I can, I can't : Part 1 of 3
Pairing: Jaemin x female reader
Gener: best friends to lovers au, smut, fluff
Warning: mentions of sex, masturbation (Female)
Summary: Jaemin and Y/N are part of a group of best friends. One day, things change.....
They called themselves the dropouts. Brought up in good Catholic families, active within the Church community as kids, Catholic school education... the works. They then grew up and stopped going.
It wasn't some group thing were everyone agreed to stop going altogether at the same time. It was more like, one by one, they stopped going.
Jeno was the first to stop, at 15, after his parents got divorced. He became angry and withdrawn. By 16 he was mixing with the wrong crowd - think underaged drinking, partying, It was only after a close brush with the law that he - literally and figuratively - sobered up and decided to focus on healthier pursuits like education and sports. Thankfully too, the old Jeno that everyone knew and love came back.
Then were was Renjun. Renjun was always the one who wasn't really into religion anyway. He was more apt to believing in aliens and ghosts. His mother kept him going for as long as she could. By 18 he was out.
Haechan, as he got older, became a sporadic goer. After moving out on his own to live with the guys and Y/N in an apartment closer to campus, he stopped too.
Y/N? The older she grew, the more she learnt about the importance of gender equality. The more she embraced feminism, the more she found some church teachings hard to swallow.
All was left, of course, was Jaemin. Now Jaemin, he was still a "good boy", faithfully going to Church every Sunday. It wasn't that he was extremely religious. It was more that he had gone to Church every single week all his life. To not go one week felt odd and different.
The good thing was, nobody made fun of him or tried to stop him from going. Jeno even woke him up on Sunday mornings before he went for his 10km runs just so Jaemin would get to mass on time. (Mass is what Catholics call a church service.)
Y/N enjoyed hanging out with her friends. She was like one of the boys. It had always been like that since they were young. Everyone who knew Y/N knew she was not to be messed with. Not only was she capable of kicking anyone's balls, she also had four bros who would come after their ass too. In fact, guys who were interested in dating her would often try to get in good standing with the four guys so life would be easier for them. So it was hardly surprising that Y/N had never had her heart broken.
The problem was, Y/N was the one breaking hearts. Commitment wasn't her strongest suit, and more often than not she'd break off with whoever she was seeing with very trivial reasons, First she was dating Xiaojun. Then 7 months later she broke it off with him because apparently he "sucked at making out". The truth was, Xiaojun was good enough in bed but Y/N wanted to date the more exciting Yang Yang after meeting him at a frat party her gal friends dragged her to and making out with him. So Yang Yang it was. For a while she was happy. But then 10 months passed and Yang Yang was history. Now it seemed, was some guy called Lucas.
"Now, before you guys misunderstand, Lucas is not my boyfriend." Y/N declared over a pizza with Jaemin one Saturday night. "He's just... a friend..."
Jaemin raised his eyebrow. "You mean a friend with benefits? Cos based on what we have to hear every single Friday night, none of us think you guys are friends. Speaking of which.... Jeno wants me to talk to you."
"Let me guess, you lost rock paper scissors. Again. And that's why you're the one speaking to me."
"Well, we have house rules to follow..." Jaemin started, looking somewhat uncomfortable.
"Jeno and his stupid house rules." Y/N sighed. "What now? I can't bring Lucas home?"
"It's getting kind of weird for all of us...."
"You guys bring girls home all the time!" Y/N protested.
"I don't." Jaemin said. It was true.
"Jeno does. Haechan does. Even Renjun! Remember that weird Yoga chick he was seeing?"
"But they're not loud. Lucas sounds like he has a loudhailer in his throat and it's weird hearing him......we end up having to use headphones."
"I've tried asking him to tone it down. But he gets too excited when I blow him..." Y/N grinned as Jaemin covered his ears with his hands, not wanting to hear the details.
"Look, Jeno says he appreciates that YOU have gotten less loud since that time you were dating Yang Yang. But Lucas he's just.... too expressive. Can't you do it at his house or something? It's not the moaning as much as the dirty talk, you know?" Jaemin's voice was getting tinier and tinier.
"If Jeno has a problem, why can't he tell me himself?" I know it's not Haechan or Renjun who are complaining. Haechan's always gaming with his stupid headphones on and Renjun's always listening to music on his noise cancelling ones."
Jaemin sighed. "Don't put me in a tough spot, Y/N..."
He looked at her with puppy dog eyes.
"Fine. I'll speak to Lucas. But I'm only doing it cos of you, cos you good Catholic boy and virgin and all."
Jaemin rolled his eyes. "For the last time, Y/N, I'm not a virgin!"
Lucas took the news surprisingly well and he was happy to have her hang at his apartment instead. Which turned out to be a better thing, since his apartment was bigger and his housemates were never around. Y/N wondered why she insisted on making out at her apartment to begin with.
"I'm surprised Jeno was the one with the problem.." Lucas said after they had made out and she was snuggling in his arms.
"He has all these rules. The worst part is he makes Jaemin speak to me instead of telling me directly."
"It makes sense. You and Jaemin are close."
"I'm close to all four of them."
"No no no." Lucas said, "Each of them has a different thing with you."
"Explain, Mr Wong." she said, looking up at him.
"I think Jeno knows both of you have strong characters so he has Jaemin speak to you instead when there's an issue so you guys won't argue. He prefers to keep things light, so the most you're gonna get is Jeno making fun of you for having a thing for foriegn men."
"What about Haechan?"
"Haechan's your gaming bestie. You talk about gaming, and game together. But he'd kick the ass of anyone who gives you trouble."
"I think I'm least close to Renjun."
"I don't think it's that. It's more Renjun is kind of in his own world. He's like that with everyone. But he feels close to you guys."
Y/N was impressed.
"What about Jaemin?"
"Jaemin's like your total opposite. But you guys get each other. I like him. He's a good guy."
"Yeah he's a virgin." Y/N joked.
"He's a good looking guy! Heck, if I was a chick I'd go after him man!" Lucas said, his eyes expressive as always.
"Well, he's a good guy. I've never seen him bring a girl home."
"Come on man, when it comes to hormones, even good guys turn bad."
Lucas was driving her home when she got a call from Jaemin.
"Are you alone?" Jaemin asked. He sounded strange. "I need help."
"Are you ok?" Y/N asked. "I'm with Lucas. Where are you?"
"Oh. I'll call someone else..."
"Don't be an idiot, Jaemin. Where are you?"
"Hospital." he said. "Can you come? Just don't tell anyone anything. Not even Lucas."
She found him in a bad state at the hospital. Sitting in a daze, blood stains on his crumpled shirt. Y/N had never seen Jaemin look so small.
"Hey" she half whispered. He looked up.
"I can go now. I got an x-ray done. My nose is not broken. And it's finally stopped bleeding." he said. "I already collected my medicines. Mostly painkillers."
"What happened?" she asked.
"I don't want to talk about it." he said.
"Let's get home and get you out of these bloody clothes. And then you can tell me after you've had a good night's sleep."
"Can i sleep in your room tonight?" he asked. It was an unsual request. "I'm feeling quite shaken."
"Yeah. Sure. Let's do that."
It was 2am and he still couldn't sleep. She could feel him toss and turn next to her.
"No, I can't sleep either."
He sat up.
"I need to get my ID card back. Can you follow me tomorrow?"
"Your ID card?"
"I was fooling around with a first year chick in her house. Her parents came back and caught us. Her dad took my ID away, said he was going to lodge a police report against me for tresspassing his house and taking advantage of his daughter. Well, that's after he beat me up."
Y/N sat up. This was interesting, she thought.
"She's 18?" she asked.
"18 is legal you dumbass." she slapped her forehead.
"I thought it was 21.."
Y/N groaned. "I can't believe you're so stupid."
"But the trespassing thing?"
"They don't have a case Jae. I'm sure you can prove you were invited there. Even if she lies and said she didn't invite you. They can't prove it beyond a reasonable doubt."
"I'm so glad you're studying law."
"It's illegal for him to detain your ID. YOU can report him."
"Oh. I didn't know that."
"Can you go sleep now that you know you're not actually in trouble?"
"Yes. Thanks Y/N." he said, turning to face the opposite side.
But Y/N couldn't sleep. Her mind was running a million miles a minute. Jaemin made out with someone. What was he like when making out? Was he gentle? Was he sweet like he always was to everyone? Was he a dom or sub? What did he do with the girl? Did he have fun?
Her own thoughts made her sick. Feeling a stir in her stomach made her sick. This was her best friend she was thinking of. She had to stop. Maybe she needed a shower.
Taking a towel with her to the bathroom, she shut the door, stripping quickly and getting under the hot jets of water. Damn it, Y/N, she scolded herself. Not Na Jaemin. What happened to your thing for Chinese guys?
She soaped herself trying to escape the mental picture of Jaemin, between the girl's thighs, lapping on her clit mercilessly, his eyes twinkling like they would whenever Jeno or Haechan said something witty. Suddenly, she was thinking of him between her legs, lapping at her core.
She brought her fingers to her clit, rubbing them from side to side. She leaned against the bathroom wall, moving more aggressively. She was wet. Biting her lip she pushed two fingers into her pussy, thrusting them in and out, the sound of the shower masking the wet noises as her fingers moved.
The muscles in her stomach were tightening. She could no longer hold back, thinking of Jaemin thrusting into her, looking at her with an intense gaze. She wanted him bad.
Slowly she came undone, as she moaned into her hands while cumming.
Suddenly, someone was knocking aggressively on the bathroom door. Y/N froze.
"I need to pee!" Haechan shrieked. "Hurry! I need to go back to my game!"
"Give me 2 minutes I'll be done." Y/N said, drying herself with her towel and getting dressed, mind still dazed from thinking about Jaemin. She knew their friendship was never going to be the same ever again.
She was just wondering how easy or hard it was going to be, to get Jaemin to join her on the other side.
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did this for dreamies because i've been in the mood for dream
never done headcannons before but here goes... apologies in advance
**Y/N has an emotional day and needs to be cheered up. Y/N not being herself and trying to get back into doing what she loves. Has hopes to move to L.A. to pursue music film, but doesn’t think that she can do it on her own.
so he’s like the most awkward person ever...
but he has this thing where he makes people feel super comfortable around him, that’s why he’s insanely likeable
he’d def notice that you were acting different
he’s said he’s touchy with affection before, but like not too obvious so i think he’d do little things
like just rubbing your hand, or holding it for a bit for no reason, because he wants to
he’d def push you to pursue what you want, tbh i don’t think there’d be anyone in nct that wouldn’t encourage you
then maybe he’d play you some songs on his guitar and you’d have a sweet little night in for emotional support
i can see renjun being super empathetic and realizes a change happens with y/n very quickly
he’d sit you down and you’d have a level headed convo with him about why you’re upset
when you talk it out he’s super supportive esp because he loves that stuff
he lets you know that you should appreciate your work and stuff more
be more confident because you’re good
maybe it’s because i’ve been in the mood for stargazing renjun, but maybe he’d take you somewhere late and you’d just relax in each other’s company and go stargazing
he would get concerned as he notices a change but i feel like he might not confront it
i rmbr he said that he bottles things up and prob wouldn’t want to say anything because he doesn’t know how to handle it
he’d probably be a little more touchy to comfort you and he’d def notice but he’d just watch
like you have this feeling that he knows, but he doesn’t do anything about it for a bit
eventually he’d come around and you’d talk
maybe give you one of his hoodies and chill together until you feel better
he’d try to cheer you up in other ways besides words at first
like he would crack jokes and be all touchy with you so that you feel better and comforted
like big bear hugs and cuddling up next to you
i could see him throwing his legs over your lap a lot (idk why)
he’d do a lot of that baby talk thing that he does as well, like it’s his way of comforting you but not really obvious, lots of pouts
but he notices that it’s not helping too much and you guys talk about it
would want to play games as a healing thing, but instead maybe he’d sing you some songs or you’d watch a movie and relax
oooh, maybe build a fort, i could see him doing that for fun
would worry about you distancing yourself and when he finds out he’d shower you with affection so that you know that he loves and appreciates you
like an incredible amount of affection
(rmbr that vid of him teasing renjun about his hair color not suiting him and then when renjun agreed his face fell and he did that thing where he pouted and reassured him with puppy eyes???)
he’d get all pouty and touchy with you
then he’d make sure that you knew that you need to do what you want because you are certainly good enough
too much coffee is not good for you (lmao)so he’d make you a hot tea and stay up with you
he’d notice and i feel like he’d understand the mood quickly
like i said before, when he’s not loud af and hyper, he’d be super soft with his s/o
you’d talk about it and he’d be super encouraging.
chenle. is. a. hype. man.
after you talk about it he’d def tell you about how amazing you are and completely ignore anything that you claim otherwise
then he’d def want to make you laugh and cheer you up and he’d do that for you
would worry from afar.
idk if it’s because i still see him as a shy little bean, but i feel like he would notice a difference but take a while to confront it because he’s scared
he’d like nervously sit you down and tap on your shoulder shyly
(when his finger does that weird little thing, like he doesn’t know where to put them... like his pinky... idk if that made sense)
he’d hug you and let you rest your head on his shoulder as he awkwardly pats your head
but he’d eventually get there and encourage you
maybe spend the rest of the night watching a movie??
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