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bit-odd-innit · 1 year

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Fic: Somewhere That’s Green

[based on a post I made about Eddie’s future]

It’s a hole in the wall just off the main drag, the kind of place you can’t find unless you know to look. In a previous life it had been a pizzeria, which explained the bright green vinyl awning Eddie had no intention of replacing. He’d kept the pick-up window, too, used it to host “office hours.” (“Office hours” was supposed to mean “deliver personalized music recommendations to interested passers-by.” Now it means “help harried, double-parked parents reschedule music lessons.”)

He’d also kept the apartment upstairs. They have a house now—a nice one, with a wrap-around porch and a big backyard and a cluster of hedges Steve always insists are “a mess”—but when Eddie trips into an inventory hole and loses track of time, it’s nice to have a place to crash. If it’s not a school night sometimes Steve joins him, and they’ll relive the halcyon days of their early twenties, buoyed by cheap beer, diner curly fries, and giddy infatuation. (The infatuation has only grown and flourished even as his tolerance for salty food has withered. Acid reflux is a bitch.)

He’s happy they kept the apartment. He happy knowing that if someone needs it—someone scared, broke, desperate for a lifeline and a scrap of no-strings-attached kindness—it’s something he can provide.

Initial plans had been to focus on music, just music. It was supposed to be the utopic all-metal record store of Eddie’s nightmares. But as he started to build stock, he remembered how hard it had been to find merch for the things he liked. How a pin or a patch or poster he’d dug up at a garage sale four towns over made him feel more seen than anything on offer at the local mini-mall. How he wanted to be a hub for the weird shit not everyone liked, but the people who did loved. His horrible little magpie brain fluttered from shiny thing to shiny thing, and by the time opening day rolled around the store was a one-stop shop for all things music, merch and whatever wacky knick-knacks tickled Eddie’s fancy. Or horrified Steve. Or both. Both was best.

The Corroded Coffin guys slotted in easily. Francis always liked doing promo for their gigs, was good at it, too. But by the early 2000s, his methods were apparently so outdated his daughter begged to let her take over. (“He’s stapling fliers to telephone poles, Uncle Eddie. You don’t even have a website.”

“What is a telephone pole covered in fliers if not the working man’s web-ed site?”

“Oh my God give me your credit card I’m buying you a domain name.”

“A what?”)

Jeff got his CPA and took over the financials, reeling Eddie in whenever he was struck by the urge to make a impulsive, outlandish purchase. (“I genuinely don’t understand how you make money.”

“It’s cause I don’t do my taxes.”

“I do your taxes. At a great personal expense.”)

Gareth was instrumental (heh…) in building up the music program—soundproofing the basement and hiring instructors and coordinating concerts and organizing payment plans, all the nitty-gritty non-music stuff that made Eddie’s head spin. At some point it just made the most sense for Eddie to cede control, let him operate it however he saw fit. (“This is your baby, dude. It’s a baby that took form within my own, much larger baby. But it’s yours.”

“I’m touched by your words and appalled by your phrasing.”

“That’s the only way I could have said it.”)

(Gareth also once described the store as an “Elevated Hot Topic.” Eddie still hasn’t decided when he’s going to kick his ass.)

 Momentum grew. Ideas compounded ideas. A kid asked how to sew a patch to his backpack and it snowballed into the Build Your Own Battlevest Workshop. Wayne suggested knocking out the connecting wall between the walk-in freezer and the pantry, and now thrice weekly Eddie runs table-top games for varying age-sets and skill-levels. (At Steve’s request, the elementary school group is called H-E-DOUBLE HOCKEY STICKS FIRE CLUB. Not because he thinks it needs to be censored. He just thinks it’s funny.) (He’s right.)

It was supposed to be a record store but now it’s so much more. Now there are listening parties and movie screenings and little league teams with his store’s name on the back of their jerseys and and and—

Eddie used to think, if he got lucky, he’d last a year. Now he’s closing in on 30. He was profiled by the local newspaper. They called him “a pillar of the community.”

Wild.

It’s a warm, sunny April morning. He’s sitting at the takeout window, sipping coffee from the bottom half of a teapot-teacup combo that reads, in a menacing blood-red font, THIS FREAK DRINKS TEA. His hair is gathered in a loose braid, the ends still damp from his post-run shower. (Sometime in their mid-thirties Steve tricked him into maintaining a consistent cardio routine, and now he’s the type of person who gets out of bed at the crack of dawn to knock out an “easy three.” He’s a monster, a husk of his former self. A husk with a much-improved lung capacity and thighs that can juice a watermelon but nonetheless HUSK.) The middle school is about a half mile from the shop; he pulls faces at all the students filtering past. (Steve’s kids, current and former, refer to Eddie exclusively as Mr. Munson’s Husband. It never fails to thrill him.)

He’s leaning back to flip the record piping through the store’s speakers (“Dustin I don’t care if it’s ‘easier’ to ‘create a Spotify account,’ whatever that means. We play vinyl only! Let me be pretentious about this one thing!”) when he hears a meek, polite cough coming from just beneath the window. He peers out and on the sidewalk stands a girl. She’s small, too little to be one of Steve’s. She clutches the strap of her backpack, blue eyes huge with nerves and determination.

“Hail and well met, weary traveler!” He’s speaking in what Steve calls his Dork Voice, the slightly tuned-down version he uses to put shy kids at ease. “How might I be of assistance?” The girl purses her lips, sets her shoulders, shakes her shaggy bangs out of her face. Eddie thinks suddenly of Nancy and Robin and his heart clenches.

“Do you like games?” She asks.

He smiles softly. Drops the act. “Yeah.” He rests his scarred cheek in the cradle of his palm. “I like games. Do you like games?”

The dam breaks.

“Yes!” She replies at once, breathless with enthusiasm. “My family plays a lot of board games, like Game of Life and Monopoly, and they’re okay but kind of boring, but my brother taught me how to play Settlers of Catan and I really liked that, and my friends and I played Werewolf at a sleepover but we made up a bunch of extra rules to make it harder, and my cousin showed me this video game where the ending changes based on what choices you make and that’s so cool—”

“Alright, slugger.” Eddie can’t help but laugh. “What game are you looking to play?”

The girl collects herself. “Okay,” she says. “Okay, so. So I like it in games where there are rules, but also you can make stuff up? And you can do something weird that might ruin everything but also might pay off? And sometimes you have to work with other people to accomplish your goal, but alliances can break?” Eddie nods. “So there’s this one game. It sounds like so much fun, but nobody I know plays it. They play it on this show I like, well, okay, it’s not really a show, it’s, uh, okay do you know what a podcast is?” Eddie beams.

Steve swapped study hall coverage so he could pop in for lunch. Tonight is parent-teacher conferences, which means Steve’ll be home late, which means Eddie will get absorbed in a project and either crash upstairs or stumble home well after Steve’s gone to bed, which means they’ve got to snatch the time together they can get. They split a sandwich, a salmon burger from Costco Eddie threw in the air fryer and smashed up with avocado and grilled poblano pepper. (”It’s heart healthy!” “You’re heart healthy.” “Aw.” “I meant that as an insult.” “I’m not taking it as one, mwah mwah mwah.”) Eddie eats too fast, as he often does, and drags his nails over the veins of Steve’s forearm to distract himself from his gastrointestinal tract turning inside out.

“🎶Myyyy babyyyy myyyyyy babyyyyyy,” he hums against the shell of Steve’s ear. “You’reeee my babyyyyy sayyyy it to meeeeee🎶.” “Alright,” he huffs, tapping his fingers to the knobby bone of Eddie’s wrist. He presses a kiss to the underside of Eddie’s jaw and rises. “I gotta get back.” He slings his messenger bag over his shoulder, gathers the papers he’d promised he’d grade but didn’t. Eddie watches him readjust, watches him smooth down the salt-and-pepper hairs dusting his temples, watches him push his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He catches Eddie watching and asks, slyly, “What?”

Eddie wants to say, I love you. He wants to say, you’ve made me happier than I ever thought I could be. He wants to say, I’m so grateful I built this life with you.

But he’s still himself, so what he says is, “Those khakis make your ass look great.”

Steve scoffs, and with a bitchy eye roll he sinks his weight onto his back foot and says, “I KNOW,” and there he is. There’s the man he married. He looks over his shoulder before he leaves, his honey-warm eyes liquifying Eddie’s spine.

“Hey,” he murmurs. “I love you too.” Eddie kisses him and kisses him and kisses him. Pretty good life.

#steddie #stranger things #eddie munson #steve harrington #my fanfic

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defectivegembrain · 2 months

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I can only conclude that there is an alternate version of Community that is quite widely viewed wherein Abed's emotional expressions are censored. Every time he makes a facial expression it is covered over with a blank face. Every time he says something emotional it is replaced by a string of numbers read in a robotic voice. Many scenes with him and Troy are just cut entirely. Classic episodes include Jeff's Controllable Christmas, Virtual Systems Ignorance, and Geothermal Fun Times With No Subtext.

#community #nbc community #abed nadir #ableism #snark #sorry it's just this activates my trap card

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angelisgonnastartchangingurls · 1 month

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robbie on a monday

annie got coffee with her brother robbie at the cafe near her office. he was finishing school. just filed his paperwork for graduation. annie was beaming.

"how are you, though?" he asked her. "dad says you're being kinda weird."

annie laughed. "dad talks too much. i'm just a little bored in my relationship and i'm acting out."

"acting out how?"

"cheating on him," annie said.

"poor ryan," robbie said.

"no, not poor ryan," annie countered. "he's emotionally and physically absent."

"sorry," he said. "just too busy with work?"

"yeah but i'm busy with work too and i can still have sex."

"ok, chill out. honestly, is work hard for you?"

"are you saying my job's easy?"

"no," he said, earnestly. "you're like, very smart. school was always easy for you. i feel like work is the same."

"sometimes i feel that way," annie said. "but i don't know. i think i'm so desperate for excitement that i'm fucking up my patients."

"go skydiving or something, then," he said.

"not a bad idea, honestly," she said.

"no, you're too clumsy. you'd die."

she laughed. "maybe."

she went back to her office after and texted her father "don't tell robbie i am being weird."

"that was not my choice of words."

"ok, well, that was his impression."

"how are you, then?" he asked.

"i don't know. weird!"

she'd been sending nudes to jeff every day. he was only ever moderately enthusiastic and sometimes outright critical. "your tits don't look as big from that angle," he said to one. for some reason it made annie want to impale herself on his (only-average sized -- ryan was bigger) cock.

she told julia about it. not about jim, which was over as far as annie was concerned. she told her about jeff. julia was scandalized but enthusiastically so. "ryan has such cuck energy anyway," she said. "you deserve a mean himbo who will obliterate your pussy."

jeff obliged her on monday night, telling her to get naked for him as soon as she walked in the door, and proceeding to pound and degrade her for two hours. annie was so thriled.

he took pictures of her, too, which annie loved. she touched her clit while he fucked her, she played with his cum, she spread her ass for him.

when she got home, she found a bag by her door, full of her stuff from ryan's house. he'd written a note: "whore."

"oh fuck," annie said. and then her phone started blowing up.

she concluded after a few minutes of panicked texts from julia, hatespeech from her and ryan's mutual friends, and expressions of support and solidarity from other women in her life, that jeff had sent ryan the pictures, and ryan had posted them online.

she found them quickly. she was tagged in them, after all. he'd censored the photos on his instagram story, though not well. her tits were scribbled out but her bald pussy with jeff's cock in it was still visible.

julia, jim, and robbie all showed up at annie's apartment. she was less hysterical than they'd probably assumed she'd be, but she'd also taken two xanax immediately. julia and robbie sat together reporting the photos, which were also on twitter. annie went to the bathroom and threw up, and had to change her shirt. jim helped her with that, which was kind of ironic. in a couple of hours, the photos were down, the hate texts had stopped (julia had blocked all their numbers on annie's phone -- annie had briefly felt a pang of relief that her work email was not currently logged in on the phone, just in case she somehow came across emails from jim. when annie had her phone back she found them and deleted them) and the support was still rolling in. and they were all drunk and stoned.

annie went to bed -- robbie would crash in her bed with her and julia and jim would stay on the couches.

"sorry you had to see those pictures," she told robbie.

"it's fine," he said. "i mean you looked good anyway, who cares."

julia texted her. "don't come out, we're having sex on your couch."

"what if i want to watch?" annie replied.

"ok," julia replied. "come watch."

annie got out of bed.

robbie came out a few minutes later -- by then julia was naked and riding jim's cock. annie sat across from them, watching jim's shaft go in and out. robbie was on the other side of the couch. julia beckoned him closer -- she was facing him. he came over to the edge of the couch, which was low enough that julia could reach out and grab his dick over his shorts. then she pulled it out. annie tried not to stare at her brother's cock as julia stroked it and licked his tip as she bounced up and down. he was big, and so hard that it was standing straight up.

jim came first. annie watched his cum start to collect in rings around the base of his cock as he groaned and grunted. when he pulled out, julia climbed up higher on the couch to suck robbie off more enthusiastically. annie and jim both watched. he came in julia's mouth, and she threw her head back and swallowed it.

"wow," annie said. she was still dressed in the post-vomit pj's she'd been helped into by jim. julia walked over to annie and confidently pulled her shorts and panties down. "this will be so different without the neglected bush," julia said, opening annie's legs.

annie watched both men as their eyes flickered around. julia's ass. annie's visibly soaked panties laying open on the floor. julia's fingers and tongue on and in annie's cunt. annie's mouth as she gasped "fuck, fuck, fuck." annie had a loud, cathartic orgasm. she laid on the couch in a heap as robbie went back to bed. a few minutes later, she got to her feet and wobbled in after him. she slept next to him in her bed fully bottomless, having left her shorts and panties on the floor.

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imagine-knowing-a-name · 1 year

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Shark-napped

Summary: Princess Natasha encourages you to become her personal guard, but before your skill can be tested, you have to stage an important rescue.

Word Count: 3080

Warnings: Swearing, sharknapping

A/N: I’m a liiiittle bit late to release day, but I don’t get to play Tears of the Kingdom for another few days, so to get out all my excitement I decided to write a follow up fic to my previous Zelda inspired Jeff fic: The Kingdom of Yerffej. Enjoy!!

“Mrrr…Mrrrr!”

Your senses awoke all at once; you felt the shove, heard the rustling sheets, and opened your eyes just in time to see the ground hurtle towards you. Pain shot through your whole left side. You’d definitely had better mornings.

The culprit soon emerged; his large head obscuring the ceiling as he hovered over you.

“Mrrr,” he said again.

“Good morning, Jeffrey,” you groaned. “What in the kingdom’s name was that about?”

The land shark sighed and raised a stubby leg towards your calendar, where today’s date was circled in a prominent red marker.

“Shit! Wait. Sorry Jeff, you didn’t hear that.”

Jeff rolled his eyes; you overslept frequently enough that he heard you curse most mornings, even if you liked to pretend you censored yourself around your companion.

Jeff left you to scramble off the floor, while he strolled through his shark-flap to do whatever it is that land sharks do in a day… you still weren’t sure what that was.

In the meantime, you’d gotten up and rushed to get dressed, though the complexity of your uniform hindered the speed of that progress. Whoever had decided upon the triple layering of an undershirt, chainmail, and your division’s tunic clearly had not designed it with hasty dressing in mind. Add on the trousers, boots, helmet, and belting, and you’d hardly have any time at all with Natasha before your work duties began. Your feet slid across the hardwood floor as you rushed out of your room, you grabbed your belting with one hand and the door with the other, then shut it behind you. The belts were thankfully still together, only loosened the day before, so you threw it over your chest as you ran and tightened the sword and shield to your body on the way.

“Overslept again?” Natasha teased. She’d opened the door on your knock, and laughed instantly at seeing your hunched and panting figure.

“Yeah,” you nodded breathlessly, “be glad Jeff woke me up when he did.”

“Where is the little guy anyway? He’s usually your shadow.”

You shrugged. “He went out this morning, seemed fed up. I’m sure we’ll see him wandering around later.”

“Well, since you’re late, we’ll need to wander and talk too. I have news that I want you to know, but you have to get to work on time.”

“Excuse me, Princess, I’m always at work on time!”

“Only just,” she laughed.

“That’s all they ask for. But come on, we’re walking now, you need to share your news.”

Natasha nodded, then glanced around, as if looking for spies within the palace walls. “Sir Rogers is retiring.”

"Sir Rogers??" you repeated. His retirement was hardly shocking, but you'd still forgotten the day would come. The guard had been serving the royal family longer than you and Natasha had been alive. He'd been Natasha's personal guard since the day she was born, and you'd built up a solid friendship over the years. He'd loitered outside all your lessons, followed you and Natasha around castle grounds when you played as children, he was even the one to first hand you a sword.

"It's going to be odd having someone replace him," you muttered, "what if they're, you know, strict about us being together?"

"He'll be around for a while more, he offered to stay and train his successor."

"Have you chosen them yet? The successor?"

Natasha stopped walking. You followed her lead, then turned so you could face her fully. "That's…that's what I wanted to talk with you about, Y/N." Her eyes were wide when they met yours. They were pleading.

"I'm a knight," you suddenly realised. Natasha laughed, then nodded. She cupped your face with her hands and smiled again. "You are a knight. The trials are today."

"But…if I got it…would you trust me? Would it even be allowed?"

"Y/N, love, I already trust you with every fibre of my body. I've given you my heart to protect, and I know nobody better suited to protecting the rest of me than you."

"Plus if you make the royal guard, you'd be obligated to spend the nights in the room next door to me. Maybe even stay the night if I'm feeling especially imperilled," she added with a smirk. Natasha moved her hands down to wrap around your neck, then leant forward, meeting you in the middle to kiss softly.

"Promise me you'll try?"

"Trust me, princess, you don't have to ask me twice."

You left the castle side by side and began the gentle stroll towards the barracks. You felt Natasha’s eyes on you from time to time, and always looked back at her, meeting her eyes with a grin on your face. To know her was more than enough, but to be her partner was something else. The way her green eyes paled in the sun, while her red hair shone even brighter; you couldn’t imagine anyone more beautiful.

A yell from the academy cut your appreciation short and you scowled. Suspension from the Knights hadn’t deterred Rumlow and his lackeys one bit; if anything, it had caused them to double down on their intimidation act. They insulted you and your land shark whenever possible, and no longer cared about Natasha’s presence.

“Where’s your little ball of salmon, Y/L/N?” Rumlow yelled, “Odd for him to be away from you so long, hm?” His accomplices sniggered behind him, sharing a look you took instantly to mean conspiracy.

“What did you do with him?!” You surged forward. But then Natasha’s hand was on your wrist and you felt the anger diffuse; where your eyes softened, her own hardened, and then, before you knew it, she was storming towards the Academy and you weren’t stopping her.

She halted at such a distance from you, that you couldn’t hear the words spoken, everything but flailing arms and fearful men was lost to the wind. You dared not go closer – this was Natasha’s strength, and you’d never interrupt it. That left you with only one option: stay put and watch your princess at work.

You jumped back to attention when Natasha turned; and when she smiled, with Rumlow and his companions cowering behind her, pride surged through your veins like jolts of electricity. It was impossible not to beam back at her.

“You have to look for Jeff,” she muttered, taking your hands in yours. “They took him while he was out earlier; sent Rollins to dump him wherever he saw fit.”

“Those fuc-”

“Don’t,” Natasha interrupted, a smirk flashing briefly on her face, “I’m going to send Steve to search with you; you know how he feels about language.”

“They took Jeff, Natasha, and we don’t know where he is. Sir Rogers can fucking live with it.”

“Go.” The Princess commanded, a subtle nod accompanying her word. “Without Steve, we can’t judge the trials. Find Jeff and bring them both back, Father and I will delay it until then. Be safe, Y/N.”

Natasha parted with a kiss, before bolting towards the barracks as fast as her dress would allow. You ran in the other direction into the town. Fear clouded your brain, but your one mission stood clear; you had to find Jeff soon. You couldn’t let anything happen to him. You’d never forgive yourself if it did.

“Y/N, wait up!”

"Sir," you said. Steve tilted his head, standing still even when you tried to move along.

"Y/N," he repeated. The gravitas of his tone made you turn around, and this time, you couldn't hide the tears pricking your eyes. "We'll find him," he promised, "you'll find him. And those dickheads won't know what hit them when I have a word with them"

This time, you paused. A smile slowly crept onto your face as you stopped the royal knight. "Dickheads?" you questioned, "I wouldn't expect that kind of language from you, Sir, you've scolded me for it all my life."

"You were a child and a royal guest, Y/L/N. You think I'd let the Princess and her sister overhear that language?" Steve grinned over his shoulder and began to walk off, while you jogged to catch up with him.

"I'm still friends with the Princess though."

"Something other than friends, no? But you're also a knight, and unless the Academy has changed drastically since my time there, I’m sure you’re used to the swearing by now."

"I've known you almost my whole life, I didn't think there was anything else to learn about you."

"There's still plenty to learn, Y/N, and I hope to be teaching you a lot of it after today's trials. I presume Natasha’s told you I plan to retire"

"She did, just this morning. I can't imagine the palace without you."

"I plan to have a worthy successor take over my role, someone just as devoted to protecting the Princess as I have been." Steve watched you, judging for a reaction, while you stared bashfully at the floor. It wasn't hard to tell he was talking about you, but whether it was earnest or in teasing of your relationship with the Princess, you couldn't tell.

"I mean it genuinely." He confirmed, as if he'd read your mind. "The trial has to be fair and open to everyone, so I cannot be biased in my judging. But you are one of the most promising knights I've seen in recent years, you voluntarily accompany the Princess everywhere she goes, and your readiness to track and protect Jeff just lays it clear. Your skill and fidelity to the crown could never be questioned. Show it off when we get back, and I won't have any choice other than to pick you."

You thanked the knight for his advice; if anyone could provide it, it was him.

Throughout your conversation with Steve, you had both been breaking off to question the townsfolk that you passed, in case they had seen any trace of Jeff. Most hadn't, but finally you got a break.

“That Rollins,” a merchant remembered, “he’s part of the group you’re asking about, isn’t he?”

“He is, sir.”

“I saw him earlier this morning, had a massive sack dragging behind him. I thought something didn’t look right there so I followed him. Saw him go into the caves, I did. Think that’s something fishy, isn’t it?”

The caves. He’d taken Jeff to the caves? You felt the blood rush to your brain as your heart rate picked up so much so that the pulse was almost audible in your ears. The cavernous system snaked through the mountain Yerffej had been founded on; stories of what lay inside were told to frighten children, and tremors from shifting tunnels could occasionally be felt in town. It was dangerous, and blocked for a good reason, but you couldn't let that stop you from getting to Jeff.

"That's exactly what I was looking for. Thank you, sir."

You ran off immediately, drawing Steve’s attention. He left his own conversation and took off in a sprint after you. You could explain on the way.

“The caves?” Steve grimaced, with a reaction very similar to your own. Their danger was infamous. You watched as his face contorted with doubt and jumped in to persuade and plead with him.

“I know they’re dangerous, but Jeff is in there alone and I have to get him out.”

“There’s a reason you need a permit to enter,” he sighed, “but I also know that won’t stop you.” Steve met your eyes, then moved. He gripped the pommel of his sword and took a defensive stance in front of the entrance; if he tried to stop you, you would do what you could to get past, but it wouldn’t be successful.

He noticed your face fall, then spoke. “30 minutes,” he nodded, “I’ll stay here in case you get trapped in a rockslide. But if you’re not back in 30 minutes, I’m coming in and pulling you out, even if you’re kicking and screaming.”

The ‘thank you’ could wait until later. You gave a curt nod and ran in, looking back at the light just once before you plunged into darkness.

You had only a lantern as a guide, and a dim one at that; squinting at the uneven ground forced you to move slowly, but you still went forward. Echoes stopped you in your tracks. For a moment they went silent too, and you feared it had just been your own movement…but then it came again: a haunting, faint splash.

“Jeff?” you shouted. You heard the splash again, louder this time, enough to be heard over your own calls for the land shark.

You shuffled over the rocks, hurrying ahead like you had no fear of falling. It soon opened into a cavern, the lake in the middle rippling at the surface.

"Jeff!" you yelled again, and the ripples oscillated, becoming more and more intense. You didn't wait. You stripped yourself of your armour and set the lantern aside before running and diving straight in.

Through the murk, you saw Jeff’s silhouette sat blankly at the bottom. It was only when he caught sight of you that he began to squirm in his weighted chains.

You held your breath and swam deeper. Jeff whimpered, but when you wrapped an arm around his body and pulled him up, you felt his body slacken and small arms wrap around your chest. With one arm, you propelled yourself and Jeff up until you were gasping for air at the surface. Your muscles burned, but with your last bit of energy, you hauled Jeff to shore. The land shark trembled while you panted. Collapsed on the floor beside him, you finally untied the ropes and weights that bound him.

“Mrrrr,” he whined, pressing himself closer again as you took him in your arms. You were both exhausted, but you were together.

“We need to get back,” you muttered against the land shark, “otherwise Sir Rogers is going to get concerned. Can you walk?”

Jeff gave a little nod, taking clumsy steps forward as evidence; it would have to do for now. You refitted your discarded equipment and picked up the lantern, it was time to head back the way you came, only this time with your loyal companion at your side.

“You got him!” Steve cheered the second he saw you, “I was getting worried. Are you all okay, Jeff?”

"Mrrrr."

“Good, because we need to hurry. The day is slipping away and we still have a trial to run; dash on ahead and prepare, it’ll have to start as soon as I get there.”

Natasha’s face lit up brighter than the gold of her throne when she spotted Jeff by your side. Her questions would have to wait though. While she sat regally in the stands, secondary only to her father beside her, you took your place in the sands, kneeling for the two of them. In those moments, you remember the difference between you and her: in your background, in your role, in your relationship. Insecurities reared their heads.

But then Natasha smiled. A genuine smile that asserted the love she showed for you and you alone to know, and it chased away all your worries. In moments like those, you knew you would be with her for life.

“I’d like to hope I’m a frontrunner,” you joked as the princess reached you. She made the rounds at the start of the trials, wanting to assess each competitor up close.

“It’s an unbiased vote, Y/N, you’ll have to show me you’re better than that, hm?” Natasha averted her gaze and moved to the next competitor, but you still saw a ghost of the smirk on her features. She knew what she was doing, just as you knew what you had to do.

The judges whispered amongst themselves after the trials. The princess, king, and head knight confided in each other, while you and the other knights stood to attention in the field below them.

“We have a decision,” the King finally stated. “Knight Y/L/N is to be the new guard of the princess – the role will be effective immediately, but responsibilities will come after a training period from Sir Rogers. I thank everyone for their time today; Knight Y/L/N and Land Shark Jeff, please stay to the end so we may discuss your duties.”

You stood steadfast as the other knights filtered out, nodding courteously at their congratulations. As the door closed on the last of them, the room snapped out of its formal stupor, starting when Natasha ran towards you in excitement. You caught her with ease and pulled her tight, grinning ear to ear as you hugged your lifelong friend.

"Congratulations, Y/N, you deserve every bit of this," the King said with a smile, while Steve nodded his agreement from behind. "I expect you up bright and early to begin training with Sir Rogers tomorrow, but for now, I'll let you and Natasha have your moment."

“Come on,” she whispered, then took your hand in hers, “let’s go back to my room.”

“I’ll have to get used to that, I suppose I’ll be spending a lot of time there to look after my princess.”

“That is your role, my knight. You’ll have to stick close, I think, especially at night. Some dashing knight might try to sneak into my room, you know. It has happened before.”

“That dashing knight did more than just try, I’ll have you know. I mean… surely nobody would be that bold.”

“Only the most daring would attempt it, I’d say.” Natasha laughed, pulling you into her room. “Though, my daring knight, until Steve moves out of his room next door, you won’t have a proper place to stay.”

Jeff ignored your conversation. You saw him leap onto Natasha’s bed out of the corner of your eye, and heard him snoring within seconds.

“I can’t be protecting my princess from the other side of the castle now, can I?”

"You can't, it's a real conundrum. So I suppose, my knight, that you'll have to stay in my room for the time being, just to keep me safe."

"Well, Princess…I'd suppose you're right."

You smiled and fell giggling on the bed with Natasha. From childhood friends to a Princess and her knight, it has been a long journey together, and you couldn't wait to see where it went next.

Jeff Taglist: @wolferine @unexpected-character (also @secretbackrooms just for this one, since you seemed interested!)

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x y/n #jeff the landshark #jeff the land shark #natasha romanoff #marvel #mcu

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radical-revolution · 7 days

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WHEN WE STOP SEEKING APPROVAL

When we aren’t seeking

love and approval from others

When we don’t mind anymore

what they think of us

Whether they like us

Or agree with us

Or understand us

Or even see us

Then we are free

Free to be ourselves

Free to express our authenticity

Free to be wild

Free to be soft

Or fierce

Or silly

Or wise

Or angry

Or silent

Or sensual

Or weird or not

Free to express what’s truly alive for us

And not censor it

Or manipulate it for “likes”

Or control it for “love”

Or moderate it for “acceptance”

We are finally content to be ourselves

Seen or ignored

Ridiculed or celebrated

Loved or hated

Or whatever

It doesn’t really matter

Not on the deepest level anyway

(And it doesn’t mean

we aren’t still open to feedback

and exploring our blind spots)

But we finally approve of ourselves

And accept ourselves

And love ourselves

And feel safe inside of ourselves

So we don’t need to go “out there” for approval

And the hunt for safety “out there” fades away

And we find the deepest safety “in here”

So when they laugh at us

Or dislike our expression

Or ridicule us

Or try to shame us

We can smile

And have compassion

And refocus

And just keep walking the path

The path of authenticity

The path of ourselves

- Jeff Foster

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cryptomiracle · 5 months

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Jeff the killer x tall! fem!reader

(short one-shot)

warnings;

Reader works for Slenderman

This is kinda short lol

Jeff is 5'6(hc), so reader is implied to be over 5'7

This does not apply to my other headcanons for Jeff;?@;#

Mentions of murder

Blood

Cursing, it is censored tho

I apologize if the way I describe rooms don't make sense, I'm horrible at describing rooms lol

-----------------------------------------------

Jeff the killer is a stone cold serial killer, he shows no remorse for his actions, nor any compassion for his victims. He finds pleasure in the pain of others, and takes even more pleasure in inflicting it

Never in a thousand years would anyone think he'd be absolutely head over heels for someone.

But here you are

When Jeff first saw you, he felt a little threatened by you.

The way you towered over him, plus your menacing glare was enough to make anybody uncomfortable.

At first, he'd treat you how he treated everyone.

He'd tease you, steal your things, and start fights with you, both verbal and psychical.

And each time you'd defend yourself, or mess with him, it'd only fuel his hatred for you.

But that changed when he got assigned to go on a mission, with you

it was a simple mission, break into a few houses and kill a few people, you know, basic stuff.

Jeff did the dirty work, as you kept watch.

Everything was going smoothly until you got to the last house, which Slenderman had specifically warned you about.

(Slenderman never really told you why exactly he needs those people killed, but he does tell you what they look like, and how dangerous they may be.)

"maybe we should go in toget-" you were saying, before you were rudely interrupted, making you furrow your brows

"no f*cking way." He scoffed

"you just keep watching, I'll handle it"

"wouldn't want you to get hurt.." he said sarcastically, before walking upstairs, to the master bedroom where the victim was.

You looked at your watch, nearly 5 minutes passed, and he still wasn't done.

You huffed before heading up stairs to check on him.

*CRASH*

You quickly picked up your pace, and you could feel anger bubbling in your stomach thinking of how much he regularly messed stuff up

Once you saw the door, you quickly opened it to see Jeff on the ground, being violently choked by a buff older man.

He was kicking, and scratching at the man, but he wasn't letting up.

The room was completely trashed, there was blood on the walls, and bed.

You couldn't see a wound on Jeff, (except for his ego) so it must've come from the old guy.

He was clearly occupied with Jeff, you took this moment to tackle him.

The old man winced in pain as his back hit the hardwood floor, once he processed what was going on, with one swift move he kneed you in the abdomen as hard as possible

You groaned in pain, as you rolled over onto the floor and quickly placed your hand on the spot he hit.

He wasted no time to get up, and kick you in the stomach.

he pulled his leg back, this time aiming for your face, but before he could land another blow, Jeff jumped onto his back and started biting, punching, and yelling.

His attacks were uncoordinated, and fast, like that of a wild animal.

The man tried to pry Jeff's arms from around his neck, but to no avail.

you ignored the pain in your stomach, and punched the man right in the jaw, causing a tooth to fly out.

The man tried to hit you back, but missed, you then hit him in the lower abdomen, where Jeff had previously stabbed him.

he groaned, before falling back against the window, crushing Jeff under his weight & creating a crack in the window.

"AUGH" Jeff yelled, as he let go of the man's neck.

the man attempted to stand up, before you punched him in the gut

The man winced, you saw as Jeff quickly crawled away from him, and over to the side.

He looked up at you, his face was seething with anger.

(the old guy, not Jeff)

he attempted to stand up, by pushing himself up the window.

*crack*

the window started splintering

Before he could fully stand up, the window busted, causing the man to fall through it.

"OH" Jeff yelled, as he crawled towards the windowsill.

You walked towards the window, and peeked out to see the man's body lying limp, and lifeless across his own driveway.

"what now.." Jeff muttered

"I.. I don't know" you stared at the body in disbelief

After a moment of silence, Jeff sighed.

"thanks,," he said in a tone that was almost a whisper

"what was that?" You looked at him and slightly smiled

He simply stared at you, and frowned

"well.." you huffed as you grabbed jeffs arm and pulled it around your torso

"we gotta go before the police get here" you said as you made your way down the stairs, still holding onto Jeff.

once the two of you made it out of the front door, you started to speak again

"you know-" you paused before stepping into the sidewalk

"that old guy really f*cked you up" you said with a slight snicker

"and look what he did to you" He yelled with no regard with who would hear him

This would cause the two of you to argue all the way to the car.

The ride home was quiet, the only noise coming from the radio.

Jeff decided to ride in the backseat of the car, so he could take a nap while you drove, since he was "more injured"

In all honesty, he pretended to be asleep.

He just couldn't quit staring at you, in what he tried to convince himself was annoyance, or hate and not something else.

A while after, Jeff found himself thinking about you more, and more.

Not just about how much he disliked you, and the things about you that annoyed him, but about how soft and warm you were, also how tough you can be, how you won't take sh!t from anyone, not even him.

and how although you annoyed him, he enjoyed being around you.

but he also thought about how much he hated seeing you around anyone else

He was conflicted, he had spent months holding nothing but contempt for you, and then suddenly you come and 'save' him and he can't stop thinking about you.

It was seriously p!ssing him off

And the more he was around you, the more his feelings grew.

It took a year for him to realize that he had feelings for you, and another year for him to confess them.

-ONE-SHOT-OVER-

sorry this is so short, I started it awhile ago and I wanted to get it out of drafts.. i may make some hcs about this, but anyway ty all so much for the hearts, reposts, and follows, they mean sm to me <3

#creepypasta #jeff the killer #one shot #jeff the killer x reader #Jeff the killer one shot #fem reader #tall reader #creepypasta one shot

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boydepartment · 8 months

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TXT as Creepypasta Stories

a/n: okay so i was a little nervous to post this however i am in a spooky mood and i just wanted to put out something a little silly and fun. i grew up on creepypastas so i wanted to put this out :) i really hope none of you find this post weird LMAO warnings- this is HORROR so subjects of death, bullying, etc is present in this post. i tried to censor it as much as i could and i added my little comments in this as best as i could to make them more lighthearted

MASTERLIST wc- probably like 250-300

soobin- lavender town

lavender town syndrome was derived from the first pokémon game. the bgm of the town in the game had frequencies that led to kids yaknow dying. later on nintendo lowered the frequencies so kids stopped dying‼️

this one was a classic and soobin loves pokémon so i really thought it fit him :)

link to creepypasta

yeonjun- ticci toby

ticci toby’s story is about this kid who’s like extremely bullied and it’s kinda fucked up that the creator named him ticci toby because i’m 90% sure he has tourettes in the story. but that’s besides the point. he ends up like getting rid of his dad and runs in the woods, then gets adopted into the slenderman mansion ⁉️ that’s if i’m remembering correctly LMAO im relistening to the story rn, i forgot how well it was written

I HONESTLY JUST GAVE HIM TICCI TOBY BC I USED TO HAVE A CRUSH ON TOBY WHEN I WAS LIKE 11 now im older than ticci toby and i feel ancient.

link to creepypasta

taehyun- jeff the killer

okay gonna be fr, the only reason why i remember his story so well is because of laurenzsides sims 4 rendition of the creepypasta. jeff was this kid who had a really hot brother(sorry(I AM LIU’S AGE NOW THIS IS A WIN)) and two parents. from what i remember everything was chill w his parents and brother but he was just bullied. and then at a birthday party he got lit on fire??? and bleached??? then he kills everyone. OH MY GOD THE KIDS LIKE BULLIED HIM⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ I DO NOT REMEMBER THIS AT ALL⁉️⁉️⁉️ oh his parents were nice :( this is so sad

i thought giving taehyun a classic was good for him. jeff the killer is like THE creepypasta just like kang taehyun is THE hot guy 😇

link to the laurenzside sims 4 creepypasta video lol

beomgyu- russian sleep experiment

the russian sleep experiment was, you guessed it, an experiment. from what i remember the experiment was conducted during a war to test endurance. the prisoners from said war were told they would be set free if they followed through with the experiment. the prisoners were locked in a room and the scientists leaked this gas in the room to keep the prisoners from sleeping, without having sleep the prisoners go insane and start to kill eachother

the russian sleep experiment is honestly my favorite creepypasta. i read it a few years ago and then shane and ryan read it on are you scared and i was hooked. i feel like beomgyu would really like it.

link to the watcher video explaining the russian sleep experiment

hueningkai- ben drowned

basically this guy, finds a bootleg majoras mask game and starts getting haunted by this kid named ben who once again you guessed it! drowned! okay apparently there was a cult i don’t remember that at all if i’m being fr.

I LOVE ANYTHING LOZ AND IDK I THINK THAT IT FITS HIM‼️

link to the creepypasta

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