#ive gotten tired of it now lol

[imflyingfish]

save me dungeon meshi... save me... save me dungeon meshi

#man ive been so tired today #i had a more full on day than usual so im actually taking this evening a bit easier than usual #....which i now feel bad about lol #anyway #guess wht show has gotten me through it #i don

[mrpsychokiller]

im gonna be real with you guys, im not leaving tumblr. i made accounts in other places but i dont think i can leave this place, not after 6 years here and not after gaining a big following being the only thing that lets me get enough money from commissions to get by lol. i'll always be on discord to talk to my friends but otherwise either this site dies or i do. whatever happens first

#🧃 #im just too tired #too tired to make a million accounts too tired to crosspost too tired to start again #im attached to this place and all the people and the memories ive gotten here #but im also just scared of having to start again and whats gonna be of me if i dont have enough people to share my ko-fi around lol. #as if things arent already so unstable and scary for me now

[todayisafridaynight]

tumblr keeps showing me Actual Genuine Coochie on my damn dashboard so they better not burst a blood vessel the second i start posting dicks

#nsff #snap chats #i would never. not on this christian site. #BUT SERIOUSLY STOOOPPPPPP MY BROTHER USES THIS SITE I DONT WANT HIM LOOKIN AT THAAAT #HE ONLY USES IT ON MOBILE SO HES PROB FINE BUT STILL ENOUGH #I DONT CARE BOUT YOUR GAPING HOLE SAMANTHA IM TRYNA SCROLL #anyawy. ive gotten nothing done today ive just been running errands with my brother :') #mineda| week being This Week was the worst thing ever im too tired and busy to sit down and draw #AND NOW I WANNA FINISH THIS FIC FIRST RAAAGHHHG everything is awful #i'll just shotgun all the prompts on saturday for stream LOL #ok let me try t get SOMETHING done before my eldest sister gets here. my other sister alredy here #did i . clarify how i distinguish between my sisters yet cause it could get confusing sometimes #my Eldest sister is My Eldest Sister and my Older Sister is my sister who is older but not the eldest. hope that helps <3 #im p sure there's specific terms in tagalog to differentiate but i forgor. any pinoy followers know what i mean or am i insane #w/e. bye now

[suculentt]

i appreciate having a better family doctor now. really, i do. it's a relief to be listened to and taken seriously.

but she has (indirectly, through specialist referrals) given me five chronic illness diagnoses in the last three months. f i v e. like, okay, that's good, it's ENOUGH SLICES!

#call me pokemon because apparently i gotta collect em all #sigh. im so tired #also i love how ive gotten all of these diagnoses but no treatment. all the doctors say sorry no can do #anyways. ignore me lol. just yelling into the void #i think i have eight diagnoses now for my physical health (i dont think my longterm muscular injuries count? but i have three of those lmao) #chronic illness #chronic pain #chronically ill #neuropathy #diabetes #arthritis

[tboyautism]

the idea of forearm crutches is. so nice. i feel relief just thinking about them.

#i have no idea how to fo about mobility aids #for context: im unmedicated right now. conpletley. #after an mri didnt find any swelling they took me off my meds cause my arthritis seemed like it wasnt active #granted now everything hurts more and is somehwta swollen #pain clinic in several months and im suspected for having fibro or another pain amplification disorder #but god #my hips and knees are so bad walking has become so painful #stairs jesus christ #i have to go up them every day for school and i dread ir #my physical therapist also thinks im ready to graduate from physical therapy #because of how strong ive gotten #and the initail reasoning for me to not get a cane or anything was because we were focusing on strengthening my body #but everything still hurts. lol. #the idea of being able to put my weight on something other than my knees sounds so nice #im so tired #ugh #fibro #arthritis #disabled #tagging this because i kind of need advice

[skenpiel]

u know the thing about raves is i like. fall in love with every other person i see. there was a fucking gorgeous goth girl right next to me doing that slow goth dance style while everyone else was going wild i was like Mesmerized. also sorry this makes me feel like a creep but theres just so many hot people i kept being like O__O

#we raved then we went to a different rave that was like. les dubstep n edm n shit and more just dance music #like it was just like a dance party #we stayed there for hours i danced until my damn nose and feet were bleeding (literally) #AWESOME !!!! so tired now i dont think ive gotten that much exercise lkke ever lol

[quixotic-gray]

so when i had a disaster to clean up i went and made it 100x worse so i could clean everything more deeply-- basically all i would have needed to do was replace the book shelf and theres a significantly more mentally ill me that wouldn't even have done that much so I'm a little proud. we're alright 👌 tho probably nothing wouldve gotten done if i had to work more than one day since all this shit. and getting the trombone-- that makes me wanna get this place all cozy and nice so it'll be even more fun to learn and appreciate time spent with it.

but its been so much damn work these past few days and I am just so damn burnt out and exhausted now bc I've not done much other than try to make my space livable-- i havent been able to even set my computer up so now that I can walk around a bit without dying I think i deserve to play vampire survivors. and I'm fucking going to. even tho i feel so much guilt seeing the total playtime add up like theres so much useful shit i coulda been doing instead theres hundreds of hours logged into a goddamn game. really have to work harder on this recreation-guilt thing huh

#my brain is dead right now legit #vs is such a recharge for me i just love it so much #they recently came out with a new update and i havent gotten to play the astral stair yet and ive been thinking about it #but you bet your mothers ass im gonna be playing that shit now #i would be playing the trombone now but im physically exhausted too and im not used to holding it to play yet #i remember when my arms got tired playing the trumpet too lol feels so teeny now #my mouth gets even more tired than my fuckin arms tho like damn- the trombone mouthpiece is a lot bigger than the trumpet #so instead of just training my face fresh on a trombone mouthpiece i gotta relearn it #so the past couple days ive been clearing a space to play for a bit then i fuck around until my mouth feels like soggy bread pfft #it gets better each time i pick it up tho which has been fulfilling to see this progress #from percy with love

[the-kipsabian]

important update

i finally have chapter 3 of immortal fears moving

#solved the issue i had with it and now we are moving #we'll see how far i get tonight im very tired tbh #but its been half an hour and ive gotten together as many new words as there already was with two rewrites of the opening lol #so its going now! i dont know how much time i have for writing this week tho unfortunately so it probably wont be finished before next week #BUT ITS FINALLY GOING!! #im just very happy to be writing again thats all <3 #night is an absolute mess on main

[alphalesbian]

.

#................................................................................................................................. #so another update on my skin i guess . . . #about a week in and its basically everywhere on my chest and terribly on my back and legs and butt : - ( worst its gotten so far is itchy as #all hell on my side but thankfully so far thats really it....... ive maybe been tired n had a sore ish throat like when i first felt it but #not really anymore.... now its just my skin looking. awful lol everywhere #but....... i found out about this skin thing that looks Exactly The Same As Mine Looks Right Now and that ! was a major relief considering ! #its not a serious skin thing and my symptoms almost entirely align with the process so far ! ! ! #as much as i am still skeptical im just. i dont know that helped a lot i guess. everything else id found n been thinking it could be were #oretty serious things for the most part which honestly raqcking my brain about that for the past week uh #probably wasnt the best mental health decision to make OTL............... #still gonna go up the mountain for some cheap blood work tommorow..... then back to urgent care on wed/thurs to really make sure its nothing #serious which will also immediately improve my headspace regardless so. thats good too #and the help from my best friend . . . . . . . . . i am so so lucky to have him he is literally so special. i was right at the bottom and he #didnt even hesistate . crazy how that can feel so nice and hurt so much at the same time #hurt really from just honestly how immensely empty i was and how much i really needed that support #still though absolutely heated from. the initial situation and how my main support just kinda fucked off in response lmao! but #all that greif and sadness and ugly crying aside today has been a mostly good day in comparison. let alone finding out something it could #absolutely very well be and its Not Super Serious Necessarily and Pretty Common all things considered #is a big plus. . . . a lot to think about and a lot to do as always just really really gotta keep my head on my shoulders . . . . . . . . . #okay and honestly all that aside ladies it looks. so crazy. i really actually maybe am gonna take pictures of this to really document it nd #even if its a serious thing its like. so crazy looking #feels pretty ridiculous dont get me wrong it literally feels like my skin is fucked up where its raised n swollen but the pattern is #idk medically fascinating to me i guess is the best way to say it lol #how would that be for my first selfie in like 4 years teehee 😌 anyways enough of my ranting but in case anyones interested here ya go . . .

[thebuttsmcgee]

so. um. 👉👈

hi guysies.

Ig I should just say like. Hi

I haven't been posting here as much cause. Idk. Might be depression? I keep thinking its cause I've been so busy, which also wouldn't be not untrue, but these past, like, 3 weeks I think so far? I've had some free time but I haven't cause. I dunno, then again, I haven't been doing too much in general? I gues, besides very mandatory things, hell I've even been lacking in my regular skyrim hours of playing.

That, and as said, I get super melancholic when I remember just how sad and bittersweet it is that t0h is. Actually legit over. The show and experience, that is.

Oh all that and also becuz my headphones broke! Fuck! That's like number 2 in my bare necessities for when I post, do almost anything really! It's seriously been painful this past month going without headphones holy shit. Dude I've been scratching at the bit for some relief for headphones, I NEED music legitimately. Even right now, as I'm typing this on my phone, my music is on low levels.

But yerp. Its been. Rough. Really rough. I really do appreciate yall, everyone of yall. Have a sweet week everyone, ✌️!

#the butts chronicles #ogh but yea. been rough. #as said I have no idea if we'll keep this house cause man shits been fucked #uhhhh. lets see. recently my sister got into a fairly nasty argument with her husband since they were both drunk and hes a bit of a. hm #quick to being mad guy? I spose? but yea they made up and he actually apologized to me and my family for that so. its okay? #OH YEA FUCK LOL a few weeks ago fuckin tecksas got hit nasty with a hurricane and GUYS. I FREAKED OUT SO BAD LOL #cuz there was hail with the rain but since. I dont think we even ever experienced hail here I was scared that my ceiling roof broke again #and that it was the rain leaking to my room ceiling and was about to burst my ceiling so I legit started hyperventilating and panicking #with like. short and heavy breathing and almost crying badly until I went to look outside and saw hail and only slightly calmed down #oh but yea it was nasty lol. then the next day almost the entire block lost power and apparently sparks were happening cause fallen trees #uhhh. lets see. hmmm. OH OH RIGHT DAMN I FORGOT WE GOT A PUPPY LOL #we've gotten a lil pup all the way back from dec? iirc and she is now older and a shit lol shes in her teething phase and whatnot #still p cute tho and very puppyish. oh yea also during dec our power went out and ogh man dec was so freezing literally. #almost as bad as the one from. uhhh I cant remember the exact year but I remember it being within these past 4 years at least cause I read #a t0h fic during it lol. oh yea speaking of. we also changed our light company and damn. its been not bad so far! we had to pay up to 300 #in our old company and now we dont even get to 200 so far! hope Im not jinxing it! hmm oh did I already say before that I had to get a new #phone? cause I did and I did not enjoy it lol. had it for a while and now and its arguably worse cause no damn headphone plug-in #I think I did mention this but in case. I did finish counseling. well more accurately they required payments again since things and whatnot. #I think? I mentioned the stuff I got for my bday and chmisas. I got mostly neat stuff. I guess. one of them has still yet to arrive lol #uhhhh. hrm. I did get Mr. Martinet's autograph as a present! hrmmm #my other sister got another surgery a while back and its been relatively the same since. hmm. my only other living grandparent passed away #me and my ex got into a. not great argument cause mistakes and whatnot. raccoons in the attic thats hopefully taken care of for now #aaaaand the plushes I ordered a damn near year ago have been technically canceled cause of unfortunate circumstances for the creator #who just kinda. posts things now lol ig. #but yea. lots. holy shit guys. lots has happened. fuck man. I think Ive been way more tired than I thought. #not to mention the past weeks of just. reflecting. man #uhhh #long post #LOL i gues #but yerp.

[coridallasmultipass]

.

#back to being depressed rn mN i feel like my health was bad back im 2019 but like #i still had hope about me #i feel like ive lost all of it and im so tired of everything #i cant even read that fic im just so depressed and tired and i dont want to keep being so hopeless and miserable #im not living rn im just existing and even that is too much when i know im not gonna get anywhwre in life #my chronic illnesses and pain have been kicking my ass the past 5 years and i miss feeling human and alive evem if it hurt #now im justl like a ghost or something performing humanity very poorly #i got like no friends and can barely take care of myself #my life has only ever gotten worse by the year since age 11 #like i saw a post earlier about how 'it gets better after ur done with teens and college age' but ive only declined my whole life #i feel like ive never even lived #im just tired #vent #delete later / / #am i even real like lol i feel like i dont exist honestly its just a dream or something #i shouldnt have attempted my therapy homework i know im bottling things and its spilling over but #it doesnt help to talk about the thing that happened it just makes it worse #fuck ok i need to try and just sleep before i really breakdown #depression #sorry idk what to tag i need to go

[ratvich]

im normal and not affected by things from the past im normal and not affected by things from the past im normal and not affected by things from the past im nor

#vent #lol. #haha good thing im normal and not affected by things from the past ! so ill be able to act really normal after being reminded about x thing #i wish all of that never happened so id never associate it with lockdown / That Time #i wish i had actually killed myself. lol #really tired of instantly getting upset or sad or crying whenever something reminds me of that time #ive gotten slightly better about like one thing but it still makes me sad sometimes i dont want to think about that anymorw #i know rhis is mean to say and i probably dont really mean it and im just saying it cause im upset right now but #i hope he gets sad about it too #not fair

[cl0wn-l4k3]

got so scared by the crinkly sound the plastic bag of popcorn that I WAS CLOSING made that my ears started ringing through my headphones wowie

#also idk maybe im like. stressed bcus my week has been shit lol??? #in the past two days: #my cat has gotten sick and we dont know whats wrong with him #my great aunt died #and now my dads dogs just killed his cat #plus some other personal family stuff i dont wanna get into #and ive been feeling angels watching me and hiding in my dreams again so yknow. hopefully i dont end up hospitalized #bcus i know the angels will only come closer and things will only get worse #idk. it doesnt matter. im not ready to become god yet so i have to stay #im tired. i want to let my brain drift away without this body for good #i cant fly anymore. i dont remember the last time i had tried #i cant feel in between the air anymore #its all going going going #sorry sorry sorry. why am i always sorry #idk idk idk. i think im gone

[arolesbianism]

Man I've gotta be mean more often Im so sick of being polite abt bigotry I should just start killing ppl fr

#rat rambles #Im tired of babysitting ignorant ppl Im tired of trying to be nice abt shit someone needs to give me a gun #Im tired of trying to be presentable towards ppl who are on the fense abt shit Im tired of sanitising myself #I wanna reclaim slurs I wanna be angry I want to be loud I want to just yell at ppl that they Should be uncomfortable they Should be upset #you Shouldnt let ppl live in bliss you Should feel targeted when I call out your bullshit because I Am talking abt you fucking get over it #I have been teaching and guiding and explaining for as long as I remember and Im So Fucking Sick Of It #but someone has to. if I can get even one person to support us in a way that matters I have to. #I mean I dont. but I want to. except I also dont because its miserable and it fucking kills me to do. but I couldnt live with myself if I #didnt so here I fucking am. #I just want to be angry without guilt for once in my fucking life. I deserve to be. Im tired of pretending Im not. #goddddd Im so fucking mad rn Im sorry but also Im not but yknow. #I just wanna be more confident abt myself in like every regard like I hate how long its taken me to feel allowed to call myself mexican #yknow. a thing I am and always have beem #like I am still also white for sure and was raised in a very white enviorment but that doesnt stop me from being mexican #and Im allowed to reclaim slurs and Im allowed to defend myself from bigotry and Im allowed to be fucking angry abt it #Im allowed to exist as I am. I thought I had gotten to that point a long time ago but Ive been realising that I rly havent. #rat rants #rat vents #ok anyways. I should rly go to bed now lol #Ill probably be feeling better tomorrow but dont let that make you think my burning rage is gone lol #whatever gn gamers

[pizzapizzadickz]

I feel sorta shitty. My hip is sorta out of place so it's tweaking, and mt back is aching a shitload. Ugh.

#diary #personal #i. sorta wonder if i exist. like i do. but when i spend so much time sorta kinda here. i dont really. #i. really dont like people lately. it sucks. i hate trying to talk. then getting talked over. its my fault. #ahhh. im so tired. i dont wanna do anything. #i need to do some laundry so i can like. do stuff. it sucks knowing i need to do it but i just cant #ive just spend the last two days infront of the tv doing nothing but reading n shit. #it feels like its been a week. just absolute monotony. #i wonder why ppl sometimes suddenly stop talking or start talking to me. #i mean. ive sorta gotten used to it by now. its why i dont have friends though. #the way i used to try to keep hold of ppl is just talk with them a bunch. and just. force myself into their lives. #never rly works. sorta feels like nothing i do does. #i dont wanna work. god. even though i am working i still feel utterly useless. and i am. #im really lonely yknow. but im also not. i just want the things i think i want. but dont actually. #yknow? everything i want is fake. its not real. im loved but im not. im tired but i just need to try harder. #ahh. im so fucking tired. god i wish i wouldnt wake up tomorrow. its just another fucking boring day. #im so bored yknow? whats the point really lmao. haah. why do i try lol. #i guess i dont though. so its my own fault. its just all so boring and tiring. i hate it here.

[kuiinncedes]

sdjjgfghjfbmcnv

#not me missing getting the bathroom by like 2 seconds again #sry roommate but she takes so long and i think i take not as long TT #and it's just kinda frustratinggggg like on my part ig bc i could just be faster lmfao #but then i feel like thats why im lowkey more comfortable just . #waiting until fucking 2am or whatever when ppl are asleep or have alr gotten ready for bed #so i kinda know im usually like not keeping anyone from using the bathroom/getting ready for bed/whatever #y this happen so much tho ;-; i feel like so many times ive been like About to Start moving to the bathroom to get ready lmao #and then my roommate just up and takes the bathrom instead #rip me going to sleep earlier than like 1:30 today :DDD #anyway it's fine :'') #i'm just tired ;-; rip #jeanne talks #well i was gonna give up on the .5 hour left of research work to get me to an hour for 'today' bc i was falling asleep #but looks like i can do that now lmfao #not that the falling asleep part has changed :'') #and ofc my laptop/the research database is not working rn we love that #._. not going to sleep before 2 today rip #ik i shouldnt be like annoyed w my roomate or anything lol #and i am not rly but the petty side of me does want to be like girl #anyway ;-;