Recent con has made it clear as to why Jared would get depressed time and time again when he was doing SPN? And why is he in a far better mood when he was with Walker?
Imagine getting slighted and dissed at an event that was started because of you. You are looked down upon by colleagues whom you helped and advice to be part of this circuit. They don't even care for you and make fun of your expense, and you don't have any choice but to endure. Becoz lashing or saying anything will only hurt your image and will make you look like an asshole.
If this isn't enough, the same behavior is carried on to your work. People have realised that you won't do much about it, so the ill treatment continues at work. What makes it worse is that you have to not only act brotherly towards the guy who was the reason behind the ill-treament to maintain the facade but also stroke his ego and praise him for everything.
You will let it go at first, and you might take in a stride, but as it continues, it starts gnawing at you. Slowly, it starts chipping at you, making you sad and slowly you become disinterested in the work you used to like the most.
You could see this happening with Jared. There was a huge difference between Jared that was in the earlier panels vs. Jared that was in the panel towards the end of SPN. You could see how Jensen and fans' constant dissing and ridiculing made Jared vary. What made me angry was how Jensen and Co was trying to ridicule Jared about dad jokes simply because those are the ones that connect him the most with the audience. The entire drum roll beat is the most ridiculous thing of cons.
It is totally understandable why Jared said that Walker reignited his love for acting. Imagine how ugly it must have been for Jared that he stop loving the craft he once loved the most
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Jensen on Destiel
Okay! So we're always getting "Jensen doesn't like Destiel and said it wasn't real one time years ago" thrown in our faces by bitter no-lifes who can't just let other people enjoy things. So I thought it'd be fun to compile a list of all the times Jensen talked positively about Dean and Cas's relationship!
Right now it's just a list of things I remember from being in this fandom since 2011. Eventually I will add links to sources, video sources wherever possible. Watch this space!
(Also, if there's something that isn't referenced here, feel free to reblog or reply and I'll add it to this post! I want to grow this post as big as possible so we can always remind ourselves how little the one or two comments antis constantly reference actually matter, especially given how much of this comes after those comments were made, indicating Jensen has long since changed his mind.)
Straight from the Jackles Mouth
Jensen talking about Dean and Cas's relationship and how important it is to Dean.
Jensen talking about the confession scene, Castiel's goodbye, and he, Misha, and Dick improvising the handprint.
"Dean has no taste, clearly."
"What are you looking forward to tackling this season?" "Cas."
Jensen talking about he and Misha watching and sharing fan reactions to the confession.
Jensen talking about asking a crew member to film the confession on his phone so he can remember it as Jensen and not only as Dean.
Jensen talking about a lot of his reaction being cut out of the confession scene's final edit.
Talking about Dean and Cas's relationship transcending human understanding (yes I do count this, he was trying to do damage control after Jared's homophobic rant).
Saying Dean wasn't making any decisions in the confession scene, which emphasizes that Dean was not rejecting Cas by not being able to say anything back in the moment.
Saying after Cas was gone Dean was thinking "I didn't give him anything. I should have said "I love you, too."
Saying if s15 Dean (who was LITERALLY SO MAD AT CAS HE COULDN'T LOOK AT HIM for half the season) could give s4 Dean any single piece of advice, it'd be to keep the weird angel around because he'll be the best friend Dean's ever had.
Talking about Dean and Cas's reunion and how he hopes we'll get to see it someday. It would be a big hug and then "can we talk about that good-bye a little bit?"
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Fan Encounters
"I live it" in reference to Destiel fanart.
Signing Destiel fanart, switching his pen to match Misha's where he'd already signed it.
Choosing the Lovers tarot card for Destiel
CasDean 4 Lyfe photo op
Calling a Destiel kissing fanart the papparazzi shot
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the problem in the majority of destiel conversations is the weaponization of lgbtqia. It’s a well-known fact (I thought) that the majority of shippers for any given m/m ship are straight women. Destiel isn’t about queer representation. I cried when I realized that Castiel’s so well written asexuality was destroyed to make room for another fetish ship. It was so well written…his reaction to having sex for the first time…his interactions with Meg where he tries to copy what he saw in the porno…his confusion when Hannah took off her clothes in front of him…that was queer representation. That was beautiful, multi-layered, accurate asexuality.
But because we’re in a culture obsessed with sex, no, he had to want to get in on with another man, because that’s what everyone wants to see. Straight women push these ships. They created Omegaverse BECAUSE IT RELIES ON THE FEMINIZATION OF MEN TO RATIONALIZE THE ATTRACTION BETWEEN THEM. DO YOU NOT SEE HOW INVALIDATING THAT IS TO LEGITIMATE GAY RELATIONSHIPS. im sorry I have strong feelings about omegaverse.
Pushing Destiel by claiming representation is a horrible thing to do if you’re truly an ally. It erases already established queer representation for the most popular thing in all of lgbtqia. It is a creepy fetish being pushed by straight women who want to see two men get it on, just like Stucky or everything else hellers across all fandoms throw fits about while ignoring the characters they should really care about if they truly want to see equality. Stop using lgbtqia and calling people homophobic to push your stupid fetish. It’s not an weapon. And it obviously has nothing to do with chemistry or even romantic subtext, it’s just the safer m/m ship in the fandom, so it’s the one people latched onto.
And if you haven’t seen supernatural, or have only barely seen supernatural, I don’t care if you’re part of the lgbtqia community. Don’t you fucking dare come at me. You have no idea what’s going on.
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I know a million people have already shared their opinions and thoughts on Jensen’s “brother” comment in regards to the confession, so this may be nothing new; but I can’t stop thinking about it so I wanted to write it down.
One of the main reasons I love (and kept watching) SPN over the years was because of Dean’s character-growth. He is just so human—and that is a testament to both Jensen’s acting, as well as Jensen’s age when he started playing Dean.
For fifteen years, we got to observe all those micro and macro changes within Dean’s character; much like a parent watching their child grow up. We noticed how Dean’s face changed, how his voice and confidence and openness morphed and grew … but we also got to see all the ways he stayed the same. We got to see his habits resurface again and again; and we got to see him make the same mistakes over and over. And even though it was frustrating to watch at times … it was also very, very human. It was natural. It felt real … and I think that was both intentional and unintentional on Jensen’s part.
But just like how our growing child can’t see all these changes within themselves, I don’t think Jensen can see them all within Dean—not like how we can. He’s too close; but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t psychoanalyzed Dean Winchester.
I think it’s become obvious in the last couple of years just how much Jensen has thought about Dean’s thought process, both individually as well as in the SPN canon—and he thinks of Dean as a real person. His answer at VanCon proves that. Like @pray4jensen said: it’s clear that Jensen doesn’t know where he ends and Dean begins. And how could he know? He started playing/shaping Dean in his late twenties; and science has proven that most people’s brains are still malleable at that age. He then went on to grow with that character well into adulthood—through all the formidable and pivotal moments in his own life … marriage, fatherhood, life and death. Dean IS part of him. He wasn’t just an “act” to Jensen. So much of his own development couldn’t help but sneak into Dean’s mannerisms, which made Dean feel very, very real on screen.
Think of it this way … so many of us have had difficult/complicated pasts. We have had to code-switch all our lives. There’s a version of yourself that you have to display in certain company and in certain environments; and sometimes, that version pops up without warning—when triggered by something familiar or traumatic.
Now, I’m not saying that playing Dean was a “trauma” for Jensen (at least—I hope it wasn’t), I’m just saying that we’ve all had experience playing a role in our lives; and even though we know that it’s just a role, we still think of it as a version of ourselves. We still feel like we’re just a moment away from reverting back to that person. But can you define all the qualities of that other version of you? Can you explain—in detail, just how and when and why that version pops up? No.
You can identify some things, sure, but not all. That’s why we seek out therapy. We need an outside perspective to help us find a way to bridge these versions of ourselves and make them whole again.
This is just human nature. It’s human psychology.
Dean Winchester is a version of Jensen. He is a real part of Jensen’s life. So, when Jensen answers on Dean’s behalf, he can’t help but put himself directly into that character’s boots—exactly where they stand, here and now.
And if we flash back to that confession—Jensen knows that Dean Winchester would not have been able to comprehend all the ways Castiel meant “I love you” because Jensen was Dean in that moment. And after Cas was taken, Dean still wouldn’t have been able to understand, because all the love he has ever known in his life—all the true, dependable, reliable love, has come along with the fight. Jensen knows—because he lived it all with Dean, that any love his character felt was a direct result of his battles to save the world. Sam, Benny, Mary, Charlie, Kevin, and on and on … all of them of course cared for Dean—Dean knew that, but since the constant fighting framed every one of those relationships, he couldn’t help but view them all the same way: as soldiers, fighters, products of war. They were family, yes ... but they were all still soldiers. Even those he tried to keep out of the war, Dean still knew the reality was … they had to fight in order to stay alive. That was just the way it was. That was the way of the love Dean felt. Any kind of love beyond that was impossible, because war would inevitably take it away too. That’s why he ended things with Cassie and Lisa. That’s why he only ever pursued shallow flings and one-night stands. And that’s why, when he saw hunters who actually maintained romantic relationships—he always stared at them in wide-eyed-wonder.
Out of all the impossible things Dean had witnessed in his life, that was the one that consistently shocked him.
Hunters … in love and happy.
It felt unreal, even though it was right there in front of his eyes.
He couldn’t understand it. So, even though it apparently was possible for others, he never believed it was possible for him. It had nothing to do with sex … sex wasn’t a part of love for Dean. Sex was just a physical movement, like fighting and eating. It kept his body alive and moving forward. This impossible love he saw others maintaining … it had everything to do with heart; and for nearly fifteen years, Dean believed his heart was worthless.
It wasn’t until an angel stood in front of him on the brink of death and said: Dean, you are not a weapon to be wielded. You are beautiful. You are a man full of love who deserves to be loved, and I love you, that Dean thought any different.
It wasn’t until he heard Castiel say Dean was more than just a soldier, that Dean actually started to believe it. But that realization was still a long way off from what Castiel was actually telling him.
And Castiel knew that Dean wouldn’t understand—he knew that Dean wouldn’t be able to fully grasp his words and take them to heart; but he hoped that if he at least said them out loud … if he said them to Dean’s face and saved the man’s life, that Dean would go on to live and grow; and then someday, he would see that someone did actually love him once. Cas truly loved him—not because Dean could protect him in a fight. Not because he was a good hunter or the savior of the world, but because Dean was Dean, and that was enough.
And you know, if Dean got to live to 100, he just might’ve realized that; but he didn’t. He died too soon. And so, he never got to truly grasp what his angel was saying, and I feel like that’s what Jensen understands about Dean the most.
He understands that Dean never got the chance to understand love.
Not in that way. Not in the way Castiel meant it.
Dean was still too naive, too broken, too jaded; so, he did what all humans do, he put the complex into terms he could understand, and that was that Castiel loved him the way that Sam loved him. The way that Benny and Charlie and Kevin loved him, the way that all his found-family love him; and after Cas was gone, he buried his face into his hands and wept because once again, he failed to protect his family. And even worse, he failed to at least let Castiel go knowing that Dean loved him too—in the only way he knows how to love, he was too broken to say even that.
He let Castiel down in every way possible, so he curled into himself and sobbed.
He should have said it back.
He should have held the angel close and said it back.
Dean realized it too late, and Jensen knows how much that hurt him.
It wasn’t about sex.
It wasn’t about romance.
It was about love and loss, and Dean was all too familiar with both—but only in the ways he had seen all his life.
The love of family and the loss of family.
He never had the chance for more.
He never got to see what else his own heart was capable of.
That’s what I feel Jensen meant with that answer, and that’s what I think he understands the most about Dean's character. We may be able to see the bigger picture because we're on the outside looking in; but Jensen was in Dean’s boots every day for fifteen years.
All he could ever see was what was right in front of him—and when Castiel made that confession, Jensen could only see it through Dean's eyes. He could only feel what Dean felt. He knows that when Castiel said those words to him, that was his best and truest friend in the world saying goodbye.
Another brother-in-arms was lost to him; but this time, it felt different. It hurt more, and if Dean just had a little more time—he would've been able to understand why.
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