
37. the time you normally go to bed? 2? 3? 4?
38. the time you normally wake up? for class, minutes before 9 when my class starts 
39. what do you prefer, sunrise or sunset? sunset
40. how many blankets are on your bed? 2 
41. describe your kitchen plates? weird question... but they’re white with a teal trim on the edges and a rose
42. do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage? not yet, but definitely not beer 
43. do you play cards? no 
44. what colour is your car? I dont have one of my own :(
45. can you change a tire? possibly I’d be able to figure it out if I had to 
46. your favourite province? like of New York city? state as in U.S. state? I’ve only been to Manhattan so I’ll go with that 
47. favourite job you've had? the one I have on campus :(
48. how did you get your biggest scar? It’s not really a scar but it’s under my chin bc ive gotten stitches there twice. The second time was when I was camping with Girl Scouts (again) and I was on a seesaw with my friend. My side didnt have handles, so when my friend went down I shot up fell forward on my chin. I was known around the camp for being the reason the seesaw was shut down 😂, also another reason I hate camping
49. favourite day of the week? Thursday or Friday 
50. what did you do today that made someone happy? I was sitting outside and texted my mom that I saw a bunny
Tagging whoever sees this and wants to do it! I hope you enjoyed my rambling and random answers
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thehotterspiderman · 2 years ago
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i watched all 20 episodes of spy kids: mission critical in about a week and here are my thoughts (3/5)
1.9
i havent watched this in like 2 days i dont even remember what happened last time
why is everything in the desert the desert sucks
alsjhiajgdf i love tom kenny
listen i know hes like a superandroid or whatever but i really hope he and therese fall in love
wait hold up. i thought they already had midterms???? like the did that before scorpion went to her fashion shoot. AND they were kupkakkes midterms. whats up with this school
no drinking in class???? rude. let them hydrate
that seems imbalanced
aHh
thats only like 10
also that book is dummy thicc
its ok ace my nose whistles too
shut up carmen youre just jealous because shes pretty
there are no seasons its a desert
ok dude stop breathing so hard
he JUST said that
anywhere between an hour and umm... 11 months
you put it on one page why are all the pages back
me but with physics
thats literally the best line in the whole series
juni how do you not know that you were at a safe H O U S E
theyve been gone for like 2 hours are they not allowed to study?????
what even is AWOL???
absent without leave. neat
talon gives off some big draco energy
tick tock???? how dare you
slkdhfa she called sir awesome honey shes such a mom
dont make it obvious
oh look they made it obvious
roll credits
i was in cleveland when i watched this episode - well actually i left that day - and i was s h o o k e t h
also hes right. no spy would be in cleveland. theres 3 buildings
oh me too
right bc shes the only “I.A.”
ew
eW
this isnt HARRY POTTER. or maybe it is. talon is a hardcore draco
oh right bc swearing is for Men™
update tumblr decided to break AGAIN (im boutta cry btw) so we lost about 5 minutes from the end of 1.9 and 7 from the beginning of 1.10
1.10
its a DOORBELL do they not have those in the outback steakhouse
lots of people. doofenshmirtz, other people who i cant think of right now, etc
???? no it wont????
did your troop leader not give you The Talk??? you NEVER go in the customers house
ace no. youre allowed to not buy treats
theres a triforce on her vest, too
shes just gonna go to another house yall. shell be f i n e
oh my God shes holding hands with mauly im gonna c r y
yeah its called saliva
nope only scorpion lives in a castle
stop bringing up spy sense and tell him you saw her glare at you
HES ALLOWED TO LIKE FOOD
how do you know that he doesnt have his phone if YOU dont know where it is and HE cant tell you
i love how she says "floor. ceiling. more thumb"
haha i found the birth of venus
oh and the creation of adam
hes like squidward, which would make sense bc goldies voiced by tom kenny who voices spongebob
"sebastian oliver" "shadow operative" S.O. nice
why do you have a trailblazers badge. youre 4. i didnt get one til i was a cadette
also sebastian???? isnt that the toymakers first name????? you cant have 2 sebastians
also why do you have braces. youre still 4
"SIR MEANIE FACE" IF SOMEONE SAID THAT TO ME ID BE D E V A S T A T E D
SCORPION LET HER CRY SHES F O U R
so really, spy sense DID help
oooooh, sentry duty, thats gotta hurt
WHAT THE H E C K YOURE F O U R
she looks like frickin plushtrap
aCE NO YOURW GONNA D I E
oh trust me they hurt me more than you know
dude theyre so thin youre f i n e
eh, still worked
clicking her teeth together so hard must H U R T
i think she can get out of there. also shes concussed now
why was that so quiet. why did it get louder
thats not a y shape
no, they spy kids
oh shiitake mushrooms thats what THEY said
whenever they say pinnoquinoxx i always think of pinnochio
ahdhhsjak i miss pizza parties 😔
well now we ALL expect it
also, no one????? pick a cooler code name. your regular name was cool and now youve ruined it
2.1
oh theres finally a skip intro option. im not taking it
stop saying that its weird
EWWWWWW CRUSTY THATS SO G R O S S
haha shes shopping w the goon. love that
oh yeah i didnt get to tell yall yet but i absolutely h a t e gablet
a lot of people, juni
listen i know a jt (but he doesnt go by jt) and uhhhhhhh were not gonna go there
why are you happy. what about second semester makes you so happy
boi thats a tardis
the design on his hoverboard looks like the aperture science logo
i paused to read the Floops label and it says "fried corn and sugar loop shaped breakfast substitute, net wt. 13 oz" ITS NOT EVEN A CEREAL ITS A BREAKFAST SUBSTITUTE IM C R Y I N G
listen i know hes technically scorpions dad but i dont think he can legally be in the dorm rooms
aww, thats sweet
i dont think gablet has an attached printer
gablet always sounds like shes mocking people
oh dear God its dolores umbridge
haha nerd
awesome no im gonna die
whenever carmen yells she sounds like link
ok so i didnt find a reason why she sounds like link but i DID find that theyre making a wherea waldo tv series so uhhhh thats fun
why does the cat have a bandaid
GABLET S T O P
OH!!!!!! ON THE WALL!!!!!!! ITS THE TUMBLR POST WITH THE FORK AND KNIFE ETIQUETTE PICTURE!!!!! YOU KNOW THE ONE!!!!!
oh no fart jokes
its even the basic fart sound effect
BAHAHAH MY PHONE VIBRATED AT THE SAME TIME HE FARTED THAT WAS WEIRD
oh no i hate him
stop SLURPING
uh yeah???? you heard them yelling about it
how??? does that work??? you cant just like catch electricity in a cup.... can you???? i havent studied it since 4th grade
oh worm??
goldies such a boomer
worm??
psi shouldnt be at the drawing board right now. he also shouldnt be confused
what happened to the lasers
wait nvm we havent gotten to that episode yet
ace is valid, dark is Scary
im gonna punch gablet in the face
that doesnt sound realistic
do you not have stairs??????
dont you mean inside AND out??
that flashlight did NOTHING
how did it die so fast?????
who else would you be talking to??
isnt that bowser from the mario movie we dont speak of??
i havent gotten a chance to tell yall but i absolutely love clemp. hes such a mood
hes the greatest spy
does it use a mini transmooker???? ig it doesnt bc gablet works but thatd be lit
SEE SHES IMMORTAL
me when i see something interesting
ME WHEN IM NOT ON MY PHONE
i dont think you can legally say that
you killed her
me
wow nice promo
also just???? bring a charger????? like youre the tech girl why do you not have one at all times
how?????? did you go so fast
machete electric bubbles??? nice
just task manager him
mother of all boards sounds like it could be a cuss...mother of all fuckers
also throwback to 1.7 when she says "his ai firewalled his motherboard" i keep expecting her to say "his ai firewalled this motherfucker"
yes i said keep ive watched that episode too many times to count
worm??
why did you giggle and make a flirty pose. are yall supposed to get together???
did you????? kill him????????? holy shit
2.2
thats what my dad does. he loves hospital corners
idc what it is you have a bazooka
ok if it was a spider id get it, australia has some deadly ones, but does it have deadly ants too???? like is that a Thing????
also ants in your room are gross
was that just a cameo??? i dont remember what happens in this one
haha because he said grapevines and wine has dregs and wine is made of grapes
for the boys??? thats so cute
listen idc how evil you are EVERYONE should cry over otters
so one of the parents has a sister or sister in law named roxanna..... hmmm.......
if you dont use your turn signal h*ck u
hes gonna D I E
i just looked at my shoe and i think theres blood on it???? what the h*ck
suspicious??? about.... what???? having fears???? not being perfect?????
juni that was awful wording
JUNI WHAT DID YOU D O TO HIM
like i know what he DID but the way it plays out makes it seem like something significant
i thought his name was heavy meddle not.... deth metal???? thats how the subtitles spell it
hahah me
he sounds like bling bling boy
yeah ik im a fool thanks for reminding me
what are you gonna do??? kill juni????
POOR WORD CHOICE JUNI
oh he gives exactly 0 h*cks
a shoe doesnt make that sound
crack bugs?????
see thats why you dont mess with things
im a god among boys??????? what????
did you... kill them????????????
thats any australian person
theyre so stupid i love them
good i hate her
i thought the gunk just like... disappeared from the guitar but actually it shot off
he died... 😔
uhh.... yeah????? was it not obvious?????
me when i have 5 dollars
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tchaikovskaya · 2 years ago
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world’s most annoying petulant whining about stuff i know im wrong for not being more than satisfied with under the cut bc im the woooorst :)))
ok so i took the gre today and i did SUPER well, i took it last year w/o studying and got 160 V/ 163 Q, which happens to be like ~83th %ile for both of them. definitely not bad and served my purposes (i knew i only needed a 300 to get into my undergrad university’s masters program so i didnt bother with buckling down and studying lol) but i know/knew i could do better if i actually prepared for it. so this time i did, and every practice test ive taken has been like mid-low 160s for the verbal and almost never below 167 for the quant. i know theyre not a very faithful measure for the real test because the real thing has the difficulty adaptive scoring algorithm so i didnt reaaaally know what to expect. 
so test day arrives! i did well on both verbal sections, i wasnt agonizing over any of the questions tbh, it went fine. i had 3 quant sections which means one of them was experimental and didnt factor into my score, im almost certain it was the last section bc its difficulty level was generally normal after having a normal one first and a harder (adapted) one second. i am about 99.99% positive that i got every single question in the first quant section correct. i even finished with like 10 minutes left and went back and completely redid the handful of problems i thought were relatively difficult and confirmed my answer. and because of the adaptive difficulty method, since i did so well on the first section, the second section’s questions were ALL at least moderately hard. the jump in difficulty was honestly insane and it really flustered me lmfao.
so i basically ran out of time with 2 questions left, i had 30 seconds left when i finished the 18th of 20 questions. one of them was a question where you had to type in your answer, so i couldnt just pick a random answer choice and have a 1/5 chance of it being right. then i had 10 seconds left and i looked at the last question and it was a “select all choices that apply” question with a full paragraph of text so i was just like lol nope and clicked the answer in the middle thinking here goes nothing. and the section timer ran out and auto-closed the test section literally 1 second after that. so im guaranteed to have gotten at least one wrong, almost certainly at least 2, and most likely 3+ bc the preceding 18 questions were so difficult and time consuming to solve.
so... the tests ends and my scores pop up on the screen and.....
i got a 166.....?
the gre quantitative section’s grading curve is generally much less forgiving than the verbal section’s (i guess a disproportionate number of STEM people take the general gre test? idk) so missing 2 questions means your score drops by 2 or more points (usually more than 2 lol), and i’ll never know for sure thanks to how the adaptive scoring thing that i already mentioned works, but if i’d had time to actually attempt the last two questions and gotten them both right i most likely would have gotten a perfect 170 so lmfao fuck me :)))))
i know that sounds so annoying like boo fucking hoo i scored in the 92nd %ile instead of the 99th :((( woe is me! but its just frustrating knowing that i COULD have, yknow? i feel like if i had finished all the questions and felt good about it and gotten a 166 i’d be over the moon with that
honestly idk what scores i was hoping to get but i really just wanted to break 330, which i accomplished, and i was terrified that my scores would either stay the same or drop the 2nd time so deep down i know im definitely happy with it but :/ ugh
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vitrei · 3 years ago
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7k lads!
jascnbrody said:
ive edited a lot of these actually like. just to take out "likes" or add in when i dnt think i explained smthn well enough. i was rereading one of my replies and a sentence was. like. “like lorem ipsum like dolor sit amet Like, consectetur adipiscing like elit. Like Cras mattis quam like at Like. erat elementum like ultrices.” n i was like............. i cant do that thats unethical thats too many likes..................
ive cut a couple things just bc. tumblr replies have a character limit so i v e sorta tried to keep it short? tho tbh i could probably mainly just say Yea in 20+ single replies and say abt the same of what i do saynmdf. .
i really like the atmosphere and tone of what we do in the shadows. i watched hellsing (the original) like once n i dnt remember anything. except SORT of. the alien man. incognito? the ovas are what i rly like.
berserk is one. i really like. but it is SO long. and its not drawn out well. every time they go to do smthn they get sidetracked by like 20 monsters when they like....... dont Need to be? i really skip over half the chapters bc they just? arent necessary? i stopped watching naruto after sasuke left and skipped str8 into shippudden bc like.. there was no need for any of it. it rly is just milking it.
isnt one piece like.. still going? it Is. i get people like the energy and different look to the art but like..... come on...
i had a tutu i got from belk in middle school that i thought was the end all be all of fashion. insp by the lolita look. i wore it Once or Twice in public which for me is. huge... n i really didnt see? the other fashions until i was older and already set in my like.. comfy wear ways. all of the colors are kinda too attention drawing to me so i cant decorate w em all even tho they are really nice like Objectively u_u
yeah?? like no one rly cares when u say i in place of the pc but i dnt even consider that when i catch myself doing it. i feel like the paul rudd OH SHIT gif when i send a msg thats like that. even if someone Did like. think that me making a character and choosing the Bad Path is indicative of like.... my own personal beliefs im like.......... not friends w anyone like that. so id never talk to someone? who does?
dudes get so defensive over people critiqing violence in video games. (also just. if you say anything . abt anything .) n i do get. the feeling of just pressing play on a movie with a lot of actions but its like........ a movie ive got influence over.. (even if i rly dnt) which is also smthn i cant get from watching a lets play.
i was abt to say like im p sure ive seen people joking abt it but i havent seen anyone serious abt it (i hope). esp considering thats.. thats too many chars to exclude. n yeah. yeah. theyve just got Elements you cant do.. also just. like. either 1 their story is done and their ~relatable~ issues are over or like. 2. its fake. you kno its fake. its easier to think abt fake problems than real problems
i love things like that tho....... i HATE those spoilers specifically even if im like.... ok w spoilers in smthn i still want like.. certain things to be hidden. a shocking character death? id wanna be completely in the dark on
id love to understand poker but i dnt wanna like............. take the time to learn it.... and like football and baseball are SO confusing to me i dnt think ill ever get em. i nearly wish i understood soccer?? thats like the only sport that i like even a little
i have to really really really like someones voice to trust them to narrate a lets play. like a short video, all you need is personality or a fun hook but like... a whole lets play. you gotta sound Soothing. youve got to be GOOD.
trailers arent even want most gamers go off of its like.. what producers say. what devs promise while In Production.. its just like... like youve got to be aware. theyre not being 100% honest and transparent w u. they cant. bc they have to sell the game. its like hr long gameplay videos that are Highly scripted. and Highly spruced up.
ill play both legos and minecraft w my lil sister. shes 5 and she fuckin loves. both. i do appreciate her playing w legos more tho. theyre so much easier for her and Real. she makes a mess but shes a kid they just do that sorta stuff.
hfjakhdsyeah. yeah. like the whole premise was fucked. the casting of m night himself as A Messiah. and the hotel thing like???? its just Such a waste of money?? like any charm the movie might have is like. sucked up by all of that?? like w/out the stupid cameo and the apartment itd be like... Bad but like. not Offensively bad. i wanna kno how he even Pitched the apartment building. who like?? would let someone do that?? unless they got to actually use it after.
not to mention like.. being told that all your life. and already in such a delicate space youd probably start to believe it. which just makes it so much fuckin worse most ~exorcisms~ honestly are shows put on by evangelists to snag up money. and like religion. if you use it With A Brain is like fine ! but peoples brains fall out of their heads sometimes and they use the bible instead.
i just like to feel like im prepared u_u i kno that i like. couldnt be but i just dont want to be snuck up on so im On Edge a decent bit, honestly. even tho like i Do think nothing like that will ever happen to me. it really is like...... fear of smthn thats really unlikely but I Cant Kno For Sure so.
i dnt.. think i consider police shows when i do that?? its all fake anyway n like. im not out there thinkin abt Who here Is A Sociopath im just like. aware that im small and i (foolishly) like to park really far out in the parking lot n i go off alone a lot. n if a dude comes up to me i tend to get like stupid aggressive.
yeah? like horror is only well made if the horror is like... an afterthought.
i just wish the idea of the game was stronger. like if it was just more blunt w whatever it was trying to say bc like.... even if the story was actually depressing the gameplay is still like. fun. i think they just really rely on their antagonists being someone people can like so they dont want them to actually say anything controversial. n yea pacing just. nothing impressive from the story.
tru. industrialization is too pervasive to just be a Thin layer.. its basically everywhere. and j would like............................ not even. really notice the difference. theres still buildings. people still get mad at him when he shoots a gun too close to them. theres just no cops? or he Is the cops. (he would think so anyway.)
hes more aware hes just like....... not being watched. its not as busy. he could, if he wanted, just relax and do nothing and thats like.. totally reasonable & doesnt bother anyone. i dnt think hed ever spend any time in the cave w his friends except when he Has to and he like.. cant explain why. he just feels stifled all over again.
the pirates are even like str8 out called somalian pirates in the handbook like.. their status, at least i think, was meant to be implied w that. esp in how much they hate the island. theyre.... just poor people. to be pushed around by the privateers. vaas definitely sees it. hes audibly pissed abt it he just doesnt put hoyts name in his mouth w it.
yeah??? like keith could just be used for like cleaning. he was just like.. oddly important for just a fetch quest giver. n i think being bucks like Personal Hitman is already like.. important enough. like hes already someone that j would clash with.
citra just needed an honest moment. she needed to have a moment where she told j what her endgame is. and i wish people talked abt her more. like the rakyat. i wish dennis specifically had more to say abt her other than that shes the wife he wants. esp since like.. he really does just. vanish. to just sit in the temple like....... can yall at least attempt to write
yeah? its fun to see movies that are just... really transparent. also films where u can tell the director just didnt kno where to stop. i love...... movies...... that have like 50 things happen in the span of like 2 minutes. AND bad editing. jump cuts are so good 2 me
sp. spawn sounds. like that?? ive never actually heard of it before u. but i Should have? ? ? Immortal Also. im really so so SO lacking in movies honestly.
i purposely rewatch a lot of movies.. i jsut want to see it again?? i generally remember. what movies ive seen... which is . probably mainly bc. i have not seen a lot . ill normally at least remember the title just none of the action. like. the butterfly effect which i have seen Twice but never once has it stuck. aanndd... splice?? all i remember is i liked splice. no idea what happened.
i dnt get that way w fc bc i dnt expect much honestly......... like i kno vaas n j are an Accident. an Outlier. so i nev er expect anything. as personal. fallout tho........................... im still hurt over fo4. and like i DO annoy myself w that bc ill still play it bc like its Fun To Play. but holy SHit it Succckkksss its ssso shallow. ill play it really just to get mad even when im like going in to have fun.
n like it makes sense bc like bethesda keeps slowly taking away. everything. plot And mechanics.
also yeah liking only good things is like.... boring.. idk if its even possible like everyone has smthn im sure.
ive heard a ton of good abt it but ive never been able to watch it.. i Shouldve. when i had amazon prime but i just. didnt. koyaanisqatsi sounds? good? so does tree of life. IDK like.. its not like i Dont like emotion i just dont like when its like..... dramatic. when its like. monologues. which is probably less like.. damning on me than i think and more like. normal.
like im not Against.. slow. scenery. but if Being Upset is all your story has then im like............. not gonna like it...... personally. like when i think emotional i just think. whiny. which is like? reasonable to be annoyed by but its like. not really what most movies/plots are.
i love to plan u_u i dont have anything to do if i dnt have plot points. theres no change for me unless something happens.. and like. i mean i count Emotional Moments too its not just like.... having to physically go somewhere its like.... realizing smthn abt urself like thats smthn that moves the story forward. idk. i rly dnt kno much abt media like. i dont watch many influential movies and i dnt read n i like dnt even really look at art apart from like. the art that pops up on my dash. i dnt even watc h tv. idk. art in any form is weird to me. ive been into it my whole life. its the easiest thing for me to do. but i lik e e . . am not that good at like. comprehending it or speaking on it.
BUT yeah vaas really is like.. the only one that could really actually love j. n yeah i get u like their Relationship isnt pure. theyve both got awful tempers and theyre plagued w violence. but they really are like.. deeply in love w each other. its Those Feelings specifically that are literally pure. no one would listen to vaas like j does and no one would accept j like vaas does.
i like that. that makes her a lot more real. jason would like. never notice her actual role/personality, n shed never want to show it. itd ruin her img to j n hed be turned off to kno its Business. citra doesnt care tho thats not. her problem. if hes not willing to play then shes not willing to bother w him. (also her dying is super. bs.)
theyre so so different.. in Every single way. like you literally cant compare them. i feel like theyre made to like. be incomparable. everything abt them is like The exact opposite.
i use like. fans. for noise too. and like even in winter it gets too quiet for me to be able to keep em off for long so its like.......................... i make it worse on myself and i cant help it.
o i get u it is soothing to watch dirt take in water.. ive never kept on a plant for long tho........ ive bought seeds and everything and never dedicated myself. good Luck on warm air comin thru tho. its getting better here Slowly
yea like those fake rolled out yards i hate. idk you cant just let grass grow as it is around your own house. like that makes no sense. youre gonna pay more to have grass??? grass?? how does that even work?? golf courses are so boring. theyre a lot like parking lots in that way. we’ve got one near here and im glad its like. small. its framed by some beautiful woods too.
i hope he did. id hate for him to keep at it going into 2019. tho his ghost vid was like.. recent wasnt it
i wish they would just get into vlogging. which like. is already not rly healthy. and vloggers will talk abt how just That causes burnout like i can only imagine how people who stream their lives feel.
the corset bit sounds like a cute lil moment.. all of it seems nice. the gifs ive seen of thee.. side missions?? look sweet.. im sure thats not the whole case tho
i feel you on that. like older ones. i can get kinda nostalgic abt but like...... it all just feels sleezy. none of it really makes me feel good. its like fun to look at n like.. thats it. pagan got so screwed w his whole pink thing. he needed some shocking colors but not pink on pink. why not teal and red? kinda like ajay but w a splash of smthn foreign & vibrant. or orange and cream. its pleasing but it doesnt fit in w his army. it puts him at odds w like.. what hes enforcing
he seems snarky which is rly like.. all id need in a character to like em. idek how id react to that in an actual person tho. id probably still like it. i already walk on eggshells around people bc i never wanna get into anything
god yea. i love when people just use astericks to fill in for their sexual comments. like please...... i wouldnt even really care if they made their own posts for it like.. you can say ur blog is nsfw. in the descp. you can put it under a readmore. you can obscure it like...... i dnt need to see it
i just liked the trolls tbh. i liked the horns. they were the whole entire reason i got into it. i dnt think i even read anything unless the trolls were talking. i Do remember being |personally| offended bc i didnt like. the troll that shared my zodiac sign. and liking the.. little caution tape person in the . bunker . n while i dnt think homestuck had an impression on how i typed i do think. bc of people i followed being into it. that i absorbed some of it. like. second hand homestuck influence. i do p much everything the same in actual writing. tho i do capitalize i. and use apostrophes for contractions. i use yall Way less tho. thats not so boring. theres a lot of rules and stuff to learn and exceptions.. its fun to play around w. esp if you can learn it all on your own time. like. not for a grade. you can take it as it is. esp since you are like comfortable in how you write. you dnt have to worry abt Changing/not changing anything
like i remember in school my handwriting. specifically i used to change how i write certain letters whenever i felt like but now i just write a letter however i want....... my writing is usually too sloppy to actually read anyway SO
56 notes.................................... 52 Of Me Rambling
i do read my replies over (when im not like, Tired As Shit) to like fix typos and make sure im getting my point across. but if i made like a first, second, third draft and made these as good as they possibly could be, theyd literally take me weeks. im already so bad at focusing for more than like a minute in the first place. and like i just. dont wanna edit something i say to a friend on my personal blog the way i edit a novel. i dont really wanna like. think about what i say in general. thats such a depressing thing to be insecure about. also like is such a godsend of a word, i have no idea how else to even pace my sentences? digital communication just doesnt compare to the Naturalness of speaking and like, it never will, but the likes and literallys and the technically Wrong punctuation do help making me sound less stiff and awkward imo. ill always prefer to hang out irl and just Talk Normally The Way God Intended if i have the option but when i dont i at least try to like, write in a way thatll hopefully get across how i act irl. yknow. idk how successful that is but. maybe actively trying to modify your behavior in order to seem more Authentic is doomed to begin with, but i dont even know if thats what im doing. anyway the point is need my likes. and, yea theres. a lot of Yeas in general. im pretty sure i start at least half my paragraphs w/ “yea like.”
all i remember about hellsing was that its weird. and very, very japanese. japanese media that deals w/ christian imagery always has like a special vibe to it, even when its not Extremely, Aggressively Gothic. idk if im up for that anymore i feel like thats sth you have to watch in your teens
oh yea berserks pretty long. i keep forgetting how Big that series is. i feel like. berserks one of those things that could be masterful if it was like, six volumes. and it belongs in the 80s imo. i dont want any 2010s berserk stuff. its wrong. i dont remember when exactly i dropped naruto, i think id only just started shippuuden when i grew out of it. i remember hearing about itachi dying in the manga, but thats the most recent news i remember. and yea one piece is still going. appparently were at 932 chapters which is honestly just. absurd. the best writer in the world wouldnt be able to justify something being 932 chapters long. thats like. not okay. i have no idea when i stopped watching one piece, i remember them coming down from skypiea, and i remember uh, the skeleton guy, and zombie animals, but i dont know if i even watched until then in the right order. i have like no sense of the order of events in that series bc theres. no pacing? i refuse to believe that theres people out there that love one piece so much that they dont get frustrated w/ how long everything takes. like i dont think that possible. and im not 100% sure eiichirou oda is having fun anymore either
lmao yea i had this like neon yellow-green tutu that i wore like All the time. tutus are so good? and arm warmers. those were the shit. such a good invention. but its beyond puzzling to me now how i ever had the confidence to wear shit like that, and not just to conventions either.. id put like rhinestones on my cheek and wear this green wig w/ like cybergoth hairpieces sewn to it in just Normal Everyday Life and like. now i can barely carry a neutral handbag when i go outside bc it makes me like. not dysphoric but like. insecure. the most colorful item ill wear now is my bart simpson shirt that has like, some yellow on it. like i respect middle school me for that but also Whew
like, im obviously not gonna go “if you run over an innocent person in gta that translates 1:1 into you condoning murder irl” but its also like undeniably true that people w/ worrisome violent impulses do use video games to vicariously live out things they cant do irl, and that being exposed to violence in that manner has a measurable influence on your brain. gamer dudes are the real anti-antis w/ their “fiction doesnt affect reality” bullshit. “things you frequently expose yourself to will influence you” is literally like saying “water is wet” and its. mind-boggling to me that people will go so far out of their way to vehemently deny it. i Hate how even during the peak of its relevancy, the violence in video games discourse has always been cool young people who are In The Know vs lame stuffy adults who hate fun. even just talking about violence in media was and still is seen as a regressive thing to do. and i hate it! critique, or even just Starting A Conversation, is seen as orwellian, as fascist, as censorship. if you say the media i like has bad aspects, that means youre censoring my right to expression and free speech. thats basically what gamergate was about: when you criticize my favorite corporate products, you invade my safe space and attack my identity. itd be funny how pathetic it is if it wasnt so scary
the sense of “if i stop playing, the ending im not looking forward to wont happen” is stronger for me w/ games than other media, thats for sure. theres sth about games, even really linear ones, that is fuzzy around the edges, and that can be a good thing. revisiting games i only have vague memories of has an uncertainty to it that i dont get w/ movies. nothing close to the effervescence of memories or dreams, but its still different from movies or books in a way thats hard to explain. i watched some gameplay videos of super princess peach recently which i havent played since i was a kid (bc my moms then-boyfriends piece of shit daughter stole my cartridge) and it looked so foreign to me, i didnt recognize anything, until i heard the sound effect of peach breaking a certain type of block. that felt familiar in an almost visceral way. the satisfaction of breaking those blocks w/ your umbrella was like. burned into my memory. ive also noticed that when i watch mario or racing game gameplay that i like, cant type or do anything on my keyboard bc ill feel like ill mess w/ the inputs, like, bc of muscle memory i guess. i still hold my breath when i see people do sth difficult in super mario bros 3. i dont get that w/ series i dont have that kinda muscle memory for. but thats like. the only two things i get w/ playing sth vs watching a lets play that actually make a difference.
i feel like “kinning outside of ability” discourse in general is just. so ripe for Extremely Weird Takes and youd think thered be more of those. like are you allowed to kin someone who cant read? someone who wears glasses but you dont? im surprised w/ how reasonable people have been w/ where to draw the line there, in my experience anyway. considering people on here take the dsm as gospel, youd think thered be more “uhm this character only shows 24% of the symptoms for the disorder your about page says you have so :/” and youd definitely think thered be more “oh so youre kinning someone whos traumatized? im gonna need proof that youve gone thru the exact same thing as them including physical evidence and your medical file. you have until tuesday or ill write a callout post”
and yea thats exactly what this is about for me, escapism. channeling my own problems into something distant from myself, something fictional. when im already in a bad mood i go seek out media thatll probably make me cry, and ill feel better. theres some fanfictions that i keep coming back to but only when i feel like shit, and they like Help, bc i get to morph my negative emotions into sth different. thats my healthiest coping mechanism by a long shot. i cant like explain the intricacies of it bc i dont get it either, but. reading about people thatre like me but better in some way or other, being miserable in ways ive been miserable, it just. helps. when i feel bad the last thing i want is to read about people i relate to being happy. im very like. anti-positivity in general. like i just. find a lot of comfort in a fictional character either sharing my particular brand of pain in their canon, or being able to project it onto them. yknow. like idk what its like for other people and i dont wanna pathologize sth that might actually be Normal but i certainly wouldnt relate to fictional characters this much if i wasnt like. mentally ill
god no i definitely wanna know beforehand who dies. maybe this is on me, maybe i shouldve gone into rdr2 expecting literally everyone whos not in the first game to die. and like i was expecting Depressing, but i wasnt expecting... the feeling of the world literally ending? If I May Ramble About Western Movies For A Bit Here, theres this strong underpinning of melancholy inherent to the genre/time period, and rdr2 (and neo-western in general) acknowledges that so clearly, like.. that whole theme of the “untamed” west growing smaller and civilization/law and order/technology taking over, and the century coming to a close. the natives that havent been eradicated being displaced again and again until theres nowhere left to run. wild animals becoming rarer. the way npcs talk about the war. knowing theyre closer to ww1 than the civil war now; i get that w/ period pieces in general, even when theyre really light in tone. knowing whats ahead. theres this nikola tesla frankenstein type npc who has you help w/ his electricity experiments and im just................. the whole atmosphere of the game is very like, pre-apocalyptic to me. the way Current Year is. the way the world has been since the invention of agriculture, but especially since the industrial revolution. and everyone in western media knows it, too. arthur says “civilization” like its a curseword. urbanization is depicted as unambiguously evil. thats intrinsic to all western stories, and to the way america fetishizes liberty. liberty and civilization are opposites, and no matter how right-wing you are or how conservative you think your message is, if you write a western, itll reflect the fact that the law is oppressive, like it or not. and that atmosphere, paired w/ everybody and their mother dying either at the hands of said law, or being driven to kill each other because of it, or from disease due to the shitty living conditions that civilization brings w/ it, is just... sad. its a kind of melancholy no other genre can offer. the melancholy of freedom dying, fast enough to observe. idk if killing off pretty much all the characters on top of that was really necessary lmao. but like, ill take it. not like i dont like misery. its just.... a Lot to take in
i wanna say i know how soccer works bc its like the only sport over here and we played it every fucking gym class. but the truth is i know how soccer works bc of an inazuma eleven nintendo ds game. i need to like, get into a piece of media about it in order to learn about sth. 100% of the time. i literally dont remember the last time i learned sth that wasnt for fandom reasons. i need like. a well-made and exceedingly homoerotic tv show about football if i ever wanna learn the rules and i doubt thats going to happen so like. ive given up on that one
i still like lets plays w/ mediocre commentary better than silent ones though. those are so awkward. when the player makes like a mistake, even just a tiny one, or pulls off sth difficult, i need a human voice to acknowledge that. like a sigh will do. i just need someone to like Be There. and i dont even know if i found the lets players i watch today, if id like them at all? im pretty sure i wouldnt like theradbrad if i wasnt so used to his voice by now. hes almost as old as my mom and he doesnt know what a tapir is. hes honestly pretty like. dumb and annoying. but i like him bc i know him so well, and thats enough.
i literally had like an “oh fuck thats right its 2019 and we dont get our gaming news from magazines anymore we harrass game devs on twitter now” moment just now. like man, im. im not even that old but. i literally dont know how the industry (or even just the consumer end of it) works nowadays like at all. i really just get all my media-related news from tumblr and youtube, almost completly passively. im only somewhat caught up on fcnd bc i keep seeing it on blogs i look at for gifsets to reblog (not even on my dash, bc i dont actually. want these people around) but i dont actually like, look at any sorta games journalism websites or twitter. im still like an extremely online person but i feel like such a grandpa?
i play legos w/ my 8y/o cousins a lot, though the fun for them is in the actual Playing, like w/ character interaction, while i just want to build shit. i honestly dont even know how to like play anymore, like i know i played w/ other kids w/ barbies a lot and i know we focused like 100% on character interaction and talking but i really dont know what we like did? so i just. extend my lil house on stilts that i made and occasionally break up fights (and/or try to analyze whats wrong w/ my cousins and then talk to their mom about it bc like they.. bring up burglars in their play a lot and i legit have no idea why)
idk maybe they actually like sold the apartment complex? they mustve right? just like how they planted and sold all that corn for interstellar, except that was.. just corn..... honestly the more i learn about shyamalan the more im starting to feel like hes not real. like hes a practical joke, a long con by a performance artist that got out of hand. but i feel that way about a lot of men in hollywood. but the worst part is how people still believe in him? peoples standards for him are so low, too, like ive heard people say the visit of all fucking things is his return to form? like theres many bad directors out there but shyamalan really like. gets to me bc people fucking love him for NO reason like his whole career is upsetting to me
i dont think.. theres a way to raise your child christian and not be abusive. no offense lmao. but threatening a child w/ hell and damnation is inherently abusive. any religion that leaves no room for forgiveness and growth is evil, period. if you raise your child to be afraid, you are evil. religion is supposed to be the most natural thing in the world. imo religion is what makes a creature sapient much moreso than language or the use of tools does. faith is inherent to all living beings, faith precedes culture, its what connects us to the earth and the universe, and to understand it and harness it into a form of Religion as we understand it today is the mark of a creature being sapient. theres no intelligence without belief. and then theres christianity which is literally just an instrument of conquest and subjugation. like i know this sounds harsh lmao. but i have no sympathy for christians left anymore. maybe its bc its bc my parents are atheists and all i know about christianity comes from an outside perspective. but i dont think theres spiritual joy to be found in a belief system that hinges on authority as much as the church does. i dont think thats possible. i dont think theres an ounce of light in christianity.
im not a very fearful person. i get anxious about dumb shit, and i definitely still avoid like, phone calls, and i never ask for help or see doctors or anything. but im not really like. afraid. im confrontational and impulsive and i dont think ive ever panicked, which has its up- and its downsides. chances are if i ever encounter an honest to god serial killer ill either try and flirt w/ them or go full “oh yea? well kill me then you pussy.” yknow, like a smart person would. maybe thats what my response to Fear is and i just havent been able to identify the feeling right, i dont know. i just know thats how i tend to talk to people who act like they have authority over me, be it cops or teachers or just. men in general. and who knows, maybe thatll literally get me killed one day :'-) im at least like 80% sure that when i die its gonna be at the hands of a man i shouldntve angered
the thing is, copaganda has undermined society to a degree thats like. unimaginable. the world as such literally isnt dangerous. a good 99% of people are either well-intentioned or theyre cowards, frequently both. you can live for a thousand years and never get into a situation where the police/justice system would actually be helpful. but they want you to believe that serial killers and/or """""""psycho-/sociopaths"""""" (which i literally consider a slur at this point honest to god i have no patience left for psychiatric language at all) are incredibly common, and that you need the police to protect you from them. and being afraid of random strangers and happenstance helps nobody except the police and the state. like yea i do feel safer when i carry a knife when i walk by the train station at night, but im also pretty sure ill never need it. yea i do spend my life expecting everyone to be out to harm me, but i also like. dont fear that. if that makes sense: i dont trust anyone, but i behave as if i do. i take chances, stupid ones at that. ill talk to a guy about columbine and red rooms and how id get rid of a body and go home with him anyway. but im still breathing so!
its been proven time and time again that villains that you can actually be scared of arent fun. dudebros dont like kylo ren one bit, bc hes not badass. bc hes exactly the type of guy whos scary in real life. hes pathetic and he feels hes been wronged: hes like elliot rodger. you dont wanna identify w/ that. hes not cool at all, and thats exactly why hes a good villain. (dont get me wrong i hate star wars than i could possibly put into words and i especially hate adam drivers stupid face. but i 100% support uncool realistic villains.) and games in particular just stand and fall w/ the characters for me. we literally just needed good villains. thatd be more than half the work already done. just... hire a good actor..... please you dont even have to write anything. just hire an interesting person again
yea he. doesnt understand what cops even like are. what they do. why hes felt so unfree. and yea, i dont think hes spoiled in the way that hes like.. uh... remember the simple life w/ paris hilton? hes not that kind of spoiled. the biggest privilege he has is ignorance. but hes also like, fine w/ sleeping on a cot or eating plain rice though. hes definitely the open-minded kind of stupid. thats important to me. pls yall just. keep that in mind. i have to deal w/ so much mischaracterization. at least like, concede to me that hes open-minded. he doesnt even think twice about the fact that hes in a third-world country w/ a completely different culture than the us. the people speak english, he barely even notices their accent, and theres still like, cars, and money, and roads, and food in plastic packaging, and radios, and electric lights. hes been to poor countries and w/ widespread corruption before and he didnt understand the authorities there any better than he does the ones back home. the world is just the world and thats that. and yea, i can see him thinking hes like, helping people by restoring order. idk if hed connect that to the word Police but he might very well believe his own hype to some degree. not that hes like, a godsend to the rakyat, but that hes on the right path and deserves some measure of gratitude.
yea he very clearly doesnt like being around his friends lmao. like, hes not growing distant from them bc hes changed so much. theres no gradual change in their relationship, no conflict. he just doesnt like them. if i was supposed to get the impression that he likes spending time w/ his friends, and that he cares about them, @ubisoft? yallve failed. and while i dont think the cave being a Cave like, means anything, its really just a practical place to hide, theres sth to be said about the confinement of the cave vs the literal fenced-off prison vaas lives in vs the open sky of the beach and the sea vs the canopy of leaves in the jungle. (bachelard voice) spaces like..... mean something, man
yea i mean. they did kinda only make like two kinds of pirates and then copy-pasted them, and theres not supposed to be a lot of like. individuality happening. theyre kinda just. racially and culturally ambiguous, faceless cannon fodder. thats a real far cry staple aint it, writing a war story but somehow trying to avoid politics in it. theyll admit that the pirates are unhappy w/ what they are, but acknowledging the circumstances that led them here, thats too Political. gotta draw the line somewhere.
id really like to know what vaas’ relationship w/ hoyt is like. like in Detail. hes nervous around hoyt alright, but hes always nervous. i keep thinking about his delivery on that one line, “why boss, are you planning a parade,” its just so...... *gestures vaguely* yknow? i just wanna know how vaas feels about like. everything
j clashes w/ Everyone. the last thing he needs is extra motivation to kill some random guy whos like, slightly annoying him. i mean, buck doesnt like, stick out or anything, he fits right in w/ the rest. hes not worse written than, say, citra, or earnhardt, or sam. theres just. not a lot of great characters in this game. i do think buck had potential though. i like the performance. hes memorable, hes charismatic, kinda intimidating, hed be so fun if he just... yknow............... i dont know why that was necessary. i really dont. im not even sure the ubisoft employee specifically responsible for the whole keith Mess could give me an answer, much less a satisfying one. bc there just. isnt a narrative justification. there cannot be. like yall had a good thing going there why.. why that
im supposed to like get the impression that citra manipulated dennis, right. like im supposed to feel like hes under her influence and.. presumably, ideally, i should. worry about him? i should have like a bad feeling about citra, but not completely see thru her, and be concerned w/ her influence on my mentor, who has helped me, and who i owe, and care about. right? just let me like, care about dennis... i want to. and i want to like, slowly uncover what citra is up to. pwease
spawn is so fucking good. not just the movie either. everything about it, and about the character. im pretty sure i initially just watched the movie bc i was like Oh a morally gray superhero w/ burn scars 👀👀? but its legitimately SO fun. the whole Style of it. the outdated cgi. the unabashed 90sness. how gross it is. i like my superhero stories r-rated and weird, and also 90s comic books w/ black protagonists are just. literally always good? i cant think of a bad one? god i love spawn
i only know about immortal bc it happened to be on tv at like three in the morning one time. i really dont know a lot about pop culture at all, i just. know about the very specific and niche things that i like. and one of my niches is a very specific style of twenty-year-old movies thatre a solid five on imdb, thatre very dated, and have a like, certain yet indescribable atmosphere to them. theres another movie in that category about like, a fallen angel w/ like, tribal tattoos whos trying to save a girl i think? and the whole thing was like the 300 levels of stylized, but i cant for the life of me remember the title. i think about some of the imagery from it all the time, i wish i knew what its called bc i Really wanna rewatch it. theres so many good movies from the 90s/00s that most people would say aged like milk, but i really like the 90s/y2k cool. i like leather trench coats and tramp stamps and frosted tips and seashell necklaces and blond hair w/ black highlights, bc thats what i saw on tv as a kid and thought was cool then. and i havent grown out of it. the max payne movie still rules 100% unironically. its not even just nostalgia (imo anyway), its just. legitimately still cool to me.
i only remember the creature design from splice, bc i thought she was cute. and a like... weirdly tender scene between her and the guy? wasnt there some really weird like romance thingy going on w/ that movie?
consciously im 100% aware that ubisoft didnt write vaas n j. and that theyre a bad company that makes bad games with bad writing. but emotionally im...... u_u im not very like Rational about fc. idk why im so patient w/ shitty media... i mean, im still watching wwe at this point so like. lmao. like yea im absolutely miserable watching it and i complain about it nonstop and i really, genuinely hate it, but....... one or two good things happened that one time, like three years ago. so maybe................... yknow. im smart about my media consumption like that!
koyaanisqatsi is so good? its like a 90 minute music video, but like. a good one. i like media thats like, just.... footage of like, a monkey using a stick as a tool juxtaposed w/ humans working in a factory or sth. ants in a colony juxtaposed w/ people crossing the street in akihabara. just like, stock footage of nature. i like art thats just like We Live In A Society in that way. its not the deepest thing ever but its well-composed and well-paced and its just. good. its really good. its an Experience. yknow. its more about what you Think about while watching it, what the imagery reminds you of, than the imagery itself. like the images are just, almost random, theyre literally stock footage, but. its like, a jumping off point. i liked powaqqatsi a fair bit too bc its basically more of the same, but naqoyqatsi is just a complete waste of time. no offense godfrey. but. urgh.
i love monologues. i love how in (newer) terrence malick movies you never know on a literal level who everyones talking to, or why. i love movies thatre just, an aging poets home videos w/ them talking over the whole thing. voiceover narration in conventional/“popcorn” movies kills me w/ how cringy it is but in anything artsy, it can be used so well and i dont like the bad rep it gets. im not usually one for melodrama but terrence malick is just......... he just gets it. i legitimately think hes a genius. and yes ive seen song to song but its still a hill im willling to die on
misery is definitely sth a story has to earn, but my standards for what that entails are pretty low. i dont think ive ever looked at a piece of media and thought, thisd be better if it was more light-hearted, only the opposite. i mean, i love lars von triers antichrist, and thats just pure misery from the opening scene on. its just two people being horrible to each other and to themselves for 110 minutes, and i think its amazing. its not good and lars von trier is not a smart man but. god i love that movie
i dont want anything to change, i dont want my characters to grow. what i write about is two ex-marines in their late 50s settling into a domestic routine in the middle of a war zone and never talking to each other. (yea i really only write about two characters. i have tags for like a dozen or so but i only write about two. im. very organized.) and i could 100% draw that out to to like 900 pages. i probably will. i really do like media where nothing happens. i like songs that are an hour long and have no melody. im like. so far removed from the average tumblr writer lmao
i feel like im pretty good at like understanding what art means to me and what i dis/like about it, but its so hard to communicate. probably impossible, tbh. i dont believe in sharing experiences. i cant make other people see how i feel about art just like i cant share w/ them my dreams. yknow.
when gilles deleuze said, “your secret can always be seen on your face and in your eyes. lose your face: become capable of loving without remembering, without phantasm and without interpretation, without taking stock. let there just be fluxes, which sometimes dry up, freeze or overflow, which sometimes combine or diverge. a man and a woman are fluxes. all the becomings which there are in making love, all the sexes, the n sexes in a single one, or in two, which have nothing to do with castration. on lines of flight there can no longer be but one thing, life-experimentation. one never knows in advance, since one no longer has either future or past. see me as i am: all that stuff is over. […]” ...... like i know he wrote that a good 35 years before fc3 came out but.. he knew
god i just wish citra had been treated w/ any kind of like, attention or care... like, j cant be like, torn between two groups/ideologies like ajay is, thats not what his story is about. i dont want citra to be like on the same level as vaas in terms of her influence on j or anything. i just want her to have her own thing going on. for her to not be defined by her relationship to a white man. thats 100% doable. maybe not for this team of writers but. like, in theory.
theyre not even opposites in like, a yin-yang type way, theyre just. two unrelated people from different walks of life who wouldnt even know each other if they didnt happen to grow up together. from what ive seen the people who are most intent on comparing them are fanfic writers who — im just gonna go out on a limb here — are probably straight women who know nothing about bisexuality. bc it always comes down to how j finds both of them attractive bc theyre apparently so similar. its never about ideas or politics or just. anything other than sexual attraction. its so lame. no one takes citra seriously. not the writers, not the fans. and i do blame the fans for that; when youre presented w/ a badly written female character youre supposed to put in the work yourself to make them better. you cant just go “well thats what shes like/how shes framed in canon so thats how im gonna write her” when the canon is so like.. bad
yea the like whirring of a fan is such a comfy background noise to doze off to. i dont really like the feeling of waking up and realizing the fans been on for like six hours bc that feels so wasteful but i like the whole like, Atmosphere that comes with sleeping in intervals, w/ sleeping thru the worst of the heat and then staying up all night. i just. miss summer So Much
i usually replace plants when they wilt bc im. impatient. its very rewarding to see a plant come back from the dead ofc but :-( i just want Alive Shit to surround me at all times. im very much looking forward to “buy another narcissus every two weeks bc they grow way long and ugly and the leaves keep like. flopping over” season
it like makes me so angry when rich people have boring ugly houses and yards? like you got all this money and you choose to spend it on a barren white house made of glass in a bland field of grass somewhere? like you can afford to surround your house w/ a massive greenhouse and fill it all the way up w/ tropical plants and butterflies n shit and instead you just? choose to live in hell? what is wrong w/ you. why. i think the worst rich people house ive ever seen is the dobre brothers’. its just a box made of glass w/ nothing in it w/ a lawn around it. it has all the charm of an abandoned walmart. it. makes me so sad to think about? that people live like that, because they choose to?
i like the vlog format generally but id Never Ever want more than like, two or three vlogs per month from someone. like if you genuinely like and care about a content creator why the fuck would you take joy in seeing them bend over backwards every single day of their life in order to entertain you. like how does that not make you sad to see. how is that fun for you. daily vlogs are the worst, and even weekly vlogs shouldnt be a thing. if you happen to go on a trip or to an event or sth and you want to vlog it or take pictures of it, by all means. and tbh id definitely be a vlogger if i was rich, but daily vlogging would have me burned out in under a week. even when you do have a fun/interesting lifestyle that you might even be able to wring enough content from. thats just. miserable. commodifying your private life. i also dont think i could handle the stress of like. dealing w/ youtube admins/trying to monetize everything i make/doing brand deals/making merch and plugging it every two minutes. id never want to have to rely on youtube/social media for money. id never want to take vlogging seriously. social media is just. so bad for people
theres a lot of incredibly sweet moments in rdr2.. the character are so Good. and a lot of npcs have completely pure intentions. youre so used to everyone wanting to rob/kill/scam you that you might be reluctant to help people just out of the goodness of your heart, but youll start to feel like an asshole for that when you realize that most npcs genuinely just need help. you might go into every side mission like “lol i got a bad feeling about this guy” but most of the time, nothing happens. because most people are good, even if theyre a little weird. the world of rdr is fundamentally a friendly one. its just the police and the rich people thatre making it bad. but the little man, the normal villagers, theyre good people, even if they cant always act like it. thats why arthur is such a good main character for this story. hes a good person in a bad situation. i feel like, under all that shitty wannabe satire and all the making fun of “stupid” people, rockstar games always have a heart. yknow
yea like pagan just. doesnt fit into his surroundings, visually. i do like the color palette of fc4 w/ all the deep reds and the oranges and the light blues and whites and silvers. theres some really good visuals in that game. and, i wouldve been fine w/ the all pink if it was just one outfit of many. and if it had a meaning. colors like. mean things. youre in a landscape thats almost entirely made of various grays, snow white, and desaturated blues. and the reds and oranges and pinks form a stark contrast to that. so you got sth to work with there. fc4 couldve really set itself apart from other games of its kind thru unique presentation. pagan couldve worn like.. gray and blue when you first meet him, symbolizing hostility and impenetrability, maybe w/ like an orange accent to curb the totality of that. you could do a lot w/ lighting there too. his face being in shadow, backlit by the sun. and the better you get to know him, the warmer the colors he wears. and the opposite happens for amita and sabal. yknow. start out subtle, to where you wont even pay attention to the colors until its already too late to heed the warning they entailed. you could do that w/ literally every character. noore has the warmest, most vibrant color scheme, and shes a tragic figure, so what do we make of that? what does her design communicate? and what about yumas hair? can bhadras green vest just symbolize hope please? thats like color symbolism 101. youre working w/ a visual medium here @ubisoft, take advantage of that for fucks sake
hes sarcastic alright but like. in such a nice way. the quippy wisecracker is probably my least favorite character trope, thank god rockstar employs adult writers for once, im literally so glad game devs that care about character writing like.. exist. and, yea a characters memorable one-liners are overrepresented in gifsets compared to the actual text obviously and like, i just wanna make it clear that arthur is never like, mean. hes incredibly likable. i wanna say id love to have him as a friend but im. tragically bad at being friends w/ people who i see as potential sexual partners u_u i love him, but. im not sure in what way
like, i also hate the puritanical attitude tumblr has adopted where every vague allusion to sexuality is denounced as “freak shit”.... we should just retire the term freak at this point. like i really hate how fully grown adults are expected to keep it “i want to hold hands w/ a cute girl uwu,” but like. theres. a balance. theres a pretty clear balance between oppressive puritanism and being disgustingly open about your sexuality to the point where you like, involve unwilling strangers in your kink. a balance thats extremely easy to strike for most people, yknow, outside of tumblr
i like the trolls’ design. like, for drawing. i still draw porrim and megida every once in a while, they just have nice Shapes, like in their horns n hair. and!! the caution tape person yes! aimless renegade! and wayward vagabond too, god those were so good. i think my favorite homestuck character is still bro though..... not dirk i kinda hate dirk. Only Bro.
i really dont remember what learning basic spelling was like for me. i feel like ive just always been good at it. for both german n english somehow. i dont remember having to like, learn it. (well, i dont know any like, current day orthography rules for german bc weve had like a billion reforms over the last 150 years and i learned to read using old books, and i vehemently refuse to learn bc i think the new rules are offensively ugly. but i mean like, in general.) ive like legitimately never studied anything..? ive done a lot of Stressing over my handwriting though. i do still wish my handwriting was more like, old-timey, but i dont worry about it like i used to. i wish english had like, a version of sütterlin, which i could be really good at if i ever practiced but i just never write anything in german, so. i love sütterlin bc no one under like 80 can read it anymore, and im just, pretentious i guess. i just like old shit. and god did i used to worry about that, like. ive arrived at a point now where i write in like, a really lazy mix of kurrent and block letters, and im fine w/ that, but i do still get really frustrated w/ my lettering. i bought a bunch of brush pens mostly for drawing but i still like, feel like handlettering is something im supposed to be good at. i never like. practice though, i just. worry about it lmao
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