#jeremy corbyn memes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

d2kvirus · 1 year

Text

Dickheads of the Month: November 2022

As it seems that there are people who say or do things that are remarkably dickheaded yet somehow people try to make excuses for them or pretend it never happened, here is a collection of some of the dickheaded actions we saw in the month of November 2022 to make sure that they are never forgotten.

The optics of Suella Braverman arriving at a migrant centre in an army chinook helicopter was clearly planned, given her ranting about an “invasion” which definitely hasn't led to people petrol bombing migrant centres after she used that terminology - but when called out on the taxpayer forking out £50k for a photo op the best defence she could come up with was she choose an army helicopter because she wanted to get a good look at the coastline as if maps don't exist, and definitely not because she wanted the most fashy imagery to go with the fashy things which come out of her mouth

So it turns out that Gavin Williamson isn't just a snivelling little creep, but also a bullying little shit who when serving as Defence Secretary (before being sacked for leaking the minutes from a COBRA meeting to a mate at the Telegraph, yet somehow isn't in jail) once told somebody to slit their own throat and jump out the window, and on another occasion threatened to unleash his pet tarantula onto somebody. In other words, once again Rishi Sunak has shown superb judgment in his cabinet appointments - especially when Williamson resigned, as opposed to being sacked

...only for Wes Streeting to make it impossible for Labour to make any comment about bullying after he called Jeremy Corbyn “senile” in Commons less than 24 hours after Williamson was out the door

...and then Rishi Sunak responded to reports of Dominic Raab habitually bullying Justice Department staff by doing the square root of fuck all, even after it emerged that the MoJ made sure to have a senior civil servant in the room with Raab at all times to stop him bullying his subordinates

...and then along came Lee Anderson at PMQs to whine that the Labour MPs criticising Suella Braverman was clearly them bullying her, because if anybody knows bullying it would be the Tory MP who assaulted a member of the public at the Tory conference

In which way does Twitter owner Elon Musk tweeting from the account of the current owner of Twitter that people should vote Republican in the US midterms demonstrate the sort of “impartiality” that billionaire manchild Elon Musk said that Twitter should demonstrate?

Snivelling little creep Gavin Williamson having a meltdown and threatening then-Chief Whip Wendy Morton because he couldn't get into the Queen’s funeral should have ended his aspirations of being a minister ever again - if not for the fact that Rishi Sunak decided to make him Minister Without Portfolio for reasons beyond comprehension, and once those threatening text messages came to light that meant Sunka was now having to make excuses for two people he should not have added to his cabinet in the first place

Billionaire manchild Elon Musk appears to not be taking it well that his suggestion of tiered freeze peach is getting laughed off the platform he paid $44bn for all because Hard Drive Mag dunked on him like his name was Nagasaki, tweeting one cringy meme after another about how people are big meanies to not pay $8 a month for something which they didn't have to pay for until Musk decided to monetise it - and then reduced the cost from $20 because he failed to comprehend what Stephen King’s criticism wasn’t that he didn't want to pay $20 a month for a blue tick, but he shouldn't have to

...and then very clever businessman Elon Musk had to humiliatingly roll back his mass layoffs as it dawned on him that maybe, just maybe, there was a reason why Twitter had so many people employed as moderators and factcheckers

...and because billionaire manchild Elon Musk has the thinnest skin on record, when the inevitability of his approach to verification saw numerous Twitter users pay the $8, change their username to “Elon Musk” and tweet out some particularly harsh truths about the tax-dodging, union-avoiding, Blood Diamond-backed cretin, Musk responded by permabanning them while whining that the accounts should make it clear they were parodies...and permabanned those making it clear they were parodies

...and then billionaire manchild Elon Musk had to very quickly remove the paid verification option from Twitter after the share prices of companies including Eli Lilly and Lockheed Martin nosedived as a result of creative shitposting - although it was coincidentally removed as soon as somebody creatively shitposted masquerading as Tesla, almost as if Musk wasn't that interested in other companies’ share price tumbling, but as soon as his own started to nosedive even harder he stepped right in to stop that happening

...and then billionaire manchild Elon Musk was diagnosed with a terminal case of small man syndrome as his response to a Twitter engineer replying to one of Musk’s tweets that was full of technically incoherent gibberish that demonstrated that he doesn’t even know how the platform he paid $44bn for even works by telling him how it works and how his tweet was downright incorrect - so, of course, the God King of Twitter fired the engineer via tweet. And then several more engineers for similar reasons. And then posted a tweet slagging off the engineers he fired for exposing his gross ignorance

...shortly before billionaire manchild Elon Musk thought it would be a brilliant idea to pitch an ultimatum to Twitter’s engineers: agree to work significantly longer hours (in no small part due to the mass layoffs) by 5pm the following day or accept three months severance. Soon afterwards, Twitter’s HQ was shut down for the weekend, which definitely had nothing to do with the engineers shrugging their shoulders and deciding to take the severance instead of continue having to deal with the clueless billionaire’s bullshit

...and then billionaire manchild Elon Musk had a long, drawn-out meltdown on his Twitter feed because Apple was no longer advertising Twitter on the App Store while screeching about the c-o-n-spiracy of Apple’s hidden 30% tax on all app purchases which has been front and centre of the App Store’s ToS for well over a decade, all while looking uncannily like he was whipping up his followers to attack Apple’s Tim Cook while howling that Cook wasn't replying to his tweets immediately as if CEOs are supposed to be on Twitter all day - only to suddenly do a 180 and say there was never any risk of Twitter being dropped from the App Store, which is utterly unhinged behaviour

Remember the days when Tim Pool claimed they weren't a member of the alt-right, in spite regularly being seen hanging out with the alt-right? Well he seems to have forgotten that, based on him responding to the Club Q shooting by falsely (if that even has to be explained at this point) calling the victims paedophiles who groomed kids to amplify the alt-right dogwhistling about drag shows that's been getting increasingly nastier for months

...as demonstrated by mug salesman Steven Crowder quote tweeting Pool with what looks uncannily like the fourteen words, which goes to show just how much of a dumpster fire Twitter rapidly became under its new, clueless leadership

Unifying force Keir Starmer once again demonstrated what an alternative he is to the Tories when harrumphing on Sophie Ridge that there are too many overseas workers recruited to work in the NHS, somehow forgetting that the NHS is literally supported by overseas workers due to how prohibitively expensive studying for a medical degree is and, of course, also stopping short of suggesting existing NHS staff get a pay raise

Nobody was expecting Kari Lake to take losing the Arizona gubernatorial election well considering how badly she would take non-American journalists questioning the version of reality she lives in by saying that foreigners aren't allowed to comment about American politics (which she did to both British and Australian journalists), but bloody hell we haven’t seen a meltdown like hers since...well, the end of 2020

I’m sure that it's a coincidence that the ultra-relatable Rishi Sunak happened to be selling poppies at Westminster tube station at the exact same time that a gaggle of client journalists happened to be passing through to photograph and film him doing so out of the goodness of his heart

...and then unifying force Keir Starmer was papped a day later doing the exact same thing outside St Pancras, once again by complete coincidence when press photographers were passing by with their equipment in hand, which definitely didn't look staged either

It turns out that, when Agnes Callard isn't crossing a University of Chicago picket line and justifying it with some guff about a “philosophical emergency”, she's taking to Twitter to pretend that her children are grateful to her for throwing away their Halloween candy when they go to bed, so is either cruel to her children or somebody who types out bizarre fantasies on Twitter about how she wishes she was cruel to their children

The ultra-relatable Rishi Sunak claimed that the reason he did not wear a World AIDS Day ribbon is because he does not believe in wearing things on his lapel. Except for when he wore a poppy on his lapel for several days the previous month. Or at least two different badges to show solidarity with Ukraine. Those were on his lapel and photographed many, many times

Pure bastardtrade from Mercedes-Benz when they looked at BMW locking their top speeds behind a paywall and, instead of thinking of not doing that to steal a march on their most direct competitors by not demanding their customers pay a subscription so they could floor it, but instead copied the idea wholeheartedly

Unifying force Keir Starmer said he could not attend the first MPs surgery for his constituency due to urgent business, only for that “urgent business” to be him attending The Spectator’s annual award ceremony - where he was awarded Politician of the Year, a real good look for a Labour leader...

Did you know that Lady Susan Hussey is 83? Because a lot of people are bringing that up as if it's some kind of defence at her assuming that Ngozi Fulani must be a migrant because of her skin colour

In the latest bid of Matt Hancock to gain relevance outside of true crime podcasts, he joined the cast of I’m A Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here - which immediately saw him suspended as an MP for prioritising eating kangaroo testicles over knowing where his constituency might be, apparently forgetting that Nadine Dorries had the whip suspended when she appeared on the same show a decade earlier

...and then it emerged that Matt Hancock had hired a PR firm to try and help him cheat his way to victory by encouraging TikTok users to use all five of their allotted votes to keep him in the jungle and showed them how to do it, which technically isn't a breach of the voting rules - until you look at the stats of the account gaming the system and find yourself asking why it has almost twenty times the followers of any other contestant

Balan Wonderworld is no longer the worst thing Yuji Naka has done since joining Square Enix, as Naka along with fellow executives Taisuke Sazaki and Fumiaki Suzuki were arrested after it was found that they had sneakily invested heavily in Aiming shares shortly before Square Enix announced that Aiming would be making Dragon Quest Tact, seemingly unaware that they’d get found out sooner or later

Nice job by the Qatari World Cup organisers when they decided, just two days before the tournament kicks off, that fans can't drink in the stands of the stadiums after all but they can drink in the executive boxes. Luckily we didn't hear much kvetching from The FA about this, given their archaic rule about the lower orders not being allowed to drink in view of the pitch, a rule which doesn't apply to rugby or cricket

...and then FIFA turned around and told captains they were no longer allowed to wear OneLove armbands and would be booked if they took to the pitch wearing one, which definitely doesn't open the door to the captains for the final doing so because it's not like being booked in the final would affect them much

Once again England fans went on the charm offensive during a major tournament, be it mocking USA fans about 9/11 in the stadium for England’s match with the USA, while the fans who didn't get any further than Tenerife having a mass punch-up with Wales fans. Charming bunch as usual...

Perhaps it would be for the best if Martin Daubney went back to school, considering he went on GB News to tell all three of their viewers that a Twitter poll proved that the public still supports Jonestown - in spite the small inconvenience of 55% of the vote on GB News’ Twitter feed being against Jonestown, which Daubney couldn’t bring himself to admit. But he called people who disagree “Remaniacs”, so that makes it better...

There is no dick energy smaller than Nick Adams having “Alpha Male” in his Twitter username before routinely tweeting about what is and isn't “Alpha male” behaviour, which is apparently eating wings and drinking beer at Hooters. Just a thought, Nick: throw in a Brazzers subscription and you’re living the fantasy of a 14-yar old boy

It’s safe to assume that Babylon Bee really didn't like Stephen King putting Elon Musk in his place, that place being on his scrawny backside, based on their “satirical” headline about King reading an awful lot like a 13-year old ranting because somebody on an internet forum exposed them as a clueless oaf. But remember, right wing comedy is good...

...and then Babylon Bee quote tweeted the exact same “joke” to explain the “joke”, which was just them typing out the “joke” in full a second time, because comedy is definitely repeating a joke which failed to land the first time in the hope it lands a second

As promotions go, the one by KFC where they suggested their German customers celebrate the anniversary of Kristallnacht with some cheesy chicken is one that surely won't see the light of day ever again...right?

Just as Braun Strowman had somewhat rehabilitated his image after his WWE return, he only goes and takes to Twitter to mouth off about smaller wrestlers - which promptly got him dunked on by those same smaller wrestlers both within WWE and signed to other companies, which really made it look like Strowman could not control his narrative very well...

Smooth moves by Streatham Rovers FC when they posted a tweet commemorating the 21st anniversary of 9/11. On the 9th of November. Yeah...

#dickheads of the month

0 notes