Tumgik
#ive never felt this ill before and i hate it
artystaroc · 5 months
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Could you perhaps draw Pomni pls she’s a little scrunkly
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She's like a sad puppy, poor confused lil thing
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qumiiiquinnquin · 5 months
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my art will never be good enough !
#vent#im so hypocritical#i give advice on how to not feel terrible about ones own art and then i want to burn all my traditional art and delete all my art files#i cant even follow my own advice. ive wanted to burn and delete my art for several years now and i am very close to doing it#its so hard to not compare myself to others. its so hard to not think that what I make isn't good enough. everyone else can make so#much more beloved art. and they all know that ill never amount to anything no matter how much time ans effort i put jnto an art#it will never be good enough. I will never be good enough.#since I cant stop why dont I just post art then bounce and not scroll afterwards? ive done that multiple times now#but it feels very isolating and lonely. So I can deactivate and leave social media for good so I stop always comparing numbers#but it bleeds into real life. i actually felt this terrible about my art before creating any social media and posting my art in 2020.#i just know that nowhere am i good enough.#I hate that i think these things and am acting like this. I need to quit and discard everything giving up would benefit everyone#in fact why dont i go commit sewercide and officially rid myself since i cant think anything without wanting to commit over it lol#everyone says take a break but i will just come back feeling fine then it will quickly evolve into feeling this exact same way again.#'take a break' I might as well fucking quit for good like I want#making art makes me happy and helps keep me going. but at this point im not happy doing art anymore so I have nothing keeping me from#giving up on being alive anymnore
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cottonplushes · 8 months
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havent felt this violent about anyone in a while....
at least with this fictional loser i can actually have fun with it
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angelhound · 1 year
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#have been writing lately instead of painting and idk…. how i feel about that#never have i considered myself a writer#i mean i write bad romantic poetry sure. but im writing fiction. novels if u will. and i Like it. :/#its uncomfortable. idk. maybe if i make companion paintings itll feel less obscure. perhaps a web comic will come out of it#ive never been into structured writing ever ever. but it felt… salty. like sweat drying on your skin. gratifying. to finish a whole piece.#it was a fit of mania perhaps. and i have more still bubbling there is much to create. i just have never created in this format before#hate it almost. digging my heels but its pointless to resist where the water knows to go you know? i cannot feel this way about painting#if that is not what is meant to be made at this time. the wild horse of inspiration will not bend to my comfort#yes i know i am an artist in the worst way. yes im aware of how i sound. i am not proud but i suppose i cannot either be ashamed#if i cannot be another way#idk i always wanted to be an airhead lol. before anyways. my grandfather does not understand his gift is as enviable as my own#hes not an airhead you could not imagine so after listening to him. but he is enigmatic in that way.#socialized better maybe. the gift of living as you imagine because you are not imagining at all#i never wanted to be reclusive. driven by fits of madness. but i dont have another way known to me#the life i imagine is lived by those who are not imagining it#but idk i think less nowadays. it helps to figure myself an unsocialized dog. something to be solved by careful hands#ugh. god with how i talk sometimes i wonder how it surprises me to become a pos writer. who else talks like that#anyways im incredibly ill still lol going to again attempt to shower the virus out of me
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Whoever said you can't miss something you never had in the first place was dead wrong.
If anything, you miss it more because you never got to have the good thing at all. Better to have loved and lost than never loved at all kind of deal.
It's a weird ache of longing, to feel empty because of something that was never there. Because it could have been. Why couldn't it be? Why do others get the pleasure that's been denied to you.
They may mourn over what was lost, but in mourning, they acknowledge they had something good at some point. Meanwhile you mourn for a possiblity that never was. A kindness from the world that was never given.
So you just continue to watch on as people enjoy a happiness you will never experience first hand.
And that hurts in a very specific way.
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doctapuella · 5 months
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i took the biggest fattest couch nap today like a middle aged dad. and do i feel like i wasted my whole day? yes. but do i at least feel extremely rested? absolutely not.
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tinyidle · 2 months
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his arms- nsfw, body appreciation, groping, heavy heavy teasing
bare with me as i share a mini fic on this big baby full of muscles
"see?" mingi asserted, showing the flex of his bicep and tricep, casually running his hand over it before pulling his arm sleeve back down, effectively hiding what he was packing. "i told you ive got a sleeper build."
as much as you wanted to make a snarky remark or roll your eyes or even start up a different conversation altogether, you couldn't shake the fact that you wanted to feel his arms near you. or on you, whichever was more convenient.
biting your lip and swallowing the last bit of pride and shame you had in your throat, you carefully asked your boyfriend, "can i feel them, ming?"
the tall man made a noise of confusion before what you asked finally resonated in his brain. "ohh, so you admit i have a sleeper build?"
your hand collided with your forehead in frustration-- both mental and sexual. "yes, mingi," you gave up, "your body is very unpredictable. now put that same body to use on me before i grab my hitachi."
mingi's pearly eyes widened in slight fear from your threat. you know how much he hates when you decide to use your toys when he's right there, especially when he's free to help you out. "no no!" he frantically chanted, grasping onto your waist as you turned to search through your drawers. "ill help you out. just please don't use the wand."
sighing in content, you nodded. "deal," you smiled, almost immediately lifting your boyfriend's sleeve. you felt every hard muscle and hidden vein slightly protruding from the inside of his arms, leaning in to kiss the tall man by the jaw.
mingi lowly groaned as all your attention was garnered towards his arms, with his jaw and neck being occasionally peppered with your sweet kisses.
"you always look so good, ming," you praised him, your hands now traveling across his chest before trailing down to the waistband.
your finger trailed across the thick ribbed material adorning your boyfriend's slim waist before deciding to pull off his tshirt. you tugged on the hem, giving him a signal to help you out his top garment before deciding to do the same with your own bottoms-- which were simply panties. it was night, so you didn't feel the need to put much on more than your boyfriend's tee and your undies.
giving your attention back to the band, your fingers tugged before looking up at mingi in expectation. with a simple nod of his head, you pulled down his bottoms off, leaving him bare while you were half-exposed. mingi wouldn't have it any other way, however.
biting his lip, the tall man pulled his tee you were wearing up to your breasts, sighing as his huge hands gently squeezed at them while you lightly whined at the action. "please," you slightly begged. you needed his arms to do more than simply aid to being connected to his hands.
"of course," he murmured, leaning up to give you a loving kiss before putting his heavy cock on top of your clit; right on top of your aching cunt.
something you and mingi love to do at night is tease each other like this: act like you're fucking when it's simply making almost invisible love. you don't want to actually feel him, as he just want to visualize how deep he goes inside you.
tapping his cock head on your engorged clit, he whispered rather huskily, "ready?"
"yeah," you rhythmically nodded, prepared to have your mind fucked. mingi put his arms next to your head, leaning down to capture your lips in a heated kiss before thrusting his hips to meet yours.
you whined in his mouth as you felt his balls make a lewd smack on your sealed yet moistened cunt. nothing was in you, but from mingi moving as if he was rocking your world out your brain in a frenzy. it didn't help that, when mingi put his hands behind your head and put his strengths to use, you could feel his length reach near the tops of your ribcage.
"fuck, mingi-" you choked out a flustered moan, so amazed by how this man never failed to remind you of how strong and sexy he is. "you're so good to me." your hand clutched to his arms as to get a grip of some reality, although in reality you were on cloud nine.
the man smiled. "yeah?" he responded, his right hand moving from your head to your wet cunt, moving his finger inside until his could simply rub the labia area while ghosting your hole entirely. "you feel so good, baby. so wet and responsive to me. should i always show my arms for you to feel this way?"
you moved your hand to somehow play with the top part of mingi's shaft, making him throw his head forwards in a whiny grunt. "yes, ming. as long as i can give you my appreciation to your physique."
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aphroditelovesu · 3 months
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Yay! I'm so happy you write for Baldwin IV!!! Could you do general yandere headcanons for him? Thank you!💗
''Nothing is more important to me than you.'' — Baldwin IV.
❝ 📜 — lady l: I got a little excited, but I hope you like it. I've always wanted to write for him and I finally got the chance! Good reading and forgive me for any mistakes! ❤️
❝tw: obsessive and possessive behavior, mention of murder, manipulation (sorta of), unhealthy relationships.
❝📜pairing: yandere!king baldwin iv/leper king x gender neutral!reader.
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Baldwin had always been shy in his obsession with you, always self-aware of his illness that had left him forever disfigured. He was afraid that you would find him disgusting, that you would hate him and he didn't want that. Baldwin couldn't handle it if you hated him. He wanted to be loved by you, but he was too afraid to talk to you directly for quite some time.
So he remained in the shadows, hidden and longing for you from afar. Even before becoming King, he already dreamed of you and these desires only became more frequent after he became sovereign. He was precocious and maintained a good shape and physical appearance and was optimistic about his illness, but as he grew older he felt increasingly disturbed by the idea of you hating or despising him.
That doesn't mean he ignored you, Baldwin never did that and never will. He can't bear to be away from you, at least not physically, and he can't even go without talking to you. Talking to you was what cheered him up when his mind was consumed by dark thoughts. You were his light.
Baldwin will make sure that once he becomes King, he can ensure that you are well, that you are living well and with the honor, the wealth that you deserve, in his domain. He will do everything in his power to make sure you are eating well and will even go so far as to offer you an official position, if you don't already have one, so he can take care of you.
Although he prefers to stay away so he can also protect you from his illness, that doesn't mean he will allow you to be taken away from him. You may not know it, but you belonged to him. Any love interests or potential suitors/lovers will be quickly and quietly dealt with. Baldwin is not cruel and does not intend to be, but he will become a monster for you.
If he could, Baldwin would marry you, but due to his illness, he is prevented from doing so, so he prefers to keep you close while giving important positions to you or your family. It's a way of ensuring the loyalty of those important to you and having you close by. There are only benefits from his perspective.
Baldwin is remembered and admired for being a competent king who brought prosperity to the Kingdom of Jerusalem, but little is known that the real motivation was you. It was you who held power over him, who influenced him to do anything you wanted. He could become a tyrant if you asked him to. But he feels proud of himself for having met your expectations for his government.
When he has to go out to protect and defend Jerusalem, Baldwin will probably take you with him. He could leave you to take care of State affairs, but he can't bear to be away from you. He is quite clingy although he doesn't always touch you physically, he still needs to be in your presence. It's a constant need, Baldwin feels like a part of his heart withers when he's away from you.
Baldwin may not be able to be with you the way he would like and this has only served to increase his possessive tendencies. He won't allow other people to get too close to you, to steal you from him. Even though you can't officially be his, that doesn't mean he'll let you be someone else's. He will have no problem sending the person who threatens his position in your life to a deadly skirmish, arrest or even executed.
He is neither cruel nor sadistic, but for your sake he will be willing to commit the most heinous crimes just to ensure that you remain by his side. Baldwin needs you like he's never needed anyone before and he knows he'll be destroyed if anything happens to you.
If it were to happen to him, Baldwin will make sure you are safe and protected, perhaps even naming you his Heir. He wouldn't want to leave Earth without you, but he's not selfish enough to want to kill you. He wants you to live a long and happy life, preferably single, even if he's not by your side. He is completely selfless and you will always come first for him. First you and then his duties.
There is nothing he wouldn't do or give to you. Titles, official positions, riches, clothes, jewelry and food in abundance, anything you wanted, he would do it in the blink of an eye. Baldwin trusts you blindly, going so far as to obey your orders on any issue, from food to military matters.
Baldwin IV is a great soft for you and you only. He may seem weak, but that's all he isn't. He is intelligent and knows how to make rational decisions and he will do that with you. Because he loves you, he depends on you and because you are his hope. His light. Don't leave him or Baldwin will go crazy and even go so far as to commit suicide if you abandon him.
You are his greatest strength and his greatest weakness.
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vitalviolence · 4 months
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I will never get over Sejanus because hes literally the loml like one chance bro
Sejanus x snow!reader (maybe a sibling or another cousin i just like the concept of him being with someone related to the guy that betrays him)
maybe during the 2nd portion of the book maybe snow like questions reader about why theyre going for sejanus of all people and it sparks a light argument then some fluff with sejanus maybe some comfort over the marcus stuff because lord😭
you slay so hard
DON'T LIE
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you hated being corios sister, it was horrible. he was a pure asshole who believed that he had power over you but he didn't and he never did. you broke the rules, you broke him. you destroyed your brothers mental health and the way his life should be. you knew what you were doing and you took it with pride.
when you started dating sejanus, you could see your brothers mind moving; he was pissed at you for every reason. for getting involved, for dating his friend, for ruining his plan, for everything and you sat back with a smirk on your face and an evil plan. it was evil and brilliant.
what you didn't would happen would be your brother coming to you and confronting you about your relationship. he truly believed that it had nothing to do with your emotions but everything to do with him and his ideas. he was self-obsessed and you were ready to rip him to pieces.
"why sejanus of all people? why him?" he asked as he paced your room back and forth and then he stopped to stare at you.
"because i like him. i want to be with him, ive always liked him. this has nothing to do with you or the games" you stated and he scoffed
"bullshit, it has everything to do with me. don't lie" he said and you got up and in his face.
"you have always been a self-righteous asshole who has to make everything about him. for once in your life, this has nothing to do with you. you always think it does and it doesn't. i can't believe that for one second, you don't think that this is me deciding that i want to be happy. he makes me happy" you stated and he stared at you
"get out" he said
"what?" you asked
"get out, until you break up with him and tell me the truth about all of this. you will not live you and you are not my sister, now get the fuck out" he stated and you laughed
"okay, ill just go stay with him which by the way makes us closer and forces me to be with him. this is your fault" you spoke and you grabbed a bag of things before you left the house and went to sejanus.
you knocked on the door and he opened it with a sad look on his face as he looked at the bag and then at you
"he kicked you out?" he asked and you nodded. he let you in and you dropped your bag as he hugged you and you hugged him.
'"its okay, we'll be okay. we always are" he stated and you nodded. being with him made everything better and you felt safe with him. you would be okay and you weren't lying.
A/N: hes so pookie bear. also fuck snow fr
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thegettingbyp2 · 2 months
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aaa ive never sent a request so idk if i'm doing this right but!!
can i request a billy the kid x a female character who has a terminal illness? like him comforting her after she almost dies due to her condition and it's cute and fluffy
I'm Not Going Anywhere
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You were laying on your bed, your face pale and blood speckled in the corner of your lips. You’d been suffering from consumption for the past couple of months and every day that went by, the weaker you felt. But something that made you feel even worse was watching your boyfriend stick by your side, knowing that this was hurting him too. Billy had lost his mother and younger brother to consumption a few years ago and it was killing you to put him through this again.
You were recovering from a particularly bad week or so and Billy hadn’t left your side once. He was sitting next to your bed, one of your small, cold hands wrapped in both of his big, warm hands, lifting your hands to his lips every couple of minutes or so. He even kept a damp cloth nearby in case you got hot or so he could gently wipe the blood from your lips.
‘I’m sorry,’ you practically whispered, not strong enough to speak any louder.
‘What are you sorry for?’ he asked gently, furrowing his brows slightly as he pressed his lips to your hand again.
‘Putting you through this, I would understand if you wanted to leav - ’
‘I’m not going anywhere,’ he replied, cutting you off, moving to the edge of his seat to be closer to you, using one of his hands to cup your cheek and stroke your cheek with his thumb as he looked into your eyes. ‘I love you. You can’t get rid of me that easily.’ You smiled at him softly as your eyes filled with tears that you refused to let roll down your cheeks as a shiver wracked your body. ‘You cold?’ Billy asked as he reached to grab another blanket for you.
‘Will you come and lay with me?’ you asked quietly.
‘You don’t need to ask,’ he said, instantly moving to lay down on the bed with you, being careful not to jostle you too much as he pulled you into his arms. You felt your body instantly relax just by being in his arms and his body heat felt amazing against your now-freezing cold body. Burying your face against him, you pressed a gentle kiss to the base of his throat, breathing in the scent that was just Billy.
‘Tell me about what we’re going to do when I get better again?’ you asked. You both knew that there was no getting better for you but you loved the way Billy would talk, how animated he’d get when he’d tell you about all the places he’d take you; it was a way for the two of you to forget about what was happening for a while.
‘Course, baby,’ he murmured, kissing the top of your head before pulling you against him tighter. ‘So, the second you’re better, I’m going to take you out on my horse and we’re going to go for a ride far away from here. We’ll go somewhere where it’s just grass and trees and we’ll spend the day just the two of us, the fresh air, no one around to bother us. And then we’ll get you a horse and I’ll teach you to ride and we can go out whenever you want, how does that sound?’
‘I can’t wait,’ you said, your voice muffled by his shirt as your tears began to track down your cheeks.
‘Me neither, how you feeling?’ Billy asked, lifting your head up to meet his gaze, his thumb wiping away your tears.
‘Tired,’ you replied with a sad chuckle as the sound of Billy’s voice paired with the feeling of his arms wrapped around you and his chest rising and falling underneath your cheek had your eyes fluttering closed.
‘Then go to sleep, love, I’ll still be here when you wake back up,’ he pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead, keeping his lips against your skin as you let yourself fall asleep, feeling safe in his arms.
When he realised you’d gone to sleep, Billy let a couple of his own tears fall, hating that you were the one suffering and not him; sending a silent prayer out that you’d wake up again.
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omgjumin · 5 months
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firsts with han jumin <3
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summary: the first time you hug and kiss jumin
tags: jumin has mommy issues (me too), he's just a man in love, gender neutral reader, canon compliant, fluff just fluff
notes: ive noticed the myms fandom is starting to get more active, so i got jumin brainrot and made this, i could make a nsfw second part for this if you guys want anyway
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the first time you hug jumin is after the party. you wrap your arms around his waist and hold him close to you without letting go. jumin is so warm, the way his body immediately reacts to your touch and relaxes upon embrace. his heart is beating faster and faster with each passing minute and jumin can't help but smile at your affection. but jumin has never really liked hugs or anyone touching him in fact. his father was never really around him when he was a child and some part of him wondered why even though deep in his heart, he knew why. his birth mother only left a deeper hole in his heart after she divorced his father. jumin never received love when he was a child and he's accepted it. yes, his father gave him gifts that he only hoped were full of love when the time was necessary but jumin never felt the love that he truly craved.
he was casted away, locked behind a door that separated him and his mother for hours at a time. the basement that held no ones presence but his and toys. he wasn't a normal child, at least that's what he was told. no one has given him true affection up until now. he's almost expected that he'd hate affection whenever it was directed towards him. but when you wrap your arms around him and lay your head against his chest, he doesn't know what to do. he tries almost as naturally as possible to bring his arms up to hold you as well. yet you could feel the awkwardness behind his actions. you find it funny almost. you have a silver band that fits perfectly around your ring finger and a matching one on his yet jumin doesn't know how to hug you back.
you laugh softly as you tilt your head up to see the awkward love struck man. "you're going to have to get used to this." you say almost in a mocking way but your words hold no malice towards him. jumin could only laugh softly before nodding his head to your words. it's only been a few seconds yet jumin never wants to leave your embrace.
the first time you kiss jumin is right before you leave his penthouse for the first time. jumin kissed you on the first morning of you staying there in front of sarah, yet you had no time to react nor kiss him back. your mind was hazy, should he really be kissing you while elizabeth was still missing? should his soft lips really be on yours in front of sarah, when you could've sworn you were just a friend. yet when v comes to take you home, you stood in front of jumin, your hands reaching forward to grab his. "even when you're still standing in front of me, i miss you." jumin whispers as if he wanted no one but you to hear. "ill miss you too." you say quietly even though you were going to see each other again in less than 24 hours. 
jumin is scared that if he touches you more, he won't be able to let you go. that maybe he'll just send v away, tell him that you might as well stay here with him. jumin will excuse it as the potential of danger but he's trying to convince himself more than anyone else. his head is still tied in knots but when he feels your lips on his, there's a moment of tranquility in his brain. where peace takes over, there's only sounds of ocean waves crashing, birds chirping, the sound of your voice calming down his rushing heart. jumin can't help but close his eyes and just hope this moment never ends. he feels your lips moving against his very gently as if he was a fragile glass flower. jumin almost feels guilty, his heart is racing and he feels fragile in your touch but shouldn't he be making you feel that way? as soon as his eyes flutter open, you pull away slowly and smile up at him. if jumin didn't know any better, he would've collapsed on the floor. the dramatic fall that he saw so many times in soap operas. you were so pretty, enough to make him fall in love with you even more than he already was. his heart is beating against his chest even harder now and it only took one look from you.
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akunya · 1 year
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“you’d make a good pet.”
pairings: fulgur ovid x m!reader x uki violeta
summary: psyborg takes matters into their own hands to cheer you up. you enjoy it more than you thought.
tw: DOUBLE PENETRATION, DIRTY TALK, threesome, degrading + praise. dubcon, mindbreak, size difference, reader has small dick (LOL). psyborg, PETPLAY, fingering.
notes: ive had this idea on my mind ever since i read a vox fic that’s somewhat similar. this is.. dirty. LOL.
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when fulgur had noticed you were feeling a bit under the weather, he felt his heart thump with worry. lately, you had lost the shine in your eyes - the smile that he and uki adored. you were an odd trio, and while your two friends were dating each other, they never made you feel ostracized or out of place. the cyborg and psychic always looked out for you and made you feel comfortable.
what better way to lift your spirits than by making you feel good?
“that’s right, look at you. such a pretty boy. do you like how uki’s mouth feels?” fulgur practically purred in your ear, broken sobs leaving your lips as uki laid between your legs. the psychics mouth felt nearly too good, making you shiver and drool. fulgur let your top half lay against his own body, the cool metal of his fingers playing with your nipples. it was all too overwhelming, making your head spin with pleasure.
fulgur’s hands were the only thing keeping you grounded, squirming like a bitch in heat. before you could properly respond using your words, uki had pulled off your cock with a lewd 'pop'. he looked up at you, licking his lips. he looked so calm and collected while you looked like an utter wreck. “he won’t stop shaking and bucking into my mouth. he likes it.” the low moan that left your lips was pathetic. the way he talked about you as if you were a mere pet made you shiver at your core.
fulgur chuckled, fingers threading themselves in your hair as uki went back to sucking you off. “you’re doing so well, y/n. are you enjoying yourself?” you whined, mumbling out a yes. the gentleness that fulgur had given you compared to uki’s roughness was too much to handle — and yet, you didn’t want it to stop. he was purposefully holding himself back, preferring to take things slow. your cute little moans really pushed his limits though. watching you squirm and moan like a slut just from a blowjob made the hard-on in his boxers harder to ignore. the couple was enjoying themselves much more than they thought they would.
when uki had noticed how you tensed up, he pulled off of your cock again, licking his lips clean of your precum. “sorry, y/n, but i can’t let you cum just yet. it would be no fun if you tapped out now, silly boy.” he smirked, getting up to sit on his knees. you gulped, frustrated but finding yourself nodding anyways. how could you say no when uki looked at you as if you were his next meal?
too many hands to count were on you, spreading your legs to show off your little hole. your cock was still painfully hard, leaking and throbbing as uki circled your ass with the tip of his lubed finger. it pushed in with ease, fulgur groaning at how pliant and obedient you were. his fingers dug into the softness of your inner thighs, keeping them open so both he and uki could ogle at your body.
"fuck, what a good boy you are. let uki stretch out that little hole of yours good, okay? i wanna be inside you.." even the psychic felt his ears go red at that comment, both of you speechless and more turned on than ever. uki had a slick tongue of his own, sure, but fulgur sometimes spoke so .. raunchy, that the man had to give himself a moment to speak. it was much different than vox. fulgur noticed this, chuckling as he let his hands wander again. his eyes locked onto ukis, winking devilishly. "don't get too excited now, uki. ill reward you some other time." the psychic gulped, hating how flustered the comment made him, taking his anger out by thrusting his fingers faster inside of you. you cursed under your breath, groaning as your cock twitched at the rough treatment.
fulgur shushed you, metal hand turning your jaw to face him as he leaned in for a kiss. you didn’t bother fighting back and let him dominate your mouth completely while his tongue danced against your own. the room felt filled to the brim with wet, naughty noises — if you weren’t so dizzy from the attention, they’d almost be comical. after stretching you out with four of his fingers, uki began squirting more lube on his cock instead. you could barely pay attention, panting from fulgurs deep kiss.
“god y/n, you’re so tight..” uki hissed, sighing in relief as he slowly pushed himself inside of you. you couldn’t help but moan at the feeling. it was a miracle you hadn’t cum yet, mind feeling incredibly dumb as fulgur held your legs open. “you like being filled, pretty boy?” the cyborg licked the shell of your ear, tears threatening to fall from your eyes when uki started to roughly pound into you.
what did you do to deserve this? the couple put all of their attention on you, making sure every part of your body was engulfed in pleasure. all you could do was nod, afraid that if you spoke up you would really begin to sound slutty.
meanwhile, uki had no problem indulging in himself. the psychic slammed his hips into yours, deep languid thrusts in and out of your hole making you both go crazy. he had leaned right next to your neck, kissing and biting as he fucked you. it almost made fulgur jealous. almost, that is, until he had a brilliant idea of his own.
“uki, can you pull out a bit? leave just the tip inside.” you blinked through your tears, confused. did fulgur want to stop? his boyfriend was having sex with you after all. maybe he had realized how weird the situation was and wanted out. you wouldn’t be surprised, but couldn’t hide the disappointment you’d feel. “give me the lube, too.”
fulgur kissed your cheek, hands lifting up your hips and positioning you better so that his own cock could teasingly press against your hole. “b-but, ukis still inside—!”
“and?” he chuckled, uki holding your hips so you wouldn’t fall as the silver haired man tried to squeeze himself inside. “relax, y/n. it’ll feel good. we’ll take care of you.” uki commented, smiling softly and rubbing little circles onto your hip with his thumb. you swallowed thickly, trying your hardest to relax and loosen up.
before you knew it, fulgur had finally slid his cock inside, causing all three of you to moan at the feeling. he was much thicker than uki, your hole feeling especially full even though he was only halfway in. uki took the opportunity to kiss you this time. his lips hungrily moved against yours, however, he was still softer than fulgur. you laid there like a good pet, sandwiched inbetween the couple as they slowly started to move their cocks in and out.
fulgur was surprisingly the most vocal, groaning and whining in your ear the entire time. “i didn’t take you for such a slut, y/n. your ass is practically milking my cock. how long have you wanted this for?” his deep voice made you shiver, playing with your own chest as he moved against you. “im not a slut..—“
it was ukis turn to giggle, squeezing a copious amount of lube onto your hole to help with the friction. “you’re still painfully hard, y/n. you didn’t even cum once. only a slut would still be turned on after this.” his tongue darted out to wet his lips, pushing your legs back so he could fuck you deeper. “you remind me of a dog. it’s cute.”
“a dog? i like the sound of that.” you couldn’t see it, but you knew fulgur was grinning like the sly little fuck he was, accentuated by a hard thrust into your ass which made you cry out. “what do you think, y/n? do you want to be our puppy?”
you hated how horny that made you. you wish you could’ve covered your face in shame, but being practically split open by two bigger men didn’t allow such leeway. “we’d give you all the attention you want, yknow. you’d be the prettiest puppy.” one of ukis hands wrapped around your cock, jerking you. you groaned from the overstimulation. it was so, so much. uki and fulgur didn’t bother slowing down their pace, the sheer size making a small bulge in your tummy as they rearranged your insides.
fulgur noticed how your hole tightened around his cock, eyes fluttering shut as you began to squirm even more. “the puppy is close, uki. if you keep that up he’s gonna cum.” uki laughed at that, squeezing your cock and watching you sob even louder. the three of you were alone in the house, but with the sound of skin against skin and your cries, he was sure the entire neighborhood knew what was going on. “well? do you want to cum, puppy?”
you nodded vigorously, pouting as your body only grew hotter and hotter. fulgur muttered praises in your ear, his strong hands reminding you of just how overpowered you were. uki smirked, eyes narrowing mischievously. “ if you want to cum, then you’re going to have to bark like a good boy.”
fulgur laughed at that, taking note of how your body responded positively. your abdomen was sticky with all of the precum you had leaked out, whining and crying as they didn’t stop. “you heard him, y/n. bark for us.”
it felt like forever, your throat feeling dry as you mustered up the courage to speak. it felt dehumanizing. humiliating. and yet.. you couldn’t help but enjoy it, playing with the fantasy of being your best friend’s little pet to fuck whenever they felt like it. your mind felt beyond broken, the fullness from their cocks making your brain into mush as you licked your lips. “w-woof..?”
your voice was meek. it was rough from all the screaming and moaning the two men had made you do, but their eyes lit up all the same. uki looked down at you with nothing but adoration, gasping in delight before starting to breed your slutty little hole properly. fulgur didn’t trail too far behind, the premise of having a cockslut at his feet whenever he wanted spurring him on, putting his fat dick to use in your ass. uki and him created a fast but deep sync, drooling as you greedily spread your legs open. it wasn’t long before your own cock spurted out thick, white ropes of cum onto your sweaty chest. the two other men didn’t bother stopping, wanting to orgasm too.
“that’s right, take it puppy, take it all in.” fulgur groaned, chasing his own release and cumming deep inside of you, shortly after uki spilled. the loads felt massive, and you were sure your stomach bulged from how much they came in your ass. the couple didn’t bother pulling out, however, peppering you in kisses. their lips felt so soft and refreshing after an intense session, making you mewl and sigh softly.
when they had kissed every inch of your skin they could reach, uki giggled and leaned in to give fulgur a kiss. they didn’t bother hiding it either, sloppily making out right in front of you as if you weren’t there. their tongues pushed against another obscenely, fulgurs moans making uki excited again. you gasped in surprise when you felt uki buck his hips, cock already hard and ready for another round. fulgur didn’t even bother asking you, starting to slowly fuck you again in tune with the psychic.
you were going to be here for a very long night.
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hella1975 · 6 months
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hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x
#seriously another shout out to my mutuals#id particularly like to say thank you to boom who's always right there for me no matter what's happening or how insane im being#and also everyone in our little discord that wound up having to make a whole new channel for venting#bc i was there so often like 'today's weird ask isssss.... telling me about my cupsize!! rip them to shreds!!!'#hannah and theo especially being there and pushing me to finally turn off anon. war is truly over#and of course rori bc the shamelessness u show when hating on my anon asks has been genuinely really cathartic#sometimes u really do just need a rottweiler mutual to tell random people online to kill themselves 😭#okay weird oscar acceptance speechcore gratitude over. i do just rlly love my mutuals#like i went three years not telling anyone about the worse side of internet popularity for fear of looking spoiled and ungrateful#so for the first time to open up about it and be met with outrage on my behalf and people saying in fact it's MORE fucked up#than i initially realised bc ive grown desensitised to it is. yeah cathartic i guess#they are singlehandedly reassuring me of the good this cursed app still holds#so everyone thank them and send them flowers NOW#okay im done i think. see you guys soon. i truly do want to come back asap bc like i said i NEVER EVEN WANTED TO FUCKING LEAVE#SOME ASSHOLES JUST HAD TO PUT GRENADES ON WHAT I ASSUMED WERE VERY UNIVERSAL AND OBVIOUS BOUNDARIES#if you're reading this like 'ohhh fuck i defo sent something invasive lately. i thought it was a joke/we were friends'#then 1) we arent friends if you're on anon. it immediately creates a power imbalance where you know me and any necessary context#but i have no idea who you are or how much you know about me. that's already a fucked dynamic#and 2) I HOPE YOU FEEL BAD. LIKE GENUINELY I HOPE YOU FEEL AWFUL AND HAVE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF#okay i think that's all. ta-ra lads??? how tf do u end something like this#ive queued this to reblog a couple more times throughout the day
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sleepysturnss · 3 months
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LIPSTICK - Nate D.
── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
summary: you and nate have been dating for years, and you two are basically the perfect couple. nate decides to take a pitstop on the way home from shopping.
warnings: ALL FLUFF NO ANGST😍, kisses, cute ass flashbacks n some dancingg❤️
enjoy!! xx ❤️
── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───
i smiled, pinching the tip of a lipstick case, inspecting it before sighing and putting it back in its place.
“whats wrong with that one? i think itd look lovely on you ma.” my boyfriend, nate sighed, placing his hands on my shoulders as he walked up behind me.
“too dark.” i sighed, picking up a few more, repeating the process.
“too light”
“too sparkly.” i scrunched up my nose, shaking my head.
nate watched as i picked through the hundreds of lipstick shades and sizes, occasionally coming behind me and shoving his face into my neck, his way of telling me to hurry up.
“nate i promise ill be done soon” i mumbled, ruffling his brown hair through my red nails, he smiled, leaning into the touch.
he was such a needy boyfriend, like…almost anyone who knew him would think that he couldnt care less about physical touch or quality time, but i knew that he craved that shit.
anytime i was at his house, he was holding me, kissing me, doing anything he could to feel my body heat against his.
like a puzzle piece that just fit, and without him i was just an incomplete puzzle.
like i was almost whole, but there was one piece missing, right in the center.
i liked to say i hated it, his clingy behavior, but i dont think i could live life the same without it, its become part of my life.
nate was wrapped around my heart.
he held it in his soft hands, he could drop it at any moment, but i knew he wouldnt. he would never.
the second he got it, he swore to never let it go, and he stood by his word. he has for three years. ive never met anyone like nate, and id like to think he feels the same about me.
he always knows exactly what im thinking, he can read my thoughts like your reading them right now, its quite impressive actually.
its one of the things i admire most about him, and he doesnt really have to try.
“mama, look at this, it would match your pretty nails.” he smiled sweetly, grabbing a gold lipstick case, holding it up for me to see.
he flashed his puppy eyes at me, like a golden retriever.
i didnt even look at the color before i was handing it to the woman at the register. the look on his face was quite literally priceless, his smile was so cute and genuine there was no way i wouldve said no. it could be a green lipstick, and id have still gotten it.
“you didnt even look at it ma” he whined as i handed the woman my card,
“im sure its perfect nate. besides im just ready to be home.” i shrugged, taking the small bag from her and interlocking out arms.
he smiled, sighing softly, finally being able to get my full attention.
once we got in the car, i connected my phone to bluetooth, hitting shuffle on my playlist.
i smiled when the soft hum of the music play throughout his car, k, by cigarettes after sex.
the muffled rumbling of his worn down honda made the song even better.
his car.
it was the shittiest car i had ever seen.
but i loved it so much.
there were so many memories in this ugly ass car. i always gave him shit for it but i think id kill him if he ever thought about getting rid of it.
“i love this song.” i muttered, running my thumb over his hand. i hadnt even realized he was holding it, it just felt so natural.
“i know you do.” he smiled, glancing at me before shifting his gaze to the road.
“oh really?” i smirked, tilting my head.
“how?”
he rolled his eyes, “you know why.”
i smiled, “yeah i do.”
-
senior prom.
he took my hand, leading me out onto the gym floor.
“i fucking hate this.” i mumbled, scrunching up my nose at the smell of sweat, alcohol, and weed.
“i know mama, but you look so beautiful in that dress, and your perfume smells like heaven.” he whispered, pressing his forehead against mine.
i could not feel my body. the ammount of nerves he gave me made me higher than any ammount of weed i had ever smoked.
i had the biggest crush on him.
i had the biggest crush on my boyfriend.
and he had the same feelings for me.
“i love cigarettes after sex” he mumbled, tearing me from my thoughts.
“what?” i hummed softly,
“i said i love cigarettes after sex.”
“me too” i smiled.
but i could tell that something had changed,
how you looked at me then.
-
i smiled at the memory, almost not realizing that he had skipped the turn onto his neighborhood.
“nate, you missed the…”
i paused, grinning at him as i realized what he was doing.
he smiled back at me, eventually parking his car by an abandoned barn house.
the house we had passed so many times when we were sixteen.
the house that i had always dreamed of owning. dreamed of owning with nate.
however now, it wasnt the same. it had been burned in a fire about a year ago. i was so upset when i found out, it seems silly, but that was like my teenage dream.
i had watched my teenage dream die right before my eyes on news channel five.
but none of that mattered, because i didnt need a white picket fence to prove that i was in love with nate, we both knew that.
eventually, we got out of the car.
he led me down the hill, the little weeds clinging to my sweater, the ends of my jeans lightly coated in the mud that was layered below the pretty green grass.
my stupid converse that i wore to senior prom.
the stupid converse that he had bought me on our very first date.
a size too big.
they still fit. three years later,
they still fit.
we stopped at the bottom of the hill, there was a pond not too far from us, there were still a few stray ducks.
he took my left hand, then my right, pulling my arms around his shoulders, his arms rested on my waist.
“i remember when i first noticed that you liked me back.” he hummed the lyrics of the song we danced to in higschool, swaying us slowly back and forth, the tall grass rubbing against my baggy jeans.
“think i like you, best when your just with me…and no one else.” i whispered, pressing my forehead against his, like we did a few years ago.
“i still get butterflies from you.” he whispered, smiling softly.
“ive still got a crush on you.” i whispered back, the corners of my lips curving up.
“your smiles still as beautiful it was when we were in eighth grade.” he mumbled, playing with a strand of my hair.
“your eyes are just as pretty as they were when we were sixteen.” i tilted my head, my eyes subconsciously falling to his lips.
as if he read my mind, he had leaned forward slightly, pressing his lips against mine.
it wasnt rough or forced, it was the perfect kiss a person would imagine.
like the ones in the movies.
the kinds you read in books, that you laugh at when they say their boyfriends lips fit perfectly together.
i used to laugh, but it really is true.
nate was my puzzle piece that fit perfectly against my lips, against my heart.
he pulled away, a small hint of blush had found its way onto his cheeks.
“youve got the lipstick all over your lips now” i giggled, trying to smear it off.
“stop, stop.” he pushed my hand away from his mouth, laughing lightly. “i like it.” he smiled, rubbing his hands over my back.
i took his hand, sitting down in the grass, pulling him down with me.
we just studied the light blue sky for a while, a comfortable blanket of silence warming the atmosphere.
“im gonna buy this house one day.” he glanced at me, “im gonna fix it up, for us and our little ones.”
“really?” i grinned, leaning into him.
his arm slid over my shoulder, hugging me to his chest,
“yeah.”
-
stop this is so cute i love writing shit like this oddmdme
goodnight cuties xx
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pixelnrd · 3 months
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hello! ive binged your blog this past week and have been so invested and impressed with how professionally everything has been done. I particularly liked the snippets of your 'process' you've hinted at in other asks. I havent been around since the beginning so i wanted to ask what inspired you to undertake such a large project! or, rather, did you expect it to be as big as it became? each generation has 70+ daily posts, their portrait headshots, family portraits... i love it! were you trying to build an audience when you started out? was it a covid project that you had time to build a huge queue for? i think ill be starting my own narrative simblr here soon and i'd love to hear your thoughts or advice about your journey with it, if any.
Hello and thank you for such a lovely message, it's so nice to receive feedback on the quality of my Decades Challenge because I do put so much effort in behind the scenes thanks to my agonising perfectionism!
As a project it has grown beyond what I thought it would be, to a point that I had to reign it back in in early-2022 because I couldn't keep up. I'll put more detail under the cut ✨
The Langstons started as a covid project in 2020. I was an unemployed student with a lot of time on my hands. I'd done legacies before and was pretty good at getting close to the end so that was the 'project', to do the Decades Challenge. And while looking for inspiration like cc and builds etc I found simblr and discovered people were posting their Decades Challenges here with narrative attached. By this stage I'd already played a fair bit into my Langston family (they had 4 kids by that point) so I decided to start posting my sims as well, which pushed me to put a bit more effort in with shots, story, editing etc because I had imposter syndrome. I didn't intend for there to be much narrative or story, and I think that's pretty obvious when reviewing the 1890s Langstons, but it started to grow as I was posting because I wanted to give my sim characters justifications for their life paths I was sending them on... and it all kind of took off from there, as a Decades Challenge story.
Covid over 2020 and 2021 in my country forced us into hard lockdowns, and over those 2 years I had heaps of spare time for home-based hobbies - so I just kept pushing myself to keep going with my Decades Challenge for something to do. I got really into creating storylines and costuming and wanting to do the project 'justice' because of how much effort was going in and how many generations I needed to cover to finish it. Then I stared doing lookbooks, creating portraits and character pages, and then making cc (which was a fun side project).
I wanted to build an audience at the start because I wanted to gauge whether anyone was as interested in my sims as I was in others', and when I stared getting feedback and responses to my posts it was very validating and flattering, so that spurred me to keep up. I never dreamed it would get the audience it has now! It's nice being told that something you are making is good. IRL at the time, I was pretty miserable - I graduated my Masters without a job, I was trying to conceive and failing, I was lonely due to covid and lost some of the best years of my 20s - but simblr made me happy and was a distraction from those hard things and so I really poured effort into the thing that brought me happiness.
2022 and 2023 forced me to pull back from my Decades Challenge project due to pregnancy and becomming a parent. It felt very natural to drop it at the time, but since finding my groove with parenting and my new life I still want to finish this project because it's been nearly 4(!) years of effort and I'd hate to leave it so close to the end. So that's why I'm still here - in a reduced capacity to what I was in 2020 and 2021 at my peak - trying to get it done. I don't post lookbooks or do cc anymore, because I just don't have the time anymore. But everyone is so encouraging, I have made some nice friends here and I'm constantly in awe of and inspired by the sims, content and stories others are creating. There is so much more potential for historical gameplay in the years since I started my Decades Challenge - farming! horses! infants! - and I hope that my project has inspired others to have a go! That's the best legacy I could hope to leave...
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